Chapter Text

The calm before the storm

The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of them-selves, and wiser people so full of doubts. – Bertrand Russell

If you were to ask Jinzhou's citizens about the current General of the Midnight Rangers, what would they answer? That he was kind? Smart? Courageous? Powerful? Many would easily find a way to praise him, wholeheartedly believing that it was the truth.

Jiyan begged to differ.

He might be kind and he always tried to do his best but there were times when he couldn’t help but stare blankly at the desolated state of his surroundings and wonder if those songs about him should rather be unsung. Although he hadn’t met similar failure as the former generals yet, Jiyan never dared to see himself as superior - not even once. Especially in moments like these with unnerving quietness surrounding him like a suffocating iron blanket, he couldn’t help but wish for guidance. In mere minutes, he would have to stand up and lead his army into the final battle. Of course, he had planned a strategy with the help of his trusted men and Rover, the joker card in this showdown.

But would that be enough?

Would he really be able to lead his men who entrusted him with their lives through this cursed rain?

Blankly he stared up to the grey sky with raindrops falling on his face. They were cold and Jiyan couldn’t help but think of icy scalpel blades - those blades he used to operate on dozens of wounded soldiers during the last Retroact Rain.

Every night he could hear their screams full of anguish and pain…

He swore to never repeat the gruesome battle General Geshu Lin led back then. But was this thought just his naivete?

In his mind he could hear the sharp and merciless words of his former General:

"Your attitude will not save these men. You may think of yourself as merciful but in reality, you are gambling with their lives. No, not only theirs but those of their wives and children. Do you really want to bear this sin on your shoulders?"

No.

He did not.

He does not.

But what choice was there to make? Back then, he did not want to follow his general’s words but had to until he was no more and now - now he wasn't even sure if his own words were worth following. Jiyan couldn’t help but close his eyes for a moment and let his head fall into his hands.  He knew that there was no way to escape reality, even for just a moment, but he still tried.

That was when he heard a quiet rustle and a raspy, painfully known voice mocked him:

"Such a pitiful expression, General. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?"

Jiyan did not look up. He knew that it wouldn’t make a difference as it was just another creation of the Retroact Rain. Just like all the other illusion screaming at him to help them, to save them. Maybe it would just go away if he ignored it long enough. Didn't work the last few dozen times but it was worth the try as those fights were always exhausting - physically and even more so mentally.

The rainfall got heavier and Jiyan was thoroughly drenched. It was as if the sky had heard his pleas and drenched out every sound that had tortured Jiyan.

Sometimes Jiyan wished the world would just stay silent.

Suddenly he felt a hand grabbing his clothes near the neck. His tacet mark immediately stung as if it would resonate with... something. He rapidly looked up and couldn’t help but flinch when confronted with yellow eyes not even a hand’s length away from his own. 

He had always been way too close to people's faces...

"Ignoring your general, I see. Your manners are as trashy as always. I did not teach you to disrespect your elders."
"But you aren’t." Jiyan spat out while trying to escape his grasp but the other didn’t relent.
"Huh?"

A spark of anger ignited Jiyan’s lung and his eyes stung.
"I only respect General Geshu Lin, not a creature who imitates him. Not a mere reflection. Go away." Jiyan elaborated cooly and finally got the other to back off.

The whitehaired man looked at him with an unreadable expression on his face.  Jiyan expected a fight as it was the most common ending of their meetings in the Retroact Rain, but this time was different. Instead, the other just stood up and looked at him silently. Jiyan thought he had seen a fleeting softness in his eyes, but he knew that it was all his imagination.

"Stand firm, Jiyan. I chose you for a reason. So do not disappoint me."

And before he could react, a hand softly petted his hair once before the imitation of his former General dispersed in the wind. His mind raced nearly as fast as his heart was beating. What was that? This had been highly different from their former meetings and Jiyan was left shellshocked. Why did the illusion behave this way? This ... softness… closeness was not founded on the real General Geshu Lin - at least to the knowledge of Jiyan. He had always hated when Jiyan had shown his weakness. So, what caused this discrepancy?

Was it wishful thinking on his part which manifested in form of this screwed illusion?

Pathetic.  

Confused Jiyan slowly stood up still trying to process what just happened. But with Rover arriving just mere seconds later, he had no other choice but focus on the upcoming battle.

A single white chrysanthemum stood at the side of the stone block Jiyan just sat on, swaying resiliently in the wind as if it wanted to defy the thousand raindroplets coming its way.

Hi there! I’m new here so bear with my awful formatting and syntax as I neither can call English my mother tongue nor do I have a beta reader. Furthermore I haven’t written in several years (and those fanfictions were not in English) so I will be rusty. But I promise you a slow burn romance with an already well thought out plot. I am a sucker for slowburn, enemies to lovers, angst and psychological twists so you know what to expect. And I love quotes as you maybe noticed. Updates will be at least weekly maybe more. The canon foundation is quite small, but we will make it work.  So, get yourself some snacks and enjoy the ride! ;)

( I just lost my 50:50 on Yinlins banner so I can fuel enough sadness for days into this fic -.-)

Edit after recent events: I do not want my story to be used for any kind of AI training.