Work Text:
-z-
There’s a whoop.
-x-
Finn’s eyes open and Poe keeps his cry of joy locked tightly in his chest. “Hey,” he says instead, leaning against his arms folded over the rail.
Finn stares, his eyes half-lidded even as he blinks them rapidly. Then he croaks out: “Hey, yourself.”
Poe huffs a laugh and puts his hand on Finn’s chest and tries not to cry.
-
“It’s not that bad,” Finn says, a touch of desperateness in his voice as he tightens his hold on a completely ruined jacket. (The same jacket that once belonged to Poe.)
“I’ll get you another one,” Poe says, putting a hand over Finn’s – trying to both comfort him and loosen Finn’s grip.
“It won’t be the same,” Finn says, strangely urgent. He’s still in the hospital bed and still in a hospital gown, but his eyes blaze all the same.
“Okay, okay,” Poe says, staying calm and, putting on his best smile, adds: “you can keep this one. Just let me get you another one to actually wear, okay?”
Finn purses his lips and his gaze lowers to the leather he gripped so tightly. A moment passes and then two, before he looks back up. “I can keep this one, right?” he asks.
“Yeah,” Poe answers, taking one of Finn’s hand into both of his. “Yeah, of course, Finn.”
-
When Finn is discharged, he moves into Poe’s room without asking.
-
He shows up with a smile and Poe’s old jacket and clothes that didn’t quite fit him.
“I don’t, um—” Finn looks down and away with a shrug that was probably supposed to come off as confident.
He shrugs again, looks around Poe’s barracks room – the kitchenette served as the dining room which flowed into the bedroom-slash-living room; his eyes roaming over everything – the cupboards, the stove, the little couch, the dining chairs and table, the bed tucked into the corner, the dresser.
“Uh, I don’t—”
It’s not until Finn’s eyes hesitate on the open closet with lazily hung clothes that Poe realizes the source of Finn’s hesitation.
“Why don’t we see if anything fits?” Poe says, jerking his head at the closet. He wants to take Finn shopping – he wants to buy him his own clothes, he wants to give Finn something that hasn’t already been worn a hundred times over.
But they didn’t have the time.
So he waits.
-
The long, long weeks of physical therapy are filled with Poe dancing just out of Finn’s reach.
“Gotta catch me,” he always says, making Finn take that extra stumble-step.
There are days when Finn catches Poe easily – when his still healing muscles cooperate and work like they were supposed to.
And there were days when he was stiff, when he felt heavy. When he moved too slow and sweat beaded on his forehead and rolled down his screaming back – when he fell to his knees and couldn’t bring himself to stand as his back burned, burned, burned.
(“It’s okay,” Poe says the first time Finn can’t quite pull himself up – Poe crouches down in front of him, puts his arms around Finn’s neck. “It’s okay,” he repeats.)
-
When Finn gets his first Resistance paycheck – a long number of credits to his name – Poe takes him to market, shoves Finn into Poe’s own favorite store.
“I love this place,” Poe says.
Finn looks over his shoulder and says, “Then I’m sure I’ll love it, too.”
And Poe melts – because Finn is wearing Poe’s favorite shirt and while Poe is going to miss seeing Finn in his clothes, he wants nothing more than for Finn to have something that’s all his own. Something that he got to pick and buy for himself.
(That day – they walk out with three outfits for Finn. All of which were remarkably similar to what was already in Poe’s closet – just in different colors.)
-x-
There’s a whoop and then there’s a scream.
-x-
“I think I love you,” Finn says. He was hesitant, as if unsure if he was using the right terminology.
Except, the thing about Finn was that he could fake anything with the best of them. He could confidently maneuver his way through conversations while he was floundering – and only Poe and Rey would be able to tell.
And, looking at Finn – really looking at him – Poe knows that Finn knows exactly what he’s saying. So Poe smirks and leans in close and says, “I think I love you, too.”
-
It’s not long after the destruction of the Starkiller Base before Poe is called back to the skies.
-
Before every mission, Poe makes it a point to tell Finn, “I’ll be right back.” Then he presses a kiss to Finn’s forehead, cheeks, lips, and adds: “Keep the bed warm for me.”
And Finn always responds with: “I’ll see you in a bit.”
They never say “goodbye” or “I love you” in those conversations.
It felt too final.
(When things turn out the way they do, Finn never says the words to anyone ever again – the words were rusted in his throat.)
-x-
There’s a whoop and then there’s a scream and then there’s silence.
-x-
Poe has a mission the next morning and he knows he should be sleeping – instead, he watches Finn watching him – lays nose-to-nose with him, sharing his air and trying to memorize his scent.
“So, I’ve been reading,” Finn says.
“Oh?” Poe prompts.
“The books Snap gave me,” Finn adds.
Poe rolls his eyes. Snap was a fan of trashy romance novels – loved that they were everything that had nothing to do fighting and death and the First Order – and as much as he loved them, he loved pushing his favorite books onto his friends.
“Do you think we’ll have a happy ever after?” Finn asks.
Poe immediately wants to say: yes. Yes, I’ll give you whatever you want. But he knows better. He’s seen too many friends, too many great pilots go down from stray missiles and lucky hits, to lie to Finn (who should know better himself and probably does – he was probably just looking for comfort).
So, instead of “yes” – Poe says: “I’ll try my hardest.”
“Me, too,” Finn says, his eyes slowly drifting closed.
-
“I’ll be right back,” Poe says, presses a chaste kiss to Finn’s lips as he leans out of the cockpit. “Keep that bed warm for me.”
-x-
There’s a whoop and then there’s a scream and then there’s silence and then Finn is alone.
-z-
End.