Chapter Text
Bucky is not a man who complains. It’s just not his style. But man, these past few missions have really tested his patience.
“It’s like, sure, I’m up for another mission, but do I really need to be moist all the time?” Bucky grumbles to himself, which translates to a flutter of bubbles from his scuba diving mask.
“Wha's that?”
You swim closer to him, your cerulean mermaid tail majestically waving through the water. No, the tail isn't necessary for the mission; Bucky had asked beforehand. But you had always wanted to try it out. So now he’s on a mission with Barbie from Barbie: A Mermaid Tale. All that’s missing is a friendly seahorse.
Then, he spots you trying to touch a jellyfish. He tries to warn you, but it’s too late.
You yelp, pull back your hand, and let out a bubble of curses.
Bucky sighs. Every time.
---
The glitching in his arm is going to drive him insane. Back from the mission for only 24 hours, and he has already crushed his phone, snapped a fork, and almost strangled Clint, who tried to jumpscare him.
Bucky had apologized, to which Clint only laughed, saying, “You’d be surprised to know what I’m into.”
And so Bucky had been considering removing his vibranium hand altogether. And he would have done it if he hadn’t had the bright idea to ask Jarvis what to do.
---
“Ow, ow, ow.” You make your way through the hallway with stiff legs. The mermaid tail made even the muscles you didn’t know you had hurt. Stupid tail. Though you suppose at least now it could be a tax write-off instead of an impulse buy at three a.m. after one too many glasses of wine.
“Yo, kid,” Tony yells as soon as he spots you. “Tell the Buckinator I’m adding the hot tub of rice to his rent this month.”
“His what?”
“His hot tub of rice. You know.”
You blink at Tony, trying to process his words. “Is that even a thing?”
“It is now. The guy was too stubborn to ask for help until his arm was practically malfunctioning. Jarvis suggested the rice trick, so now Bucky’s got his whole metal arm soaking in it. Claims it’s therapeutic.”
“That’s... well, inventive, I suppose.”
Tony claps you on the shoulder. “That’s the spirit! Now go tell him the news. And maybe get some rice for dinner while you’re at it.”
---
You find Bucky in the makeshift repair lab, his metal arm submerged up to the elbow in what looks like a mini jacuzzi filled with rice. He looks up as you enter, raising an eyebrow.
“I’m supposed to tell you that Tony’s charging you for the ‘hot tub of rice’,” you say.
Bucky lets out a deep sigh. “Of course he is. Because why not?”
You come closer and scoop some rice into the kettle you brought along from the kitchen. “How’s the rice bath working out for you?”
Bucky waggles his fingers, sending a cascade of rice grains tumbling back into the tub. “Surprisingly well. Feels weird, but the glitches are less frequent. I’m just hoping I don’t end up with a rice plant growing out of my shoulder.”
Just then, Clint pokes his head into the lab. “Hey Bucky, need some soy sauce on that grain?”
Bucky picks up a handful of rice and chucks it at Clint. “No thanks to you, birdbrain.”
Clint dodges the rice, laughing. “Some soy sauce, you, and seaweed, and we could have sushi for dinner.”
You moan, “God, yes. I’m craving some raw fish tonight.”
Bucky chuckles, waving you off. “Yeah, yeah. Thanks for the heads up. Now get out of here.”
As you walk away, you can’t help but think that despite the obvious lack of common sense, there’s a chance that this may work. You pause and turn back, grinning. “Bucky, I guess you’re riding the wave of innovation, one grain of rice at a time.”
Bucky groans. “Really? Did you have to?”
You wink. “Shore.”