Chapter Text
"I ran away from my wedding reception." Sirius said nonchalantly.
He sucked in deeply, and the embers on the tip of the cheap cigarette lit up beautifully, even when the young man looked up at the bathroom ceiling slowly and full of sure, showing his appearance untouched by commoners hands, and exhaled the smoke from his crimson lake lips with an expression of sinful pleasure.
He tilted his head to the left, and the golden yellow light fell on his aristocratic face and collar, and he opened his eyes slowly and full of sure, even his eyelashes fluttered amidst the smoke rising in between, and the pair of pale jewels greeted all of existences, and Remus' expression never lost sight of admiration beyond reasons.
The young man purred softly, "I killed my parents before I ran away."
One of the sleeves of the black silk satin dress slipped off his shoulders, and the ivory white skin slightly caught Remus' attention from the doorway, and the cigarette ashes that had gathered with cigarette butts and a cigarette box on the bathroom floor right next to the bathtub.
The smoke and its scent mixed with the dampness of the room in harmoniously, and Sirius who seemed reluctant to move from the place even since he forced his way in when Remus was about to close his coffee and pastry shop, and Remus blinked, and again, and again, and again, while counting the prime numbers in his mind and feels numb on his fingers.
"I know your deepest and darkest secret." He chuckled with twinkling eyes that outshone the stars upon the moonless night, and leaned his temple against the bathroom wall, then breathed out faintly, "Among them all, guess which one is true?"
"I don't know, and I'm not interested in finding out," Remus folded his arms across his chest, and moved his head, "I would rather have you get out of my bathroom, and from my flat and shop, and don't forget to take the rubbish out with you."
Sirius was silent for a thousand words, and it sounds poetic.
Sirius sucked in deeply, and the embers on the end of the cheap cigarette lit up beautifully, and it feels electric.
Sirius glanced at the mirror hanging on the left side of the bathroom wall, and saw that there were several polaroid photos attached with magnetic buttons to the mirror frame, and there showed a small child wearing round glasses showing off his gap teeth, and an Irish Setter chasing after a man holding the little boy, and some nostalgic school photos, and Sirius was about to look at another when Remus blocked his view, "Stop running your eyes over unnecessary things." He said and his voice sounded like he was holding back annoyance, "Now get out of my place."
Sirius make a sour face.
It was only for three and a half second.
"Well, let me tell you something," Sirius swatted away the cigarette in his long gloved fingers, and it floated just outside the bathtub before the ashes fell on his fluidity armor, "I ran away from my wedding reception, and before I ran away, I killed my parents, and in the other hand," He leaned to the edge of the bathtub frame first, and folded his hands over there next, then to landed his chin on the back of those palms effortlessly, "I know your deepest and darkest secrets. Among all of them, guess which one is true?"
"I don't want to participate with those bullshit-"
"-Oh, you should," Sirius shrugged with a light grin, "Play nice and I guarantee you'll live in grace and peace for years."
The night wind rushed here and there, it danced with the fallen leaves that fluttered on the surface of the earth, and it slapped the old window frames which had become brittle and weathered by time that had never been fair to its companies.
The sound of drunk people arguing, and others was laughing out loud like an ancient witch, and chatter as if they were gargling their mouths in barbaric, and it was quite cold outside because it was the peak of autumn, and pumpkin spices latte and ginger biscuits were always a prima donna, yet they could not beat Remus' desire who wanted to grab the sooty black hair like an indigenous waterfall that framed the stunning face and crushing their lips at once in a burning passion, or grabbing that slender neck to throw him out of the precious nest inherited from his great-grandfather.
"What I understand from all of them is that you're may or may not in a most-wanted person lists for a murder and tried to blackmail me."
"You could say so," Sirius nodded with a confident face, "I could say that I have the wild potential and full awareness to become a serial killer in just one night."
Remus huffed and looked not so impressed, "Now you're threatening me."
Sirius chuckled for three seconds while shaking his head, and said, "I didn't have any intention of threatening you. I just gave you a fair warning."
"Dull."
"Not really, it depends on how much you want to survive with a fatal attack on your body. I'm a simple man, and for me, that's good entertainment to relieve boredom while I wait for a knight in shining armor."
Sirius glanced at him in calm and precise while Remus grabbed his arms to keep him from running towards the absolute beauty of the young man, to pushing and caging his body, and biting down the lips that bared his tiny fangs with fiery smile, "I may be shorter than you, and I'm not as compact as you, but I know how to fight and dispose the body as I did to those two men on the Thames."
Instead of flinching, Remus just threw a look of disgust at him, "You're sick."
"If you mean the soles of my bare feet, then yes, it hurts a little, but that's nothing compared to what my parents did to me and my baby brother," He chuckled kindly, but not the facial muscles, nor those pair of eyes that looked empty and his very fake smile, "That's nothing compared to the abuses they put us through days."
"Right." The adult man responded in sceptical.
"So, I asked you nicely to be given a place to hide until my baby brother picked me up," Sirius freed himself from his position, and now leaned against the damp wall of the bathroom, and he lifted his right leg into the air to then rest on the knee of the other leg. Those legs were scarred by cigarette burns, and scratches, and cuts, and brutal smack here and there, and they were the color of mauve, caput mortuum, and payne's grey, and Remus looked away from the young man for the first time since they met in an unpleasant way, "No need to worry, I will pay you handsomely, and I'm sure he will come to me before the end of the night."
"What if that doesn't happen?" Remus asked through gritted teeth and a rumbling chest, "If he doesn't come to pick you up, you have to let me to take you to the police station."
Sirius laughed heartily, and it was like a combination of harp, harmonica, and violin intertwine each other in harmony, "It can't be, because he never turn his back from me, and so did I. I know that very well," They tickled Remus' consciousness, and it calmed his nerves because the vibrations seemed to penetrate into his body and wash away the rumbling in his soul, "I believe it heartily."
Sirius tucked his hair over his right ear, and there was an earring with a pendant in the same color as his lipstick.
Lightning strikes the mind as quickly as death picks up poor souls.
Remus is an attentive adult man.
Remus knows how to play nice for hours.
Therefore, he just sniffed in annoyance, then took the polaroid photos out of the mirror frame with emotions starting to rise to the top of his head, and chose to get out of the bathroom before he accidentally let go of control due to the provocation of the sexual tension that was rising, surging, and enveloped the existence of such raw beauty in the bathtub and ended with scandalous pleasures, when the unwelcome guest chirped in happy, “If you don't mind, whatever is left, I'd like some pastry and a bottle of mineral water, and don't forget to close the door, thank you. "
A portion of Alfredo Fettuccine, a three-tier of Danish pastry, and a bottle of mineral water were available on a wooden tray placed on the side of the bathtub, near the cigarette box of which now there were seven clean sticks, near the cigarette ashes and butts that were scattered carelessly.
Sirius puffed out the last of the smoke, and casually extinguished the embers on his left knee so that his leg jolted in surprise slightly.
Remus hitched in wordless.
Remus glanced at the young man who was throwing the butt nonchalantly.
Sirius took a pastry, then ate it calmly, and somewhat barbarically, and took a portion of Alfredo Fettuccine in his right fingers, then ate it calmly, and somewhat barbarically, and alternated it with pastry or mineral water in the palm of his left. Some cream and pastry crumbs caressed his colored lips and blunt chin, a moan of pleasure that flowed smoothly from his bare throat, and a pair of greyish-blue eyes glanced up between the golden yellow light in the bathroom, very straight and on point, aimed at Remus's hazel eyes which looked at him intently with a primal expression.
Sirius blinked mischievously, and his eyelashes fluttered, and sparks coming on the pale gemstone, and he grinned idly, "Stop looking at me with that look."
"What look?"
"A look like you're waiting for me to let my guard down," He swirled the last portion of Fettuccine on the silver fork, then lifted it high into the air, letting the tip hover just above his wide-open mouth and long-stretched tongue helplessly, "And wait for the right time for you to devour me with insatiable desire."
Remus left the place in no time.
Sirius laughed triumphantly.
Remus landed his palms on the edge of the sink, and his body leaned against them.
He looked down at the cooking utensils gathered there, looking dirty, and a little warm, and like they had been used, and Remus could still see the remains of the cream he had made for Fettuccine.
The adult man blinked, trying to normalize his vision which was starting to blur because it was too damp due to the tense that was clouding his consciousness.
His nose still remembered the scent of dried roses, cigarette smokes, and burnt vanilla that wafted from the uninvited guest. His lips were still imagining how he would kiss gently, and suck hotly, and bite aggressively on the crimson lake lips of the uninvited guest.
His fingers were still twitching, and they were getting more intense, and seemed to be forcing him to pull those hair like a night waterfall, or grip the neck which was long and like a new canvas ready to be colored, or circle and tie his fingers around the waist which was clad in a luxurious and exceptional corset of the uninvited guest.
Remus is an attentive adult man.
Remus knows how to play nice for hours.
Remus cleaned up the cooking utensils and the kitchen table while listening to Sirius breathed out unfamiliar melodies from his lips, and the small monologues of various desires he would do when things got better: approach his favorite tattoo artist and ask for the best service, or collect classic vinyl records after buying a second-hand in good condition gramophone, or filling his wardrobe with famous band t-shirts and really cool cotton, linen and leather, or the desire to learn how to ride a motorbike before having a Harley-Davidson, or about creating a mini library with his baby brother in their shared flat they dream of, or learn to cook together from video tutorials, or learn about astronomy and archaeology, and world mythologies, and what it feels like to love and be loved wholeheartedly, and again, and there are still many, even trivial things that other people take those for granted because they can have them so easily in blessings and enough privileges.
The first thing he saw was the verdigris colored ceiling of the room and the small crystal chandelier in the middle.
The second thing is the silence of midnight apart from the clock ticking softly on the bedroom wall to the right, and the sound of the heater at the end of the stand hanger on the left, and the scent of pine forests from the aromatherapy candles on the dressing table, and the cell phone lying on top of wireless charger on the nightstand.
The third thing was how thirsty he was, and Remus moved awkwardly, and walked in a little sway because of the fog of sleep that still reigned, and as he passed the closed bathroom, and with his eyes blinking, and again, and again, and his ears heard grieving sobs from behind.
Remus stopped, and he turned around.
The haze of drowsiness disappears in the blink of an eye, and thirst disappears in the long of a deep breath.
Remus took small steps at first, then the distance of the steps increased, and the closer he got, the clearer the anguished words between the sobs, and his heart was beating fast, and his blood was rushing wildly, and his open arms were hanging at the sides of his tensed body, and he heard Sirius chanting one name, and two, and three, and over and over again in a wet voice, at something, or someone, or nobody, and expressing anxiety, and fear, and resignation, and despair.
It made Remus' ears ring loudly.
It made Remus' conscious mind thrash.
Sirius is an absolute madness being.
He was radiant, and shining brightly, and steadfast with a formidable mind, and he was an existence that was not worthy of being touched by common hands. He is a rainbow after a rainstorm. He is a stretch of plain white after a snowstorm. He is a heavenly melody after earthly silence. He is calm clear water, and burning fire, and wild wind, and blooming beautifully like his mother's spring flowers that grew, blossomed, and lived gracefully.
He was everything that was poetic to Remus.
He was not everything that was sorrowful to Remus, who he curled up and felt small in the bathtub, and his long and wavy hair hung down carelessly, and covered his face which was hidden behind the palm of the hand, and let his body tremble because of the ugly feeling that took over his weaken mind.
Remus knelt down, he bent over after, and then landed his right palm on the bathtub frame attached to the wall, to cage Sirius who looked meek, helpless, and let the guard down, and he brought his face closer to him very slowly, "Stop crying," He said rather cold, "You're disturbing my sleep."
Sirius did not do it.
He was still sobbing but in a low volume.
"Do not act that you are the most miserable thing in the world, nor the weakest among people," Remus continued, "You ran away without proper clothes in this autumn, and not even with a footwear that made your soles scratched, injured, and swollen, and you keep forcing yourself to leave from a place you despise, and that's incredible."
Sirius was no longer sobbing and his body was no longer shaking.
His face was still hidden behind those fingers.
Remus brushed his hair gently, and tucked them over his ears, and his fingers crept down to the back of his neck and placed a possessive grip over there, "Really, you survived that horrible place until you finally had a chance to escape, and barging into strangers' places and hiding in their bathroom, and asking them to give you food and drink while you wait for the knight in shining armor," He whispered through gritted teeth, "You seemed confident in all of it, and that caught my attention. But then look at you," One enough grip and Remus grabbed Sirius until he gasped sharply, "You look pathetic, and resigned, and desperate, and I don't like it. You don't deserve all of that, and the rest of it, and I will stop it for you," A pair of eyes met each other straight and unwavering, and beautiful glints were etched in them, "I will take it all from you, because you deserve good things in your wonderful existence."
Remus watched as the young man's face was wet with tears, and red from one cheek and across the nose and onto the other, and the make-up was melting, and Remus had never seen such raw beauty, and at the pair of irises that were bulging behind the teary eyes, and the tips of their noses touched, and tickled each other.
He might be able to see the small scars and swelling on the face very very faintly, yet he did not take any matters.
Remus glanced at his slightly gaping lips, then he saw that they were moving slowly, "How did you get the scars on your face and hands?"
"A pack of wolves attacked me while I was playing hide and seek in the forest. How did you get those scars on your legs?"
"Chronic physical abuses from my parents and some of my extended family who were as abusive as they were."
Those eyes closed, and he let out a whimper as Remus kissed the top of his wet cheek like a butterfly sucking flower nectar, "I ran away from my wedding reception after I killed my parents."
Their breaths greeted each other, and mingled, and danced together, "I was forced to do it because they decided to marry me without my consent to my father's uncle just because I don't like women and he wanted to have me as property to show off and get me strip naked in front of all family."
The tears started to appear again and Remus would not allow them to fall again on that beautiful face, "My family is a group of extreme, incestuous elitists, and I, my baby brother, and our cousins are the result of that disgusting family legacy, and my parents had no problem handing me over to an old man who his age is already on the edge of death and deserved to live in the grave."
The whimper came back, and Remus soothed him carefully, "I hate it. My brother does too. Enough is enough, and we did what we should have done in the first place years ago."
"It doesn't matter if it's a little late," Remus responded with an unpleasant hummed, "It's better than nothing and everything will turn completely impossible."
He trailed butterfly kisses downwards, "You're tough, and determined, and not giving up on your life in that place while it was never be something you should feels happy to remember."
At the rim of the ears, and the folds of the nose, then the corners of the lips, and enjoying shallow breaths from the young man in his arms, "You're amazing, and beautiful, and heavenly," Towards his jaw, and down to his bare neck that glistened in the golden yellow light, "You're exquisite, and breath-taking, and out-standing, and everything about you is a poem-worthy, and I'm here for it. I'm here for you."
"I want it," Sirius tilted his head up, and he arched his body, and Remus gave a hum of appreciation, and it made him quiver helplessly, "I need it."
"And what is that?" Remus traced Sirius' collarbone, "Is it my unquestionable love and praises to taint your body completely?" And the crook of his shoulder, and at his Adam's apple that gulped in passion and longing, "Or is it my undoubted devotion to fill your mind thoroughly?"
"Both." Those pale, sparkling electric eyes widened as if they were in love. "Give me both of them."
Both were given Remus gladly to the vulnerable Sirius.
Regulus arrived an hour and thirty-five minutes early before dawn.
Regulus did not force the kitchen's back door open, Remus unlocked it when Sirius was still lost in earth-shattering feeling after the intense touching they had in the narrow bathtub.
Regulus did not even force the door leading to the flat open, Remus slid out the lock when Sirius was washing his body which was now painted in bite marks, hickeys, and passionate kisses among those abuse scars.
Remus did not expect anything from Sirius' younger brother who helped in the murder and ran away with his brother, and he did not expect that the figure sitting perfectly in his grandfather's chair and his legs crossed over its ottoman was like a moon split in two: an aristocratic face with excellent cheekbones, a small and sharp nose, then his small, light red lips, complemented by short, wavy ink black hair, and a bearing like a haughty noble. He was wearing a pair of suits complete in appreciative vest and tie, and a handkerchief was stuck in its outer pocket, and Remus noticed that he was also barefoot and did not seem to care about it. The young man folded his arm in calm, and a pair of familiar eyes that looked exactly like Sirius' caught him with a judgmental look.
Remus was lucky he had tidied himself up in the bedroom.
Less awkward than getting caught red handed still in not presentable looks with an unimpressed expression by the younger version of the stranger man he just copulate with.
Sirius broke the silence first.
He called the brother's name, then ran towards him with open arms and a cheerful laugh, and in the blink of an eye, Remus saw the two of them hugging each other tightly, and whispering affectionately, and laughing softly, then turning their bodies in all directions, dancing to the pseudo-rhythm.
Remus watched the longing reunion with a feeling of joyful welling up in his mind.
Until Regulus broke the happiness with a state to leave this place as soon as possible.
Sirius fell silent, and the joy radiating from his body disappeared instantly. He looked hesitant, and undecided, and every now and then gave Remus a glance that conveyed surprise on his calm face.
Regulus was observant of this, thus he was the first to interrupt before Sirius' younger brother hissed and slapped his older brother with a hurtful statement, "I know a place," He said, "It's quite far from here, and secretive, and surrounded by tall trees. The owner always said that it was an humble cabin, but if you look at it, it's a minimalist manor that's big and spacious enough for a small family," He landed his palms on the hips, "If you want, I'll take you there and ask the owner to give you a place to settle down for a while."
"Oh, I don't know," Regulus replied with narrowed eyes full of suspicion, and Remus did not take it personally, "I'm not sure I would believe that statement and accept the offer."
"You don't have to be sure of the statement and accept the offer," Remus nodded in understanding, "But you have to be sure of the decisions you would take while your position isn't in a favorable situation." He continued, "It would be better to stay temporarily in a decent hiding place rather than wandering around somewhere with a never-ending feeling of alertness and anxiety, isn't it?"
Regulus waited in the shop area downstairs, and Remus is ready with car keys, building keys, a phone, a wallet, a hand gun, and pairs of varsity jackets for the two brothers from his wardrobe when Sirius blocked his steps in the doorway.
Sirius linked his fingers behind his back, and he tiptoed a little, then looked at him with a radiant face, and full of gratitude, and full of love and mercy.
Sirius leaned up and gave his chin light kisses, "Thank you," He whispered, "You are a very helpful and delightful host." Then he glanced down, and silence enveloped the two of them for a few moments before he finally continued, "I hope we can meet again in better situations other than this, and if Regulus is willing to accept your offer, I hope," A pair of greyish-blue eyes glanced at him from behind his bangs, and Remus saw a swirl of hope and longing over there, "I hope you-"
"-Tell me what you really want to say exactly." Remus cut in firmly and uncompromisingly, and it surprised Sirius, "Beg for it."
Sirius hitched.
His eyes widened and filled with tears.
He bit his lower lip and glanced to the side.
He opened his mouth with a slight tremble, and took a breath to prepare himself, and looked sharply at Remus after he wiped the tears that had begun to clot on the pair of precious jewels, "I don't want to stay at your acquaintance's. I don't want to leave this place." He whispered wetly, "I want to be here with you." He beg sweetly, "I choose to be here with you."
Sirius reached Remus' waist and gripped it tightly, and Remus enjoyed the fighting and powerful glint in those eyes, "You can't say no, and I won't let you say no because I know your deepest and darkest secrets."
"And what do you know?"
Sirius gasped, then growl lowly, and opened his mouth with confidence and certainty, and before he had time to say all the secret things he knew to the world and everything in it, Remus grabbed his jaw first, and tilted his head up as he bent over him just a little, and stuck his tongue in the deepest and darkest of the naked lips, and the two of them were lost in a burning and intimate kiss.
Remus is an attentive adult man.
Remus knew how to play nice for a while, whether with anything or anyone.
James was the best player he had known so far during his time at the agency, and he thought it was a perfect time for them to return to gruesome fields that were full of adrenaline junkies after years of leave while they both had someone to live with who could share the duties of looking after Harry.
Harry was good at winning the hearts of people with doeful eyes as green as a tropical forest at the end of the world, and he bet that the little boy could melt Regulus' cold demeanor in no time.
He also bet Regulus could bring James' heart back to life in no time.