Chapter Text
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“MIZUKI!!”
“I…”
“Why..!!”
Ena stared down the hallway, eyes tracing the place where the figure of her best friend had been moments before. The closing of the door still echoed, leaving it as the only sound left to accompany the heavy breaths she couldn’t manage to force back in. An unrelenting whirlwind of thoughts dragged her down, slowly pulling her out of reality.
I couldn’t find the words in time… and now she’s gone.
Why… why couldn’t I just– !!
…I’m such an idiot, huh?
Ah… everything is so fuz..zy…
* THUD *
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“Our booth was a great success, don’tcha think Akito? Kusanagi-san?”
An beamed at the two of them, fiddling with her tie as she spoke. Kusanagi nodded affirmatively, which prompted An’s grin to grow even wider. Akito couldn’t help from letting on a soft smile of his own, genuine feelings of pride filling him as he thought back on the day's work.
“I guess so… we’re lucky so many of our classmates enjoy making clothing” He commented, before begrudgingly adding on– “And it was… nice, seeing everyones reactions.”
An pumped her fists energetically. Eh, how much energy can a person have after such a long day..? “Mmh! Everyone seemed so happy! Mizuki, Ena-san and their friends were definitely a highlight though! They looked like they were having so much fun!”
“Really..? I sorta thought they were fighting over the props…” Kusanagi tilted her head curiously. Akito tried (and failed) to force down a laugh at the girl's confusion. “Oh, they were. My sister and Akiyama are always bickering.”
“Buuut that’s just ‘cause they’re super close!” An butt in, eyes shining with a mischievous glint, “Mizuki talks about her a lot, y’know?”
I’m not sure I like the tone she had with that…
…But she’s not wrong, in implying it.
“I think it goes both ways.” He mumbled confirmation, looking off towards where the rest of their classmates were still tidying the area where their stall had stood.
“Mizuki?!”
The familiar cry of Kamishiro’s voice pulled the trio out of the conversation instantly, drawing their attention to an obscured pink figure sprinting away. Before anyone could process the visual information, the blur– presumably Akiyama– was gone. Akito locked eyes with Kamishiro, who was standing shellshocked beside Tsukasa.
What the hell even happened? Akiyama was acting like they were running away from something horrible.
…Where’s my sister?
“M-Mizuki?” An stuttered as Kusanagi let out a weak “Akiyama-san?”, breaking the tense silence for a brief moment. Kamishiro appeared devastated, something Tsukasa clearly caught onto as he clasped the others hand in his own reassuringly.
Kamishiro… was talking to Akiyama earlier. They’re friends– he must have an idea on what all that was.
Akito glanced back at the building Akiyama had come running from, pondering. An had already rushed over to Kamishiro, hounding him with nervous questions on what they’d just seen. While he was curious about everything, he felt something drawing him to check inside first. Allowing his feet to move on their own, Akito found himself making his way over to the towering doors and pushing on the panic bar.
His eyes instantly fell upon a collapsed brunette sprawled out on the floor.
“...ENA?!”
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Serves me right.
Mizuki could barely feel anything, not anymore. Their heart clenched in their chest as they let out sharp inhales, the pace of their sprint quickly catching up to them. Still, they pushed onward– away from that horrible school, away from Ena’s stunned face, away from everything that could hurt them…
Away from the truth they promised themself they’d face.
I kept running, running, always running.
The trees and buildings around were nothing but a green-gray blur. An occasional blue– their pinks were horribly out of place. They were horribly out of place. They had to resist the urge to scratch their arms, scratch away the skin of the body they’d been so horribly forced to upon birth. The cursed body that had caused all of their problems, turning what could’ve been a perfectly normal life into one of ridicule.
Was it really their body? Or was their brain the problem, poisoning what should’ve been a boy with taboo thoughts and feelings. Mizuki knew their heart was that of a girls, but if that were true why was the world not kinder? Were their crueler classmates correct all along?
It didn’t matter, anyways. They’d come to terms with what they were. Yet still, they couldn’t face their best friend, the girl they’d known for ages. The girl who read their every thought and feeling uncomfortably accurately. Somehow, Ena always seemed to get it.
The two of them were stuck in a constant game of push and pull, always orbiting one another but never getting too close. Mizuki had finally made the choice– they’d put what little faith they had in change and went to take the leap of faith. But that leap.. Never ended up mattering at all.
I was even hoping someone would just spit it out for me.
They were, weren’t they? Even after sending Ena that message, even after asking her to meet on the rooftop, deep down within them something desperately craved for someone else to do the heavy lifting.
It burned . They were wrong, it was so much worse having the words robbed from them, Ena said she’d wait, she did wait. If Mizuki truly couldn’t choke the words out, no one would’ve understood better than Ena. But they didn’t get that choice, no, it’d been taken and twisted.
Their classmates had even assumed Ena was like them, born broken. How horrible.
Well, I got exactly what I wished for, didn’t I?
It was funny, in retrospect. There was no one to blame but themselves for their stupid desires. They’d brought this all upon themselves by hiding for so long, not facing Ena and the rest of the circle sooner. Mafuyu and Kanade would surely know soon, Ena would have to say something about Mizuki’s absence.
In running, they’d furthered the change they hoped so desperately to prevent. How ironic.
Ahh…
The noise in their head had grown to be far too much to take. There was nowhere left to go but…
But…
Their death sprint came to an abrupt stop as they pulled out their phone, clicking until they reached a familiar song title. What had once been a track of desperation had been exchanged for a more hopeful tune. Yet, staring down at the song, it felt wrong for them to enter the empty world. The new song no longer sang to the same rhythm as their heart– it was all out of sync, distorted.
But where else could they go where they wouldn’t burden anyone with their struggles?
Ah.
There was only one choice, in the end.
After everything…
I want to disappear.
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♫ Now Playing : Twilight Light
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