Work Text:
The way that Umemiya just... knows everything about everyone everywhere all the time before they even know that he knows it has always been very mysterious -- and also very annoying -- to Hiragi.
And so when Hiragi finds himself in the rare position of being the knower and Umemiya being the unsuspecting un-knower, he makes damn sure to savor the moment and milk every drop of fun out of it that he can.
"So, Umemiya," he calls out casually. So casual, with his head propped against his fist and one leg slung over the other. "When are you going to tell everyone that you and Tsubakino are dating?"
It's very funny how Umemiya almost falls out of the hammock in shock, sending the manga he was reading flying halfway across the rooftop.
"Huh? What? Haha, Hiragi, what are you talking about, hahaha?" The way that Umemiya is so flustered and so bad at playing dumb is also very, very funny, and Hiragi makes sure to make his smirk extra wide and extra toothy.
"Did you hear someone say that? Wow, man, I wonder who could be talking about us like that?" Umemiya laughs, rubbing the back of his neck. "It couldn't have been Kotoha-chan... no way, Kotoha-chan would never betray me like that! Maybe Tsubaki-chan mentioned something by accident? Which is totally fine, I just wanted to make sure that I didn't say anything before they were ready, but I hope they aren't embarrassed about it and that people aren't gossiping about it or --"
"Umemiya!" Hiragi decides it's best to intervene before Bofurin loses their leader to an anxiety attack. "Nobody said anything. I just had a hunch because I saw that you and Tsubakino are wearing matching nail polish. But congratulations, man, I think you two are great for each other."
Umemiya gasps and immediately fans his hands out, displaying his ten fingers painted in Tsubaki's signature fire engine red. Looking back up at Hiragi, he beams in silent thanks, and Hiragi responds with a soft, genuine smile of his own.
"Also, you have their lipstick stains all over your collar."