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Mornings have quickly become one of Xie Lian’s favourite times of the day. Who can blame him when they almost always start with him wound up in his husband’s arms, warm and cozy and content? Often, like this morning, Hua Cheng is awake and waiting for Xie Lian to join him in consciousness, smiling down at him with such fondness it’s almost overwhelming.
Face still half-buried in his pillow, Xie Lian thinks sleepily, So handsome…
He just about registers Hua Cheng’s brow being raised. “Oh? Gege’s coming on quite strong this morning.”
Xie Lian blinks at him, confused. “Huh…?”
Hua Cheng chuckles, reeling Xie Lian in so they’re chest to chest. His lips are warm against Xie Lian’s forehead. “Gege is so cute when he’s still half-asleep.”
“San Lang, at least give me a minute before you start bullying me,” he complains, but limply throws his arms around Hua Cheng to squeeze him even closer.
“This San Lang would never bully his husband,” Hua Cheng feigns and Xie Lian snorts.
Uh huh, then why do I feel so sore all over? he thinks, but he’s not mad in the slightest as he tips his head back for his first kiss of the day. In fact: Last night was good…
Hua Cheng tenses against him, which is unusual. Xie Lian draws back, confused.
“San Lang…? Are you okay?” he asks, and thinks offhandedly, Oh gosh, I hope my breath doesn’t stink…
“Gege’s breath is fine,” Hua Cheng assures him slowly.
Ah! Xie Lian jolts. “D-did I say that out loud?!” he says, a little embarrassed.
“... No,” Hua Cheng says, which…
“Huh?” Xie Lian says again. So… how can….?
“Gege,” Hua Cheng starts, drawing back slightly to look at him. “Think something for me. Anything.”
Think something? What’s there to think about? I’m practically still asleep, I don’t know what to think about!
Like he can hear Xie Lian struggle, Hua Cheng suggests a little slyly, “Maybe think about last night? Did gege enjoy himself?”
Enjoy myself? Is this guy crazy?! I’m honestly scared half of Ghost City heard me!
Before Xie Lian can scold him for planting such thoughts in his head, Hua Cheng’s face breaks out into a huge, shit-eating grin. “Don’t worry, gege,” he says, so ridiculously smug. “You sound very nice when I’m fucking you so hard.”
What?!
“S-San Lang!” Xie Lian sits up in an instant. “W-Wh… How did you—?!”
Still sprawled out himself with his chin propped up on his hand, Hua Cheng smirks. “I can hear gege’s thoughts,” he explains, and—
Oh no!
Xie Lian buries his face in his hands, his face burning hot. “A-are you sure?!”
“Gege called me handsome when he first woke up, right? Now that I think back, I don’t think I saw his lips moving when I heard that. And it was the same when he mentioned being sore. Gege didn’t say that out loud either, did he?”
“Stop! Stop it, stop it!” Xie Lian leaps forward to cover Hua Cheng’s mouth with his hands. “S-San Lang, you… You really heard all that?”
“En,” Hua Cheng hums against Xie Lian’s palms, pressing a sweet kiss to them. “I’m so glad to hear gege had fun last night. San Lang did, too.”
You don’t have to tell me that, the way you were… Xie Lian forcibly trails off when he sees his husband’s brows rise to his hairline again. Fuck! Oh my god!
Delighted, Hua Cheng laughs. “Is such language needed, gege?” he teases.
Like San Lang didn’t describe our lovemaking as “fucking” just now! Xie Lian groans. How do I stop this?! San Lang, don’t listen! Stop! Why is this happening?!
Sitting up to pull Xie Lian into his lap, Hua Cheng manages to tug his hands away from his mouth to let him speak. “Gege, it’s okay. This one was just having some fun. I’m sorry, I’ll try to behave.”
Then don’t smile like that! Bad husband!
Hua Cheng laughs again, throwing his head back. Xie Lian flushes from head to toe.
“You’re bullying me again!” Xie Lian accuses, pushing Hua Cheng down so he’s flat on his back.
“Sorry, gege, this time I mean it, I promise,” Hua Cheng says, his laughter subsiding. “I’m wondering if this could have anything to do with that spirit we got rid of yesterday.”
Thinking back, it’s quite likely Hua Cheng is right. A few days ago, a number of prayers came in from a village with its people complaining about this pesky spirit that wouldn’t leave them be. It wasn’t anything really malicious, at least not in the traditional sense. It caused no bodily harm, but it certainly did stir up some trouble for a lot of people, instead forcing everyone’s thoughts to become public to the rest of them. For a little bit, it was almost funny, because it made for some silly situations. But then things got out of hand, and petty thoughts that don’t really mean much but are better left private came to light which ruffled some feathers and sparked a lot of arguments. Things like, My cow makes better milk than yours! or Wow, this person is really annoying me today for some reason. That, and it was becoming harder and harder to sleep in the village because of it, people’s thoughts carrying on into the night. Everyone was keeping each other up, and no one could function even half as well during the day with how tired they all were.
Having caught wind of these complaints, Xie Lian told Hua Cheng about them and asked if he wanted to tag along. Amused and always keen to accompany his husband on chores, Hua Cheng agreed easily, so off they went to visit the poor village. The moment they had arrived, Xie Lian understood exactly what they all meant. The whole place was buzzing with overlapping thoughts, loud enough to make it difficult to, funnily enough, hear yourself think! With a bit of difficulty, they managed to gather some further intel from the sleep deprived and irritated villagers, eventually locating the spirit who watched the whole mess from a big, wooded hill, giggling and snickering at the sight. It wasn’t very powerful at all, and Xie Lian dispersed it without even breaking a sweat, but now that he’s running through the events in his head again, he realises that as the spirit was disappearing, some of its qi hit him, causing a small coughing fit.
“Gege must have caught the tail end of the spirit’s curse,” Hua Cheng says.
Xie Lian sighs. “Of course. How annoying. Sorry, San Lang. Hopefully it stops soon…”
“Nothing to be sorry for, gege,” Hua Cheng soothes, his grin returning. “This one doesn’t mind at all.”
Uh huh, I bet, Xie Lian thinks glumly, only for his husband to laugh for the third time at his expense, and he’s not even been awake for ten minutes!
After some playful wrestling and even more laughter, the pair help each other get ready for the day. The entire time, Xie Lian forgets his husband can hear every thought that passes, which means the whole ordeal takes about twice as long with the way Hua Cheng keeps trying to get some fun reactions out of him. Xie Lian can’t even say he hates it. How many times had he been cursed inconveniently over the years when alone and just had to suck it up and even avoid people entirely until the qi faded? This is really quite nice, being able to laugh something as silly as this off with someone else, and when Hua Cheng hears Xie Lian reflect on this, he bundles him up in his arms for a tight hug, kissing Xie Lian’s face all over.
“San Lang!” Xie Lian giggles as Hua Cheng exaggerates every kiss with a mwah! “You’re so…!”
“So what, gege?” Hua Cheng asks between smacks.
Perfect, Xie Lian’s mind supplies. Wonderful, kind, sweet—ah, not again! he realises when Hua Cheng pulls back to look at him with a funny, self-satisfied sort of smile.
“His Highness flatters this lowly one,” he says, pressing a final kiss to Xie Lian’s lips.
Don’t call yourself—!
Hua Cheng whisks him away into the next room to brush his hair before he can finish the thought, erupting into even more giggles with how he feels Hua Cheng nuzzle his nose into the crook of his neck.
Even after taking breakfast in the garden together, Xie Lian’s thoughts are still loud and there for everyone to hear. Yin Yu, who comes by to give Hua Cheng a rundown of the city’s most pressing issues of the day, makes no comment when Xie Lian’s thoughts about the freshly bloomed flowers practically speak over him, which makes him think that Hua Cheng let Yin Yu know about the situation in advance.
Poor Yin Yu, Xie Lian can’t help but think, as amused as he is self-deprecating. He must be sick of me.
“Not at all,” Yin Yu replies before he properly registers Xie Lian hasn’t spoken out loud. “His Highness' presence is a welcome one. Ah…”
Thud! Xie Lian has dropped his head to the table in anguished embarrassment.
“Go,” Hua Cheng says, reaching over to stroke Xie Lian’s hair gently.
“Yes sir,” Yin Yu says, sounding a little embarrassed himself. My deepest apologies, Your Highness, he tacks on to Xie Lian in their private communication array, but I meant what I said. This one hopes you feel better soon.
It’s fine, Yin Yu, Xie Lian assures, but of course that just gives them both away, doesn’t it?
“I said go!” Hua Cheng raises his voice slightly.
“I’m gone, sir,” Yin Yu promises, and once he’s an acceptable distance away, Hua Cheng sighs softly.
“Sorry, gege, I did tell him to leave you be,” Hua Cheng says gently, the frosty edge to his voice melting all for him.
“It’s fine, San Lang, he was really nice about it. You don’t have to yell at him,” Xie Lian says into his arms, still warm in the face.
“How about gege and I take it slow today? We can just sit around in Paradise Manor until this passes, since I know it’s bothering gege a little.” When Xie Lian lifts his head to look at him, Hua Cheng has a strand of his hair pressed to his lips.
It’s so overwhelming when he does that… Xie Lian thinks and then winces. In a good way, in a good way! San Lang, please just ignore me…
“And what sort of husband would I be if I ignored my beloved?” Hua Cheng says, eye glinting. Xie Lian looks away, shaking his head, which makes Hua Cheng chuckle. “Come, gege. I would suggest we play a game of sorts, but I don’t think it’s fair if I know what sort of strategy you’re making in your head.”
“Maybe we can do a puzzle or something,” Xie Lian mumbles and allows Hua Cheng to help him to his feet, their hands joined as they leave the breakfast table to head inside.
They circle through a few activities to do together. Some things, like puzzles as Xie Lian suggested, keep him more focused for a while, but then he relaxes a bit too much and his thoughts wander. Hua Cheng then suggests they try and make a golden foil palace together, but at some point Xie Lian gets really picky and particular in a way that he worries is too bossy, so they bench that idea even though Hua Cheng swears with an evil grin that he quite likes it when Xie Lian takes charge like that. They have Hua Cheng read for him, but then Xie Lian fixates on how much he likes his voice too much, and after that they spar for a while which is heaps of fun, but like with certain games, Xie Lian gives himself away at times with his thoughts, even though most of his movement requires no real consideration.
It’s around lunchtime when Xie Lian remembers suddenly, almost falling on his face mid-yoga pose, “Oh no!”
Effortlessly balancing himself, Hua Cheng asks, “Gege? What’s wrong?”
“I’m meant to see Feng Xin and Mu Qing today! We made plans to meet up and do things, but they don’t know I’m like this!” Xie Lian stops posing in favour of rubbing his brow, getting a bit tired of all the issues this is causing him. “I can’t have them see me before this gets resolved. I should tell them I need to reschedule.”
“Unfortunately, they are gege’s friends. They will understand. If not…” Hua Cheng trails off, smirking.
“It’s fine, it’s fine,” he sighs. “I’ll just reach out to them in the array. I’ll explain better later on.”
“Sounds like a plan, gege. We’ll eat something afterwards and find something new to do.”
“Alright, give me a moment, I need to clear my head.” Xie Lian breathes in deeply and tries to quieten his thoughts. “Don’t come down here!” he hurries out into the private communication array shared by himself, Feng Xin and Mu Qing, then quickly shuts it to make sure none of his other thoughts leak into the space.
“Phew,” he says out loud, forehead resting against Hua Cheng’s shoulder in relief. “That should do it.”
It’s not such a bad thing anyway. It means I can spend the rest of the day with San Lan—oh gosh, not again.
Cheeks blazing, Xie Lian groans both in and outwardly, shielding his face with both his hands.
“Gege,” Hua Cheng says in that reverent voice again, his hand coming to cradle the back of Xie Lian’s head. “Please, this San Lang’s poor, dead heart can only take so much.”
Nuzzling further into his shoulder, Xie Lian complains, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I just can’t help it!” It’s not my fault that I—Oh, come on, San Lang! “Don’t laugh!”
Hua Cheng pulls him to his chest, encircling him with both arms and squeezing as he sways them both on the spot. “Apologies, gege,” he says between peals of laughter, not sounding very sorry at all. “You’re just so…” he trails off. Then Xie Lian feels the room turn a little colder out of nowhere, Hua Cheng’s killing aura spiking unusually considering the context.
“San Lang?” he asks, concerned as he peels himself away from Hua Cheng’s chest to search his face.
Brows drawn together and one eye narrowed with a dangerous glint, Hua Cheng gently but firmly maneuvers Xie Lian so he’s tucked behind him protectively. “That stupid idiot trash!” he hisses. “Gege, go back to our bedroom, and I’ll—”
“HUA CHENG!” Two voices ring loudly and clearly as quick footsteps approach the hall. Two voices Xie Lian recognises all too well.
Oh no, oh no, oh nooooo…!
“In there!” Mu Qing’s voice cuts through the otherwise quiet of the manor and Xie Lian makes a frustrated noise in the back of his throat, holding his head in his hands. He’s given their location away with his thoughts!
The door promptly bursts open, and Xie Lian sees that Feng Xin has all but kicked it clean off its frame. Before it can hurl towards where Xie Lian and Hua Cheng stand together, Hua Cheng reduces it to small and deadly splinters with an effortless flick of his hand, redirecting them towards Mu Qing and Feng Xin. Thankfully, the two of them summon their shields just in time to protect themselves from the debris, but it does nothing to calm the enraged expressions on their faces.
“CRIMSON RAIN!” Feng Xin bellows once he lowers his arms, baring teeth. “What are you doing with His Highness!”
“What are you doing in our home?” Hua Cheng snipes back in a frigid tone, yet as he says it he soothes Xie Lian by stroking his thumb over Xie Lian’s arm where he still holds it behind him. The sweet gesture works, and some of the tension in Xie Lian’s body loosens, though not all of it.
“We were meant to see Xie Lian today but he suddenly told us not to come,” Mu Qing explains sharply. “He sounded distressed and panicked. Has your composure finally cracked? Has that obsession of yours reared its ugly head? You won’t let anyone else have Xie Lian?”
You know what, sometimes I really wish that were the case… Xie Lian thinks in exasperation, rubbing his brow. What a mess…
Stunned silence. Xie Lian feels the hand around his arm flex.
“What the hell did you say?!” Mu Qing bursts out, disturbed.
What? Oh, for the love of—! He’s hidden behind Hua Cheng still! They didn’t see that he wasn’t speaking, so they don’t know these are his incredibly private and humiliating thoughts!
“Mind your own shitty business,” Hua Cheng snarls, hiding Xie Lian even more behind him, “and get out of our city.”
“Not without seeing His Highness is unharmed!” Feng Xin says hotly and Xie Lian sighs.
“San Lang, it’s okay. They’re here now so I might as well explain,” he relents.
“Gege, you don’t have to do anything at all,” Hua Cheng fusses, half-turning to frown at him.
Xie Lian lifts a hand to stroke back some of Hua Cheng’s hair out of his face. “It’s alright. I doubt they’ll leave until they hear it from me.” It seems Hua Cheng agrees, because he sighs as well and slowly steps out of Xie Lian’s way. Xie Lian clears his throat and addresses both Feng Xin and Mu Qing. “You guys really didn’t have to storm down here like that, you know. I didn’t mind you dropping by unannounced when I lived alone, but it really is quite rude of you to appear like this in mine and San Lang’s home. Especially when I told you not to come in the first place! Honestly…”
Both Mu Qing and Feng Xin’s expressions and body language change as Xie Lian speaks, going from guarded and on edge, to relieved and relaxing, to embarrassed and thoroughly scolded. It’s sort of funny how quickly they go through each stage, and Xie Lian would laugh if he wasn’t put off by the whole display.
“We’re… sorry, Your Highness,” Feng Xin says, bowing his head in shame. “We just wanted to make sure you were safe.”
“Of course I’m safe!” Xie Lian cries out, rubbing his brow. “I’m with San Lang! There’s nowhere safer. Do you both seriously still doubt that after everything?”
Dodging the question, Mu Qing spins this back around onto Xie Lian. “Fine then, we shouldn’t have come, but what made you reach out in such a panic? Are you sick or something?”
“Not… sick, no, not exactly…” Xie Lian scratches his cheek, feeling awkward now that the truth has to come out. “You see, San Lang and I went to investigate a spirit after I received a village's prayers a few days ago. We defeated it just fine, but I think I got hit with some of its dispersed energy as it was on its way out. So…”
Feng Xin’s eyes flash with concern. “So?! What the fuck happened? Are you dying or something?”
“Does he look like he’s dying to you? Better question is, is it infectious? Is that why you told us not to come? You look fine.” Mu Qing squints at him, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I’m fine physically, don’t worry,” Xie Lian assures. “It’s more… Ah, I’ll just show you.” He shakes his head decidedly and clamps his mouth shut. You see, it’s like this, he thinks and both Feng Xin and Mu Qing’s eyes widen.
“What the fuck!” Feng Xin bursts out. “What the fuck! What the fucking fuck! How the hell did you just talk?! Your mouth wasn’t moving!”
While Feng Xin bristles, Mu Qing’s face softens with clarity. “Are you stupid?” He whacks Feng Xin’s shoulder soundly, and Feng Xin makes an indignant noise, smacking him back. Mu Qing ignores him, too interested in Xie Lian’s current predicament. “His thoughts are public! Whatever he thinks, we can hear!”
Very good, Mu Qing! Xie Lian praises, clapping despite himself. So you understand? I just didn’t want you both to deal with this. It’s sort of annoying.
Rubbing his shoulder where it’s sore, Feng Xin frowns. “I don’t see how it’s any different than usual? You’re just not talking outloud, right?”
Right now, yes, when I’m focusing. But if I let my thoughts wander, it’s a lot. It would be like when I would come into the communication array in heaven to share recipes and tips before Ling Wen told me to stop doing it, but way worse. When I talk, I have a filter, just like anyone else. But that’s gone now.
“None of that is annoying, gege,” Hua Cheng assures from behind him. “That trash in heaven is just ungrateful.”
Mu Qing rolls his eyes so loudly the Heavens may very well have been alerted. Xie Lian, ignoring him, throws Hua Cheng an endeared smile over his shoulder.
“Listen,” he says, turning back to face Feng Xin and Mu Qing, “if you both feel comfortable spending time with me while I’m like this, then go ahead. I just don’t want to be difficult.”
“You’re difficult anyway,” Mu Qing drawls, and Xie Lian feels Hua Cheng’s killing aura ripple again. “How bad can it be? As long as you focus, it shouldn’t be a big deal.”
“Yeah, we don’t mind,” Feng Xin agrees. “If you’re fine with it, we are too.”
Xie Lian chews on his lip thoughtfully for a moment, straining so he doesn’t reveal—I was sort of excited to spend some time with San Lang. Ah! Despite not actually talking out loud, Xie Lian slaps his hands over his mouth, mortified. Sorry, sorry! See, this is exactly what I mean! Shit!
Mu Qing’s eyes roll again and Feng Xin cringes at the admission. Meanwhile, Xie Lian feels familiar arms wrap around his waist, and Hua Cheng chuckles in amusement.
“Gege, you make this one blush,” he teases, and Xie Lian huffs, weakly trying to squirm away.
“Fine. We’ll go then. Just let us know when you’re back to normal, will you?” Mu Qing says, already turning to leave.
“Wait, no! I may have thought that, but I didn’t say I want you both gone, did I?” Xie Lian calls, making Mu Qing pause. “While I’d love to spend more time with San Lang, I was also looking forward to seeing you two. We haven’t had time lately to sit and talk, so please stay. I’m sorry I was so rude just now.”
“That’s hardly your fault, gege,” Hua Cheng points out. “You’re allowed to think what you like. Especially if it’s things like that.”
“San Lang, please don’t tease…” Xie Lian complains, and Hua Cheng apologises by kissing his head.
“Crimson Rain is right,” Feng Xin says, though it sounds like it pains him to say it. “The—the first part of what he said, I mean! It’s fine, Your Highness, we don’t take offense. Right?” He nudges Mu Qing.
Mu Qing ens. “I suppose not. Fine then. Do you want to stay here or should we find someplace else?”
Judging by their somewhat uneasy postures, it seems like they both would prefer to get out of Ghost City as quickly as possible, but truthfully Xie Lian doesn’t think it wise to stray too far away from home while things are like this.
“Would you mind if I host here? I just don’t think anywhere else would be great right now. Mortals would probably freak out, and I don’t feel like dealing with all of Heaven intruding in on us out of curiosity.” Xie Lian laughs awkwardly at the thought. “We can stay here in Paradise Manor? San Lang and I have plenty of space to entertain you in.”
Slumping with subtle dismay, both Mu Qing and Feng Xin nod.
“Why don’t you go and try to enjoy yourself, gege, and I’ll check the library for any tell of such a curse? Maybe we can get rid of it faster rather than just letting it fade on its own,” Hua Cheng suggests, and Xie Lian feels a pang of disappointment.
I was hoping that… he starts to think, but cuts himself off. Hua Cheng raises his brow and Xie Lian clears his throat. “I was just going to say, I was hoping we could find something, yes. Thank you, San Lang, that’s very thoughtful of you.”
“You’re such a shit liar,” Mu Qing accuses. “You were hoping Crimson Rain would join us.”
Do you always have to point stuff like this out? Xie Lian huffs in his head and then throws his hands up in the air in frustration. “Sorry, Mu Qing. Sorry. Ah ahaha…”
Feng Xin snorts and just about steps out of the way of a lethal elbow aiming for his ribs.
“It’s fine,” Mu Qing manages through gritted teeth. He looks a bit pink. Whoops!
“If His Highness would prefer I come along, this one would be happy to do so,” Hua Cheng says and Xie Lian spots a certain sparkle to his eye. He’s loving this! How unfair.
Still, Xie Lian shakes his head. “No, no, it’s fine, sorry. Please, go ahead. I’ll come find you later, alright?”
“En, if gege so wishes,” Hua Cheng agrees easily and pecks the corner of Xie Lian’s mouth. “If these idiots give you any trouble, let me know.”
“Ha ha, I’m sure it’ll be fine, but thank you, San Lang.”
Hua Cheng maintains his fond smile until he redirects his gaze to Feng Xin and Mu Qing. “Don’t make gege feel bad for what’s going on. Understood?”
“Why would we?”
“Whatever.”
His gaze is cold as he passes them, but it softens once more as he catches Xie Lian’s eye on his way out. “I’ll see you later, gege.”
“Later, San Lang,” Xie Lian calls with a smile of his own, and then Hua Cheng’s gone. Xie Lian deflates with a sigh. “Right. Are you two hungry?”
After being assured that he wouldn’t be the one cooking, Xie Lian leads the two of them to a room with a low table and cushions. Tea is brought to them and Xie Lian pours it into cups, blowing over the rim of his own once he sits back to take a sip.
“So, how have the both of you been? Quite busy, I assume?”
“Mn,” Mu Qing says and places his tea down. “With that new god that ascended last month, the heavens have had to shuffle around a bit. And then a week ago, I had to go and assist him on his first mission.”
“Ah, how did that go? Is he nice?” Xie Lian asks, moving things around on the low table so that room can be made for the food that is being brought their way.
“He’s a nuisance,” Mu Qing says bluntly.
“You can’t just say that! Like you were much better when you first ascended!” Feng Xin gripes, dragging a plate closer to him to stuff his mouth.
Raising a fine brow, Mu Qing shoots back, “Oh? If I recall correctly, I ascended before you. You wouldn’t know anything about all that.”
“Everyone is a bit of a nuisance when they first ascend!” Feng Xin insists.
“Mn? Even Xie Lian?” Mu Qing tips his head toward Xie Lian, who only sighs and smiles awkwardly at the pretty women serving them, feeling quite sorry that they had to walk in on the two of them bickering.
Before Feng Xin can find something to retort with, Xie Lian gently intervenes. “Is he a martial god? I can’t quite remember.”
“No,” Mu Qing says, plucking up his own chopsticks to eat with. “Another civil sort, but he needed a martial god’s assistance with the mission, and seeing as our palaces are situated opposite each other, Ling Wen suggested I babysit.”
“That just means you’re capable!” Xie Lian tells him cheerily.
Mu Qing rolls his eyes. “Obviously I am.”
“I think he’s alright,” Feng Xin says after swallowing a mouthful. “That new god,” he clarifies when Mu Qing narrows his eyes at him.
“You didn’t have to say it like that,” Mu Qing huffs.
“Like what! You gave me a funny look! Fuck me, there’s always an issue with you.”
“There really isn’t. But since we’re on the topic—”
That didn’t last very long, Xie Lian sighs in his head almost fondly after watching them go back and forth a few lines each. Then there’s a sudden silence that makes him look up from his own meal, confused. Ah, my thoughts! he realises again, noticing the odd looks on both Mu Qing and Feng Xin’s faces.
“It’s fine, Your Highness,” Feng Xin quickly assures. “Sorry, we got carried away.”
Mu Qing doesn’t say anything, just rolls his eyes again. Xie Lian scratches his cheek, a little embarrassed.
“Sorry, sorry. I hope I didn’t ruin your flow?” he jokes lightly.
“Did you tell him about the temple mishap,” Mu Qing changes the subject, glancing at Feng Xin.
“Oh, no I didn’t. Your Highness, listen to this,” Feng Xin starts and Xie Lian nods, leaning forward to do so.
And he does listen! He really does! After being alive for so long, he can really balance himself out quite well, do several things at once, be it with body or mind. So as Feng Xin talks, a part of him tunes in and reacts politely. Then another part of him mumbles in the back of his mind, never one to really sit and stick to one task at a time.
I wonder what San Lang is doing right now, he thinks absently, herding some of his rice to one side of his dish.
Feng Xin cuts off abruptly, blinking.
Xie Lian notices right away. “Hm? What’s wrong?”
“N-nothing,” Feng Xin says quickly, and then kicks out his leg when Mu Qing snickers.
“Hey!” Mu Qing yells.
“Please keep the physical violence to a minimum while we eat…” Xie Lian pleads.
“Sorry, Your Highness,” Feng Xin says, for perhaps the hundredth time already today. “Anyway, as I was saying…” Xie Lian nods along again, listening.
I hope he’s not standing and reading again. He’ll hurt his neck like that! Maybe I should look for something to encourage him to sit when he’s there, he gets so distracted… Xie Lian’s train of thought resumes, too. Honestly, it’s really cute how absorbed he gets, but he doesn’t take good enough care of himself. What a hypocrite! Like he doesn’t spend all day every day fussing over me.
A strained cough.
Xie Lian’s brows furrow. Feng Xin has stopped again.
“Is everything alright?”
“You know, you really can just tell us to leave if that’s what you want,” Mu Qing says dryly.
“What?!” Xie Lian bursts out. “What gives you that impression?”
“You keep…” Another cough from Feng Xin, obviously forced.
“I keep what?” Xie Lian asks.
“Heavens above, you’re useless.” Mu Qing throws his hands up in the air, almost amazed. “Maybe if your San Lang hurts his poor neck you’ll have to kiss it better?”
Xie Lian’s face brightens in an instant. “Oh goodness,” he manages, embarrassed. “Ah… Aha… Ha ha ha ha… I’m… so sorry. I keep…”
“Forgetting?” Mu Qing crosses his arms over his chest. “If I were you, I wouldn’t be able to think about anything else but the fact that everyone is aware of what’s going through my head.”
“Makes me wonder, would that make interacting with you better or worse?” Feng Xin muses rather genuinely.
“What I do know for sure is you would be infinitely more insufferable in that situation yourself,” Mu Qing fires back.
Don’t these arguments get predictable after eight hundred years…
“Kinda,” Feng Xin says at the same time as Mu Qing agrees, “Very.”
They all blink at each other, because the exchange is a little ridiculous, and then Xie Lian bursts out laughing. It never takes much to set Feng Xin off, too, so he joins in quite quickly, leaving Mu Qing to stifle his own laughter by trying to bite down on his lip. It’s so silly!
This is so nice, Xie Lian thinks, forgetting his circumstances again. Oh, how I love them.
The laughter subsides, and Xie Lian feels two pairs of intense eyes on him. Wiping away his tears, he beholds them both. Feng Xin's expression is warm, if a little awkward, relaxed in a way that’s rare. Mu Qing, however, is flushed a light pink, looking embarrassed more than anything. This time when Xie Lian realises what he revealed to them, he doesn’t feel bad at all.
Instead he says, “I really should tell you guys that more often.”
“There’s no need,” Mu Qing mumbles, averting his gaze.
“His Highness shows it enough through his actions,” Feng Xin agrees, swirling his tea in its cup just to do something with his hands.
Still, Xie Lian shakes his head. “Doesn’t matter. It’s my choice. I’ll remind you both as much as I can.”
“Wouldn’t that just be overdoing it then?” Mu Qing says.
Xie Lian’s eyes turn into crescents. “There’s no such thing, Mu Qing.”
“Hmph.”
They finish eating in a comfortable silence, and as they do Xie Lian’s mind trails back to Hua Cheng again and again and again. The more he tries to focus on thinking about something other than his husband, the more he fails to do so. He keeps fussing about what Hua Cheng is doing, thinking about if he asked for tea to be brought while he works or if Xie Lian should take some back with him later, curious to know what little tangents his husband will have picked up on his reading to tell Xie Lian about. How wonderful is it to be married to someone you could spend the rest of time in conversation with? There’s no chance of ever getting bored, of ever running out of something interesting to say. Xie Lian is so incredibly fortunate.
Through gritted teeth, Mu Qing says quietly, as though meaning it only for himself, “At least it’s nothing lewd.”
“Ah?” Xie Lian overhears anyway because Mu Qing wasn’t really quiet enough.
Feng Xin whacks Mu Qing in the arm. “Are you crazy?!” he yells, gaping. “Don’t fucking say that! What filth! Fuck me!”
“You’re gonna tell me I’m wrong?” Mu Qing challenges. And, well… Not really.
But if keeping his thoughts about Hua Cheng in general at bay was hard, now that Mu Qing has mentioned it, other kinds of thoughts are now bursting to pop out. Xie Lian thinks he might die from embarrassment if that happens, which would make Hua Cheng very upset, so he swallows thickly.
“Um,” he says, smiling sheepishly.
His friends stare at him, mortified.
“Now you’ve fucking done it!” Feng Xin admonishes.
“How is it my fault that he’s so weak-willed that an offhand comment like that gets him all—” Mu Qing can’t even finish his sentence, face burning.
“Guys… Please… Save me some face, will you…” Xie Lian buries his face in his hands.
“Are you really fucking serious?!” Mu Qing says, disbelieving.
“L-listen, if either of you ever get married, you’ll understand!” Xie Lian hastens to defend himself. It sounds a lot like when parents shake their heads lovingly at their small children and ruffle their hair before saying You’ll understand when you’re older. Except Xie Lian is their friend, a scarce few months older than them himself, and he’s talking to two martial gods who have seen more than eight centuries pass, one of which actually has a son somewhere, and the other who is bound by vows. So maybe they won’t understand!
Groaning, Mu Qing drains his tea and rises to his feet. “I’m leaving. There’s no way I’m risking overhearing something about… that.”
Xie Lian can’t even really argue to make him stay. “Alright… Sorry to make things awkward.”
Feng Xin gets up too. “Your Highness, please don’t apologise. It really isn’t your fault. Honestly, if Mu Qing hadn’t said anything—”
“Will you shut it? I’d rather he had heard that and we have this weird exchange than have him get to that point naturally and we become privy to things neither of us would ever want to know!” Mu Qing points out, and Xie Lian very much agrees.
“Will you let me see you off?” Xie Lian says, joining them. “I promise I’ll behave. I’ll just have to recite Dao De Jing quietly, if you don’t mind.”
The pair give their assent, but it looks like Mu Qing is massaging an oncoming headache as they walk. Ah well…
“I’m sure you’ll be back to normal soon, Your Highness,” Feng Xin says.
“Mn, San Lang will find something, I’m sure.”
“If that husband of yours comes up empty though and it’s still not resolved in a few days, you better reach out to Ling Wen or I’ll drag you up to her myself,” Mu Qing grumbles.
This time Xie Lian is fully aware as he thinks with a smile, It’s so very funny when Mu Qing hides his concern behind well-meaning threats.
Caught and perhaps a little humiliated, Mu Qing stops dead in his tracks, fists clenched. “Bye,” he says stiffly and suddenly. And then he’s gone!
“What a fucking coward,” Feng Xin complains. “Always the first to go.”
“Don’t let him hear you say that,” Xie Lian chides, patting his shoulder. “I’ll see you both soon, alright? Reach out every couple of days. It’s nice to know what you’re up to.”
“Of course, Your Highness,” Feng Xin says, and just about catches himself before he can fully commit to bowing his head respectfully.
Xie Lian beams and pulls him into a hug. “A shame Mu Qing ran off so quickly. I would have liked a hug from him, too.”
“I’ll be sure to pass on the message,” Feng Xin promises.
“He may come straight back down and hit me upside the head for it,” Xie Lian jokes, giving Feng Xin a light squeeze. “Thanks for sticking around even though the situation’s a bit odd.”
With a final goodbye, Feng Xin leaves, too. Xie Lian sighs in massive relief. Right! Time to find San Lang. With a noticeable bounce to his step, Xie Lian goes on his way. He tries to keep his thoughts normal and quiet as he goes, but after a few turns and corridors, he realises that Paradise Manor is significantly less busy compared to usual. It’s not exactly bustling on a regular day, but Xie Lian does often come across a servant or at times Yin Yu, at the very least nodding with a smile as they pass by, if not sometimes stopping for a quick chat. But now, the manor is practically empty.
San Lang… Xie Lian thinks, cheeks rosy. Did you really kick everyone out just so I wouldn’t feel embarrassed…
Such a sweet and considerate husband he has! Xie Lian feels his heart melt in his chest. Really, Hua Cheng’s thoughtfulness will never get old. After so many centuries without anyone, not even himself, looking out for him, even small things like this really get to him. Xie Lian rubs his hot face, unable to school his big grin. Love really makes you super crazy, huh?
By the time he reaches the library, he’s giddy. It probably hasn’t been more than an hour since they parted ways, but Xie Lian still feels a thrill run through him, excited to see his husband again.
“San Lang? Are you still here?” Xie Lian calls out into the labyrinth of shelves, walking in.
“Right here, gege,” Hua Cheng’s voice comes from his left. When Xie Lian turns, he sees him coming over, smiling. “You’re here sooner than I expected. Did those two say something?”
“Haha, no, don’t worry, I just sent them on their way. It was quite impossible to do much while I’m like this,” Xie Lian explains.
Hua Cheng’s brows furrow. “It’s not gege's fault that the trash can’t handle some honesty. Gege is too kind to them.” He opens his arms up for Xie Lian to fall into once they’re close enough, and Xie Lian does so with ease, sighing happily.
San Lang smells so nice… Xie Lian thinks distractingly only to jolt with remembrance. He feels Hua Cheng squeeze him, smiling into the crown of his hair. With an awkward and forced cough, Xie Lian pleads, “Please ignore that…”
“Ah, but gege, how could I? I treasure all that you think and say. I could not call myself your most devoted believer otherwise.”
Shaking his head into Hua Cheng’s chest, Xie Lian bemoans, “So insincere… This is exactly why I had to leave early!”
Amusement is thick in Hua Cheng’s voice. “Because gege kept thinking about how nice I smell?”
“San Lang!” Xie Lian exclaims, thoroughly embarrassed. Like before, he tries to squirm away from Hua Cheng’s tender hold but it’s obvious he’s not really trying. “Don’t say such silly things! That’s a bit…"
“Pray gege forgives this bold follower,” he placates with a kiss to his hair. “My husband is just so easy to tease.”
“Mn, I’m sure,” Xie Lian sniffs, but he’s smiling himself. “What I meant was… Ah, well, my thoughts just kept drifting to San Lang, no matter what Feng Xin and Mu Qing were saying. It was… quite embarrassing honestly. Not! Not that I’m embarrassed to be thinking about San Lang, just that—well, my thoughts are meant to be private, and—” With a defeated sigh, Xie Lian gives up. San Lang knows what I mean…
Stroking Xie Lian’s hair gently, Hua Cheng hums in the back of his throat. “This one understands, gege, don’t worry. I am… incredibly honoured that gege thinks of me so often.”
“San Lang is all I think about,” Xie Lian admits more freely than he probably would otherwise, because if he doesn’t say it outright, he’ll only expose himself soon enough by proving as such. “I… hope that doesn’t make San Lang uncomfortable.”
“Uncomfortable?” Hua Cheng actually laughs. “Gege, you can’t have forgotten the several thousand statues I made of you by hand? There is nothing gege could possibly do to ever make me uncomfortable,” he vows and Xie Lian’s ears redden.
“Ah, if San Lang says so… Ahem, a-anyway, did you find anything about the curse?” He tips his head back to look at him.
Hua Cheng shakes his head. “Nothing specific. However, since gege only got hit by some dispersing energy of the spirit, apparently it shouldn’t cling to you for longer than a day or so. This will pass soon, gege, don’t worry.”
Xie Lian slumps with his sigh. “Thank goodness, I wasn’t sure how much longer I could go on like this.” It’s truly the most embarrassing thing to happen to me in a while…
“There’s nothing embarrassing about gege,” Hua Cheng insists. “I know you sent the trash back up to Heaven, but I hope gege doesn’t feel the need to send his husband away either. But if he does, I will, of course, go.”
“Don’t be silly, San Lang. You’re the only person I could ever be happy to stay with while being like this. I’m just grateful for your patience.”
Hua Cheng smiles easily, gently thumbing away an eyelash from Xie Lian’s cheek. “Gege honours this one with his trust. This believer is glad to serve.”
So silly… Xie Lian thinks fondly.
“Is that so? Does Dianxia find my devotion amusing?” Hua Cheng teases.
“San Lang,” Xie Lian chides with a soft sigh.
“Yes, gege?”
Please just kiss me.
Hua Cheng blinks a few times, as though surprised. Xie Lian finds it quite funny considering it’s far from the first time Xie Lian has asked for such affection, with his words or his body. Perhaps hearing him think that, though, feels different for him. For Xie Lian, it hardly makes a difference, because there’s rarely ever a time where he doesn’t want to kiss Hua Cheng.
“Of course, gege,” he says quietly and leans in once Xie Lian has risen on his tiptoes to accept.
So soft, Xie Lian’s thoughts run rampant like this. This always feels so good, San Lang’s such a good kisser, god, I love him! So nice, really nice, ah…
He pulls away, bright in the face and flustered. He avoids Hua Cheng’s eye entirely.
“Gege…” Hua Cheng breathes.
“Sorry,” Xie Lian apologises quickly. “Maybe we should hold off until I’m back to nor—”
Hua Cheng captures him in a kiss again, a little less chaste this time.
Oh wow! Xie Lian thinks excitedly, feeling his stomach flip like crazy with butterflies. Oh wow, oh wow, is he—San Lang! Oh wow! He feels Hua Cheng smile against his lips, and the faint rumble of his laughter where he rests his hands against his chest. He’s really enjoying this far too much! San Lang! San Lang, you’re so mean to this hus—oh wow…
They kiss like this and worse all the time, by now more than a little familiar with the shape of each other’s mouths, but it feels a little more exciting now that they’re both so aware of what Xie Lian is thinking the entire time. Xie Lian just feels bad that it’s nothing sexier than a few awed oh wow s, but it’s clear that Hua Cheng’s not all that picky. In fact, Hua Cheng is almost a bit too into it, and Xie Lian feels himself being backed carefully into a bookshelf, Hua Cheng’s hands roaming. Xie Lian’s follow them around, commenting openly about how nice it feels when Hua Cheng squeezes, or how good it is when he angles his head a certain way, not to mention how hot Hua Cheng is when he does all that with his tongue, all of which is punctuated by even more streams of oh wow s that shockingly do not ruin the mood.
Parting to let Xie Lian breathe, Hua Cheng moves down to his neck, smearing open-mouthed kisses onto the faintly bruised skin there. Xie Lian’s breath shudders and he tips his head back, fingers easily finding purchase in Hua Cheng’s wild hair and keeping him there. So good, San Lang, ah, sore, sore—no, it’s good! Oh wow! His eyes flutter shut and he lets his thoughts spill out of him, momentarily too occupied by Hua Cheng’s closeness to feel flustered or embarrassed. But then realisation hits: Oh no, we’re in the library!
Hua Cheng groans into the crook of Xie Lian’s neck, as though hoping Xie Lian wouldn’t catch onto the fact, and pulls away when he feels his husband gently ask him to step back. “Gege, it’s fine, we own everything here,” he assures, voice rough from kissing.
San Lang’s lips look so red, Xie Lian thinks woozily and then cringes, covering his face with his hands.
Hua Cheng makes a choked noise and works to pry Xie Lian’s hands away. “Gege, please, do you have any idea what you’re doing to me?”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry!” Xie Lian squeaks out, face hotter than it’s ever been, he’s sure. “Don’t change the subject though! We can’t—do things here!”
“Whyever not, gege? There’s plenty of room.” Hua Cheng manages to find room to kiss Xie Lian’s nose bridge clumsily. “Do you know how many bookshelves we have? How sturdy they all are? Not to mention the desks.”
“San Lang!” Xie Lian complains, his blush extending down to his neck, quite likely his chest, too. “You can’t just—don’t say such things!”
“Does gege not like the idea? I’m open to suggestions,” Hua Cheng teases, attacking the weak spots of Xie Lian’s defenses with kisses.
Who said I’m opposed?! Wait, no! No, no! Ah, please, mercy, mercy! San— “—Lang! You’re being cruel!” Xie Lian finally lets go of his face and plants his hands on Hua Cheng’s shoulders, breathing in and out a little heavily. This is getting incredibly embarrassing! “Stop laughing! Stop laughing! No more kisses! Enough! Too spoiled!”
Hua Cheng, despite Xie Lian’s begging, keeps laughing and laughing, and Xie Lian can’t help it: San Lang has such a nice laugh.
That shuts him up! Aha!
Xie Lian blinks at him, thrown off by how instantaneous Hua Cheng’s quiet was. Looking up at him, there’s the faintest tinge of pink to his cheeks, brighter on his pointed eartips.
With a big, giddy smile, Xie Lian asks, “Ah, is my dear husband bothered by my honest thoughts?”
“G-gege, you don’t have to—” Hua Cheng starts, but Xie Lian’s loud thoughts take over.
San Lang looks so cute when he’s being teased! Makes me feel really happy! He keeps looking away when it happens, but I love seeing his face turn redder and redder! And his smile is so sweet when he’s trying to escape his gege’s clutches, I thought he wanted kisses? Hm? Does my pretty San Lang not want kisses? What happened to my lovely San Lang’s appetite? Did he—
Hua Cheng seizes Xie Lian’s arms, looking truly flustered. “Your Highness, please,” he says, sounding strained. “Really, there’s—there’s no need to indulge me.”
Xie Lian cuts off, not expecting such a serious tone shift. “San Lang? I’m sorry, did I upset you? I’ll stop if you don’t like it,” he promises, his own hands covering Hua Cheng’s gently.
Shaking his head vehemently, Hua Cheng pledges, “His Highness could never upset this San Lang. You just… I appreciate His Highness' kind words, but he need not force himself.”
Force myself?! Oh, San Lang, do you think— “—I’m lying? San Lang. San Lang, please look at me.”
With only a moment of hesitation, Hua Cheng does so, but it’s clear he feels guilty by how hooded his one eye is. Xie Lian’s hands travel to cup his husband’s face, stroking his thumbs over his cheekbones. He rises to press a sweet kiss to his lips, smiling kindly.
“San Lang, let’s go back to our room so we can talk, alright?”
Hua Cheng nods stiffly and retrieves his dice from his pocket. With an easy roll, they end up back where they started their morning, and Xie Lian falls back onto the bed, bringing his husband down with him. The familiar, heavy weight of Hua Cheng on top of him feels nice, and he arranges them so Hua Cheng’s ear is settled over Xie Lian’s heartbeat, just how they both like it.
Soothing him with some gentle strokes through his hair, Xie Lian says, “Does my husband truly believe I would have to pretend I feel and think those things about him?”
Hua Cheng doesn’t respond right away. It’s not the most comfortable conversation to have, and they’ve had similar ones in the past before, but the combined steady beat of Xie Lian’s heart and the rhythmic petting through his hair allows Hua Cheng to release some tension in his body.
Into Xie Lian’s chest, Hua Cheng confesses, “This one finds it hard to believe his god could look at him and think such thoughts without really trying.”
“Well, this god has no reason to not think such thoughts, especially when they’re true. I wasn’t lying when I told San Lang he’s all I think about,” Xie Lian explains gently, scratching a spot behind Hua Cheng’s ear that he knows is particularly sensitive. He’s rewarded by a few shy ear flicks that make him smile. “When I was with Feng Xin and Mu Qing, they were getting really quite fed up with my thoughts drifting to you all the time. No matter what they were saying, I just couldn’t help but wonder what you were doing. What is it that San Lang said once? Separation is separation, right? Honestly, after I thought it would be just you and me today, I really couldn’t get you off my mind, a bit more than usual.”
Burrowing his face into Xie Lian’s chest, Hua Cheng mumbles, “Gege…” all embarrassed, like he doesn’t know what to say. But that’s okay! Because Xie Lian has an idea as to what he can say instead.
“San Lang, would you let your gege show you something? But you’ll have to let me know if you want to stop at any point. I don’t want to push you.”
“En,” Hua Cheng allows. “His Highness can do as he wishes.”
“Thank you,” Xie Lian says with a smile. “Are you ready?” Another en. “Alright, then listen carefully!”
Can San Lang hear me still? A nod. Good, good. I’m just going to let my mind wander, alright? I swear to you whatever I think from now are thoughts that come to me naturally. I’m not focusing on them or trying to filter anything, alright? Another nod. Right, ahem… Hm, isn’t it a bit silly to clear my throat in my head? Ah, but I do it quite a lot actually, so maybe it’s not that silly, it’s more just I’m not used to anyone else knowing I do it… It’s so nice to lie down like this… We do it so often, but it really is so comfortable… San Lang is the perfect weight, not too heavy but not too light… It’s so easy to start to feel sleepy like this…
As though to demonstrate, Xie Lian yawns without meaning to. He feels Hua Cheng huff a small laugh rather than hear it.
Ah, how rude, how rude, sorry… I just really feel so at ease like this. I remember my heart used to beat like crazy when San Lang used to listen to it like this at first. How embarrassing! I just felt so flustered to have him close for a while, and even though I still feel that way a lot, I’ve gotten better at not showing it… Ah, but now saying that, I can feel my heart racing again! Guess I jinxed myself, ha ha ha… Mm, I wonder what we’ll have for dinner… Maybe I’ll cook? Ah, what if we prepared dumplings together? It’s always so fun when San Lang helps, even if he does distract me all the time. I think the food somehow tastes better, too, when we work together, but maybe that’s just my imagination… I hope San Lang feels the same way.
A quiet, confirming, “En,” that almost spooks Xie Lian.
Feeling his heart jump to show it, Xie Lian laughs both out loud and in his head. I forgot San Lang was listening! I sort of forgot what I was thinking about just now, too. Hopefully nothing all that ridiculous. Honestly, I’m super lucky San Lang can’t hear my thoughts all the time, I think he would tease me to death! And I would let him, because he looks so smug and cute when he does it, very happy, too. Happiness looks so good on his handsome face. I’m… hm… I’m kind of glad I’m the only one who gets to see that side of San Lang… Ha ha, that sounds kind of greedy, right? But I don’t think I care… If I can let myself be selfish about one thing, let it be my San Lang. My San Lang, mine, mine, mine, ha ha ha!
“Your Highness…” Hua Cheng manages hoarsely, fidgeting a little.
I don’t mind when he calls me that sometimes, but there are moments where I can tell he does it purposefully instead of using ‘gege’... Like he doesn’t think he’s allowed to refer to me in such a familiar way right then…
Hua Cheng turns his face so his forehead rests against Xie Lian’s breastbone. “Sorry, gege… I suppose I do…”
It’s alright, San Lang doesn’t have to apologise. I sort of understand it. I just hope that the more time we spend together, he’ll feel less and less obliged to do it. I like ‘gege’ best of all, I think. I remember it sort of took my breath away when I first heard you say it! No one had ever really called me that before, no one constant in my life anyway… It made me… really happy. Still does.
“Gege deserves only happiness,” Hua Cheng promises quietly and Xie Lian feels himself smile.
So does my San Lang. Could I please have him look at me?
Less hesitation this time than at the library. Hua Cheng shifts so he’s looking up at him, his eye searching his face. Xie Lian’s smile grows.
Ah, there he is. My beautiful husband.
“Gege—” Hua Cheng begins to whine.
Xie Lian silences him gently with a kiss to his brow. None of that. Be good, won’t you? Let me look at you. Hua Cheng swallows but settles. So good, San Lang. So handsome. I could look at San Lang’s face forever. There’s always something there for me to admire and gush about. Like his brows. Hua Cheng makes a funny, confused noise, paired with a crinkle of his eye, the small push of said brows. Xie Lian laughs quietly. So expressive! Well groomed and strong. Sometimes San Lang raises one of them and gives me a silly look, and it’s really quite charming! Ah, and then San Lang’s nose. So lovely and pronounced. It's a lot of fun when I get to see him scrunch it up, like when we have flour fights in the kitchen. He has such long eyelashes as well. It’s not very often I get the chance to wake up before San Lang, but when I do, I stare at his lashes. They’re really beautiful…
It goes on like this for a while, with Xie Lian babbling and rambling aimlessly about Hua Cheng’s features for god knows how long. He pets and strokes and soothes his husband all the while, getting really excited at certain points, not all that different from the times he’ll get a little ahead of himself when talking about swords and weapons. Hua Cheng squirms at times, not quite uncomfortable but maybe a little overwhelmed. Still, he doesn’t ask Xie Lian to stop, though Xie Lian does slow down a little when he mentions how capturing he finds Hua Cheng’s sunken eye, how while Hua Cheng fears it horrifies his features, Xie Lian himself really adores it.
It means so much to me that you’re becoming comfortable showing me things like that, Xie Lian thinks lovingly. More than I could ever put into words. Sometimes, mornings where we lay together are my favourites because San Lang still hasn’t put his eyepatch on and he looks sleepy and content. It makes me dizzy with happiness just thinking about it. I think sometimes, I love San Lang so much it hurts.
Hua Cheng’s throat makes a noise, a little distraught and confused, his eye narrowing with concern.
Xie Lian laughs breathlessly. A good hurt. Does… San Lang know what I mean? Sort of like… Sort of as if all the love I have inside of me for San Lang is trying to burst out of my chest. I swear sometimes I can hear my ribcage creak with it. I like that feeling a lot. I… I like how my love for San Lang feels. How it honestly consumes me…
“No more,” Hua Cheng’s voice is raw and quiet, “no more, please.”
“Okay,” Xie Lian says, just as quiet. “I’m sorry if that was too much for you.”
Hua Cheng’s eye squeezes shut and he shakes his head into Xie Lian’s chest. “No. I just… Gege makes me so happy.”
Xie Lian softens. “Oh, San Lang. You make me just as happy.”
They stay like this for a while, Xie Lian’s hand drifting to gently rake his fingers up and down Hua Cheng’s back over his robes. He focuses on their joint breathing to try and dispel any further thoughts, not wanting to overwhelm his husband. Hua Cheng doesn’t always breathe, and it’s even rarer for his heart to beat, but sometimes when they’re laid together like this, he’ll let his body echo Xie Lian’s. Having once been asked if he does it on purpose, Hua Cheng couldn’t really give a straight answer, like he wasn’t so certain himself. Something about Xie Lian encouraging more human behaviours within him. Bringing him back to life by just existing. Xie Lian couldn’t tell if he was just being poetic to make him blush, but whenever they share lulls like this, he hopes it’s even half-true.
“Gege,” Hua Cheng breaks the silence after a while, voice still soft.
Eyes closed, Xie Lian hums, “Mn?”
“Thank you.” He feels Hua Cheng press his lips over Xie Lian’s beating heart. “I really… What you were… thinking… ” he struggles.
Xie Lian cracks an eye open, watching the way his husband’s face is twisted in an endearing but complicated way. “San Lang can always ask me what I’m thinking,” he says and strokes back some of Hua Cheng’s hair from his face. “Now that he’s heard what my thoughts sound like, I’m happy to remind you just how often I think stuff like that.”
“Gege doesn’t have to.”
“Mn. Just like San Lang didn’t have to keep Paradise Manor empty for me to think freely today.”
Caught, Hua Cheng rubs his cheek into Xie Lian’s chest. “Gege noticed,” he says, a hint of a smile on his face. “This one likes looking out for his beloved.”
“Just as this one enjoys telling his own beloved just how much he adores him.”
“... I understand, Your Highness. Gege,” he amends.
“Good.”
Eventually, they get up to prepare for bed, having somehow lazed the rest of the day away. They take turns washing each other, and Xie Lian fails to keep his thoughts entirely clean as he beholds Hua Cheng’s fine body. Thankfully, Hua Cheng has no complaints and things get a little messy, so it’s a good thing they’re already in the bath. Once Xie Lian is pink all over for more reasons than one, they dress each other in their sleep robes and trail back to bed, assuming a similar position to the one before. In no time they’re both comfortable and slowly getting sleepy. Soon enough they’re both thinking out loud rather than speaking, Xie Lian using the curse to his advantage to reply to Hua Cheng’s words echoing in his ears via the private communication array. Xie Lian isn’t sure which of them falls asleep first if not at the same time, but he’s vaguely aware that his thoughts are of his husband until he’s out like a light.
When he rouses in the morning, Hua Cheng is already awake and watching him with love in his gaze. Xie Lian smiles sleepily and plants a clumsy kiss to his chin, failing to find his lips.
“Morning, San Lang,” he mumbles.
“Good morning, gege,” Hua Cheng’s sleep-thick voice greets. “What’s on gege’s mind this morning?”
Xie Lian smiles. “Only how much I love San Lang.”
“What a coincidence,” Hua Cheng says, drawing him even closer to kiss Xie Lian’s brow. “I was just thinking the very same about gege.”