Archive of Our Own ^beta

It started with shouts, banging on the door, a game of black-jack between Wolfwood and Meryl being interrupted violently when an unknown device was tossed into their room through the cracked open window. Then there was gun fire. Bullets flying past with a zwip! And tearing through the wooden walls of their hotel.

Vash couldn’t find his friends as he stumbled around blindly in the smoke, bumping into bodies that tried reaching out for him. Smoke quickly filled the room from the device, and he soon found he wouldn’t be able to breathe either. Vash felt around, pressing the sleeve of his jacket to his face, trying to lessen the amount of smoke he’s inhaling, but it did nothing to ease his lightheadedness.

“Wol- COUGH - Wolfwood!! Mer- hack- yl!!” Vash called out, his voice rasping, but all he heard was more gunshots and screams. Vash felt around the room, hand on the wall, but halted his movement as bullets flew past. Vash ducked and dodged as best as he could with how light headed he was, “Where are you guys?!” He said, gasping and wheezing for air.

A bullet was bound to make a home in his body somewhere sooner or later. Pain shot through Vash’s right thigh, and he let out a garbled groan of pain, placing a hand over his leg and shifting his weight to his left.

The world began spinning, his legs were trembling, heart pounding in his ears, and he was starting to feel peacefully warm. Vash struggled to keep his eyes open, his body forcing him to breathe only to choke on the smoke.

Vash slumped forward, but before his consciousness could fully slip, he felt a pair of warm, soft, arms catch his weight and lift him up, and a gentle voice mumbling just above the ringing in his ears

“It's alright dear, you did a fine job. Relax now, and let me handle this.” Then everything went quiet.



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Bullets… smoke… dangers… pain…

Bullets.. smoke.. dangers.. pain..

Bullets, smoke, danger, pain!

His friends, where are his friends?!-

Vash’s eyes snapped out, sitting up with a start and a small gasp. “Wolfwood!! Meryl!!” Vash yelped, head whipping around to look at his surroundings, where are they?!

He’s in a cave right now, mostly dark except for the entrance where light poured in from the twin suns outside. The cave is surprisingly large, and clean- for a cave anyways- with no sand on the smooth floors and even lanterns hanging from outcroppings, casting a warm glow throughout the whole space.

Vash felt a hand press to his chest, pushing gently, and a soft voice tittered. “Shhhh, now now hun, don’t move around too much or you’ll anger your injuries, I’m not done patching you up yet so please lay back down.” Vash looked down at the hand forcing him to lay down, it was vaguely human-like, covered in milk chocolate brown fur and had claw-like nails. Vash blinked a few times in confusion, flowing the hand up the arm it belonged to and then to the arms owner.

Smiling down at him was not a human, a humanoid he’ll give it that, but not a person. From head to toe was a humanoid covered in brown fur, it had large ears with light pink skin on the inside, and a muzzle where its mouth and nose should be, nose a dark brown. Ruby red eyes stared down at him, full of concern, and a pair of… swim goggles?- pushed back a tuft of hair on the top of its head.

Notable mentions where the clothes it wore, being brown overalls and a cream colored button up shirt. 

The creature looked suspiciously like a really big humanoid rat

“My friends-” Vash croaked, the creature gently cut him off, “Are safe and under my care. They’re just behind you, rest easy as they are in good hands.” The creature soothed, its voice a smooth comforting rumble that echoed off the walls. Vash craned his head to look behind him, twisting his back to assist in the movement. And would you believe it? Wolfwood and Meryl were fast asleep against the cave wall, Meryl’s head resting on Wolfwood’s shoulder.

Vash felt hands grab his leg, the injured one, and it was then that Vash realized he had been stripped down to his boxers in favor of reaching the wound. Vash tensed but the giant rat cooed softly. “Relax, I won’t hurt you. I can’t fix your injury if I can’t reach it.” it paused, putting Vash’s leg to rest on its, then rustled around for more bandages. Vash laid back down on the cold floor, crossing his hands over his stomach, looking up at the ceiling in a daze.

Vash wanted to question it, why is it helping them? But for some reason, he almost blindly believed it, like his sense of danger is being dulled under its care. It was like cotton stuffed his brain and all he felt was a warm blanket of comfort.  

“Believe me, I would have asked permission if you had been responsive, but unfortunately you turned into a sack of potatoes the moment I reached you and hadn’t been responsive ‘till now!” The creature chattered, grabbing Vash’s leg again and then packed the wound with gauze, Vash winced and whimpered in pain, but didn’t fight the creature as it worked, deft and nimble hands wrapping the bandages around his leg.

The creature gently set Vash’s leg down on the ground, then smiled down at him, “All done! You did a wonderful job my dear, thank you for being so compliant. you can go visit your friends now- oh wait your pants!” The creature cut itself off as it leaned over Vash and grabbed what sounded like clothing, it helped him sit up slowly and carefully then shoved his pants into his hands.

“Humans seem uncomfortable without these on, so please clothe yourself again. I have to attend to some other matters, so please feel free to make yourself at home!” The creature jumped to its feet, which were not even closely human, instead its feet were hind rat paws. And to really drive home everything Vash has seen, a fleshy tail swished behind it.

Vash nodded numbly, the rat nodded back and turned on her heels, prancing over to a different part of the cave. Vash slowly got to his feet, shimmied his pants on, buckling his belt, and then stumbled over to where his friends rested peacefully.

Vash crouched down in front of them, placing a hand on both their shoulders, shaking them lightly.

“Wolfwood, Meryl, are you guys ok?” Vash asked, concern plaguing his mind. He knows the rat promised their safety, however the events from earlier still had Vash shaken, and if he suffered this bad how bad did they suffer?

Wolfwood faintly stirred, groaning as his eyes slowly opened, but Meryl remained unresponsive. Perhaps they weren’t sleeping, but unconscious. Vash turned his focus to a waking Wolfwood, who looked up at him blearily.

“Vash?...” Wolfwood rasped, his dark eyes scanning the cavernous room in a slight daze. “Yeah, it's me, how are you feeling Wolfwood?”

Wolfwood grimaced at Vash’s question, sighing slightly. “Like shit… My head is throbbing. What about you spikey? Make it out alright?... Actually. scratch that, how did we make it out?” Wolfwood sat up straighter, looking Vash up and down with all his bandages, Vash winces and then slightly moves to the side, relieving the figure that danced around behind him.

Wolfwood’s jaw dropped, “You’ve gotta be shitting me…”



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Wolfwood has seen a lot in his lifetime, being in the Eye of Michael introduces you to special freaks living among the ranks of humans, and non-humans. But this… this is new. Wolfwood has met Zazie, talked to Zazie, seen the freaky bugs they’re made of. But they always appeared as human.

Whatever stood behind Vash, swaying its tail and hips, humming as it rustled around in the dark, was something Wolfwood had never once seen in his life.

He turns back to Vash, the poor blonde looking pale and disheveled, his spiky hair all messed up under the bandages that neatly wrapped around his head. Vash smiled weakly at Wolfwood’s expression.

“Who the fuck is that.” Wolfwood whisper talked, pointing at the humanoid. Vash shrugged unhelpfully, seeming way to fucking calm about this. “Dunno, I just woke up and it was patching my wounds, I was honestly too shocked myself to ask many questions.”

The fucking idiot… Wolfwod groaned and dragged a hand down his face, great, just fantastic. The shifting movement allowed Wolfwood to realize that Meryl was resting on his shoulder after she started to slip off, Wolfwood caught her and leaned her up against the wall.

“We should probably get out of here soon, we don’t know who the hell that is and we shouldn’t wait to find out.” Wolfwood murmured to Vash, who made a thoughtful face then shrugged again. “I dunno Wolfwood, it seemed pretty peaceful, plus I think it was the one that saved us if it wasn’t any of you two.”

Oh he’s gotta be fucking joking. Behind them is a giant fucking… Rat creature thing, and Vash wants to trust it?! Rats are shifty as hell, fat fucking chance!!

“Vash we can’t trust it, fuck if it was nice, everyone can act nice if they need to!” Wolfwood snipped, and Vash sighed, his shoulders slumping, “No, Wolfwood, it's different-”

“If you doll’s would like to leave, I won’t stop you. The exit is right there and your stuff is sitting right by it, be sure to take your lady friend, though.” Both Wolfwood and Vash flinched as a voice spoke close to them, a tall figure looming over Vash who was crouched down.

“Although I highly doubt you’ll make it far, considering the brown haired one’s got a nasty ankle injury, and I only barely know how to care for humans. So I doubt anything I did could really help it. I was kind of hoping to get you to one of your species healers once the dust has settled.” Wolfwood looked up at the giant rat, who gazed at them with concern, its voice was gentle, a little squeaky, and had a slight posh accent to it.

It was right, though, while trying to carry Meryl to safety, Wolfwood slipped down the fucking steps and rolled his ankle bad. He’d protected Meryl with his body, but he’s pretty sure he hit his head a few times on the way down too, which explains why his head is throbbing like a bitch right now.

Vash turned to it and gave it a nervous fake smile. “R-Right, sorry… And thank you, for taking care of us.” He giggled, rubbing the back of his neck with his prosthetic arm. The rat reached down and gently patted his head, cooing softly.

“No need to apologize, you’re just trying to keep yourself safe, and I’m always happy to take care of you dears!” The rat soothed, then looked over and offered Wolfwood a complacent smile. Wolfwood scoffed and crossed his arms, looking away, he hated the warm creeping feeling of safety pouring off the being.

Next to him, Meryl shivered in her sleep, and all three of them perked up, the rats ears twitching in interest. Vash was the first to move, peeling off his jacket and placing it on top of Meryl, the rat nodded and then mumbled quietly to herself.

“Hm… It is probably chilly for you both… How about I make us some tea to warm us up?” The rat offered, and Wolfwood gave her an incredulous look, “There’s no fucking way you have tea of all things.” Wolfwood couldn’t believe it, a rat? A very humanoid rat, but a rat nonetheless just has a stash of one of the hardest commodities to get your hands on? 

“Indeed I do, come come! I’ve already got a fire going, I’ll just need to boil some water- Jeffery!! Can you get the kettle for me hun?” The rat quickly turned and called out for someone, and seconds later her request was returned by several tiny squeaks and the sound of dragging metal.

Vash and Wolfwood both gawked.

“Who the fuck are you?” Wolfwood sneered, pointing a finger at the rat. The rat turned back to Wolfwood, putting its hands up innocently, but offering a peaceful smile.

“You can just call me Malt, sweetheart. And you could consider me to be the mother of the rats.” The rat- Malt- introduced herself, leaving Wolfwood with more questions than answers. Wolfwood opened his mouth but Malt put a finger to her lips.

“In due time, child, ask your questions once we’ve settled for tea.” Malt said, Wolfwood glared at her, but kept his mouth closed. Malt walked over to him, crouched down, and then held out her arms. “May I pick you up?” she asked, tilting her head. Wolfwood nodded curtly, because he really ain’t moving anywhere otherwise. Malt slid her furry hands under his knees and snuck a hand behind his back, she took a deep breath and with a small grunt of effort lifting Wolfwood up into her arms.

For her slim build, Malt was deceivingly strong, carrying Wolfwood over to the fire effortlessly and setting him down close by. Meanwhile, a huge, and he means absolutely fucking massive, rat was dragging a metal tea kettle to the fire. Like it had to be at least 4 feet long, its fat little body honestly rivaling the kettle.

Malt chittered happily, walking over to the gargantuan rat and scooping up the kettle. She picked up the rat, gave it a kiss on the head, and then sent it off back into the dark unlit parts of the cave.

Malt fills the kettle with water, humming softly to herself. Vash settled himself next to Wolfwood, his arms full of Meryl who was huddled to his chest, probably for warmth since Vash is a living heater. Wolfwood would be lying if he didn’t say he was a little jealous, oh to be that small cuddled up under Vash’s coat with his head against Vash’s chest.

Wolfwood shook his head clear, looking back towards Malt who was setting up the kettle to heat over the fire, using a metal wrack so she didn’t have to set it on the flame directly. She took a seat on the opposite side of the fire, sitting crisscrossed, and then gently motions towards the 3.

“Right, ask away!” Malt said cheerfully, Vash and Wolfwood look between each other, because what is there not to ask? Vash turns back to Malt, his flesh hand gently rubbing Meryl’s back. 

“We know your name, but who are you specifically? Like… How do you exist, why?” Vash asked, starting off strong. Malt thought on his question for a while, humming and tapping her finger to her cheek.

“I exist to make sure my children have a fair existence on this planet, while not overrunning everyone else who lives here. I am their teacher, or some could see it as their mother. I'm also here to make sure the other species on this planet are playing fair, since they have a shared higher intelligence over my own babies.”

Is Malt aware of Zazie? How much does she know? 

Wolfwood cleared his throat and spoke up, “Sorry if this seems crass, Malt, but how old are you?” Wolfwood asked, and that earned him an elbow to the shoulder from Vash. Wolfwood hissed in pain, rubbing over the afflicted location and glaring at Vash.

Malt chuckled, a hand covering her mouth as she laughed, “Thousand of years my child, much longer than any of you humans have been here. I'm basically the Adam and Eve of my kin.” 

Wolfwood nodded, both satisfied and horrified by that answer. They're dealing with a being even older than Vash. And judging by her reference to the actual fucking bible, this being as a lot of knowledge.

“The other species you were talking about, you know they are a hivemind, have you spoken to it?” Vash asked, and Malt looked a little startled, blinking a few times and then tilting her head.

“Have you two spoken to it? Well, in any case, yes, me and Zazie get along peacefully. We aren't friends but we respect each other.” Malt answered despite her confusion, but it's clear to Wolfwood that Malt is very well informed, he wonders if that means she could be involved with Knives…

“Right… and how can we be absolutely sure you aren't some freak with a really specific fetish in a fursuit.” Wolfwood pressed, which got a barking laugh from Malt.

“Creative! But I assure you, this is very real flesh. Typically, I am just a rat, however, with the human population being adopted into my children's life, I need a way to communicate with them as well, so I developed a temporary vessel.” Malt pinched the skin on her arm and stretched it around, it moved like skin. Then she cut a small buck in her large ear with the tip of her nail, and blood oozed out. Shit, this is real.

Christ… this is absolutely insane.

“Oh, and…” Malt continued, “if I weren't, there wouldn't be hundreds of thousands of eyes watching you right now.” Malts voice trailed off as Vash and Wolfwood looked around in horror, and she wasn't lying. The walls were covered with beady black eyes, staring blankly from the abyss.

“That’s creepy as hell, Malt.” Wolfwood sneered, Malt giggled, “I know right? And I have to live with it!”

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

The tea kettle began to whistle loudly as the water boiled, all three of them jumped, and apparently so did Meryl since it startled her out of her sleep with a loud snort.

“Oh! Water’s ready!!” Malt cheers, grabbing the kettle.

However, her actions were interrupted by Meryl’s shrill screech.

“AHHHH!! WHAT THE HECK IS THAT?!?!? OH MY GOD EW EW EW EW EW!!!” Meryl threw the closest thing to her at Malt, which happened to be a rock. Meryl chucked the rock and it collided with Malts head, Malt let out a hiss of pain and her hand let go of the kettle, causing the contents to spill out and pouring scalding hot water right on Wolfwood.

“FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-”

Wolfwood never had to fight demons like he did resisting the urge to scream from the pain right then and there.

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Meryl is extremely thankful Malt is a patient being. Even as she’s carrying Wolfwood in a hurry to the nearest town because she just poured boiling water all over him.

Vash and Malt were both much taller than her, so while they were in a light jog, she was in a sprint. Malt had Wolfwood in bridal style in her arms, who was cursing every curse under the sun.

It was a good hour long sprint, and by the end of it Meryl was gasping and wheezing for air in the hospital. 

3 hours later and they were given the good news that Wolfwood would be fine, in pain for a few days but fine. Everyone sighed with relief, visiting Wolfwood in his room.

“Sorry Wolfwood…” Meryl murmured, her head low. Wolfwood rolled his eyes, “you owe me a drink for the next year for that stunt, short stack. And an apology to Malt who you called ugly”

Meryl pouted, hating he was right. Meryl turned around, opening her mouth to apologize, but found the spot that Malt had previously occupied to be empty…

“Well damn, nevermind I guess…” Wolfwood mumbled, Meryl deflated in defeat, and Vash gently rubbed her back in comfort.

“Go easy on her Wolfwood, you were scared seeing a humanoid rat too.”

Wolfwood sighed, nodding his head. “Yeah yeah… we’re all just damn lucky she’s a total pushover…”

“Nah, mom’s just have a lot of patience.” Vash jokes, giggling. Then his eyes catch something sitting on the window sill. It was a rat, waving its tiny paws goodbye. Vash gave it a shy wave, watching it jump off and out of sight. 

This land was full of untouched mysteries…..

“Spikey my fucking ass itches and I can’t move to itch it. Itch my ass for me or I'm going to go insane.” 

And it was also full of Wolfwood.