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Shoes? Check. Gloves? Yup. Sweater? On. Thick winter coat? Got it. Scarf? Tied and knotted.
Luo Binghe checked his clothing one by one. He was wrapped up all toasty and warm, well protected from the winter cold. A quick glance out of his apartment window showed the small, dancing snowflakes fluttering by. Rubbing his hands together, Luo Binghe was ready to leave his home and venture into the cold wilderness.
But, first, he ran off to his kitchen. There was a pan on the gas hob with nondescript food items in it, a bit of a mish-mash. Quite frankly, Luo Binghe didn't care as he whacked the temperature up to max and watched the flames lick at the metal.
He placed a pair of tongs on the work surface, and left an open tub of baking soda nearby. Then, leaving a cloth precariously close to the fire, he scampered over to his bathroom wall, and pressed his ear tightly against it.
The thin walls of his apartment didn't leave much to the imagination. Something he was thankful for.
Holding his breath, his well-trained hearing picked up the sounds from his next door neighbours bathroom.
Just like clockwork, Luo Binghe heard the creak of a door open, followed by loud off-tune humming. Although the notes were off-key, Luo Binghe easily identified the song as the opening tune to The Demon King and his Three Thousand Wives. It was a song that routinely blared through the walls at exactly 9pm every night.
Luo Binghe licked his teeth, running his tongue along the grooves as the expected rustling of clothing reached his ears. The items of clothing were dropped one by one to the floor, Luo Binghe swore he could hear the material being peeled from the person's skin, and he bit down on a gloved knuckle.
The sound of humming then became muted as the sudden rushing of water covered any other noise. The power of water hitting porcelain was loud enough to deafen Luo Binghe, and he pressed his ear impossibly closer to the wall. He licked his dry lips when the water sloshed and sprayed, indicating that a person had entered the shower.
A few minutes passed, the water continued to spray, the person carried on humming out of sync. Luo Binghe's skin heated up, a slight sheen of sweat on his brow, and the steam of the shower clouded his vision…
Beep, beep, beep.
“Shit!”
Slammed back to the present, Luo Binghe inhaled a lung full of smoke. Reluctantly but hurriedly, he darted away, wading through clouds and entering his kitchen.
He coughed and spluttered, trying to breathe as little as possible as he approached the danger zone.
As expected, a small fire danced on the hob, the pretty flames flickering and sparking, catching the nearby tea towel. The material crackled and burned, and Luo Binghe snatched up the tongs, methodically grabbing the tea towel and throwing it into a sink already full of water.
Next, he grabbed the flaming pan off the heat, moving it to a cool plate; he tossed in a handful of baking powder, and shoved a lid on the pan to suffocate the flames.
Once the kitchen was under control, Luo Binghe coughed a few more times, but refused to open a window. He silently counted…
One, two, three, four, five…
Right on time, his apartment's sprinklers activated, turning Luo Binghe's kitchen into a large, walk-in shower. Luo Binghe, with a spring in his step, skipped through his apartment, exiting into the building's hallway.
He spared a glance towards the door of the neighbouring apartment, his bones trembling with anticipation, but followed the slowly appearing crowd of occupants slinking out of the building.
The stairway was rammed, but Luo Binghe could easily see over the tops of others heads. He looked back from time to time, holding back the temptation to return to his apartment.
Patience Binghe, patience.
Once outside, a crowd of frustrated and freezing people gathered at the fire evacuation point. Luo Binghe was lucky. Everyone else was shivering, but he was comfortably warm in his thick, oversized coat.
Like many others, Luo Binghe stared at the apartment building, but while everyone else was trying to satisfy their morbid curiosity by finding a mass of flames, Luo Binghe stared at the ongoing flow of people streaming out of the building.
It was as the last few stragglers appeared that Luo Binghe's eyes lit up, then darkened.
He pushed through the crowd, uncaring as he shoved anyone in his way, unzipping his coat as he went. The edge of the crowd was at his feet when he opened his coat wide, welcoming another person.
“Yuan-ge, it's freezing. Get in here.”
A slender, lithe figure, wrapped only in a large bath towel hobbled over, carefully but hurriedly stepping on stones with bare feet. He launched himself into Luo Binghe's embrace and sighed with relief as Luo Binghe wrapped his coat around him and zipped it up.
“Thanks Binghe.” Shen Yuan stuttered, his teeth still chattering. “What bad luck! I was taking a shower!”
Luo Binghe stared at the head poking out of his coat. The short black hair was damp, a few suds still sticking to the strands, and Luo Binghe pulled up his scarf to cover his nose which felt abnormally warm.
“Mn,” he replied, squeezing the man in his arms, his own t-shirt growing damp from the towel. He cursed, though not due to his clothes becoming wet – he just wished he wasn't wearing any clothes at all!
“Sorry, Yuan-ge.” Luo Binghe apologised, not sounding apologetic at all.
Shen Yuan didn't reply, distracted by the arrival of fire engines and property management. Luo Binghe didn't care either, he just held the shorter man in his arms, sneaking an unscrupulous squeeze in here and there while he wouldn't be noticed.
He even helped Shen Yuan step onto his shoes, protecting those cute little toes from stones. A faint regret echoed in his heart as he noticed they were tinted blue. Maybe he made a mistake… he should have put a spare pair of socks in his pocket.
Ten minutes passed like that with the two men wrapped up together.
Finally, the firefighters emerged from the building and the all clear was given. After a brief announcement, the residents began to hastily file back into their homes.
Despite Shen Yuan being almost naked, he and Luo Binghe trailed at the end of the line, and it wasn't only because Shen Yuan was walking on Luo Binghe's feet.
“Mr Luo, a moment of your time please.”
As expected, a short and stubby man wearing a deep scowl called out to them. If anyone else were to be called in this tone they would have been sheepish or nervous, like a child caught with their hand in the cookie jar. Luo Binghe, however, only tore his eyes away from Shen Yuan for a second to spare the unhappy man a glance.
Sauntering over with Shen Yuan in his arms and on his feet, the wrinkles in the property manager's forehead deepened.
Trying his best not to stare at the person zipped inside Luo Binghe's coat, the property manager said, “Mr Luo, it seems that the alarm started inside your unit.” He then gashed his teeth. “ Again. ”
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. It was an accident.” Luo Binghe reeled off with a neutral, unapologetic expression. If anything, it seemed as if he wanted to unhesitantly admit he would do it again. However, there was a fireman next to the property manager and Shen Yuan pasted to his front, so he thought better of it.
This time, the fireman chimed in. He had visited often enough he was quite familiar with Luo Binghe.
“Mr Luo, you happen to have a lot of accidents in your kitchen. It's quite impressive how skilled you are at tackling small fires.” The fireman raised a brow and more than hinted at him. “We seem to visit this property at least once a week. Perhaps you should consider increasing your cooking skill rather than your fire fighting skill.”
Luo Binghe didn't reply. The less said, the better. Plus, he didn't want to waste time with these people. As much as he enjoyed having a barely clothed Shen Yuan pressed against him, those cute little toes really were starting to turn blue and Luo Binghe wanted to get his hands on them. To warm them up. Obviously.
The property manager felt his eyelid twitching at Luo Binghe’s lackadaisical attitude. Restraining his temper, he bit out, “Mr Luo, perhaps you should take a break from using your kitchen and give the emergency services a rest.” He then half joked, “they'll be billing you for their services soon.”
No one laughed at the thinly veiled threat.
In fact, there was an overly dramatic shocked gasp.
“You can't stop Binghe from using the kitchen!” Shen Yuan interjected, utterly flabbergasted at the suggestion. “His food is absolutely delicious! He's just a bit clumsy sometimes!”
“Yes, well…” The property manager felt a headache coming on, unsure where to look or what to think considering the man was stuck to Luo Binghe's front, tied up in his coat, with damp hair, and slender, naked legs sticking out. “His… clumsiness could set the building on fire and endanger lives.”
The fireman snorted but quickly stifled it after receiving a glare from the property manager.
Set the building on fire and endanger lives? With Luo Binghe's control of the situation, the fireman almost wanted to recruit him!
The reality of the situation dawned on Shen Yuan, but he was still reluctant to ban Luo Binghe from the kitchen. He chewed his lip, stewing over the predicament. All of a sudden, his face lit up and he jumped on Luo Binghe's toes.
“Binghe, I've got it!” Shen Yuan announced, practically vibrating with excitement. “You always deliver your leftovers to me every day, so why don't you just cook at my place? I can help you keep an eye on the kitchen so there aren't any accidents, and you don't have to make the trip just to deliver food!”
Shen Yuan was very proud of his solution if his smug smile had anything to say about it. He clung to Luo Binghe's shirt and blinked up at him, waiting excitedly for a decision.
Luo Binghe was, of course, elated with this suggestion. He hugged Shen Yuan within his coat, rubbing against him and nuzzling his cold cheek with his own.
“That's a great idea, Yuan-ge. Are you sure you don't mind?”
“Not at all, Binghe. I'll even do the washing up!”
“No need, I could never ask Yuan-ge to dirty his hands…”
A conversation of domestic bliss ensued where the property manager and fireman increasingly felt like flies on the wall. Was it just them or had they been forgotten…
“Ahem.” The property manager cleared his throat, stressing the seriousness of it all and bringing the pair back down to earth. “Mr Luo, I can't stress enough how these… accidents must be avoided in future, or the consequences will be severe an-”
Luo Binghe didn't wait for the older man to finish. He interrupted at once and, with a sincere earnestness, he promised, “There will be no more accidents. Now, Yuan-ge, you must be freezing. Come to my apartment and I'll li- give you a foot massage.”
Just like that, Luo Binghe hobbled off to the building with Shen Yuan attached to his front and his feet. Two men were left behind, light snowflakes dusting their shoulders. Months worth of inconvenience and hassle over just like that.
The firefighter clicked his tongue and wandered off to his truck, cursing about kids' courting methods these days. The property manager remained behind, coming to a decision: next time, he'll evict that little shit!
What a shame that the little shit would just end up added to his neighbours lease…