Chapter Text
Eight years ago…
This can't be happening, Shauna repeats in her head over and over again as she looks at the little pink stick she’s holding in her hands. It’s barely there, but she can make out that dreadful second line on the test.
She is pregnant.
Not only is she pregnant, but she is pregnant by her best friend’s ex boyfriend. She knew she shouldn’t have agreed to hang out with him after the break up. He had told her he needed comfort after Jackie ripped his heart out. Shauna had no clue he was wanting to do that. She just wanted to be a good friend, especially since she’s been hanging out with Jeff since their freshman year when he and Jackie first became an item.
This can’t be happening. She’s only seventeen! She had her ticket out of this miserable town. Shauna can feel her acceptance letter to Brown staring at her from her bedside table. She can’t escape now. She is stuck, all thanks to that stupid, second red line.
Shauna throws the pregnancy test on her bedroom floor before curling into a ball and breaking into sobs. How would she possibly explain this to Jackie? She’s pregnant with Jeff’s fucking baby! She is the worst friend in the world. What makes it even more terrible is she doesn’t even remember hooking up with him. Jeff had given her way too many beers that night.
This can’t be happening.
Shauna’s door swings open and in comes the person she’s been dreading to see the most since she purchased the test a few hours ago. Jackie.
“Hey, Shipman-” Jackie cuts herself off when she sees the state of her best friend. “Holy shit, Shauna, what happened?”
Shauna can’t even gather the strength to look the girl in the eyes, knowing in a few moments Jackie will see the test on the floor.
“Shauna?” Jackie whispers. “Shauna, please talk to me.”
Shauna shakes her head and just keeps crying into her bed. She can’t breathe with her face buried in her comforter, but she doesn’t deserve to after what she’d done to her favorite person in the entire world.
“I’m here, Shauna.” Jackie wraps herself around the sobbing girl, hugging her as tight as she can. “I’m right here.”
Shauna feels sick. She melts into Jackie’s embrace, scared that she’ll never get to be in it again. Her fears start to come true when she feels Jackie lift her head and pull away from her.
She turns her head to see Jackie getting up to grab the test from the floor. When she flips it over, the other girl lets out a gasp. “Oh my god.”
Shauna sobs even harder when Jackie returns to hugging her. She has no idea whose baby it is.
“It’s okay, we’ll be okay. I’m here for you, Shauna, through everything.”
As if God is playing a cruel prank on her, Shauna’s phone begins ringing and lights up with the name of the worst person to be calling her right now. Jeff Sadecki.
Jackie, of course, notices it and furrows her eyebrows in confusion. “Why is Jeff calling, what the fuck?”
Jackie has always been great at reading people and situations. It’s almost as if she’s psychic with how well and fast she is at this skill. Shauna prays she won’t be able to today.
Again, God must be playing a prank on her.
Jackie stands up and grabs Shauna’s phone, answering it for her. “Jeff?” she asks into the phone.
Jeff, being the stupid boy he is, doesn’t recognize his ex girlfriend’s voice and assumes it’s Shauna. “Hey, Shauna,” he says. “Did you get the test? What did it say?” He almost sounded excited.
This can’t be happening.
Shauna hears the phone beep as Jackie hangs up. Her best friend isn’t saying anything, which scares Shauna even more. She slowly turns to Jackie, just for the wide-eyed girl to toss the phone angrily, it landing right next to Shauna.
“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Jackie screams at Shauna. “Jeff?! You fucked my fucking ex?!”
Shauna can’t speak. She’s frozen in place. Her whole world is falling apart before her eyes.
“Well? Say something, Shauna!”
“I…I…” Shauna is stuttering, something she’s always done when nervous. Something Jackie knows.
“Fucking speak!” Jackie yells. “How could you do this to me?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”
All Shauna can muster up was a quiet, “I’m sorry.”
Jackie scoffs and tosses the test at Shauna, this time actually hitting her. Not hard, but it still feels like a ton of bricks to the girl.
“I can’t believe you can sit there and say that to me.” Jackie grabs her bag and begins to go through Shauna’s room, collecting all things she has left there over the years.
Shauna cries more. “Please, Jackie, no-”
“Don’t fucking talk to me. We’re done, I never want to see you again.” Jackie slings her bag over her shoulder before picking up a framed picture of the two girls when they were around 13. They were at their middle school graduation, so full of happiness and youth. She looks at it sadly before her face turns to anger. She slams the photo to the floor, shattering the glass; shattering their friendship.
Jackie makes her way to the door and turns to Shauna one last time. “Fuck you, Shipman.” The door slams behind her, echoing in Shauna’s mind as tears continue to fall down her face.
This can’t be happening.
__
Present Day…
Shauna feels anxiety overcome her entire body as she parks her mini van in the school parking lot. This year has so many firsts and she is all alone.
“Mommy?” a sweet little voice calls from the backseat and a genuine smile forms on Shauna’s face. Okay, she’s not all alone. Shauna turns to look at her perfect angel in the backseat.
“Yes, baby?” she asks her daughter. Callie looks terrified in her booster seat; she’s been dreading this since the last day of preschool. Kindergarten.
“I…I don’t want…want to go,” Callie stutters out, burying her face in her stuffed bear, a gift from her Aunt Taissa to try to comfort the little girl about her parents’ divorce.
The divorce. That’s another thing weighing on Shauna right now. Not only is she having to process that her baby girl is starting kindergarten, but she has no spousal support for it. She had just finalized her divorce to Jeff eight months ago. Sure, Jeff gets every other weekend visitations with their daughter, but he doesn’t care. He thinks if he pays child support he’s being an outstanding father. Callie doesn’t even want to see her father most weekends. If it hadn’t been for Taissa representing her and Lottie paying for Tai’s services, Shauna never would’ve been rewarded full custody.
“I know, baby,” Shauna says to her daughter. “But it’s gonna be so much fun! You’ll make so many new friends and get to learn new things.”
Callie shakes her head that’s still buried into the bear. “What if…teacher’s mean?”
Shauna lets out an enamored chuckle at that before reaching back to grab her daughter’s hand. “I promise she won’t be mean, angel.” Her daughter still seemed very skeptical so Shauna points to the bracelet on Callie’s wrist. “Remember what I told you about this?”
Callie nods pitifully and taps the sensor on her bracelet three times as Shauna feels the three pulses from the matching one on her wrist. I love you. Lottie got these for them so Callie would feel like she can communicate with her mom whenever she needed it. Shauna is so grateful for her friends.
“Anytime you miss me, just tap that three times and I’ll know you need mommy to tell you I love you.” Shauna taps her bracelet back and Callie giggles at the pulses. “There’s my smiley girl. Now…are you ready to go meet your teacher?” Callie takes in a deep breath and nods. She’s so brave, Shauna thinks as she steps out the car to get her daughter out.
Walking into the elementary school gives both Shauna and Callie a wave of anxiety. Shauna can’t imagine her little girl finding her way around this big school. She watches as Callie whines at the sight of the kids in older grades. She’s absolutely terrified. Shauna squeezes her hand encouragingly as they make their way to the table near the entrance to find out Callie’s teacher for the year.
“Callie Sadecki,” Shauna tells the woman working at the table, smiling kindly to hide any nervousness about the gigantic change in her life; in both of their lives.
The woman looks through the papers in front of her before making a small “ah” sound and handing one to Shauna. “Callie Sadecki, room 314. Miss Taylor.”
Shauna looks at the paper and thanks the woman before looking down at her daughter. “Alright, let's go!” she says as they walk towards the kindergarten hallway and begin searching for room 314.
The door of the classroom is decorated adorably, covered in pink flowers with the students names and a green stem with Miss Taylor written on it. Callie excitedly points at her own name and Shauna can’t help but smile at that. She knows her baby is going to be okay.
They walk into the room and see the teacher is talking to another mother with her also nervous child, facing away from Shauna and Callie. Something about being in the presence of this woman gives Shauna an odd feeling of comfort and familiarity.
When the other mother and child start to exit the room, the teacher turns to Shauna. The feeling quickly becomes panic. This can’t be happening.
“Jackie?”