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“Hey! Stop that at once!”
Octavius yelled demands at the squirrel dragging him away, frantically waving his arms to grasp at anything in his reach. He went off screaming about how he was a Roman general with rights and how he’d never imagine himself being overpowered by a rodent.
Yet, in all his complaining, Octavius didn’t mind these threats when it came to rescuing Jedediah. He was his best friend, after all, even if his decision to risk his life was incredibly stupid. Octavius decided not to think about it now. For all he knew, he could’ve risked his own with this mission too.
Eventually, after wrestling the squirrel for a good few minutes, Octavius found himself high up in a tree. He was able to break away from the squirrel’s grasp, but as he backed away from it, the branch he was sitting on became thinner and thinner. A fall from this height would kill him, Octavius anxiously concluded, so he stayed put, locking eyes with the slowly approaching squirrel.
Just as the creature came close enough to attack, a swift arrow hit it in the head, knocking it backwards off of the tree. Octavius let out a sigh, not sure whether to celebrate his safety or cringe at the squirrel’s untimely fate. But where did the arrow come from?
“Hey, little man!”
A voice from behind caught Octavius off guard. He swiftly turned and unsheathed his sword, holding it out in front of him.
“I refuse to meet that same fate without a fight!” Octavius yelped at the floating cherubs in front of him, which now had scared looks on their faces. Seeing their discomfort, he lowered his weapon. “Oh. Uh… Sorry.”
“We’re not here to hurt you, friend.” the cherub in the front assured him.
Octavius just stared at them, their fluttering angel wings and baby-like expressions. It was hard for him to believe how badly they massacred that squirrel.
“Okay. You just… killed that squirrel, and I-”
“‘Killed’? Oh, heavens, no!” the cherub with the harp floated closer, shaking his head. “Don’t be stupid! We’re cupids: experts in the power of love!”
“The squirrel isn’t dead, dear friend.” the third cherub chimed in. “See for yourself!” He pointed at the base of the tree, Octavius following his gaze.
The squirrel was miraculously alive, eagerly climbing up the tree again with a certain excitement Octavius didn’t see before. When it reached the top of the tree, the Roman general barely had time to panic before it licked his face.
“Oh, so you hit it with your… love arrows?” Octavius still seemed puzzled as he began to pet the squirrel. The cherubs nodded in unison, goofy smiles plastered on their stone faces.
“Well, thank you,” Octavius said to them, mounting the tamed squirrel, “but I have a mission to return to. Onward!” He reared the creature onto its hind legs, then had it race down the tree in the direction of the Lincoln Memorial. Little did he know that the cupids were following close behind.
When Octavius made it to the large fountain in the center of the field, he sat nearby while his squirrel drank water. With a sigh, he dangled his legs over the edge of the fountain, staring at his reflection. It was nice having this quiet time to himself, especially considering the chaos he had endured as of late.
Ever since Octavius arrived at the Smithsonian, things moved faster and more sporadically than he liked. He was a man of order, after all. Adjusting to the unpredictability of these new adventures was difficult.
That’s why he liked having Jedediah around. Of course, Octavius valued everything about his friend, but the cowboy always had a certain knack for living in the moment. He made quick decisions without thinking and woke up every night without a plan.
At first, these traits were infuriating to Octavius, coming from a background so orderly and thought-out. The more time he spent with Jed, however, the more he found himself craving new experiences, new ways of thinking and living that he never even thought of trying out before. Thus, a lot of the things the two did together were Jed’s ideas, such as spinning in the toy car until they felt sick, only to hop in and do it again a few hours later.
Sometimes, Octavius wondered what would happen if he were the one to choose an activity. It would definitely be more relaxing. Perhaps a leisurely stroll around the Roman diorama? Jedediah probably wouldn’t find that interesting, Octavius realized, but maybe it’d lead to some conversation. Maybe, just maybe it would give him the chance to tell the cowboy how he really felt.
Once again, he pushed these thoughts to the back of his brain. It was tempting to waste time daydreaming about nonsense, nonsense that mattered so much to him. But with Jedediah’s life on the line, Octavius decided that was more important, even if he thought his friend would never feel the same.
Just when he decided to get up and continue his journey, he was quickly made aware of the cupids sitting in front of him, observing him with sly smiles. Octavius knew what they were thinking, but he kept his composure.
“So, this mission you’re on… What’s it all about?” one of the cherubs asked, following him as he continued towards the Lincoln Memorial.
“I’m saving my friend, Jedediah,” Octavius answered honestly yet briefly. “He got captured.”
“And you like him?”
“Yes, I do. He’s my best friend.” Octavius said what he could to hopefully shoo the cupids away. Love was not the main focus right now.
“Like, ‘like-like’?” The cherubs continued to trail behind, each question they spewed out becoming more nosy by the minute. Octavius could feel his patience running low.
“It doesn’t matter,” he cut in after a sharp inhale. “Look, I’m on a mission to save somebody. Love isn’t… Your love powers can’t help me right now.”
The cherubs were grinning ear to ear. He hadn’t said ‘no’ to their question.
“If you need help confessing, I think a love arrow would be perfect!” one of them replied.
Octavius let out a sigh. Those stupid cupids. They couldn’t understand that their goofy ways weren’t helpful. This was a life or death situation. Their romantic harp songs and awful baby-talk were only adding on to the stress.
While they continued discussing ways to confess to Jedediah, Octavius took the time he had to escape. He couldn’t stand their nonsense anymore.
The squirrel finally skidded to a halt at the front of the Lincoln Memorial, but to Octavius’ horror, the trustworthy man he hoped to see wasn’t there. While he anxiously pondered where a statue that big would even run off to, a terrible realization crept its way to his mind, striking him at the worst moment. If he didn’t find Abraham Lincoln in time, his whole plan would be foiled. He wouldn’t be able to save Larry and the others, but worst of all, Jedediah would be left to die.
Octavius found himself sitting on the ground, his face buried in his hands. His faith and hope had vanished so quickly.
“I’m so sorry, Jedediah,” he whispered.
Octavius could practically see his friend’s face in his mind, sporting that wide smile of his. He hoped that wasn’t the last time he would see it.
“I wish I could be there to save you.” He sniffed, wiping a stray tear from his cheek. “I wish you were here with me instead. That would be much easier!”
“Why did you sacrifice yourself like that? I could’ve helped you fight them off!” Octavius let out a weak laugh. “If you had let me help, we wouldn’t be in this mess! Then maybe I’d be able to… Maybe I could’ve let you know how much I love you!” Octavius chuckled again, tears now fully coating his face.
“I’d love to just risk it all and tell you how I feel,” he wept, “but one small mistake and we’re back to where we started, as enemies. Well, I did enjoy the fights, but I’d much prefer to hold your hand instead of a sword.” He paused for a moment, glancing down at his own hand.
“I pray that you feel the same, Jedediah.” Octavius lowered his voice to a whisper, clasping his hands together while he looked at the twinkling stars above him. He sighed. “Well, knowing you, it won’t be long until you come up to me talking about some sweet woman from your diorama.”
“You just have to meet her, Ockie!” Octavius said in Jed’s voice, feeling heartbroken but still mustering a laugh.
He went back to his original voice, giggling.
“No matter how many times I make fun of your cowboy terminology, my friend, I truly love your voice. I love your voice, and your hair, and those wonderfully enchanting blue eyes of yours!”
While he sobbed and laughed, the cupids made themselves visible and began to sing.
“Near… Far… Wherever you-”
“Please… Stop.” Octavius cut them off, holding up his hand. “I have a headache.”
The cupids fell silent, awkwardly glancing at each other.
Just then, booming footsteps echoed throughout the quiet memorial, and then Abraham Lincoln appeared, clutching a bundle of flowers in his hand.
“Oh, did you need me?” His gaze awkwardly fell over the giddy cupids and the giggling yet teary-eyed Roman general. “I was just picking flowers outside since I’ve never stood up from this chair before. And, I cannot lie, these are the most beautiful flowers I’ve ever seen!”
“Mr. President, sir, I am in need of your assistance,” Octavius told Abraham Lincoln. The large man let him climb into his hand.
“Wow, you are very small! Even smaller than that night guard that came through here earlier,” the president replied bluntly.
“Larry Daley?” Octavius’ eyes widened. “He’s my friend! We’re both from New York, and we need your help.”
“Well, I thought so! There were some angry people chasing him around earlier. What do you need?”
“Those soldiers have my allies trapped, and they’re guarding the cage. I need you to break through the building they’re in and scare them off. This will be both for the safety of this museum and the world.”
“Well, if the world is in danger, and since you’re far too incapable of fighting off those people,” Abraham Lincoln said while Octavius crossed his arms, “then I’ll do it!”
“Thank you very much, sir!” Octavius held his fist to his chest. “My best friend, Jedediah, is trapped as well, and it means a lot that you’ll help us out.” He noticed the sudden emotion in his voice, and scolded himself under his breath when Lincoln reacted to his statement.
“Is it just me, or is the tiny Roman general deeply in love with this ‘Jedediah’?” he asked rather loudly, turning to the cupids. The gods of love nodded and smiled excitedly while Octavius let out a small, frustrated exhale. He opened his mouth to speak, but the distracted statues continued to chat.
“Wait, he hasn’t even confessed yet?” Lincoln looked shocked, his mouth agape.
“I know, right?” The first cherub replied. He threw his arms up in exasperation. “He may be little, but he has to step up and be a big man for once!”
“Okay, that’s a bit offensive…” Octavius scoffed, rolling his eyes dramatically.
“Are we wrong?” was the cupid’s sassy response.
“Come on, everyone!” the not-so-big general raised his voice at last. “If we continue to waste time, there will be no Jedediah to confess to!”
The statues glanced at each other, and after taking way too long to decide, they stood up and followed Octavius, who was already getting a head start with his squirrel. Abraham Lincoln approached him.
“Take a flower, little general.” He leaned down and had the squirrel hold the plant in its mouth. “Maybe it’ll help you out!”
Octavius smiled a bit as he looked down at the flower, a lovely yellow daisy. He wasn’t expecting this much support from the Smithsonian exhibits, but he was beginning to have hope. Maybe a little confession wouldn’t be so bad.
When entering the battlefield, however, it felt as if there was no time to confess anything. In the midst of chaos and confusion, Octavius desperately searched the crowd for Jedediah. It was hard to see anything with all of the commotion. Opposing forces clashed together, and stronger warriors knocked their weaker foes to the ground. Octavius did his best to guide his squirrel through the frenzy. He could see faces he knew flashing by, now scrunched in anger, but not once did he see Jed.
There eventually came a time where Larry tripped and dropped an hourglass, and at the sight of a familiar cowboy hat jostling in the sand, Octavius felt his heart sink. How long was his friend sitting in there, awaiting his death? He had the squirrel bolt towards the discarded hourglass, praying to see Jed’s smile or at least a glint of relief in his eyes. Instead, he looked quite hopeless. It tore Octavius’ heart apart to see the cowboy sadly smiling at him with sand going up to his neck.
“Jedediah, they need us!” Octavius found his hands reaching for the glass, contemplating how to break it open. But Jedediah wasn’t convinced he was going to make it.
“I’m afraid this cowboy’s been to his last hoedown,” he replied, still managing a slight smile.
“Octavius, remember me as I was, wild, and free, and-”
“No need for final words.”
“I’m not finished yet,” Jedediah quickly cut in. “I want to get to the story of our relationship, the evolution from enemies to friends.”
“No!”
“It’ll make you cry!”
“No!” Octavius yelled back, his hands going to his helmet. “Because you are going to live!”
Before Jed could reply, Octavius smashed the helmet into the hourglass, shattering the barrier between them. Sand then began to spill out from the crack, Jed following close behind. Octavius helped his friend stand up and noted the feeling of their clasped hands. It was wonderful. He loved it so much that as Jed walked away to grab a weapon, Octavius got dragged along with him, completely forgetting to let go.
“Um, Ockie?” Jedediah muttered. “I don’t need to be monitored, ya know. I know I almost died in an hourglass, but-”
“Oh, no! It’s not that.” Octavius told him. His words were jumbling together so fast. If Jed didn’t think something was up then, he would now.
“Then what is it?” Jedediah sounded both confused and concerned. Octavius met his friend’s gaze, refusing to keep him waiting any longer. Presenting the yellow daisy, he finally put his thoughts into words after who knows how long…
“I wish I could’ve told you this long ago. I wish it didn’t take 50 years and countless fights for me to realize this. Even when we were sworn enemies…” Octavius paused, drawing a breath for courage. “Jedediah, I’m in love with you.”
Jed’s face went blank for a moment, a little too long as far as Octavius was concerned. Then, like the click of a switch, he broke into a smile. He immediately wrapped Octavius in his arms, picking him up to the best of his ability and twirling him around. He was cheering and whooping, so much so that the fighting seemed to settle down. All eyes were on the miniatures wrapped in a warm embrace.
“Dang, yer armor’s heavy!” Jedediah commented, setting Octavius down with an exaggerated grunt.
“That’s the first thing you’re going to say to me?” Octavius found himself laughing. “I haven’t even gotten a clear answer yet!”
As quickly as he finished his sentence, Jed swooped in and kissed him, pulling away just to say the snarky comment he’d been rehearing in his head,
“Is that a good enough answer for ya?”
Octavius came back to his senses, his head still reeling.
“Yes,” was all he said.
Jedediah smirked, then turned to the crowd of exhibits watching them and yelled,
“Don’t think I can’t see y’all! Go on, now!”
Most of the bystanders turned and left, but the cupids stayed behind with their silly grins. Octavius noticed them and called them over.
“Thank you, by the way,” he said, “for helping me process my feelings.” The cherubs simply smiled, ignoring Octavius and instead focusing on how cute he and Jed were together. Octavius sighed and shook his head. Those stupid cupids. They would never learn.
