Chapter Text
Ratio was used to being disliked. Even from his youth, most of his peers disliked his blunt attitude. It was to be expected. An 8-year-old child couldn’t handle the harsh truth of his words and even some of his students.
He didn’t mind that people disliked him. Friends only got in his way of achieving his goal. They were just roadblocks, making him have to recount his steps to explain things to them. Besides, no friend of his could ever match his level.
“Doctor, do you ever think you could love someone?” a woman that was supposed to help him on his current project asked.
She didn’t help him at all. All she did was ask totally unrelated questions that made him lose his patience. Idiocy. The hardest disease to cure, but he was determined to find a cure for it and spread his knowledge.
“I’m not interested in romantic feelings,” Ratio responded. It was a pointless feeling that brought nothing to his goals. All it would be was a setback. He couldn’t let himself be a setback. If he were to prolong the steps to cure idiocy, it meant another day of students wasting their potential.
“Ah, that’s a shame. There was this lady I thought you’d enjoy the company of,” the woman sighed. Was she trying to set him up with her friend?
Ratio just ignored her and continued on his portion of the research. Sadly, he had to let the woman do her half and he couldn’t do it for her. He always dreaded collaborating with fools who tried to pretend to know what they were doing and instead just wasted more time.
The woman worked diligently, but she got off topic way too much. She asked him about his preference for romance. He didn’t have the time to think about romance, but he remembered he despised it as a child.
Perhaps it was just his mind forcing himself to hate any care others gave him because of his upbringing. People only cared about his achievements in his youth. If he wasn’t at the top, he’d be reduced to nothing. It was rare that Ratio ever felt his parents genuinely care for him. All they wanted from him was success.
Without all his achievements, no one would bother to care. Even with his achievements, he still lacked the gaze of Nous to be a member of the Genius Society. That goal wasn’t as important to him as it was when he was younger, but it was still a harsh thought he had. If he wasn’t worthy of the aeon’s gaze, did his achievements actually mean something?
“Dr. Ratio, I finished my half of the research. When do you want to meet up again for collaboration?” the woman asked. Ratio turned his head to look at her. He wasn’t expecting her to speak up. At least she didn’t notice his expression. After all, he was wearing the alabaster head, so she wouldn’t be able to see it, anyway.
“Next week, same time.”
The woman nodded and left. Finally, Ratio had some time alone. Perhaps he could take a bath or read a book in his downtime. Although, he probably needed to buy some new books soon. He had already read most of the books that were scattered in his study. Some he even read more than once.
It would prolong his stay around others, but he wanted to get a few new books to add to his collection. The feeling of turning the pages to a new book was a feeling Ratio enjoyed.
Although, Ratio didn’t go to get more books. Instead, he went home and tried to fix more of his research to make sure he understood what he was saying properly. He put a few hours already into it, but creeping behind him was a fear that he kept down from his childhood.
Ratio himself understood it, but sometimes he struggled to explain his ideas to people. It was rare he found himself stumbling over his wording now, but it was a possibility. To him, it was a very simple concept to grasp, but he knew he wasn’t like most people. Others would have a harder time grasping the complex topics he understood.
Once he arrived home, he took a quick bath to calm his mind. He was just overthinking it. Everything would be fine. It wouldn’t be a repeat of all the prior times in his youth. He was above that now, hopefully. Maybe? He hoped so, but he wasn’t fully aware if he changed or not about that attribute.
Ratio looked at the nearby shelf with some rubber ducks on the shelf. His actions with rubber ducks looked childish, and he didn’t even know why he liked the ducks. Perhaps he was just trying to heal his inner child from long ago.
The bath was a way to calm his body and mind, yet all he felt was the dread that came with the reminders of his mother’s expectations and his father’s views.
“Ratio, get back to studying. You may know the topic, but there’s no harm in knowing it more.”
“You’re wasting your talent if you just lounge around. You may know it, but you should expand more on it to impress others. Don’t let me down.”
Ratio nodded and sighed, making his way back to his room and grabbed another book he was reading.
He paused his bath preparations and sighed. A little more research wouldn’t hurt much. He just needed a better understanding so he could explain it to the woman. That’s all he needed. It would only be a few more minutes of research. By then, Ratio most definitely put in more work into it than the woman. A few minutes of fact checking turned into an hour of annoyance.
Once he was satisfied with his work, he picked up a book from his many shelves and walked back to the bathroom. Now was the time for a perfect and relaxing bath with his rubber ducks. Finally, time to his own thoughts without interruptions from the inner voice of his parents’ expectations.
He relaxed down into the bathtub, letting his body sink into the water. The warm water relaxed his muscles. With closed eyes, he escaped to his mind where he’d just be alone with just his thoughts alone.
Ratio stepped out of the bath, hearing his mother call to him again. He drained the water and dried himself. Of course, she needed something from him. There was the possibility that she would just yell at him for questioning her from earlier in the day.
He quickly got dressed in his pajamas and looked at himself in the mirror for a few moments. He shrugged off any thoughts about his father. How he looked a lot more like his father than his mother was something he disliked, but that was just how genetics worked.
He exited the bathroom and made his way down the stairs to the dining room where his mother was. If he had the choice, he would stay in his room away from his parents, but then that would just make him more alike to his father.
“What do you need?” Ratio asked his mother. He looked at the dinner table, noticing the spot his father sat was once again empty.
“Can you bring your father his food?” she asked. Ratio nodded and grabbed the plate of food.
Making his way back upstairs, Ratio sighed as he held the plate of food. He knocked on the door two times, then waited for the sound of the floorboards creaking before opening the door.
His father looked at him with an unamused expression, taking the plate away from Ratio and returning back to his work. He closed the door and Ratio sighed.
Ratio would prefer to eat alone too, just so he didn’t have to hear his mother pester him about what he should do with his knowledge. He was already the best in his class, what more could she possibly want from him?
The dinner table was silent as Ratio stared at his food for a while. He wanted to eat, but he didn’t want to look up and see his mother’s disapproving look.
“Veritas, aren’t you going to eat?” his mother asked.
Ratio couldn’t make out if she was genuinely concerned or if she was just asking him so she could degrade him for not being better than he was.
“I will,” Ratio responded with a sigh. He took a few bites before his mother spoke up again.
“You know, you should talk to others more often. It’d be good for you. You don’t want to be a hermit like your father, do you?”
Ratio rolled his eyes at her comment. He took a few more bites before standing up.
“I’m heading to bed,” he said and walked off.
Ratio sighed as he made his way to his bedroom. He remembered how often his mother would call him out from there in his youth, constantly comparing him to his much lazier father.
Now living on his own, Ratio’s room reminded himself of his father’s. Although Ratio had a separate room for all his books, the ones he wanted to read before going to bed or during a bath were on the two bookshelves in his room.
He grabbed a random book from the shelf and placed it on his nightstand. If he woke up earlier than he intended, then he’d read it until his alarm went off. He closed his eyes and dozed off to sleep.