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"He went there! Go find him!"
As he heard the sound of footsteps receding, he dashed in the opposite direction to get as far away from those guys as possible.
It is all my fault.
He recalled seeing Mikey's body lying on the ground. His face smashed and bones twisted in a bloody mess.
I shouldn't have left him alone.
As he sprinted up the stairs to the tenth-floor bowling alley, regret clawed at his chest. He remembers seeing Takemichi's bloodied body shot through the chest multiple times. His hand reaching out of the broken glass window and his head leaning at the edge.
I shouldn't have talked to him outside the pet shop. I shouldn't have interfered with Chifuyu and Draken's decision.
He remembers holding Takemichi's body which was turning cold in his arms. Desperately shaking him hoping it would be enough to bring him back to life.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Now fleeing from the Bonten men, he couldn't fathom why they pursued him. With their boss dead, who was giving them orders?
He looked down at his hands. His arms and torso were soaked in Takemichi's blood. Tears stung his eyes, each breath ragged and labored. He could feel his heart pounding in his ears. His throat was constricted; he felt trapped in his own body. He wanted to scream but his voice wouldn't come out.
He can barely imagine how devastated everyone will be when they discover what happened.
Draken and Chifuyu had been trying to keep Takemichi away from Mikey. They wanted him to stay away from all this and live a happy life. But he dragged him into this. He asked him to team up with him to find Mikey. He was the one who left him alone. He should have stayed longer. He should've taken him home.
I killed him.
The images of Takemichi's lifeless body kept haunting him. How will he ever face his friends again?
How will he tell Hina-chan that she'll become a widow before becoming a bride?
How will he be able to look Atsushi in the eyes and tell him he killed his best friend?
Atsushi…
Atsushi is the man who chose him despite his many flaws. The man who knew his hands were soaked in blood but still held them anyway. Will he still keep his hand now that the blood on it belongs to Takemichi?
Tears streamed down his face, his sobs catching in his throat, struggling for air that refused to fill his lungs. His hair had come undone at some point and was now poking in his eyes. He could barely make out where he was going. He just kept running despite his legs screaming for him to stop.
It wasn't until he felt something cold touch his feet that he stopped. He pushed his hair out of his face to look at his surroundings. He was standing in the middle of the beach.
The beach was cloaked in darkness. The only sounds he could hear were the crashing waves and his inner turmoil.
He stood there for a while, letting the waves wash over his feet as he recollected his thoughts.
He caught his breath and let his heart rate even out. He could slowly feel his throat open up but tears still wouldn't halt. His thoughts were still wavering but not as volatile as before.
As he regained his senses, he felt a presence behind him. He whipped around expecting a Bonten member but found himself staring at a figure silhouetted against the ocean. He couldn't quite place it but there was something very familiar about this person.
That person must have sensed he was being watched because he turned around before Kazutora could say anything. He looked alarmed at being intruded upon. His eyes looked dull and tired yet so familiar .
He knew those eyes.
"Atsushi?" The word escaped his mouth, surprising both himself and the figure.
For a moment neither of them moved. The person was standing there as if left at the mercy of the waves. He made no attempt to start a conversation. He simply resorted to staring at him with those wistful eyes.
Kazutora was still trying to make sense of the situation. He took in the appearance of the man in front of him. A buzz cut and arms wrapped in tattoos. He wore a simple T-shirt with pants. There was nothing that stood out about this man, except maybe his eyes. His eyes, which undoubtedly resembled that of Atsushi, didn't hold as much life as Atsushi's did.
"You're… You're not Atsushi." He concluded. "Who are you?"
"I am Atsushi." The man, whose voice sounded almost identical to Atsushi, finally spoke up. "But I am not your Atsushi."
"You're… Atsushi?" With everything that has happened this evening, he feels like he's going to lose all sense of rationality.
"I am." He confirmed. "But how about you call me Akkun? I feel like Atsushi is a name that is too precious for you to give to someone else."
He even shared Atsushi's nickname.
"What are you?"
"You don't need to bother with the details. I won't be here for long."
"What are you talking about?" He raised his voice. "What is happening?! Takemichi is dead. Mikey is dead. Bonten is chasing me. And now there's another Atsushi?" He couldn't hold himself together and let out a sob.
Akkun watched Kazutora weep in front of him and gave him some time to calm down before asking, "Who are you?"
"Hanemiya Kazutora," he answered weakly.
"Hanemiya Kazutora," Akkun mumbled, "You're one of Toman's founders."
Kazutora's eyes shot up. "You know me?"
"I've heard about you. This is the first time I've actually seen you."
"What is happening?"
"Kazutora-kun, can I ask you something?" There was a hint of desperation in his voice. "There's something I really need to know."
Kazutora took a moment to think before nodding.
"What happened to Takemichi and Hina-chan? Where is Kisaki?"
Kazutora froze up at that. How was he supposed to answer that?
"Takemichi…" He croaked out, "He is dead. Because of me." He took a breath to compose himself. "Kisaki also died twelve years ago after getting hit by a truck. I wasn't there so that's all I know. And Hina-chan… She- She won't be able to marry Takemichi anymore. It's all my fault."
"So, Hina-chan is alive." Akkun teared up, "You came so far, Takemichi." He whispered to himself, "That night, I jumped off on baseless hope that you'll fix everything. You actually came so far."
"What do I do?" Kazutora interrupted his monologue. "I don't know where to go."
Akkun took a moment before answering, "If you have nowhere to go, why don't you join me?" He gestured towards the ocean.
He contemplated the offer. It was very tempting. He could disappear into the ocean and atone for his sins with his life. He could drown himself in the waves. If he's fortunate enough he'll get to see Takemichi in the afterlife and apologize to him.
He took a few steps towards the ocean. The water now almost reached his stomach. He can do this. Just a little more and–
Don't die, Kazutora
Draken's voice snapped him back to reality. He was taken back to that day in Juvie twelve years ago when Draken and Takemichi visited him. He was thinking of something very similar back then.
I'll never forgive you if you take your own life to try to make amends.
He was right. He can't do this. He has to make amends with his life but not by sacrificing it.
"Have you reconsidered, Kazutora-kun?" Akkun asked quietly, appearing behind him.
Kazutora glanced back, his resolve hardening. "I can't go through with this without facing them first."
"I'm glad." Akkun gave him a sorrowful smile, "I wish I could've made that choice."
"Why didn't you?" Kazutora didn't know what Akkun was referring to but felt a sense of camaraderie between them.
"I'm just a coward. I have no excuse to defend myself." Akkun's voice wavered, tears pooling in his eyes. "Kazutora-kun, I need to ask you something."
"What is it?"
"Your Atsushi? Is he a coward too?"
Kazutora felt enraged at that. "My Atsushi is not a coward. He's the bravest man I know. He's the guy who would lay his life for his friends. The guy who fought alongside Takemichi and Toman many times without standing down. Don't you ever call him a coward."
To his surprise, Akkun chuckled softly. "So that's him, huh? Takemichi worked wonders on him. A true hero."
"What are you–"
"Kazutora-kun," Akkun said over him, "Don't worry. Takemichi is not dead. If he was, I wouldn't be here."
"What does that mean?"
"Please let me speak." Akkun interrupted again. Kazutora decided to hear him out for now. "Whenever Takemichi goes back in time, the worlds he had created collide until they are completely written over when he returns to the present. Right now, the Atsushi you see is one of the many Atsushi that Takemichi has met throughout his many lives."
"I don't get it."
"You're not supposed to. You'll forget it soon enough." Without giving him a chance to speak, Akkun continued, "These worlds only exist as long as Takemichi is in the past. The moment he returns we'll be erased from existence."
"But then why are you here? How do you know all this?"
"It was probably Takemichi's desire to save me that made me get caught up in this labyrinth. I have come across Hina-chan in some other timelines as well. It was probably Hina-chan who he failed to save."
Seeing that Kazutora had nothing to add he continued, "I have a feeling this will be the last time he goes back. Any moment now, I'll disappear and you'll forget about this. Soon enough when he changes the past, this world will cease to exist."
"You mean we'll die?" Kazutora asked, alarmed.
"No, you will simply be replaced by the new versions of yourself born out of the new timeline."
"But that's…"
"Scary?"
"A little…"
"I was afraid too," he admitted. "Back when I jumped off. But meeting you has made me realize that maybe better versions of me exist."
"You mean–"
"Kazutora-kun, I don't have much time left." Akkun's voice was breaking. "In the next lifetime, when we meet, I hope you meet the same Atsushi you know now." There was a plea in his words. "If you do, please look after him for me. He must have worked hard to be there."
"What are you talking about–" He faltered when he saw Akkun crying.
Tears were streaming down his face, "Also I should let you know, tell your Atsushi about what happened. I promise you, he won't hate you. Please trust me just this once." he gave him one last smile before fading away.
Kazutora was left speechless as he watched him disappear. His feet refused to move and he remained on the shore, caught between regret and a fragile resolve.
His ringtone pierced the silence, jolting him awake. He immediately picked up the call when he saw Atsushi's name in the caller ID.
"Kazutora, where are you?" He sounded worried.
"I'm at the beach. I was talking to–"
Who was he talking to?
"I mean there was someone here–"
Was there someone here?
"Atsushi, I- I'll be home soon. I have to tell you something." he hung up.
Dizziness washed over him. Why was everything so blurry, memories slipping through his fingers like sand?
He looked back at the ocean. He had to go back to Atsushi.
I have to face them.
He dragged his feet across the sand.
Atsushi won't hate me.
He was told so.
Who told him that?
"I promise you, he won't hate you. Please trust me just this once."
The words echoed in his mind, but he couldn't place a voice for them.