Archive of Our Own

The weather app wasn’t very reliable, Mafuyu had learned.

She diligently remembered to check the forecast before she left. The sun had been shining, and the chance of precipitation had been zero. And yet, here she was, standing under a cafe roof, with the gray clouds pouring rain onto the streets of Shibuya.

Having no umbrella, she was at an impasse. If she continued to walk to school in the pouring rain, she’d worry her classmates. If she didn’t, she’d be late to school and worry her mother. This was why she hated the rain.

Or did she? She had no idea.

As she contemplated, her savior came from… a crash.

Both her and the culprit stumbled, Mafuyu catching herself the wall, and the other not being so lucky, falling on their knees. She didn’t hear a crack, however, just a pained “owwww”, so she assumed they hadn’t been seriously injured.

“Oh my goodness,” Mafuyu put her mask on, her eyebrows furrowing in what conveyed worry. “Are you alright? Here, let me help you up.”

The stranger steadied themselves and took her hand with a lighthearted grimace. It felt soft in hers. “Ahh, thanks! Sorry about that. I was just rushing to get my umbrella out and I didn’t see you. You’re not hurt, right?”

“No, I’m not,” She shook her head. “Thank you for asking. And it’s perfectly alright. It wasn’t on purpose, after all.”

Mafuyu took in the stranger’s appearance. They had long, pink hair, topped by a black cap with a paw print. Their eyes were pink, and a silver earring on their right ear. Their front was covered by a purple tank top, and a long, off-the shoulder pink sweatshirt, with print near where their torso met their stomach, the letters reading “Kitty”. A black lace choker adorned their neck, the appearance being finished by pink acrylic nails. They were the embodiment of everything she’d seen people call cute.

“You also caught in the rain?” They asked, getting out their umbrella.

“Yes,” Mafuyu answered with a sheepish smile. “Since the forecast said there’s zero chance of precipitation, I didn’t take an umbrella today on my way to school. Although that didn’t work out so well…”

The stranger laughed. “Don’t you know you can’t trust the weather app?”

Mafuyu giggled back. “I suppose I do now.”

Silence settled in, until the stranger caught sight of her uniform. “Wait, do you go to Miyamasuzaka?”

“Ah, yes,” She nodded. “I was on my way there until it started raining.”

They seemed to light up at that, giving a big, bright smile. “Really? That’s awesome! That’s actually right on the way to the mall I was going to!”

“Ah, is it?” Mafuyu tilted her head, before smiling, a practiced move. “That’s quite a coincidence. Though I guess it is a small city.”

The stranger laughed, before thinking for a moment. A moment not long enough for Mafuyu to speak any words, but long enough to notice. It ended with a smile. “Hey, how about I walk you there?”

Now that caught Mafuyu off-guard. She had walked home with her classmates a few times, but this was a stranger. A stranger who she did not know the name of, and who did not know her name. And yet, they were offering to walk her to school.

“Are you sure?” She tilted her head. “There’s really no need for that.”

“Really, it’s fine!” They waved a hand with an easygoing smile. “It’s raining, and you might catch a cold without an umbrella. Plus, it’s on the way to where I’m headed, anyway. Just consider it an apology for running into you!”

Mafuyu weighed her options. The rain wouldn’t stop anytime soon, and if she were late for school or showed up soaked in rainwater, she’d certainly get a few stares. So, she nodded.

“Alright,” She smiled. “Thank you for the offer.”

“No problem!” They grinned, holding the umbrella over the two of them. “Nice to meet you, uh…?”

“Asahina Mafuyu.” She replied.

“Akiyama Mizuki,” They beamed. “Nice to meet you, then, Asahina-san!”

“You as well, Akiyama-san.” And with that, they started walking.

Mizuki talked. They talked a lot. About their nails and how their sister used to go to Miyamasuzaka. About their favorite restaurant and hobby of MV making. Mafuyu listened intently, just as she always did when having conversations. Having conversations with lively people was easier, as then, she didn’t have to carry the conversation. It made her heart feel heavier to have to keep up the mask for too long. But she didn’t know why.

They were a first-year at Kamiyama, but when she asked more about it, they deflected. She didn’t push. She understood secrecy better than anyone.

“Ah, we’re here!” Mizuki pointed to the familiar building of Miyamasuzaka, the rain pattering off the roof and onto the ground.

Mafuyu nodded, and spoke up once she was under the safety of the roof. “Thank you so much for walking me here, Akiyama-san.”

“No prob!” They grinned back. “See you around.”

The air felt somewhat colder on her skin after they walked away. She wasn’t sure why.

She saw Mizuki a few times after that.

It was a small world, apparently. Mostly on the street, or at malls or other public places. The conversations were short, however. Just a hi, hello, how are you doing, and they went their separate ways.

And yet it was strange.

Mafuyu didn’t feel most things. The cake at the new bakery everyone said was sweet? It tasted bland to her. That viral song everyone liked that was upbeat and happy? She couldn’t feel anything.

And yet, she felt something in her encounters with Mizuki. She couldn’t quite pinpoint what. Curiosity? A desire for friendship? She wasn’t sure. All she knew was that it wasn’t nothing.

Well, it seemed fate wanted her to chase it. Because she was cursed with another rainy day.

She had been in a rush today. She didn’t have time to pack an umbrella, nor check the forecast. It had looked sunny enough. But the clouds came at the most inconvenient time, when she was about to leave school.

Thankfully, a classmate of hers gave her a spare umbrella, which allowed her to walk… halfway. Until it got blown away by the wind. The grip wasn’t the problem — she was physically strong — but she got distracted by a dog barking. The sudden noise had caused her to loosen her grip.

As she watched it bounce on the streets, she resigned herself to just walk home without an umbrella. Her mother was out today, so she would have time to dry off before anyone saw her. If she was late, she wouldn’t be able to study as much, and if she didn’t, she’d fail the test, and then…

It was better to just get back on time.

The rain pattered at her head and at her skin. Paired with the wind, the temperature was freezing. She’d likely catch a cold. She also had to worry about paying that classmate back for the lost umbrella, and making sure her mother didn’t notice, and that it didn’t affect her studies.

Just as she had resigned to drowning in the rain, the cafe she was next to opened its door. And a familiar person with a clear umbrella met her violet eyes.

“Asahina-san?!”

Mafuyu's eyes widened in genuine surprise. “Akiyama-san?”

Mizuki skipped over and covered her with the umbrella immediately, the onslaught of rain stopping before she got wet enough to catch a cold. “Woah, what are you doing here? Don’t tell me you forgot an umbrella again.”

“I didn’t,” Mafuyu returned their smile with a sheepish chuckle. Technically she did, but there was no need to go on a rant about her day. “I had one, but it got blown away in the wind.”

She gestured to the now-ripped umbrella stuck to a tree a few yards away.

Mizuki laughed. “Ahh, that makes more sense.”

And, just like their first meeting, they extended their umbrella, clear and cloudy from the rain.

“Are you sure?” Mafuyu asked, frowning. “I’d hate to take advantage of your kindness again.”

They waved a hand. “No big deal! I don’t have a lot to do anyway, so it’s not like you’re interrupting anything.”

It must have been an inconvenience even so. But the smile, the compassion, it somehow didn’t seem fake.

“Alright, then.” Mafuyu smiled.

It felt different than the last time. Before, it was just a once-off encounter. Now, they were acquaintances with more familiarity. Although, she wouldn’t go so far as to call them a friend.

Mizuki talked again, just like before. They had a collection of umbrellas back at home, apparently. They showed her a couple pictures on their phone. Speaking of their phone, it was rose gold and decorated with anime stickers. Truly, the only term Mafuyu could think of to describe this person was ‘cute’.

Was it the kind of cute that her classmates talked about when gushing about the boy they saw down the street? The kind of cute that a baby or a kitten was admired for? The kind of cute that an outfit or pink nails were called. Maybe a mix of all three.

“Speaking of which, I never asked about your hobbies, Asahina-san.” Mizuki tilted their head.

Mafuyu smiled, rehearsed. She had heard this question a million times before.

“I’m in the archery club at my school,” She replied. “A classmate recommended it to me.”

“Oh, sounds like fun!”

Was it? She didn’t know.

“It is.” She said instead.

Thankfully, about halfway through their walk, the rain stopped, the sun starting to peek out and dry the soaked streets. People around them put their umbrellas away and continued to walk.

“Oh, it stopped!” Mizuki beamed in relief, umbrella still over their heads for some reason.

“Thank goodness,” She returned their expression with her usual polite smile. “Thank you for walking all this way with me, Akiyama-san.”

“No problem,” Mizuki patted her shoulder, and she wasn’t sure why her skin felt ticklish at the contact. “See you around?”

“See you.”

They both went their separate ways, but the feeling of Mizuki’s hand never left her mind.

The emptiness caught up to her some days, and turned into agony. Today was one of those days.

She didn’t know how she ended up outside. One moment, her tears were dripping onto her homework, mixing salt with lead and wood fiber. The next, she was outside. A considerable way from home, about a ten minute walk. She barely even felt the rainwater soaking into the wool of her cardigan.

It had never bothered her this much before when she answered countless questions about what she wanted to be in the future with ‘doctor’. So why did seeing a post of a woman achieving her dream of becoming a nurse drive her here?

How strange, she thought, as her tears became unrecognizable in the onslaught of rain.

And in the onslaught, she saw a flash of pink.

“Asahina-san?”

Mizuki.

Her first instinct was to quickly wipe away her tears, but she stopped herself. The rain concealed them well enough. Wiping her cheeks would make her look more suspicious.

“Akiyama-san…” Her smile felt more strained. Her cheeks hurt more than usual, and she could clearly feel the cracks of her lips.

“Geez, what is this, the third time this has happened?” Mizuki laughed, swinging their umbrella over her.

Mafuyu forced out a laugh, as well, the movement creating ripples through her stomach that made her feel sick. “Yes… I forgot to check the forecast. I was in a rush.”

“Huh? But it’s evening—” Mizuki tilted their head, before their expression became concerned. “Hey, you okay? You look kinda off today.”

Ah. So they noticed. Mafuyu wasn’t surprised. They seemed like the time to be good at empathy. But it wasn’t as if she could possibly tell them. She was alone in her struggles.

“I’m alright,” She lied. “I just didn’t get enough sleep today.”

They didn’t seem like they believed her, but they didn’t push. They gave an understanding smile. “Alright. Can I walk you home?”

Mafuyu considered. She had stayed in the rain long enough. She’d worry her mother if she caught a cold. And Mizuki was offering so earnestly.

“Sure,” She smiled. “Thank you, Akiyama-san.”

The walk was more silent than usual. But it didn’t feel suffocating. It felt comfortable. Maybe Mizuki knew she didn't have the energy to talk too much. They probably had been through something similar. The secrecy was a clear hint. They both had parts of themselves they couldn’t show.

That made Mafuyu feel strange. Almost like she could connect with Mizuki.

She had never felt like she was able to connect with anyone. No one felt the same as she did — that they didn’t know themselves, that they faked their entire personality. Even if they did, they obviously wouldn’t say. And she never got close enough to anyone to tell.

It wasn’t like she was close with Mizuki, either. She had only met them a handful of times. They probably didn’t feel the same as not knowing themselves. So why, just with the fact that they were slightly similar, did she feel this way?

Why did she feel like they could understand each other?

How strange, she thought, as the tears and rain on her face dried under the protection of Mizuki’s umbrella.

She didn’t have much time to ponder. Her home was only a ten minute walk away. Oddly enough, she found herself wishing it could last longer. She hadn’t felt that in a long time. Possibly not even since she was a child.

“We’re here,” Mafuyu said, squeezing a bit of water out of her hair. “Thank you for walking me all this way.”

“No problem!” Mizuki laughed, and she wasn’t sure why it made her feel a bit lighter. “Rain has kind of become a thing for us, anyways.”

She giggled. “I suppose it has.”

She didn’t question her feelings. She was far too drained to, mentally and physically. She just said her goodbyes and entered her house, watching the pink fade from her retinas.

Mafuyu didn’t go to the mall often. But fall was approaching, and she had outgrown her old sweaters and fleece pants. She intended to get winter clothes as well, just in advance. The mall sold the best clothes around, and today was one of the days that she had time.

It seemed fitting that it would start to rain halfway there.

Luckily, she had started packing umbrellas in her bags now. Checking the forecast had proved useless, so she had decided to just be prepared.

She stopped outside a cafe, under one of the umbrellas in the outdoor seating area to search for it. She found books and school supplies in her bag, along with a snack she packed for herself, but no umbrella.

That was strange. She distinctly remembered putting it in her bag today. Although, she remembered her bag being a tad lighter when she left the house, too.

Could it have fallen out when she left?

How convenient.

She checked her phone. The rain would stop in a couple hours, according to the weather app. By then, however, coupled with the time it took to walk there, most of the stores would already be closed.

It was a shame to have to postpone shopping. Today was an optimal day. But not everything in life was easy. It seemed nothing in hers was.

But when she saw Mizuki, it was easier. And, following along with those strange coincidences fate had thrown at them lately, they came out of the cafe just as Mafuyu planned to cancel her trip to the mall.

“Akiyama-san?”

“Asahina-san?”

They both said each other’s names at the same second. A moment of staring passed before they burst into laughter. Mizuki’s was upbeat and more genuine than she’d ever heard laughter be, and even Mafuyu’s own laugh didn’t feel as fake and forced as it normally did.

“We seriously have to stop meeting up like this.” Mizuki calmed their laughter into giggles, covering her with the umbrella without hesitation.

“We really do.” Mafuyu chuckled back, without protesting.

“Soooo?” They grinned. “What happened this time?”

Were they teasing her? Probably. She just gave a smile in return.

“My umbrella fell out of my bag before I left,” She replied, closing up her bag. “I only just noticed now.”

Mizuki placed a hand on their hip. “Guess I arrived just in time!”

They would help without even asking. Like they were accustomed to this. Like giving her an umbrella in the rain was a ritual for them. That made Mafuyu’s chest tingle, though she wasn’t quite sure what it was. Jealousy at how carefree they were? No, that didn’t seem quite right.

She ignored the feeling for now, and just focused on what was at hand.

“Where are you headed?” They tilted their head in a cat-like manner, a smile on their pink lips.

“To Shibuya mall,” She replied. “I was going to get some clothes for the cold weather.”

Mizuki lit up at that. “No way! That’s where I was going too!”

“Really?” Mafuyu’s expression shifted to surprise, before morphing into a smile. “What a coincidence.”

“For real!” They laughed. It sounded hearty and genuine. Were they happy to see her?

“Hey, wanna go there together?” Mizuki asked, before waving their hands in front of their chest. “I mean— go there together, obviously, since I’ll walk you there! But, shop together too. Like a hangout!”

Hangout.

Mafuyu didn’t get the chance to hang out with people often. She was always busy with school and other activities. Most of her classmates had stopped asking her, automatically assuming she would be too busy. And even during the rare times she did, while her classmates had fun, she felt nothing. She would go home feeling emptier than she did before and never knowing why.

She’d grown to only do them out of obligation. She’d forgotten what ‘having fun’ felt like. And most often, she declined.

And yet, for some reason, with Mizuki…

“Sure,” She smiled. “That sounds lovely.”

And with those four words, Mizuki held the umbrella over both their heads, and they set off to their destination.

The mall was filled to the brim with people.

During Halloween season, everyone flocked to the mall. There was a craze for candy, pumpkins, warmer clothes, and everything related to autumn. It was a favorite season of many, and it only paled to the shopping craze during Christmas, everyone looking for gifts and lights. The pumpkin section near the entrance was almost sold out, and Mafuyu found herself strangely drawn to the last one.

The last time she went shopping for a pumpkin to carve was when she was eleven. Since then, it had been forbidden, being ‘too childish for a mature young lady like Mafuyu’.

Mizuki turned to her, shaking the rainwater off their umbrella and putting it away. “There’s a good store that sells super comfy fall clothes! Want me to show you?”

“That sounds good,” Mafuyu agreed. “Thank you.”

“No problem!” They grabbed her hand. She wasn’t sure why their hand felt warm when it had been so cold outside. She wasn’t sure why the warmth reverberated to her heart, either.

She was led into a cozy-looking shop, with a brown-orange aesthetic that perfectly suited fall. Decorative mini-pumpkins sat on the shelves, and clothes sat in neat arrays on hangers throughout the store. LED tea lights nestled inside the pumpkins and around different areas of the store. She assumed they didn’t want to risk a fire with real candles, considering the amount of faux spiderwebs and other possibly flammable fabric around.

It felt comfortable.

The two of them took a look around the shop, Mizuki adding an incessant amount of cute clothes to the bag they had grabbed. Mafuyu silently wondered if they had the money for all that, but she didn’t say anything. It was not only impolite, but she couldn’t help the thought that all those clothes would look beautiful on them. An interesting thought that she didn’t know why she was thinking, but it was powerful enough to stop her from wondering about any expenses.

She took a look at a white, button-up cardigan. Comfortable and practical, with the wool material to protect from the crisp fall chill. The price seemed reasonable as well. But, it wasn’t the usual style her mother chose for her.

“Ooh, that’d look so cute on you!” Mizuki chimed in, looking over her shoulder. It tingled.

“You think so?” Mafuyu looked to the side, where they were standing with a glittery look in their eyes. “I’m not sure it’s quite my style.”

“I think it totally is!” They stood up straight. “But if you’re not sure, there’s a dressing room right over there. You can try it on and see if you like it.”

It couldn’t hurt.

Mafuyu agreed with an “okay” and stepped inside, taking the cardigan with her. She tugged off her usual dark gray one she wore to school, and replaced it. It was surprising how comfortable the wool felt on her. As she looked at herself in the mirror, she felt strange. She didn’t think it was in a bad way.

She stepped out with a half-smile. “How does it look?”

Mizuki gave a bright grin and a double-thumbs up. “Definitely your style! You look gorgeous!”

She’d been called gorgeous about a thousand times throughout her life. As a toddler when people came up to compliment her mother on her ‘adorable little baby’. As a child when her friends commented on how pretty she looked with her hair up. As a teenager when she got a love confession from a girl in her class, the adjectives being used to describe her always being ‘beautiful and kind’. She’d grown used to it. It didn’t make her feel anything anymore.

Which was why she was confused as to why her stomach felt like it had flipped at Mizuki’s words. It didn’t feel like the bad feeling when she forgot an important item at home or got a slightly lower mark on a test. It felt… good.

Maybe this was just a normal reaction to being complimented. She shrugged it off.

“Thank you,” She replied back, her smile softening a bit as she looked down. “I guess this will be my first purchase.”

The two continued to buy clothes from different various stores, trying on sweaters and coats. Mizuki chose pinker and cuter clothes, while Mafuyu chose plainer and more practical clothes. Her mother would scold her if she came back with anything too brazen. Yet, Mizuki saying how cool some of the leather jackets would look on her almost made her want to buy them.

For today, maybe even just these few hours, she didn’t feel like a student pushing herself to become a doctor. She felt like a teenager.

But that moment couldn’t last forever.

Mizuki was walking through the upper section of the mall, talking about what accessories they wanted to buy next. They had already bought a fair amount of clothes, but according to them, ‘no shopping trip is complete without some cute accessories’. Mafuyu obliged. Her scrunchie had grown old, anyway.

After the accessory shopping, the two had continued walking, deciding on where to go next.

Holding her bags as Mizuki talked about how well the pink bracelet they bought complimented their nails, she couldn’t help but overhear a conversation from the floor below. Two boys were looking at them, she realized as she turned her eyes. From their uniforms, they seemed to be students of Kamiyama.

“Hey, did you see that?”

“Are they on a date or something?”

“Seriously? No way, man. That girl’s way too pretty to be on a date with Akiyama of all people.”

Mafuyu narrowed her eyes. Their tones sounded mocking. Why was that their reaction to seeing Mizuki?

They didn’t seem to notice. They simply continued talking, their bags swinging in their hands.

She chose to ignore it for now. There was a possibility that they were just friends and being playfully insulting. Even if the boys were talking badly about them, there wasn’t much she could do.

“Oh, let’s go to that store!” Mizuki pointed in the direction of a store on the floor below them. “It’s got the prettiest makeup.”

The boys seemed to be gone. Or at least out of sight. Mafuyu nodded. “Alright.”

The two entered the shop. It looked like an average makeup store, with white walls and laminate floors. There were some Halloween sales and decorations, mostly pumpkins and fake spiders. She saw a child scream at one of the spiders, only for her mother to reassure the pouting girl it wasn’t real. Mizuki gave a short laugh at that.

They moved on to check out different makeup and skincare products, seeing which one suited them best. Mizuki wore a lot of makeup, she had observed over the time she’d known them. Mafuyu mainly kept to skincare and light makeup, no more than foundation and lipgloss, along with concealer to cover eye bags. She hadn’t had much interest in makeup since trying on her mothers’ as a child (she was scolded properly). Even if she did, she’d get reprimanded if anyone saw, so she declined.

The moment was alright. She had barely even thought about the boys. Until Mizuki led her to check out some concealer near the entrance.

“Ooh, this is a really good one!” They grinned, touching the black cap of the bottle. “Oh, and it’s on sale! Usually it’s super expensive, but now we can actually get it!”

Mafuyu nodded. “That sounds wonderful. I’ll buy some too. My old concealer is almost out, anyways.”

Just as Mizuki picked up the concealer, she heard a grating voice again. And they did too, this time.

“I mean, seriously?” The boy said mockingly. “My girl goes to Miyajo, and she told me that purple chick’s, like, a doctor-in-training or something. No way would she be on a date with that weirdo.”

He definitely was not a playful friend. She could tell by the tone now that his voice wasn’t drowned out by the sounds of the mall. A bully?

“Ahhh, you’re right, dude,” The boy chortled. “If anything, Akiyama probably forced her to hang out. Can’t imagine such a normal girl hanging out with the freak.”

“Damn, seriously?! We should probably rescue the poor lady!”

The two boys burst into laughter, not seeing them. They were a bit away from the entrance, but if they turned their head to the side, they would see them. Mafuyu chose to turn her attention back to Mizuki. Her eyes widened at what she saw.

They looked petrified.

It wasn’t an expression she’d seen on them before. They were always cheerful. A bit uneasy when her school was asked about, but nothing more than a drop of sweat before a deflecting comment. The most she’d even seen them frown was out of concern for her on the day they found her in the rain during a breakdown.

Now, it looked like they were about to break down.

“Akiyama-san…?” Mafuyu looked at them. The concern in her tone felt genuine.

“H— Huh?” They looked back at her, pink eyes losing their shine.

“Are you alright?”

At those words, Mizuki laughed nervously, visible beads of sweat on their face. They dropped their bag and scratched their cheek, every bit of cheerfulness clearly sounding forced. “Yeah, sorry! Just spaced out! Uhh… I’m gonna use the bathroom real quick! Drank wayyyy too much water. See ya!”

“Ah—“

Mafuyu barely got to utter a single syllable before they ran out of the store, both bags of clothes and accessories dropped on the floor. They looked panicked. She knew they were lying — they hadn’t drank a drop of water since she saw them. But there wasn’t anything she could do. Nothing except drawing conclusions.

The boys seemed to be wearing a Kamiyama uniform. Judging by how Mizuki deflected when she asked about their school, she could assume they got bullied by them. But she still couldn’t understand why they looked so petrified. It seemed more than just being scared of them.

The boys in question seemed surprised when they ran out, before turning their heads to Mafuyu. She gave them a skeptical look, while they stifled laughs.

“Hey, you the girl who was hanging out with Akiyama?” One boy, with glasses, she noticed, said.

“Yes,” She replied, short and curt. She had no interest in speaking to bullies. “Asahina Mafuyu.”

“Damn,” The other boy, one with dark blue hair, snickered. “Did you get threatened into doing it, or something?”

“Me and Akiyama-san were heading to the same place,” She stated. “They offered to hang out with me, and I accepted.

The boy with glasses' eyes widened. “Woah, woah, woah, wait. Don’t tell me you guys are friends?”

Were they friends? Mafuyu wasn’t sure if she could call them that. But, the boys only seemed like they’d mock Mizuki more if she said no. So, she nodded. “Yes. Why?”

Both the boys looked stunned. The one with dark blue hair spoke up. “Wait, so I’m assuming she doesn’t know about that, right?”

“Probably not,” The other guy replied. “Can’t imagine her willingly hanging out with Akiyama if she did!”

Mafuyu had zero idea what they were talking about. But, she felt that whatever they were referring to, it was a personal secret that Mizuki didn’t want anyone to know about.

She picked up Mizuki’s bags that they dropped. “I’m sorry, but I’ll have to cut this conversation short. I have a busy schedule.”

“Suit yourself.” The boy with blue hair shook his head and snickered.

She looked around for Mizuki for a solid half-hour. Even if they didn’t want to talk, she had to at least return the bags to them. She didn’t find them in any of the stores, or in the bathroom when she went to use it. It would have been easier if she had their number, but she never asked for it.

On the thirty-two minute mark, she finally saw them. Outside the window of the mall.

She moved out the entrance. The rain had stopped. The sunset painted the sky in a beautiful array of purples, pinks, and orange. If what happened with the two boys hadn’t occurred, Mizuki probably would have marveled over it.

She couldn’t read them, she realized as she looked at them. They had a wistful, empty smile on their face. Their eyes looked beautiful, tinted by the colors of the sky, but they didn’t have the glint they normally did.

“Akiyama-san.” Mafuyu greeted, holding the bags. She morphed her eyes into what she hoped was a non-threatening gaze.

Mizuki looked back at her with a resigned look. “Hey. Sorry for running out like that, haha… realized I needed to get home.”

“I understand,” She replied. “I just wanted to return the bags of clothes you bought.”

She held them out to Mizuki. They took them, her hands feeling warm when they brushed.

The feeling of compassion was a strange one. With her parents, it was a need to help rather than a desire. Occasionally, she felt it towards closer peers. But, usually, she helped people out of a sense of obligation rather than genuine feeling. But, for Mizuki, she felt as though she genuinely wanted to help. The only thing stopping her was that she felt there was no way to.

“Thanks,” Mizuki smiled. “And, thanks for coming out with me today. I had fun. Sorry it has to end so abruptly.”

“It’s alright,” She shook her head. Out of an unknown stirring in her chest, she added, “If you need anything, please ask.”

Polite as always, but the words held more weight this time. Was she worried? Most likely.

They nodded back. “Yeah! Thanks, Asahina-san.”

An awkward silence set in, before they waved with a lopsided smile. “See you around.”

“See you...” Mafuyu returned.

Mizuki walked away. The sunset didn’t look as beautiful.

This time, she didn’t forget an umbrella.

It was the middle of October, and the last weeks before the rain turned to snow. She was glad she had gone to the mall with Mizuki when she did. Fall and winter clothes had all but sold out.

It was just a short walk to the pharmacy. Her mother had asked for some cough drops to help with the cold she had contracted, and Mafuyu diligently agreed. Oddly enough, when it started raining, she wished she had forgotten the umbrella so that Mizuki could cover her with theirs. It was a strange and impractical thought, possibly caused by the abrupt and concerning end to their shopping trip a couple weeks prior.

She looked around in the sea of rain. A mother covered her child with an umbrella, who protested, saying that the rain was fun. Two cats found shelter under an empty space in a brick wall, cuddling up to each other.

And, when she turned to the other side of the crosswalk, Mizuki was there, standing one road away on the sidewalk.

The two stared at each other for a moment, before Mizuki gave a short wave. “Asahina-san!”

On the next red light, they jumped across the street onto Mafuyu’s sidewalk. Puddles splashed beneath their feet, making ripples once they settled before turning still. The two umbrellas, one clear and one magenta bumped, their worlds connecting.

“It’s good to see you again,” Mafuyu said with genuine relief. “It’s been a while.”

It hadn’t, not at all. But to her, it felt like an eternity.

“Yeah!” They chuckled. “The necklace you bought looks great on you, by the way.”

“Thank you.” She smiled.

Mizuki was smiling, just as always. But she could tell that it wasn’t like before. It didn’t reach their eyes, and their grip on the umbrella was weaker. There was no teasing comment about how she finally brought her umbrella, or a comment about their day, or anything like the Mizuki she had known. She also could see a bit more makeup on their face.

She thought of asking if they were alright. But she felt that she wouldn’t get an honest reply. She had been on the reversed side of that question before, plenty of times.

“How have you been?” She settled on instead. A polite ask, but an invitation to talk.

“I’ve been good,” Mizuki said with a lopsided grin. “Exam season is coming up, so I’ve been studying harder.”

Likely not the truth, but Mafuyu wasn’t one to push. “It’s been very busy for me as well. Especially considering cram school.”

“Ah, yeah,” They chuckled, rubbing their nape. “Guess we’re both pretty busy.”

The conversations weren’t this awkward before. Mizuki was a chatterbox, and any silence was filled by them. Even the time they found her during a breakdown and stayed silent, it hadn’t been awkward. It had been comfortable. She didn’t know why that made her feel uneasy. Was it concern? Attachment? Compassion? She couldn’t quite tell.

“Sorry again for running so quickly last time.” Mizuki finally broke the silence.

Why were they apologizing again? She already said she understood.

“No, not at all,” She replied. She didn’t bring up the boys, because Mizuki’s face told her they’d close up like a flower in reverse if she did. “The sun was setting anyway.”

“Still, I feel guilty.” They chuckled, and silence set in again.

Both of them had umbrellas, and yet the rain felt heavier than ever. It wasn’t windy. And she knew it wasn’t the darkness of the clouds.

It was strange. This person she’d only met a handful of times made her feel things she’d never felt before. She couldn’t place these feelings, yet they still enveloped her like a ribbon. Whether it was a good or bad thing, she couldn’t tell.

But, above all, it was a feeling.

“Would you like me to walk you home?”

The sentence was blurted out before she could think of it, far too impulsive for what little she knew of herself. She felt an unknown sense of desperation that she couldn’t understand, something she’d never felt before. When she saw the surprised look on Mizuki’s face, she opened her mouth to elaborate.

“Ah, I just thought of it, since you’ve walked me to my destinations so many times,” She said, her heart twisting inside her chest, seeing them bite their lip nervously. “It would only be fair.”

Mizuki gave a kind smile, before shaking their head. “Nah, that’s okay. But… thanks for offering. You’re really kind, Asahina-san.”

No, she wasn’t. Not in any way. That statement was likely just for her own sake, to try and better understand these feelings. Born out of pure selfishness, just as everything she did was.

“Hey,” They started, before closing up their umbrella and walking closer. “I wanted to give something to you.”

Mafuyu’s eyes widened as the rain began to soak into Mizuki’s hair. “What are you—?”

She didn’t have time to respond before the umbrella was shoved into her hands, the clear plastic glistening with rain.

She looked up to them, instinctively covering them with her umbrella. “What…? But, without your umbrella, you’ll…”

Her words died on her tongue.

They shook their head, waving a hand. “Nah, it’s alright! I’m gonna head to the store across the street, so it’s barely a minute out in the rain. I’ll buy a new one there. Just keep it, okay? I won’t take it back now!”

Something felt wrong about this. But, against her better judgment, Mafuyu nodded and gave a forced smile. “Alright. Thank you, Akiyama-san.”

“No problem,” They adjusted their cap. “I’ll head off now. Nice seeing you again!”

“You as well,” She returned. “See you around.”

Mizuki smiled, stepped out of her umbrella’s shelter, and gave a wave. “Bye, Mafuyu.”

Her breath hitched as they walked away, and she nearly dropped the umbrella. They had never called her by her first name before.

They had been off since the encounter with those two boys. Maybe they had more trouble at school from them. That was most likely the reason. They had the same look in their eyes that she did when she saw herself in the mirror.

But there wasn’t anything she could do. So, closing up her own umbrella, she opened up Mizuki’s and continued to walk to the pharmacy.

It was raining again.

The forecast had said there was no chance of precipitation. The clouds were light gray. She was on her way to school. Everything was the same as the first day she met Mizuki. Except for two things.

This time, she brought an umbrella. Mizuki’s umbrella, specifically — the one they gave her before they parted for the last time.

And, this time, Mizuki wasn’t here to hold it for her.

The last time they parted had truly been the last time. They were no longer there. No longer there to hold out their umbrella and give a welcoming smile. No longer there to chat about their day and light up the dark skies with their laugh. No longer there to pat her shoulder goodbye when the rain stopped and she no longer needed an umbrella. No longer there to give an understanding smile and offer a hand when she lied that she was fine. No longer there to ever have a chance of another hangout, with no interruptions this time. No longer there to ever see again.

Mafuyu looked down as she walked. An umbrella had never felt so heavy in her hands.

Children danced and laughed, adults groaned and sighed, cats ran and hid, and cars honked and beeped. It was noisy, and yet, none of it reached her. Every wave of sound was drowned out by the pattering of rain against her umbrella, and every feeling was muffled by the emptiness in her chest.

She knew the feeling of emptiness better than anyone. It was the feeling she was accustomed to, one that she almost never went without. If it wasn’t emptiness, it was pain. But Mizuki had made her feel something other than that.

The flips in her stomach when they gave her a compliment, the ticklish feeling when they touched her, the feeling of comfort when they offered their umbrella, the laughter at the irony of always finding her without an umbrella that didn’t feel quite as forced as it always did.

It didn’t feel like being strangers. It didn’t feel like being acquaintances. It didn’t even feel like being friends. It felt—

She suddenly looked up, nearly dropping her umbrella in shock.

Oh.

Had she been in love with them?

She looked down, her eyes stinging. It was ironic, really. Her, who barely felt any emotions other than despair, had fallen in love in such a short time. And as soon as it came, it was lost.

The emptiness in her chest was worse than any pain she’d ever felt. Before, she couldn’t quite understand what was missing, what feeling was there to uncover. But, now, she knew exactly what it was. She knew exactly who it was.

She never got to chase her feelings. She never got to find herself with them. She never got to form a true connection.

And soon, the rain would turn to snow, and when it came back, they wouldn’t be there to offer her an umbrella. She’d never feel that warmth again.

“Mizuki…” Their first name slipped past her lips for the first time, and she let the clouds in her eyes give way to rain.