Chapter Text
Ah, the Nightmare Realm.
A vast dimension of nothing. Squiggly lines and evil creatures, with vortexes that opened to whichever one universe one thought possible. Evil of course was a subjective term, and being a ‘Nightmare’ was the interdimensional equivalent of outcasts. Monsters and beings shunned by the rest of the cooler, more popular beings of the unknown world.
Though who was to say? Pyramid Steve never thought of being an outcast as a bad thing. He was beloved by those who mattered, and hated by those who didn’t. He’d been given this reputation of someone who rang to the beat of their own drum, and Steve was not any the wiser to it. Neither was he wise to his cousin’s unbridled hate and jealousy towards him. Luckily, that Bill Cipher had finally sought the therapy Steve so desperately encouraged him to take all those years ago. Bill even apologized for being mean! That was a once in a millennia milestone, and Steve couldn’t have been happier.
Steve was having another one of his average Nightmare Realms walks. At 79,200 Clicks sharp, he would enjoy the still air, pangs of self-aggrandization, and the wonderful fashion accessible only via a tether. Now, tethers weren’t all that unusual in the Nightmare Realm. He preferred that of a dimension where the only tethers were from a town. ‘Gravity Falls’, it was called. Tethers lead to a creature’s subconscious rather than a physical world, and Steve knew they could get overwhelming. He was more the indoorsy type anyway.
Though this one, specifically, he enjoyed. The strange mind of the human would come back often to the 1,970 or so rotations of his life. Sometimes there was nothing but a blank white. Other times, there was another man of the same face. Parents of his. Events, hitting others in the front fold with his extremities, or him sitting alone at a 4, maybe 5 seating machine crying with a funky hairstyle.
He readied his best tie and buffed his hat for the visit. Today would mark a new holiday for the man. He only knew as the human's mind threw such the extravagant event inside last year, one grander and happier than even his birthday. In fact, it was only recently birthdays took a turn for the better, now more quiet and uplifting. Whatever this meant for him, Steve could only hope it was for the longterm. It took a while to admit, but Steve had developed an empathy for the man. Empathy! That took him therapy to even learn about.
Steve sat in front of the tether, gift in hand. Not that the creature would remember in its wake, anyway. Pyramid Steve carried with him a baby Compsognathus, dressed to the nines with a party hat on top. He’d also strung a knife on its back using wires from an abandoned science project he once found when rifling the mind. Steve couldn’t hold the excitement in how he’d react. Maybe confetti? Brighter colors? A genuine, non-practiced smile?
Steve brushed the silly thought away. It took longer than it should have to even find what was once the human’s pet. He didn't find it in time for his birthday, hopefully now was still appropriate. It dated centuries ago– this human must be older than he thought.
Bwoeing.
Steve looked to the tether before him and found nothing, the unusual sound ringing across the place. He’s heard that happen to tethers before, but was never sure what it meant. Imagine a piece of rubber tugged at opposite ends, now at the brink of snapping. It kept going, too.
Bwoeing bwoeing.
He studied his surroundings to see if anyone was trying to access the tether alongside him. He couldn’t think of other reasons such a sound would even come out from.
Bwoeing. Fwshhh.
“Yeowch!” The loud, shrill sound was followed by a thump. Steve couldn’t fathom where its source could’ve even been, though as Compy squirmed under his hold he knew it couldn't have been from anyone good.
“Bloody hell!” Steve reacted to the air. There was the distinct smell of something burning, though he couldn’t be sure exactly from what. “Whatever you are, I suggest you keep away from this tether for at least for today.”
The voice clicked in Pyramid Steve’s head finally, pitch and all. “Who do you think you are, coming in and out of that mind like it's your front porch or whatever the Unilateral Kingdoms called it.”
“Mind control isn’t allowed in Theraprism, cousin. I ought to write you up.” Steve scolded.
The body of a hexagonal creature materialized before him. His red hand looked scorched. Whether there were tether rules he knew not of or the mind fighting back, he wasn’t sure. It likely had to do with that giant rift some time ago. “Here’s a thinker, you help me get in this guy and I’ll make your ex-wife think you’re dating a smokeshow. Deal?”
The dinosaur grew impatient, Bill’s body extending an arm to the triangle. “I’d love to Billie, but there’s an event I must rush in this mind for. Besides, this isn’t healthy. This tether clearly doesn’t want you– hey!”
Bill ignored his spiel, and instead reached to shake hands with his accented relative anyway. In shock, Steve let go of the animal. Compy ran straight for the red hexagon’s arm. Steve couldn’t tell if blood was drawn, but he wasn’t about to run that risk.
“Compy! Billie! Stranger’s body!” Steve pulled the dinosaur away from the body to no avail.
“Just let me shake your stupid hand! It won’t be long, it’s like I wasn’t even there!”
“What in blazes could you want so badly in that mind?” A huff and a kick later, the Compsognathus relented enough to be pulled. “I’m starting to think you shouldn’t be in there!”
Bill floated in shock for a bit, inspecting the body’s arm. Steve came closer to check on his family, only to be greeted with a tackle. “Good thing I’m ambidextrous!”
Pyramid Steve dodged him just in time, using Compy as a reptilian shield. The tether sparkled behind him. It caught Bill’s eye too, with how he instead gunned for the creature in Steve’s arms.
Steve had no choice but to jump in the tether. One second, he was browsing available tethers in Gravity Falls, and the second, he was right in the mind of the human again. Steve knew Bill was waiting eagerly at the other side, maybe trying to access the subconscious any way he could. He had to think fast.
The Compsognathus ran out of his arms and into the hallway, the mind currently in the form of its owner’s previous educational building. Four rooms to the right should be the classroom the human was incarcerated in. Steve saw Compy turn inside as a voice spilled from the tether.
“What the– it’s like this guy’s in love with you or something!” Bill shrieked, faint from the realm.
The mindscape shook slightly, just hearing the voice. “Billie, I have a feeling this one’s not fond of you. You’re going to have to stay outside. ”
The dinosaur lured the younger human’s equivalent to the scene. The dark circles underneath his eyes seemed to dig deeper at the sight of the triangle, the human's eyelashes batting in surprise. "Cut the cameras, what kind of sick joke is this? Why're you blue and fashionable?”
“Oh, I hear him in there!” Bill cooed. “Stanley Pi-ines~!”
Stanley’s face cringed. He’d carry Compy in his arms and pointed its blade to Pyramid Steve, stance squaring to center his mass. His frantic, frenzied movements came as cause for Steve's concern. “Who was that? Was that Bill? Aren’t you Bill?! Stanford, he’s here!”
Steve moved aside. “Hey, so– what am I saying, you can’t see that. Again, it’s Steven, yes, the posher of the Cipher clan. That’s Bill Cipher outside, yelling. I have a suspicion you disagree with him, and I’d hate to ruin your special day with such unruly party crashers! Whatever this day was!”
“I heard that!” Bill shot from the other side.
Stanley stood in place for a good few moments. Sometimes, it took a while for the gears to turn in the human’s head, and Steve never minded all the same. His aggression cooled to a slack of his shoulders and a lick to his face (courtesy of Compy). “Right. I just remembered who you were. And why’s this dinosaur have a party hat?”
Steve’s eye brightened. “It’s my special day gift! I’m sorry it’s not the same as if I got you something in your world. He even has a little blade atop, like your old pet!”
Stan regarded him with a blank stare, jaw ajar. “Doesn't that mean ya had to snoop my memories to find that out?”
“WHAT ARE YOU TWO HAVING A CORDIAL CONVERSATION ABOUT?!” Bill banged on the tether with all his might, spritz of blood seeping through.
The human groaned, throwing a punch to the space the voice came from. He angled wildly, though through pure luck or skill managed a hearty hit to the tether itself. Steve swore he heard his cousin wince in pain. Stanley smirked at the sound, energized. “Where's this guy, Triads? Pull him out, real quick. I just wanna say 1-2!”
Stanley jabbed straight at the space again, following quickly with a strong left hook. Puffs of smoke wafted in through the tether, burnt flesh and a hint of strawberry. Bill growled with an echo. “You barely made it the FIRST time, Stanley! You think it’d be that easy? I’ll make sure it’s quiet and it hurts for a long, long time. One day when Stevie’s down, I’ll take his body and come in here like a–”
Steve couldn’t hear the rest of the ramble over his disbelief. He believed, and genuinely he did, that therapy was doing much work for so short on Bill. How silly that was, that therapy was a long standing thing and topics like ‘boundaries’ took Steve at least decades to understand. Bill kept talking and talking still, and as Stanley argued with the nothing behind him Steve realized what he had to do.
Green flames enveloped Pyramid Steve’s retractable hands, shutting Stanley to silence. Even Compy winced, and Compy came from the depths of the dimensions Steve couldn’t even talk about. The mindscape rumbled, rattles of objects falling and rolling across the floor echoing the space.
Stanley watched the Pyramid in awe as he grew in size and arms, two more sets of them all as powered and fired. Bill kept talking still, and Steve was only more and more disillusioned of his cousin’s needs by the minute.
Steve took all his hands together to create a more concentrated heat. Before he sealed connection for good, he directed his eye at the tether for one quick quip.
“I’m a hundred percent sure you’ve done a terrible thing here. Please return to therapy.”
With that, he used the flame to seal the tether from the inside, forever locking Bill outside the man’s mind forever.
Stanley fell to his knees, shouting in pain with his hands to his head. Compy jumped into Steve’s arms as the world around him attempted to stabilize. Noises from outside the brain were spilling inside too, that especially of a gruffy old man. ‘Stanley? Stanley, what’s wrong? Talk to me?’
Steve came closer to the human, worried. “It-it should be temporary. You’ll be better for it, I promise you.”
“Ford, he’s in my head!” he screeched. It sounded like he ripped his vocal chords for that one.
Steve returned to his initial form. The world shook still, finding its place. Cracks erupted from where the tether was sealed, its space generating an anti-gravity field. Steve quickly protected the human in a hamster ball. “Who– who is Ford? Talk about what? What did Bill do?”
‘Bill?! He’s back?! Is he hurting you? What ca–”
“GET OUT!”
Pyramid Steve felt his body jerk out the mind. He didn’t know to where, just not here. He didn’t expect Stanley’s control over his own mind to be so strong after all this time. It was heartwarming, in a way, to have seen that growth in real time. It hadn’t even settled that he’d burnt away his ticket to the Nightmare Realm for the sake of protecting the mind he’d enjoyed so much to frequent. Huge chunks of debris cracked Stan’s ball, and with the flick of his finger it was reinforced with a layer of caramelized kernels. Safe– and that was all Steve needed to be sure of. With the tight hold on the dinosaur, Steve closed his eye.
Not like he was going to die. He was cousin to Bill, including the extent of his powers. He simply disliked the idea of being anywhere but the mind. Not like the Nightmare Realm was his home specifically. Stanley Pines’s head might be the one place closest to what he’d describe as home. He wasn’t sure what to expect with the sudden kick to his mind self. Did this mean he needed a new place to hang around in? Would he exist only in this dimension? Would he stay with Stanley’s real self?
“That’s ridiculous, Steven. Even for you.”
“Triangle!”
A smaller, male voice rang to the Brit. Compy jumped out of his hands.
“Everyone away, he’s got a knife and a dapper outfit!” A familiar voice rang. Not Stanley’s, but the gruffy old man’s. If Steve’s assumptions were correct, that must’ve been–
Steve opened his eye to a wooden veranda. Undamaged, of course. He was 2d in a 3d world after all, he was used to it. What he wasn’t were the tinier, more fragile editions of humans stood in front of him.
They all wore the hats too. Steve expected more guests for such an interesting man, but he figured they decided on a smaller celebration. Which was okay too, Steve would understand being selective with things like that. “Do you like him? Possums were much too feral for my tastes, and Compsognathus were much easier to train and–”
“HE’S FAKING AN ACCENT!” The small man shrieked, pointing his finger.
“HE’S GOT CONTACTS AND– matching blue legs? Ooh, I kinda like this look.” The small woman observed.
The gruff one spoke last, a firearm from the Cyberpunk dimension trained to Steve’s face. “Nice try, Bill! You must have forgotten about the Mystery Shack’s Nightmare barrier! You have no power here, and especially not over my brother!”
Steve turned to face that one, fixing his exquisite checkered tie. Beside him was a man of similar– actually, exact face. He was well dressed too, kept hair with glasses similar to the first one. Only he seemed to be coming to from an upset, a hand on his temple.
Steve saw confusion run across the groggy man’s face. He clicked his eye. “I knew he’d done a mess. Why else would a mind defend itself so vehemently? I didn’t even know it could burn select individuals, yet here we are.”
The reptile walked to the man with a headache, licking his face in the solid realm this time. He grumbled to his senses. “Stanford. He’s got me Compy in here. Knows it’s a big day for me.”
Everyone’s heads turned, slowly and extremely confusingly. Now that Steve thought about it, they all looked similar to each other. They even had the same dumb look in their faces when trying to process an infornation overload. This must have been his family!
Steve popped his retractable, blue arms, raining confetti, candies, and transcripts of everything Stan’s ex-wives have ever said about him post divorce / breakup within the limits of the barrier.
“Happy nonspecific event to my favorite mindscape! Where are my manners? I’m Steven P. Cipher, cheers,” he took his bowler hat and placed it over his chest with a bow, “and I believe you have problems with my cousin I’m yet to be aware of.”