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Emi had never been a pretty girl, her peers made sure she knew it. She was a bit taller than average, with broad shoulders and a thick waist. Since 14 she had been bulky muscle, and before that, as a kid, she was chubby. Her face had always been round and littered with freckles. Even now, she still sported acne scars from when she couldn’t stop picking at her skin as a teen. And at the ripe age of 21 her smile lines had already started to set in. Emi was never pretty, but she was always funny.
Funny got Emi friends and some form of fickle acceptance among her peers. A good enough joke had saved her from bullies and conflict many times. Funny was great protection.
Funny, however, didn’t work on boys, at least not romantically. Emi had plenty of male friends, but they were never anything more than that. With them, mere suggestion that they were dating Emi would be met with disgust and laughter.
Guys wanted pretty, and she didn’t have that; Emi had big, and loud, and brash, and funny. Emi had accepted the conflict of interests quickly; after all, she was going to be a hero, she didn’t need a boyfriend.
That wasn’t to say it didn’t hurt, back in high school, seeing her friends pair up so easily. Emi had tried her luck at asking people out a few times, and every time it ended in them brushing it off like another one of her jokes, if not laughing in her face for believing she had a chance with them. One particularly mean boy had told everyone, making her the laughingstock of the school. After that, Emi was careful to stay the joke teller and not the joke.
…….
“Where do you get that wit of yours?” An older hero asked Emi through laughter.
“I'd tell you, but that would ruin the magic” Emi retorted with a wink. She, and a group of other heroes had just closed a months-long case, and were celebrating at the small bar that was a central point between all of their agencies.
The celebration was nearing its end, and Emi had ducked out of the bar for some fresh air; between the stuffy air and the alcohol, she was starting to get a headache. She was headed back to the gathering, when she heard someone call “Fukukado” from a few meters away. “Miss Joke” he corrected as she turned around to look at him. Standing there was the hero Eraserhead, they had worked closely on this case, though Emi thought he was back at his agency, filing paperwork instead of joining the rest of them. She hadn't seen him all night.
“That's my name- don't wear it out!” She said with a smile.
Eraserhead shifted his weight from his left leg to his right. In her slight inebriation, Emi didn’t pick up on the slight nervousness he held. “I was wondering if you would, possibly, be interested in getting coffee, or dinner, or- anything you want”
Was he drunk?
Emi laughed, out of instinct. Laughter was always her first response to nervousness or fear or vulnerability. “Like a date?” There was no way handsome, smart , logical, Eraserhead would actually, seriously, ask her out, Emi thought. But he simply nodded a yes to her question. “With me? Why?” She blurted through more nervous laughter.
Eraserhead looked slightly taken aback at the question “I enjoyed working with you the past few months” he said, very straightforward. “You’re smart, a great hero- and very pretty” he said with a small smile.
That statement felt like a punch to the gut, she wanted to believe him, but the way people always regarded her led her to believe that he had to be joking. He tried to catch her eye, but Emi avoided his gaze, instead breaking into loud, showy, fake laughter. “That's a good one Eraser!” Emi said, folding over herself in laughter. She wouldn't let her guard down, not this time.“I didn't think you had it in you!”
At some point in her deflecting laughter, Eraserhead slipped back from where he had appeared, Emi didn't see his dejected posture.
The headache came back to Emi ten fold once he had left. She was first hit with the pounding headache, and then with swift, sick, regret and embarrassment. Emi spent her next half an hour at the bar, head hung low in blurred thought. What was she thinking? - or rather not thinking. She felt like an asshole for laughing in Eraserhead’s face, even if she did it out of reflex and protection. She was in no state to call him, did she even have his number? What would she say? Her headache and mild state of intoxication prevented Emi from forming any coherent thoughts on the matter. -What a royal fuck up.
Emi wanted to apologize the next chance she got, she really did, but that was easier said than done. Emi’s opportunities to see the elusive Eraserhead were few and far between, seeing him usually in big groups. The few times when Emi had the chance to talk to him, she got so overwhelmed by nerves and embarrassment that she ended up just firing off lighthearted jokes; the words for an apology always getting choked and lost- humor was infinitely easier than sincerity.This charade lasted 3 years. Although Emi didn't intend for it to last so long, the time away was good; it allowed Emi to grow, it allowed her to gain more confidence, both in herself and her words, now she could properly talk to him.
…….
Miss Joke, and many other heroes were invited to a full day work conference. During the hour break in the middle of the conference; Emi was able to finally talk to the guy she had spent the entire day trying to get a hold of. “Eraserhead” she called, grabbing his attention and joining him in the secluded corner of the nearly empty room he was in. Emi drew in a deep breath “ For a long time now, I’ve wanted to say that I’m sorry-“
His expression barely changed, yet confusion was all over his face; “For what?”
“A few years ago when you asked me out… and… l laughed at you-” Emi winced at how harsh that sounded.
“Oh” he said, the confusion on his face being replaced with something Emi couldn’t quite decipher “No need to apologize, you weren't interested in me- it’s okay”
“No no” (She was interested in him - but that was beside the point) “laughing in your face was a really shitty move”
“You were 21, drunk, and I probably caught you off guard- it's fine, really.” Eraser assured.
Despite Shouta’s interruptions, Emi was determined to properly apologize not just to be absolved of her guilt, but because he deserved it. “no- I shouldn’t have laughed, it was the wrong response, back then, I couldn’t fathom that anyone would want to date me, I thought you were making fun of me.” Emi sighed “I thought you were going to laugh at me; so I laughed first. I’m sorry.”
“Thank you.” He accepted. They were enveloped in a comfortable silence, processing each others’ words, before he asked “Why did you think that nobody would date you?”
Emi laughed, a soft, genuine laugh, “I hate to break it to you Aizawa, but I'm not exactly a pretty girl.”
He gave her this absolutely incredulous look that betrayed his usual stoicism “Fukukado, you’re beautiful- objectively” He stated like absolute, indisputable, fact.
Emi was almost surprised with how serious he was “thank you” she said, hoping her face didn’t look as flush as it felt.
“Not a compliment- it’s a statement of fact” Emi knew how to pick her battles and decided to just accept his ‘statement’.
For the rest of their break they talked like they used to; like when they were assigned together on that case years ago. Banter flowed easily between them; funny how easily conversation flowed when Emi wasn’t held back by shame and peoples’ opinions of her.
The end to Emi and Shouta’s time together was drawing to a close, and she still had one more thing to say, or rather ask him. She was suddenly filled with a familiar nervousness at the thought of asking, but she fought through the urge to end their interaction with a joke. “I'm a couple years late, but would you still be interested in that date?” Emi asked with a smile, glancing up at him.
Shouta looked down, holding her gaze, “Would you laugh if I said yes?”