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Finn sighed heavily as he looked in the mirror on the inside of the wardrobe door, tugging self-consciously at the cuff of his purple shirt, which he wore along with black suit trousers. He really, really didn’t want to go tonight but he had already returned his invite saying he was attending and Poe was excited. Why Finn had no idea, other than the fact his boyfriend was an attention whore and enjoyed meeting new people and got a kick out of them drooling over him. Whoever thought high school reunions were a good idea, anyway? Why would anyone want to return to the place that you dreamt to escape the whole time you were there? Who in their right mind would want to see the people they had hated again after they finally had blocked them from their lives?
He sighed again, dropping his arms to his sides and glanced at the suit jacket still hanging up in the wardrobe. Finn was just contemplating whether the jacket would be too much when Poe entered their bedroom fully-dressed, hair styled and shoes on, ready to go.
“The cars outside, buddy,” his boyfriend smiled, coming over to stand behind Finn, “You ready?”
“Here’s a crazy thought,” Finn said, watching Poe’s face in the mirror, “why don’t we just go to the next one instead?”
Poe chuckled and wrapped his arms around Finn’s waist, pressing his front to Finn’s back.
“You’re nervous,” his boyfriend murmured, kissing Finn’s neck just above the collar of his shirt, “I get that.”
Finn snorted, “Yeah, right. I don’t think you’ve been nervous a day in your life.”
Poe smiled, hugging Finn tighter for a moment, replying, “I’ve been nervous – the first time we met, the first time we slept together, the first time I told you I loved you, when I asked you to move in with me.”
“So…I make you nervous?” Finn smirked, turning around in his boyfriend’s arms and looping his own around his neck.
Poe leaned in a kissed him sweetly, “You always have my heart racing, buddy.”
Finn groaned, dropping his forehead onto Poe’s shoulder, “You’re just buttering me up so I’ll agree to go tonight.”
“Hey, come on,” Poe ran a hand up Finn’s back and turning his head and nuzzling his ear, “It’ll be fun! When has an evening out we me ever not been fun?”
Finn honestly couldn’t give an answer, sure there had been times when something not so good had happened, but Poe had the amazing ability to make light of even the gloomiest situation. He huffed into his boyfriend’s shoulder then lifted his head, “Fine, alright we’ll go, but you mustn’t leave my side the entire time!”
Poe slipped his hands down onto Finn’s hips, pressing their bodies’ snuggly together.
“I’ll be stuck to you like glue,” his boyfriend purred, kissing the corner of his mouth, “Besides, I wouldn’t want any old love interests to get any smart ideas.”
Finn winced, “I don’t think you have to worry about that, I wasn’t exactly Mr Popular during high school. I doubt hardly anyone will even remember me.”
“I think you’ll be surprised,” Poe insisted, pecking Finn once more on the lips before stepping back, “Now, come on, before our car decides to go without us.”
“Do you think I should wear the suit jacket?” Finn asked, turning back to the wardrobe, ”or will I look like I’m trying too hard?”
Poe himself looked drop-dead gorgeous as he always did – dressed in a soft woollen grey-blue suit trousers and jacket, with a navy waistcoat, but he had made it more casual by putting on a denim shirt underneath the waistcoat and the collar of a white t-shirt just visible in the open v of the shirt. The older man hadn’t shaved either so there was a shadow of stubble on his face; Finn found himself staring.
“The suit jacket is rather smart,” Poe winked at Finn, snapping him from his trance, “and if we get there and everyone else is just in t-shirts and jeans then at least we’ll stand out as being the best dressed couple.”
“Why are you looking forward to this so much?” Finn asked as he got out the suit jacket and slipped it on, fiddling with his shirt sleeves once more – one of the buttons having come undone.
“Because,” Poe began, stepping forwards and gently taking Finn’s wrist in his hands, redoing the button for him, “You never talk about high school, I want to see it, hear from your old friends about what you were like back then.”
Finn reached out and tugged his boyfriend into a kiss, suddenly desperate for the contact – the reminder that he had Poe now.
“Buddy,” Poe breathed against his lips, “What is it?”
Finn shook his head, kissing Poe again, supressing a shudder. His boyfriend slipped one arm around his waist and reached with his other to cup the nape of his neck. Finn knew Poe wasn’t blind and that he was going to continue to ask what was wrong till he gave in and told him.
“In the car,” Finn promised, knowing that if he got into it now they would never make the reunion on time and the more the memories raced round his head, the more Finn realised he needed to go.
They felt their house and made their way down the short driveway to the car that was waiting next to the curb – they had both decided they’d want a drink tonight so had booked a cab there and back. They got into the back of the car, Poe exchanging an apology to the driver for making him wait then confirming the name and address of the school. As the car pulled away and Finn settled into his seat, he let out a long shaky breath. He felt Poe’s hand slip into his and he looked at his boyfriend. Poe didn’t say anything, just smiling reassuringly and waiting patiently.
“I didn’t have many friends,” Finn said quietly, not really knowing where to begin, “I only ever really had one but her parents moved away and we kind of love contact. High school wasn’t a great time for me…I never really fitted in, I wasn’t a jock or a nerd or any of the others, I was always just…me.”
Poe looked more seriously at him, concern suddenly in his brown eyes as he squeezed his hand.
“I can’t really remember ever being happy when I was at high school. I just never felt like I belonged there, among everyone else…” Finn shifted in his seat and Poe leaned closer, “I-I guess I never truly felt like I belonged till I met you.”
“Finn…” Poe whispered, lifting their joint hands and kissing Finn’s, “We can go home.”
“No,” Finn shook his head, “I need to go back there, to show them that they were wrong about me. They used to call me Freak, said no one would ever want me.”
Poe leaned in and Finn accepted his chaste kiss, breathing in and inhaling his boyfriend’s aftershave. He kept his face close to Poe’s, their lips brushing but not actually kissing, his eyes closed.
“You’re the most wonderful man I know, Finn,” Poe whispered, his other hand coming up and stroking the side of Finn’s face, “You’re brave and kind and too good for this world.”
Finn smiled, nuzzling Poe lovingly, “If that’s true, than you made me all those things.”
“I love you,” Poe told him, kissing him deeply, the man knew how important it was for Finn to hear that right now.
“Thank you,” Finn breathed, opening his eyes and looking into Poe’s, “I love you too.”
They stayed huddled close, fingers entwined and heads together, for the rest of the drive to the school. When they got there and stepped out of the car, Finn looked around at the familiar parking lot and was struck by how much smaller it looked. Poe straightened his clothes and took hold of Finn’s hand, kissing his cheek.
“Ready?” he said into his ear, his breath warm and voice soft. Finn nodded, mouth dry, and he held on to Poe’s hand a little tighter.
Together they walked towards the main school building, passing the old bike shed where Finn had tried once to smoke in the hope it would get a group of boys to like him – he had ended up coughing for half an hour and going light-headed. There was a few other late-comers headed that way too, Finn glanced at them anxiously, praying they didn’t recognise him. Don’t think like that, he told himself, they were wrong and you have Poe! He held his head a little higher and squared his shoulders. Poe noticed the change and smiled broadly.
Inside they were greeted by a woman in her early sixties wearing a green dress and her long grey hair pulled up in a bun. Finn remembered her, she had been one of the only teacher who had thought his art held promise and had actually encouraged him.
“Mrs Organa!” He smiled wide, surprising both himself and Poe with his abrupt enthusiasm.
The woman’s bright eyes widened and she beamed at him, coming around the table she was stood behind, arms outstretched.
“Finn, oh it’s good to see!” She put her hands on his shoulders, squeezing, “Look at you, you’ve grown into such a handsome young man, and who’s this?”
“This is Poe Dameron, my boyfriend,” Finn said, proudly introducing Poe, “We met not long after I graduated.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Poe flashed Mrs Organa one of his most charming smiles, offering her the hand that wasn’t claimed by Finn.
“The pleasures all mine, Mr Dameron,” Mrs Organa said politely, though by the twinkle in her eye Finn could tell she was impressed, “and please, call me Leia.”
“Sorry we’re a little late,” Finn said, looking down the corridor in the direction of the big double doors that led into the gym where he could hear voices coming from, “How’s Kylo getting on, Mrs Organa?”
Kylo was the name Mrs Organa’s son had insisted he go by at all times back in high school. Finn didn’t remember much about him, other than he had been the leading of the emo gang who had always slightly terrified Finn if he was honest.
Mrs Organa’s smile widened, “Well Kylo has finally accepted his name’s Ben for the most part, he’s here, I insisted he come and at least show his face. He’s in the gym already.” Leia turning around and picked up a name badge from the small selection laid out on the table, “Here, you have to wear this, it’s awful I know.”
Finn took it and saw his name next to his old high school picture and groaned. Poe looked down at it and smirked, “I knew you’d look adorable.”
Resisting the urge to elbow his boyfriend in the ribs, Finn reluctantly put the badge on, thankful at least that they had used the one from his final year of high school not his first.
“Do you have a ‘Boyfriend of’ badge?” Poe joked, taking his hand momentarily out of Finn’s to slip his arm around his waist and tug him against his hip.
Mrs Organa winked at him, “Unfortunately not, but I may have a ‘Property of’ one, I was gonna give it to my husband later but…” Poe burst out laughing and Finn hid his burning face against his shoulder.
They excused themselves, Mrs Organa promising she’d find them against later, and Finn tried to keep his breathing steady as Poe half-guided him down the corridor towards the gym and all the voices.
“Okay, stay calm, stay calm,” Finn said under his breath.
“I am calm,” Poe replied, glancing at him.
“I was talking to myself.”
Poe snorted and stopped them just before the gym doors. His boyfriend pulled him close and kissed his nose, making Finn squirm but laugh.
“We can leave whenever you want,” Poe told him, “Just say the word and we’ll go – like a safe word.”
Finn rolled his eyes but put his arms around Poe’s neck, threading his fingers into his boyfriend’s thick, wavy dark hair.
“You think you’re so funny, don’t you?” He asked teasingly.
Poe hummed, wrapping his arms around his middle, slipping his hands up beneath Finn’s suit jacket so he could feel the warmth of his body through the thin material of his shirt. “I know I’m funny.”
Finn grinned as Poe closed the small gap between their lips and kissed him tenderly. He had been kissing Poe Dameron for five years now and still he wasn’t bored with it. Every kiss was different, each special in its own right, and they all made his stomach flip and his heart jump. They were both so lost in the kiss that they didn’t notice the gym doors opened and a young woman emerging until she gasped in surprise and exclaimed, “Finn?!”
He couldn’t believe it, it had been years but he would have known that voice anywhere. Finn pulled away from Poe who was blinking in confusion and trying to act cool, straightening his waistcoat and running a hand through his hair.
“Rey?!”
The young woman squealed with excitement and threw herself at Finn, wrapping her arms around him in a grip surprisingly strong for someone with such slender limbs.
“Oh my god, I can’t believe it’s you!” Finn was in total shock.
“I can’t believe you’re here, either!” Rey exclaimed, her eyes shining with tears as she drew back, still holding on to Finn’s shoulders, “I mean, I wished you were going to be, but I wasn’t sure – you maybe being here is the only reason I came tonight and here you are!”
“Here I am,” Finn repeated weakly, looking Rey up and down, “You look great, Rey. It’s so good to see you.”
“I’m so sorry that we lost contact, when we moved life kind of got super crazy…What about you? How have you been? And who is this piece of arm candy I caught you snogging!”
Poe looked slightly taken aback, “Arm candy?”
“This is Poe, my boyfriend –“
“- Told you I needed a badge of my own –“
“ – And I’m good, great actually. We have a place together and I’m an artist – yeah, I know, I actually did it, Rey! I do private commission but hope to maybe one day teach at a college or something.”
“That’s amazing, Finn, I’m so happy for you!” Rey beamed. She took a step back and pulled out her mobile from her coat pocket, “Here, give me your number.”
Finn told her it, still feeling slightly numb that his best friend from high school – only friend really – who he had resigned himself to the fact he would probably never see again, had just burst back into his life.
Poe was taking in Rey’s coat and asked, “Are you leaving?”
Rey’s face fell, “Yes, I got a call – it’s work, I have to go.”
She hugged Finn fiercely once more, “But I just moved back to town and I promise I’m not going anywhere this time.” Finn held her tight against him, fighting the urge to cry, he couldn’t believe it. They said goodbye and he watched her walk away down the corridor, her heeled boots clicking on the polished floor.
“So,” said Poe, retaking Finn’s hand, “That was the friend who moved away?” Still dumbstruck, Finn nodded. “Told you coming here tonight was a good idea.”
He looked at Poe, “You just had to say it, did you?”
Poe smirked and tugged on Finn’s hand, “Come on. Let’s do this.”
They entered the gym and Finn was overwhelmed by the amount of people filling the large space. There were blue decorations everywhere, stars hanging from the ceiling and balloons covering the floor. Tables had been put along one side, piled high with drink and nibbles, and in the middle was a projector shining photos onto a screen, photos of prom and the like. It was all very cheesy, but Finn found himself somewhat impressed.
The people nearest the doors glanced at them as they entered, eyes flickering from Finn to fix on Poe. Finn felt a strange mix of satisfaction and possessiveness. He made an obvious point to lean against Poe’s side and ask purposely close to his ear, “Wanna get a drink?”
“I think that sounds like a great idea,” his boyfriend replied, having to raise his voice over the music that was playing through the speakers in the ceiling. Finn could have sworn they were playing the soundtrack from prom. He found himself lost in reimagining the night if Poe had been his boyfriend back then, how perfect it would have been, as Poe led him by the hand over towards the tables.
Poe released his hand to pour them two glasses of wine and Finn caught the eye of a girl he remembered vividly and stiffened. She was very tall, hulking almost, with short blonde hair and a hard, round face. Her name was Phoebe but she had gone by Phasma; she had been the captain of the girl’s hockey team – ruthless and intimidating. She caught Finn looking at her and narrowed her eyes, folding her arms across her chest.
“Here you go,” Poe said, snapping Finn’s attention away from Phasma as he pressed the wine glass into his hand, “See someone you know?”
“I…” Finn looked back at Phasma but she had turned her back on him, Finn was relieved, “Not anyone I want to talk to, no.”
Poe chuckled, taking a sip of his wine and pulling a face at its cheap quality, Finn was just surprised the school had even supplied alcohol. He shifted back close to Poe as he noticed a group of young woman ogling him from a few feet away. They had been the resident cool girls, every school had their type, perfect in appearance, every straight teenage boys’ fantasy, to Finn they had just been the girls who had always teased him – they could never understand why he didn’t fancy them. Well, they’ll get it now, he thought triumphantly to himself as he leaned in and kissed Poe. He heard them gasp and begin to whisper; he smirked against Poe’s lips and pulled away.
“I know I signed up fully aware for it but,” Poe said, a pink tint to his cheeks, “I’m beginning to feel a little used.”
“Mrs Organa was right,” Finn teased his boyfriend, pecking him on the cheek, “you do need a ‘property of’ badge.”
Poe laughed and put an arm around Finn’s waist. They began to walk slowly around the gym, until they came near the far end when Poe stopped and pointed with his finger of the hand holding his wine glass towards the corner and asked, “Who’s the grim reaper over there?”
Finn looked and saw a tall man standing broodingly against the wall, he had pale skin, a long nose and a mop of black hair. He was dressed in a long black coat which he had fully buttoned up to his chin, despite the heat of the busy room, giving him the ‘grim reaper’ like appearance.
“That’s Kylo – I mean – Ben. Mrs Organa’s son.”
“Really?” Poe raised his eyebrows, “They look nothing alike. She’s all rays of sunshine and he’s lashing rain and teen angst.”
Finn was torn between laughing and being worried Kylo may be able to hear Poe and was about to stride over and murder them both.
“Let’s go say hi,” Poe declared to Finn’s horror.
“Poe, no, wait!” But it was useless and Finn found himself being dragged towards the corner and the scariest boy in high school.
As they approached, another tall man cut in front of them rudely and made a beeline for Kylo. Finn stopped dead and tugged Poe to a halt to, hissing under his breath, “That’s Hux! He was the head prefect. He and Kylo used to hate each other, they had like this feud between them.”
They watched as the tall, ginger man stopped directly in front of Kylo and leaned right into his personal space, seemingly totally undeterred by the black-haired man’s menacing demeanour.
“Well,” said Poe with a smirk in his voice, “It looks like the whole enemies to lovers thing worked for them.”
Finn’s mouth fell open as he watched Kylo reached out and grab a handful of Hux’s shirt and yank him in for what must have been a rough, bruising kiss. Hux pulled back and settled in next to Kylo, leaning against the wall, their shoulders touching.
“Let’s get a little closer,” Poe prompted, pulling Finn towards them once more, “This looks like a conversation I want to overhear.”
Finn could do nothing but scowl as he followed unwillingly after Poe, to resist would be to make a scene and definitely attract Kylo and Hux’s attention. Poe stopped a few feet away from them by a table with a stack of the old year books, he turned his back on Kylo and Hux so he could listen without being caught staring. Finn tried to look busy by picking up one of the year books and flicking through it.
"Look at the decorations!” Kylo was complaining viciously, “Whoever thought that shade of blue was an appropriate colour needs to be shot! This whole evening to depressing enough, it doesn’t need any extra cosmetic help! They totally should have used purple instead, much more fitting."
"Do you need your eyes tested or something? It’s sky blue, what’s depressing about that?” Hux retorted.
“Sure, hey, reach for the sky and all that - your lives are gonna to be great, you’re gonna have super successful careers and shit! Oh wait, no you’re not, coz you had the time to come to this hideously-decorated high school reunion!”
“Was he always a total drama queen?” Poe whispered and Finn nodded, unable to help but smirk.
“You’re here, you know that right?” Hux said, leaning against Kylo.
Kylo grinned, saying in a low voice, “And you know you, you just made my point, right?”
“Promise me we won’t bicker like that till we’re sixty years old,” Poe said, winking at Finn, making him snort in laughter.
Hux glanced in their direction and narrowed his eyes. “Isn’t that - what’s his name?” Kylo was looking towards them now too and Finn felt a jolt of panic shoot through him. He put down the book and reached blindly for Poe’s hand.
“Hey, you,” Kylo called, pushing himself away from the wall and striding towards them, Hux a step behind him. Finn didn’t move but Poe turned around and face the two approaching men without a hint of unease.
“You’re that guy, aren’t you?”
“The freak that never talked, who just spent all day scribbling in his notebook,” Hux mocked and Finn felt his face go hot.
Poe was still standing mostly in front of him and at Hux’s words his back stiffened and he growled dangerously, “Watch what you call him.”
Hux looked Poe up and down then muttered, “And who the fuck are you? You never went to my school.”
“No,” Poe said coolly, taking a step towards Hux, “and it’s a good job too, for if I had you wouldn’t have made it to graduation without a broken nose.”
Kylo caught hold of Hux’s arm and shoved him back a step, forcing his way in between Hux and Poe. He towered over Poe, his eyes furious slits but still Poe held his ground, glaring up into Kylo’s face.
“It’s you who needs to watch your words,” Kylo hissed in a voice so soft it shouldn’t have been anywhere near as menacing as it was.
“Poe,” Finn tried, pulling weakly at his boyfriend’s arm, “Leave it, please, I want to go.”
Hux stepped out from behind Kylo and sneered, “Still a coward after all these years, Finn.”
Finn stiffened and Poe put down his wine glass. There was a moment of stillness where all four of them glowered at one another, then Finn whispered, “I’m not a coward. You were just never worth fighting.”
“Boys!” They all jumped as Mrs Organa appeared, a fake smile on her face and eyes swirling dangerously, “Just because tonight it’s your high school reunion doesn’t mean you have to act like you did at high school! You’re all grown men now, not children!”
Hux looked uneasy and he stared down at the floor, while Kylo’s face was blank.
“Ben,” Leia fixed her son with a withering look, “Hux. If neither of you are going to apologise you might as well just leave now.”
Kylo looked like that was fine by him but Hux muttered, “I didn’t mean anything by what I said.”
“Don’t talk to me, talk to Finn and Poe!” Leia snapped, putting her hands on her hips, “And does didn’t sound like an apology to me!”
Hux shifted awkwardly on his feet and looked sharply at Poe then at Finn, growling, “I take back what I said. I’m sorry.”
Finn literally felt like he was back in high school. Yet the apology, though forced and he doubted heartfelt, did make Hux’s words sting a little less.
“Ben, Hux, come with me, you can help me hand out food,” Leia ordered and Finn watched two of the people who had made his high school years hell be frog-marched off by Mrs Organa.
“Well they were arseholes,” Poe growled, glaring after them. Finn looked at his boyfriend and was overwhelmed with gratitude and tears sprung into his eyes.
“I wish I had had you back then,” he whispered, blinking back the tears. Poe noticed and immediately pulled him into his arms. Finn buried his face into the crook of Poe’s neck and wrapped his arms around his back. His boyfriend kissed his head and rubbed a soothing hand over his body, hugging him tight.
“I’m proud of you,” he murmured, his words ghosting over the shell of Finn’s ear, “For what you said to Hux.”
Finn lifted his head and met Poe’s eyes, “I told you, you make me brave.”
Poe smiled gently, leaning in and resting his forehead against Finn’s, “Time to leave?”
“Yes, take me home,” Finn whispered, pressing a thankful kiss to his boyfriend’s lips. Poe returned the kiss for a moment then drew back and told Finn’s hand, guiding him away from his past and towards their future.