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1
PO-3122 is the head of his squadron. He is well-liked enough.
There's a Trooper being shoved up in front of him, forcefully.
"FN-2187 was caught trying to desert," PO-2456 says, and snaps out a salute. They call her Sting, for what she did with the taser that one time. "Sir."
PO-3132's nickname is Poe. He came up with it on his first night on the base. He started something of a trend - Poe's heard there's now a Car (KA-3178), and a Munn (MN-8900, because Double-O had already been taken). There's also Poe Two, although Poe's not sure the name counts. The kid's nice, anyway. He's funny and young, and when things are going bad on missions he's never the first to haul out.
"He's not from our platoon," Fives says, "we should take him back where he belongs."
Take him back - give him over to the higher-ups. Everybody knows what that means. The punishment for desertion is death. Everybody knows.
FN-2187's body slumps. His head lowers. There's something rigid, though,vin the set of his shoulders. Poe's seen that before. It's the same with every Resistance member they capture or kill, right before they get marched up off the gang plank or fall down in the dirt. Like it or not, I'm going out fighting.
Fives crosses his arms over his chest. He's steady on his feet, hefting his blaster in one hand. "He was going for the boundary fence," he continues. "I don't know how he ditched his troop. Nobody does. He won't speak."
Poe steps closer. "What do they call you?" he says.
FN-2187 looks at him. "Why'd you care?"
"Tell him," Sting snaps, and shoves her gun into his face.
"Hey, hey," Poe says, "easy. What's your name?"
"87. Just 87. Don't shoot." Just 87 holds up his hands. "Please. I'm - hold your fire - do what you want."
Everybody knows where this man's going. He's going to be shot. Poe will be present. He'll stand there and watch. He might even get promoted.
87 has a deep, rich voice. It reminds Poe of the one in the background of the propaganda videos. There was a reason those could always soothe him to sleep at night
"You got lost," Poe says, "and we brought you back to your troop. That's all this is. You weren't deserting."
"But - but - " 87 stops. "But that'd be - lying."
"Yep." Poe shakes his head. "You've got a lot to learn. Sting, help him up."
She does, glowering. Her nervous tick is rocking on the balls of her feet. "Sir - "
"We never knew," Poe says. "There are so many cameras on the outer fence. What's the chance of somebody monitoring all of them? And besides, this was all just a big misunderstanding. Right? You wandered off. Didn't you?"
"I wandered," 87 echoes.
"Good." Poe slaps him on the shoulder. "Let's get you to your group."
.
"Why didn't you turn him in?" Fives asks, in an undertone, on the way back to the base.
Poe sinks slightly lower into the ground, stepping into a patch of marshy grass. Fives is a good soldier,and an honest one.
"Because he made a mistake," Poe says. "He got lost. Now, he can find his way to our path again."
Fives seems satisfied with this. He nods, once.
(It's a lie.)
2
It's the day of Poe Two's first operation. They're all standing on the hovercraft, shoulders knocking. Every so often, Poe Two's hand will move against Poe's wrist.
"Stop coddling PO-2056, Captain," Phasma barks. She doesn't know his real name, Poe bets. She's wearing a green cloak. "Eyes front."
"Yes, sir," Poe says.
.
It's a village - the huts are brown, and there's some kind of resistance there, judging from the looks on the faces of the enemy. 87's crouching on the ground. The other Trooper's raising a hand, and it's going over his face. Then she's dead. Poe sees her body crumple. 87 keeps watching, though. He waits for her to wake up.
Poe crosses to him, and crouches by his side. "She isn't coming back," he says. "She's gone, 87."
87's head turns. There's a bloody handprint smeared across his visor. Poe's ventilation begins acting up again. He finds it hard to breathe.
"I don't want to be 87 anymore."
And Poe doesn't know what that means - whether it's part of my troop, or part of myself, or something else. Once, there was a story about a caged bird singing, Poe recalls. He can't remember it.
"'Cause that's what she called you." Poe loops a hand around his back, and drags 87 to his feet. "Tell you what. FN? That's - that's a Finn, right?"
Finn doesn't speak.
Poe leads him back up to the carrier. Finn ends up anchored against his side and the far wall. Poe keeps a hand on his back to steady him.
3
"FN-2187 attempted to leave the base, yesterday," Phasma says, and the bottom drops out of Poe's stomach. "What is your explanation?"
He clicks his heels together. He stands tall. This is what he has been taught to do, he thinks, and wants to scream. The heat of the fire still scorches the back of his neck. Poe sweats.
"He got lost," he says. "It was a misunderstanding."
Phasma's helmet was made so that no Trooper would see her eyes. That's what the stories claim, anyway.
"Back to your post," Phasma tells him, and turns and strides away.
.
Poe eats his rations with Sting and a new trooper called Three-Fours. Afterwards, he goes to spar, and passes Finn in the corridor. Finn's still walking stiffly.
"FN-2-87," Poe greets, and he wants to tell him how he should be dead - how they should both be dead - how Phasma, the incorruptible Phasma, turned a blind eye. And if she could then, who's to say that she hasn't before? And if she has before, what's to say that she won't again? And if gods have become mortals, what does that make those who were mortals before?
How many times has Phasma protected escapees? What would be the consequences if she was discovered?
"Captain," Finn says, and salutes.
"It's alright," Poe says, "if I'm Poe to my team, I can be Poe to you, too. Stand down, soldier."
Finn does. "Poe," he says. It's more of a murmur than anything else, really. Poe hasn't heard anything sound like that before.
4
Poe knows that he can't leave the Order. It's the only life he's ever known. He's grown here - learned here - had his first fight, his first taste of adrenaline singing in his veins. Fly, it is whispering. Fly.
Poe knows that he can't leave the Order. Finn, on the other hand - that's a different story.
.
"Hit harder," Poe says, and Finn does, bringing his fist around. Poe is knocked sideways. He staggers, but is stopped by Finn's hand on his forearm, keeping him upright. Poe grins.
Finn has a handsome face. He's got wide eyes, and plush lips, and he smiles brightly. Poe runs a hand through his hair, and watches Finn watches, and thinks, there could be something, here. He doesn't know where the thought comes from.
Poe takes a stroll with Poe Two, later, ostensibly going to sanitation. Poe Two's grown a little recently. He lifts his chin more when he speaks. Poe wouldn't be surprised if he was growing beard scruff.
"Phasma has not been sighted in two days," Poe Two tells him, as though it's the simplest thing in the world. He stops moving. "I wish her luck."
The propaganda videos that night are not overseen by Phasma, as per usual. Poe notices when he sits down. From his position, he can see the entire left side of the auditorium.
The next day, General Hux makes a speech. He speaks about desertion - about the cost of it, about the demoralisation, about the fact that they are fighting a war, and one that they will win.
Later, Poe learns that Phasma tried to steal a ship, and was fired upon and killed.
.
Finn is waiting for him in the entryway to his bunk. It's one of the perks of being a captain - you get your own cordoned off section, small though it may be. His helmet's held in both hands. "Sir," he says.
It's something that all the Troopers acknowledge - that sometimes, the Captains will choose an officer, and they will disappear for a couple of hours.
Poe promised himself that it was a privilege he would never abuse - but here is Finn, looking at him softly, and acting so uncertain.
"Shut the door," Poe says, and Finn does, and steps forwards. Somehow, without the exit into the corridor, he seems taller. "We're not going to do anything you don't want to. Okay?"
"I know what I want," Finn says, and Poe meets him almost halfway, Finn's hand cupping his face. They kiss, and Finn's touch is gentler than anything Poe has felt before - how did he learn it? Who taught him?
.
"We could do it," Finn says, afterwards. They're holding hands, sitting on the edge of the bunk. "We could run away. Phasma tried, but we're better. All we'd need is a pilot."
"There are Troopers I know," Poe starts, but Finn shakes his head.
"If we're doing this, we're doing it together." On our own.
Poe presses a kiss into Finn's hair, and manages to tug him closer. Finn's hands are soothing. They're nothing like Poe's, which are damaged at the knuckles and wrists. The injuries come from too many fights, Poe knows. Finn's seem clean in comparison.
Finn must see him looking, because he draws Poe's hand to his lips. He kisses each one of the pads of Poe's fingers. Poe closes his eyes, and tries to tell him to stop, please, but his voice peters out.
"I'm gonna look after you," Poe promises, as Finn lies curled in his arms. He tries to ignore the way the words are shaking from his throat.
5
A pilot is captured. She was attempting to defend her squadron - they must have wandered into the scanner's range by accident. Most of the squadron got away. Only one of them was caught in the cross-fire, plummeting to the ground. Poe watched the streaks from the window of the lower deck.
The pilot is dragged up the ramp towards Rex. She doesn't look as terrifying as Poe might have imagined - she's small and slight. But when she comes close, Poe gets one look at the smile on her face, and he knows what's coming.
Rex is Phasma's replacement. He's brush and short, with a temper that's resulted in MN-2346 being half-dangled out of the airlock (and she has nightmares, even now, kicking and flailing, Munn whispers).
"State your name," Rex says. "What is your purpose coming here? We will find your troop."
The pilot sends out a glare. She's got brown hair, and the darkest eyes Poe's ever seen.
"The Resistance," the woman snarls, "will not be intimidated by you."
Rex hits her, once and sharply, across the face. The woman's legs buckle.
"Bring her in," Rex says, and spins on his heel.
.
The pilot's called Rey. She's going to be sent into Ren - that's the rumour. Ren, the Knight. Ren, the war hero. Ren, who has killed people.
Poe stands outside the door and watches her. GH-3211 moves aside to let him past. Rey's not laughing now. She's got her eyes closed, and her hands strapped to her sides. There are red chafe marks on her wrists. Poe imagines her arms moving back and forth beneath them.
Poe is gone before Ren comes.
.
Poe corners Finn in the corridor, shoving him to one side. Before Finn can speak, Poe yanks off his helmet and taps on Finn's own. Finn removes it; Poe kisses him. Finn gasps against his lips.
"Save Rey," Poe says, and shoves his blaster into Finn's waiting arms. "Get her out."
"Not without you," Finn says.
"I can't leave." Poe shakes his head. "I can't. But you can."
"No." Finn's hold on him tightens, as he murmurs, "We're here. We're doing it together. Right?"
Poe stares at him. There's that gleam in Finn's eyes - the promise of freedom - and he's going to toss it away. He's going to forget it.
"Alright," Poe says, "if you want us both to go, then let's go. Now."
.
"The Resistance will not be intimidated," Rey yells, as soon as they walk in. Her eyes are red-rimmed. "The Resistance will not - "
"She's been doing that for hours," the guard on duty sighs, and when Poe tells him to leave, he goes. They're alone with her.
Poe undoes the bonds as rapidly as he can. Finn's the one who talks, though. He lowers himself down to the pilot's level, and hissing, "This is a rescue."
Rey's staring. Her uniform is hanging loosely around her frame. Poe doubted it fit properly when she was fully fed.
"Okay," Finn says. He takes Rey's hand in both of his own. It isn't the same way he holds Poe's. Poe's sure of that, at least. "Can you fly a TIE fighter?"
.
"We can do this," Finn says, and Poe does, too - they chant it together as they walk through the hangar bay, heading towards the ship - because Rey can fly anything, or so she claims. "We can do this."
"Give me the gun," Poe says. Finn glances at him, head turning slightly. He moves without questioning. That's how much he trusts Poe - that's the measure of care that he shows. Finn has always been so loving. Poe hates that it's taken him this long to realise it. "You need a distraction."
"No," Finn says, but Poe hefts the gun skywards. He fires - once, twice, three times. Bang, bang, bang.
"Run," Poe says, and it comes out like a scream, but it gets Finn moving, and Rey's tugging him forwards, but Finn's shaking his head and trying to go back, so Poe steps away, forwards. "Be a hero, okay? Be a hero for me."
As last words go, there have been worse.
By the time he looks over his shoulder , Finn and Rey have disappeared. Sting is moving towards him, quiet as ever, and yet Poe can't look away from the exit doors, even as she moves her hand to his shoulder.
6
Poe's waiting to be reconditioned. He stopped shouting some time again. This is how it is going to be: he's going to be led into another room. There will be a sedative. And then he will wake up, and he will have forgotten everything - Finn, the pilot Rey, Phasma, Sting, Fives, General Hux, Poe Two, Kylo Ren, Finn, 87, and such a small, tender, delicate smile.
This room is small and dark. There is a poster on the wall. Poe can't read the writing. The lights have been turned low. Everything is cold. There are goosebumps rising on his skin, pricking against his flesh. They removed his armour when they found him, leaving only his underclothes. Poe feels something in his stomach clench when he thinks about it, but he won't have to worry about that for much longer, will he?
The door opens. Sting walks inside. How fitting, Poe thinks - they've sent his own squad to do him in. Take him back. Everybody knows. He'll be a story by morning. When he dies, they'll all forget.
There are noises going on outside - the sound of klaxons, as familiar by now as sleep itself. Poe sits upright.
Sting crouches by his feet, her long hands moving swiftly. "Don't talk," she says. "Please."
"What's happening?" Poe asks.
Sting's head ducks. She removes her helmet, and her hair falls down around her face, and her hair is blonde, and her eyes are bright and blue, and she is strong. Her mouth is a thin line.
"It's a rescue," Sting says, by way of explanation.
.
Poe Two's standing by himself in the corridor and waving an impressive-looking gun. Where could he have got it from? "Stay still," he's hollering at a group of Troopers at the end of the walkway, "and don't move."
"What's going on?" Poe says. "What - "
None of the Troopers on the other side are moving. They seem at a loss of what to do.
"When FN-2187 - left," Sting says, "General Hux - he was - and they - "
Hux - a tall, thin man, with lithe fingers and a shock of hair. Poe thinks of the way he used to scowl at Ren, the way their palms would sometimes touch across the console - Hux and Ren, it appeared, had all of space before them.
"Munn shot General Hux when he was in the middle of his rant," Poe Two shouts over his shoulder, as if to spite those in front of him, "and then Fives shot Munn, and Three-Four shot Fives, and now nobody knows who's shooting who, only we think Ren's left the ship, and that makes it ours, doesn't it?"
"What?" Poe gasps.
7
On one of the propaganda videos, behind the marching lines of Troopers, there is a hill. The hillside is peppered with blackened houses, but running down it is a stream - and in the stream, Poe knows, there may be fish, and if there are fish, then there is life, and if there is life, then there is something that has not been burned, and there must be something that has not been burned, because there is water running - racing - down the mountainside. That's right. That's true.
Poe Two is on his left side, and Sting is on his right, and they're heading towards the hangar bay when Poe Two is shot. He falls to one side silently. It takes Poe half a second to turn, and in that time the life has gone out of Poe Two's form.
Poe doesn't recognise the Trooper holding the gun. All he knows is that he wants to kill them, so he does. Sting grabs his arm, and then they're running, sprinting for something, anything.
.
On that first night, there are eighty casualties. On the next night, there are sixty more. After that, the fighting seems to lull slightly. Poe is leaning back against the door. Sting's clutching her bleeding wrist, trying to stem the flow. There's rattling, and then there's stillness. They're in a box-sized space with a few others - Munn's go-to girl Kaya, and Car, and Six, and Halfway.
Poe closes his eyes. There is a knock on the door. Sting moves to answer it; she stops, hesitates, and continues, holding up her gun.
"I'm AS-8800," the man says. He has a deep voice which appears to be hurting him to use. "We're looking for a ceasefire."
"Agreed," Poe bites.
8
They end up meeting in the central room - the one with the balcony where Hux used to talk about dignity and honour and righteousness. It's fitting that they should all gravitate back to the middle point. Somebody's cleaned Hux's blood off the walls.
The representative for the other side is AS-8800, apparently. Sting ends up taking the reins for their - what? Squad? Troop? Whatever the case may be, she's confident. There's a sense of certainty around building her with every passing hour.
"It's been a massacre," AS-8800 says, lank hair falling in strips in front of his eyes, on the first morning of negotiations, "and we caused it."
Poe looks away, and thinks of Finn's grin and his hands in Poe's.
.
"Why would Kylo Ren have left?" Poe hears somebody ask, as he goes and fetches water. "It doesn't make any sense."
An image flashes - Ren and Hux, side by side, saying nothing at all.
"I've got no idea," a man replies, and Poe takes himself off before they see him loitering.
.
The deal stands as such: all who want to leave take six ships, and six ships only. The remainder will return to the nearest First Order base, and report who had turned traitor. The rebels would take enough supplies to last them for forty eight hours. After that, they were on their own.
Sting wants more time. She fights for it fervently, but to no avail. AS-8800 will not move. Originally, he said, he had been advised to turn the ship around and not let them have a break for freedom at all. He doesn't say break for freedom. He doesn't say chance. They could be rotting in prison or at the bottom of a swamp.
It is the closest thing to a compromise they have. Nobody has died over the course of its creation, yet.
Across the room, Poe catches Fives's eyes. Fives has his arm in a sling; he looks away.
.
The six ships are packed to the brim. Poe ends up pressed against the back wall. His elbow is in General Rex's stomach. Rex has taken his helmet off. He seems, more than anything else, to be tired.
The ship takes off. The floor rattles. Sting's head is titled upwards. She's smiling, Poe realises faintly. Smiling. When has he seen that before?
"Brave new sky out there," a woman says.
9
It's night when they finally put down. They have been on the run for four days. They ended up in a farmer's field, the first time - the cruiser was too noticeable, so they traded it in for the farmer's craft. It had been a relatively peaceable exchange.
("Give us the ship," Kaya had said, jamming her blaster in the farmer's face. He ended up giving them extra rations, too unsurprisingly. They hadn't been enough. They gave the youngest the most they could.)
The other five ships spread off. Whoever found the Resistance Rey spoke of first was to radio the others. That was the plan, anyway.
Sting has fallen asleep against his shoulder when the lights come into view. Poe's eye are falling; his head is leaden. Rex is snoring as he moves. He was supposed to be on watch. Will the pilot be enough? Poe's mind is clouded, but there are lights, and he can't focus on them - he's hungry, stomach growling. He feels as though his own body is eating him.
"A base," Sting says, suddenly awake, and all Poe can feel is a sense of emptiness.
.
There are several officials meandering around the launch pad. Their coat collars are turned up against the wind. The building is low, squat, and brown-brick. The planes outside are beautiful - they gleam, even in the dimness. Poe couldn't even dream of
"Uh," Poe says, "can somebody show me the way to Finn? I mean - FN-2187. He's - my friend. He left. I came to find him. There are a lot of us."
Poe gestures behind him to where Sting's crouching low in the doorway; she stands tall. She's holding onto her side, still.
"Welcome," the woman says. "Feel free to enter - however many of you there are."
Poe tries to step forwards, but then his legs buckle. Somebody catches him; Poe sags into his grip. "I need to find Finn," he gets out, turning his head. The man's tall, with short hair and a red face. "Does anybody know where he is? He did get here okay, didn't he?"
A woman in the crowd laughs. "Didn't he," she says. "We couldn't exactly have missed him."
"I don't know what to make of that," Poe tells her, raising his voice, "but I do need to find him. Is he safe? Have - has he - he isn't injured, is he? Please tell me he's alright."
"He's fine," the man holding him up says, swaying slightly, "but I'm not gonna be if you keep holding on so tight."
"I've been told it's a good personality trait," Poe mutters, and releases him.
("A Trooper with a sense of humour," the woman says, but Poe doesn't hear. "That's one for the books.")
"Is that General Rex?" Finn says.
Poe kisses him. Finn's lips are soft and tender; Poe moves a hand up to cup his face, marvelling in the warmth of it. It's even more beautiful than he remembers.
10
"I've missed you," Finn says, "I've missed you so much. Kriff, Poe, I should have come back for you. I should have - "
Poe shushes him. "Buddy," he says, turning. The sheets tangle around his legs. Finn's crying, tears running down his cheeks. "You have no idea how grateful to you I am."
"Yeah," Finn says, "about that. What - what happened back at the base, exactly?"
Poe starts to laugh.