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When the words first appeared on Kenzaki’s wrist in high school, he already feared the worst. What kind of breakup is that gonna be like? he wondered. What kind of person will I be when I’m older if I don’t want to fight for that relationship? When he voiced his concerns to some of his close friends, they all laughed and teased him. The new nickname spread throughout the entire third-year floor by the end of the day: Heartbreaker Kenzaki.
No one really approached him romantically after the moniker circulated—they were all afraid to be the soulmate that would be left behind. Kenzaki didn’t mind it as much as he probably should have. It just meant that he had more time to focus on protecting people, in whatever way possible. He could spare another potential soulmate from whatever tragic fate their relationship would end in.
When he was recruited into B.O.A.R.D. after graduation, he didn’t think about it anymore. He didn’t have time to think about it with his induction, his tests for the Rider System, his training. Kenzaki usually wore a wristband to cover the imprint. He couldn’t afford to get distracted. In fact, he almost forgot that there were words imprinted onto his skin until he happened to catch a glimpse of Tachibana’s back: lines—thin and wispy, like they could disappear into the air at any moment—that spelled out “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t you worry about it sometimes?” Kenzaki asked as they changed out of their training clothes.
Tachibana took a moment to ponder on the question. Kenzaki liked that about him—it made Tachibana seem more reliable, like a senpai should.
“For me,” Tachibana finally said, “there’s no use in worrying about it. Everyone has their soulmate’s words imprinted on them. That doesn’t mean the relationship necessarily ended badly. So I would strive to make the best out of our time together and hopefully lose them after we’ve grown old together.”
“What a mature answer. Just what I’d expect from you.”
Tachibana grabbed his helmet and motorcycle keys from the locker. He walked towards the exit and stopped by the doorway. “Well, I guess it also helps that my imprint is in a place where I can’t easily see it.”
Kenzaki looked down at his wrist and clicked his tongue. He wished he could forget about it as easily as Tachibana.
For a time, thanks to the wristband, he actually did: the destruction of B.O.A.R.D., the possibility of Tachibana’s betrayal, the arrival of Aikawa Hajime and the revelation of him being an Undead… The maelstrom of fighting and sealing and trying to figure out the bigger picture overshadowed his petty soulmate problems. He hadn’t expected to be reminded of it when he found Hajime passed out at the bottom of a ravine.
He was lucky that he found an abandoned house by the river. Kenzaki couldn’t exactly lug around Hajime’s body with green blood dripping down his hand. So he dropped him off at the house, hoping he won’t just wake up and leave, and drove twenty kilometers just to get to the nearest pharmacy. Kenzaki didn’t even stop to consider why he shouldn’t be helping this guy—an Undead, a suspicious Rider, an enemy. Hell, he didn’t even think a bitter He owes me for this.
The only thing piercing through the muddled sea of thoughts in his mind—the only words resonating with his heart—were: Help him.
Kenzaki ended up buying medicine, bandages, a towel, a plastic bucket, and a quick packet of instant porridge. He then went back to the river first in order to fetch some water. In hindsight, he thought as he hauled the bucket back to the house, maybe I should’ve wrapped his arm with something. He didn’t think Undead could bleed out as easily as humans and it had only been a small trickle of green ooze anyway. He’s probably fine.
“Oh, thank god,” Kenzaki breathed out in relief, seeing Hajime’s unconscious body right where he had left him. He was quick to reach his side and set the bucket down next to him. He dipped the towel into the water before rolling up Hajime’s sleeve and gently running the damp cloth up his hand and wrist.
The green blood soaked into the cloth, revealing words on the surface of Hajime’s wrist. The lines were thick, unlike the ones on Tachibana’s back, with some fuzzy edges like television static. They looked strong and full of conviction, yet slightly wavering: “That should be good enough.”
Kenzaki unrolled the bandages and gingerly wrapped Hajime’s wrist after applying the ointment to help clot the wound. So even an Undead can have a soulmate, huh… Was their soulmate another Undead? Could they be human? After he clipped the bandages together, Kenzaki looked down at his own wrist. Against his better judgment, he pulled off the wristband that concealed his imprint for who-knows-how-long and studied the lines closely for the first time. It was a strange mix of curving and jagged lines—like an alien language, full of elegance and power and confusion—that spelled out “Where are you going?”
Whoever Hajime’s soulmate is, Kenzaki thought to himself as he made the instant porridge, things aren’t going to go well.
Hajime woke up shortly after. His tense shoulders and flighty eyes told Kenzaki enough. Kenzaki held back in asking him every question that milled around in his head and, instead, gave a reassuring smile. When Hajime strains himself trying to get up, Kenzaki spared no second rushing to his side. I want to help you, he thinks, hoping that Hajime could somehow understand his intentions. Something swelled up inside him when he saw Hajime grab the bowl of porridge he offered him—he couldn’t help but smile wider.
Hajime forced himself to relax and lied back down quietly, letting Kenzaki take back the bowl of porridge.
“You saw the words on my skin when you tended to my wound, did you not?” Hajime asked. Kenzaki hummed an affirmative. “What is it? What do the words mean?”
“You don’t know? I would’ve thought Amane told you by now.”
“She didn’t,” Hajime said, staring up at the ceiling. “She got upset when she saw it and refused to talk about it any further.”
Kenzaki laughed, “Looks like she got jealous.”
“Explain.”
“Those words are supposed to be your soulmate’s last words to you.” Kenzaki heard that a pair’s imprints appear at the same time, so he assumed Amane’s hadn’t appeared yet when Hajime went to ask her. Poor kid and her schoolgirl crush on an Undead, he thought.
“That’s impossible,” Hajime said. “You know what I am.”
“Well, you never know. I mean, you’re a pretty weird Undead. Maybe you’ll find another weird guy to be your soulmate.”
“That’s highly unlikely.”
“I’m sure we’ll find out what happens in time.” Kenzaki pushed himself off the ground and grabbed the bucket. “I’m gonna get some more water, so rest up. No moving, okay? Doctor’s orders.”
He heard Hajime scoff. “Doctor, he says…”
Kenzaki shut the door behind him quickly. He didn’t want Hajime to see him grinning—because he knew that those words were Hajime’s own attempts at humor. For some reason, it made Kenzaki insanely happy to catch a glimpse of it. Hajime was serious and mysterious, but he couldn’t be that bad. He’s helped him out plenty of times, even though Hajime never admitted it, and saved the Kuriharas several times. Maybe Hajime wasn’t really their enemy.
Those were the words he tried to convey to Kotaro and Shiori when they came to the forest—when they invaded the strange sanctity of the abandoned house where he and Hajime made their first connection outside of fighting one another. There was something instinctive about his need to defend Hajime—and the voice that drummed Help him, help him, help him in his head only drove him further in trying to convince Kotaro that saving Hajime had been the right choice.
The alarm of the Undead tracker abruptly ended the conversation. Things went back to the way it had been instantly: Kenzaki sped off to seal the Undead with Kotaro and Shiori backing him up from a distance. He didn’t know what Hajime did after he left. Then again, he never really knows what Hajime is up to. But Kenzaki can trust him enough now to leave him to his own devices. He can forget about the unnecessary soulmate dilemma again. He had to, as he dove deeper into the business with the Undead and Battle Fight and whatever other terminology gets bandied around.
Kenzaki was relieved when Noboru Shima revealed himself to be an Undead on their side. The voice in his mind that yearned to protect Hajime only grew stronger since that moment in the ravine. Shima seemed like the only logical person to turn to—but with Mutsuki’s possession by the Spider Undead, the timing always seemed off.
The chance finally arrived after he came home from a fruitless search for Mutsuki. He had gone upstairs to give Shima some food, at Kotaro’s request. Kenzaki hadn’t meant to blurt out the question, but it left his lips without him knowing anyway.
“Can Undead have soulmates?”
“You would think not, right? Since Undead only live for battle, it’s only natural to think that superfluous concepts like soulmates wouldn’t matter to them. But, as you can see right in front of you, there are always exceptions. You have me—an Undead with no thirst for battle.” Shima smiled knowingly before adding, “And you have Aikawa Hajime, an Undead with a destined other.”
Kenzaki’s eyes widened a little. “How’d you know it was Hajime I was talking about?”
Shima laughed softly. Natural fluttered around in her cage, tweeting out a laugh of her own. “I happened to see his imprint when we shook hands. Color me surprised when I saw it was on his wrist, like yours.”
He supposed it was kind of a nice coincidence, but Kenzaki hadn’t thought of it as anything more than that. “Is that supposed to mean anything?”
“You don’t know?” Shima asked, genuinely curious. Kenzaki shook his head. “Ah, well. I’ve heard from other humans that soulmates have their imprints in the same location.”
He remembered the desire to help Hajime as he lay at the bottom of the ravine. He remembered the happiness he felt when he heard Hajime make his own version of a joke. He remembered how desperately he wanted to make Kotaro understand that Hajime wasn’t a bad person. He remembered the voice that constantly told him to protect Hajime.
Kenzaki’s heart clenched tightly, as if it wanted to search Hajime out. The feeling was so intense that he could only let out a soft, “Oh.”
Shima reached over the small table that sat between them and patted Kenzaki’s hand. “You and he will walk an arduous path. But remember: you must be strong. You must not falter. After despair, surely hope will come. You mustn’t let the words on your skin scare you.”
He closed his eyes and let his mind conjure Hajime’s image. He could feel in his heart that Hajime had the desire to live amongst humans, even if it was buried deep within his own soul. Kenzaki knew that he wasn’t a bad person. Hajime would be acting like the other Undead if he was—and while he may be cold, he’s not entirely ruthless.
He opened his eyes. “I understand. Thank you.”
Shima nodded his head. “You’re welcome. You should get some rest. You’ve had a long day, looking for that boy. Come to me anytime you want, even just for a small chat.”
Their next chat never came: Shima was sealed by Leangle soon after. Kenzaki wished he was still around. Trying to figure all this out by himself was tough. Things only got harder when Hajime’s identity as the Joker came to light.
“Kenzaki, I’ll find more details on the Joker,” Tachibana told him sternly. He rose from his seat, never once breaking eye contact from Kenzaki. “Until then, do nothing.”
You can’t possibly expect me to do that, his mind screamed. You don’t understand. Hajime’s a good person—and right now he needs my help. You can’t tell me to leave him behind.
“Don’t even think about saving him.”
As Tachibana left, Kenzaki clicked his tongue and got up from his seat to go to his room. His heart forced the words, quiet and bitter, out of his mouth. “Why can’t any of you see what I see?”
The entire night, all sorts of voices competed for dominance. The voices of Tachibana, King, Mutsuki, Kotaro, and Shiori overtook the voice that chanted for Hajime’s protection. They all said the same thing: Joker is a cold-blooded killer. Joker fights not for the innate survival of his species, but for the sake of attaining victory. The facts where there, but Kenzaki wanted to believe that what his heart has been telling him this entire time was the truth.
“Shima-san,” Kenzaki said to what felt like a distant memory, “would you say the same thing, too? Would you give up on Hajime?”
Kenzaki received no reply. He fell asleep, not knowing what else he would’ve expected in asking a question to someone who was no longer with them. The answer surprisingly came the next morning from Kotaro, who told him, “What’s clear right now is that Aikawa Hajime is captured by the enemy. Shouldn’t that be enough?”
What kind of person will I be when I’m older if I don’t want to fight for that relationship?
He sat up and grabbed some of the food Kotaro made for him before heading off. He found Hajime being attacked by Leangle; and the voice once again called out, his mind and heart both saying the same thing: Help him. He whisked Hajime away on his motorcycle without a second thought. Kenzaki didn’t care anymore. Even if no one else believed that Hajime could be spared without the destruction of the world following afterward—even if Hajime himself didn’t believe it—Kenzaki will fight for him.
“I don’t care about your true form,” Kenzaki told him at the pier. “To me, you’re Aikawa Hajime.”
He saw Hajime’s face tense up before saying, “That can’t be wholly true.”
“But it is!” Kenzaki insisted, grabbing him by the arms. “It’s true and you know that it’s true. Because I’m sure that you’ve realized by now that we have something special between us.”
Kenzaki willingly took off the wristband for the first time in years. Hajime’s eyes immediately latched onto the words on his skin and looks down at his own wrist, letting the implications sink in. Kenzaki loosened his hold but stepped closer, almost bumping their foreheads together but not quite. He had to fight the urge to just take Hajime in his arms and hold him tight—had to fight the urge to run his fingers through his hair and tell him that they’ll figure something out together.
“I want to help you,” he said instead. “I believe in you.”
“You…” Hajime slowly turned towards the water and sighed. “It’s just as the voice says…”
“The voice?”
“There are two voices I hear, from time to time. There is that of the Joker, the one who drives the instinct for constant battle. Then, there is another—one that calls out to me every time you appear. It tells me to trust you.” Hajime took out his Two of Hearts and gave it a thoughtful stare. “Perhaps it’s him telling me that.”
“The one sealed in that card… Can you tell me more about it?”
What Hajime told him afterwards about the Human Undead only confirmed Kenzaki’s suspicions: Hajime loathed his Joker identity. Hajime wanted the strengths that came with emotions. Hajime wanted to be human.
But the Joker identity didn’t let itself get discarded so easily. The threat of its appearance and destruction always loomed over them, even after Hajime retrieved Chalice’s cards. When Garren was taken out of the Battle Fight, the Joker pushed through and took over, bringing an endless army of Dark Roaches with him to fulfill its duty in eliminating humanity. Kenzaki knew that Hajime wouldn’t do this out of his own free will, but Hajime couldn’t control the Joker enough to stop this apocalypse either.
“Kenzaki-san, we’re both running ourselves dry,” Mutsuki told him as they fought off a horde of Roaches at the field where they found the Joker. Kenzaki almost couldn’t believe it, but he knew that Hajime wanted to shed that form more than anything. Even now, he trusted Hajime. Even now, he wanted to go after him—but the Roaches were in the way. “We can’t keep this up for much longer.”
“We have to try,” Kenzaki answered, slicing one in half. He sloppily dodged a pincer attack from two more that suddenly appeared at his sides. Mutsuki caught him as he staggered back, tripping over his own feet from the exhaustion that came with endless fighting.
“I know Aikawa-san is your soulmate,” Mutsuki said. Kenzaki jerked his head up. He had never told anyone aside from Shima and Hajime himself about who his soulmate was. How did Mutsuki know? “I never got why you tried so hard for him, but then I remembered how Nozomi fought for me. Even when she didn’t know what was going on, when she didn’t have the power to stop me, she kept trying to do what she could because she could tell I was in trouble.”
Mutsuki helped Kenzaki to his feet, alert to the Dark Roaches slowly closing in. “I understand why you’re hesitating so much now—but are you really willing to give up on the world just so you could spare him?!”
“I want to save both!” Kenzaki ran his cards through his sword and attacked the horde with a Lightning Slash. They both untransformed as the Roaches disintegrated and Kenzaki immediately fell to one knee. His breathing was slow and haggard and he looked up at Mutsuki almost pleadingly—because Mutsuki should be able to understand, shouldn’t he?—when he said, “Hajime never wanted any of this. He just wants to be normal. I want to give him that normal life with all the people he cares about. I want him to be happy! I need to help him!”
“Can’t you see how selfish you’re being?!” Mutsuki yelled, pulling Kenzaki up to his feet and grabbing him by the shoulders. “He’s not Aikawa Hajime anymore! Even he knows that! Didn’t you see how he was when we got here?!”
On his knees. Bitter laughter. As if an Undead could die…
“He knows he’s hurting people, whether they’re good or not,” Mutsuki continued. “He knows he’s going to hurt someone close to him if he keeps it up. You said it yourself, Kenzaki-san—he doesn’t want any of this. Just spare him the heartbreak and put him out of his misery already!”
Kenzaki wiped at the cut on his cheek and stained the side of his hand and wrist, no longer hidden by a band. He stared at the imprint he fought so desperately forget. The spindly and jagged words alongside the red blood smeared by it made him think.
“If you won’t do it, Kenzaki-san,” Mutsuki said, running back to mount his motorcycle, “then I’ll be the one to seal him!”
As Mutsuki rode away, Kenzaki echoed the words on his skin quietly: Where are you going? He straightened up and clenched his fist. He knows what he’s doing is selfish. But the voice kept chanting the same thing: Help him, help him. Kenzaki already resolved to fight for his soulmate, to stay strong, to never falter. Now that he had an idea, he needed to take the chance. He’ll keep fighting for Hajime, until the very end. He knows what to do. He knows where to go.
If they couldn’t unseal the Undead, then Kenzaki just had to make one.
After all that’s happened—Mutsuki winding up at the hospital, Tachibana and Chief Karasuma returning to them, wearing his body out to its limits—he wound up going to the abandoned house at the ravine. Hajime was there, sitting by a fire he had made. If Kenzaki didn’t know better, it almost seemed like the world outside this place wasn’t falling apart. His empty eyes, cold voice and impassive face only changed when he inadvertently transformed into the Joker, tearing apart the house and the last of their sanctuary.
The forest within that ravine was always a place for the two of them. Without the house to bind them together cordially, all that was left was to fight. However—
“Why didn’t you use your Wild Card?!” Kenzaki asked, staggering to his feet after Hajime deflected his Lightning Sonic attack. Hajime used his Two of Hearts to change back to his human form.
“…You noticed?”
“I did. You’re purposely trying to make me seal you!”
“Is there any other way? I can no longer control my body at will… When attacked, I just return to being another animal with the hunger for battle.”
That’s not true, Kenzaki thought. There’s another way. His heart called out to Hajime’s: I’ll help you. Please don’t give up! We’re almost there!
“The only one who can defeat me is you and you alone.”
Kenzaki pressed his lips together tightly. Hajime trusted him with his fate and the fate of the world. He already gave up on his own happiness. Like Mutsuki said before, he’s just waiting to be sealed away—to be put out of his misery.
“You and I can only understand each other through battle,” Hajime said, taking up his stance. Kenzaki transformed into King Form. “Show me your soul through your blade, Kenzaki!”
They exchanged blow after blow throughout the forest. Even a direct hit from a Royal Straight Flush wasn’t enough to completely overwhelm the Joker. In the end, they resorted to using their fists. Kenzaki put all his feelings into every punch, wanting to impart small pieces of hope with every bit of contact he could muster. I’m close, Kenzaki thought. Just a little longer!
A vile sensation coursed throughout Kenzaki’s body when they landed simultaneous hits at each other’s chests. His fist left the spot where Hajime’s heart should have been and reeled back as his limbs pulsed abnormally. His breathing slowed and he could feel his body changing inside of him..
“I…”
I did it.
“Do it now,” Hajime told him. “Hurry and seal me.”
I don’t have to anymore, he thought, reaching at his belt to get out of his transformation. He was bloody and bruised, but the result of all his tireless work was dripping down his wrist, covering his imprint: green blood.
“Kenzaki…” Hajime changed back to his human form, almost unbelieving. “From the beginning… this was what you intended…”
The Master’s arrival only confirmed it: the Battle Fight resumed. I don’t want that anymore, Kenzaki thought, punching the Master to shards. It rebuilt itself further away from them. He glared at the spiraling slab and yelled, “I won’t fight!”
With those few words, the Master rose up into the sky and disappeared.
“Kenzaki—”
“Stay away!”
Hearing Hajime say his name hurt. So this is how it’s gonna end, huh? Didn’t even get a chance to go out and we’re already breaking up. Even though he wanted to stay behind, hold Hajime in his arms, spend the rest of their eternity together, Kenzaki knew that he couldn’t be near him. But if it meant Hajime was able to live with the people he loved, then he didn’t care. He was able to spare Hajime and the world. He didn’t regret a thing.
“No matter how far apart, the Master will call for us to fight,” Hajime said. His eyes were pleading and Kenzaki could, for the first time, hear Hajime’s heart clearly: Don’t leave. “To comply with our instincts and fight is the fate of the Undead.”
“Then I will fight fate,” Kenzaki replied, “and win.”
“…Is that your answer?”
Kenzaki didn’t want it to be his answer, but it had to be. “You should continue living among the humans.”
“Where are you going?”
He started stepping back. If he was around Hajime any longer, he would want to stay behind. Or maybe worse, want to fight. “Where we cannot meet. Where we cannot contact each other. That should be good enough.”
He smiled reassuringly despite the pain his face felt. He tried to smile the same way when they first talked in this forest, in that house, in their special place. He tried to convey all his feelings with that smile and when he turned around and heard Hajime say his name once more—like a wish, a prayer, a plea—Kenzaki knew that Hajime heard his heart’s message: I love you. Kenzaki didn’t look back.
So that’s that, he thought, making sure to duck under the foliage and take a hidden route down the side of the cliff. He looked down at his wrist and wiped away the green blood. The imprint was fading.
“From one burden to another,” he muttered to himself. He knew Hajime would be okay. He has others who love him. If he had a broken heart, it would heal in time. Kenzaki’s heart will do the same. “I’d make a shitty boyfriend anyway.”
Kenzaki found his motorcycle and rode off towards the horizon, the voice in his mind finally silenced.