Chapter Text
It didn’t take too long for them to schedule the appointment to a psychologist after the talk they had. Sitting on the passenger seat of Hanbin’s car, Ricky nervously fidgeting with his hands as they approached the psychologist's office.
Ricky’s heart was racing, and his stomach churned with anxiety. It wasn’t that he didn’t want help—he knew he needed it—but the thought of sharing his past with a stranger felt overwhelming.
Hanbin, who had been quietly driving, glanced over at Ricky when they finally arrived and Ricky's body language just giving out about how the omega wasn't ready to get off from their vehicles yet.
Noticing that, the alpha momentary pulled off his and Ricky’s scents patch, scenting the omega’s wrist as his coffee scents, engulfed the sour strawberry’s scent from Ricky’s nervousness. Ricky's nervous stance slowly fading as Hanbin kept releasing his comforting pheromones. After Ricky's scents calmed down to his usual fresh strawberry scent, Hanbin then put back their scents patch, reassuring Ricky with his soft smile. “You’re going to be okay, Ricky. I’ll be right here the whole time.”
Ricky nodded, though his throat felt tight. Hanbin then helped the omega to unbuckle his seat belt, the alpha also hold him tightly as they enters the building.
The waiting room was quiet, faint sound of soft music playing in the background. Ricky sat down, his hands trembling slightly. He glanced at Hanbin, his eyes filled with uncertainty and nervousness.
“I don’t know if I can do this alone …,” Ricky whispered, his voice barely audible. Hanbin didn’t miss a beat, easily slips his hand on Ricky’s trembling hand as he holds them tightly. “You don’t have to. I’ll come in with you, okay? If that’s what you want.”
Ricky’s relief was palpable, and when his name getting called, Hanbin hold his hand as he tow Ricky to the psychologist’s room.
“Excuse me, miss. Would it be okay for me to accompany Ricky for his session?” Hanbin asked first, and the psychologist—a kind looking woman with a soft smiles— nodded, saying “If that makes him comfortable, sure thing.”
They then sat down in the comfortable chairs with Ricky gripping Hanbin’s hand tightly as the session began.
“Ricky,” the psychologist began, her tone soft and nonjudgmental, “I understand this is your first time in therapy, and that can be really hard. I want you to know that this is a safe space, and you can take your time. There’s no rush.”
Ricky nodded, though his voice wavered when he spoke. “Thank you … I just … I don’t know where to start ….”
The psychologist offered a gentle smile. “Let’s start simple. How was your environment growing up, Ricky? We could start from there.”
That question just felt like as if the psychologist addressing Shen Quanrui he had spent years to hide. Ricky almost felt like he could just ran and never go back. But he do know that it still needed to be done, even though flashes of what had happened back there just came flooding in.
His eyes filled with tears almost immediately at the thought, and he clutched Hanbin’s hand tighter as he tried to speak. “It wasn’t … nice, I guess,” Ricky admitted, his voice shaky. “The pack was big … and everyone was just … scary. You’re nothing if you’re weak, you’re a disgrace if you’re delicate. They’re always so hard on omega, disgracing everyone that presented as other than alpha, a pack … with nothing but malice words and acts. What they had done is a lot, and it just … making me try my best to be whatever they try to make me be. But it was hard, I was nothing like that.”
Hanbin’s heart ached as he listened, his thumb gently rubbing the back of Ricky’s hand in a soothing motion. He stayed silent, giving Ricky the space he needed to speak.
Ricky’s tears started to fall as he continued. “I spent years … trying to leave what had happened there to just … stay there. But then, I realized … no matter how far I go, that piece of me from that place just follows me around. Its as if I got a reminder to never be what I am, I just—” he hiccuped, desperately gripped Hanbin’s hand as he struggling to force the words to come out from his mouth.
“I just, kinda grow to believe there’s no such place I could be myself, that if I ever did, I’ll end up worse than I’ve do before ….” Ricky bowed his head at that, sobbing. “I wish I could say anything good about where I have grown … but there's nothing to be said, it just— it just sculpted me into whatever mess that I am today.”
Hanbin growls softly at that, disliking how Ricky thinks so low about himself. The alpha’s hand pats him, then it hold him tight, a gesture to say that it wasn't true.
The psychologist hummed at that, brows furrowed a little bit her voice remains calm, “Well, Ricky. You're not a mess for starter. It sounds like there's a lot of pain you've been bearing yourself for that long. It would take a while to unfold everything, but that could be done slowly. Let’s set it aside for a moment, how did you feel after forming a pack with your bandmates now?”
Ricky’s tears slowed as he considered the question. His grip on Hanbin’s hand loosened slightly, and for the first time since the session started, a small, soft smile appeared on his face.
“It was … the greatest thing that happened in my lifetime,” Ricky said, his voice filled with warmth. “I've been worried when I didn’t present at all, fearing I would be exiled from the pack. But they’ve been nothing but sweet to me. They say they’ll love me for whatever I am; unpresented or be alpha, beta, even omega! I'm still their Ricky, it didn't matter. That's… something I've never heard. It makes me finally feel like I belong, for once.”
The psychologist smiled at his response, writing down something on her notes, “That’s wonderful to hear, Ricky. It sounds like your pack has been a huge source of comfort for you, which is incredibly important. It's good to finally have the place to be who you are, right? I bet they've become your safe place right now.”
Ricky nodded, his smile growing slightly. “They are. They’ve become my safe place for a while right now. I never felt more safe than I am today. It was the first time, I didn't feel the need to worry about what I would be, because they would love me still.”
The psychologist leaned forward slightly, her tone still soft but serious. “It’s good that finally your omega who had been repressed in response of trauma had finally presenting itself to the pack, because finally it feel safe, Ricky. However, we do need to be cautious.”
Ricky blinked, his smile fading slightly. “Cautious?”
“Yes,” the psychologist explained gently. “Your presentation was delayed, and while it’s a relief that it’s happened now, we need to be mindful of how your body will respond during your heat. The trauma you’ve experienced has already impacted your presentation, and it could affect your heat as well. It’s important to monitor that and seek help if things become overwhelming.”
Ricky swallowed hard, the reality of it sinking in. He glanced at Hanbin, who hadn’t let go of his hand the entire time. The steady presence of his packmate brought him some comfort, but the thought of facing another challenge after everything was daunting.
Hanbin gave Ricky’s hand another reassuring squeeze, his voice steady. “We’ll figure it out, Ricky, together. As we always said, you’re never alone, you got us.”
The psychologist smiled softly at the interaction. “That’s exactly what you need, Ricky. A strong support system, and it sounds like you have that with your pack. But if at any point you feel like things are too much—if the anxiety, the insomnia, or anything else gets overwhelming, don’t hesitate to seek psychiatric help. Medication can be a helpful tool, but we’ll start small. How about trying journaling for now? It can help you to process your thoughts.”
Ricky nodded, his voice quiet but firm. “I think … that would be okay for now. But I’ll make sure to ask for help if it gets to be too much.”
The psychologist smiled at his response. “That’s all I could ask, Ricky. You’ve been incredibly brave today, and I’m glad to hear that you’re willing to take the steps you need to take.”
As the session came to an end, Ricky let out a long, shaky breath. The tears had stopped, but the emotional exhaustion weighed heavily on him. He glanced at Hanbin, who had been his anchor through the entire ordeal.
“You did great, Ricky,” Hanbin said softly, his voice full of pride. “I’m so proud of you.” He said as he keep holding Ricky’s hand. Even when they bid their goodbye, also when they're out of the psychologist’s building, Hanbin’s hand never let go of him, always there, steady and giving Ricky the most comfort he needed. The alpha only let go when he helped him buckle up on his seat, smiles softly as he ruffles Ricky's hair once.
Ricky smiled faintly, the exhaustion clear in his eyes. “Thanks, hyung … Can we go home now?” Hanbin chuckled softly as he started the engine of his vehicles. “Yeah, sure thing. Let's go home.”
The drive back was quiet, the hum of the car lulling Ricky into a sense of peace. He leaned his head against the window, the exhaustion of the day making his eyes grows heavy with sleep.
“Hanbin hyung?” Ricky murmured, his voice soft.
“Yeah?” Hanbin glanced over at him. Worried if anything goes wrong with the omega.
“Can I sleep? I’m … really tired,” Ricky said, his eyelids already drooping.
Hanbin chuckles at that, the sound light and affectionate. “Of course, Ricky. Rest up. I’ll wake you when we arrive at home.” then, just like that, sleep come to Ricky faster than ever.
By the time they arrived back at the dorm, Ricky was fast asleep. Hanbin parked the car and carefully unbuckled Ricky’s seatbelt, smiling at how peaceful he looked. Without a second thought, he gently scooped Ricky into his arms, carrying him inside. Not having the heart to wake the omega.
As Hanbin entered the dorm, the other members were already waiting, their eyes widening slightly at the sight of Hanbin carrying a sleeping Ricky. Hanbin simply smiled, he sushed with his lips, motioned for them to be quiet as he carried Ricky to his room. The others obeyed easily, but Zhanghao still come with Hanbin to Ricky’s room.
Once inside, Hanbin carefully lay the omega down, then Zhanghao helped to take off his shoes then exited as he need to place it back to its place. Hanbin smiled at that, rips off Ricky’s scents patch, as he also ripped his too, then smiles as he smells their scents slowly filling the room. The alpha tuck the blanket to the omega after that, smiling softly as he watches the items that Ricky kept from his presenting are still there, with the addition of some new things.
He paused for a moment, watching the soft rise and fall of Ricky’s chest as he slept, before gently brushing a strand of hair out of Ricky’s face.
“You did amazing today,” Hanbin whispered softly, his heart swelling with pride. “We’re so proud of you, and we will be there through all of it, Ricky.” Hanbin make a promise.
As he leave the room, Hanbin then greeted by the glances of the rest of his members. He smiled, “Well, its time to let you guys know how it goes, wasn't it?” he teased, receiving glares from the others.
“You're just lucky Ricky choose you, hyung. But we do deserve to know about what we should be aware of,” Matthew said, pouting. At that, Hanbin couldn't help but chuckle.
“Absolutely. So yeah, buckle up. There's some things you all should be aware of ….” Hanbin recounts how it goes then. He keep his tone down as he tells the story to not bother their resting omega. And from there, their journey to Ricky’s healing journey started.