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“It’s lame, I know,” Gold yanked the book out of Silver’s grasp, he slammed it shut, shoving it into his closet. Before he could shut the door, Silver noticed the various matching books all stacked up on top of each other.
Not knowing what to say, Silver shook his head, this was most certainly an example of something normal people would be more accustomed to, he understood the basic idea but it wasn’t something he’d ever search out. But it also wasn’t something that he’d consider embarrassing, Gold’s reaction was over the top, but then again, it was Gold after all.
A blush dusted Gold’s cheeks, he looked down, unable to make eye contact with the redhead, “it’s just something me and my mom do together, okay? She just wants an excuse to hang out, please…please don’t tell anyone,”
Again, Silver wasn’t sure what to say, he shrugged, but Gold didn’t seem done, feeling the urge to justify his hobby,
“Mom insisted on it, after my pops died, said it was a way to preserve memories, I was like 7 so I just went on with it, I know it’s not manly. Scrapbooking is something little old ladies and housewives do. You know how my mom is, just forget you ever saw it,” Gold grew more animated the more he spoke, his arms waving around wildly.
Silver silently nodded, Gold’s reaction seemed excessive, but it was Gold. Silver knew his best friend well enough to understand his incessant need to seem macho, it was just another quirk about the black haired boy.
True to his word, Silver didn’t ask about the scrapbooking, he didn’t bring it up to Gold’s mom, he let Gold off the hook.
At least until he was at the house alone. It was still strange, being alone in a home, with no ill intent at least. But Silver felt perfectly at ease, safe, content, wanted, if only he could get over his stupid crush then he’d be in heaven.
Gold was working late at the daycare, his mother was off at the bingo hall. Silver chuckled to himself, the pair were so similar, both loved Pokemon more than they did most people, both were slight gambling addicts, both were more than likely to cheat at gambling.
Honestly it was a good thing that all of the casinos, bingo halls, game corner, and pool halls in the area were owned by Team Rocket. Otherwise they’d both be banned for life.
Giovanni had apparently given the pair a free pass to play, and instructed all of his grunts to let them be. He was rather taken with both of them, thankful that they opened their home for his son. Even now, as Silver worked to build a relationship with the man, he constantly expressed his gratitude towards the pair. It was something they agreed upon, Gold and his mom were rare, with hearts of… well, gold.
And as comfortable as Silver felt around the pair, he knew he was reaching the end of his tenure as their long term houseguest. He knew they would both be upset, but he couldn’t keep waking up in the same house as Gold, not platonically at least. His heart breaking knowing that Gold would probably be bringing home some girl soon, happily introducing her as his girlfriend.
It was for the best to start cutting ties, the closer Silver grew to his father, the less he worried about his previous moral compass. He knew he’d end up becoming the prince, and really the warm home full of love and happy Pokémon at Gold’s wasn’t that different from his father’s home. The man loved his son more than anything else, and Silver finally understood and accepted his love.
Glancing at the clock, he had a few hours before Gold was off work, and bingo went late on Tuesdays. He made his way into the living room, grabbing the remote off of the coffee table, he paused before turning on the television.
He was alone.
Gold wasn’t around. And he was curious about the scrapbooks hidden away in his closet, the single page he’d been allowed to view before Gold changed his mind had been cutesy, a few photos of a very young gold posing in a birthday hat with the house Pokémon, little doodles and stickers. Gold’s handwritten names and types listed. A quick sentence long description,
Gold’s 7th birthday
I received several new stuffies and a nice pool table, mama tried to make it happy since it was the first year without dad.
He wanted to see more, see what growing up normal was like. Experience a softer childhood through Gold’s curated memories.
Creeping up the stairs, Silver couldn’t help but already feeling guilty, he was breaking into Gold’s private things. Taking a look at memories that didn’t belong to him. Gold would be upset if he found out, angry, embarrassed, but he couldn’t help but sneak into Gold’s room.
Weavile climbed onto Gold’s bed, circling, then laying in the spot that he’d seen him curl up with Aibo in the past when the trainers would hang out playing video games or whatever else they got up to. A few of the house Pokémon followed Silver, curious of what he was getting into, but not overly worried. They trusted Silver, just like Gold’s team, never acting on edge or protective around him. Even going as far as to seek him out for pets or beg for treats.
Opening the closet, he was relieved to see that Gold hadn’t changed the hiding spot, he grabbed the first book he saw. Clutching it close to himself as he sank into Gold’s bed. He took a deep breath willing himself to change his mind, it wasn’t too late. He hadn’t opened it yet. He could still put it back, he could push the books from his mind.
His hands moved on their own, flipping the book open. Silver was greeted by a large photo of Gold’s team. It must have been taken after they fought the masked man, but before most of them evolved. Gold stood in the middle, his goggles hanging off of his head, leaning against his pool cue, he was caught mid laugh, his eyes squinting, pretty teeth out in the open. Silver loved his smile so much, he looked so beautiful when he smiled.
Under the photo was each of the names and types as well as the year of the photo. Silver smiled, his fingers lingering over his friend's young face, he already had a crush on him by that point.
Turning the page, a photo of himself glared back, his hair braided with silly little bows and ribbons. Looking now, he smiled despite himself. He’d been annoyed when he woke up to find Gold had messed with his hair, but now, he was glad Gold had gotten a photo. It was one of the first moments when Silver had realized he was comfortable in their home, comfortable enough to fall asleep without fear. His eyes traced the various stickers placed on the decorative paper, stamps with silly phrases danced along the page, underneath was the caption,
Gold does Silver’s hair.
He fell asleep and I decided to play with his hair, one thing led to another and I ended up doing this. His hair felt like silk between my fingers, and I only wished he would have slept just a bit longer so I could have played with it more.
Silver furrowed his brow with a frown as he read the caption a second time. A strange thing for Gold to write, he’d expected something stupid like, introducing Lady Silver .
He flipped over to the next page, a full spread, a pair of movie ticket stubs, some movie night themed paper, a photo that Silver remembered taking in line for the midnight premiere of the first proteam omega movie. He and Gold were standing next to each other, Gold wore an annoyed expression, which made sense seeing as he’d complained non stop about being dragged to see the film. Especially having to go to the midnight release. Silver’s own face was pleasant, almost blank, but he remembered how excited he’d actually been. And how much he enjoyed the movie, and the company. Gold had insisted on buying popcorn and Silver’s favorite candy, saying they were movie theater necessities.
The second photo was obviously stealthily taken in the theater, it was Silver’s profile, his eyes were wide, an almost childlike wonder as he stared up at the large screen. His mouth slightly opened as he intently watched.
The caption read,
Gold and Silver attend the midnight premiere of Proteam Omega
Tickets for Silver’s movie were sold out within thirty seconds of being available, and despite camping out on the website, I didn’t get them. Luckily I found a reseller, I paid a stupid amount but it was worth every penny. I wish I had gotten a photo of Silver’s face when I showed him. He never looked so beautiful. I couldn’t tell you what happened during the movie, as I spent every moment taking in all of Silver’s reactions, the smile he wore on the trip home is enough to keep me going on my darkest days.
He’d never known that Gold had purchased the tickets from a reseller, and especially not that he’d overpaid. And once again the caption didn’t match Silver’s expectations. It was almost as if they’d been on a date, or at least that’s what he would have thought had he been an outsider reading the page. As if that would ever happen, no matter how much he wanted it.
He shook his head, turning to the next page. Gold did always have trouble expressing his true feelings and appreciation. That's all this was, Gold attempting to express his happiness towards their friendship.
This page was not of Silver, the previous segments must have been a fluke, he doubted he’d see another photo in the bunch. The page in front of him was the daycare granny on her birthday, Silver skimmed the entry, but instead of his thoughts it just listed the date, occasion, and guests, he turned the page.
It was another themed page, the paper decorated with little whisks, bowls, batter, the photos were various candid shots of Silver in the kitchen either with Gold or his mother. There was one that caught his eye immediately, was one where he was midway through a laugh, his mouth open wide, leaning into Gold’s mother as her eyes seemed to twinkle, he looked so…normal, not his usual stiff and nervous self. It was a nice photo.
Mama teaches Silver how to chop
I can’t express my gratitude towards my mother for seeing Silver how I see him, for opening her heart for him, and for him letting her in.
The rest of the photos had similar captions, one of Gold wearing an apron, he’d managed to wrangle Silver into one as well. He remembered the day, Gold had demanded that Silver assist him with baking cookies for the dexholder meetup they were attending. It had been surprisingly fun, but again Gold was the reason,
Gold and Silver bake chocolate chip cookies
I know Silver never got to do the things as a kid I take for granted. like baking. I’m glad I get to be the one to share it with him. I’m the one that holds those special moments in my heart.
He flipped pages again, his stomach feeling strange, something bubbling up inside of him, a familiar longing, not for his childhood, but for Gold. If this was how he spoke of a friend, what would a romantic partner hear about themselves? It was easy to feel jealous over someone that wasn’t around yet.
A photo on Silver’s birthday as he blew out his candles, the first time he’d ever done it. Actually that wasn’t entirely true, he’d seen a photo of himself at a year old doing it, but still. His stupid party hat, that Gold had insisted on him wearing, hanging sideways on his head, sneasel peeking up over the table. His own mini hat placed on his head as the ice type watched the cake closely wishing for a piece to fall. Gold was behind Silver, looming down, staring with an unreadable expression.
Silver’s 12th birthday
The prior 9 birthdays weren’t given the treatment they deserved, so I’ve made it my goal to make up for all the bad years. He seemed to like the cake mama and I baked, and was extra surprised when I brought out a second set of gifts the next day for Christmas. I know the birthday boy is the one that makes the wish, but I placed a wish on that candle, that he and I would be together forever.
That was a totally normal thing to say about a best friend, especially in their line of work where survival wasn’t always guaranteed. No secondary meanings…
The page flipped,
Silver and sneasel, taken without his knowledge, doodles of sneasel making various expressions circled the photo, underneath,
Silver with Sneasel
I’m always in awe of their relationship, I’m glad they had each other, and I’m glad I can be there for them now.
Another flip. Aquatic stickers dotted the page; Silver in the water, gyarados nuzzling his face, kingdra eating a treat from his hand, feraligatr partially submerged, obviously enjoying the water time. Silver wore a content smile, tending to his aquatic team members, and Gold’s, as he could see Polibo creeping up on kingdra from behind, he remembered the pair immediately swimming off in a game of chase.
Silver with Gyarados, kingdra, gatr, and Polibo
Silver often pretends he’s super stoic and that he only sees his team as tools, but I know that’s not true. Silver adores his team, even if he doesn’t show it.
Page after page, caption after caption, thought after thought, there were occasional photos of the various dexholders, or stills of Golds mom, his team or the house Pokémon, but most photos in the book featured Silver.
It was getting harder to pretend that Gold was just sentimental. That this was a normal amount of photos of a friend in a book. Silver shook his head, pushing vain hope away. Maybe this was a friend book, or maybe Gold made themed books. And he just happened to grab the Silver book on the first try. He was sure that in the closet there would be a Crys book, a Red book, probably a book for each member of his team too.
Gently, Silver closed the book, setting it next to him on Gold’s bed. He was a bit curious about what Gold had written for their other friends. Although he almost didn’t want to look, if the other entries were more emotional and loving it could very well break his heart. How desperately he wanted Gold to see him as the love of his life.
With a heavy sigh, Silver stood up, quickly running his fingers through weavile’s fur smiling at his lifelong companion and the sweet pur he let out. After momentarily wrestling with his conscience, he selected another book at random, then another, and another. He looked at the remaining pile, he might as well go through all of them. He set the ones he had grabbed back on the stack, then grabbed the lot of them. Carefully walking them to the bed using his chin to keep them balanced, weavile gave him a look best described as judging before grooming himself.
He looked at the stack now resting next to him. The familiar guilt eating away at his core, he really shouldn’t be going through Gold’s personal things like this, yet, he couldn’t resist. He wanted to know all of his black haired friend’s thoughts, what he considered worthy of memorializing.
Making up his mind, Silver grabbed the top book. Opening it to the first page, he realized this was probably the first one Gold had ever made. The front page was a family portrait done in crayon, Gold’s young handwriting misspelling half of the house pokemon's names. It was easy to pick out the people even without Gold’s helpful labels. Gold with his wild hair, his mom with her long hair, and a stick figure man, he had a yellow circle, a halo probably, over his head.
The caption was difficult to read, between the spelling error, and Gold’s youthful torchic scratch; but Silver was pretty sure it said, daddy had to go to heaven, but he’s still watching us, I miss him a lot, so I’ll write all of the fun things we did so I can look at the pictures when I get sad.
Silver felt himself misting up, it was such a sweet sentiment, and also heartbreaking. His own childhood had been horrible, but he couldn’t imagine growing close to a parent only for them to be taken away by death. His own mother had died, but he didn’t remember her, he didn’t remember his father either, but now that he was getting to know the man, he really wasn’t sure if he could take him dying.
He flipped to the next page, this time it was a photo of Gold’s father holding a newborn Gold, he was grinning widely, eyes full of nervous wonder. Silver had seen the photo before, there was a copy of it framed and hanging in the hallway. The man looked so much like Gold does now, his hair was wild too, the only difference was the eyes, Gold had his mother’s eyes.
Me and daddy
Mama said daddy loved me a ton! I was a baby so I don’t remember but she said he liked to hold me a lot.
The next photo was Gold as a toddler sleeping on his father’s chest, the pair had matching expressions, mouth wide open, sprawled out, a baseball game on in the background. Silver smiled, touching the toddler’s face, Gold still slept like that. He was a wild sleeper, and a hard sleeper at that, the boy could sleep through anything.
Daddy and me napping
Mama took this picture, we fell asleep because the Goldenrod Tyranitars were losing!
Gold’s love for sports must have come from his father. He turned the page, Gold was around 6, Aibo hanging off of him, his father with his arm around him. They were in the stands of a baseball stadium, posed in front of the home plate. Both wore matching Goldenrod Tyranitar jerseys.
Me and daddy at a Tyranitar game
Daddy always took me to baseball games. The Tyranitars won that game! I’m going to miss these games the most.
Silver’s fingers ghosted over the caption, the words slightly smudged in obvious tear drops. Maybe it would be a nice surprise to get Gold tickets to the next Tyranitar game? He knew Gold watched the team even now, and he’d even gone with him to a game or two with Gold. But now Silver would know how important it was.
He continued his journey through Gold’s childhood, all the photos and corresponding entries were so sweet, if Silver were to bet, Gold still went back and looked through the book when he was feeling nostalgic. A strange comparison to his own troubled youth, but Silver felt nothing but warmth looking at the photos, there was no jealousy.
He came to the last page, he expected the same as what had been in the rest of the book. But instead of a cute photo of Gold and his father, there was a headstone. Gold’s father’s name, the dates he was alive, and the epithet, a loving husband, father, and friend to all . A tightness gripped Silver’s chest, why would Gold add such a macabre photo to his happy memories book? There were flowers laid out near the grave, then his eyes fell on the bottom portion of the photo. Silver sat in front of the grave, his back facing the camera, but it was him for sure, his long red hair unmistakeable.
This was a recent photo, he remembered going with Gold, it was maybe a year ago. Which meant Gold had come back as an adult to add the new entry.
Silver visiting Daddy
Hi daddy, I wanted you to meet Silver, he was really sweet, and even talked to you for a few minutes, promising you he’d always have my back. He’s really important to me. Mama says that you would have been accepting of me, but I don’t really know. I just hope you would have liked Silv. He doesn’t really like sports, but he cheers for me at my competitions, and he’ll begrudgingly sit through a Tyranitar’s game with me. His mom is gone too, if you run into her, please tell her I’ll always take care of him.
What would his father be accepting of? Was it Gold’s personality? Gold tried to play himself off as an asshole all the time, but stuff like this was proof he was a kind soul. Silver wiped the tears that had been forming in his eyes away. He closed the book with reverence, grabbing the next. Hopefully this one wouldn’t be as emotional, but he was glad he got to see some of Gold’s youth.
Involuntarily Silver barked out a laugh, on the page in front of him was the ugly faced wanted poster. Gold had doodled silly captions around it, totodile and cyndaquil stickers decorated the page,
Silver’s Wanted Poster
At first, I wanted to be the one to bring Silver to justice! Then we ended up becoming friends, now we’re best friends! He even stays with me and mama sometimes. For the record, he looks nothing like this, he’s actually really handsome. <3
Squinting, Silver attempted to figure out if there really was a small heart at the end of the caption, or if Gold had somehow smudged ink. It was probably ink… But, Gold thought he was handsome? That was new. He’d actually always kinda teased him, calling him fugly, but that was usually when he wanted to wrestle, taunting him to get a rise out of him.
Weavile stretched out, his claws hitting Silver’s thigh, he rolled his eyes, flipping the page with one hand and petting the ice type with the other. So spoiled.
The next page was a sketch that Silver had never seen, it was him at 11, totodile in front of him, he looked…well the exact opposite of what the wanted poster portrayed. Significantly cuter than he was in real life. The strangest bit of the page however was that there was no caption, and there were doodled hearts all over the page, some of them had G&S4eva inside.
Something turned in Silver’s stomach. It meant nothing, there’s no way that Gold had a crush on him. Gold was straight. Silver didn’t have a lot of friends. Really. it was just Crys and Gold, and Blue if big sisters could be counted as friends, so this was probably perfectly normal behavior for friends.
The following pages seemed to have a valentine’s day style romance theme. The pages were covered in hearts, chocolates, cartoony lips, but the photos were not of people. Each page was dedicated to one of Gold’s pokemon and one of Silver’s together.
Aibo and weavile had their own spread. Different time periods represented, as there were ones of them in their first evolutions. Silver laughed, showing weavile, the pokemon rubbing his head against the page with a pleased pur. They were sort of a couple, Aibo and weavile. When Silver did eventually move out, it would probably be hard on the pair, they tended to gravitate towards each other, cuddling and grooming each other constantly.
The next set was of Kingdra and Polibo, swimming together, playing together, then them with their eggs. The next few pages had a nursery theme to them, Kingdra and Polibo’s various offspring in their egg forms and then again as fresh horsea hatchlings. There were snaps of Gold and Silver posing proudly with the babies.
Again, the romantic theme picked back up, Exbo and gatr, Sunbo and Honchkrow in their various evolutions, Gyrados and Sudobo, Ursaring with Mantaro and the Remoraid that are always with Mantaro.
There was a family photo, pika, chuchu, and Pibu all posed together. Pika and Chuchu had their little paws on Pibu’s shoulder. It was cute, Gold had obviously taken them to a fancy photography studio to have a family portrait done.
He briefly wondered if Pibu would ever evolve, or if Gold planned on leaving him as a pichu. Silver somewhat hoped he’d leave the little guy the way he was. He had always been a fan of the naughty, yellow, creature. And the pokemon was a fan of his too, always leaving yellow fur all over his laundry basket and clothes. If Gold couldn’t find him, it was almost guaranteed he’d gone and fallen asleep in Silver’s dirty clothes.
Weavile seemed really interested in the photos, hanging off of Silver’s arm. Making happy little noises looking at all of his teammates and friends.
Each pokemon also got their own solo spread. Gold left thoughts, moves, types, silly little anecdotes of each. Silver was somewhat surprised to see his own team, but again he was starting to realize he meant more to Gold than Gold was capable of saying out loud.
The final pages were Silver with Pibu and Togebo. Half of them were older, before Togebo had evolved, the two pokemon seemingly following Silver everywhere, or using him as a pillow. The more recent photos had similar poses but Togebo was a togekiss.
Furrowing his brow, Silver really looked at the photos in front of him. He always knew the two pokemon liked him, but seeing proof, it seemed that they were almost obsessed with him, like they liked him more than their own trainer. That wasn’t possible though, they adored Gold.
There was no caption. The first two photos didn’t really fit the overall spread of the book, but maybe Gold had started it then changed his mind on what he was going to do, and never bothered to remove the old stuff.
Grabbing another book was easier, his curiosity easily winning out over his guilt.
Immediately he could tell this book was different. The first page held no photo, only a large caption. It must have been a guide like the one Gold had made for his father, Silver went to read it. It was obviously recent as the handwriting matched how Gold wrote now.
Unlike my other scrap books that are for preserving memories, this one's for photos that will never be taken. It is all the things I want from life that I know I’ll never get. I’m not sure why I created this book, maybe to bring myself some closure, to try to accept the things that I so badly want but will never have. I know there will come a day when I have to say goodbye, some girl will come and steal him away from me. Maybe I’ll swipe a bottle of something strong and cry while looking through this, drinking until I pass out. And maybe I’ll be lucky and get a dream of the things on these pages coming true. Probably not though, because even my subconscious knows that I don’t get a happy ending.
Stomach turning uncomfortably, Silver’s fingers ran over the indentions of the writing, they were deep, Gold had pressed hard while doing it. Gold had always believed himself not worthy. The daycare granny he works for had pulled Silver away once to tell him of Gold’s breakdown right before Pibu hatched, how he thought everyone thought he was a joke. How he thought of himself as a joke. He knew it was part of why Gold had trouble with using Togebo when they were younger, the pokemon was too much like him, and so Gold doubted the pokemon’s abilities because he doubted his own.
But Silver had thought the self-esteem issues were improving. Apparently not. He couldn’t understand how Gold didn’t see how wonderful he was. How kind, strong, funny, smart, and beautiful he was. It was clear to Silver, Gold was a huge catch. If only Gold could see it. As much as he hated the idea of watching Gold date, maybe it would be a good idea to try to set him up, find a nice girl who could see how amazing he is.
It would probably kill him. But if it meant Gold got his happy ending, then Silver would die a happy man.
There was a pull in the back of his mind to close the book, this was Gold’s private dreams, it was even more private than the other books had been. He’d be humiliated if he knew Silver was reading them. Yet, he couldn’t, he had to read it. A part of him wondered if he and Gold had similar wants and dreams from life. The difference, of course, is that Silver wanted a future with Gold, and Gold wanted a future with a nice girl.
Hand moving on its own, Silver turned the page.
Gold had pasted a cut out from a magazine, a house with a white picket fence, a nice garden, it was large but not too large, a classic New Bark style home. There was no caption. The next page held cut outs of suits, wedding rings, destinations for weddings, handwritten color schemes, possible themes, even ideal dates. There were no dresses, but knowing Gold he would probably want to plan the whole wedding and give his future wife the sole choice of her own dress.
His longing intensified as he turned the page, a page with a magazine stylized nursery, babies with red hair were pasted all over. Names were listed too with the gender for each Electrum (b), Amber (g), Bronze (b), Copper (b), Topaz (g), Amethyst (g), Steel (b)
Unable to decide if it was heartbreaking or touching, Silver looked at their matching dreams. He and Gold dreamed of the same life. If only…
If only Gold could feel for Silver what he feels for Gold, then Silver would give him everything he wanted. He would give him the sweet house, the nice wedding, and he’d use his father’s money and influence to find a surrogate to give him plenty of babies, enough children to run out of names for.
The next page was hand drawn, a matching pair of headstones, the dates were missing, in their place the words after a super long and happy life, at least 100 years old . Not expecting a name, Silver glanced at the top.
His heart pounded in his chest. A rush of emotions hitting him at once.
On one headstone was written Gold the other Silver
It was his name. It was written neatly, there was no way to mistake it for someone else’s name, Gold wanted Silver to lay in death next to him.
With shaking hands and a spark of hope, Silver turned to the final page. Again it was handwritten, an explanation of all of the dreams that Gold believed he’d never get to live out.
My dream is Silver.
I have loved him since I was 11 years old, and I will love him till the day I die. I want to have a nice house with a yard big enough for our teams to roam and children to play. But I would be happy with a shack in the middle of the woods, if it meant I was with him. I want a wedding that looks like it came from the pages of a magazine. Silver would look so handsome standing there waiting on me while mama walks me up to give me away. But, even if we couldn’t have a dream wedding, even if it was just us, our teams, our parents I would love it the same, as long as it was Silver that I put a ring on and that kissed me softly after saying our vows.
I know he wants a big family. I do too. I want nothing more than to run around wrangling little red haired children. All of us waiting excitedly for daddy to come home from work. I’d greet him every day with a kiss and supper on the table. We’d watch our children grow up, and eventually our home would be filled with grandkids visiting us, they’d sit on Silver’s lap and he’d tell them stories of all of our adventures, I’d bake cookies with them and lean against him with a smile falling even more in love with him.
We would die only moments apart. My only hope is that I would go first, for I could not imagine the pain I’d feel at losing him. We would be buried together in one casket and our bodies would rot away, and one day our bones would become dust, the individual particles so interlaced, we could never be separated. Our spirits would live on in the afterlife together. We’d be young again, just as in love, for all of eternity.
I know Silver will leave me one day, and lately I feel like it’s going to be soon. He’s been distancing himself. I understand, he wants to live with his dad. I’m happy they found each other and managed to grow close, yet I’m selfish, I want to keep Silver forever.
My dream is Silver. I’m thankful for the time I’ve gotten with him, even if it isn’t in the way I desire. I will spend the rest of my miserable life being devoted to him. Nothing he asks of me is too much, I will stand by his side with a smile the day he gets married even though inside I’ll be falling apart. I will hold his future son in my arms, promising to always protect him, I will not cry when I have to hand him to his mother, I will wait till I’m alone. It will destroy me, but I will be there for him through every part of his life.
When he dies I will follow quickly, and I know he won’t spend the afterlife with me, but I can’t stand the thought of being in a world without him.
I love Silver with all of my soul, I will always love him. It is my fate.
Silver read the entry at least 15 times. The words danced off of the page and into his soul. Each moment that passed, the other photo entries made more and more sense. The reason each entry with Silver was so detailed, the reason Gold had taken every photo, the reason Gold had written the dreams. Silver.
Gold was in love with Silver.
He snapped out of his stupor. Almost manic as he laid the open book next to him, he grabbed the next one he hadn’t seen yet. It was filled with the two of them hanging out. The captions were obviously not written of a friend, but a love.
Silver with his father, smiling after the pair had a successful outing.
Gold and Silver on the couch playing video games.
Silver training.
The pair battling.
Gold on his birthday, with Silver wearing a hat, his arm slung casually around the other’s shoulders.
All of the remaining books were the same.
He couldn’t help but to review the books he already had but with his new knowledge, the secret that Gold had hid away. A laugh bubbled out of Silver’s chest, he couldn’t help it, he had never felt so happy in all of his life. He traced the words, reading them over and over, memorizing the looks in their eyes, finally understanding the looks that Gold could be seen with when he looked towards Silver.
He loved Gold, and somehow against all odds, Gold loved him back.
Downstairs, the front door opened and closed.
“Silv?” Gold called,
“Upstairs!” Silver responded, he felt giddy. He set the book he was currently pouring through next to him, standing up to greet Gold.
He would be angry that Silver went through his personal stuff, but something told Silver he’d forgive him quickly.
“Dude, where are you?” He could hear Gold’s voice coming closer and closer until the familiar wild hair appeared in the open doorway, he stared at Silver with a tilted head, “What are ya doin’ in…”
He trailed off, eyes squinting at all of the scrapbooks laid out on his bed, weavile had been shoved off at some point to make room for all of them. A bright red blush covered the entirety of Gold’s face, going down his neck as he began to panic.
“Fuck.” His arms waving in front of him as he dove to close the books, he was shaking as he held the dream book close to his chest, he looked so scared, he knew he’d been caught,
“Silver I’m… I’m so fucking sorry! You weren’t ever supposed to see these. I swear I won’t be weird or anything, but-”
Deciding that Gold had enough waiting, Silver cut him off. He grabbed the other’s shoulders, holding him in place, those big amber eyes staring back at him, searching, sad; that wouldn’t do.
“You’re in love with me?” Silver asked, but he already knew the answer, really he just wanted to see if Gold would tell the truth, he wanted to hear the words from his mouth rather than read them again.
“I…I am,” Tears filled the eyes that Silver found so intoxicating.
“Good, then I hope you won’t punch me for this,”
Silver leaned forward, eyes flickering shut as he pressed his lips against Gold’s. He smiled as Gold let out a surprised squeak. His hands migrated down to Gold’s hips, pulling him closer. Gold was still, much too still, not kissing back.
Silver opened his eyes, to Gold’s look of pure shock. He rolled his eyes, pressing another quick peck against Gold’s pouty lips.
“You’re a dumbass, Gold.” Another kiss, “Writing all about how much you love me, never thinking to tell me, I could have done this ages ago,” Silver pressed rapid fire kisses against Gold’s face.
“Wh…What?” Gold stuttered, still mentally restarting, it seemed.
Silver pressed his forehead against Gold’s, “I’m in love with you too, and have been for the same amount of time, we’re both stupid, we wasted so many years pining over each other, when we could have been kissing each other.”
“You love me?”
Silver raised an eyebrow, he nodded, a smug smile playing on his lips.
“I love you, Gold, and I’m going to give you everything in your dream book,” Silver pulled away enough to pull the book from Gold’s shaking hands, “and so much more,”
He tossed the book carefully onto the bed then returned to kissing, Gold threw his arms around Silver’s neck, kissing back in earnest now. He pulled away, pupils blown, out of breath, but his face was bright, happier than he’d ever been before.
“I love you, Silver”
EPILOGUE
The scrapbook was closed with a soft thud. The red haired boy smiled, holding it close to his chest, he looked up at his father with a toothless grin,
“I like this one the best!”
Silver laughed, running his fingers through his son’s hair, “It’s a good one, isn’t it? Your dad spent a lot of time and money working on it,”
Leaning against the door frame, Gold huffed out a laugh, the baby in his arms smiling in response, little fingers reaching up to touch his face, attempting to stick his fingers in Gold’s mouth until he grabbed them, pressing a kiss against them,
“It was our wedding album! It had to be the best I had done at that point,” Gold responded, laughing again when Silver rolled his eyes,
“You’ve said that about every single scrap book you’ve made, I’m pretty sure you just like going to the craft store,”
Another little head popped in, big golden eyes with a pair of black pig tails, “Daddy, did you just say craft store?” She asked coming into the room with an expectant gaze,
“I did, princess, but not that dad is going, only that he likes going there,” Silver responded, pulling the girl into his lap,
“Can we go, though, pretty please daddy?” She blinked her big eyes up at him. She had Gold’s eyes, making her nearly impossible to say no to.
“No! I don’t wanna go to the craft store! It’s boring!” The boy next to him whined, Silver bit back a laugh as the pair of siblings started arguing, sticking their tongues out at each other.
“How about I go to the craft store with Amber and Steel,” The baby in Gold’s arms gurgled happily, recognizing his name, “And then when Copper wakes up from his nap; Electrum, Copper, and daddy can go train?”
The two older children discussed the matter between themselves, before giving identical nods to their parents.
Even though they were a bit over 9 months apart in age, they acted more like twins. Silver had held Electrum in his arms and realized he needed a baby that looked like the love of his life too. The rest of the children were carbon copies of Silver, but Amber and Gold would always remain the most spoiled, his princess and his Queen. Although when he jokingly said as much to Gold he received a slap to the chest and an insistence that he was more similar to a knight than a Queen. That conversation had ended in a wrestling match and Gold nearly throwing his back out, suddenly realizing his age.
Down the hall a door opened quietly, the little pitter-patter of toddler feet came down the hall. Copper rubbed his eyes, leaning against Gold’s legs, blearily watching the goings on.
Silver looked around at their children and his beautiful husband, they had a wonderful life, and he was so happy that he could go back at any time and look at all the memories on the pages of the scrapbooks that Gold had lovingly curated through the years.
Only one book, put away where tiny hands couldn’t find it, did Silver ever add to.
The dream book had a letter in the front, with additional pages added, similar to Gold’s pages, the dreams were all magazine cuts, or things printed off the internet, but with Silver’s note added. It sat awaiting the amber eyed man on the morning of their wedding.
I spent most of my childhood dreaming of a loving home, where there was lots of laughter, happy pokemon roaming freely, it was always warm. Once I met Gold I realized that there was something missing from my dreams, someone that I loved unconditionally and loved me back the same. Gold easily filled that space, and yet I believed I would never get to live out the dreams I had.
Until one day I got to take a look at his dreams.
I filled these pages with my dreams, all of which I will make a reality, because for Gold I would rope the moon and bring it down if he only asked. I dream of a home where I can chase our children all over, with a living room with space for me to slow dance with him while the radio places. A home where we can always feel safe, content, comfortable, a home where even when things get difficult I know I’ll always have him. We will grow old together, and then die at the exact same moment because I can’t exist without him. Our spirits will rise from our decrepit bodies and I’ll dance him around the world for the rest of eternity.
We may argue, we may fight, but even more, we will love. We will love each other, we will love our children, we will love our grandchildren, we will love our lives together.
This is more than a dream, this is reality.
Gold, I love you. I will love you in this life and the next.
You are my dream.