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Slamming his parents’ office door isn’t as satisfying as it should be, but Reo does it anyway, just to prove a point: he won’t silently accept this. How can his father call him childish, yet push for his marriage? It’s not the first time his parents have brought this up, but now, they’ve dared to move forward with choosing candidates. Just now, at the end of their weekly meeting, his father oh-so-casually told Reo to go through the stack of applicants that had been left on his desk, and have an answer by the end of the week.
Reo’s ensuing curses and door-slamming informed his parents just what he thought of that.
As Reo heads down the stairs from the top floor, he struggles to cool down. He had hoped that some light exercise would help him blow off some steam, but the endlessly winding steps are just pissing him off more. He undoes his blazer, loosens his tie, and re-ties his ponytail, but his blood is still boiling.
Fuck this, Reo thinks. Fuck this, fuck them, fuck everything.
If he could become a child again, he would stomp his feet, throw something to the ground. He would scream into a pillow, refuse to eat, threaten to run away—the entire gambit that he had only seen or read about, without ever putting it into practice. He and his parents, Reo reflects, must’ve lulled each other into complacency. Once Reo got a mind of his own, once his parents stopped giving him everything that he asked for, they didn’t know what to do with each other. Reo supposes there’s nothing stopping him from throwing one good tantrum now , not really, but even though he’s alone, he can’t bring himself to do anything but clench his fists. It’s already embarrassing enough that he lost his temper and slammed his parents’ door. Even if his temper is yet another gift from his father, he has yet to master the art of cool disappointment. His father can forsake him with a smile, but Reo’s had enough of smiling. If he has to bare his teeth, he’ll make it a known threat.
It’s exactly because of this, because of his so-called immaturity , his parents want to choose his future partner. His mother, as usual, claims that it’s what’s best for him, but Reo knows that it’s just one more puppet string that would be sewn into his skin.
Even if his parents married solely out of mutual interest and felt perfectly fine, Reo doesn’t want that. He wants infatuation, obsession, love. Mikage Reo has always been a storm, and for once, he wants to get lost in someone else. He’s been alone long enough, and even if he knows he’s capable of seizing the world on his own, why should he have to? He wants a partner. He wants someone to dream with.
(You still haven’t outgrown a thing like dreaming, his father’s voice whispers, and Reo can safely shout back in his head, I won’t, I won’t, I won’t.)
There’s only one person that Reo had been interested in like that, only one person who was so uniquely captivating: a diamond in the rough, a hidden treasure discovered in the dark.
(No, not past tense. Not when Nagi Seishiro still haunts the chambers of his heart, along with any quiet corners of Mikage Corporation. There’s no way that he’ll calm down if he thinks about Nagi, but he can’t help himself.)
Nagi had been in his final year at Hakuho High School when Reo had been in his first, but the stories about the Thousand Year Netaro had persisted long after Nagi’s graduation.
Just from the initial rumors, Reo had wanted to get to know him. After hearing that Nagi had a brief stint with the volleyball club, Reo had tried to recruit him for the soccer team. Nagi had been wholly uninterested; Reo had been charmed and frustrated alike. From what he had heard, Nagi had potential. He just needed someone like Reo to bring it out! While Nagi had indulged him by idly listening to his schemes, Reo could never get him to give in, and the Thousand Year Netaro slipped from his grasp.
Nobody had ever refused him so bluntly before. Nobody had ever been so intriguing. The impression that Nagi Seishiro left on him was as large as he was quiet, and it was only in Nagi’s absence that Reo realized just how much time he had sunk into chasing after him.
He had bribed Nagi into watching their practices and shopping for cleats, thinking that Nagi might get hyped up once he saw how fun soccer was. After slogging through a few drills, Nagi still thought that soccer would be a hassle, even if ‘hanging out with Reo wasn’t a pain.’
Reo doesn’t know when play soccer with me began to mean love me, like me, want me, but he only realized it when it was too late: Nagi graduated, and all Reo could do for the next three years was miss him. He had been able to take Hakuho to nationals and had even been scouted to play professionally, but just like Reo’s talents, his dream stalled at 99%. He never held the World Cup in his hands; he knew that there was only so far that he could go alone, but to graze the sun—only to fall into the ocean—damn near killed him.
Reo threw himself back into the rest of his life, into being a Mikage, and he’s sure that’s why his parents think they can pull this arranged marriage bullshit. But Reo still wants to live his life on his own terms, and that includes choosing his own partner.
(The one that he wants to call partner is so close yet so far.)
Truthfully, for Nagi to reappear at Mikage Corporation was a hell of a surprise. What’s unsurprising, though, is how he’s one of their best and worst workers. Though he turns in his work late—after extensive reminders—it’s always done well. Sure, there’s often careless errors here and there, which he’s always reprimanded for, but it’s never anything that can’t be fixed. Reo often finds himself intercepting Nagi’s work to correct it, even though he isn’t any of the infamous slacker’s direct supervisors. He just doesn’t want Nagi to be scolded as much, even if Nagi himself doesn’t care.
Somehow, Nagi’s lazy attitude is still endearing. Somehow, Reo still wants to be by his side.
Somehow, he hasn’t moved on.
Someone like Nagi would be an interesting partner, and one that would definitely piss his parents off. Biting down a vindictive smile as he makes his way down another flight of stairs towards his office, Reo’s so lost in thought that he doesn’t realize that he’s tripped until he’s in the air—but as suddenly as the world tilts, it also steadies, and Reo finds himself held tightly against a firm chest.
“Nagi?!” He hadn’t expected to manifest the man himself, but here he is: sleepily disheveled and hiding from his superiors as usual. Still refusing to wear a tie or do his work, but none of that matters as Reo looks into his eyes.
“Oh, it’s Reo…Hey, isn’t this familiar?” Nagi, Reo thinks, just might be smiling.
Reo had discovered Nagi’s talent in a stairwell not unlike this one, after all. The reminder puts an ache in his chest, one that only grows as Nagi sets him down. Sure, it’s an amusing coincidence, but Reo hates how the world never got to see that talent. Reo was never able to make it blossom, or to take Nagi to the top of the world with him.
Reo didn’t get to go there alone, either.
“Reo seems upset,” Nagi observes. His hands rest on Reo’s hips, as if Reo would fall as soon as he lets go. “Working too hard, boss? That’s not good.”
It’s none of your business. It’s nothing. It’s stupid.
“Better to have an easy life, right?” Reo aims for a playful tone, but his words come out far more wistful than expected. He bites his lip in regret, letting the pain ground him.
It’s a well-known fact, easily obtained by any interaction with Nagi—including his blunt interview with Mikage Corp—that he only dreams of naps and games. It’s what had put him at odds with Reo’s visions of soccer stardom. While Reo still stands by his own beliefs—that life should be seized with your own hands, that it shouldn’t be boring—he thinks that right now, Nagi must be happier than him.
“Yeah,” Nagi says. His dark gaze languidly roams over Reo’s expression with something like curiosity. “But that’s not what Reo thinks.”
An idea brushes against Reo’s periphery, and then, like the breaking of a dam, like the ensuing surge of floodwater, it bursts out of him. It feels so right, so perfect , that Reo barely stops to think it through.
“Why don’t you marry me?” Reo asks, grabbing Nagi’s shoulders and pulling him closer. “You won’t even have to work—I’ll take care of you—”
Nagi’s eyes widen slightly. “Me?”
“Yes, you,” Reo says, a laugh bubbling from his chest like champagne. “Who else would it be?”
“Huh,” Nagi says, and even if he doesn’t say it, his expression reads as hey, this is definitely familiar . “Sure.”
Reo somehow feels surprised, despite how earnestly he had made his request. Perhaps it’s clarity, logic, making its way through the storm that’s swept him up yet again. “Really?”
“Don’t back out now.” Nagi raises his eyebrows, a little furrow appearing in the middle. “Reo promised to take care of me, didn’t he?” He lets out an affected sigh, running a hand through his white hair. “Or does Reo say that to just anyone?”
“Of course not!” Reo bristles. “You’re special, Nagi.”
There’s that curiosity again, softening quicksilver eyes. Reo can almost hear the unspoken question on Nagi’s lips.
“I’ve always liked you,” Reo confesses, suddenly shy, but he doesn’t avert his gaze from Nagi’s. “I mean—I was interested in you, I wanted to know you, I—”
I wanted to be your friend. And then, more.
Even though Nagi had attended a university not too far from their high school, something had stopped Reo from reaching out. Something that, Reo now realizes, was the weight of his first and only love. A fascination, infatuation, obsession—something that threw him off balance, even while anchoring him, because oh , there was someone just like him.
Someone as alone as Reo felt.
At Nagi’s graduation, Reo had wanted to give him flowers. Wanted to say something. But Nagi had left immediately—no parents by his side, no friends to linger for and take pictures with. Reo remembers hoping that Nagi would have wanted to see him, but Nagi hadn’t spared the crowd a glance before he slunk off. Or maybe he had. It was hard to tell through the sea of students, and the ridiculously romantic part of Reo had hoped that maybe, just maybe, Nagi hadn’t seen him. And that if he had, things would’ve been different.
Still, in the end, it was Reo who hadn’t been able to summon the courage to chase after Nagi and give him a bouquet or a button. What if acknowledging Nagi’s loneliness intensified it? What if Nagi didn’t want his final memories at Hakuho to be spoiled by Reo’s overeagerness? He wasn’t someone that Reo had wanted to use for any mutual gain, and he had found himself at a loss of what to do when he couldn’t fall back onto the usual calculations.
Now, he ends up spilling bits and pieces of this to Nagi, whose eyes seem to become brighter and brighter. The night sky of his gaze fills with shining stars, and Reo thinks that he could make a wish on each and every one.
“I wasn’t really that lonely,” Nagi says, something like amusement tugging at his mouth. “You’re weird, Reo, you know that?”
“You’re just as weird!” Reo huffs.
Nagi hums, low and thoughtful. “That makes us a good match, boss.”
A flustering thrill runs up Reo’s spine, bringing him back from the nostalgia of the past. “Right—yes—well! We should celebrate, um—close the deal—”
Nagi perks up, clearly enticed by the idea of not working on company time, and Reo admittedly feels the same. Despite the impulsive nature of his offer, Reo plans to honor their commitment completely, so why not start now?
He leads Nagi to his office, their fingers brushing together as they walk. Once they’re safely inside, Reo thinks about holding Nagi’s hand properly, but pushes the urge aside—he can’t get too ahead of himself. Even if Nagi has agreed to his proposal, it’s not a guarantee that he feels the same as Reo does. While Reo wants a husband that he can love, there’s no real need for Nagi to return his feelings.
They’re entering a mutually beneficial partnership, that’s all. To exist beside each other is enough.
Reo busies himself with pouring sparkling champagne into two crystalline glasses while Nagi makes himself comfortable on a velvet couch of deep purple. Reo turns to find Nagi splayed across it, as if he’s about to fall asleep already, and bursts out into laughter. He approaches with mirth still painting his expression, nudging Nagi’s legs aside so that he can sit. Nagi takes the offered drink, and then promptly puts his feet back into Reo’s lap.
“Cheers, Nagi. Call me husband,” Reo says, clinking his glass against Nagi’s.
“I’d rather call you wife,” Nagi mumbles, more to himself than anything. When Reo raises his eyebrows, amused, Nagi flushes a light pink, hiding his blush with a hasty sip of champagne.
“Wife, huh?” Reo says. “Sure, whatever you want. As long as you’re mine, and I’m yours.”
Nagi flushes a little darker. Cute , he’s so cute. Reo can’t help but wink, stick his tongue out at him.
“Reo can call me husband too,” Nagi offers, gaze sideways and voice tinged with a small hope.
“I was planning on it,” Reo assures him, and it’s then that Nagi’s gaze brightens, turns back to him. “Only for you, Nagi, and none of these idiots.”
The pile of marriage candidates’ applications on his desk, now that he finally looks at it, is as high as a damn tower. Reo makes his way over to it with a scowl, fully intending to throw them out, but curiosity drives him to pick up the first one and open it.
He’s halfway through reading the man’s name when it’s suddenly plucked out of his hand; a shadow falls over him, and lips brush against his ear.
“Why’s Reo looking when he already has me?” Nagi asks. His voice is still low and sweet, but his gaze is much, much sharper.
“You don’t want to know the competition?” Reo reaches for the folder, fingertips brushing the corner, but—
“No,” Nagi says shortly, and tosses it.
Then, in a sudden flurry of movement, he sweeps the rest of the folders off of Reo’s desk as well, replacing the empty space with Reo himself. Reo’s eyes widen as Nagi closes in on him, bending Reo over until his back hits polished rosewood. Reo’s purple hair splays out like a violet halo, and his lips part in surprise—and then in anticipation—as Nagi sinks lower, only for him to collapse into the crook of Reo’s neck.
“I like you too, Reo,” Nagi says. “Since the day you asked me to play soccer with you, I’ve always liked you.”
“Nagi?” Reo manages unsteadily. He lifts a hand, threads his fingers through Nagi’s hair. The feeling of the coarse, wavy locks is grounding in the freefall of his shock, so overwhelming that he doesn’t know what else to do. “Are you serious?”
A nod, against his palm.
“Stay with me, Reo, until the end. If you really want to marry me, then it has to be a promise that you keep,” Nagi says, voice rough and muffled. His lips are at Reo’s pulse—can he feel how it jumps for him?
Something swoops low in Reo’s stomach, like a bird leading its flock in a nosedive. He takes a shuddering breath, wrapping his arms around Nagi’s broad shoulders and holding him closer. “I promise, Nagi.”
(Why would he do anything else, when this heart has always been for him?)
Nagi draws back, and Reo moves to cup his cheeks. Up close, Nagi’s eyes are even more lovely, almost multicolored in how they shimmer. He’s never seen Nagi look like this before.
Is it because of him?
Are Reo’s feelings really, truly requited?
The idea is beautiful—it’s terrifying —it’s—
—or is this Nagi doing all that he can to secure his easy life?
Yes, comfortable luxury is what Reo is offering him, and he doesn’t plan to back out, but he doesn’t need Nagi to pretend that he cares for Reo. That’s not why he had told Nagi how he had felt. Does Nagi think that he has to do this to close their deal?
Reo knows that he isn’t thinking straight. But the fear of playing into someone’s hands, of allowing a new master to pull his puppet strings, suddenly grabs him by the throat, and he can’t help but worry that he’s just made a mistake. Reality is sinking in now, to the echo of his parents’ taunts that he’s a child who doesn’t know what’s best for himself.
Nagi was supposed to be different. Nagi was supposed to be safe .
Please don’t make me want you more than I already do. Not if you’re just going to leave me behind.
“Am I why you’re here? At Mikage Corporation?” Reo asks.
Nagi tilts his head. He’s warm in Reo’s hands, in the shaking palms that have yet to let go; the world becomes warmer still when Nagi interlaces their fingers together.
“Yeah,” Nagi says. “Where else would I go?”
“Anywhere—”
“How would Reo notice me if I was somewhere else?” Nagi furrows his eyebrows. “Or fix my reports? Or trip over me in the stairwell…”
Nagi’s answer is so simple, so unexpectedly cute , that Reo can’t help but laugh. “You know about the reports?!”
“Mhm.”
“Then why do you keep making the same mistakes, idiot?! Isn’t my feedback thorough enough?!” Reo keeps laughing, and it’s like he gets lighter with each breath. “Really, Nagi!”
“It’s easier to let you fix it,” Nagi whines as Reo pinches his cheek. “Reooo, be my hero.”
“Yeah, yeah, sure.” Reo pinches Nagi one last time. “But why…” Why now, and not then? “Why didn’t you ever say you liked being with me? I never would’ve guessed.”
It’s not like Reo ever told him the depth of his feelings either, but that feels different. Nagi could’ve easily inferred from the constant chasing just how much Reo liked him, even if it was veiled by let’s play soccer!
He could’ve, right?
“You didn’t know?” Nagi draws back, brows furrowed again, mouth downturned, and Reo sits up.
“I never did get you to play soccer with me.” Reo lets out a rueful exhale. “I thought…”
He had thought he had been too much, or too little. He had been a coward. He hadn’t known how love could change him, and it had been as terrifying as it had been enthralling.
But Nagi’s here now, all over again, and this time, Reo won’t let him go.
“It doesn’t matter what I thought,” Reo finally says. “But Nagi, you really didn’t know how much I liked you?”
“You liked my trapping.” Nagi shrugs. It’s not an accusation, just a soft-spoken statement, but it stings like one. So…his affections weren’t as obvious as he had thought, and he hadn’t noticed Nagi’s feelings, either. Reo wilts at the realization: how long ago could they have had each other?
Could they have reached the top of the world?
“Don’t make that face, boss.” Nagi thumbs at Reo’s cheek. “Even if soccer was a hassle, being with you wasn’t.”
I wish it had been fun.
I wish I had changed your mind.
I wish, at the very least, that I had properly told you how I felt, and given you those flowers.
…Can I tell you now?
“Nagi,” Reo starts. Inhales, exhales. The edges of his high school confession had once felt weathered from how often he had practiced it, yet he barely remembers it now. “As much as I wanted to play soccer with you, I just wanted to be with you, too. Taking you shopping, eating lunch with you, biking you home…watching you play games, or sleep, listening to you talk—it made me so happy. I didn’t know what to do when you graduated, but then you came to Mikage Corporation, and I couldn’t believe my luck. I figured I should let you live your own way, leave you alone for once, until my parents told me to choose a partner, and the only person I wanted was still you—and you were right there , and I—how couldn’t I—”
The words that spill out of him may not be perfect, but they’re genuine. How can he explain that their partnership feels like fate? Nagi appears when Reo needs him the most, and even when they were apart, Reo took solace in the existence of someone like him, someone who treated him like Reo and not Mikage.
“Reo,” Nagi interrupts, “what if there’s someone better?”
“There’s no one better,” Reo immediately says. “Don’t say that, my treasure.”
“But Reo liked me so much and I didn’t…You said you needed me,” Nagi says, “to win the World Cup. And then...”
A wry smile tugs at Reo’s lips. “So you know, huh?” It’s surprising that Nagi followed the rise and fall of his soccer career; he can’t help but be touched, even if he’s a little mortified that Nagi knows of his failure.
“I thought you’d be fine,” Nagi says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t think you’d really need me. Even if you did, it was only for the World Cup, right? And that was the deal. It would be a pain to be in love with you and then be thrown out after—”
“In love with me?” Reo interrupts.
(Had he heard that right?)
“Yeah,” Nagi says. “In love with you.”
(Ah. He had.)
“And it would be a pain,” Reo repeats, “to be in love with me?”
“And thrown out,” Nagi finishes. “But if Reo really needs me again, and if Reo stays with me, all the way until the end, then it’s fine. Loving Reo is easy, and there’s nobody else who can do it like me.”
(In love with me, he’s in love with me, he loves me—)
Reo feels his lips pull into a smile, helplessly fond. God, he can’t remember when he smiled or laughed this much—but wasn’t it back in that first year of high school? “For a genius, you’re so fucking stupid.”
“Don’t laugh,” Nagi groans. “So are you.”
It takes a bit of shaking for Reo to stop laughing, Nagi damn near putting him into a headlock, but once he does, he takes a deep breath, wanting to address Nagi’s worry properly.
“Hey, I promised, didn’t I?” Reo says, soft and steady. “That I’ll be good to you. I’m not going to throw you away or find someone else.”
“Be good to me,” Nagi echos, just as soft, just as tender. “Take care of me, spoil me, don’t die before me.”
“What, are those your vows? You already can’t imagine life without me?” Reo means to tease, but his heart is pounding too hard to manage levity. Nagi’s wishes are as painfully sincere as they are strange, and Reo’s heart shouts yes, yes, yes, yes, at each one.
“Nope, don’t want to.” Nagi’s grip on him tightens, then relaxes. “We can play soccer again, too. For real, this time, even if it’s…”
Too late goes unspoken, but Reo’s made his peace with it. He’s had his time to grieve and build himself back up. Even if that dream fell, Mikage Reo is still standing.
“It’s a deal.” Reo smiles. “Take care of me too, husband.”
“Yes, boss.”
“What happened to calling me ‘wife’?” Reo teases.
Nagi parts his lips, closes them. Swallows. Tries again. “…Reo.”
Nagi’s flustered expression, slight as it is, makes Reo laugh all over again. Nagi pouts, mumbles out a my wife is being so mean to me that startles Reo into an admiring silence once he catches it.
It’s fun to see Nagi like this, flushed and unsure. Reo likes it—likes knowing that deep down, Nagi really is just like him. He wants to savor this expression: wants to take in the crease of Nagi’s forehead and the curve of his pout, memorize it even as he makes it happen again and again.
“Let’s get married, Nagi,” Reo says. “Right now.”
“Now?” Nagi blinks slowly, like a cat coming alive in sunlight. “Reo doesn’t want some big fancy wedding?”
“I don’t care, as long as I’m with you.” Reo shrugs, bright and careless. A big fancy wedding can always come later, but the marriage needs to come now. “Haven’t we waited long enough? Let’s put this plan in motion, Nagi, and take over the world!”
“Take over the world, huh…” Nagi lets out a breath that might be a laugh, and he squeezes Reo again, hands adoringly at his waist. “Reo’s still dragging me along…”
“Surely the business world isn’t as troublesome as soccer.” Reo grins. “You really think I’d restrict myself to just one domain? I’m going to have it all!”
Nagi affects a pout. “Reo can take over the world without me…Work hard, boss, and your trophy husband will welcome you home.”
Home. The word—and the image of it, soft and warm with Nagi—fills Reo with a feeling that he can only describe as a painful sort of happiness, one that steals his breath and seizes his heart.
This time, it’s Nagi who’ll wait for him. This time, Reo won’t hesitate to run into his arms.
This time, Reo will let Nagi Seishiro know just how much he loves him. He’ll start like this: by drawing him in, slow and careful, and asking oh-so-quietly, show your wife, then, just how you’d welcome him home. Nagi punctuates his words with a gentle kiss, his answer kindling a low heat in Reo’s stomach that sparks and bursts into a wildfire when sweet and gentle becomes rough and deep.
Reo would give Nagi everything that he wants right now, but at the same time, he can’t help but tease. He pushes at Nagi’s chest and says, “Hey, genius, make an honest man out of me first.”
A wink, a stuck out tongue; wide, dark eyes, a frantic nod; a ringing laugh, helplessly pulled from Reo’s throat as Nagi immediately lifts him into his arms, carrying him out the door like a bride over a threshold.
As he presses his face against Nagi’s pounding heartbeat, Reo thinks that the years that they lost are nothing compared to the lifetime that they’ve just gained. Forever is the deadline for this endless dream, the one that his childish heart had always hoped for, and this time, this time, Reo knows that they’ll be okay.
(This time, it’s a promise.)