Work Text:
HEY.
sup
CAN YOU- YOU SEE THIS.
the bottom of your laptop
interesting stuff
what about it
I NEED TO PUT IT SOMEWHERE!!!
then do that
what do you need my input for
WELL, WHERE I WOULD TYPICALLY PUT IT YOU ARE OCCUPYING WITH YOUR HEAD!!
i was here first
youre seriously gonna kick me off
YES.
YOURE HALF ASLEEP ANYWAYS! I WANNA WATCH A MOVIE.
then use the tv
im comfy
WHAT IS SO DIFFICULT ABOUT IT?
REMOVE YOUR HEAD FROM MY LAP.
SIMPLE!
no man ive claimed this spot
IT’S MY LAP???
and? i dont see you laying on it
YOU DON’T SEE ME LAYING ON MY OWN LAP? MAYBE BECAUSE IT’S MY OWN FUCKING LAP!!
MOVE!
WHY DO YOU CARE ANYWAYS IF YOU’RE ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP?
i dont care
just comfy
WHATEVER.
YOU CAN ALSO BE PERFECTLY FUCKING COMFORTABLE ON A PILLOW.
maybe
.. SO MOVE???
WHY ARE YOU STILL LAYING ON ME??
. . .
DON’T PRETEND YOU FELL ASLEEP.
I CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR BULLSHIT.
WHY CAN I NOT JUST WATCH A MOVIE??
you can
you can watch all the shit romcoms your little alien heart can desire
im just comfy right now
SO THEN I CAN’T.
you can
YOUR HEAD IS CURRENTLY OCCUPYING THE SPOT WHICH I NORMALLY WOULD PLACE MY LAPTOP.
SO MOVE AND LET ME WATCH THE MOVIE.
but
DAVE.
I DON’T UNDERSTAND THE ISSUE HERE.
me either
put the laptop somewhere else
ive rightfully gotten here first
laptop shouldve came out sooner
but you waited until i was almost asleep
we also watched a movie on the tv earlier
so why dont you just do the same now
AGAIN. THIS IS MY LAP. YOU JUST HAPPEN TO BE LAYING ON IT. IT IS STILL CONNECTED TO ME.
AND I HAVE MORE MOVIES OPTIONS ON MY LAPTOP.
ok ok
i have a proposal
WHAT?
if youre really insisting i move
I AM.
let me fall asleep first
so theres a chance i dont wake up
and i can comfortably fall asleep
boom
WHATEVER. JUST FALL ASLEEP NOW AND FAST.
fine
. . .
. . .
hey karkat
DAVE.
i know i know im tired
just
i like you
and are you playing with my hair
OK.
I TOLERATE YOU.
AND.. IS IT MAKING YOU FALL ASLEEP ANY FASTER?
yeah
and ouch im wounded
im merely tolerable by your standards
HEY, THAT’S MORE THAN MOST PEOPLE.
YOU THINK I’D PUT UP WITH THIS SHIT IF IT WAS ANYONE ELSE?
hey karkat
DAVE.
what about a little goodnight smooch
OH MY FUCK.
WOULD IT, AND I MEAN WOULD IT REALLY, HELP YOU FALL ASLEEP FASTER.
you never know until you try
IS THIS HINTING AT SOMETHING..?
LAYING ON ME, TELLING ME YOU LIKE ME, AND NOW ASKING FOR A KISS.
IT WOULDN’T BE TOO MUCH OF A STRETCH TO GUESS THERE ARE FEELINGS THERE.
OR IS THIS SOMETHING TOTALLY NORMAL TO HUMANS BY DAVE STRIDER STANDARD.
wouldnt call it normal
and i see where youre coming from
but man im comfy
cant a guy be comfy by laying on another guy
APPARENTLY NOT TO HUMANS.
fair
you got us there
bullseye shot to the target
nobodies ever gotten a higher score
the crowds watching in anticipation
opponents are seething with rage
and
DAVE.
SLEEP.
YOU HAVEN’T CONFIRMED OR DENIED FEELINGS YET.
do i have to confirm or deny
NOT NECESSARILY BUT IT WOULD HELP ME UNDERSTAND JUST WHAT YOU THINK OF A GOODNIGHT KISS FROM ME IS.
ok well
i guess
i didnt think much about it
but i want you specifically to kiss me
like nobody else
i dont know if its because of the meteor
or because i like you a lot
like in a more than bro way
id need to ponder on that one more
the kiss might help me figure out
but i already got what i want so i can survive without it
im already comfy as
. . .
oh ok that was just
no warning or anything just
kiss
WHATEVER. IF IT’LL SHUT YOU UP FASTER I’M DOWN.
DID IT HELP AT ALL?
right uh yeah
that was nice
nicer than i expected
not a dig at you
more the way it made me feel
like sick but in a good way
feels romantic enough to me
that sorta feeling isnt one typically associated with a goodnight kiss from the homies
SO..??
yeah its weird
i think i like you
in that way
OK. COOL.
WHATEVER IT IS CAN YOU FALL ASLEEP ALREADY WE’LL TALK IN THE MORNING.
I WANT TO WATCH MY MOVIE NOW.
right uh well
goodni-
DO YOU WANT ANOTHER KISS?
what
i mean sort of but why
HMM. DON’T KNOW. FEELING EXTRA GENEROUS TONIGHT. GO TO SLEEP.
ok cool then sure
. . .
. . .
GOODNIGHT, DAVE.
night bro