Chapter Text
Penelope Featherington has always been so organised. She is a planner. She meets deadlines. She puts in the work. She knows what she expects from her life and what her life expects from her. Now she feels cold as she stares at the stick in her hand. Positive. It's not positive though. She isn't sure she wants a baby at all and it certainly isn't in her five year plan. Her ten year plan maybe. She plans for everything. Everything except this.
"Babe?" Her boyfriend's voice sounds through their flat, and she decides to just rip the band aid off and tell him. They both work unnatural hours, he works as a breakfast radio presenter telling tales of his years of travel and winning everyone's hearts and she works as writer often typing away whenever inspiration strikes, so it is only lunchtime.
Colin is in the open plan kitchen, dining and living room making himself a cup of coffee. He turns to beam at her, but his smile instantly drops. "Pen, you're shaking." He states, crossing the room to wrap her in a hug.
"I'm pregnant." She says into his shoulder.
He tenses for a moment and then relaxes again. "Okay." He states. "What is it you need right now?" His voice sounds muffled and far away. "Pen," He repeats. "love, what do you need?" He repeats, still sounding so muffled. "Hey, just think about the now Penelope, what do you need? A cup of tea? A hug? To speak to someone? I can call Mum or Eloise." He offers.
"Do we still have the good wine?" She asks.
Colin laughs. "No, we drank that all... probably the night you got pregnant actually." He chuckles. "And even if we did, you can't have it I'm afraid." He adds.
Penelope sighs. "I don't want a baby right now." Colin just nods. "But I don't know what I do want to do."
Colin nods again. "And that is completely okay." He states. "We don't have to make any decisions right now."
They spend the rest of the night cuddled up on the sofa, and Penelope begins to wonder if it's a false positive, because now she thinks about it she hasn't really had any symptoms. The next morning though is a Saturday and Colin works weekdays and Penelope tries to take Saturdays off, so they're meant to be having a lie in. Instead Penelope wakes up at four am, with a churning in her stomach and before she can even react to it she finds herself throwing up over the duvet cover. Colin wakes up immediately and doesn't bat an eye lid at the sight, he just grabs her hair and places a hand on her back as though it's totally normal to wake up to a duvet covered in vomit.
That morning proves to be the first of many like that, although now they keep a bucket beside the bed. It's in those moments when the child inside of her is causing her to get horribly sick that she decides she wants to keep the baby. She isn't sure why. Something just clicks for her and Colin tells her he was hoping she would keep it, because he is ready for fatherhood.
Colin is at work when she wakes up to find the white sheets stained red. It can't have happened long ago, because she had already woken up vomiting in the middle of the night. She completely panics and calls Eloise knowing Colin's phone will be switched off. They haven't told anyone yet, it's still so very new to them, but Penelope needs someone now. "El," She sobs. "I think I'm having a miscarriage."
Eloise comes over immediately, bringing her mother with her and they drive Penelope to A and E where they are reassured that everything is okay and they do a scan which shows there is a baby. Colin is beside himself when he arrives at the hospital as they're leaving, but he just throws his arms around Penelope the second he sees her. "You're all right." He repeats over and over. Penelope nods and Violet hands him the scan the ultrasound technician had been kind enough to print off.
When they get back to the flat Violet quietly leads Penelope away from where Colin and Eloise are arguing over who makes better coffee and gives her a hug. "I'm so happy for you and Colin." She says. "And I want you to know that you have always been one of my own and I'm here for whatever you might need." Penelope bursts into tears and finds herself sobbing on Violet's shoulder.
Things go well for a week and then one lunchtime Colin comes home to find her passed out on the bathroom floor. All the color is drained from her face and there is puddle of vomit in front of her. He immediately calls an ambulance, then his mother, then Eloise and then Daphne because they have always been close and he needs some comfort. Colin is in shock when the ambulance crew arrive and Violet ends up riding in the ambulance while Daphne drives Colin and Eloise to the hospital.
When they arrive, Penelope is awake and saying she's sorry over and over again. They have her hooked up to an IV. "She needs fluid." The doctor explains. "She was dehydrated from the vomiting."
Colin spends the rest of the night watching as the colour slowly but surely returns to Penelope's face, holding her hair back when she gets sick again and telling her stories of his travels that he has told her a million times before, but she is asking to hear again.
They tell the family before the twelve week mark. Neither of them are that bothered about it and they all suspect something is wrong anyway. They are met with congratulations followed by an argument between Gregory and Hyacinth over who is going to be the favorite, which ends up in a black eye, a bust lip and a hospital trip for concussion. Still they are so very happy.
Eloise's wedding day arrives and Penelope has just hit eleven weeks, she goes through her normal morning of vomiting, reassures Colin she'll be fine and arrives at the bridal suite of the hotel they're staying in to find everyone panicking about getting ready, while Eloise sits on the bed flicking though a magazine looking totally unfazed. Penelope can't help but laugh. This breaks the tension and calms everyone down. Colin sticks to her like glue for the day, which does prove helpful when the main makes her sick and she can barely walk to the bathroom. He carries her. He spends the night panicking that she is dancing to much, and Kate remarks how like Anthony he is. He worries when she stumbles over a rogue lipstick on the dance floor and Eloise finds it all hilarious. They enjoy the day though.
The twelve week scan is the big one, although Penelope's miscarriage scare means she's already had a scan. Colin hasn't been present at one though and there is an argument between the Bridgerton's over who else gets to go. Penelope has minimal contact with her own family, so when she's told two people can be in the room she says the Bridgerton's can choose between themselves. "Did you mean to start world war three?" Colin teases her, making no effort himself to choose someone. In the end it is decided that Francesca will go with them as she is the only one not to join in the arguments. The three of them watch in awe as the baby appears on the screen and their heartbeat fills the room. Penelope is worries by how fast the heart is beating. Surely something must be very wrong? But the technician says it's totally normal and books in the next scan. Francesca thanks them profoundly for including them. Both of them are glad she came.
The sickness passes and Penelope feels human again. In fact she feels better then human. Suddenly she has energy, she knows she looks amazing and she is loving life. The Bridgerton's throw her a baby shower and she enjoys every moment of the day. The glossy pictures go up on Instagram of her cradling the bump she now has, of her and Colin beaming of her and Violet and her and various siblings and her mother comments. It's then she remembers that she hasn't actually told her mother she is pregnant, but she is more okay with that then she thought she'd be.
By the end she feels huge. She is tired of being pregnant, sick of the symptoms and desperate to meet the baby. She tries every single trick in the book. Nothing works. She curses poor Colin repeatedly for doing this to her and he in turn just gives her a small smile and tells her it won't be long. Her water breaks in the most dramatic way possible, the Bridgerton's are celebrating Francesca and Michael's engagement with a garden party. The entire family are there, and when Penelope stand up she feels a pain then a rush of water, which makes her cry out in shock. Benedict and Genevieve who are beside her instantly spring to their feet, and steady her. Everyone comes rushing. Everyone but Colin and Kate who have been sent to the supermarket for a supply restock.
Penelope is clinging to Benedict for dear life and the poor man finds himself being bundled into the back of Daphne's car with Eloise and Francesca while Penelope and Daphne get in the front. Violet follows with Gen, leaving Anthony to go and get Colin and Kate in his car and Michael, Philip and Simon in charge at the house and unfortunately for them in charged of Gregory and Hyacinth.
They cause chaos at the hospital all crowding into Penelope's room, Penelope screaming for Colin as the labor progresses much faster then the books she read on pregnancy had told her it would. Benedict and Eloise who are arguably causing the most with their panic over Penelope are sent to go and get the hospital bag from Penelope and Colin's flat. Colin and Kate come rushing in moments later, Kate explains that Anthony did not trust his siblings to drive safely while in the state they were in and so he has gone with them.
Colin rushes to Penelope's side, taking Francesca's place and grabbing her hand. Penelope is pale and in shock. "It can't happen this quickly." She tells him. Colin calmly brushes stray hairs from her face and nods. "I know." He keeps repeating, unsure of what else to say. To everyone's shock when they are told on two people can remain in the room, Penelope asks Francesca to stay as she has been so calm throughout the ordeal so far.
Agatha Eloise Bridgerton arrives not long after. She is perfect in every way and Penelope doesn't want to give her up to the nurse to be cleaned and checked over, but she is exhausted and her eyes quickly flutter shut.
When she wakes up Colin is pacing the room, cradling Agatha and telling her stories. "And we'll take you everywhere," He says. "so you can see where Daddy went and we can show Mummy too, because your world will probably just revolve around Mummy's boobs and sleep right now, but when you get older you'll discover there is so much to see and do." He adds. Penelope doesn't announce she is awake, she just leans back smiles, listens and thanks her luck starts that she gets to do this all with Colin.