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Passion drives someone to choose a path, but apparently our path was just too far for us to reach. Everyone has this fire within them, sometimes it just burns to bright almost blinding. Passion now just looks like a double-edged sword, you either get hurt or not. But taking a risk has always been a challenge to be overcome by an individual only that it's rare for someone to take a leap for it.
An enclosed area surrounding new faces and familiar ones as well, but even though she is acquainted she felt like a stranger, a stranger to whatever they were talking about and laughing about, in the gymnasium which she first set foot again for the past ten years. Now she hears echoes of people cheering and shoes spiking the shiny floor.
(Ah I shouldn't have come to this reunion what was I thinking!!!) She thought, as her hand began to form a fist almost digging her nails to deep.
As she was lost in her thought, too lost to even notice that her previous coach was talking to her. The man then raised a hand and passed it over in front of her face to knock her out of daze, and she flinched.
"(L/N), so good to see you back here in Shiratorizawa's gym." The man beside her placed his hand over her shoulder and gave a slight grip.
"Ah, yeah. It's been a while..." Looking over her shoulder, a toothy grin from the coach was a rare sight to see, and likewise, she put up a courage to smile.
The smile she puts up is just a mere facade, even though in the room filled with all these people she is acquainted with, all she feels was the empty void eating her up.
"I bet you missed being here, your junior managers missed you all to fast when you graduated." With an encouraging pat on the back, she felt a slight tugging which caused a throbbing feeling in her chest.
"Yeah..."
Shiratorizawa's tacttian manager. She was known to have good strategies and tactics on the field. That is why the coach admires her so much and was thankful that she accepted Shiratorizawa to be in terms since she was quite popular to be the brains for the braun.
"Tendou-san!"
(Ah.)
They met each other by eyes, it's been years since they saw each other, she didn't actually expect for Tendou to show up since she knows that he was busy in some other country.
(Satori...)
Tendou gets past her, and goes to Ushijima's side together with the others. It left a pang on her chest to be ignored just like that by the man she once knew that would always be head over heels for her. But it seems like time changed him, and the distance between them years ago just got even farther apart.
(Ah, he ignored me ...how many times has this been going on...it feels endless...)
Flashback, ten years ago.
"I'll study pastry abroad." Tendou says proudly.
"Isn't that way too far?"
"I'll follow my passion, what about you? Do you want to do the same?" He replies.
End of flashback.
(What a memory to remember...)
After that short flashback she felt as if she was going to cry her eyes out, so she decided to step out for a minute. The breeze of the cold night air made her feel nostalgic at the times where she used to wait for Tendou's practice with the others.
Trees rustling caused by the wind were her go to calm noise, but she couldn't help but feel sad, because here in this place was filled with memories she kept close to her heart with him she felt as if everything was fine but right now, she is steps away from falling down to her knees.
(It's cold...)
"You shouldn't stay out here too long, nights here are colder than you think." Tendou pops out behind her.
"Satori..."
"Hmm, you called me by my first name..."
(Huh...?)
"Do I know you perhaps?"
(Did he just ask me if I know who he is?)
It didn't take too long for the people inside the gym to realize that the both of them were gone, only to find them outside but the catch here now is that she looked like she's been torn down into pieces. She looks devastated, even the stoic Ushijima knew that at a gaze.
But this didn't let her to go home in an instant, she sat there the whole party putting up a smile on her face despite feeling the opposite. The room filled with laughter and cheer made her heart throb, as she sees across the room, Tendou. Smiling, bursts into laughter and having a good time.
(He clearly doesn't remember me...and does the others know this...are they fucking kidding me right now?)
"Ushijima, we have to talk."
"(Y/N), tonight is not the time to talk about it, I know what you're going to tell me."
"I said, let's talk. And the third time I repeat those words I'll drag your ass with me. Whether you like it, or not."
She is desperate, the feeling inside her is anger but not quite, it was only shadowing what she really feels, sadness.
After pursuing, or we can say threatening Ushijima into having a small talk outside, she burst out into tears. And Ushijima looked at her, seeing a small figure trembling as big piles of tears formed from her eyes and fell down to her cheek.
"Ushijima, why can't he remember me? Tell me, he's playing a prank on me like always, right?"
"No. He isn't."
Making her fist into a ball, she grips on it enough to feel pain.
"Tendou, came home a few months ago. He told us it took him a month to trace where he once lived. He, had his wife with him. Helping him day by day to find home, to find us—"
"Did you just say, his wife...?"
That stoic face of Ushijima, brings back the days when she told him what to do and kept on disobeying the plan. But Tendou, despite knowing what to do he still bugged her by asking what the infamous tactician has in mind to support Ushijima, and she entertained him.
It didn't take long enough that they would be close, like three beans in a pod they all relate and get each other.
(Why did I just remember that...)
"He called me a year ago, I was actually tired that day. I didn't want to pick up his call because he'll say something again to cheer me up. But that wasn't the case. He called me because he didn't know what to do."
"What do you mean by that...?"
"He woke up from a three month coma and only two numbers were registered on his phone. My number and yours, and he called me."
(What...)
"He told me that he is confused, he didn't know what to do. He wants to be better, he wants to remember. So I helped him. I booked a flight and went to him that very same day and filled those gaps for him and he did, slowly remember them."
"What about me? Did he forget about me?"
A year ago.
"Wakatoshi-kun, this really helped me a lot."
"Hmm, that is what I meant to do."
"Before I forget, I have this other number on my phone it says "Do not Answer"? Why is that, do you know this number, or who it belongs too?"
At an instant, Ushijima already knew whose number it was.
"Yeah, she was your girlfriend back in highschool. You two dated for three whole years."
"Oh, would you mind if you didn't tell her about this? I don't want to be a bother. I actually called her, not knowing it was a bad time. And it seems that I hurt her too much for her to be saying such things."
Back into the present.
"Said such things?"
"Wakatoshi-kun, I think it's best if I take it here now."
(...)
"So, the infamous tactician. Ask away."
"When was that, when you called me?"
"I believe that was the time of my birthday. You said a lot of things, that is why I told Ushijima to keep this between us."
"I was drunk...at that time, and you believed a drunkard that time?!"
"Even if you are drunk, it was you who said it. It might be the truth too."
The call.
"Satori, are you just calling me right now? Are you fucking kidding me? What is wrong with you? After all these years! You call me today where I vow to forget about you?! Are you toying with my feelings?! Am I just a person you dated...?"
"..."
"I hate that I love you. I regret that I loved you. And up until now I hate myself for still loving you...I want to stop loving you, because it hurts me so much...it hurts to love you."
End call.
"The call, made me realize I made people unhappy. Then I met my wife. She was the nurse who helped me get better, she listened to me and understood me. She loves me, and I love her. At the day of our wedding, I asked Ushijima to bring you to be his plus one but he said you rejected the offer?"
"Wedding? Ah...that wedding. He called me out of the blue, even sent a dress. But I was crying over you at that time, he didn't tell me whose wedding it was...if I went would I have stopped it? Would you have come back to me if I did? No, right?"
"(Y/N), I hope that I didn't leave you with more bad memories, we had great ones too right?"
"Satori- Tendou, we had the best ones. Too good to even forget!"
Silence engulfed the both of them until Tendou's wife came to pick him up. She looked at the wife across the field and saw how elegant she is and how she glows underneath the moonlight.
"Please, take care of him."
"You can stop bowing now, the car had left."
"..."
"Do you regret not coming before?"
"No...but even if I did, to see him happy like today...I think if he went back to me I would have never seen him smile and laughed like that...he would be miserable if he came back to me..."
"(Y/N)..."
"The way he is right now, I don't want to rob it of him. He is better off without me. And the sight of that smile puts me at ease. He...looks happy..."
(My love for you bids you farewell, and I'll be letting you go now, goodbye.)