Work Text:
[ pov ; 3rd person ]
“I,” Min forces out. “I’ve never done this before.”
Akin backs away and smiles at him, ever the conscientious lover Min supposes.
“That’s okay,” Akin reassures him. “It’s not that different from sex between men and women.” [woah..]
Min flushes and keeps his mouth shut. He’s so hard and just the brush of someone else is enough to make him desperate. He’d rush it if he were ‘in charge,’ so it’s good that Akin is slow and careful.
He doesn’t know what to do with his hands.
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He kisses Akin’s mouth and his neck, every once in a while his cheek or his ear. That seems simple enough, but his hands keep sliding up and down Akin’s back trying to avoid scars carefully.
Sometimes he wants to dig his fingernails in and just hold on, but he’s afraid of hurting Akin. That thought makes Min laugh at himself, at least he thinks it’s himself. Afraid of hurting Akin!
Finally, he just pulls his hands away and lets them shudder out in spasms just above Akin’s skin.
He’s worried about not lasting very long, but then he thinks about all the things that are off about his body and he thinks maybe he’ll last too long.
He internally chastises himself for being so morbid, but then ends up thinking strange things about his favorite musicals randomly [real] all while Akin slides his pants off past his ankles.
He has a fleeting moment where he thinks Akin might be psychic, but then he’s just impressed that his mind wandered so far and his dick stayed hard through it all. [ew..]
"Good job, little guy," he thinks. "Keep up the good work!" [😭]
Even with lubricant his automatic response when Akin tries to finger him is to seize up. Akin rubs his arm with his soft, bandaged hand.
“You’ve got to relax,” he says, and then Akin kisses him. Soon, Min doesn’t even notice it, because he gets so entranced by the mechanics and wonders of kissing another person. Sensations ghost across his lips and through his mouth for long, long moments after Akin pulls away.
Now Akin is fingering him. There's at least two fingers of his hand up… well, thinking about it is kind of unromantic. It’s not unpleasant really, so long as he breathes and keeps breathing.
It’s not painful and even if it was, Min has a very high pain tolerance. It’s not even very physically taxing! Still, this is all just weird. It's not the lightning bolts he thought it was supposed to be. He kind of hopes it doesn’t go on too long.
It doesn’t, and watching Akin — the way his cheeks flush, the way his breath hitches, the way he compulsively licks his lips — is wonderful.
It isn’t fireworks and lightning bolts. He still doesn’t know what to do with his hands, which just rest as lightly as he can make them on Akin’s shoulders, but it’s intimate.
He’s never felt so physically close to another person, not even when he was knee and elbow-deep in their entrails!
He’s glad that person is Akin. He looks into those dilated brown eyes, the slack little curve of his mouth, and he feels love. Not just hero-worship, not just lust, not just gratitude, but a real and rooted affection.
The one thing he’d hoped would be there, but everyone said wouldn’t. He feels a tiny bit vindictive and victorious, but he also realizes that his interest is waning… physically.
When Akin orgasms he gasps and squints his eyes very tightly. Min watches. It’s sort of cute and innocent. He thought there’d be more warning or that he’d feel it, y’know, inside himself, but he didn’t, he doesn’t. Akin only takes a moment to catch his breath.
“You’re quiet,” he says.
“I can’t think of anything to say,” Min admits.
“You didn’t orgasm,” Akin says.
“Yes, I did,” Min says, without even knowing why he would make up such a stupid lie. Akin just looks at him with this face, like he’s making fun of him, but in a nice way, or something.
Akin pulls away carefully and kisses him. He kisses Min in just the way he knows will make Min almost whimper.
"Not fair! It’s like taking a gun to a fistfight!" he thinks. His leg shakes and he curls his toes. [why did I write that? wtf]
Min has to pull his hands away entirely to keep from hurting Akin. He grabs at the bedsheets instead.
“I’ll make it up to you,” Akin offers. Min assumes that means ‘in the future’, but then Akin is kissing his way, open-mouthed, down Min’s chest. When he licks [woah..] the head of Min’s dick, Min nearly shoots out of his skin.
"Out of body experience," Min’s brain supplies.
“Oh God,” he gasps. Akin chuckles and the vibrations go right through him rapidly, like lightning.