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Battle of Wits

Summary:

Herta is a busy woman.

Yet still, when she sees her so-called rival being, of all things, a fan, her fan, she can't stop her fingers from typing up a snarky response.
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Or, the famous HSR AU nobody asked for.

Chapter 1: Herta

Notes:

i cannot describe how much i love herta/sw
heres something completely self-indulgent that nobody asked for!!

if you're here for submerged in silence, worry not, im not abandoning it. however, unless i get sudden motivation, im taking a hiatus on it until... lets say july 25. i promise you guys I will never abandon a fic, even if it takes me years to finish it, k?

with that being said, enjoy! :)

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Herta was a busy woman. Newly 21, model icon, and neuroscience major. She barely had any free time left, so she savored every last minute of what she got. You see, she never intended to be a model; she had been picked off the street by some shady guy thinking she was young and naïve and thought, you know what, to hell with it, and gave it a shot. She never expected the career to pick up, but it did, and it was both the only thing keeping her afloat and the thing dragging her away from her dreams of science.

Young she was, still and at the time, but naïve? No. Not Herta. Never Herta. As soon as she got famous enough, she quit that shady agency with the creepy manager and joined a trustworthy one with a manager she appointed herself; a nervous yet clever pink-haired girl named Asta. Herta mainly picked her because she minored in Astronomy, and Herta recognised another woman of science when she saw one. Despite that, Herta had grown a little fond of the girl, though she was a bit of a ditz. Asta was really the closest thing she had to a real friend, aside from her roommate Screwllum.

As of right now, she was reveling in her free time, draped across her and Screwllum’s shared couch, reading an old, beaten-up physics textbook. She wasn’t studying, no, she didn’t have to do that. She knew she could ace any test her tired professors threw her way.

As far back as she could remember, Herta was a genius. She wasn’t born with the secrets to the universe, no, she was smart enough to know that was a preposterous idea. But as a child, she picked up on things faster than other kids, and by the time children her age were reading picture books, she was reading biology textbooks. She had always had this insatiable fascination with all things science; hell, she could hardly choose a major when the time came. There was just something about figuring out how things ticked that itched her brain in a satisfying way. Her parents had worried at the time, but now they couldn’t care less, as long as she was “out of their hair”. Forever. She didn’t really care, because they never did.

Distantly, she became aware of the door to her dorm being unlocked, and her roommate entering. He raised an eyebrow at the girl as he walked to his desk.

“Studying, are we? That’s new for you, Herta. Something amiss?”

Herta let out a vaguely amused scoff. Screwllum was a strange man. Despite being a tech whiz and a computer science major, he tended to speak in a formal, almost Shakespearean manner, creating a very odd clash of aesthetics. But she wasn’t really one to judge. Screwllum had turned away from her, focusing on his computer, mouse clicking away.

Eventually, she couldn’t take it anymore. She slammed the textbook shut and set it on the ground next to the couch, drawing herself into a sitting position and pulling her legs close, hugging her chest, set in a pathetic, sad puppy position.

“Screwllum.”

“Yes?”

She had never called the man by his first name. It felt too foreign on her tongue, despite knowing him for three years. It was always Screwllum. He could not possibly have another name. Screwllum himself, however, paid no attention to such formalities, calling Herta by her first name since day one.

“I’m jealous of you.” She blurts out before she can stop her lips from moving. She can practically feel his eyebrows arch.

“Mm? And why, pray tell, would that be?”

“I—It’s just—” she sighs in frustration, begging her brain to catch up and grasp the right words to fit her complex feelings into speech. “You get to do this. I mean, be a scientist and all, after college. I don’t. That future was severed from me the moment I accepted that stupid, stupid, modeling job.”

Screwllum made a thoughtful hum, and the clicking stopped. He leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes.

“That does make sense, I suppose. But you do have a choice, you know. It isn’t an easy one. You could quit modeling to be a scientist; you certainly have the mind to be a great one. However, that does come with the risk of losing the only source of steady income you have.”

Herta sighed in frustration, combing at her hair.

“I know. That’s why I can never go back to science. You and I both know there is nothing left for me here. I’m only finishing college because this is my last connection to doing what I love,” she huffed, and leaned against the back of the couch.

Screwllum made another noise of mild agreement before clacking away on his noisy keyboard. She should really use her paycheck to get him a better one so it wouldn’t annoy her so damn much.

“You’re supposed to comfort me, not agree with—”

Herta is interrupted by a ping from her phone. She frowns, pulling out the device. She checks the notifications, and sure enough, there is one just now from…Twitter. Of all places, why, just why, did it have to be Twitter? Nothing good ever comes from Twitter. But she has a job which involves being up to date with the media, so she begrudgingly opens the app and checks the first post she was pinged in.

She first notices she’s not the only one pinged in it, as she recognises the second handle: @SilverWolf. Her racing mind registers a memory, “...overrated…”, but she swats it aside to focus on the task at hand. The post has an image attached, one featuring a familiar silver-haired girl chewing bubble gum set in what seems to be a coffee shop. The main focus of the image, as the massive red circle oh-so-helpfully points out, is the girl’s Nintendo Switch, grasped tight in her hands, eyes laser focused on the screen. Mainly, though, is the fact that the back has a sticker of none other than Herta herself plastered on the back.

In order to understand what this means or who exactly this girl is to Herta or why people are freaking out tagging her everywhere for this occasion, you must first understand the backstory.

When Herta first rose to fame, the shady agency jumped at the chance to force Herta into an interview with a famous news outlet when they reached out. It was mostly basic questions, up until the one about The Movie. That’s not what it was called. It was the one and only thing anyone would ever talk about at the time, the movie called Stellaron. It also formed the aptly named “Stellaron Quartet”, a group of four actors who, after starring in said movie, became close friends and worked on many other films with each other.

The interviewer had asked Herta what she thought about the movie. Since it was all anyone would talk about, Herta couldn’t take it anymore, and, at some point before the modeling job, dragged Screwllum with her to see it in theaters. Unlike other questions, her (creepy) manager did not prepare a robotic answer for this one, so she decided to just speak the truth.

“I think it’s insanely overrated.”

The media flipped when the interview got out. The clip went viral, until one Silver Wolf got her hands on it. She had tagged Herta in a taunting post, Herta couldn’t remember the exact phrasing, and she had seen red. She had replied with some fast quip, and thus started the 3-year-long feud-slash-rivalry between Herta and Silver Wolf. It all took place over social media; Herta had never actually met the girl in real life (though she came dangerously close during a convention). Herta had thought nothing of her statement in the interview at the time; she was being honest, she didn’t really like it that much. Sure, the acting was good, but the story was mid and full of plot holes. Silver Wolf was apparently very protective of the movie at the time, so she supposed it was only natural that she made a snarky comment in response to Herta’s “hate”.

So you can imagine Herta’s surprise and amusement to learn that her rival, the notoriously ill-mannered Silver Wolf herself, has a sticker of her rival on her switch. Herta frowned, thinking for a moment. For the majority of the rivalry, she hadn’t actually felt much genuine hate towards Silver Wolf. Of course, to an outsider looking in, they seemed like they were actually about to kill each other most of the time. Still, it was surprising indeed to find out that Silver Wolf had Herta merch that she didn’t buy out of spite for the girl. This was clearly a paparazzi photo; she was relaxed, in a casual outfit, and had no makeup on. It was a little charming.

She shook her head.

“How odd,” she murmured. Herta then checked Silver Wolf’s account, finding that the girl had been dead silent about the whole situation. This only furthered Herta’s amusement. Silver Wolf was hiding, probably out of embarrassment, from the media who finally found out that maybe she didn’t hate Herta quite as much as she said she did.

Well, if she didn’t want to come out of her silence on her own, maybe it was time for Herta to poke the bear.

She typed up a tweet tagging Silver Wolf.

@SilverWolf Fan, are we? I suppose I can fit you into my schedule if you really want to meet me ;)

Notes:

hsr and genshin have taken over my entire life rn guys