Work Text:
The day of the first snow
-Prologue-
"Shoot!" Chris cursed, running out of the nursery and into the bathroom, passing Lex. A second later, she ran out of the bathroom and into the nursery again.
"Angel, what is it?" She hadn't Lex noticed following her into the nursery but was focused on her daughter.
"Shoot! Shoot, shoot!"
"Chris, what is it? Is she alright?" Lex grabbed her by the shoulders and made her look at him. "Is Hannah alright?"
"She's a bit feverish."
He let her go and turned to leave. "I'll call the doctor."
"Hon, don't! There's no need. It's only a bit over 100°F. She doesn't need a doctor yet. Likely, she won't need a doctor at all," Chris hastened to add and smiled at him.
"Are you sure?"
She nodded and sighed. "I just… I can't leave for Miami now, can I?! I know, those contract negotiations are important to you, but…"
Lex looked at their daughter for a moment and then back at Chris. "She'll be fine?"
"Of course, she will. She has your genes, but… I'm her mommy; I can't leave her alone."
He closed his eyes and massaged the root of his nose between thumb and index finger before he looked at her again.
"Then, I have to go myself. You give me your records, though?!"
"Of course, but --"
"And, hourly updates on Hannah?"
"Sure, but --"
"And, a bit of your charm?"
Chris rolled her eyes at him. "That, you won't need. – Do you really want to go?"
Lex sighed and shook his head, walking over to his daughter and brushed his knuckles against her cheek. "No, but this deal is really important."
Chris nodded. She knew it was important, otherwise Lex wouldn't have asked her to work as his attorney on this deal and would have stuck to his regular ones.
Slowly, she moved over to him and kissed the top of his head.
"I pack your stuff then, so you can be a bit longer with Hannah. And, I'm gonna write down some extra notes. – I'm sorry."
"Don't be. You're right: you are her mommy and she certainly needs you a bit more than me right now."
Again, Chris rolled her eyes at him and left the room to pack his bag. She hurried since the private jet would set off in about an hour and the first meeting with the business partner was set up for this afternoon. She hated to be late, and she didn't want Lex to be late, either. After all, punctuality was something really important to that business partner..
"Mr. German train... only worse," Chris mumbled as she scribbled down some extra notes for Lex. He'd be worried enough about Hannah, but she didn't want him to be unprepared.
At about thirty minutes later she kissed Lex goodbye.
"We could come with you," she mumbled but Lex shook his head.
"Hannah needs to stay in bed. And, I was serious about the hourly updates on her," he added.
"You'll get half-hourly updates."
"Good wife. Give her a kiss from me when she wakes up, will you?!"
Chris nodded and kissed him again. "I love you!"
"Of course, you do," Lex smiled and left.
Sighing, Chris walked back into the nursery and sat down on the old couch that once belonged to her mother and that Lex had upholstered for her. She took a book from a little table sitting next to the couch, and began to read it out loud to Hannah. It was The Cat in the Hat, and normally Lex would read it to Hannah, but now it was on Chris.
At about two hours later the doorbell rang. Hannah was still sleeping but she was getting better, and Chris hurried to open the door.
Keith Morris, her best friend for ages, stood outside, accompanied by two important looking guys. Chris knitted her brows as he watched her seriously.
"Chris, we need to talk about Lex."
-Christmas Eve-
Lex woke up as he felt a cool draft stroking his face. Sleepily, he opened one eye and checked the mattress next to him – it was abandoned.
He sat up, yawning, and looked around. The French windows stood white open and in the pale moonlight he saw the silhouette of a woman, dressed in a sleeveless top and loose boxer shorts. He shook his head.
"For Pete's sake…"
Yawning once more, he climbed out of bed, grabbed his bathrobe, and moved out of the bedroom onto the balcony.
"Angel, have you lost your mind? It's freezing out here!"
"Close your eyes and breathe!"
Lex stared at her, his brows raised.
"I'm perfectly capable to breathe with my eyes open -- "
"Close your eyes and inhale!" She turned her head and smiled at him. "We'll have white Christmas."
"I doubt that, Chris," Lex replied and put his bathrobe around her shoulders. "But, you'll have a cold for Christmas."
Chris chuckled and breathed in deeply. "I'm never sick on Christmas. It's the best time of the year and I never get sick then. Especially not when there's snow! Snow is magical, my friend."
"And, you're turning into a human popsicle; a lunatic one, obviously." Gently, but determined, he grabbed her by the shoulders and steered her back inside.
"You don't believe me 'bout the snow, eh?!" Chris watched him amused and made a face at him. "You're gonna feel really stupid by tomorrow."
"I already do. After all, I'm willingly spending my time with a nut job like you," Lex mumbled, smirking, and climbed back into bed.
"Trust me: there'll be snow. I can smell it. It smells like snow, and we'll have the perfect Christmas."
She was excited like a little child and Lex shook his head as he wrapped his arms around her and pulled the comforter over both of them. "Go back to sleep. It's gonna be a long day!"
"You're such a spoilsport!"
"Yeah, a tired one… Sleep!"
*
Chris woke up, shivering, and immediately looked around, checking the mattress next to her. It was empty. Of course, it was empty. This wasn't even her bed but the one in the little apartment above the Talon.
She bit her lips and tried hard not to cry. Four months had passed since she had talked to Lex the last time, since she had seen him the last time, since anyone had seen him the last time.
Three weeks ago he had been declared dead. Two days later Lionel had set up a fake funeral, pretending to grieve about his son and three hours after that farce he had Chris thrown out of the mansion, calling her a Black Widow, accusing her of being responsible for the plane crash that allegedly had killed Lex.
"You godforsaken motherf…" Chris clenched her fist and hit the mattress. She knew Lionel was responsible for the plane crash. After all, it would have been her sitting in the plane if Hannah hadn't gotten sick and Lex hadn't taken her place instead. She should be missing now, she should have been declared dead, not Lex. She…
There was a knock at the door, and Chris took a deep breath, grabbing a shirt – Lex's shirt – from the foot of the bed, slid into it and stood up to open the door. It was Lana, carrying a tray with coffee and some bagels.
"I thought you might want to have some breakfast," she said, smiling and entering as Chris stepped aside.
"You really don't need to do that," Chris said quietly. "It's enough that you let us stay here --"
"Half of this belongs to you and Hannah now, and Lex would… You dreamt of him again, didn't you?!"
Chris didn't answer. She couldn't. Everyone seemed to be so convinced that Lex was dead while she still hoped he was alive. In fact, she could feel it. She knew he was alive, somewhere, anywhere; certainly fighting amnesia or anything else that detained him from being with his family, at Christmas. He wasn't dead, he couldn't be...
"I can't believe Lionel kicked you out of the mansion," Lana continued. "And, now he's fighting Lex's last will?"
"Don't worry, you're gonna keep the Talon," Chris mumbled, sipping at the coffee. "He's only fighting those parts concerning me and Hannah. Well, mostly concerning me... That's good coffee!"
"But, he can't! You're Lex's wife, and Hannah's his daughter, and --"
"Trust me, he can. He has done worse things. In fact, this is likely the most humanitarian thing he's ever done. He --"
The cries of a baby stopped her from speaking and immediately Chris stood up to get her seven months old daughter.
"Morning, cookie. 'S alright… Mommy's here. And, Lana's here, too. Yeah, you want your breakfast now, don't you?!"
"Mashed bananas?" Lana asked, grinning and pointed at a bowl on her tray.
Chris smiled at her.
"You've got wings, Lana. Seriously, I wouldn't know what to do without you, or Clark, or the rest of you scoobies."
Clark sat at the kitchen's table and poked in his porridge, rather listlessly. He thought about Lex and Chris and little Hannah who had to grow up without a father now. He sighed heavily. It was his fault. All of this was his fault!
He had heard Lionel bribing the pilot to provoke a crash in order to kill Chris. He had heard that Lex would take the plane instead of Chris, and yet, he hadn't done anything to save his friend.
"I can't look at this anymore!" Jonathan said and took away the bowl of porridge. "Stop blaming yourself, son. You can't change what's happened!"
"I should've! I should've saved Lex! I should've stopped him from getting into that plane. If only I would've been a bit faster –"
"And, what would you have said? How would you have explained to Lex that his father bribed the pilot in order to kill Chris? And, how would you've explained that you knew about Hannah being sick, and that Lex would take the plane?" Jonathan patted his shoulder. "You've done everything humanly possible. --"
"But, I'm not even human! I should've done more!"
"You've searched half the planet for Lex --"
"Maybe, I've searched the wrong half…"
"Chris has searched the other half. There's no sign of Lex, and we need to face the truth: he's gone, son, and blaming yourself, or starving yourself won't bring him back."
Clark shook his head, unwilling to believe Lex was dead. He couldn't be. It was impossible. Not Lex who became so cheerful and who had blossomed in his new fatherhood. There was so much he wanted to do in his life, so many goals he wanted to reach; he couldn't be gone!
"But, it's my fault that Hannah has to grow up without a father now."
Jonathan sighed and for a moment Clark thought he would say it was better for the little girl not to be raised by a Luthor but to his great surprise his father was silent.
"She has a great godfather who will pick her and her mother up now, and bring them here." His mother had entered the kitchen and looked at him sternly. "Hurry, the General will be here soon, too."
Again, Clark shook his head. "I doubt Chris is in the mood to celebrate Christmas. And, to be honest, neither am I."
"Still, you pick them up now. We can't leave them alone. Not now, after Lionel showed his real face and threw them both out of their home. Seriously, so short before Christmas, after Chris has become a widow and Hannah an half-orphan." Angrily, she took a knife out of a drawer and grabbed for a bowl of potatoes.
"What kind of person is he?! Ugh, I'd love to have five minutes with him alone! Just five minutes telling him what I think of him!" She began to peel and chop the potatoes, angrily, and Jonathan glanced at Clark.
"You better do as your mother says. Besides, she's right. I'm sure Lex would want us to look after Chris and Hannah."
When Clark entered the Talon he found the cafe crowded. Admittedly, he was surprised. One should think on Christmas Eve people were at home, decorating the Christmas tree and preparing dinner instead of spending their time in a cafe.
"Last minute shoppers," Lana grinned as she walked by and served a young couple, sitting in a niche, surrounded by several bags. "You coming to pick up Chris?"
Clark nodded slowly. "Have you talked to her already?"
"Yeah, well… I tried. It's difficult to get through to her. Sometimes, she reminds me a lot of Lex... She's acting tough. She'd be worse without Hannah, though."
"Yeah, it's good she has the little one… " Clark mumbled and stared at the stairs. He remembered Chris and Lex's wedding. A year ago, exactly a week before Christmas, they had gotten married, and he still remembered how nervous Lex had been then. And, how excited. Chris had already been pregnant, and Clark had been Lex's best man. It seemed to be a lifetime ago.
"They're lucky to have someone like you," Lana said and flashed him a smile. "You're really someone to rely on."
Clark forced himself to return her smile, though he didn't feel like it at all. He should've stopped Lex from entering that plane. If only he had been two minutes faster…
"Well, I'm quite busy here, Clark. See you tonight, then," Lana said and hurried over to another table.
Clark took a deep breath and slowly walked upstairs to the small apartment. The door stood ajar and he could hear Chris talking quietly; obviously to Hannah.
"Did I ever told you about the first Christmas I had with Daddy? It was wonderful, and so not planned." Clark heard her chuckling.
"I wanted to celebrate with your Grandpa but there was this huge snowstorm, and he couldn't come because he had to help all those people that have been snowed in, but your daddy was there and we celebrated at home. There was no Christmas decorations at all since Daddy wasn't a fan of Christmas then, but he changed. He set up the biggest Christmas tree I've ever seen, and he decorated the whole mansion with fir branches and red ribbons, and candy canes… Santa's house at the north pole certainly didn't look better. We had a lovely Christmas Eve. We read out to each other and cuddled and… did things I'm telling you in eighteen years – and when Uncle Clark isn't standing in the door frame."
Clark blushed and opened the door to step in. "How did you… ? I didn't mean to…"
"Clark, you smell like farm – in this good, healthy way," Chris added hastily and smiled. "Come on in."
"I… How are you?"
But, before Chris could answer her cell phone rang, and she pushed Hannah into Clark's arms answering the call.
"Hello, little one. How are you? Keeping your mommy busy? That's a good thing. That's a really good thing..." He rocked Hannah a bit in his arms and let her play with his fingers.
"She's thinking a lot of your daddy these days, isn't she?! I think of him, too. You're lucky, actually. You're way too small as if you could understand what's really going on." He sighed and looked at Hannah. She had her father's blue eyes, and his nose, and even his piercing look. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry... You should've spent more time with him. You made him so happy..."
"They can't all have a family!? What's with those that joined the armed forces to escape their crazy families?"
Clark turned around and looked at Chris who was shouting into her cell phone.
"I don't give a shit about that, Sam! As long as I don't see Lex's decaying corpse in front of me I'll keep on searching. – Well, it's none of your business what I do with my mother's legacy." Her voice changed and she began to beg. "Please, find me some volunteers. Or Jews, or Muslims. Anyone that isn't into Christmas… – Thank you, Sam. Thank you so much! – And, to you, too. Say hello to Lois and Lucy for me. Bye!"
She put the cell onto the table and breathed in deeply, before she turned around to face Clark again.
"That was Chloe's uncle!?"
Chris nodded. "It's really great to know two generals that are willing to bend the rules," she said and forced herself into a laugh.
Clark nodded. General Lane and Generals Harris, Chris' father, had both agreed to assign a few of their soldiers in order to search Lex. And, by contrast with Lionel, Chris wouldn't give up her search for Lex. Though, admittedly, Clark doubted Lionel had looked for Lex at all.
However, he felt uncomfortable. Maybe, Lex was really dead and Chris' search for him fruitless.
"Don't look at me like that, Clark."
"I don't… How do I look at you?"
"As if I was crazy. Okay, maybe am I, but... I somehow know Lex isn't dead. He can't be. He… he…" She trailed off and rubbed her face. "I can't give him up yet."
"I know. And, I hope you're right," Clark mumbled. "I really hope you're right!"
And suddenly, Chris wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tight.
"I'm sorry, I just… I needed a hug."
"You're, uhm, welcome."
"And, you're so uncomfortable." Chris laughed and took Hannah from him. "He's such a cutie, isn't he?! He's your daddy's bestest friend in the whole wide world. – You're here to pick us up, aren't you?!"
"It's Christmas, Chris. You shouldn't be alone." Clark eyed her for a moment. She was acting tough, but he could almost feel how much she missed Lex. Or, that were his own feelings.
"Besides, Lex wouldn't want you to sit here alone, denying Hannah her first Christmas."
"Oh, he'd be really pissed. He had so many plans for this year. He was…" She broke off and stared at the ceiling, fighting her tears. "Uh, I better get Hannah's diaper bag."
"Chris, do you need another hug?"
She looked at him and flashed him a smile. For the first time since he was there it was a real smile, an honest one.
"Maybe later."
Christmas at the Kents' farm always was something special, and this year was no exception. The place was decorated in the most loving way, and Martha had surpassed herself in the kitchen. She had even made a special baby dish for Hannah.
It was a lovely feast and everyone was enjoying themselves while Chris sat among them rather quietly, feeding her daughter.
She kept telling herself this was better than sitting alone in the apartment above the Talon, staring at the atlas and marking places she hadn't sent people yet to look for Lex.
Absentmindedly, she fed her daughter green beans from her own plate and only noticed it when Hannah was protesting indignantly.
"I could feed her while you eat yourself, bumblebee," her father said who was sitting next to her.
"I'm fine, Dad. Really! Besides, I'm a multi-tasker. See, I can eat and feed at the same time," Chris replied, forcing herself into a fake smile, and fed Hannah some mashed potatoes.
She was unable to follow the conversation at the table; she couldn't even tell who was sitting at it.
Maybe, Lionel had been right declaring Lex dead. It was Christmas and he still wasn't back home. Chris knew nothing would stop him from spending this holiday with his daughter. Nothing but death.
She remembered last year. They had just gotten married, she had been five months pregnant, and Lex already had made plans for his daughter's first Christmas. He had wanted it to be perfect, and even considered buying a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer.
It wouldn't happen this year. It would never happen. All those things Lex wanted to do with Hannah, for Hannah, would never happen.
He wouldn't come back home, being dorky, or completely stiff, or…
"Chris, sweetheart, would you mind giving me a hand?" Martha suddenly asked, causing Chris to blink.
"We can help," Chloe said and nudged Lana who was sitting next to her.
"No, I need the both of you to distract Clark while Chris and I get the pie and the cinnamon rolls --"
"Cinnamon rolls?! You didn't say you'd make cinnamon rolls. I love cinnamon rolls!"
Martha laughed and winked at Chloe. "That's what I mean..."
Everyone else was laughing, too, while Clark looked around sheepishly. Even Chris smiled a little and looked at her father.
"Give me the little sunshine. She can prettify my uniform with some cranberry sauce. Just like you did at her age." The General laughed and flashed Chris a lovingly look.
She was glad he was there and yet, it was the first time in her life his presence failed to cheer her up.
However, she forced herself to smile, kissed his cheek and followed Martha in the kitchen.
"We'll have snow."
"I know... I can smell it, too," Chris mumbled, watching her bemused.
"At this time of year I always have to think of your mom, and how we met at college. --"
"She was the crazy one standing outside your dormitory, staring in the sky and telling you she could smell snow," Chris finished and smiled. "I know the story; Mom told me every year the night of the first snow."
Martha nodded reminiscently and took a pie out of the oven.
"It always was a special day for your mom..."
Chris frowned and watched Martha. What was this all about? Why was she suddenly talking about her mother? Was it really necessary to remind her that she hadn't just lost Lex but also didn't have a mother to comfort her during this time?
"Martha, I… You wanted me to give you a hand, but I don't see --"
"You gave up. I've never seen you give up. In fact, I thought it was impossible for someone that's been raised by your parents to give up." Martha set the pie aside and walked over to Chris, taking her hand into hers.
"I know Lex has been declared dead, but there's still hope, Chris. You've said it yourself over the past four months, again and again. You always said you would feel him being alive --"
"Well, I'm less delusional now," Chris said, trying to free her hands. "It's Christmas and Lex isn't here. That means he's dead, otherwise he'd be here, sitting with us and feeding his daughter." She winced and fought back her tears.
"It's only Christmas Eve," Martha replied patiently. "And, it's the day of the first snow. You always thought it was a magical day --"
"Yeah, and Santa and Mr. Snow will come together tonight, bringing me my husband back, and we'll live happily ever after in a pink cotton candy house," Chris huffed and freed herself. Slightly annoyed, she pushed Martha away and headed for the door. "I need some air!"
She left the kitchen and ran outside, inhaling the cold winter air. It still smelled like snow, and Chris looked up. It wouldn't be long now till the first flakes fell.
Involuntarily, she began to laugh. If this was a movie certainly something magical would happen as soon as it started to snow; bells would began to ring and everything would happen in slow motion.
"Right, and Lex comes home, riding a white horse..." She shook her head and entered the barn, stepped up the stairs and sat down on the sofa.
Many, many moons ago, at her mother's funeral, little Clark had offered her use of the barn whenever she needed a place to be alone.
It has a really nice sofa, and my dad says it's my Fortress of Solitude. Solitude means aloneness.
Again, Chris smiled when she remembered Clark's words. He had been such a cute little boy, and always had tried to impress her with fancy words.
Chris was grateful to know him, though she would have never thought Clark Kent, of all people, would become godfather to her daughter. But then again, she had never thought she would have children at all. At least, not at this point in her life.
Shaking her head, she reached into the pocket of her jeans and pulled out an old photograph. It showed her mom and dad at their engagement party.
"Hi Mom. It's been long... It's Christmas again; another Christmas you aren't around... Another Christmas I sit in the Kents' barn, talking to your picture and thinking of Lex. It's pathetic, isn't it?!" She laughed and wiped off some tears from her cheeks.
"I wish you were here now. I really need you. Of course, Dad's here and he's great, but... Lex is still missing, and… officially, he's even dead now. His father didn't waste a second to get a certificate of his death, and once he had it, he set up this fake funeral and kicked me out of the mansion, and currently, he's contesting Lex's last will. It's okay, though. I don't care about Lex's money anyway. I don't need it. I can earn my living, I can take care of Hannah and me. You always told me, I won't need a man that provide for me. It's just I... I miss him so much, Mom! I'm always thinking of him, and... I even hear his voice."
Chris buried her face in her hands and sobbed quietly. "I don't know what to do without him, or how I shall raise Hannah without him. Little girls need their daddies! – I still hear Lex, and I still smell his skin. Have I ever told you how wonderfully he smelt? Like Scotch and soap and... I can still smell him!"
"Angel, I..."
"Hey bumblebee, welcome back," General Harris said, slightly chuckling.
"W-what… is this Clark's bedroom? What am I... ? Why am I here? How did I get here? I've been in the barn --"
"Where you graciously passed out," the General replied, grinning. "I told you to eat. Martha's roast was delicious." Gently, he brushed his knuckles against her cheek. "I know it's a tough time for you..."
"I heard Lex's voice in the barn," Chris whispered hoarsely, and again, the General smiled.
"Of course, you did."
"You heard mom's voice after she died, too?!" Her voice almost sounded hopeful.
"No, bumblebee. Dead people tend to be rather taciturnly."
Chris winced. "I knew it! I'm going crazy. And, Lionel will take advantage of that and take Hannah from me, and --"
"No one will ever take away Hannah from you, Chris. Least of all, Lionel Luthor! That, I promise you!"
"But, I heard Lex in the barn, and... I felt him." She threw herself into her father's arms and sobbed. "I miss Lex so much that I'm going crazy."
"You're not going crazy, Angel!"
She clung to her father who gently grabbed her by the shoulders and made her look at him.
"You're not going crazy, bumblebee," he said. "Now, look at me: you know what day it is today?!"
"Christmas Eve!?"
"Furthermore, the day of the first snow. A magical day – especially to our family. Only good things happen on this day. I met your mother on this day. I asked her to marry me on this day. You came to us on this day. It was Snow Day when you first told me you love me --"
Chris sniveled. "Your point being... ?"
"When the day of the first snow happens to be on the day of Christmas Eve," the General said in his deep, pleasant voice, "wonderful, magical things will happen. And, they do happen!" He kissed her forehead before he stood up and waved at Lex who had been standing in the doorway for quite a while now.
He had been in the barn before, listening to Chris talking to her deceased mother and when he had walked over to her, touching her shoulder, Chris had passed out. He had to carry her back inside where everyone had stared at him in disbelief. Everyone except for Martha and General Harris who had known he was alive.
Lex knew there was a lot of of explaining lying in front of him, but he just wanted to be with Chris. For four long months he had pictured this moment but now that it finally was there he couldn't move, or say anything. He simply stared at Chris as she was sitting on Clark's bed, staring back at him as though he was a ghost.
"Angel..." He noticed his voice breaking.
"Daddy, you see him too, don't you?!" Chris sought her father's reassurance, and the General nodded. He moved over to Lex and gently pushed him forward.
"You promised me once to make her happy, now don't break that promise," he whispered as Chris suddenly jumped to her feet and threw herself into Lex's arms.
"Lex!!!"
He stumbled backwards a bit but then he wrapped his arms tight around her, burying his face in her hair.
"Don't make her happy right now!" Chuckling, the General left the room and a second later they heard his loud voice.
"That room is restricted area until the kids come down, is that clear?!" Then, he began to laugh. It sounded like a roll of thunder. "Dammit, I love Snow Day!"
Lex grinned. "All quiet on the Western front, eh?!"
Chris didn't say anything but kept looking at him, touching his face. Occasionally, her mouth dropped open, making her look like a fish on land, but she remained quiet when suddenly, she pushed up his sweater, touching his bare chest.
He raised his brows in surprised and stared at her.
"Chris, what... Angel... I'm not complaining but... what are you doing there?"
"Checking your scars. Maybe you're just an impersonator!" She examined his chest, letting her fingertips trail across his skin. "Stabbed, shot, shot again, cut... new one." She looked up at him and Lex saw her eyes filling with tears.
"You're back home... I'm not going crazy."
"No, you're not. At least, not more than you already are," he added, kissing the tip of her nose. She still had her quirks and that borderline lunatic attitude; it was a relief to see she hadn't changed at all.
"Then, you've really been at the barn!?"
Lex nodded and held her while he gently wiped some tears off her cheek. He would never ever let her go again. He had missed her so much, and she still felt so good, and right, and perfect.
"I heard you talking to your mom, and... then you passed out."
"I didn't! I do not pass out."
"It looked pretty much like it. If I hadn't caught you, you would have hit the floor with a thud. And, not graciously."
Chris glared at him – in this special way only Chris would glare at people – and Lex felt the corners of his mouth twitching into a smile. It was so good to be back home; with her.
"That... that was just because I haven't really eaten today."
"Not just today, by the look of it," he mumbled, his eyes roaming her body. "You got skinny."
"Right back at you."
"I lived off worms for four months, what's your excuse?" He said it in a cheerful matter but as soon as those words had left his lips, he saw Chris' eyes filling with tears again, and instinctively he pulled her back into his arms. Gently, he rubbed her back. "Shh-shh."
"They said you were dead. There's even been a funeral. You should've seen your dad. He was all mock-grieving and talking of a tragic accident, although everyone knew that he bribed the pilot and... Well, I know, I just can't prove it, and now he's trying to convince people that I wanted to kill you, because of your money, and --"
"Shh, Angel, it's okay. I know that you don't want me because I'm rich. And, I know you never gave up on finding me," Lex said quietly, still rubbing her back.
"But, I did. I gave you up."
"Well, only at about an hour ago," he snickered and kissed her temple. "Angel, I've been sitting next to General Lane when you talked to him earlier today. He personally brought me here, and I could hear you giving him hell."
Bemused, Chris looked at him, and sighing, Lex realized that he had to start explaining though he'd rather not think about those last four months.
Gently, he pushed her toward Clark's bed and made her sit down. He squatted down in front of her, taking her hands in his.
"Two weeks ago the Marines found me; stranded on a small island, and in a pretty bad shape. I was... suffering from Malaria, and..." He broke off and breathed in deeply. "Of course, your dad was informed immediately, but when he learned about my physical condition, he decided not to tell you anything until --"
"You were fighting for your life and no one told me?!" Chris jumped to her feet, watching him furiously. "All of them downstairs knew you are still alive and I was left out? Yeah, of course, I don't need to know. I was just a wreck, but hey, that's okay. Makes taking care of a baby much more fun..."
She was talking herself into rage and Lex looked at her impressed. She cared so much for him, and there was so much energy inside of her although she looked as though she hadn't eaten or slept much during the past months – it was truly amazing.
He stood up and took her face in his hands. "Martha was the only one that knew," he said quietly. "At least, I think so. She was the only one that didn't seem surprised when I brought you back in. But, your father made the right decision, Angel. I wouldn't have wanted it any differently! I couldn't stand the thought... of you being..." Again, he trailed off.
He knew Chris long enough by now. She was emotional and she would have been relieved and happy to know he was alive, but if he had died from Malaria shortly afterwards, she would have been crushed, and likely, she would have never recovered from that. He knew how much she still suffered from her mother's death, and he needed her to be strong for their daughter.
He looked at her and began to smile. "But, I survived, and... well, I promised you Hannah's first Christmas would be something special --"
Chris wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. For a very long time. As though they had never kissed him before. It was special and beyond everything Lex had ever imagined.
"Gosh, I missed your smile. Have I ever told you that you have the most gorgeous smile? Oh my... I missed you so much! You're the best, bestest Christmas present of all times!" She beamed at him and again, tears were rolling down her cheeks. "Though, next time you have to come with a bow around your neck."
Lex laughed out loud. Chris was unbelievable! Even now, she didn't take him seriously at all. He had missed it. God only knew how much he had missed her.
Several moments passed, quietly. They were standing in Clark's bedroom, clinging onto one another until Chris suddenly looked up.
"I need to apologize to Martha. I was so mean. I yelled at her, and pushed her away, and… She was only helping me, and I've treated her so horribly."
Smiling, Lex cupped her cheek in his hand. "I've never seen Martha be resentful. You've gone through a lot. She'll understand."
"I should apologize anyway," Chris mumbled and looked up at him again. "But, maybe not right now." She rested her head at his chest, wrapped her arms around his waist and sighed happily.
Again, moments passed in silence and Lex hoped this moment would last forever. He would hold Chris for the rest of his life.
"You haven't asked about Hannah yet..." She suddenly said.
Lex bit his lips and looked away.
Hannah, his little princess... He had missed her as much as he had missed Chris. Maybe, even a bit more, and yet he was scared of seeing her. He had been gone for four months – that was half her life. Certainly, she wouldn't even remember him anymore, and that he was scared of.
"'Tis a great first Christmas for her. Her daddy is back."
He forced himself into a smile. Sometimes he wished, he had something of Chris' cheerfulness, and he would be able to switch moods as quickly as she did.
"We spoke a lot of you. Well, I did. She was just listening," Chris continued, smiling. "And boy, was she listening. She loves your voice."
Lex blinked, causing Chris to laugh. "It's a good thing that you always had a minion taping your speeches with a camcorder. I showed her all of those tapes, every day, several times. Well, as long as we were at the mansion, however. Your father made sure I didn't take anything with me that obviously belongs to you..."
He sighed. Chris' voice didn't sound resentful, but the fact that his father had thrown her out of their home, her and Hannah, made him incredibly angry. Lionel had had no right to do so, and Chris shouldn't have needed to deal with looking for a place to stay when she was obviously occupied with finding him.
"But, we still had the video from Hannah's baptism. Keith gave me his copy, and Hannah watched it. I wouldn't be surprised if her first word was economy, or princess. Maybe, Princess Economy!?" She giggled and began to scratch her temple. A displacement activity she always showed when there was a lot going on inside her brain.
"I didn't want her to forget you..."
Lex flashed her a smile. That was definitely something Chris would do, and he appreciated it, but he highly doubted there was any use to it. Hannah was a baby, and she hadn't seen him for four months. Likely, she'd be scared by him now.
"Maybe, she'll need a few days to get used to you again," Chris suddenly said, slightly subdued, and looked up at him. "But, she really missed you. She cried a lot after you've been gone – more than she used to – and she would only stop when I put on one of your shirts and rock her in my arms. But, I had to wear your shirt!"
Again, he smiled. Apparently, Hannah really was her mother's daughter and already had some little quirks herself. She was seven and a half month old now; she must've grown a lot since he had left.
Chris' face blurred in front of him and he had to blink a few times. And, only a second later he felt Chris' fingertips brushing against his cheek.
"I'd love to see her..." he said quietly
She beamed at him and turned to go downstairs..
"Angel, wait!" He pulled her back into his arms, held her tight and buried his face in her hair. "I love you," he whispered brokenly and breathed in a few times. From now on, he wanted to tell her more often, and he would never again replied to any of her love confessions with 'Of course you'!
"Let's go downstairs."
The whispering in the living room stopped abruptly as Chris and Lex entered the room. Everyone stared at them, mouths open, eyes wide. It was so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Only Hannah, who was sitting on her grandfather's lap, playing with his tie, chuckled and gurgled airily.
Suddenly, she turned her head and looked at her mother, as though she had sensed her presence. She giggled but stopped as she spotted Lex. Again, it was silent for a moment before Hannah began to squeak, rather loudly.
Lex and everyone else looked shocked, but Chris beamed and walked over to her father, taking her daughter from him.
"You're one clever cookie, aren't you?! Of course, you are. You have nothing but clever genes in you," she grinned and moved back to Lex.
He looked at her, awkwardly, and almost retreated from her when she lifted Hannah into his arms. The little girl still squeaked and began to touch his face and his scalp with her little hands.
"Chris, I don't know --"
Lex couldn't finished his sentence because Hannah began to laugh. It was incredibly loud considering she was only a baby, but she kept laughing and touching Lex's cheeks.
"Looks like she doesn't need time at all," Clark heard Chris whispering and he felt a lump in his throat when he saw Lex pressing his little daughter against his chest, kissing the top of her head. It was a wonderful sight.
Suddenly, a bell rang and Chloe who sat next to the Christmas tree blushed, slightly. Apparently, she had touched the tree by accident. "Look, Daddy. Teacher says, every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings," she lisped and everyone stared at her for a moment.
"Or, her daddy back." Laughing, Jonathan stood up and joined the young family. He patted Lex's shoulder. "I never thought I'd say this, but... having you here tonight certainly is the best Christmas gift – for all of us."
Everyone agreed loudly, though Clark could only nod. The lump in his throat was getting bigger, and he swallowed a few times. He couldn't believe Lex was really back. Back with his family, back in Smallville, back in his life.
Soon, questions about Lex's absence popped up, but Clark barely heard them. He just kept staring at Lex who seemed to be overwhelmed as well. He held Hannah with one arm and had wrapped the other around Chris' shoulder and it looked as though he wasn't planning to let either of them go any time soon.
Several hours passed. Martha had made Lex eat some of her Christmas dinner, and literally stuffed him with cinnamon rolls while Chris had clung to him as though they were siamese twins. No one had missed Clark who had run to the mansion, assuming now that Lex was back he and Chris would go back to their home and not to the apartment above the Talon. He had been right.
When he arrived at the mansion, he found Matthew, the butler, being busy setting up Christmas decorations.
"Master Lex hasn't asked for it, but Miss Christine, and little Miss Hannah would appreciate it, don't you think?! They sure will. This will be the happiest Christmas ever celebrated in these old walls."
"Did you know that Lex was still alive?"
Slowly, Matthew nodded. "General Harris informed me shortly after they have found Master Lex and gave me instructions to remain silent. Master Lex has been very ill and for a time it didn't look as though he would make it," he said quietly and sighed before he looked at Clark again.
"So, this is Lex's Christmas surprise? He waited to come home for today to make it more special?"
Matthew stopped dead and flashed him a grin. "Let's keep this quiet, but I have to say this is even better than Master Lex's primordial plan for this year's Christmas."
"He had Christmas plans since September?" Clark raised his brows.
"He had plans since little Miss Hannah has been born!"
Clark laughed. That pretty much sounded like Lex. He offered Matthew his help and within two hours they had turned the private living room on the second floor into a Christmassy island. It was the least he could do – apart from giving Hannah a little stuffed monkey for Christmas. He placed the present underneath the Christmas tree before he left to run back home.
He had just reached the porch when Lex stepped out. "There you are..."
"I, uh... needed some air," Clark said hastily. "It's really warm inside."
"And, a bit crowded." Lex grinned and moved over to him.
"Chris is just glad to have you back."
"I wasn't talking of her."
"Oh... of course not, I just... Well, I thought she'd keep her eyes glued on you," Clark replied and shrugged helplessly.
"She's apologizing to your mother. Apparently, they had some sort of argument. Chris feels bad about it, and..." He silenced for a moment before he looked at Clark again. "I fear, you won't get your room back anytime soon," he said. "Now Hannah's upstairs, sleeping."
"Oh, it's okay. She has to be tired; after all the excitement... I'm just wondering why you aren't there with her."
"She wouldn't sleep as long I was in the room, but got more crotchety every minute. She's really tired," Lex chuckled and shook his head a bit, amused. "I still can't believe she actually remembers me. I thought, she'd be scared by me..."
"Well, she's your kid. There has to be some connection between you and her. Besides, Chris made sure she wouldn't forget you. Remember that video Keith made on Hannah's baptism? Hannah had to watch it every day – especially your message to her. I actually feel sorry for her," Clark added with a devious smirk.
He looked at his friend for a moment. He had lost weight and there were signs of a healing sunburn, but all in all he looked good, and there was a twinkle in his eyes he hadn't seen that often before.
Suddenly, Lex began to chuckle. "Four months on a deserted island was almost worth it to see the look on your face right now." He turned towards Clark and hugged him.
"That look is totally justified! I thought your were dead. I've attended your funeral..."
"And, you've been there for Chris and Hannah," Lex smiled. "Chris told me, and... I wanted to thank you. For everything. The thought of you being there for Chris and Hannah kinda kept me alive while I've been... missing."
Clark blushed and looked away, feeling uncomfortable. If it wasn't for him Lex wouldn't have lived on a deserted island for so long. If only he had been two minutes faster, he could have stopped Lex from entering that plane...
"Well, you would've done the same. I mean, if I was missing and had a family," he said and flashed him a crooked smile. "Besides, I'm your friend and Hannah's godfather..." He trailed off and shrugged helplessly. It still felt as though he should have done something more than just supporting Chris and running around, looking for Lex.
"You're the best friend I ever had," Lex said, very quietly and without looking at him, but his voice was steady and he sounded convinced. "I guess, I never told you, but --"
"You don't need to tell me," Clark said hastily. Likely, he would never stop feeling guilty about his lateness. If he had been two minutes faster, he could have stopped Lex from getting on board and no one would have needed to worry about him, or attending his funeral. What kind of best friend was he that he hadn't stopped all of this?
"Yes, Clark, I need to tell you," Lex insisted. "I've been trapped on a deserted island for several months; that gave me a lot of time to think, and... I've realized it's important to express your feelings."
Clark frowned and eyed him curiously. That was odd to hear, especially coming form Lex's lips.
"What happened on that island?"
"Let's just say, even there I've managed to find an enemy," he mumbled and waved his hand as though he tried to whip of some unpleasant memories. "I was just hallucinating from malaria, but I got a good look at myself, or at least the part I've always tried to ignore."
"I guess, we all have to do that; sooner or later... None of us is prefect."
"There you are. And I already feared I had to yell at more generals."
Chris had entered the porch and walked over to the two men. She was beaming, and if Clark hadn't known better he would say she had grown a few inches during the past hours. Of course, that was ridiculous, but she looked better by now, healthier. She was becoming her cheerful, silly, teasing self again.
"I didn't interrupt your boys talk, did I?!" She grabbed Lex's upper arm and leaned against him.
"Would you go back inside if I said yes?" Lex asked dryly and Chris shook her head, grinning.
"Hm-mh."
"Would you go back inside if Clark said yes?"
"Clark wouldn't say yes, because Jonathan and Martha have raised him well," she said and flashed him a smile.
"So, you still need to have the last say." Lex chuckled and Clark couldn't help but grin. They really belonged together and it was still fun to watch their verbal exchange.
"No, I guess tonight I'm gonna leave it to you... Oops."
Clark laughed, and finally began to relax. The important thing was that Lex was alive and back home, and there was no use crying over spilt milk.
Still laughing, he patted Lex's shoulder.
"Welcome home! It's so good to have you back!"
"She's mocked you while I've been away, hasn't she?! That's why you're glad. You're out of the picture now." Lex tried to watch him annoyed, but his eyes were smiling and he definitely looked happy.
"It's here!" Chris suddenly screamed and ran off the porch onto the lawn. She spread her arms, put her head back and turned on her own axis, twice, before she ran back onto the porch and pulling Lex with her.
Clark heard him laughing out loud, saw him shaking his head, and yet he was following her willingly.
"Angel, what are you doing?"
"It's Snow Day. Haven't you heard the General? Don't you see what Snow Day means? It's snowing, Lex! The Snow Day magic applies to our family, too!"
Clark watched them for a moment, happily. They were standing on the lawn, kissing each other while snowflakes were falling on their heads. Maybe Chris was a borderline lunatic but Lex seemed to love that, and he honestly needed someone that loved him and believed in him.
Smiling, he stepped back inside.
"Was that Chris screaming out there?" His mother looked at him.
"Yep, it's snowing," he said matter-of-factly and kept standing in the doorway. "Are there some cinnamon rolls left?"
Chris and Lex deserved another moment alone before everyone else was running outside to see the first snow of the year. It was the least he could do.