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"Your first kiss was Kohane? Are you serious???"
Was it truly the start of a productive practice if the infamously loud and, in Akito's frank opinion, obnoxious An Shiraishi wasn't screaming her head off? Some may have differing opinions to this, but the ginger haired male had began to make correlations between the days of An's endless complaints in the morning, and the days in which she had the most energy across their choreographies. And you would think, hypothetically, that would be a good thing- a great one even- simply five minutes of blabbering and they could continue on with their day without a stress.
Well for Akito Shinonome, life wasn't that simple. Truly, it never was , because the vendetta the world had against him never showed mercy.
Amidst the tranquil golden lighting of the sekai's Crase Cafe, showering everyone in a sunkissed glow, he was relishing in the sweet aromas of the delicacy before him. In that moment, nothing but the mouthwatering cloud-like texture and the strong flavours of his favourite pancakes had mattered. Here, in his own bubble, he relished in the juicy bursts of flavour from the fruit toppings, as the butter melted the fluffy stacks of the delectable pastry perfectly into his mouth. His senses where enveloped in the warmth which still lingered on the pastry, not too hot to burn but hot enough to circle in his chest and across his limbs until all he could do was sigh at the heavenly feeling.
That was until An had decided to open her mouth. Within moments, the paradise he had dreamed of halted with a choke on his latest bite, causing him to double over and splutter until he felt the food lodged in his throat escape its entrapment. Releasing a staggered breath, he finally sat back up, and there his swift moment of peace came and went- for he was hurled back into the reality of the golden eyed girl staring deep into the depths of his very soul. It was a gaze so rabid, in fact, he almost didn't notice the gentle hand resting on his shoulder blades until it was slowly lifted off and returned to its comfortable place resting on the black coffee cup on the table.
Toya Aoyagi's crystal gaze had always been gentle- determined but fragile. However, even the very eyes he had fell endlessly lost in before were impossible to gaze up at now, for even they could not condense the shock from the statement which still commanded the cafe. All around him suddenly felt too quiet- from the lack of a strong breeze against the windows to the kitchen appliances remaining unused. Hauntingly, even Meiko, who was previously drying dishes, had silently slid out to the storage room while he was distracted on his dearest meal.
For ironies sake, they really should've just shined a spotlight on him and given him a microphone too. He could be the next big hit stand up comedy act with the feature of all the dumb shit he had accomplished in his life.
He mourned the lost of his pancakes thoroughly, making a promise to dive into them later (as if it would be the same once the heat had went away) and glared back at those damning golden eyes. With the sharp stare Shiraishi was giving him now, one would suspect she was attempting to murder him on the spot- which he had grown familiar with overtime, but still didn't make him any less at ease. Strands of her regularly straightened hair were out of place, almost falling into her own fruit flavoured tea if it wasn't for her partners quick thinking in shifting it away. Kohane, unlike the other two was the only one avoiding looking into Akito's direction, flush prominent on her round cheeks. Often-time, in his hazed mind on hotter mornings, he would see little round ears on the top of her head, twitching to match her expressions. Hypothetically, they would be drooping in embarrassment or shame at this current moment- Akito didn't know which one would be worse. And yet, he couldn't feel bad for his smaller bandmate, maybe later, but certainly not now.
Right now, she was a traitor. One which had shared an intimate secret to An Shiraishi of all people.
Truly all of this irked him to a degree; that memory was something he had always wanted to bury dead. It damaged a pride which was already lacklustre to begin with, and for it to be damaged by Kohane of all people? With a defeated sigh, he would tear his gaze from the seething blue haired waitress to instead look at his singing partner, a boy created from the beauty of the sunlight itself. He knew that if he never wanted to open his mouth- to shove the truth in a little box, lock it up and throw away the key? Toya wouldn't question it with a second thought. Even now, Toyas kindness extended beyond his own beliefs, for there ready for Akito to take, was his sugar loaded latte in his hands, prepared to be offered to help the other with his coughing fit. It wasn't water, but Akito accepted it nonetheless, slurping the latte down enough that he felt the sweet taste clear the hoarseness of his mouth and his mind from unease. He settled the cup down slowly, ignoring the raised brow from An as he instead kept his focus on the dual toned haired boy bedsides him.
He wasn't entirely sure why he felt like he had to explain himself to Toya above all in the group. Perhaps it was Toya’s overflowing respect for Akito which made him feel obligated to explain himself, or perhaps the way his mouth spilled so effortlessly around the taller's presence. However, he wouldn't leave that damn seat until he at least confronted the sudden allegation.
With a heavy sigh, he'd try to bite back his irritation of the impromptu confession.
"Kohane was my second kiss. Not my first," he exclaimed, before daring to spare a look to the other two girls across the table, "I was doing a favour for her, nothing more."
Ans face had paled, her tanned skin seeming almost green as the girl turned to Kohane, gently looping her arms around the flushing girl and carding her fingers across the silky locks of her pigtails. Within moments, the blonde hair was being twirled within her fingers; a calming serenade.
"My poor Kohane," An would dramatically weep, earning an irritated groan from the ginger boy- which truly only riled her up more, "my poor, poor partner. I'm so sorry you had to kiss that ugly toad!"
Amidst An's insults (again, a normality), Kohane's flustered stutters and the goddamn pure look of confusion on Toya’s blemish-less face, Akito couldn't even begin to fathom the idea of being compared to a 'toad'. No, not when an injustice was unfolding against his very eyes. What was once the soft glow of the lights was now an aching vivid flash of different lights stabbing into his mind. He was tired, internally begging for the comforts of his bed, and it wasn't even noon.
"Better than kissing you!" Akito would growl, frankly too embarrassed from the ridiculous comment and too tired to even process his words, "who the hell manages to bash someone's head instead of kissing them, you-"
Before the hurl of creative insults could escape his mouth, An had slapped her hand across Akito's mouth, harsh enough that he was almost relieved the pained groan which had escaped his mouth was muffled. Yet the damage had already been done. Kohane's and Toya's eyes were wide, conflicted at who to look at until they found themselves looking between each other. They had always been the brighter half of the squad, so it didn't take long for a stunned Kohane to break into the awkward quiet.
"Shinonome," she had muttered with a small voice, as if it to test the waters of what she was suspecting, "Yo- your first kiss was An?"
Silence.
An, as if frozen in stone, didn't move her hand from Akito's mouth. Meanwhile, it wasn't as if Akito himself wanted to try and explain them both, so he let his mouth remain clamped. The shocked exchanged glances between Kohane and Toya drifted into looks of bewilderment- almost anticipation- as they eyed their silent companions until they, very slowly, caved. After all, to have Toya's silver eyes on him so intently, as if to read the secrets of his very thoughts, was an overwhelming sensation. Where the lights of the cafe were causing Akito to physically recoil, the light had glistened over Toya’s features, sharpening them, while still preserving the softness of his lips and skin. For many, including Akito, they believe Toya could have been a model in another life for his face alone, for a single speck of a look into his eyes was addictive to that of a drug.
A gorgeous killer, Akito had pondered more often than he'd like to admit. He decided to ignore the following thought in his head saying he would- very easily- become his first victim.
After all, Toya was his dearest friend; his singing partner and nothing else. Nothing more.
Where Toya was making Akito falter, Kohane’s round, mocha coloured eyes must've simply been too much for An's rapidly beating heart. For before Akito could even shift, An had ripped her hand from him- like one would retreat from a disease- and instead focused on squeezing her smaller partner until Kohane's cheeks blossomed with a burning crimson.
"Oh, Kohane!" She'd exclaim with a passion that could've rivalled that damn Tenma. "Our kiss was eons ago! It doesn't count at all- I promise!"
Akito had to resist each urge in his body to leave the cafe through the window as An attempted to excuse something which didn't even necessarily need an excuse in the first place. However, Toyas arm was awfully close to circling his back for comfort, and Kohane was much too nice to potentially traumatise through his irrationality. So, evaluating his options to some degree, he'd lean back and let Toya's arm envelop him in a much needed side embrace. Within moments, Toya had caught onto Akito's wishes, tugging over his singing partner until they were shoulder to shoulder. While their arms were hidden in sight with the table, An and her detective skills immediately eyed the two, yet never said a word.
For as annoying as she was, she wasn't half-bad at being Akito's 'self-nominated' wing-woman when she knew how to be quiet.
"Besides," An disrupted his thoughts, gazing toward Akito's emerald eyes with an expression indiscernible, "Akito's kissing is so bad, I learnt I was a lesbian a week later."
Nevermind. He needed to fire her, fast.
As if the morning couldn't get any more humiliating, Kohane- sweet, kind, gentle Kohane- she did not look to Akito with sympathy, nor did she hush her girlfriend down to normal. No, she instead burst into a set of giggles herself, shocking even An, as the blonde clutched her stomach to calm her laughing fit. And to top it all off,
"I did the exact same thing! I asked Shinonome to kiss me to see what my preferences were. It didn't feel right at all- I think that's when I also learned I prefer girls."
Screw rationality, the window was looking like an amazing option now.
He was staring down at his half-eaten food, his appetite long gone. His delectable pancakes, now left to soak in the butter until they were soggy. He couldn't even spare a glance up to Toya, whose hand had yet to leave his pitiful shoulder, for the absolute humiliation was too much to physically bear. It wasn't as if he was exactly happy that he was kissing half of his squad, rather a bit more disappointed. The one person he would actually want to kiss was- well-
Admits the giggling of the two girls, Toya had remained quiet, considerate, or perhaps just a bit clueless. Now that Akito was thinking about it, he had never actually heard Toya comment about his own love life, let alone his interest in others. It wasn't as if he was incapable of finding a relationship- for his looks easily countered that- however across the years they knew each other, Akito had simply concluded it wasn't one of his interests. Rather, with the amount of dedication the boy put into his studies, he perhaps simply didn't have the time for such. It was almost admirable; his concentration was beyond limits and his memory was unmatched, as if his very brain was constructed to imitate that of a computer system. It was one of the many attributes which had students at their school fascinated by, if they weren't already struck dead by Toya's model face alone. Yet with how incredibly humble Toya was about it all too? Textbook definition for perfection. He was almost, almost, jealous of the boy, if it weren't for the special way he instead made his heart thump on a daily basis.
Damn it, maybe it was the heat, or the current embarrassment, but Akito was feeling a lost more attached to his partner than usual. Worst of all, he didn't exactly mind it all that much.
Toya's hand on his shoulder was naturally cool, icy even, only warmed slightly through holding his back coffee for so long. It left an imprint through his jackets and onto his skin, leaving a tickling, tingling sensation. Was it just him, or was the room heating up now- the lights even more damning, for he suddenly felt claustrophobic. He tussled with his jacket until it slid off his shoulders, Toya's hand shifting away as he revealed the skin of his arms to the cafes atmosphere. It had cooled him, for a few seconds, before his partners hand had rested on his shoulder once again, and suddenly it had only felt hotter. A fruitless attempt, but dammit, he tried at least.
A saving grace had, at the very least, showed him mercy, for the girls laughter had seemingly died down into their own conversation. If he just so happened to hear his name once or twice, he made the wise decision to block it out, instead reaching for his latte again and taking the final gulps of what was another perfect Meiko recipe. He bravely looked to his partner, who was still owlishly staring at him in return, and was that a small smug grin hiding on his face?
"You okay, Akito?"
Honest answer: no. He was still considering his option of flinging himself out the window and it still felt like they were dining at an active volcano. Yet all he could do to answer was groan, leaning back against the booths leather headrest in hopes that the cool sensation of the material would relax his head. Toya seemed to catch on, for after some muffled words to someone behind him, a generous amount of water was soon placed before Toya. Uttering a thanks- to who Akito could only presume as a reappeared Meiko- Toya shifted to drink over to his respective partner, who downed half of it under the span of a few seconds, sighed, and settled the glass on the table with a thankful gaze in Toya's direction. At the very least, he felt somewhat functional now, and thus shuffled closer to his partner to fall into small talk of their own.
"Don't mind those two," he'd mutter, sending a wary glance to the girls still laughing about something Kohane had said, "besides, does anyone even care about being someone's first kiss anymore?" Toya merely shrugged: a boy of few words. Though it only supported Akito's theory that he never actually cared about this sort of thing in the first place. Instead, he took a long sip of the gross concoction he called black coffee, and hummed in satisfaction as if it wasn't the most bitter and sickening drink Akito had ever had the misfortune of briefly tasting once in the past.
Another enigma to Toya Aoyagi to add to the list, he supposed, how the fuck did he drink that crap all day?
"I guess it's special for some people," Toya would respond absentmindedly, more focused on his coffee above all else, "to know that out of everyone on earth, you have the privilege of being able to show love to your favourite person." He'd swirl the cup in his hand and raise it to his lips, taking a small sip with a soft sigh. Akito watched him intently, darting his eyes from the horrid mixture of coffee, to the way Toyas long lashes fluttered gently as he squinted his eyes. Akito couldn't help but sulk a little, because of course Toya Aoyagi also somehow is a master in romantic feelings after never being in a relationship in his life.
"Is it special for you?" Akito questioned, entranced at the way Toya lowered the cup from his lips to look over at him. His partners hair, unlike his own, remained styled, effortlessly framing his face. His piercing, which he insisted on matching with Akito, was glistening alongside their matching necklaces, only making Toya shine bright amidst the harsh cafe lighting. Akito let out a shaky gulp, the wall pattern behind Toya suddenly looking very interesting.
Ah yes, what a fascinating brick wall. Its texture was outstanding. Very crumbly.
Toya gently shrugged his shoulders, eyes piercing as he looked at Akito's movements quizzically, sparing a second to also look back at the wall behind him, as if the crevices of the bricks would uncover what was going on within Akito's head. When he saw nothing, he'd look back toward Akito, a new amusement tugging on his sickeningly sweet smile.
"I suppose so," he'd conclude with a hum to his voice; a melody, "I never cared for such things outside my novels. Though I wouldn't want a stranger to be my first kiss-"
"-What?"
An gawked at Toya from across the table, her brows raised and a flustered Kohane still squished within her arms. The blonde nudged at Ans side, before shooting Toya a sympathetic glance.
"Sorry for listening in Aoyagi," she'd mutter, ignoring the whines of the blue haired girl besides her clutching her side, "it's not a bad thing if you haven't had your first kiss yet. Everyone takes their own pace with these sorts of things after all."
"It's not a problem, Azusawa." Toya responded, looking over at An with slight concern as she lifted her head to lean against Kohane's side with a sulk, nudging her head into her jacket.
'Like a damn dog', Akito rolled his eyes, ignoring how easy it would be to also lay his head on Toyas shoulder right now, in a platonic fashion, obviously. He took secret pride in being the one to help Toya with his street fashion, for it meant that Akito could pick the most comfortable outfits across the rarest occasion of actually being able to spoil the boy. Admits his thinking, he briefly heard An's hyperbolic cries, "you're stronger than you think, Kohane." Earning a scoff from the ginger haired boy, he'd scowl a quiet "deserved" in return. While An shot him a glare, he found that the angry and blue human chihuahua's wrath worth it, for Toya's quiet chuckle made everything up to that very moment all easily worthwhile.
His voice was irrefutably Akito's favourite- from the gentle undertones which made his voice so angelic, to the power which he could muster during the height of their songs, reverberating through Akito's chest and becoming ingrained in his bones. Toya's voice was a blessing: a one of a kind melody which he was thankful for hearing every single day.
All from those damn pair of lips.
"You could definitely kiss whoever you wanted." he muttered, earning a snort from An- as if she wasn't just whining like a toddler. He ignored her.
"Just do what you want man," he'd say, turning to Toya, "kiss whoever, kiss whenever, doesn't matter as long as it's legal and shit."
"Yes, of course." Toya responded, eyes squinted in amusement and his smile relaxed. Akito's heart skipped a beat, and once again the brick wall looked very interesting.
A comfortable silence washed over the four, five-if you counted Meiko bringing them all new refreshments. Kohane had found immense joy in decorating her coffee, while An found equal, if not more joy, watching her with lovesick eyes. Akito found his own interest in playing with the soggy pancakes on his plate, cutting up the pieces smaller and smaller until they became mush. Perhaps it was childish, but it brought him a spark of joy which kept his mind occupied.
So much so, he didn't notice the pair of silver eyes on him until he heard his voice. As he sipped on the fresh taste of the latte, a quiet whisper burned in his ear.
"Then could I kiss you, Akito?"
It was the second time Akito choked that day.
-
The other three agreed to postpone practise after Akito's second brush with death. Instead, Kohane- arguably the most worried of them all- pleaded for him to instead go home and rest. Despite trying to insist he was okay, An had shut him down, confirming that they had practise tomorrow and that yes, 'they'll be perfectly fine missing one day'. As for Toya, well, he hadn't said anything, only wordlessly stared into the abyss his black coffee. Without much of a choice, he had stood himself up, grabbing his phone out to press untitled when he took one last glance at his singing partner.
His shoulders were rigid: tense. Meanwhile, his hair fell forward, covering his expression from Akito's view of his side. However, through the strands he could see the remains of a flush on the other's cheeks. His words ran faster than a mantra within Akito's mind, a constant bug in his head saying 'yes, you heard correctly' and 'yes, Toya wanted to kiss you.'
If it wasn't for how genuine Toya's voice had sounded- if it wasn't for the gentle tone he preserved for the three of them at the table- he would have definitely convinced himself it was a fabrication by now.
With a shuddery breath, he patted Toya's shoulder lightly.
"I'll talk to you later, partner, yeah?"
He was nervous, but the way Toyas face glowed with jubilation made it oh so worth it.
"Of course, thank you Akito."
And that's how he ended up laid down on his bed, phone on his messaging app, trying to construct a text which may make or break his most treasured relationship.
Arguably, this is something he shouldn't be worrying about in the first place. Toya wanted to kiss him, and holy crap, did Akito want to kiss him in return and in the least platonic way possible. Yet despite the given fact, there was the tiny, tiny voice hidden at the back of his head, saying Toya was simply joking. That he didn't mean it, and Akito was the one who overreacted to such a harmless joke.
'Akito, he'd never think of you that way'
'Akito, why would you even think such a thing?'
'Akito, why can't you take a joke?'
'Akito'
'Ak-ito"
"Akito!!!"
Weird, his little evil voice started to sound strangely like his sister.
A fat pillow in his face made it click, 'oh, it is my sister'. Lifting his head, he saw the enraged brunette by the door, another of her laced silk pillows in hand ready to hurl it at his face again. At seeing his expression, the girl simply huffed, making note to stomp across his floor as she reached his bedside.
"I've called you for the last three minutes! What the fuck do you want for lunch?" She yelled, leaning over his figure as she glared into his soul. With a groan, he simply clutched the pillow he was so ruthlessly attacked with, rolling away from her as he continued to look at Toya's contact in his phone. He almost swiped away in defeat when he felt the creak of his bed dripping, and a hand on his shoulder.
"Oi, you're not feisty like usual," Ena would mutter, her voice abnormally soft. She took a glance to her brother's phone, and sighed as she raised her brow, "you fought with your boyfriend again?"
"Not my boyfriend," he'd sulk, wishing he could hide under the covers and rot there, never to be seen again, "it's none of your business."
"It definitely is," she tugged at his shoulder until he rolled over to face her, eyes shifting between the tired eyes of her brother and the phone clutched uncomfortably tight in his hand, "I care for Toya and you know that. And you're my brother-"
"Okay, fuck-" Akito would groan, chucking his phone to the side and curling into the soft pink pillow. He'd never admit it, but it was way nicer than his own.
"Toya wanted to kiss me."
Ena remained silent, looking across Akito's distraught expression. It made him uncomfortable to the point that he hid his head in the pillow instead, whining as he did so.
"Say something!"
"Say what?" She cried, lifting the pillow from his head and glaring down at him, "I don't see the issue here, is this not a good thing?"
Akito sulked at the loss off the pillow, instead putting his hands to his hair, twisting it and messing with the lower strands.
"Technically," he'd mutter, looking at anywhere but at his sister staring daggers at him. The brick wall of his bedroom saved him once again, "but what if he's just joking around, fucking with me, you know?"
"No, I don't know!" Ena sighed, dramatically resting her head in her hands for a moment before aggressively grabbing his jacket to sit him up.
"I can't believe I have to say this, are you that stupid?" She'd yell, and Akito could tell she genuinely wondered that, "this is Toya Aoyagi we are talking about here, your partner, Akito. The nicest boy we have both ever met."
He couldn't respond, mainly because it was embarrassing how true the words were, but he never liked admitting Ena was right.
From always keeping him safe on the streets by walking on the side near the road, to the never-ending compliment's on Akito's choreographies and music, to keeping him up with notes from classes he sometimes didn't even attend himself. It was all so sappy; all so Toya.
Shit, maybe Toya does want to kiss him. Like a kiss on the lips.
Where was his phone?
He shuffled his head around to look across the bed, his actions more frantic once he realised he actually threw it a lot further than his anticipated. It wasn't until he was interrupted by a cough, and his phone almost chucked at his face from his sister. He was too high on adrenaline to care; he needed to message Toya.
Gripping his phone the right way round (thank god), he quickly fiddled with the buttons until he was back on Toyas contact, and even looking at their previous messages had revived the tingling feeling in his chest. Ena looked upon him with a heavy sigh, reminding herself that they were, in fact, from the same blood.
"Akito?"
"Hm?" He'd mutter, already in his own universe of him and his phone.
"Look after yourself and Toya, yeah?"
And while Ena didn't see it, his mouth twitched upward, concealed by his phone. Yet she knew he had heard, for the dumb way he was kicking his feet back and forth in excitement was obvious enough. 'Just like a dog' she pondered, quietly stepping toward the door and sparing one final glance at her brother. If she smiled at the sight of the younger boy, that would be a secret she kept to herself.
'I'm glad you're happier, Akito.'
She slowly went to close the door, but stoped herself, because she had almost forgotten,
"And text me your fucking lunch order!"
"I will, now get out!"
Siblings will be siblings.
-
'You can kiss me. If you still want to.'
After careful consideration, that was the painfully simple text Akito had sent Toya that night. So simple in fact, Akito was still unsure how Toya hadn't took back his choice.
But he hadn't; he had the orange heart that was sent seconds after as proof.
So the moment practise ended at the Sekai the next day, Akito waited for An and Kohane to rush arm-in-arm into the cafe, to drag Toya to the nearest alleyway. He tugged him along until they were far enough that the girls got the hint and left them alone for a while. Once he was satisfied, he let go of Toya's jacket- another which he had helped him buy- and looked up to him with panting breath still being recovered after their latest choreography. Seriously, the one day they chose for him to be in the centre…
Now he was drenched in sweat, his shirt uncomfortably sticking to the skin across his back, and he certainly smelled worse than he looked. Even his jewellery felt suffocating, for he constantly had to tug at the necklace across his neck to make sure it hadn't fused to his skin.
Toya, meanwhile, looked perfect, because of course he did.
While he was also sweating- perhaps even more than Akito- rather than being the epitome of a drenched kitten, he still maintained his elegant glow. Only baby strands of his hair had stuck to his face, and his cheeks were only vaguely flushed making him look flustered rather than him or An, who had resembled tomatoes (much to her displeasure). Above all else, his smile was blinding, the adrenaline of their practise leaving him wide-eyed and giddy, much like Akito.
What was probably worst of all for him was the way Toya was frequently remaining much more refreshed with drinks compared to the rest of them, so Akito always found himself being goddamn entranced- from the way his adam apple bobbed to the way Toya would send him subtle glances as he licked his lips.
That complete and utter asshole. He knew what he was doing, and it was working.
Now he was looking down at him, leaning against the wall with a slight raise of his brow and an indefinite smile etched into his face, merely watching as Akito recovered all the oxygen which had escaped him across practise.
"Are you okay, Akito?" He asked, his voice soft and laced with concern and a false innocence. It just made his face burn further, because as much as he knew Toya was definitely taking joy from this, he still fell entranced with the harmony of his voice.
"No," he'd exasperate, finally standing properly to face that damn smug smile, "do I look like I am?"
Toya simply chuckled, turning his head to explore the alleyway Akito had dragged him into. Like many of the streets lined around him, the vivid shapes of graffiti art encapsulated the brick walls, shone life to what would've been an endless array of brown. Where the paint ended, the posters began- each more colourful than the last- as they loudly proclaimed the names of different live events across the years.
They'd surpass those events, he was sure of it, especially with his squad and partner by his side.
"There could be a vending machine up ahead," Toya muttered, finally turning to the ginger haired boy, who was still painted with ruddy cheeks, "want to grab a drink? I can pay."
The offering, while generous (because of course it was, this was Toya), made Akito shake his head. With a trembling leg, he'd step forward, until he could graze the hand of the other boy.
'Surely this is a bit too fast.' Akito pondered with a sigh, trying to ignore the way Toya was intensely staring at him, because that was not helping his brain and his thinking. In fact, any circuits in his brain were probably fried long ago.
This wasn't like with An, where they were two young, frankly quite stupid, kids trying to figure out who they were. Nor was it like with Kohane, whose expression to discover her identity touched Akito enough to agree and help her out.
No, this was a boy, a boy he was very interested in and a boy who was potentially interested in him back.
'Ah, fuck it,' Akito concluded with himself, 'as long as we look after each other, right? That's what Ena said. I think.'
It was one of the very rare occasions he thanked his sister's input, before taking the final step to intertwine Toya's fingers with his own. They were slender but calloused; hardened by the years of practise across the violin. But that was alright, for they matched Akito's own rough fingers in a way, even if his was from the scraps he got into as a kid. Toya's hand was stiff at first- unsure of what to do- before he slowly found himself returning the grip on Akito's hand.
Okay, holding hands, progress!
"Actually," Akito began, his voice hoarse and words cracking, maybe he did need a drink, "that's not why I wanted to come here."
Toya remained still, frozen like ice, for mere moments long enough to make Akito wonder if it wasn't still too late to run away. Yet he stayed, both because he was way too close to back out now- and Ena would murder him if he did so. Eventually, Toya's expression shifted, his eyes widening and eyebrows raised, and while it would be hard to notice for most, Akito may or may not have noted Toyas ears growing redder.
"Oh," Toya gasped, his hand squeezing onto Akito's a little more tighter, "you want me to kiss you."
'Shit, he makes he sound so casual.'
Digging a grave for his pride, Akito bashfully nodded, shifting around on one of his feet as he mumbled.
"Yeah, if you want, or I can like- kiss you or somethin'."
Smooth, real smooth. Fucking incredible.
Luckily, Toya actually heard him and nodded so naturally you'd think he'd be talking about the bloody weather.
"You have the better experience," Akito would beg to differ, "I'll let you take the lead."
Okay, yeah. No problem. He's got this. Kissing his best friend of like three years- easy enough.
He didn't really want to mention that he had, in fact, not initiated any of his first kisses. So instead, he took shaky steps forward until he could practically feel Toya's breathing on his face, and shit, he thinks both of their breathing is irregular now.
Up close, Toya's skin was pale and smooth, to the perfection of which Akito was almost positive the Tenma's have given him skincare products. His brows were neat, unlike his own, and his hair was only slightly tussled from the light breeze across the alleyway. The moles which decorated his face were what caught his eye more often than not, followed by the icy glaciers of his irises, which endlessly pulled him in like metal to a magnet, until he found himself loosing hours of his day if it weren't for someone snapping him back to reality. He was just that naturally attractive, that elegant. Otherworldly, even, because surely perfection shouldn't be this normalised.
Crap, he was lucky, wasn't he? So lucky- lucky enough to meet Toya Aoyagi in this lifetime. From his singing, to his charm, to his damn never ending kindness.
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, thought 'fuck it', and leaned in.
And leaned. And leaned.
"Ow!"
He opened his eyes, Toya had hit his head against the brick wall.
Damn wall, it had betrayed him.
"Dude, you know you lean forward, not backwards." Akito muttered with a raised brow, watching in slight concern as Toya rubbed the back of his head with a wince on his features.
"I know that," Toya sighed, squinting as he traced the bump over his head, "I'm sorry, it was just instinct. I've never done this before, so-"
"It's cool, it's cool" Akito stuttered, reaching to also check Toya's head, but stopping himself as for goodness sake, 'his face was already red enough.' He instead shifted his shaking hand to land across the side of Toya's face, and in what was probably his smartest move of the day,
"I'll hold you, yeah? So like, just push me away if you're uncomfortable."
Toya didn't respond, simply closed his eyes and leaned into Akito's hand, because of course, he just had to make this ten times more difficult for him to mentally handle. He tried to ignore the rapid thumping of his own heart, and pulled their faces together to close the gap.
Toya's lips were unsurprisingly soft, making him melt into the kiss like butter. The hand still locked with his squeezed gently as Toya curled his other arm around Akito's side. He felt like completely and utter jelly; shaky and practically falling into his partners grip as he squeezed his eyes shut tightly.
'Shit, we're actually doing it!’
And it was good, perfect even. Until Akito had to pull away coughing his lungs out. Toya watched, baffled, as his partner looked away and let go of Toyas face, instead bringing his hand up to his lips. He anxiously let go of the grip onto Akito's side, bringing his hand up to his own lips. He felt alright, close to ecstatic, so what was the issue?
Did Akito not like it? Was he weirded out?
He was about to let go of Akito's hand, when he felt other boy's grip tighten. Akito gazed up at the frightened boy, recovering from his coughing fit, and let out a shaky breath.
'Shit,' he thought, 'that taste-’
"Did you have black coffee during practice?"
Toya paused, for a moment, before it clicked.
"Oh." he whispered, covering his hand to his mouth, hiding the way his face slowly burned.
"Akito, I'm so sorry-"
"No-" Akito refuted, letting out a soft sigh, "it's okay, it just caught me off guard."
Toya looked unconvinced though, darting his eyes away from Akito's face as he lowered his hand from his mouth. Akito could see the redness of his cheeks; a rarity he'd treasure if it wasn't for his distress. He looked toward the cafe, before turning back to look into Akito's eyes once again, a small, disappointed frown drooping onto his face.
Curse him for being so considerate, the sickly bile in his stomach sat uncomfortably alongside his guilt.
"Kohane always carries mints," Toya muttered, his voice weak from embarrassment, "I can quickly grab some? Or maybe-"
In an act of panic, Akito reached to hold Toya's face again, his gentle but wide silver eyes gazing up at him as if he was a cat which just knocked over a vase. His mind drifted back to their conversation the day before in that moment, of Toya gripping his coffee cup in his hand, his shoulders shrugging once Akito had asked him if he found the concept of a first kiss special.
"I suppose so" he had said, in that oh so calm melodic voice he owned, and it dawned upon him that shit, Toya really wanted this, and wanted to get it right.
He wanted it to be special.
He'd make it special if it was the last thing he did, dammit.
"Toya," Akito muttered, mustering up all the courage he had left in his body, letting the words fall as smoothly as possible, "I really like you, alright? No matter what. I don't care about the damn coffee, like I said, just caught me off guard." He let out a deep breath, the oxygen in his lungs scarce as he stretched his mouth into a weak smile.
"I really want you to kiss me again, is that okay?"
His partner avoided his gaze for a moment, instead finding interest in their conjoined hands. Upon instinct, Akito squeezed them together, and Toya's tense shoulders deflated with a shaky breath.
"Yeah, okay, I like you too, Akito." he began, a small smile gracing his lips, 'thank god,'
"Let's try again, one last time, before the girls get worried."
"Course," Akito grinned, his nerves toppled by the pure adrenaline in his veins, "besides, we can always try later."
Toya's face brightened, looking back up at his partner with a relieved smile, nodding in return. This time, Toya had leaned in, and Akito shut his eyes.
It was slow, but soft, and slightly longer than the previous two attempts. Toya smile was unmistakable against his own lips, and Akito wouldn't be surprised to know he as also stupidly grinning. Their proximity meant he could feel the rapid beating of Toyas heart; the largest sign that he was enjoying this as much as Akito, and it only made him melt closer. It was perfect- once he ignored the bitter taste of Toya's lips, one he'd likely grow familiar with. But that was okay, great even, because it was Toya, and he was Akito.
Yeah, forget the first kiss, and the second, because neither of them mattered to him now.
The third time's a charm.