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“Why are we even doing this?”
“Because Shizun asked me. I don’t know why you’re here.”
“Because he asked me as well.”
If you’d asked Shen Yuan what he’d do if he ever transmigrated into someone else’s body, he never would have said this. As Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge bickered as usual, he used his fan to cover the scowl on his face. His glare at Shang Qinghua, however, was not hidden.
The former author tried his best not to shrink away from the numerous deadly glares pointed in his direction. Contrary to popular belief, he was not the one to blame here. He was also a victim! Who would have thought that when he was transmigrated into his own novel, he’d become a slave to The System, the very thing that came from his own plot! He didn’t want to do this as much as everyone else in the room, but he unfortunately knew they could never really ignore The System. They simply had to accept their miserable fate.
Shang Qinghua looked at Shen Qingqiu with pleading eyes, hoping his Cucumber Bro of all people would understand him. Surely he too would understand their powerlessness to The System! Alas, he was only met with cold, angry eyes. He turned his attention back to the icey demon who wouldn’t stay more than two steps away from him at a time. He’d just have to make this work somehow.
Shen Qingqiu was rather aware of their relationship with The System. He had fallen headfirst in the BL trap it had created for Airplane Bro’s unsalvageable harem novel. He was even aware Shang Qinghua had no control over this. The two had both received a notification from The System. They’d discussed it, planned it, and executed it together. He was still mad at the An Ding Peak Lord. He didn’t care. If Airplane hadn’t written that stupid book and gotten them transmigrated here upon their deaths, then they never would have been in this situation in the first process.
「Complete one of the following tasks to celebrate Halloween:
- Carve pumpkins (with at least 6 people)
- Throw a costume party (with at least 10 people)
- Go trick or treating (with at least 2 people)」
When Shen Qingqiu woke one morning to this message, his first thought had been to panic. His second thought had been to go and strangle Shang Qinghua. Seeing as the first option didn’t exactly fit his flawless Shen Qingqiu persona, he opted for the latter; however, upon arrival at An Ding Peak, he found his comrade stressing out over far more than his usual work.
He had, graciously, decided to keep his hands away from the man’s neck just this once. Once he had successfully come up with a task to keep Luo Binghe occupied for a few minutes, the two began to discuss their plans to get out of the situation. Only, when they’d just begun to discuss it, another message from The System came.
「Failure to complete will result in certain losses of privilege.」
The System existed only to make them suffer.
The third option seemed, by far, the easiest, but unlike someone, Shen Qinggiu was not willing to sacrifice his dignity. Yes, it would only take the two of them to complete, but that meant embarrassing themselves and walking up to their fellow sect members and saying trick or treat. They’d only naturally have to explain what that phrase and their activity meant, which was basically a big flag saying “I’m not from here!”
No, that one had been ruled out quickly. The second one was a little more plausible. Tell people to dress up as something and invite them over. They could play that off a lot easier. The main problem with that was Shang Qinghua’s insistence that the budget could not afford it. Not only would they need to host a party—payments and preparations all done by An Ding Peak—but every member of the sect would need a costume. Seeing as everything was managed by An Ding Peak, that meant the money for those costumes—and likely the sourcing and making of them too—would be done by the Peak Lord and his disciples. In the end, Shang Qinghua had convinced his friend that it would be very embarrassing to dress in costumes and explain it all to their fellow sect members.
That left one option. Carving pumpkins. While this wasn’t the weirdest thing to explain to whoever they coerced into the event, it was odd enough that they’d received weird looks. They also needed at least six people to complete the task. How would they convince six people to join them for this random activity?
They’d convinced six people.
While Shang Qinghua took care of the taxing preparations—something about finding pumpkins and not just gourds or The System may not recognize it—it had become Shen Qingqui’s task to gather the participants. He already had two with him and his friend, and Luo Binghe was sure to come even if he hadn’t asked, so that meant there were three people already. Luo Binghe assured him that Mobei-jun would attend as well—though he didn’t know why the boy knew that—which meant he only had two more people to acquire.
At first, he’d intended to ask two of his most loyal disciples, Ning Yinying and Ming Fan to join, seeing as they’d almost never turn down a request from him, but he soon got rid of the idea. Something about them coming felt far more embarrassing than some alternative. On a whim, he’d asked Liu Qingge the next time he saw the man.
His fellow Peak Lord had, surprisingly, nodded at his invitation before leaving the monster he’d caught behind. Shen Qingqiu had gotten closer to Liu Qingge than the two were in the novel, but he was rather shocked at the instant favorable reply. The person on Cang Qiong Mountain that he was most comfortable with was Yue Qingyuan, but he’d almost rather fail the mission than ask that man to join them. Asking his boss to join him and some others for pumpkin carving was far more embarrassing than asking one of his disciples. So, he’d gone and asked someone he felt would neither judge nor cause waves at their very odd gathering, Mu Qingfang.
He was not very close to the Qian Cao Peak Lord, but the two had an amicable relationship. Furthermore, the man could be quite the academic, so a new activity such as this may actually be interesting to him. Most of all, he didn’t think the presence of two demons at their little get together would worry him too much. He definitely didn’t choose him just in case someone injured themself in the process, or well, someone else.
The two transmigrators had taken their sweet time planning the thing. They did, after all, not wish to take part in it. They justified it by saying these things took time. They needed to source materials, plan a date, make sure everyone could attend, decide where it would be held, and all sorts of other things. The System had bought it, for a little while at least.
「Time remaining until punishment for failure is delivered: 3 Days.」
Needless to say, the two panicked and quickly completed what they had not yet finished. Two days later, their group was gathered, 6 pumpkins had been acquired, and tools that would hopefully only be used on pumpkins had been divvied out.
Their set was—considering what they were meant to do—was rather formal. Shen Qingqiu wasn’t sure if this was because the people who attended knew nothing of the activity or because in fear of his many attending superiors, Shang Qinghua had set everything up like a banquet.
The pumpkins he had acquired were, luckily, of decent size, and the Peak lord had been able to procure various sized knives and spoons with which they’d use to carve. Considering this world was not equipped for pumpkin carving parties and Shang Qinghua had done this all rather last minute, the results were surprisingly effective.
“Ahem.” Shang Qinghua cleared his throat, trying to gain everyone’s attention.
No one responded.
“Ahem.” He cleared his throat a little louder, this time clapping his hands as well.
He’d gained the attention of Mobei-jun, Mu Qingfang and Shen Qingqiu, but unfortunately the other two were too focused on their bickering to notice the hamster-like man ready to grovel at their feet. Shen Qingqiu snapped his fan closed and rested it on his lap. Everyone went silent. His Airplane Bro gave him a cheesy thankful expression.
“We’ll begin now that everyone is here and ready.”
Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge still shot each other looks of discontent, so it was hard to tell if they were even listening. Luckily, Mu Qingfang had been the best possible choice for a sixth person.
“Shang-xixong, could you explain exactly what this tradition we’ll be doing today is?”
Shang Qinghua shot Shen Qingqiu an incredulous look. Shen QIngqiu conveniently didn’t see it —although unfortunately for his friend, Luo Binghe had. Shang Qinghua quickly forced a smile on his face, turning all his attention to Mu Qingfang.
“I wouldn’t exactly say it’s a tradition—”
“That’s what Shen-xixiong told me when he invited me. He said it was a tradition in a far off place he’d discovered on his travels.”
Shen Qingqiu could practically hear his friend screaming at him. He wouldn’t dare send another look his way, because Luo Binghe’s sharp glare was fixed on him, daring him to give another bad look to his precious shizun.
“Well, I suppose it’s true that they do something similar in a different land, but half of this idea was actually thought up by Shen Qingqiu himself, who thought it would be a lovely bonding exercise to bring everyone here closer together.” If he couldn’t glare at him, he’d simply have to blame him when the other man could say nothing about it.
Mu Qingfang nodded thoughtfully, appearing genuinely touched by those words. Mobei-jun and Liu Qingge both lacked any distinctive expression. She Qingqiu was obviously upset by his friend’s words but could say nothing about it. Luo Binghe had finally stopped glaring at Shang Qinghua, instead staring at his shizun like a love struck puppy—he’d seemingly chosen to believe this was for the two of them alone. Shang Qinghua was fine with that.
“You see, in the far off land, they’d cut open their pumpkins—a rather specific kind of gourd—and take the seeds out so they could replant them for the next year. It’s a tradition to…celebrate their harvests!”
“After scooping out the seeds, they’d cut up and use the pumpkin as a vegetable in many of their foods. It’s actually quite delicious.” Shen Qingqiu added.
Luo Binghe looked far too eager to slice the pumpkin open, likely already forming delicious recipes for his precious shizun in that twisted little head of his.
“I see, it’s a gourd. Do these pumpkins have similar medicinal properties to the gourds we have here, then?”
Shang Qinghua nodded. “I do not know but hey, why wouldn’t they? They’re the same scientific family after all!”
Everyone looked at him a little confused. The man quickly began to stumble over his words, trying to redirect everyone’s attention.
“And the seeds are edible too!” Was the first full sentence he managed not to fumble.
“The seeds?” Liu Qingge inquired, looking suspiciously at the pumpkin before him.
“Uh, yes! You just, uh, roast them a little and add a little salt and bam! A tasty little snack—but that doesn’t matter! How about Shen Qingqiu explains his addition to this tradition?”
Of course the man would throw attention his way to take people’s attention away from his one man circus act. Although he was not thrilled by this prospect, he began to explain their task.
“Dried gourds are commonly used as lanterns, so I thought it may be fun to carve fun shapes into these larger, fresher gourds, and use them as lanterns. It would be a good bonding exercise and placing them around the mountain could cheer the disciples up.”
“Any discarded pieces can, of course, be given to you for research Mu-shidi or to the kitchen to use for meals. It would be such a waste to just throw them away!”
Shen Qingqiu could practically see tears leaving Shang Qinghua’s eyes as the man thought about the poor poor money he’d had to spend to acquire such undoubtedly rare items.
“What a splendid idea! So we are to choose a design that would best bring joy to our lovely sect?” The two slaves of The System nodded. “Then how should we begin?”
Shang Qinghua stepped forward, holding up the tools he’d prepared and explaining their uses. Once his explanation was done, everyone was to start cutting the top of their pumpkin off. Before Shen Qingiu could even lift a finger, Luo Binghe was behind him and wrapping his arms around him to grab the knife. And so, Shen Qingqiu sat, fan in front of his face, as Luo Binghe happily carved the top of his pumpkin for him.
Liu Qingge, who had likely not been paying attention to the directions, stood up and with a single movement unsheathed his sword and sliced the whole top of the pumpkin off.
“Ah, Liu-shidi, you were only supposed to cut part of the top out.”
Liu Qingge looked from Shen Qingqiu to the top of his pumpkin, which lay sadly on the floor. He continued to stare at it.
Mu Qingfang was cutting the top of his pumpkin off with impressive precision, possibly due to the…variety of injuries he’d had to tend to with sharp objects. In the way that Luo Binghe coddled his shizun, Shang Qinghua was fussing over Mobei-jun. The demon was extremely capable and Luo Binghe’s right hand man for a reason, and yet, it seemed he was utterly incapable when it came to opening a pumpkin. The freezing stares he sent Shang Qinghua’s way were, surprisingly, ignored as the man instructed the demon on the best technique to cut his pumpkin.
“Luo Binghe, you need to cut your own pumpkin.”
“But, Shizun—”
Shen Qingqiu shooed the younger man away, insisting he could cut the rest by himself. Shang Qinghua, who was watching Mobei-jun cut his pumpkin painfully slow, glanced at the rest of their crew, curious to see where everyone was at.
Shen Qingqiu and Mu Qingfang had, as expected, finished and were patiently discussing the next step. Liu Qingge, who had picked up the top of his pumpkin and placed it on top of the bottom half, was, also as expected, done. Luo Binghe had started late, but now that his shizun’s eyes were focused elsewhere, he was cutting into the pumpkin with a bloodlust Shang Qinghua wished he had never seen. He slowly turned his attention back to Mobei-jun, whose brow was creased as he carefully finished cutting a lid for his pumpkin.
Noticing everyone was done, Shang Qinghua gathered their attention to make sure everyone was comfortable moving onto the next step.
“Now that everyone is done, you can take the top off and set it to the side. Remember, we’re going to use them later. Grab your spoon and get to digging its guts out!”
Shang Qinghua was not looking when the others gave him horrified looks at his phrasing. Mu Qingfang was, surprisingly, the only one who did not appear disturbed. Shang Qinghua dove right into his pumpkin, having only pushed his sleeves up enough so he could reach in. What he had not accounted for in his plans was the impractical nature of some attendee’s sleeves. Luckily for Shen Qingqiu, Luo Binghe was once again ready to jump at his beloved’s feet. This time, Shen Qingqiu had no protests, for the cleaning of the pumpkin had never been his favorite party anyways.
Mu Qingfang had come prepared so that he could tie his sleeves back quickly and get to work—likely a habit formed from his many years as the sect’s main doctor. Liu Qingge, like Shang Qinghua, wore more practical garments, being one of the few peak lords who was always out fighting. He was able to reach into his pumpkin with ease, considering how he’d cut the top off, and much like Mu Qingfang, he was undisturbed by the slightly graphic imagery of the pumpkin guts. After all, the two had likely seen a similar amount of innards in their lifetimes.
Shang Qinghua looked up from his pumpkin to see Mobei-jun once again intensely focused on cleaning out the inside of the pumpkin. He had not expected the man to be such a perfectionist with pumpkin carving, especially considering how he was no perfectionist when it came to most other things. His sleeves had been rather haphazardly rolled up and he did not care for how dirty they were getting with his movements.
“Once it’s clean enough for you, you can wipe off your hands and start carving something into the pumpkin!”
Shang Qinghua was actually getting a little excited. HE saw a message. His mood instantly dampened.
「See? It’s not so bad, is it?」
“Shut up,” he whispered, gaining a curious look from the demon next to him.
Everyone continued to clean and carve their pumpkins, each taking a very different approach. Mu Qingfang spent more time than anyone cleaning out the inside of his pumpkin. Shen Qingqiu waited until Binghe backed away, his work done, to start carving his design. Liu Qingge stared at his pumpkin for way too long before realizing he needed to carve something instead of spending all his time deciding what. Luo Binghe once again, ripped the guts from his pumpkin with speed and blood lust Shang Qinghua did not want to witness. Mobei-jun took his time, but was all around doing well considering he’d never done such a thing before. Shang Qinghua, a tried and true expert, went to town making his pumpkin the best he could. He’d be really distraught if his experience—which he’d learned he had far more of than Cucumber Bro—didn’t land him the best jack-o-lantern in the group.
About an hour had passed since they began gutting their pumpkins, and almost everyone was done. Mobei-jun was putting on his finishing touches, and Luo Binghe had rushed over to help Shen Qingqiu complete his now that his own pumpkin was done. Shang Qinghua had just finished his own pumpkin and, not to toot his own horn or anything, he’d produced the best pumpkin he’d ever done in his, now, decades of life. This meant, it was time for the big reveal.
Everyone was given a candle to place in their pumpkin before they put the lids back on. They were all going to turn their pumpkins around at once and see what everyone created.
“On the count of three, everyone turn your pumpkins. One. Two. Three!”
At Shang Qinghua’s words, everyone turned their pumpkins around so the group could see their work.
Liu Qingge’s pumpkin was, unfortunately, almost mutilated like he’d been hunting it down. Upon first glance, the design was illegible. It looked like he’d just hacked and slashed the pumpkin until enough light would come through. Upon closer inspection, Shen Qingqiu’s eyes lit up.
“Did you write jaiyau? Are you trying to encourage the disciples?”
A small flush was on Liu Qingge’s face as he nodded. Suddenly, his pumpkin didn’t look quite as barbaric—although it was still a far cry from a cute pumpkin to cheer his disciples on. Next, eyes turned to Luo Binghe’s pumpkin, although the man quickly turned attention to Shen Qingqiu’s pumpkin instead. Considering the Peak Lord’s reputation as a proper and haughty man, his carving was rather…childish.
Shang Qinghua immediately recognized it to be a classic face for a jack-o-lantern but that didn’t mean he still didn’t want to laugh at it. The smile was a bit crooked and the eyes were slightly different sizes. Overall, he didn’t think it would translate as well to the people in this world as it did to him. As Shang Qinghua held back his laugh, Shen Qingqiu’s fan was once again raised to his face, likely to hide the blush on it—although he blushed for a very different reason than Liu Qingge.
“I think it’s wonderful, Shen-xixong.” This only made the man blush harder.
Seeing as Luo Binghe was too busy hyping up his shizun’s pumpkin and thus blocking his own, the group moved their attention to Mu Qingfang’s. Much like Liu Qingge, he’d taken to writing a phrase of encouragement on his pumpkin. Unlike the former, he’d carved the symbols with scary precision, making the phrase instantly legible. He’d even taken some time to add a few small dots around the rest of the pumpkin so the whole piece was decorated.
“It seems Liu-xixong and I had the same idea.” No one dared comment.
Attention now turned to Mobei-jun’s pumpkin which, while not as perfect or refined as some of the others, was rather impressive for his first carved pumpkin. Unfortunately, a demon’s opinions on what was motivating was far different than a human's. Shang Qinghua wasn’t sure exactly how Mobei-jun had successfully instilled the power creating fear into the pumpkin’s piercing snarl, but he had somehow done it. Shang Qinghua regretted helping him so much. Maybe if he hadn’t helped, he wouldn’t have to see jak-o-lantern so terrifying it would haunt his dreams.
“I think that’d be a good pumpkin to bring back home for your underlings.” Shang Qinghua laughed out, desperately hoping the demon didn’t insist on it staying at the mountain like everyone else’s. “Maybe Luo Binghe can also bring his back to the demon realm.”
At the mention of his pumpkin, Luo Binghe immediately gestured to what would, undoubtedly, be referred to as his finest masterpiece. Luo Binghe was, unfortunately, painfully good at every single thing he tried, which meant that even though he’d never once carved a pumpkin before, his work looked like that of the most skilled professional. On the front of his pumpkin was an impeccable portrait of the man next to him, his shizun Shen Qingqiu.
Shang Qinghua had been utterly defeated. Why had he even dared to think his skills could go against that of the protagonist’s? He’d never even had a chance! As he wallowed in his misery, everyone else looked at the pumpkin in awe. It was an absolute masterpiece. Shen Qingqiu, however, was embarrassed yet again.
“Your cooking skills must have really helped you.” The man spoke form behind his fan, voice wavering only slightly.
“Yes! Do you like it, Shizun?”
“Ah yes, it’s rather,” Shen Qingqiu’s voice cracked, “detailed.”
“I think this marvelous creation will certainly cheer up Qing Jing Peak’s disciples when their beloved shizun is away.” It seemed Mu Qingfang was also rather impressed by Luo Binghe’s work.
The man’s compliment, however, was not appreciated. Luo Binghe did not hesitate to glare at the Peak Lord whom he’d never previously had a quarrel with. He assumed a defensive position, covering pumpkin Shen Qingqiu’s face.
“Why would I leave it here?”
Mu Qingfang stuttered, at a loss for an explanation. “Ah, well, that, uh, was the purpose of this—”
Luo Binghe’s eyes narrowed. As he moped over his loss, Shang Qinghua felt a hard smack to the top of his head. He looked up, instantly noticing Shen Qingqiu had “accidentally” let his fan slip from his fingers as he was sandwiched between Luo Binghe and Mu Qingfang. Shang Qinghua immediately jumped into action, ready to do what he did best: bullshit.
“Well, why would you need it Lu—” He flinched as the demon's glare turned to him. “I mean why would you need such a thing oh powerful and strong and unbeatable and amazing demon lord Luo Binghe, when you have the real thing right next to you at all times? Unlike the pumpkin which’s beauty will fade away, the beauty of your beloved Shizun never shall! Why not take a little pity on the poor disciples of Qing Jing peak? Surely precious yingying would like to see the wonderful visage of her Peak Lord from time to time, wouldn’t she?”
Luo Binghe’s gaze was no longer as deadly as he contemplated Shang Qinghua’s words. Shen Qingqiu looked like he wanted to curl up in a corner and die of embarrassment, but this is what he deserved for trying to get Shang Qinghua of all people to clean up his mess. Fortunately, Shang Qinghua’s words seemed to work, for Luo Binghe no longer appeared as threatening. Both Mu Qingfang and Shang Qinghua relaxed.
“Well, shall we go place them around the mountain, then?” Mu Qingfang suggested, ever the good-natured peacemaker.
“Let’s put ours next to each other, Shizun!” Luo Binghe’s anger had disappeared just as quickly as it came as he reverted to his usual puppy disciple mode.
Liu Qingge began to follow the duo with his own pumpkin, but before Shen Qingqiu could say anything, Luo Binghe already turned to glare at the man.
“Qing Jing Peak doesn’t need more than two pumpkin lanterns.”
“Then you can put yours elsewhere.”
“Why would I put Shizun’s face anywhere else?” Luo Binghe shouted.
“The Bai Zhan Peak disciples are fond of him as well. You can put it there.”
“I’d never put Shizun on your peak!”
“Now, now,” Mu Qingfang stepped forward, trying his best to complete this party without treating any injuries, “I’m sure your disciples would love to see your encouraging words, Liu-xixong. Why don’t we put it there together? You can even help me decide where to put mine after.”
No one could argue with that logic. The four set off, their pumpkins in tow. Shang Qinghua had, once again, begun to wallow in his misery. Not only was his pumpkin not the best, but it had been entirely forgotten about! Everyone had left before he even had time to remind them no one had looked at his! How foolish he felt! What an utter waste of time and energy! If he’d have known this would happen, he would have carved some stupid face like Cucumber Bro!
Then again, Mobei-jun hadn’t left with the others. He was still standing next to Shang Qinghua, looking at the man who had lowered his head in shame. Gaining a new wind of strength, Shang Qinghua turned his pumpkin towards Mobei-jun, proud and ready for praise.
“What do you think?”
Mobei-jun was silent.
“My King?”
He’d put all of his artistic effort—which was not much when it came to this type of art—into creating a beautiful mountain scenery reminiscent of Cang Qiong Mountain. It was, indeed, his finest work. He’d done an excellent job differentiating parts by fully carving some parts and shaving away layers of the pumpkin on other parts. It was undeniably beautiful.
“It’s ugly.” Mobei-jun’s expression was more ruthless than normal.
Those two words were enough to melt Shang Qinghua into a crying mess on the floor. Why had he ever thought Mobei-jun of all people would compliment him? The man’s personality was as icy as his powers. After a few minutes, the demon plucked him off the ground and set him on his feet again. Having fully accepted his humiliating defeat, Shang Qinghua picked up his pumpkin, his dejection written all over his face.
“Let’s head to Qiong Ding Peak to give them my pumpkin.” Shang Qinghua, even in his depression, was ever the brown-noser. “Afterwards, we can figure out where to put your pumpkin back at your estate.”
“No.”
“What do you mean no—I mean of course, My King, what ever did you have in mind?”
“I’ll leave it here.”
“Here? On the Cang Qiong Sect’s mountain?” He couldn’t believe it; what had this world come to?
Mobei-jun nodded. Shang Qinghua hadn’t thought the pumpkin carving party would end up being this difficult. The two of them left with their pumpkins, heading first to Qiong Ding Peak before going wherever Mobei-jun wanted to put his pumpkin.
Shang Qinghua sat at his desk, completely and totally exhausted. They’d successfully completed The System’s task seeing as no punishment had been given. That alone was a great prize, but after all the effort and money he’d put into this stupid project, Shang Qinghua had wished for a little more.
“Hey,” he started, slumping back in his chair, “don’t we get a reward for completing the task?”
Within moments, The System replied.
「Isn’t the pumpkin enough?」
Shang Qinghua’s eyes went to the terrifying jack-o-lantern that had been placed in his office. It truly was horrifying and he was no longer tortured by it only in his dreams. Was this Mobei-jun’s reminder of his place? Had he been upset at having to take part in such a ridiculous event?
“Oh shut up, I won’t be able to get rid of that thing fast enough.”
「Now creating a task to preserve the pumpkin…」
“NO!”