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“Ash?”
The gentle, melodic voice of Serena passed through the air. He looked up from where he stared at his knees, atop the wet, dewy grassy hill at Lumiose Park. He fixed his blue jacket on better. The honey blonde girl smiled sweetly, holding her hat on her head as she jogged up to her. Her hair bristled in the wind, while the moon lit her face up. Ash waved.
“I wanted to talk to you.” She explained, plopping down beside him. Her face had a soft rosiness to it with each word she said. He had gone out to be alone, though, so, he couldn’t help feeling slightly resentful at the fact she ignored the request for him to be alone.
Again.
He shook it off. “Hey Serena. I thought I said I told you I wanted to be alone for a bit.”
He was still struggling to process everything that had just happened. He needed the time, didn’t she understand that? How could she still be so happy, and unafraid. He knew he looked like he wasn’t, but, no man could be strapped to the top of a tower and tortured and come out the same.
“I know…” She drawled the word, leaning back. Her expression changed in a subtle way he only noticed having his eyes trained on her face. “But I wanted to tell you something.”
Ash was silent, but gestured for Serena to spoke. She gripped her hands tight, breath caught up in her throat while each second passed like each gust of wind. It was a quiet night, with no cards or construction workers.
Just him, Serena, and the world. The blades of grass, the trees shading them, the moonlight, the clouds above, the stars hidden away. The everything about Lumiose. And as the silence pulsed and punctuated her last sentence, she stood up.
“I…” She began, before growing a little more determined. Ash rose to his feet too, facing Serena, who grabbed his wrists. His mind raced a mile a minute, while she said the next words.
“I love you.”
A pit dropped in his stomach. The smile on his face vanished, and he did the only thing he could think of doing.
Run.
He ran through empty streets, empty roads to nowhere. Empty places, empty cars. His footsteps clattered loudly on the pavement as he ran to try find something, someone, somewhere. His shoulder felt absent without Pikachu there. He skidded down an alleyway, sliding against the wall. His breath sped up as he struggled through the whirlwind of emotions.
His hands pressed against the cold, gritty concrete, and his heart pounded in his ear like a steady drum.
Why did he run? Why was he afraid. He knew he didn’t love her back. But what kind of person gets confessed to and bolts from the situation like a terrified Pokemon. Was he that afraid to make Serena upset?
He probably made her more upset by doing that.
“Ash? Ash, where are you?” Serena’s voice echoed across the walls and empty streets. She sounded concerned, more than anything. She was looking for him.
Why was he scared? He knew he didn’t want to be with Serena- she didn’t even know who he was any more. She loved some random kid, who looked older now. He knew that. She didn’t. He could just explain it, but he knew the words would catch in his throat and he’d stand there, staring at her, before changing the topic and throwing it all away.
Serena’s calls grew in frequency. “Ash, it’s okay, I’ll try to explain it all to you, or, you know, it might work out!”
Ash wanted to cry. Cry, alone in the dingy alleyway in Lumiose City, covered in cement dust and shame. Another voice joined Serena’s, and while Ash felt even more horrible for eavesdropping, he simply had to.
Despite all the stabbing shame.
The other voice was Steven’s. “What’s wrong? Ash is missing?”
“Yeah. I was-” Serena paused. She didn’t seem to want to say, but, after a few seconds, relented. Ash felt even worse. “I had confessed to Ash I liked him, and he just ran. I’m worried.”
Steven didn’t reply immediately, before Ash heard him sigh. “Serena, you saw him outside, right?”
“Yeah.” Serena replied quickly. It was, with morbid curiosity, Ash listened to a conversation about him. It was so interesting. Steven clicked his tongue against his teeth. “Didn’t he say he wanted to be left alone?”
Serena was silent.
“Look, Serena, Ash is dealing with a lot right now. You shouldn’t have said your feelings now. I understand you wanted to.. Say it, get it off your chest, but this wasn’t the time.”
“But why? Ash always bounces back?” Serena muttered, wringing her hands over her lap. “I thought he’d be okay.”
Steven made an odd noise akin to a Glameow getting annoyed. “Serena, do you know who Ash is?”
“What kind of question is that? Of course I do.”
“He treasures friendships. I do too, don’t we all?” Steven continued. “Alain betrayed him. That’s what he told us.”
“But he hurt us-” Serena began. Steven immediately cut her off, a stressful tone leaking into his tone. Why was he defending Ash? Wasn’t he in the wrong for running? Serena was right. Surely.
“Serena. You don’t get it, do you? I felt betrayed by Alain because he broke my trust over something I cared about. It’s the same for Ash. He’s just not said anything because he knows Alain needs to heal.” Steven explained, with slowly deteriorating patience. “I’ll go find him, but I’ll save you the answer for your question.”
“The-”
“He doesn’t like you. He doesn’t even feel romantic attraction.” Steven replied. Serena didn’t reply, but the sharp sniffle followed by footsteps told Ash she was gone.
Crying.
Was that his fault, too?
He slowly stood up, peeking around the alleyway. Steven was sat down at the bench, not even bothering to search for him. Curiosity overwhelmed him, and he wandered towards Steven, unsuredly. The dust on his palms felt odd.
He sat down beside Steven.
“Is it-”
“No.”
That was quick. Ash tried to continue. “How do you-”
“I keep in contact with the other Champions.”
That made sense in Ash’s head. Steven was already aware of what to do, and had been fine with trusting Ash’s plan back when he was trying to fight the Giant Rock. He had stayed as calm as he could, and looked through it with the same optimistic outlook, just in a slightly more mature angle. Ash sighed. “I feel bad. I was listening in on the conversation, I just ran off, I don’t understand why-”
“That’s okay.”
Simple. Steven fished through his pockets, and placed a little piece of raw, black tourmaline in his hand. It was geometric, and reflected the moonlight rather prettily. And, it was simple.
“Black tourmaline is supposed to protect you. It’s boron compounded with other elements.” Steven began, before explaining the formation of tourmalines to Ash.
He didn’t understand it, but the words distracted him from the holes in his chest, and the stinging in his eyes. He eventually drifted off, losing sight of why he had been there in the first place.
He forgot about Serena, instead, letting himself listen to a man explain the scientific properties of types of stones to him. Not that he understood a single word, but he was still interested. It was something to listen to. Something to appreciate, like the stone he idly gazed at under the moonlight.
The feelings of doubt, cast with a shade of shame, slowly became an appreciation for his friends.
“Satoshi, are you falling asleep? Surely I’m not that boring.” Steven teased lightly. His actual, Kantonian name, and not the nickname he had come up with for travelling while in places like Unova or Kalos, felt natural on the Hoenn Champion’s lips. It was his name. It was who he was. He blinked himself awake, while the laughter from Steven grew a little louder.
“It’s late, come on. I’ll let you sleep on the couch of my hotel room.” Steven offered. Ash sleepily nodded along.
He slept sounder than he had any other night after the Crisis.