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He drew a long, drawn out breath of the small pipe. A gift from an older man who figured Link to be middle aged. He didn’t know if he should take appearing older as a compliment considering other teens his age were, but regardless he got a gift of a pipe he had never used before.
He wasn’t a smoker.
He was always told it stunted the growth of lungs in teens so he never did it, but he wasn’t a teen currently, so what was the harm?
It was a gift anyway. It would be a shame to not even use it once. Addiction wasn’t a concern either. He wasn’t one to continue things he didn’t like— whether drink or food— Link focused to keep his body to remain the pinnacle of a hero’s form.
So why was he smoking when he was a hero?
Perhaps anxiety? Emotions or drifting thoughts?
He had no clear reason other than to use the gift itself, but once he started the supposed short session he found his mind at peace for a split moment. The thoughts around his tuning out and he felt like a weight lifted.
It was to be a one time thing anyways, he might as well abuse this soft buzz in his forehead to keep at bay the troubling thoughts. Had neither the time nor money to buy more so there was no worry when the pipe was used up and those guilty thoughts would come barreling down his throat. He’d be too ashamed to even look near a pipe again.
“I didn’t know you smoked.”
“I don’t.” He drawled, smoking escaping his lips with a soft frown. He couldn’t hide it— the smell was a dead give away.
Turning, he caught a familiar sight. “That doesn’t appear it to me, unless you somehow started a fire?” Time teased taking a seat next to him.
“I don’t want a lecture.” He drew another breath, resting the pipe on his thigh to take a moment to breathe in the fresh air.
“I doubt you need that right now.” He mumbled. “May I try?”
His brow twitched but he passed it off anyway.
He did watch Time draw out a breath inhaling then coughing into a closed fist. “That’s a little strong.” He wheezed, clearing himself before trying again.
“Is it?”
“So you’ve done it before?” He passed it back.
“No… I just couldn’t tell. The bar in my Hyrule that I frequent allows smokers. I’ve smelled plenty to have my nose diluted by these smells.” It probably wasn’t wise. He prided himself on being a tracker, but honestly, what could one smoke do?
“I assume it’s a gift? You don’t seem the type to buy one.”
Link twirled the small pipe between his fingers. “Yeah. An old man who came to the bar often grew to know me. It was a gift for listening to him and running a few errands. Though he also thought I was about double my age so who knows what the man thought, giving it to me.” He shrugged.
“Then any reason you're using it now?”
“I’m not one to sell a gift. It was a waste to not use it at least once. I figured now was the right time to try it out.” He drew a puff letting the air fog in his breath with the smoke. He stared at the fading trails.
“Nothing more? No worries or anything you’d like to talk about? I won’t lecture you about smoking to ease worries, but I’d rather you at least tell someone.” Time eased back waving a hand at the visible smoke. Link shut his mouth, stopping it from escaping.
Quickly he blew it to the side.
“Would it be better if I was doing it to cover up some heavy guilt or anxiety? That I wasn’t just smoking for the fact I could.” He met Time’s eye.
“I know you better than you think.”
He chuckled, brushing off the cold look.
“Then I suppose it’s doing its job— keeping those things at bay while I stare out at this view. I can barely linger on a thought before I’ve brushed it off like it never mattered in the first place. I couldn’t used to do that.” He hummed, setting the pipe on his lap and just holding it seemed to make him feel all that more better.
Time hummed, turning to stare as well. “Link— I want an answer.”
Time rarely used their name as an ultimatum for anything.
Twilight tuned out feeling all too tired for this. “I don’t like my thoughts. Speakin’ them don’t do anything for the nightmares and rememberin’— rememberin’ is always more painful.”
Time listened patiently however.
“I have dreams ‘bout falling and dying over and over, nightmares about…” his voice trailed off by those eyes drawn over Time’s frame, but said nothing more. “I have thoughts about a woman I dearly cherished, but vainly couldn’t keep. I remember things that make me feel shitty ‘bout myself, then I look at you all and I hate myself even more for being upset when I got the ‘easy’ life.” He grumbled drawing the pipe up to his lips.
“None of us have had an easy life. That doesn’t mean you can’t be upset by anything. Trauma isn’t comparable like that.” He rested a hand on his shoulder, but Twilight shrugged it off.
“But it is at tha end of the day. I got a childhood, I got the age over all of you— ain’t a single one of you, maybe save from Sky, but he was still younger, got to have that as much as I did. I didn’t lose anything from my time as hero, and still I— I was already to on up in age to be as useless as I was.” He shook his head. An ache forming at the brow of his skull. He couldn’t stand those bitter thinking thoughts when he knew he had it better.
“So what’s it to a childhood? I got to marry the woman I loved, did you?”
Twilight bit his lip. Teeth bared behind a tight frown for the man mocking the singular thing Twilight ‘lost’ but it wasn’t like he was ever owed love.
“Some things mean more to us than others.” Time continued seeing how Twilight tensed. “My childhood is nothing but rubbish to me when compared to Malon. Same with the rest of the boys. They all have something they’d go through anything to protect and keep.” Time grabbed the wrist that held the pipe lowering it to prevent Twilight from drawing a breath.
“That’s not my point! You all gave up more— you lost more! I’m a sad damn sap crying because I got rejected by someone I loved! I’m still alive! I’m still breathing! I’ve got nothing to show for the damage but I’m still in pain and I don’t deserve to be! Not when others like Legend have lost numerous more to even more journeys!” He shouted back, teeth gritted in frustration.
“I just— I want this guilt to go away.” He clinched his chest. His stomach tightening in a knot. “I don’t want to feel guilty for wantin’ ta cry, ta bawl knowing there’s someone I can’t help. I just— I want that feeling to go away.” He stared at the pipe. “Smoking was helping.” He shrugged Time’s arm off.
“It only helps for a little while. It’s not some magic cure Twi.”
“You think I don’t know that?” He sneered. “I don’t deserve this peace! I don’t deserve to have all my guilt taken from my shoulders as the rest of you suffer.”
“What makes you think we’re suffering?”
How could they not? He wanted to scoff. Sure he couldn’t tell for the other but Shade made every mention of his guilt that ate him alive. There would be no regret if he wasn’t suffering!
“If y’all aren’t suffering, then why am I being the one selfish wallowing in my guilt while y’all all seem to be able ta carry on just fine?” He clicked his tongue. “It makes me feel worse knowing I can’t even handle these damn feelings.”
“Everyone has something they can’t handle.” Time grabbed his hand intent to not let him shake it off this time. “I can’t handle watching you all in pain. Knowing I failed as a hero and didn’t just leave my descendant alone to finish a fight I couldn’t, but even worse to make three separate timelines, all seemingly worse than in their own ways? I can’t stand the guilt of knowing that.”
“My point exactly— why should I get to cry over something unimportant when you’ve experienced something worse? Even now all you do is mumble and grieve.”
Why couldn’t Time just get it through his thick head?
“And mumble and grieve is my guilt.” He sighed. “Look, I don’t know everything, but at the end of the day blaming yourself isn’t something that helps. I don’t know all the answers and I won’t pretend I do, but if I catch you smoking away your problems again then I’ll become your problem.”
Twilight snorted. “I thought I said I didn’t want a lecture?”
“Well you wouldn’t listen to me saying it’s not your fault so why should I listen to you when you don’t want to be told off?” Cheeky bastard.
“If I’m being honest, I don’t care whether you smoke or drink or whatever else you might do for leisure. I’d be a hypocrite but there’s a difference between enjoying smoking, and enjoying the lack of feeling it gives you.” He tapped the pipe drawing his attention.
Twilight side eyed him, and for a moment all he could see was Shade. The way that stern look fell over him, that sharp gaze pinning him down with acute seriousness.
“You are a hypocrite.”
“In what way?”
“Takin’ all that guilt and sayin’ it shouldn’t be shared… cuz the thing is yer just the same. I could tell you it wasn’t your fault and you’d nod yer head and say it wasn’t but I know deep inside that guilt is eatin’ you alive like poison.”
“What makes you figure that?”
He remained silent. Time didn’t stop him when he drew a long smoke.
It seemed to be the only reason their conversation could continue was if Twilight wasn’t feeling his own emotions.
“You ever figure you know the outcome of somethin’ yet no matter what chu’ do chu’ can’t ever fix it?” A soft buzz was at the forefront of his head making his words slur.
Time stared at him for a long minute. “Yeah. I felt that way for a while.”
“When’d it leave?”
When had it left? Probably never. Despite his namesake, time always felt out of his hands and more of a whim. To know the beginning, middle, and the end was a sort of dread that seeped deep into the bones and suffocated its surrounds. Having the illusion of control and the childishness of a twelve year old with a god hanging over their shoulder felt like some sorta sick divine punishment.
“I don’t think it ever did.” He traced under his right eye. The inflictions of his hubris.
“I didn’t figure.” Twilight hissed more to himself. Words just a tad too loud for Time to hear.
“What makes you think that?”
A long pause drew between them. Smoke fills the air and draws the silence longer.
“I used to wonder what it would be like to have met you.”
Time blinked, eyes widening. “You knew of me? You said when we were talking about the timelines you said you came after me, but that my legacy didn’t live on. That I was forgotten to time.”
Was there a chance Twilight knew him? He originally thought several hundred years but could that number have been smaller?
“I don’t wanna talk about this.” Twilight frown was soft but his words meant more.
“Then why bring it up? We’re talking about this, you don’t get that choice.” Time was tired of leaving their long talks on bitter thoughts and sharp words just to start again the next time he found the younger struggling.
He was tired of watching Twilight expect the world to fall around him because he expressed his damn emotions and Time can’t begin to imagine where he’d have ever learned to do such a thing.
Twilight glared for all it was worth and though it surprised Time with the amount of anger in the younger for just speaking, he was undeterred. “This isn’t yer damn problem, so stay the hell outta mine. I’d rather wallow in my misery than call you to listen to a pitiful sob story.”
The wolf hero stood dumping the smoking clump of tobacco he’d been smoking and digging it into the ground with the heel of his boot. He took off into the woods avoiding camp to let himself air out from the smoke that clung to him.
Time stared after, not knowing what to say to get an ounce of the guilt Twilight held for himself or the self hatred that spewed from his own words.
Wordlessly he picked himself up, wishing he had half the skill Twilight had to follow after the young man but perhaps it was better if he actually had time to himself to consider Time’s words.
There was always the next day. Though Time did not prefer the moments their arguments ended and left on bitter notes, he’d never stop having them if not to see Twilight happy for even a moment.
But today was not that day and Time could respect the tension that had grown between them. He could only hope those barriers Twilight held weren’t so high next time they talked.
—
Twilight was caught once again under the dull light of the moon, purple and honey colored clouds still in the sky as the sun was setting. Stars peeking out with growing strength of brightness reflecting off the moon.
The pipe he had discarded for a regular bottle of alcohol that was sure to get him drunk and crying by the end of the night.
The feeling still lingered in his chest and though the thought of not wanting to have these emotions were tempting, he didn’t want to test Time’s theory of a scolding for smoking for that desire.
Instead he grabbed a drink in hope of doing the opposite and releasing all his hatred onto himself. Not the best idea but maybe the guilt would lessen if he accepted the pain of his own words and the wrath that would follow.
A few drinks in and he was feeling the venom rising in his thoughts and the warm buzz in his chest. Flicks of fire settled in his belly and rose with his anger.
“Another night I see?”
He jumped partially to hear that familiar voice. “I’m not sharing.” He gritted as Time sat at his side once again.
“That’s fine.” He grinned, producing his own bottle of warm milk from Lon Lon. “Mal’ makes the best alcoholic milk you’d ever taste. I’d offer a shot but as we aren’t sharing it’s all mine.” He grinned, settling himself down to pour out a glass.
Twilight sighed despairing the night already, and he wasn’t even drunk.
“Why the hell are you here?”
“Why are you here?” He shot back, throwing back a shot of milk. “You don’t get to ask a question you yourself aren’t willin’ ta answer.” He cheered to a second that grew Twilight's irritation.
“Getting drunk.” He gritted. “Now why the hell are you out here?”
He shrugged with a playful glint. He raised the milk, shaking the bottle. “Getting drunk too. What’s the harm in the company? Sometimes drunk people do stupid things. You’ll stop me if I don’t something stupid yeah? I’d stop you, promise.”
It was like that gaze knew something behind Twilight's motives.
“I don’t need stopping.”
Time stared at him for a long hard moment. Picking apart his answer.
Twilight expected a quick jab but it was clear Time was determined to draw out the damn night.
“Don’t think you’d do something stupid? I’ve seen plenty of drunks and never someone who's never done something stupid!” The elder hero grinned, setting himself up for a story. “I once knew a guy who got so drunk he lay on the bar counter thinkin’ it was his bed.”
“People like that shouldn’t drink.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right. As long as you have someone stoppin’ you there ain’t much harm. Though there’s also people that’ll hurt themselves gettin’ drunk ‘n all.” Eyes pierced his soul. “Once I saw a guy accidentally stab himself with a fork. Poor sap didn’t even realize till his wife screamed.”
Time filled the oppressive air with quick little stories.
He downed a third shot and from the way Time’s words slurred it was clear the Lon Lon special was something stronger.
Twilight sighed. Once again Time had ruined his night. “Go to bed. You don’ need to be drinkin’.”
“Well if I ain’t then you aren’t.” He patted his back hard. “Gotta have two people ta drink.”
“When the hell did that become a rule?”
“Just now.” The older smiled innocently but it was anything but. Twilight couldn’t find it in him to care, throwing back his bottle. Time be damned he was at least drinking this bottle like his usual plan.
“Whoa, can’t even taste the flavor of all yer doin’ is chugging.”
“Just regular, no taste.”
“What’s the point of drinking without good taste? Especially by yourself at night, it seems like you came out here to do something.”
Time didn’t let his gaze linger on the boy as he poured another shot for himself.
“I did.” He answered softly, feeling the burn against his eyes and the cave-in of his chest.
“You came to make a bad decision? Something’ stupid?” Time asked softer, letting their shoulders bump. He hadn’t even realized how close his mentor had gotten to wrap an arm around his waist and tug him closer.
His fingers tugged at his sleeve. “It’s not a mistake.” He was firm. The ache in his chest rumbled to life.
The silence was long and unkind till Time grabbed him and tugged him into his lap. “It’s a mistake if it hurts you, Pup. A mistake is thinkin’ you deserve to be in pain and hurtin’ yer’self because you aren’t happy.”
The tears stung his eyes. He felt like a child being cradled and rocked, wanting to wail. They didn’t stop. He wouldn’t let them.
“You don’t understand—“
“Then make me understand! Tell me every little damn thing about yourself. I want to hear every damn reason you think you’re allowed to hurt yourself because I’m not seeing it!” He snapped quicker than Twilight could’ve finished.
This wasn’t what he imagined. Everything about the man before him was great and just as he remembered and would’ve expected and somehow he wasn’t disappointed by everything Twilight was.
“Twilight, you're not running from me today.” Time’s grip was proving that quickly. “We either sit here all night till the alcohol runs from our body, or you tell me why you want to hurt yourself.”
A final ultimatum. Sitting back, Twilight rested his head on Time’s shoulder. Sinking into the warmth envious.
He swallowed, flicking his tongue out to lick dry lips that tasted of alcohol. His chest seized with breath knowing what he’d have to say.
“I came close… to killing myself.”
Time’s arms wrapped tightly.
“Not tonight, the day before I met you all.” He didn’t dare meet the older’s gaze. “I’d just gotten done with my journey. I’d just returned home and had spent half a year trying to keep myself from breaking.” He choked back a pitiful laugh. “Something— something told me to hang out for one more day. To last a few hours more, and I was sure something would happen… Next morning who do I see but you knocking on my door asking about the hero.”
“Isn’t that funny?”
Time didn’t even smile as he gazed down. “What made you feel that way?”
“Why didn’t I? I had just seen the love of my life disappear. My purpose was over, and I couldn’t go back to my village and act as if I hadn’t saved the world. I was treated differently and I— I couldn’t stand the weird looks when I already felt like an outsider.”
The switch from the villiage’s ‘shared son’ to ‘hero’ had been jarring and left impressions on the people he considered his family.
They expected something from him, whether to decide ranch life wasn’t for him, or to settle down and marry the girl who could hardly remember past his name… he wasn’t sure.
He was left with a sense of longing for more. Another journey, more people to meet, but when he looked at the others and saw how much they’d lost Twilight felt selfish for wanting another meaning.
Why couldn’t he be happy with what he had?
It was hard to admit he felt this way for such dumb reasons but Time didn’t seem to think they were.
“I can see that. I was the same before I started helpin’ Malon on the ranch. I was just a kid so I didn’t realize the reality of what I lost and I tried for so long to find those missing pieces.” Something in his voice tensed.
“Then I married Malon and realized I didn’t need those missing pieces. I was filling the void they left.”
“But I don’t want to forget them.” His heart squeezed.
Time grimaced. “I never forgot them, Pup. I still think constantly of them, but when I think of what I’d lose to have those things back and I realize I’m better without them.” To gain that mother-figure would be to lose his wife and future family. He wouldn’t dare let this slip through his fingers.
This was only making him feel more shitty for his crying. “You don’t get it.”
“No… probably not, but I want to. Will you tell me?”
“I’ve done— I’ve don’ bad things. Bad things the people I love always leave me for.” He forced back the memories of his first home, of his second, of the woman he loved and the man he cherished like family.
Everyone leaves him behind.
Time mulled this over drawing him up into his arms and closer than ever to just rest his body over the younger to keep his boy from shaking.
“I promise I’ll never leave you.”
‘Bullshit.’ He answered back taking him into his arms thankful for just a moment of his vanity to have someone comfort him.
Too clingy, too arrogant, not good enough— no matter what there was always a reason to leave him and try as hard as he might, no matter what, he couldn’t fix those problems of his. The closest he had come was taking up his new identity in Ordon and throwing away his old life.
It was short lived when his journey was as quick, but now Twilight was at the age there was no do-over button.
“There was a time where I thought I could believe those words.”
Time rubbed his back silently.
“What can I do to prove that to you?”
Twilight met that bleak gaze and could see pure love in that response. Time’s own guilt pulling him down and making it harder.
Soon he’d be forgotten, in the shambles of a ruined grove, protecting what damned him to this half life curse full of regrets. Twilight could see Shade in the way Time moved, his actions, and even his words and to notice those small details could only break the hero's heart more in moments where Time would tell him nothing but the truth, but for someone who's seen the future of the man he knew those words meant nothing but falsehoods.
“Stop loving me. Stop caring, and wish I were dead. I’ll believe you then.”
Time stared wide eyed at him. Anger rising on his tongue but unable to form any actual sentence.
He simply raised his hand in response. The fine lines of scars and the rough callous of work with the little golden triangle printed neatly like a birthmark. “See? I’m still here. If you can’t hate me then I can’t trust you.”
“You want to disappear?”
“I suppose…” He drew flippantly. “It would’ve just been better if I wasn’t born.”
There, Twilight finally admitted it to himself, and aloud. If he wasn’t born the cycle wouldn’t have continued, Time wouldn’t have died regretfully, and Twilight wouldn’t be laden with guilt over all his misdeeds.
To disappear, to never exist, seemed to solve the answer to so many of Twilight's problems.
He knew Time wouldn’t feel the same, he just hadn’t expected such raw emotion from the man.
“Don’t you ever fucking say that again!”
Twilight jumped in sobriety. His head whipped to Time’s glare that made him shrink back. The anger hadn’t necessarily surprised him, but maybe the fact it wasn’t disappointment, but genuine grief in his mentor’s gaze that had him realizing what he’d admitted.
Time grabbed him. Pulling him tightly into a hug. The older man’s shoulders shook and if Twilight didn’t know better than he would’ve thought the man was crying for him.
“Don’t you ever wish you weren’t born,” Time’s voice choked and Twilight doubted himself. “You’re the best man I’ve ever met. I would regret every day waking up knowing you weren’t there with me.”
Time pressed his face into Twilight's hair. His head was brought down to rest on their shoulder. The hug felt suffocatingly tight, but Twilight didn’t fight it. Instead he feebly reached out, gripping onto the man’s shirt and feeling the warm stretch of muscles under his hands. Still giving life to the man that Twilight could only ever remember in ghostly form.
Twilight released a breathy gasp, not realizing how strained he’d been to even breathe.
“I— I can’t— Time, I can’t…” Tears pooled in his eyes. The realization of everything that’d escaped his drunken lips were now exposed, and Twilight couldn’t find the courage to not falter. He pressed his face closer into the man, nearly wishing he could bleed into the man so he couldn’t leave.
Twilight couldn’t handle his grief, just like Shade couldn’t contain his regrets. Broken promises only seemed to linger and one of them always wound up alone. There was no promising what couldn’t be kept and no fixing what would once again break—
“You have to. I won’t let you do anything stupid.” Time pulled his face up. He fought to meet the man’s gaze but upon seeing the love in his eyes he couldn’t help but be captivated by such loving eyes. “You're my boy, and I know it’s hard and I know it hurts, but if you leave me I’ll do something stupid too.”
Twilight knew better than to believe that threat, because Twilight wouldn’t be sitting in the man’s arms if Time would follow after Twilight in doing something ‘stupid,’ but what was a child supposed to do but trust his father? His teacher?
Shade was never wrong. Twilight ultimately believed that to be true, and maybe to his own detriment, Twilight would believe Time was too some benevolent man.
“Twilight, promise me you won’t do anything stupid— even after we all split you’ll find something for yourself and enjoy.” Time nearly shook him out of his lap.
“Twilight, promise me!”
He felt seventeen again, in that very moment, looking up to his ghostly mentor who raised his blade and commended attention. The man who, though influenced his life very little since the beginning, had left an impression more than skin deep.
Even in that skeletal gaze Twilight only saw warmth looking at the man, wondering silently what he did to earn such loving looks from a man who didn’t know him.
And just as stupidly as the boy who charged into danger with an unhelpful guide and a sword and shield on his back, he returned the man’s loving look.
“I promise,” he answered back solemnly.
Time didn’t look happy. He held Twilight close, hands circling around him till every inch of their bodies were touching.
The alcohol discarded to just instead lean back and stare up at the dark, star-filled sky. Twilight lay over Time, holding his mentor around his chest. Time was under him with his hands always seemingly shifting to hold Twilight everywhere at once.
A breath seized his chest, Twilight resting his head on Time. “I’m sorry.” He was not the man Shade wished him off to be.
To take courage and be well. Twilight had failed his mentor and once again his father. His only way to convey his grief was an apology.
“Don’t.” Time whispered against his ear. “Don’t you ever apologize for your pain. Nothing was ever your fault.”
Sourly, Twilight just couldn’t believe those words, but it was also almost then that Twilight nearly spilled his guts and history of the old man’s shade.
Instead, he placed his head down against the man’s beating chest. He listened to the blood pumping beneath his skin, the whole feeling of being alive— Twilight listened.
His hands tightened into the man’s shirt. Afraid if he closed his eyes he’d wake to holding the skeletal remains of the man tormented even in death.
“I wish…” the words died on his tongue just as quickly as he spoke. Too sober to not be aware of his own thoughts.
“You wish?” Time prompted wanting him to continue. If not to just hear his voice.
Twilight sighed. “I wish I was younger.” His words had a touch of airiness. “That or drunk so I wouldn’t be as embarrassed being held by you.” He tried to joke, to ignore everything.
Time could see past his lightheartedness for the pain that seeped so openly.
He brought his hand up, cupping Twilight's jaw and brought him forward to kiss his brow. “I’d hold you at any age. I’ll tell you I love you until both our deaths—“ ironic he had—“ and nothing will ever make me embarrassed to call you my son.”
“Go, and do not falter, my child!” Shade’s words echoed faintly behind Time’s.
Twilight smiled. “I know.” He answered.
He sat up and Time followed, still hazy in his own drunkenness. He reached for the leftover alcohol as Time grabbed his hand.
“You don’t need it.” Twilight figured he meant that for both of them.
“I just wanna taste a little. You said Malon made good drinks… I just want a taste.”
Time tensed realizing Twilight didn’t plan to get any drunker than they already were so he let his arm slip from his grasp as he poured just enough into a glass to get a good taste.
The taste was sweet over his lips, covering the taste of his own alcohol. It lingered over his tongue and tasted like memories.
Twilight held the glass between his hands protectively.
“It’s good, right?” Time asked softly, head placed on Twilight's shoulder watching him.
Thick tears swelled in Twilight's eyes. Blinking they fell to his lap with little control as his cheeks wetted. Time sat a little straighter to his sudden crying.
“I wish…” any other day Twilight wouldn’t have finished the sentence, but maybe it was the alcohol, maybe because he’d already said so much, or because the damn alcohol brought up memories of his youth, but he finished his sentence.
“I wish I could’ve had this.”
He’d never known his grandmother till meeting Time and only knew Time through his Shade. Twilight was not his son nor his grandson by a couple hundred years, but to him he felt like his father and mother and it ached in the deepest pit of his stomach to meet people so familiar yet distant.
He cried for the memories he’d made with them and the ones soon to come, all up to the day he’d have to leave them behind because unlike them, Twilight couldn’t be a part of their world.
Time’s hands squeezed him gently. “You can have a proper drink of it when we get to the farm… I’m sure Malon would love any compliments then. Think your praise would mean more to her than anything I could say.” He joked quietly.
He could gather quietly the alcohol wasn’t really what Twilight meant.
Twilight’s thumb rested on the rim of the glass. It swiped across the lip. His tongue rested heavy in his mouth with words he should never consider but the Lon Lon special was indeed strong and even a glass could have even the damnedest of words fall from Twilight's mouth.
“I wish I never had to go back to my time.” It was so painfully honest. “I could live with you and Ma.” It was an idea in his tender heart.
He turned to see Time’s opinion on the thought. He didn’t know what to make of that look however.
“Would you…” ‘want me?’ He seemed to ask silently. His eyes betrayed how much he wanted Time’s answer to be.
Instead, Time cupped his cheek. “You’d never have your own family. I could never ask you to leave behind everything for us. You’d have nothing.”
Twilight didn’t skip a beat. “I’d have you.”
“And I am nothing to the things you’d lose.” Time shook his head. “The things you’ve yet to gain.”
Twilight turned away, betrayed by those words. His own heart couldn’t take it.
“Twilight— Link.” Time forced his eyes back to him. “I love you too much to see you living in the past… take it from me when I say it’ll only hurt worse when it comes time.”
Twilight sat wordlessly.
Those words were meant to ease but it only proved Time’s double standard of pain when he himself lived in his regrets and the past. Where the man could be selfish and linger he wouldn’t allow Twilight.
He nearly scoffed if he didn’t think he’d earn another lecture.
Time’s arms wrapped back around him, tugging him back to the ground. The glass falling from Twilight's hands in the process.
“Now we get to stay out here longer.” Time smiled, brushing back Twilight's bangs.
Twilight didn’t complain, wrapping his arms around Time loosely. “It was good alcohol, tho…” he hummed, feeling another bout of warmth in his stomach and face. “Even though we weren’t sharing.” He said a little more shyly.
Time laughed proudly. “Ay it’s wonderful I married such a wonderful woman!”
“I’ll pay you back with a bottle.”
Time patted his shoulder roughly. “No need for tasteless shit,” Time giggled somehow more drunk now then before when actually drinking. “Mal’s stuff just doesn’t compare!”
“I’ll see if she won’t mind a couple’o drinks next time. If it’s fer you she won’t say no.” Time leaned over and kissed his brow. “She absolutely adores you, ‘n she used ta call me the favorite!” He frowned with a pout.
Something warm swelled in Twilight's chest.
The words were out his mouth before he could think. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Time didn’t skip a beat as he kissed him again. “I love you, and Malon, ‘n all them other boys so much, when we— when we split ways, I ain’t ever think a day’ll go by I ain’t thinkin’ of you.”
Twilight nodded and smiled, sharing that same feeling in his broken chest.
Maybe then, Twilight would think. When they’d go their separate ways and never see each other again till the years passed and people died, would Time understand Twilight's pain of always being reminded of the man. Lingering on thoughts of someone years away when your life should have no impact on theirs and somehow despite the odds your life makes up the very impression of their lives.
Maybe then, Time would understand Twilight’s pain.
And just, like he’d always promised, in life or death, he’d never be embarrassed to call Link his child.