Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

With an all too familiar hiss, it started again.

Stale cold air met his nostrils when Mark opened his eyes. He groaned, deep and throaty. His mind fogged, like an early morning mist. Slowly, he blinked to consciousness. Then quickly, he decided he was too tired for this. He closed his eyes again, leaned back, and prepared to fall asleep again when-

“Good morning, Head Engineer.”

Mark’s eyes flashed open. He stumbled forward, crashing into the door of his cryopod. It stayed firm under his weight. The ship's computer spat words at his misty mind.

The screen pressed against his face began listing out what the computer was spouting at him. He shoved himself off the door, legs wobbly, and scanned blurry eyes over the text on the screen.

Reports of the ship’s condition flashed before his eyes. All was well with the colony; their cryopods were functioning as intended, and life support systems were active. The Captain and crew were all in stable condition, same conditions as the colonists. The crew were scheduled to wake up soon. The Captain should’ve woken up alongside him, but their cryopod seemed to give them an extra few minutes.

Nothing had gone horribly wrong. Not this time.

Right.

This wasn’t the first time he was waking up from cryo sleep. He’d awoken here before, in various stages of panic (more times than he actually remembered).

After last awakening, Mark hadn’t anticipated ever waking up here again, confined to this cold tomb. Back to this ugly part of him he had been so sure he left behind in the chilly fingers of space. He thought he'd left for good, but it seems that Mark couldn’t escape his past after all. For as much as he wanted to take all he’d done and completely forget about it, he’d never be able to escape it. One more time. One more time to not completely mess things up for his… for the Captain.

He couldn’t mess this up again.

Not again.

He couldn’t hurt the Captain again. That’s what all of this was for, to try and keep them from hurting. He’d never let them hurt again.

Never. Never again.

The screen flashed with an exclamation point, and the text beneath indicated that his blood pressure had spiked. A sarcastic comment passed, before the computer offered him a few ways to remedy the issue. Mark shook his head and pressed at the screen. The Captain’s cryopod was set to open any minute now…

"I'm fine," He said, forcing a grin. His lips felt like weights. "Do me a favor? Make sure the Captain doesn't wake up for another few minutes."

Mark didn't know how he could feel judged by a computer of all things, but there was a lapse in their conversation and the pit in his stomach tugged hard. A few more seconds, and Mark opened his mouth to address it.

Finally, the computer spoke up, "Captain's cryo pod delayed for ten minutes. Any more time and-"

"Yeah, yeah, just check in with the others."

The computer didn't bid him adieu. Rather, just abruptly left Mark in deafening silence.

He let out a breath. Each wormhole took more and more from him, each one adding a weight to his shoulders. He leaned back against the cushioned metal wall, easing the pressure on his legs. He didn’t know if he could push his way out of the cryopod yet. Mark wanted to rest. He didn’t deserve it, not after all he’s done, but in his selfishness, all of his heartless selfishness, he couldn’t bring himself to leave the pod just yet. Instead, he slid down, down, down, until he was sitting.

Mark took a breath. His skin was fuzzy like TV static.

What had he done?

The last loop, he had been so certain was the final one. A year had gone by, and everything seemed perfect. People were building their new lives on their new planet. The Captain had led them to somewhere wonderful, a paradise so wonderful as their first colonizing mission.  The colony was doing so well, and now they were back at square one.

A bolt of pain hit his nose.

Mark flinched, covering his nose with both hands. Damn, the Captain could throw a punch when they wanted to. Which… only reminded him of when he laid his disgusting hands on them, angry with intention to harm. Had they really wanted to, they could've fought back. But they didn't. He was stupid. He should've known the Captain wasn't at fault for this. He wanted to feel like a hero, but he ended up being his own worst enemy.

I built the warp core.

It was a revelation that Mark dwelled on for so long.

Which, admittedly, wasn't long. What was a year compared to an eternity? But it took him far too long to realize his mistakes. His horrible errors ruined his relationship with the Captain.

He thought he had been the one to fix it after the Captain destroyed it, that he was saving everyone by fixing the Captain's mistakes.

But the Captain hadn't made any mistakes.

He had.

Mark made the mistake of doubting the Captain, his best friend and colleague for as long as he could remember. He had lost all faith in them. He was more than sure they had never lost it in him.

And the worst part?

Mark had hurt the Captain - in many, many ways.

The warp core had been destroyed, and he was convinced the Captain hadn't retained any of those memories. He had considered himself grateful for that. He had a chance to do better, to be better, and earn the respect he didn't feel he deserved. The best part about that idea was the fact that the Captain wouldn't have to deal with the pain.

But he should've known the universe wasn't so forgiving.

He should've known.

But he assumed the best, wanted to believe that the Captain wasn't suffering, and ended up neglecting the most important person in his life by following that naive assumption.

And when Mark saw the tears in their eyes, he knew they hadn't forgotten.

Not only had they not forgotten, but there were hundreds of universes he didn’t know about. That the Captain had to suffer through, all because he tricked his Captain into trusting him. That was a mistake. He shouldn’t have been trusted.

He needed to make it right.

He was going to fix it.

And what a fool he was to believe that.

Mark just kept making mistakes, and maybe that was just what Mark did.

Mark made mistakes.

And, just like every time before this, Mark made the mistake of leaving his cryopod.

The Captain had a headache.

Standing in front of the window, admiring their new home from the bridge, the Captain wanted nothing more than to lay down and ease the pounding in their skull. They should’ve been excited, seeing all of their hard work pay off. Even when Mark stood to their right, his wide eyes scanning over the pink-tinted planet as if he’d never seen anything more extraordinary.

Well… he probably hadn't. The universe was so vast, and humanity was only beginning to uncover its wonders.

Of course, perhaps they'd be in the same shock and awe as their head engineer if it wasn't for the consistent thump thump thump of a jackhammer against their skull.

The Captain had awoken like this, hardly taking one step from their cryopod before stumbling. The room had spun, their legs like jelly. Felt as if they had been pulled apart and stretched a hundred times over. If it weren’t for Mark, they would’ve fallen to their death.

Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration, but from the looks that they’d gotten from the crew, they might as well have almost fallen to their death. Cryostasis had taken a toll on their body, and Celci told them that it was a normal side effect of it. She affirmed them that the symptoms would ease over the next few twenty-four-hour cycles, so they would be fine.

And, of course, they trusted Celci.

Their crew had their back, no matter what.

A soft voice broke through their thoughts.

"Thank you… for not giving up on me."

The Captain blinked, their focus on the incoming planet derailed by Mark's sudden intrusion.

They turned to face the Head Engineer, who gave a sad soft smile. He held out an extra coffee. They took it, examining Mark as he turned to face the window.

"Why would I give up on you?" They signed.

Mark's mouth hung agape. It opened and closed, before a soft breath escaped him, and a crease of a smirk pulled his lip up. He took a long sip of his coffee, "Have we been here before? Do you remember?"

What are you talking about? The Captain crunched their eyebrows together and shook their head.

Mark's shoulders relaxed. His gaze flickered down to their left hand. He smiled, "Good… good. I wasn't too sure, ya know?"

Weirdo.

The Captain returned their gaze to the planet. They knew they should be moving, gathering data and managing the crew, but exhaustion weighed heavy on their eyelids and they wanted nothing more than to fall asleep. Cryo sleep took more out of them than they thought.

“I’ve dreamt of this moment, you know,” Mark sighed, his hands clasped over his mug as he swirled the dark liquid around. His eyes were no longer on the planet, focused entirely on his cup. “The day we finally make it.”

“I’ve imagined it too,” They signed. “I can’t believe we made it.”

Mark smiled. The muscles in his face tensed as if his lips were a weight to hold. Then, he turned back to the planet, and watched in blissful silence.

Well, as blissful as being the heads of the ship could be.

“Oh, by the way, here,” Mark held out a piece of paper-

“DON’T WAKE THE CAPTAIN.”

The Captain blinked. It was a progress report.

“I had it taped to your cryopod in case I wasn’t here when you woke up,” Mark averted his gaze, “I… would always be there, so I don’t even know what I was thinking, really.”

I would always be there.

The Captain smiled, expression softening, before grasping the progress report. Mark exhaled, his dark eyes flicking over to them. He softened, the tenseness of his features fading slightly as he met their smile. The two of them stood in silence together, connected by the thin sheet of paper.

“Unless… you didn’t want it? I… I can tell you the summarized version…” Mark extended a hand, his fingers twitching as he pulled back, and then reached forward again, a split second of hesitation. Just before he made contact-

“Captain!”

Mark and the Captain both jumped at the sudden intrusion. The two of them turned to find three incoming crew members, Celci, Gunther, and Burt.

Celci reviewed that the wakey-wakey protocol did not activate prematurely and that they had in fact made it to the planet ahead of schedule. The Captain gestured out the window that had their new planet in full display. Gunther gave a loud yell about being the first to gun down any threats on their new home. The three of them discussed the current situations in cryostasis and the Asteroid Defense System: all systems were up and running. When Celci and Gunther departed, Burt gave the Captain a firm nod. The engine was in top shape. The Captain gave him an abbreviated salute and Burt departed to his station.

Mark and the Captain were dragged in different ways. Confirming systems were online, checking in with each department. The next few days would be spent organizing colony preparations, affirming scouts, and making sure everything was in tip-top shape before making any moves toward the planet. All colonists were alive and well and, a few Mark-induced accidents later, all systems were stable.

Though it was noted by some of the crew that some systems had looked tampered with, but a thorough analysis showed no disruption to the systems. The Captain noted this.

The first day was always the hardest, they told themself, even if technically, it wasn’t the first day. According to the calendar, they had spent a month and a half in cryo sleep. It would likely take many more months before they could even think of sending someone down onto the planet, then several more to start building outposts so they could wake up some of their colonists. Not all of the colonists, a hundred thousand was far too many to wake up at once, but some of the colonists with tasks that would be used on the planet. More biologists, architects, scientists. People vital to the success of this colony, then they would start releasing other colonists.

That was the plan. It felt so close, seeing the planet in their window as they wound down for the day. But yet, when mapped on paper, it was so desperately far.

The Captain parted from their window, closing the shutters, then undressed from their captain’s uniform. Approaching a tablet at their desk, they pressed a button labeled, Status of Colonists.

“All colonists stable.”

Good, good, the Captain thought as they draped their coat over the desk chair. Another look at the tablet. Status of the Crew.

A moment. “Gunther B. Gunnerson. Condition: Stable.”

Okay, that’s good. Next person. The Captain pressed the next button on the tablet screen.

A moment. “Celcionna F. Kelvina. Condition: Stable.”

Awesome. Next person.

A moment. “Burt. Condition: Stable.”

On a roll. The process went a tad bit faster as they finished their before-bed routine. (There was a lot more crew than they realized). Everyone seemed okay after a full day of work after cryo sleep. One more person to check.

A moment. “Head Engineer Mark. Condition…” The computer stopped.

The Captain paused. They waited a moment. Maybe the ship was just double checking some numbers. (Why would it need to double check anything? Was Mark okay?)

After a long moment of waiting, still no response. The Captain couldn’t help but frown. Okay. That was weird. They just saw Mark this morning after they woke up from cryo sleep. What could be inhibiting the ship from checking Mark’s vitals? It wasn’t like the ship could ignore their command. The Captain and Mark were the only ones able to make changes to the ship’s commands, and neither of them changed the commands. With a huff, the Captain leaned over the tablet and tried again.

Once again, the same response.

The Captain sighed. Okay. So, Mark’s vitals were malfunctioning. That needed to be resolved. Not being able to read the vitals of the crew could be dangerous, especially on a ship this big. On a ship this large, everyone needed to be accounted for. Accidents, however rare, were not to be taken lightly. As the Captain, their job was to maintain the health and safety of crew and colonists.

Request: Head Engineer to Captain’s Quarters.

“Request sent. Request denied.”

Denied? Mark denied their request? That was… weird. Usually. He’d jump at the opportunity to greet them. Maybe he was busy? The Captain rubbed their chin.

Why!?

“Mark’s Comment: No comment.”

Dammit! The Captain huffed. They leaned over the tablet and sent a message to Mark’s tablet, “Mark, report to my quarters by tomorrow morning. I will send Burt to bring you here if not.”

The Captain pulled their pajamas on and crashed into their mattress. They were annoyed that Mark rejected their request, but that was a morning captain problem. Right now, this mattress was more comfortable than that cryo pod they’d been sleeping in the past month and a half. They sank into the plush material and gave a weighty sigh.

Tomorrow was another day.

The Captain fell into a deep slumber.

They weren’t the Captain yet.

It was years before they’d even get to step foot on another spaceship, but they laid on the fake grass, arms crossed behind their head and looked through the top of the dome entrapping them on the moon base.

They were fresh meat; a graduate student fresh out of undergrad, eyes wide and willing to take on the universe.

And little did they know what their future looked like…

They were in their early twenties, twenty-two, twenty-three, somewhere around there. The longer one spent in space, the harder it became to keep track of the days, even if there were calendars around the base. Sometimes it was easier not to pay attention to the passing days. Especially not since they were already halfway through their first semester and had a million midterms and projects coming up. Easier not to pay attention to the time when neck deep in assignments.

They thought it was their birthday today. They got a few birthday wishes in passing, but sometimes they’d get those early, sometimes later. Roughly their birthday. Maybe the week of. Who knows.

A spaceship shuttled overhead. They gave a wave to the vessel, and the ship flashed its lights.

(Space is so cool).

They grinned, resting back against the cool grass. The dome was a part of the artificial park the moon base had, connecting all parts of the moon base to one another. It was later in the schedule, likely around midnight on Earth. Which meant they had an hour until curfew. They had gotten out of their leadership course an hour ago, and, with nothing to do, they wandered until they got here.

Mark was still in class, one of his ship-building classes. He was always excited about that one.

Without much else to do until the morning, they continued to gaze out at the stars, finding constellations and other planets in the distance. They counted how many they knew from the top of their head, roughly five hundred and seventy, until their thoughts drifted and they simply watched as ships passed and satellites spun in the distance.

“Hey!”

In their vision emerged a certain engineering student. Mark grinned down at them, holding a couple of textbooks in his arms. They caught the names: Engineering 500, Shipbuilding for Dummies, Advanced Calculus, Yearly Agenda. They spared him a grin, “Hey.”

Their voice came out scratchy and small. They cleared their throat. Mark’s face twisted. “Oh, I forgot about that.”

“It’s fine,” They croaked, pushing themselves up on their elbows, then into a sit. “It was- It was an accident.”

“That doesn’t make me feel any better about what happened,” Mark lowered himself to his knees, worried lines pressed into the smoothness of his skin. He was pale, likely from staying inside studying. He was younger, twenty-four, no beard, baby cheeks not quite gone yet. His hair was chopped short. He frowned, “I can do enough talking for the both of us. You’re taking that sign language class, right?”

They managed a sloppy sign, “Yes.”

“I don’t know what that means, but I’m going to assume that means yes,” Mark laughed, strained. They chuckled then patted the grass next to them, moving their bag out of the way. Mark sat down next to them, placing his bag and books down. The two of them sat in silence while they watched the stars. Soon, Mark said, “I’m sorry it took me so long to hang with you today. I’ve been busy with that new vessel.”

They shook their head, waving a hand that signaled for him not to worry about it. Mark rolled his eyes, “No, no, it’s your birthday today! I wasn’t about to let it pass without wishing you a happy birthday! Plus, I got you something!”

Mark dug into his bag and pulled out a box, taking up most of the bag space. No wonder he was carrying his textbooks. They frowned at him, flicking their gaze between the gift and his textbooks. Mark gave them a shove, “Stop it. I know what you’re thinking, but I’ve only been carrying those around for half a day.”

“That’s not-” They coughed into their palm, squinting their eyes against the pain in their throat. Mark cringed in their peripherals. “That’s not any better, Mark.”

“Shush,” Mark nudged their shoulder with his, pushing the box into their hands. “Just take the damn thing! Don’t open it yet though, There’s something else.”

“Okay,” They said, resting it in their lap.

Mark shoved his textbooks haphazardly into his bag and pulled something out of his agenda. It was thick, like cardstock, folded into a card. Brightly colored and had some words on it, but they couldn’t read it from here. Mark peered inside of the card, then quickly shut it. He turned to them, barely containing a grin. He handed over the card. They took it from him. Examining the front of the card was…

It was a picture… of Mark’s face. In letters above Mark’s face was the word happy, and below it was happy birthday. And when the flipped it open, it was just a collage of Mark’s face with various different fonts reading happy birthday.

They deadpanned, “Mark-”

“Shh, shh, shh,” Mark’s hands covered their mouth. “Open your gift first before you judge me!”

They groaned. Mark pulled back, resting his chin on his knees and swaying excitedly. They opened the box in their lap and pulled out its contents.

It was a mug.

World’s Best Dad Captain.

“That cup speaks wisdom, you know,” Mark laughed. “But I guess I should have said Universe’s Best Captain, huh? I custom ordered it from a company on Earth. That being said, there is a note in there that says ‘made with love’ so just pretend I made it.”

They rolled their eyes, grasping the cup in both their hands. It fit nicely in their hands, just the right size for their comfort. They gave Mark an affectionate smile, “Thank you.”

Mark smiled back, then turned back to the stars. They took in their new gift as a wave of comfortable silence fell over them. Had Mark really had this planned since they were on Earth about two months ago? Mark wasn’t really known for planning that far ahead. Last year, Mark gave them a half-eaten burrito that they had put in their dorm room freezer because the training engineer had been busy working on his spaceship design to properly go out and shop for a gift.

It was the thought that counted, and they could tell he was freaking out about almost missing their birthday.

“I heard you were assigned to command that… uh, what’s it called?” Mark bounced his leg on the grass, biting his lip as he thought of what he was referring to. They sat, watching and waiting for him to remember on his own. They knew what he was talking about. Mark snapped his fingers in a sort of eureka! moment. “Right! The spacewalk squad! That’d make you a… commander? Right, Commander! Man, that’s so cool! I wanna go out into space. I mean, I know we’re on the literal moon! But… I wanna be out there. Soon though, right? I’m gonna be the best damn engineer you’ve ever seen!”

“Damn right!” The Commander punched his arm. Mark laughed. He punched them back.

After a bit of banter, the two students gazed at the stars.

The Commander didn’t get to see Mark often. The two of their schedules overlapped too much and the most they could get was maybe lunch on Wednesdays. Most days they were simply too tired to hang out, crashing into bed. Whoever woke up first made breakfast, so they took alternating days to make breakfast, but even on weekends, both were engaged in their respective programs, the Commander in leadership, Mark in engineering. It wasn’t often they got to hang out like this. But it was always worth it. Even if they missed him.

“I’m gonna build you a ship, Commander.”

The Commander blinked, turning their head towards Mark. He was no longer staring at the stars. He was staring at them. “Hm?”

“A ship. All your own. You could do whatever you wanted with it, go anywhere in the entire universe. The best, top of the line materials,” Mark’s smile grew as he went on. The Commander swallowed. “It’s gonna be invincible! You’re gonna be the captain; you’re gonna take us to infinite and beyond!”

Mark gazed at them, as if they were the most amazing thing in the universe. Even when he had been watching the stars overhead with untarnished amazement, he looked at them, wide eyes, just as passionately as he had ever talked about space. He talked about them like he talked about space, unabashedly and full of child-like wonder.

The Commander couldn’t help the flush rising on their cheeks. They ducked their head from Mark’s rosy cheeks. They wondered if he realized what he was doing, or if he was just being Mark.

“That’s what you’ve always wanted, right?” Mark said, taking their hand. They couldn’t help but turn to him, lips parted, trying to speak but unable. He smiled at them, so gently, as if it only came so naturally, so effortlessly to smile at them, “You’ve always talked about how you wanted to command a ship, to explore the cosmos? Well, I’m gonna give it to you. Just you wait!”

The Commander chuckled. They squeezed Mark’s hand, then leaned back against the grass. Mark followed. The two students laid in the grass together, simply, silently. Nothing was said between them, only the occasional squeeze of reassurance. They didn’t doubt that Mark would hand them the entire universe if only they asked, and if only he asked, the Commander would do the same. A ship was only one of many things that the Commander wanted, but they’d settle for much less than that if only Mark was by their side.

A horn blared in the distance.

“Shit!”

Mark and the Commander scrambled to their feet. Mark swore under his breath as the two gathered their belongings and sprinted out of the courtyard. A guard stood at the entrance of the dorms, arms crossed and deadpanning, “You two know the curfew. We shouldn’t have to keep reminding you.”

Mark and the Commander mumbled apologies to the guard as they closed off access to the courtyard.

The guard sealed the bulkhead before they turned back to the students, “I won’t tell anyone. Just get back to your rooms before you get caught again. Commander, be more careful. It’d be a shame if you got kicked from your leadership studies before you could get anywhere with it.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Leave.”

Mark and the Commander rushed upstairs to their dorm. They flicked on the lights, dimming them to give them just enough room to see but not completely blind them, and put away their belongings in their respective rooms.

“I can’t believe I forgot about curfew,” Mark huffed, flopping on their mattress as they replaced the textbooks for tomorrow’s classes. They shot him a look that he gave the cold shoulder. “I, like, never forget curfew.”

“Yes, you do,” The Commander shrugged. They cleared their throat, “Well, they're is always lenient on us. I’m sure it’s… it’s fine.”

Something in Mark’s expression shifted. He didn’t respond. He only turned away and wandered to the kitchen. The Commander set their bag their desk chair, laid their uniform over the flat of the desk, and prepared for bed. When they entered the bathroom, Mark trailed in after them. The two brushed their teeth together, maintained skin care, and other basic necessities were dealt with before the two left. The Commander went to their room, and Mark lingered outside the door.

“Commander?”

They faced him. He stared at the floor, his hair dangling in front of his eyes. “Do you… mind if I spend the night in your room?”

The Commander smiled gently, then beckoned him in. He entered, shutting the door behind him, and slipped under the covers as they shut off the lights. They slipped into bed next to Mark. “Everything okay?” They whispered.

“Tired… it’s been a long day.”

“That’s okay,” The Commander rubbed Mark’s arm. “I’m here now.”

Mark’s expression softened. He curled his arms around the Commander’s form and rested on their chest, taking in their warmth. The Commander held him, rubbing a hand through his hair.

“Have you spoken to Celci or Gunther since we left space camp?” The Commander asked, breaking through the silence.

“No, no, I have talked to Burt though. He’s in my engineering class!” Mark grinned at them. “He’s said that Celci and Gunther are going to the same graduate school though.”

“That’s cool. What are they doing?”

Mark shrugged, “Dunno. Celci’s doing something with that cryogenic tech she was constantly on about during space camp. And Gunther… well, he’s working in technology too. Programming, I think. Boring.”

The Commander scoffed, pinching Mark’s side. He yipped, smacking their hand away. “I thought it was interesting. Cooler than what I’m doing.”

“Nuh-uh!” Mark made a show of hitting the mattress. “You’re taking all those leadership classes. I could never. You have a way with people. I just… annoy people. Everyone admires you so much. And you’re smart. You may not be specializing in some stupid cryo-whatever, or programming, but it takes a special person to take control of a ship. And look how good you’re doing now.”

The Commander swallowed. “Yeah.”

The darkness drew the silence between them. The Commander listened. The heater booted up with a hum, the clock on the wall ticked. The looming of the morning was almost tangible, but they held Mark tighter and ignored the dread.

“I’m going to be dropping from my gym class,” Mark mumbled, tracing the collar of their shirt.

The Commander shook their head, “Don’t.”

“Why? I’m going to be enrolling in your sign language class,” Mark said. “I’m gonna need it, aren’t I? After what I did, it’s the least I can do.”

“It wasn’t your fault, Mark.”

Mark didn’t say anything. He just tightened his grasp on the Commander and squeezed as tightly as he could. The Commander didn’t say anything either, hoping their friend understood that the accident wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was an accident. It was just an accident. Hopefully he understood that and wasn’t blaming himself for things he had no control over.

As Mark fell asleep in their arms, they heard him murmur, “No matter what happens, you will always be my Captain.”

Knock! Knock! Knock!

The Captain groaned.

Whatever time it was simply too early.

The Captain rolled over in their mattress, flicking their gaze to the clock. Five AM.

Yes. Yes. The exact time they didn’t want to see on their alarm clock. Great. Great. I don’t wanna get up. But as Captain of the Invincible II - was that dramatic music in the background? - they had to get up and tend to their duties. They sighed, tossing their blanket to the side, and rose. They crossed the room, reached the door, and reluctantly opened it.

Before them stood Mark, as bright as ever. They wondered, idly, how this man could be so excited at such an early hour, but then they remembered his special interest of space, and suddenly it made sense. It seemed not even cryo sleep could take their engineer down. They could only smile.

“Hi, Mark!” They signed.

“Hey, Captain!” Mark said. The hum of the ship combined with the light chatter of the early morning crew emanated behind him.

The Captain took a breath, swaying as they rubbed the sleep from their eyes. “Did you need anything?”

“Oh, no, nothing. I just came to greet you this morning. I brought coffee,” Mark said, nudging the beverage into their hands. They took it graciously, immediately bringing the hot liquid to their lips and taking in the warmth and caffeine. Oh, Mark, you lifesaver. They examined the mug.

The mug had the words World's Best Dad written on the side, except Dad was crossed out and underneath it was the bold word Captain.

World’s Best Captain. The Captain smirked, meeting Mark’s gaze as he grinned goofily.

“That cup speaks wisdom, you know,” Mark said, turning and pulling his own cup to his lips. “I found it in one of my storage containers.”

The Captain rolled their eyes, shaking their head in a sarcastically disapproving manner, and took a sip from their mug. “Ass kisser.”

“The best,” Mark chuckled, swiftly dodging a punch to the arm. “So, Captain. You wanted to meet with me?”

Oh. Right.

The Captain tapped at their arm band, then at the tablet on the desk. “Head Engineer condition status blocked,” the tablet said.

Something flashed across Mark’s features. Too quick to recognize; it was there, then gone. Mark rubbed a hand over his face, “Oh… uh… My equipment has been on the fritz since last night. I’ve put in a work order, but there’s so much going on. One lousy computer isn’t that important, right?”

“You’re the Head Engineer. Your equipment needs to work.”

“Right,” Mark scratched at his scalp. The lines in his face were more pronounced than usual, the bags under his eyes dark, like the color of his eyes drained into them. “I’ll get on that right away. Did you need anything else, Captain?”

The Captain gave the briefest shake of their head. Mark smiled. It didn’t reach his eyes. As he went to turn, the Captain reached out, taking the sleeve of his jumpsuit. Mark paused.

“Sit with me,” the Captain signed, jerking their head inside.

As the Captain backed away, leaving room for entry, Mark didn’t move. His gaze fluttered between them, the floor, and his coffee. He was hesitating.

Hesitating, as if he wouldn’t have bounded into the Captain’s arms before they parted so many years ago. His smile always as warm as the sun on their skin. The Captain remembered waking to his smile for so many mornings, after late nights studying for exams and had to wake up early for class. Even if it was for a brief moment in passing, whether one of them was leaving or going, it was always there. Always warm.

The Captain sighed. They didn’t know how they made it so far without him.

The Captain held out their hand. Mark took it eagerly, the hesitance gone now that they squeezed his palm.

Mark stepped into the room, door sliding shut behind him, and followed the Captain to the window seats. A small table in front of them where they placed down their drinks, and they sat next to each other. From here, they could see the planet, its pinkish-blue hues radiating throughout the atmosphere. Mark sighed contently, sinking into the cushions.

The Captain leaned into the love seat, their gaze drifting over to where Mark sat.

“Spaaace…” Mark mumbled.

The Captain only smiled, shaking their head. It would only be a matter of time before they had to leave and attend to their jobs, but this short moment of peace meant more than they imagined it would.

Outside of the Captain’s arrival onto the Invincible, they hadn’t seen Mark since graduate school. Roughly five or six years of absolutely nothing from Mark, then randomly, an invitation to become the Captain of the Invincible II.

(Cue dramatic music).

The Captain didn’t question where Mark had heard that they had stepped down from their previous position. He had to have heard from one of their friends – Celci, Gunther, or Burt – or else he would have never known. Because not even a week after their old position, Mark had sent them the query: Want to start a colony with me?

And, even to this day, the Captain would follow Mark to the end of the universe.

Mark sighed. The Captain raised their chin. Without turning to look at them, Mark rested his head on the Captain’s shoulder. The Captain reciprocated, their cheek pressing into Mark’s hair. He was warm. His hair was soft, smelled like the cheap soap they had brought onto the ship. Mark kept moving, pushing his body into theirs until they both were lying down on the love seat, Mark draped over his Captain’s form.

The Captain threaded their fingers through his hair.

“Does this count as fraternizing with my coworkers?”

Mark snorted, shaking his head in disapproval. He sighed into their collarbone, “Nah. Just cuddles.”

With a grin, the Captain relaxed into Mark’s grasp. He clung to them, clung like any light breeze would take them away from him. Like their last interaction before parting ways.

For a moment, it felt as if nothing had changed. All was right in the universe.

The Captain shivered.

The smell of the coolant leak filled the air of the cryo room, and the Captain stood over Celci as she juggled a dozen tasks in front of her trying to locate and manage the leak. A few minutes ago, the Captain had rushed in here as a response to a cryo leak, which was sure to spell trouble for the colonists if left to worsen. Breakfast still on the table, coffee still in hand.

“I don’t understand where the problem is,” Celci grumbled. “I’ve checked everything. The damn machine doesn’t see any problem!”

The Captain scanned over the machines, the pipes on the wall. They peered into the pod chamber. There was nothing that seemed out of place other than the bright red screen in front of them. But there had to be a problem, a leak somewhere. The air in the cryo room was cooling by the minute. Their breaths visible in the air, the walls turning icy. This was nowhere near the Captain’s expertise, so they had to rely on Celci to figure out what the problem was.

Celci went around the room again, flashlight in hand, “This is just… great, fantastic. Who let Mark build a ship? His stupid ship design always causes problems!”

 The Captain huffed.

Celci shook her head, “Gah! Where is that idiot anyway? I sent a message to him ten minutes ago! Oh, wait, I can guess,” She slammed a thick book down the desk next to the console. “He found out the hard way that glass windows and space don’t mix well.”

(Their gut hit the computer, hand outstretched as Mark slipped from their grasp. “Captain-!”)

The Captain tightened their grasp on their mug. The heat from the ceramic burned into their skin. They flexed their left hand, gritting their teeth against the burn. One of the other crew members hunched over the console and searched through systems again, even though it was pointless to do so. Celci had already made the rounds once, twice, ten times.

Cryogenics wasn’t very common yet. Not when most space stations weren’t too far from Earth, barely stretching out past Pluto at its farthest from the sun. The Captain never ventured much farther than Neptune's moons personally. They had some control over rockets beyond there, but this was the first time the Captain had left the Earth-Origin System.

With a grimace, the Captain flexed their hand. It was still burning.

 Wait…

The  burning in their palm was coming from their left hand, not the hand currently holding the coffee.

Curiously, the Captain lifted their other palm and stared. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary there, they thought as they flexed their fist. The Captain certainly wasn't a stranger to accidentally injuring themself - some of Mark's clumsiness must be contagious - but they'd remember something like that, right?

“Mark!” Celci shouted.

The Captain blinked back to attention. They turned on their heel to face the door to the hallway. Mark stood, straight as a board. One hand clenched around the steel doorframe, knuckles pale. His breaths came in shallow, ragged breaths. Eyes wide and blown out as if he had seen a ghost - or bedded one. His gaze stuck on one point, not moving even as Celci and the other crew moved about the room. Their hand; the one that was burning.

“Mark-?”

“Mark!” Celci rushed up to him, snatching his sleeve and yanked him inside the cryo room. He stumbled after, blinking rapidly as his gaze flickered about Celci. “We need help here. Something is happening to the cryo reactor and I don’t know what!”

“Cryo?” Mark murmured.

Celci dragged Mark to the console, jabbing at the screen to get the diagnostics up, “This damned thing isn’t showing what’s happening. I don’t know where the problem is. This is your ship!”

Mark swayed. His back was to the Captain.

“Mark!”

“Oh!” Mark nodded, stepping away from the console. “Yeah. Yeah, have… you checked the coolant pumps?”

Celci huffed, “I already did that. Captain told me to check that first, there’s nothing wrong with the coolant.”

Mark paused. His head twitched like he was about to look back at the Captain, but stopped midway and turned back to Celci, “Did… you check the connection between the cryo-reactor and the pumps?”

“Of course I- uh…” Celci blinked. Then she stood and peered behind the console. Then- “Shit!”

Well. The Captain sipped their coffee. I… guess that problem has been figured out.

But there's one more problem. Their gaze turned back to Mark, after Celci began digging behind the console. The Captain stepped forward, joining Mark’s side. Their shoulders brushed when the Captain patted his back. He went rigid under the touch, goosebumps running up and down his arms. His wide eyes flicked to them.

“Captain,” Mark’s voice was barely a whisper, shuddering under the weight of their stare. The Captain dropped their hand from his back, and he visibly relaxed.

“Mark,” The Captain signed. “What’s-?”

“Mark! Help me with this!”

“Right!” Mark rushed to where Celci was hunched over, providing his assistance.

With the both of them working on the problem, everything was fixed in a few minutes. The moment everything was in working order, Mark made his way to the door. The Captain called out for him, but the engineer slipped into the cluster of crew in the hallway before they could catch him. The problem now solved, crew filled in the spaces where there had once been icy cold, and readily worked hard at what they had missed while the coolant pump had been damaged.

The Captain didn’t have anything else here at the moment, so they turned back to Celci as she approached.

“Okay, Captain. The problem’s been fixed!” Celci put her hands on her hips and straightened her posture proudly. “It was weird that the computer couldn’t pick up the problem. Maybe it just needs to be recalibrated. I can get Mark to look at it later, but right now everything looks in good shape. I’ll fill out the incident report and send it your way by tonight.”

The Captain nodded, giving a thumbs up, and took a sip from their coffee.

Now to my breakfast…

“Hey, Captain?”

Dammit.

Celci’s gaze skated over theirs, before she said, “Is Mark okay? He seemed kinda… weird. Well, more weird than Mark usually is. He didn’t insult me nearly as much as he usually would when we were working on the coolant leak.”

The Captain shrugged, “I mean… maybe he’s just busy. Head Engineer and all. We are going down to the surface in a few weeks, so it’s not like he’s got nothing to worry about.”

“Right,” Celci frowned. She stared at the Captain for a few moments, before her attention was pulled elsewhere. Before she turned away, Celci told the Captain, “I’d keep an eye on him anyway. Don’t want him to break anything.”

“Ah, Captain!”

The voice forced the hairs on their neck to stand. The Captain rubbed the back of their neck, soothing the tense nerves there, and lifted their attention from the stack of papers sitting on the meeting room table.

“Mack.”

The said engineer greeted the Captain with a bright smile and took their hand when they offered it. Mack smelled like the cheap cologne that they all brought with them, along with the sharp odor of hair spray, and the Captain pulled away from the engineer as soon as they were able to. Contrary to Mark, Mack’s jumpsuit was smooth, tugging at his frame like freshly ironed laundry. His skin was clean, no trace of grime or dirt.

“It’s an honor to be in your presence. I enjoyed your speech when you arrived on the ship. You have a wonderful way with words,” Mack beamed, brighter than he frankly should at six o’clock in the morning. “I’m delighted you asked to meet with me.”

The Captain spared a smile back and drew back. “We have some things to discuss.”

“Whatever you have to say, you have my attention.”

Suck up, they thought. “Celci, Gunther, Burt, Mark, and I are all going to be heading down to the planet’s surface within the week to see the conditions ourselves. We’re going to be away for roughly two weeks. In the meantime, we need to have some people in charge on the ship to relay communications between us and the ship.”

Mack opened his mouth, but before he could-

“You are not in charge of the ship.”

Mack deflated.

The thought gave them shivers. Something told them to avoid Mack taking charge at all costs, but unfortunately Mack was one of the best engineers on the ship, save Mark. The Captain already had a few other crew members in mind to head the ship in their absence, hopefully who would be able to stand up to Mack if he decided to usurp the title and turn the colony into a dictatorship dedicated to worshipping him.

Not that would ever happen. That was ridiculous.

So the Captain told Mack that he’d be filling in the Head of Engineering while Mark was away, and would be reporting to whoever the Captain decided to fill in for themself in order to give a daily report to the crew. Celci would be choosing her own fill-in, as would Burt. Gunther… actually, on second thought, maybe the Captain should choose someone to fill in for Gunther.

Mack's disappointment was present throughout the conversation, but he didn’t show any sign of rebellion, so the Captain continued discussing the duties he would he picking up on.

After handing him a list, Mack exclaimed, “This is what Mark was doing every day!?”

The list unfolded in his hands, rolling and rolling until the paper hit the floor. The Captain bit the inside of their cheek at the engineer’s exasperated expression, full of genuine surprise at the responsibilities of someone that was often perceived as… incapable.

“Yes,” The Captain signed. “And what I do in a day is actually longer. But I wouldn’t give you these responsibilities if I didn’t think you could handle them. Most of them are diagnostics, so it’s not that difficult. Or at least, that’s what Mark tells me.”

Mack huffed and began reading over the list, mumbling. The only bits they managed to hear was “If Mark can, I can.”

While Mack reviewed over his future responsibilities, the Captain dug through the stack of papers of the ADS team to find a suitable temporary Gunther replacement.

“Hey, Captain, I- oh…”

The Captain turned around, raising their head from the paperwork on the table to face the doorway. Mark stood there, his jumpsuit covered in grime, his hair a mess. He held a toolbox in one hand, balancing two paper cups in his other hand. His gaze was firmly on Mack, his expression slowly falling to a frown.

There was a bout of silence between the three of them, before the Captain greeted him with a smile and a wave.

The tension slipped from his face, and he returned a bashful smile.

“Hi, Captain,” Mark’s voice softened. He dropped his toolbox on the cabinet beside the door and took one of the cups with his newly freed hand. “I got you coffee. Figured you’d want it before our busy day today.”

Mark wedged himself between them and Mack, handing over the cup of coffee, “Whatcha working on?”

“Ah, well-”

“Our good Captain here was just figuring out who was going to be in charge while you are on the surface,” Mack interrupted them. The Captain shot a glare in his direction, met with a pair of palms and a guilty expression. “Oops.”

“In charge-?” Mark echoed. He stumbled midsentence, then rounded on Mack, “You? In charge? That’s… ridiculous. I’m not comfortable having Mack run the ship.”

“He’s not,” the Captain patted him on the arm. Mark turned back to them, searching their expression for assurance. “We’re just discussing him taking over the maintenance in your absence. I’m figuring out who is going to be leading in my absence.”

“Oh,” Mark mumbled.

The Captain smiled, which was reciprocated by the Head Engineer.

“Wait,” He frowned. “Are you telling me that Mack is going to be Head of Engineering while we’re gone?”

“Yes,” the Captain confirmed.

Mark made a face like biting into a sour piece of candy, but he didn’t argue.

For the next ten minutes, the Captain reviewed every responsibility that Mack would have with Mark’s assistance. Starting from the top of the list to the very bottom. Mark almost looked smug at times, which the Captain would nudge him for, but never outright scolded him. It was almost funny watching Mack shift under the pressure of his upcoming responsibilities. And, even though they had already decided that he was getting no where near it, that was already enough for the Captain to dismiss him as a possible candidate for the temporary captain position.

It wasn’t long before Mark had to deal with a problem on the ship. He took his toolbox and left, bidding the Captain adieu. The Captain’s gaze lingered on the door.

“Is he alright?”

They blinked. Then shrugged.

“He's been like this all week,” The Captain smiled gently. “I think the work is stressing him out.”

“Has he always been like this?”

“Well… kinda,” the Captain shrugged. “He gets tense sometimes. He got like this when the work got heavy in college. We do have a lot to do now that we have a planet to take care of, you know? I’m sure you’ve been pretty busy.”

I guess it's better than being ignored. The Captain brushed it off, returning to the stack of papers, now going through crew members to find a suitable fill in for their position.

“Maybe he needs a break.”

“Maybe.”

The Captain sipped from their coffee in their right hand.

Their left was hot.

“Hi, Captain.”

Thump-!

Mark flinched. A flash of bright red taunted his peripherals, his throat tightening. When he looked up, it was only a crimson game controller waved near his face. Gunther had flopped onto the couch not too far away from him.

“Hey, Gunther,” the Captain signed.

Mark let out a shaky breath, then took the controller from the Captain and settled down in the cushions he’d dragged down from the love seat. He sat on the floor, while Celci sat on the couch above him. The Captain sat on the floor to his left, Gunther on the couch to their left, and Burt sunk in between the two on the couch.

“Mark, pick a character already!” Celci groaned, nudging Mark’s back with her knee.

“Okay! Okay,” Mark huffed, scrolling down the list to find the character he always played. The sprite made a happy chirp. The Captain pressed through the menus, and ensured everyone was ready, before sitting the start button.

The game started.

“Son of a-!” Gunther crashed face first into the wall as soon as the game started. Burt sped ahead of him, catching second place.

The Captain gasped when a shell narrowly avoided their hit box, clipping a pixel of their kart. They maintained the number one position.

Mark was in last place, just behind Celci as she weaved in and out of the obstacles and just barely missed a falling boulder. Said boulder smashed Mark into the floor. He swore out loud, Celci snorting at his misery. Celci's knee pressed into his shoulder blade, and when she shifted in frustration, her kneecap dug in painfully. Mark winced, but he didn’t say anything.

“Mark!” Celci cried when his character slammed into hers, her character spinning as Mark sped ahead. Mark cackled, an almost evil gleam in his gaze.

“In your face!” Mark said.

Celci huffed with a scowl, determined to catch up with Mark now that she was in last place.

The Captain remained cruising through first place, no competition in sight as the other four fought over their places on the board. They only smirked as they watched the screen, taking in their victory. It almost like the game favored them, because they crossed the finish line before anyone else did, way ahead than what seemed physically possible. They put down their controller and leaned back, smiling smugly. The other four were far behind.

“I’m so done,” Gunther exclaimed. “There’s no chance.”

“Don’t be a sore loser, Gunther!” Mark laughed. “At least you’re not in last place!”

Celci jabbed Mark in the spine, and he let out a grunt, his thumb slipping off the joystick. His character crashed into a wall, and Celci’s character zipped by.

“No fair!” Gunther exclaimed when a shell hit his cart, and Celci zoomed past him.

Celci laughed, “All is fair in love and war!”

Burt crossed the finish line and put down his controller and waited silently. The Captain cheered for him and held out a hand to give him a high five. Burt stared at the hand for a long moment before he relented and gave the Captain a high five. The Captain beamed, and happily shimmied deeper into their cushion and turned their gaze back to the screen as Gunther, Mark, and Celci exchanged last place amongst each other.

“Mark!” Gunther exclaimed, as a stray projectile from Mark’s character smashed into Gunther’s, and Celci and Mark sped ahead of him with wild laughter. Gunther gave an indignant huff, “Ah! C’mon!”

Celci and Mark gave each other a high five, as the two of them worked together to keep Gunther in last place.

The Captain and Burt gave their silent bets to each other. The two bet on Mark eating his words, and the Captain thought that Mark would get beaten by Gunther, and Burt thought he would get betrayed by Celci.

Mark threw a shell behind him as Gunther got closer, and Gunther’s character spun out. He let out a loud swear, “Mark!”

Celci patted Mark’s crown, “Nice one!”

The Captain snorted and turned to Burt and signed, “The only time they work together.”

Burt didn’t respond, just gave a breath out his nose that sounded like it could be a laugh, then looked back to the screen. The room was full of taunts and laughter, a bunch of shoving and attempting to yank controllers just to gain a bit of an advantage. Gunther reached over to try and kick Mark, but the engineer rolled to the side just in time to avoid a kick and conveniently dodged a projectile on the screen.

“Gunther!” Mark shouted indignantly. Gunther only laughed, his eyes lit up, his eyes flashing damn near red as he charged through the fourth-place spot, knocking Mark down into last place. Celci squeals as the projectile that missed Mark hit her, forcing her character to spin out. Gunther cackled, only to cry out when his character fell off the map.

“Dammit!” He swore.

Burt and the Captain watched all the while, the Captain with a sly grin on their face, enjoying the chaos that reigned.

“Sadist,” Mark grumbled.

The Captain only gave him a cheeky glance.

The rest of the round was a chorus of laughter, yelling, and attempts at sabotage. Celci slipped into third place at the finish line, and Gunther had to quickly recover from falling off the map a couple of times.

Mark was in last place, crying out every time he hit an obstacle – “My controller drifted!” “Sure, Mark.”

And, when everyone crossed the finish line, the Captain grinned and patted Mark on the shoulder, “Better luck next time.”

Mark pouted, “You’re a cruel leader. I’m staging a rebellion.”

After their first game, the five of them played a few more games. Usually, the Captain was in first place and Mark was in last. Burt, Celci, and Gunther would compete for the other three places, but Burt usually claimed second while Celci and Gunther were fighting for third. Mark would have made a joke about how unfair it was that they had to compete against the captain of their ship, that they had an unfair advantage in comparison to the rest of them, if only he could get his mouth to move after the fifth round.

He glanced over at the Captain-

Their angry face filled his vision. Their screams, their broken screams… He couldn’t take it, but he had to. He couldn’t take it, but he had to, because they were pinning him down and he couldn’t move.

Why couldn’t he move?

His shoulders felt glued to the metal floor, flashes of blue and grey and red spreading through his vision. He think he felt his nose crack.

He’d come after them. He was scared, he saw that look on their face. The way their hands grasped and fumbled for something and he was the closest thing to grab. But at the same time, they had looked like they wanted to scream, to push him off the balcony, and as tightly they grasped him, they tried just as hard to fight him. They fought him, they held him, they were lost in whatever damned flashback they had from the many, many years of torment he caused them. His chest ached - from more than their punches. He felt like the worst type of person. What kind of person did this to their friend?

He ached, and he comforted them, because what else could he have done?

They were screaming, tears rolling down their flushed cheeks-

And Mark gasped as another punch struck his face.

He’d come after them, and all those years of frustration and pain came boiling over in a bloody mess. And… he let them. He couldn’t justify pushing them off, no matter how much pain he felt. His pain in that moment was nothing compared to the hundreds of years the Captain spent going through the warps, the different realities of him and them and their antics.

He’d restarted everything once again, once again to try and make everything better. He deserved to remember, the Captain didn’t. He’d messed everything up, and all he wanted was to make up for what he had done. He’d made sure this time, but-

He had to make this right-

“Mark?”

Mark jolted, the controller dropping from his grasp as he choked on his own breath. His eyes scanned over the room, trying to remember where the hell he was.

Right, he was in the lounge. He had been playing a game with the Captain, and the crew.

“Um…” Mark swallowed, squeezing his fists to try to ease his anxiety. He looked around again, and he found the Captain giving him a concerned look. “Captain?”

“You were spacing out.”

“Oh…” Mark rubbed his clammy hands on his pants. “Sorry, I… got a little distracted.”

The Captain’s head tilted, brows furrowing slightly. Their mouth opened, shut, as if in some debate with themself. But, ultimately, they didn’t do anything. They settled into the cushion and turned back to the rest of the crew and joined the discussion on what duties they all were taking on the moment they came down to the surface of this planet. Before long, Celci and the Captain were the main ones conversing, discussing the condition of the colonists and how they were to maintain their condition while the five of them were gone. Apparently, Celci had already chosen her temporary replacement.

While those two conversed, Mark flinched at the sudden nudge against his side. He whipped his head around, finding Gunther on the floor next to him. When did he get there?

“Dude, seriously,” Gunther began. He tilted a flask at him – one that you would think would be filled with alcohol, but rather, it was filled with water. “What the hell has been going on with you? Cryo freeze your brain or something?”

Dammit. Mark shook his head, taking a deep breath to try and ease his nerves. “Nothing has been going on. The ship has just been running me ragged. I think I need a long nap.”

“Oh, yeah. I heard from the other crew members that some of the systems looked like they had been tampered with,” Gunther said, sipping on his flask. “Celci suggested that was why the coolant leak in cryo happened. Not to mention, I had to recalibrate everything in the Asteroid Defense System that day we all woke up. I swear. Had I waited another day, those turrets would have turned on us.”

Mark choked. No. He fixed everything. Everything was fine-

Mark woke up with a start.

Alarms blaring, flashes of red, red, red.

Mark’s head ached, but he pushed through on shaking, buckling legs as he scrambled through the cold, grey corridors. These walls used to be his greatest passion, his life’s work, the very thing he entrusted to his best friend.

He'd promised them this.

And now it was all falling apart.

Thump, thump, thump-

His footsteps on the metal floor almost as loud as his heartbeat as he scrambled towards the broken systems. His hands curled around the handles in oxygen, and fumbled with the handprint scanner at ADS.

The first time, he’d gotten shot.

Good thing this wasn’t his first time.

But he slipped up. Waited a second too long before charging in, and now he was on the floor, heaving for breath as a crimson stained the metal floor.

Oh gods, would the Captain see him like this?

Oh gods, oh no, no, no-

He could hardly feel the pain anymore. He could hear the door opening again, and the wail he heard made him wish for a quicker death-

“Mark!”

The man jolted, his hands reaching up and clasping at bullet wounds. Captain? Captain, oh no-

“I’m sorry!” He rasped out.

A hand on his shoulder yanked him back to the real world. No bullet wounds, no blood. No Captain-

No Captain?

Mark’s head whipped around. “Where- Where’s the Captain-?”

Gunther’s hands squeezed his shoulders, “Them and Celci went out to check on the rest of the crew.”

The Captain is okay.

He took a sigh of relief at that thought. He ignored the cold warmth in his chest, the phantom of blood and bullets. He nodded quietly, just turning towards the door which was cracked open. There was some chatter down the hall from another crew, likely routine maintenance.

Everything is fine.

“Dude… seriously. Are you okay?” Gunther’s voice broke through his internal dialogue. “You’ve been on edge all week, man.”

Tell him. It’s Gunther of all people. He would never be as critical about Mark’s ramblings as Celci was. He needed to get this off his back. Things were going so badly for him, and he knew he only had himself to blame, but… the ship needed him. How could he do his job if he wasn’t on top of his game?

“Yeah, actually,” Mark began. “There… have been somethings going on lately…”

Gunther looked at Mark, scanning over Mark’s condition. His brows furrowed slightly. Mark didn’t think he looked well. He hadn’t had the energy to take a shower, only able to wipe off the dirt and grime from his job with a washcloth. He was hardly able to sleep. He must look like a walking corpse. Gunther looked at Mark with an uncharacteristically serious look, then said, “Lay it on me, man. What’s going on with you?”

Mark leaned back against the couch, pursing his lips. His head felt like it was spinning. All he could think about was all his mistakes, everything he had done wrong in the past few years. It felt like nothing he did was good enough.

How could he call himself the Head Engineer when he messed up everything he touched?

“I’ve… been having a lot of nightmares lately,” Mark admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “I… I’ve made a few mistakes, and… I just… can’t stop thinking of how much I keep messing things up.”

Gunther sat, uncharacteristically quiet, as he listened intently to Mark’s words.

“I’ve done… things that no one should be okay with,” Mark swallowed. “I… let myself be fooled by my own hero complex.”

“… is this about the Captain’s accident?” Gunther asked, his voice calm. “You know that wasn’t your fault, right?”

Mark wanted so badly to protest. That’s what everyone said, but he had been the one behind the controls. “I just-”

“Guys!”

Gunther and Mark spun towards the door, where they found the Captain and Celci clinging to the doorway, vibrating with excitement. Celci’s smile matched the Captain’s, as they looked to each other with glee, then back at Mark and Gunther. He could see crew rushing around behind them, some shouting. The Captain nudged Celci, who rolled her eyes with a “okay, okay”.

“They’ve got everything set up! It’s time!” Celci beamed, and the Captain gestured for the Gunther and Mark to follow. Celci flickered her gaze between the two men, “Listen. We’re getting ready to go down. We’re having a meeting on the bridge before the five of us go down, but we’ve got thirty minutes until it’s time. Get your asses over!”

And, just like that, Celci and the Captain were excitedly running off.

Gunther laughed and rose to his feet, grasping Mark’s arm to drag him up too, “You hear that!? It’s time to blast shit apart!”

“Meeting at the bridge!”

The Captain rushed into the room with Mark by their side, the engineer handing them a champagne glass full of what was definitely not alcohol, as the crew stood before them, eyes wide and full of excitement for the upcoming expedition. It was all too familiar to how all of this went down before they first entered cryo.

The Captain raised a toast with a smile that conveyed all the love and joy they had for their crew.

None of this would have been possible without you.

As before, a moment later, everyone scattered.

When the Captain went to the computer to do one final check over the status of the ship – an impulse they’ve been having lately, too paranoid over the ship’s systems – a certain engineer jumped in front of them, stopping them.

“Nice speech, Captain!” Mack said. “So, I’ll be running the ship in your absence-”

A hand clasped over his mouth before he could finish his sentence. Their blood ran cold at the mere thought of Mack running the ship in their absence. The Captain gave a firm shake of their head, No, no, don’t you even dare-

Then, they pointed to First Mate.

Mack gaped, but he didn’t have time to protest before the Captain was being swept away by their last minute duties. Five minutes. Five minutes to make all of this happen. All the systems were online, all the power was stable. Colonists? Stable. Crew? Also stable. Everything was in tip top shape, and not a thing was out of place.

When Mark nudged them, they knew it was time to go.

Mark and the Captain walked towards the loading docks side by side. Crew rushed around frantically, making all last-minute preparations.

“Captain, catch me-!”

Immediately, the Captain froze to the spot, stiffening as their crew member flew at their position. Or, rather, the position they would have been in had they not stopped. The Captain didn't flinch as their crew member collapsed to the ground with all the theatrics, cat yowl included. (When did we bring a cat?) Sexy Crew leapt to their feet as they turned, smiling awkwardly as he scratched at his scalp. "Ah, my mistake! How terrible of me! I'll clean this right away, Captain!"

I’m just a captain.

Why do people throw themselves at me?

Mark cleared his throat, peeling their attention from Sexy Crew, and guided the Captain to the docking bay where they started this whole journey. Both of them glanced around, watching the workers prepare the smaller vessels for descent on to the planet. The handful of crew members heading down were double checking the supplies, making sure they had all they needed to begin work on the surface.

This is it. After a long journey, they were finally about to land on their new home.

Mark’s hand found their shoulder, "Now, Captain, the colony needs us. Are you ready?"

The Captain gave a thumbs up and flashed a smile.

As I'll ever be.