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After she thanked him for the kiss and ran off Penelope couldn’t stop grinning. She just had her first kiss. With Colin Bridgerton! She couldn’t believe it. Was she dreaming? She wouldn’t be surprised if she was. How many times had she dreamt of Colin kissing her? Too many to count. But this, this felt different it felt so real it had to be real, right? As she reached her bedroom her grin faded, and her face contorted in embarrassment. Oh my god, did she ask him to kiss her? Oh god. What now? Surely, they couldn't continue their lessons now. Not after the latest Whistledown and definitely not after she embarrassed herself by asking him to kiss her like that. Why did he kiss her? Was it out of pity? Of course it was out of pity. What else could it be? That somehow made her embarrassment even worse. How was she supposed to face him after that? Did she ruin the entirety of their friendship by asking that one stupid question? She already lost Eloise and having Colin as her friend these past couple weeks has been the singular reason she has managed to survive the beginning of her third season. Did she just ruin that? She had to move forward. She wasn’t sure how she was going to do it, especially after the ton had become aware of the scandal of Colin helping her find a husband. Surely there wouldn’t be many suitors rushing over to discourse with her now. Not that there were many to begin with but that was beside the point. She had no choice; she would have to push forward.
All week she was doing her best to avoid Colin. She must admit, she was pretty successful in doing so. She’s managed to spot him first the past 3 days when she was out at the park and managed to hide under the willow try undetected. This morning however as she went to hide under the willow tree, she was sure he was following her. She had noticed he had spotted her and had already started to approach her when she made her way to her hiding spot. God help her she had no idea how she was supposed to speak to him right now. Her embarrassment still lingering in the back of her mind.
“Good day.” Colin said. As he took a few long strides to get closer to her.
“Good day.” Penelope responded softly. “It’s good to see you.” She said nervously.
“Yes, it is... it is good to see you as well.” He stood nervously towering over her. “And I apologize for not coming to see you... earlier.” He stated never breaking eye contact.
“Oh. It is for the better you did not.” She broke contact shaking her head.
“Is it?” He responded as soon as she had finished speaking.
“Isn’t it?” she questioned as she returned his gaze.
He shook his head. “It is.”
She averted his gaze once again. Trying to find her words.
“Uh...” She took a sharp intake of breath before deciding on her words. “We cannot continue our lessons.” Shaking her head once again.
“Oh.” He said shockingly as she caught him off guard. “Uh, I agree.”
“Good.”
There was an awkward pause as Colin was processing exactly what she just said.
“Uh, just so I'm clear, what is your reasoning, exactly? Is it because of what happened between us?”
“No! N—No, um...” She was flustered. Blinking repeatedly and shaking her head in disbelief that he would even mention it. “But I assure you, nothing of the kind will ever happen again.” She brought her arm up to her chest nervously avoiding his gaze the entire time.
“Of course. And I apologize for the-”
“No. I apologize for asking,” She interrupted.
“Do not apologize.” He stated.
“You apologized.” she said awkwardly.
“Yes, but I-” He paused for a moment trying to regain his composure. “Yes.” He looked down then looked back to her and noticed she had dropped her head and started fiddling with her hands.
“The lessons.” He continued as she looked back up at him. “You said they cannot continue.”
“They cannot.” She paused briefly. “Whistledown has written about us. I have embarrassed myself and my family, and if we were to continue, I’d embarrass yours as well.”
He nodded in agreement. “Yes. That is very...” What was the word he was searching for? “Sensible.”
“In fact, it may be best if we keep our distance for now.”
He stared at her in disbelief. That was the very last thing he wanted now.
“Oh, of... Of course.” he stuttered.
“I must become serious about my prospects.” She threw him a nervous smile as she rocked slightly on her feet.
“Prospects are important” he nodded.
“Prospects which have gone from very little to even less, but I must do my best.” she sighed.
“Yes, you must.” He raised his eyebrows. “Uh...” There was another awkward pause before he continued. “Well... Um...” he paused trying to decide exactly what he should say. “I will go and leave you to it.”
“Oh.” She shook her head and stopped him with her hand interrupting him before he had the chance to leave. “I will go.” She began to spin around to leave when he called out to her, gaining her attention once again.
“Uh, Penelope. I-” She locked eyes with him once more.
He stammered for a moment searching for his confidence and once he did.
“I have a question I’ve been needing to ask you,” She looked up at him stunned and scared. What could he possibly have the need to ask her?
And then all of a sudden, he finally blurted out what he had been wanting to ever since his lips had touched hers.
“Penelope, would you ever consider me as a prospect?”
“What?”
“Pen, will you court me?”