Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Rowena’s visits to the bunker had become more frequent in the last couple of months and she often found herself enjoying the quiet of the library, broken only by the brothers’ bickering in the background. It was a nice change from the solitude of her own home - though if anyone was to ask she would tell them she came here solely for the easily accessible resources.

The spell she was working on had taken her just about all morning, tweaking the components and wording, and although this kind of work often tested her patience it was always satisfying when she figured out how to get it just right. The words flowed naturally from her tongue now, having worked out the kinks of the spell.

She was so absorbed in her work that she almost missed it. Almost.

Something out of the corner of her eye lit up faintly. A pale blue colour that was almost imperceptible in the already lit bunker. She let the words she had been muttering for the last hour trail off and moved to the tucked away corner behind the bookcase where a half opened box lay discarded on one of the shelves.

The dagger was not eye-catching by any means; maybe at some point in time, when it was first made, but certainly not now. Though the ivory blade had aged gracefully, the hilt of the dagger had seen better days. What had once been bronze vines, snaked their way around the handle in intricate designs, discoloured with time and chipped in places. She let her fingers graze along the edge carefully, lifting it up to inspect it.

The blade itself was engraved with runes that Rowena did not recognize, and they were glowing with a muted blue colour.

Sam was passing the library when he spotted Rowena with the dagger in hand. He felt unease coil in his stomach - he and Dean had picked up the artifact just a few days ago, no idea what it was or what it did, and they had pushed it to the bottom of their priority list, having much more urgent matters to deal with. He discarded his mug on the table and walked up to her.

“Curiosity killed the cat, you know,” he said, peering over her shoulder. 

She didn’t turn. “Indeed, but satisfaction brought it back,” she answered, and he could practically hear the smirk.

Sam raised his eyebrows, reaching over to turn the dagger in her grip to get a better look.

The air around them crackled to life. The pale blue glow coming from the engraved runes surged to life with an almost blinding light. It shimmered with an otherworldly energy, growing in the space between them, spiraling outward in luminous tendrils that snaked around them in intricate patterns only to intertwine with each other.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything,” Rowena answered as she watched, transfixed by the light now shifting between shades of rich blue to radiant violet, finally settling on a golden hue.

The warm feeling spreading in his chest caused Sam to look down. A thin tether emerged from each of their chests, twining itself together from the energy still crackling around them. His eyes widened as it grew longer and longer, seemingly drawn to Rowena’s tether.

His eyes flickered down to meet Rowena’s. There was barely any space left between the two ends of their threads.

The air stilled around them. They held their breath, waiting.

And then the two ends connected.

The light was blinding, and this time they had to cover their eyes. The energy thrummed so loudly they could feel it deep in their bones, dancing around them in a nonsensical pattern.

“We-”

Whatever Sam was about to say was drowned out by the sudden shockwave sent out from between them. The air rippled like disturbed water, bending and warping as it swept across the space, the impact reverberating through their entire beings.

Books hit the floor in heaps, the mug Sam had placed on the table crashing into the wall. The dagger all but dissolved in Rowena’s grasp, leaving behind it only a shimmering dust cloud. The air was left humming with residual power, vibrating with the aftershock of the immense energy that had just been unleashed.

They stared at each other, almost too scared to move.

The silence was broken by Dean rushing into the room. “What’s going on?”

Sam waved his hand in a placating manner but his brows remained furrowed and his eyes lingered at the empty space where the dagger had been in Rowena’s hands. “We’re fine. I think,” he added, his eyes flicking down to the tether. “Funny thing, you remember that dagger we found a couple days ago?”

Dean’s face fell slack in as he caught onto what Sam was saying.

“You did not.” He said incredulously. “That is probably an ancient - not old, ancient dagger - and you two are playing around with it? What the hell were you thinking?”

Sam sighed. “We weren’t ‘playing around with it’,” he mimicked Dean’s voice, moving to pick up the shattered mug; damn it, that was his favorite one. “We were just talking and it-” He was suddenly yanked backwards, stopping any sort of movement as he struggled to find his footing again. The tether surged with energy and burned brighter.

All three of them exchange a look, dread quickly replacing any other feeling.

Sam took a step back, watching the tether hum to life. The farther he moved, the brighter it glowed. They both froze when it grew taut, the glow almost blinding for a moment before Rowena, with a resigned sigh, stepped closer again. The closer they got, the softer the light became, fading to a near-invisible shimmer when they stood side by side again.

They tested it a few more times, each stepping back and forth, gauging the limit of their strange confines. Six feet. No more.

“Brilliant,” Rowena huffed, crossing her arms. 

“Could be worse,” Sam said with a pained smile.

“How exactly could this be worse?”

“Well, we could be six feet under instead of six feet apart.” He chuckled a little at his own joke before growing serious again. “What now?”

Dean made his way back to the bunker, the Impala's engine growling as it tore through the darkening streets making his way back from the old estate for the second time in a week.

When he finally arrived he found Sam and Rowena hunched over the desk, surrounded by a sea of papers, notes, and old tomes they'd dug up from the bunker’s archives. Rowena was motioning impatiently for him to follow her as she moved to one of the shelves, the tether constantly shifting with light when they moved in tandem. 

“Hey,” he called out.

"Find anything?" Sam asked, his voice rough.

Dean exhaled and nodded. "Yeah, I got something. The place where we found the artifact? It was once a temple, but it’s been gone for centuries. Whatever clues were left behind, they’re long gone. But there was this legend tied to the thing. Said you two have to go through some trials-" he pointed to the tether between them, glowing faintly, "-and then use the dagger to cut that."

"The same dagger that disappeared into thin air?" Rowena asked.

"Yeah," Dean confirmed. "Apparently it’s the only thing that can sever it. Instructions are fuzzy after all this time, but that part is clear. No dagger, no breaking the curse.”

Sam sighed, the weight of the situation pressing down on him. "So, at the end of these trials, we find this dagger, and we cut the tether?"

"That's the idea."

Dean pulled out a tattered piece of paper and placed it on the desk, a bunch of strange symbols drawn up on it in a hasty manner. “I found this while I was there. You know what it is?” He turned to Rowena who leaned down to inspect it.

“Aye. It’s a transportation spell. I haven’t seen one quite so intricate before,” she muttered and traced her finger along the drawing. “Judging from this alone, it’s not an everyday curse. This is a kind of magic even I am not familiar with.” She took a deep breath, straightening up. “It’s late. We should rest before going through with a ritual this big.”

“Yeah, okay. That’s a good- wait, how do we…” Sam motioned to the tether.

“We will have to sleep together,” Rowena said simply.

Sam felt his face heat up and he heard Dean spluttering beside him. “I don’t think-”

“Get your head out of the gutter, Samuel, honestly,” Rowena rolled her eyes. “We are sharing a bed strictly in the sleep sense of the word.”

“Oh, yeah. I knew that… yeah.”

With a plan set and agreements to reconvene in the morning, Sam and Rowena made their way to Sam’s bedroom. Gently pushing the door closed behind them Sam found himself unsure of how to proceed without running the risk of getting himself hexed. 

“I could uh, sleep on the floor?”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t want to hear your whining about a sore back all day tomorrow. We will both sleep on the bed. Unless that makes you uncomfortable,” she added with a growing smirk. “Does it, Samuel?”

“Nope,” came his curt reply, looking everywhere but at her.

“Good,” she replied, a trace of warmth in her eyes. “Try not to kick.” And with a last smirk, she moved to claim her side, leaving him to trail after and settle in beside her.

The bed was almost too small for him to begin with, and while Rowena isn’t big by any means, it was a tight fit with both of them on it. There wasn’t a single part of them that wasn't touching the other. Nevertheless, both lay on their back, unmoving and silent, trying to take up as little space as possible. Sam tried his best to remain motionless, his body nearly rigid as he stared up at the ceiling, acutely aware of every little shift beside him.

Rowena was used to being sprawled out in her king sized bed with more room than she knew what to do with. Lying stiff as a board with only an inch or so from the edge of the bed feels… disconcerting. Having her whole right side pressed up against Sam wasn’t doing anything to slow her heartbeat.

The blankets draped over them made her dozy. It wouldn’t take long before she fell asleep, however much she tried to stay awake as long as possible. Part of her was savoring this feeling. Part of her was terrified. She focused on Sam’s steady breathing and felt her eyes droop ever so slightly before forcing them open. The same ritual repeated a few times until her eyes at last remained closed.

When Sam woke up it was to movement. He lifted his hand to rub the sleep from his eyes. At least that was his intent until his arm didn’t respond to his brain. Squinting down he was met with a facefull of red hair. Confusion turned into sheer panic at the realization of who it was in bed with him, before the events of last night rushed back to him.

Taking a moment to breathe in a few calming breaths he tried feeling for his arm again. It was wedged under Rowena who was sprawled across him in a way that he couldn’t move without risking waking her up. She’d somehow taken up most of the bed, her limbs draped over him, her head nestled against his shoulder. He couldn’t help but think it was impressive how much space she managed to claim, given her slight frame.

Small puffs of air hit his neck repeatedly whenever she breathed out. Part of him felt absurdly comfortable, which only made his cheeks burn hotter.

He really had no other choice but to wait for her to wake up; he couldn’t exactly get up and walk out with the tether still keeping them together.

Minutes ticked by and he found himself trying to keep busy. He wiggled his fingers trying to wake up his arm again. He let his eyes wander over the red ringlets spilling across his shoulder, trying to map out patterns in them. He continued drawing mental patterns over her freckles, reaching her eyes blinking back at him. It took him a second to process that she was awake and looking at him with a sleep-addled smile.

“Enjoying yourself?”

He cleared his throat. “Just… waiting for you to wake up.”

She nodded placatingly and extricated herself from him. He watched as she stretched languidly, her arms reaching over her head as she arched her back. 

Suddenly his throat felt very dry. “We should get up. Long day ahead and everything.”

Rowena shot him a luxuriant smile. “Of course.”

As soon as the last symbol was drawn up on the floor, the circle lit up and a humming sound was emitted, filling the quiet room. Sam stepped into it and Rowena was about to follow, but stopped at the stare Dean was giving her.

“What?”

“Nothing,” he raised his hands in surrender, “I’m sure you know better.”

Rowena narrowed her eyes. “Spit it out, Winchester.”

Dean lowered his gaze and she followed it until it landed on her feet. Her shiny black heels caught in the light. “I am perfectly capable of walking in heels.”

“I’ve no doubt about that. But you have no idea what’s waiting for you on the other side. You really want to climb a mountain or swim for miles in high heels?”

Rowena seemed to pause for a second before turning and walking towards her bag, forcing Sam to stumble after her.

“If I didn’t know any better I’d think you were worried about me.”

Dean scoffed. “No way. I’m just making sure you’re on your best game to bring my brother home in one piece. Whatever,” he grumbled as she shot him a wry smile. 

She returned in a sleek pair of combat boots. His confused expression mirrored Sam’s. Where did she even keep those? Did she have them in her bag just in case? She consistently managed to catch him off guard no matter how many strange things he’d seen her do. 

Stepping into the circle again, Sam couldn’t help the small smile that crept up his face; without her heels their height difference was amusing. Not that he’d ever say it out loud - she could knock him on his ass no matter how small she was without problem.

Dean fished out a folded piece of paper from his pocket and read over the words quietly before clearing his throat. “Ready?”

Sam felt his stomach clench at the edge in Dean’s voice. He looked down at Rowena. She gave him a curt nod keeping her eyes locked with his, an unreadable look in them. Dean’s voice recited the strange words. Once. Twice. On the third time the symbols around them lit up surrounding the room in a bright blue light and they had to cover their eyes to keep from being blinded.

The humming grew in intensity. It was almost as if a storm was brewing in the bunker, the air roaring in their ears, a distant high pitched whine accompanying it.

The air stilled.

Both Rowena and Sam jumped at the sound of a sharp snap of fingers piercing the air. Rowena could swear it came from directly beside her, but couldn’t open her eyes because of the still burning light.

And then the ground disappeared from under them.

THE GROVE OF CANDOR

When they found their footing again they were both doubled over, the world spinning around them as they tried to keep down the bile forming in the back of their throats. Sam straightened up first, his eyes taking in their surroundings.

“Wow,” he breathed. Rowena’s eyes trailed over the scenery as well with a guarded curiosity - had she learned anything from her many years on this earth it was that things this beautiful always hid dark and unsightly secrets.

The cavern they stood in looked like a hidden paradise, tucked away beneath the earth, undisturbed by the world around it. Its towering stone walls rose high above, rough and jagged in some places, smooth as polished marble in others. Tendrils of vines clung to the walls, inching upward as if yearning to reach the warm sunlight filtering through the rocky opening above. Sam went to brush his hand through the lush flora that surrounded them, but Rowena seized it before he could. 

“Don’t touch anything.” It was beckoning them, inviting them to touch it, graze it, impossibly green and blooming with far more ferocity than what was expected in such an isolated location. She was sure it had to be magic keeping this place alive.

The air felt humid and alive, thick with the scent of damp earth and the sweet fragrance of different types of flowers, flourishing in the gentle shafts of sunlight that bathed the cavern in a soft, warm glow.

Just a few feet from them the ground disappeared, a chasm wide enough to almost make them lose sight of the bit of ground jutting out from the cliffside from across the divide. They both peered down over the edge. It was as if the earth itself had been torn apart, swallowed by an endless darkness.

“Where are we?”

The words had barely left Sam’s lips before something whizzed past them emitting a high squeaking sound. Rowena’s hand shot out in front of her, aiming directly at the flying creature - was that a squirrel? - muttering a spell under her breath. The magic burned at her fingertips before it fizzled out into nothingness. The creature looked at them with intelligent eyes, and Rowena could swear it was smiling at them.

Sam tilted his head in confusion, and the winged squirrel mirrored his movement, leaning so far to the side that it toppled over in the air before righting itself up again.

“Hello,” Sam tried hesitantly. He glanced over at Rowena momentarily in search of any flicker of recognition. He saw none. That alone was disconcerting. “I’m Sam. This is Rowena. Uh…”

The squirrel blinked once and squeaked before its eyes widened. Purple smoke enveloped it, swirling and expanding as the silhouette of the small animal grew amid it. A hand, equally purple, waved away the dissipating smoke coughing slightly.

“Oh, I’m so sorry! So rude of me to not introduce myself properly - I’m Noxi. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance!”

Rowena attempted her spell once more but it only sparked in the palm of her hand before fading again. Noxi giggled, unconcerned. “That’s so cute, it’s been ages since I’ve seen magic like that! I should tell you - it won’t work as long as you’re in here though. No magic does except my own. But feel free to keep trying!”

Rowena ignored the annoyingly excited voice for a second to take stock of what she was seeing. It was rather a lot to take in. The fairy - what she assumed was a fairy, judging from the translucent wings on her back and the raw amount of magic she seemed to exude - was covered in glitter, glimmering like stardust against her smooth skin, giving her an ethereal, otherworldly aura. Her hair was gathered into a messy updo, strands escaping from their place and framing her face in soft tendrils that fluttered with every movement, as though they had a life of their own. Her dress, made up of several different layers of fabric, some gauzy and others richer in texture, swished around her as she moved. Every inch of her seemed touched by magic.

“Can you tell us where we are?” Sam’s question broke her out of her thoughts.

Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “You’re in the Grove of Candor! And you are here because of that, yes?” She pointed to the glowing tether between them, not waiting for a response before continuing. “I am here to guide you through the trials to come! I can’t help too much of course, but I’m here for moral support and all that.” She was talking a mile a minute, words tumbling out from her lips at a  rapid pace, gesticulating wildly as she spoke.

It was hard to concentrate enough as it was with all the new information  shoved in their faces, but Sam found himself even more intrigued at the patchwork of accents that coloured Noxi’s speech. He caught the faintest bit of Russian in there, German intonation at certain words, and he was sure he’d heard some British in there as well.

“What are we doing here?” Rowena pressed.

“Well, the name kinda gives it away, but… to get across,” she pointed to the other side of the chasm, “you need to tell the truth. Build a bridge of trust between you, so to speak.”

Rowena glanced sideways at Sam, an eyebrow raised skeptically. “And what if we’re not feeling terribly truthful at the moment?”

Noxi laughed, floating backward in a swirl of colored smoke. “Then you’re more than welcome to stay right here!”

“What if we don’t make it?” Sam found himself asking even though he dreaded the answer. “Are we just stuck here forever?”

“Exactly. It’s a one and done kind of deal. But it’s really fine; if you don’t succeed you can always make me some company! I wouldn’t mind someone new to talk to, the other visitors haven’t been feeling very chatty lately.” As she said this she waved her hand and piles upon piles of skeletons appeared, haphazardly stacked across the ground. Their bony forms lay crumpled as if they'd been there for centuries, their empty eye sockets staring lifelessly at Sam and Rowena.

“I usually keep them hidden. Wouldn’t want to scare away every guest who stumbles through here, after all. Not very homely, you know?”

"How considerate of you."

"I do try," Noxi beamed.

“So,” Sam cut in, brows furrowed in confusion, “we just… tell the truth?”

She nodded enthusiastically.

“Easy enough; let’s just get this over with. One plus one is two. The earth is round. Water is wet,” Rowena rattled off. Nothing happened.

Noxi fluttered down a little. “It doesn’t work like that, silly.”

Rowena let out a long sigh, glancing away with a look of pure disdain. “If you’re aiming to get on my nerves, congratulations - you’ve succeeded.”

Her fingers itched for the dormant magic to be let out. Sam held back his laugh and stepped in quickly to deescalate before Noxi annoyed Rowena enough to warrant a murder attempt.

“Then what kind of truth do we need to tell?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” She paused expectantly as if waiting for an answer, and this time Sam had to physically grab Rowena’s wrist to keep her from moving up to the fairy. Noxi sighed dramatically. “Well duh, it can’t be any truth. It has to be a truth of the heart. Something you would never share otherwise.”

Oh.

The silence that followed was deafening, only broken by Noxi conveniently snapping herself away from existence.

“No- wait! How- we still don’t know how we’re supposed to get to the other side,” Rowena called after the now gone fairy. “Are we supposed to build a bloody bridge by hand?”

Sam hesitated for a moment before clearing his throat. They really had no other choice but to figure it out as they went. “Alright, uh… spiders. Can’t stand them.” he suppressed a shiver at the thought of them. “Seriously, I- look, I know we’ve fought ghosts, and demons and all kinds of messed up shit, but there’s just… something about them. The way they just move so fast and disappear before you where they went. Can’t deal with it,” he fumbled to justify himself at Rowena’s look of pure disbelief.

“You cannot be serious? Tell me you are joking, Samuel.” Rowena threw her hands up in the air, the tether flaring. “A truth of the heart . You consider that to be enough?”

He refrained from making a snide comment. They needed to work together to get out of this, and riling her up even more wasn’t going to help them in any way. “Okay,” he racked his brain for something he could say. “Oh! Okay, I still have a few journals from when I was younger hidden away somewhere. Full of sketches and plans for, you know… a different kind of life,” he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. “Dreams and stuff.”

Rowena raised an eyebrow. “I think it has to be something a little more substantial, darling,” she drawled, folding her arms. 

“Well, you seem to know exactly what needs to be said. Why don’t you try?” He let out, his frustration building. He wasn’t really angry at her. Just nervous. And anxious. So anxious. They were in a completely alien place, with no idea what to do or when - if - they’d be able to go home. “You want to talk about your darkest secrets? How about we talk about your trust issues? Or how you push away everyone who gets just a little too close?”

The second the words were out of his mouth he regretted them. He received a scathing glare before she schooled her expression again. Yeah, he definitely deserved that.

“Attachment’s a luxury I stopped affording myself centuries ago. Just one fewer heartache to worry about. Call it efficiency; why wait around when I know exactly how it ends?”

Her words left an aching feeling in his heart. He searched her face for anything, something to tell him what was going on in her head. “I’m sorry. That was unfair.”

She let out a hollow laugh. He hated it. He wanted to make it better, to take it back, but he could only watch as her walls came up slightly higher than before. “Well, you haven’t pushed me away. I’d definitely call that progress,” he gave her a small smile in hopes of easing the tension.

Rowena couldn’t help but let her expression soften a little. Damn him and his charming smile. “Don’t flatter yourself, Samuel. I don’t really have much of a choice now, do I?” she gestured down to the tether before meeting his eyes again.

A rumbling sound filled the cavern and they both watched as a broad piece of stone started growing out of the stone floor, extending for a few feet in the direction of the other side of the chasm before stopping.

The revelation of how they were supposed to make it out of here dawned on them simultaneously, anger and frustrations forgotten for a celebratory moment, before the realization of what they really had to do set in. This was not going to be pleasant for either of them.

Rowena kept her eyes trained on the drop off in front of them without uttering another word. The words already shared had been enough to slam her walls up again, trying to maintain any semblance of control she was left with.

Sam knew they needed to work together to get out of here. He knew Rowena would have to eventually say something whether she wanted to or not, but maybe he could make it just a little easier for her. If he made the first move he could maybe ease her into it. As agonizing as it was bound to be, he exhaled deeply and opened his mouth. Then closed it again.

He repeated the process a few times, and each time the knot in his stomach grew.

“I used to have an… addiction of sorts. Demon blood,” he averted his gaze at her questioning look. “I don’t anymore. But, sometimes I think things would be easier if I just, gave in, I guess.” He shrugged. Rowena didn’t speak, just watched him intently, letting him find the words. “We are so far down this path, this life. There is so much at stake,” he let out a frustrated sigh. He could have gotten so much more use of them now, rather than almost a decade ago when they’d been potent. He had found himself going down this trail of thought more than once, when things had heated up and the stakes had gotten higher. How many times would it have possibly prevented someone he loved from getting hurt? How many innocents could he have saved if they had just been a few steps ahead?

It was a small price to pay. He could deal with the addiction - maybe even control it to his advantage - if it meant they had the extra help. But he never let himself dwell on it too long. He knew it wasn’t an option. Knew how Dean would react if he ever voiced his thoughts out loud. So he kept them to himself. Safe and hidden from everyone. Well, almost everyone now.

Rowena’s eyes trailed over him. His shame over what he was saying was clear even with his face halfway turned away. And really, how much could you hide from a person standing less than six feet from you? His words settled heavy on her chest, restricting her next inhale uncomfortably. The inexplicable urge to reassure him rose steadily.

“Power is tempting,” she said and watched as his head turned imperceptibly her way, “but it doesn’t always give you what you think it will. I’m the perfect example.” She paused, pushing down her doubt. There was no point in holding back now. “I have sought power all my life, thinking it would help me solve all my problems, give me a better life. Yet, here I am with more power in my possession than I thought ever possible… and where did it get me? Alone. I pushed everyone away, tainted every relationship I’ve ever had. Even with-” her voice caught in her throat, “even with my son.”

Sam had turned to face her fully now, listening with such rapt attention that it almost made her uncomfortable by how exposed she felt. “I don’t believe you sacrificing your sanity is going to bring you the aid you think. The thing about power is that by the time you realize it’s led you somewhere dark, it’s already taken too much from you to turn back.” 

He fell silent at that. His thoughts were a whirlwind of emotions, all vying for his attention at once.

“Besides, I shouldn’t really be surprised by your self sacrificial tendencies anymore; you Winchesters always had a melodramatic streak.”

He barked out a sudden laugh that tumbled out of his mouth. Rowena couldn’t help the satisfied smirk grazing her lips. The next part of the bridge materialized without them really paying it any attention.

“For what it’s worth,” Sam started once his laughter died down, “I think there’s worse places for you to have ended up in right now.”

“Aye, you’re right. Being cuffed to you is every girl’s dream,” she replied wryly.

Sam shot her a suggestive look. “Well…”

He barely dodged the well aimed swat on his arm.

The bridge was now a good ten feet long and they walked onto it cautiously, as if waiting for it to crumble and let them fall into the endless darkness underneath.

It took another ten minutes of silence before either of them spoke. The air had grown somber again, both sifting through the right words to say.

They were walking a precarious edge, and it made Rowena uneasy. But hearing him share something so personal… she owed him at least to try and get them out of here. If he could trust her with that, something that no doubt cost him to admit, then she owed him a moment of honesty, too.

“There was this man,” she started cautiously, keeping her voice level. “We found each other by sheer luck. He was the most kindhearted man I’d ever met.” Ewan had been her first real love. The first time she had felt that this could be it. Her happy ending. “He adored me, made me laugh, had the gentlest soul. I loved him. And I… I ran away,” she forced out. “Things were good- too good, it was only a matter of time before something went wrong. I left him a note and never looked back.” She could remember clear as day how she had become more and more apprehensive, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Experience had taught her that nothing good ever lasted, and that little reprieve she had been sure had already gone past its expiration date. “I do wonder what happened to him. I don’t regret a lot of things, but this- this is one thing I wish I could change, you know?”

Sam did know, intimately. “I knew a girl once. Her name was Amelia. We ended up moving in together and adopting a dog. It didn’t really work out in the end. I had to choose between her and Dean, and I chose Dean,” he dragged a hand through his hair. “Some days, the really bad ones, I regret not staying with her. It’s not even that it was her , I just… maybe I could’ve had a normal life that way.”

The twinge of jealousy her heart emitted was shoved down with almost mechanical ease before it could take root, along with the fleeting images of if it had been her and Sam. Her and Sam and a house just outside of the city. Maybe she’d even let him keep the dog. She kept quiet.

Another part of the bridge formed out of thin air, bringing them one step closer to freedom.

They had stopped keeping count of how long they’d been speaking. By now the things that slipped past their lips were an afterthought, too mentally exhausted to really care what they were saying.

They stood near the edge of the latest piece of ground that had materialized.

“We could make it if we jump far enough.”

“I am not plummeting to my death because you think we can make a ten foot jump, Samuel,” Rowena replied. Silence enveloped them once more like a thick blanket. If they attempted to jump now they would most definitely end up off kilter because of the tether, one of them getting yanked back from the cliff to drag the other with them down.

It was a cruel thing, to be forced to peel away layer after layer of oneself, leaving them both feeling exhausted and exposed. Things she never thought - hoped - Sam would find out about her were forced out in the open, the ugly truth revealed. After years of meticulously crafting her persona and concealing the darkest parts of herself, all of it came crashing down in just a few hours. In front of the one person that had seen her for the woman long forgotten behind the walls she’d built around herself, no less.

Sam sneaked a careful look at Rowena. She was stubbornly keeping her eyes locked forward, her shoulders set and chin lifted up in defiance. He didn’t push. Didn’t ask. He had no desire to take away what little dignity she had left. 

They only needed another truth to be able to safely make it to the other side. It was so close, and he so badly wanted to spare her the pain of revealing yet another piece of herself that she didn’t want to offer up willingly. She had taken from the world, things that weren’t hers, but the world had taken from her first. Taken too much.

His mind swirled with something - anything - to say, searching every corner of his mind but coming up empty handed. He ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. He had nothing left to give. Nothing except the one thing he’d been dancing around for the better part of the last few years, refusing to acknowledge it.

It was his last resort. He’d spent so long pushing it down, telling himself it was just a strong connection built from the shared experiences between friends. However tentative that friendship was.

He could lie all he wanted to the people around him; lying to himself was a bit harder. Rowena had made quite an impression from the start, and he would’ve maybe kept his distance if he knew how messy his feelings were going to get around her. But he didn’t, and now he was standing on the edge of a magically energized bridge, looking over into the abyss, with the woman he- with someone he had come to care for deeply.

They only needed one more truth, strong enough to give them a few feet of ground. Rowena was eyeing the distance as well, her jaw tense. Sam steeled himself. This was it. They needed to gain ground, and he had one hell of a truth to help them. Even if it might push her away for good, or make her straight up laugh in his face. If it could get them - her - out of here, he would. No matter how much the outcome would hurt. At least they could deal with it somewhere relatively safer.

Each heartbeat felt like a countdown, echoing in his ears. He battled with himself, gathering up the courage to open his mouth just to close it a second later. Cursing himself out for being a coward, for not being able to tell her what they needed to get them to the other side.

“You know,” Rowena’s voice was subdued, cutting off Sam before he could even begin, “helping you boys... it was never part of my plan.” She refused to look at him, staring straight ahead. She refused to see the pity in his eyes as the next words left her mouth. If they were going to potentially die here it wouldn’t matter anyway that he knew. Maybe a part of her wanted him to know. Wanted to hear the words back. Maybe she was hoping for confirmation that she had made the right choice for once, helping these infuriating brothers. Oh how far she’d fallen. “But it’s been… a while, and I can't say I entirely hate it.” The words hung heavy between them. Sam felt a warmth spreading in his chest, a stark contrast to Rowena’s cold dread at the confession.

There was no movement. Rowena’s heart dropped; it hadn’t been enough. They were inches from freedom, and she couldn’t get them there. She had said those words with Sam just inches from her, and it wasn’t enough. She could have screamed out of rage at that moment.

“Just give it a second,” Sam attempted to reassure her, seeing her tense up. “C’mon,” he muttered.

Another beat.

A soft rumble had them both releasing a breath as they watched the ground in front of them extend further, almost bridging the gap between them and the other side.

“Yes!”

There was still a small gap between the bridge and the cliffside, but neither had the desire to keep talking anymore. They jumped across, careful to move at the same time, and landed on the soft grass. 

Rowena closed her eyes in relief that it was over. The words still hung heavy between them, the silence suffocating. She might not be able to take back what had been said, but she could make sure she was in control of what was said from here on out.

“Rowena-”

“We are not having this conversation right now,” Rowena said promptly, cutting off his attempt of easing the growing tension, deliberately avoiding his hurt-puppy gaze.

Whatever Sam wanted to say died in his throat at the same lurching feeling they had in the bunker, and a snap echoed around them.

The ground beneath their feet shifted. Rowena glanced at Sam, eyes wide in brief alarm, but before either could say a word, the world around them began to warp. Colors blurred together, the ground dissolving beneath them like sand swept away by the wind.

They could just make out Noxi smiling broadly in front of them before the world went black.

THE TOWER OF RECKONING

The world lurched once again as the snapping sound echoed painfully loud in their ears. Thankfully, the nausea didn’t last as long this time around, though it was far from pleasant.

“Do you have to keep doing that?” Sam complained, his hands pressing against his temple to quell the dizziness.

“Welcome back!” Noxi paid no mind to him. “Oh, I’m so happy you guys made it! There haven’t been many to pass through here, they just get stuck on the first trial,” she pouted before lighting up again. “But now you are here!”

Sam gave the room a once over, looking for a starting point. The chamber stretched up above them, the ceiling barely visible in the dim light. Suspended in the air like a twisted obstacle course were crates, planks, ropes, and jagged rocks, hanging at various heights, all seemingly held aloft by invisible forces.

Noxi snapped her fingers again, bringing Sam back to attention, and they felt something cold enclose their wrists. 

“What-”

A metal chain hung limply between them from where it was cuffed around one of their wrists, jingling as they moved. Rowena couldn’t help the cackle that escaped her.

“Well, isn’t this just the cherry on top of our lovely little predicament? A magical leash wasn’t sufficient enough for you?” Rowena asked. She didn’t really wait for an answer or expect one really - at least not one that wouldn’t make her want to pull her hair out. “What are we supposed to do now? Climb our way up?” Noxi’s too enthusiastic smile made her pause. “You cannot be serious.”

“You just have to make it up there,” she pointed to the very top where there was a hatch on the stone ceiling, half hidden behind creeping vines. “I’ll be watching! Good luck!” She snapped her fingers again and disappeared.

“We are quite literally cuffed together! How are we supposed to-” Rowena shouted after the purple smoke in vain. “She’s got to stop doing that!”

The length of the chain gave them some freedom, enough to navigate around obstacles or take staggered steps, but it constantly clinked and rattled, reminding them of the even more limited distance they could move from each other.

He nodded to a sturdy looking box to his right. “I guess we just start?”

Their significant size difference was proving to be more of a nuisance than they thought. Something as simple as walking would leave them scrambling to find a rhythm that didn’t end with Rowena tugging back at the chain around her wrist in annoyance. Unfortunately, walking was the easiest part of what was to come.

Sam hopped up awkwardly onto the wooden box, the metal chafing against both of their wrists when he reached down to help her up as well. There was another crate suspended just above to the right. He reached up to grab it.

“Ow- wait! Sam, stop moving!” Rowena hissed, her voice tight with frustration as the chain jerked her forward. She stumbled, her wrist yanked painfully upwards as Sam's larger stride dragged her off balance. Forced onto her toes, Rowena’s arm stretched uncomfortably above her head, straining to match his height. Her body twisted awkwardly as she struggled to avoid being completely pulled off her feet. 

“Oh shit! Sorry!” Sam quickly pulled his hand down to alleviate her discomfort, a sheepish smile playing on his lips.

“Of all the people to get stuck with, I got the bumbling moose,” Rowena huffed rubbing her wrist.

“I didn’t exactly choose this either. Let’s just make it out of here and you won’t have to see me for a whole year.”

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep. You boys won’t last a week without asking for my help when we get back,” she retorted, her tone lacking any real bite. It really was concerning how quick she was to forgive him. She could hold a grudge like no one - had held several of them for decades - but Sam somehow managed to slip through the cracks. She took a calming breath; she did not have the energy nor the time for this right now.

“We need to work out a system. No more moving without communicating.” 

Sam cowered a little at the look she shot him. “How about you go up first when we climb? I can lift you up and then climb myself.”

Rowena looked affronted at the mere idea.

“It’s the fastest way! And the least painful for both of us. I don’t-”

A snapping sound alerted them of Noxi’s arrival. “Hi again! You are both doing very well!” She exclaimed loudly before casting a nervous look around, leaning in to whisper as if telling them a secret. “I would pick up the pace if I were you.” Her eyes flickered down wordlessly before snapping herself out of the chamber again. Both Rowena and Sam followed where she’d looked, and Sam felt his breath hitch.

“I will strangle that little fairy myself when we get out of this,” Rowena muttered. “Well, what are you waiting for, Samuel? A formal invitation? Move!” She motioned for him to lift her up and he obeyed quickly. He hoisted her up to grab the edge of the crate and hopped up to grab it himself beside her. They both got on top of it with much less fuss.

Below them the ground bubbled as the acid hissed, eating away at the floor, the thick, greenish-yellow liquid slithering between cracks in the stone, foaming as it consumed everything in its path. With every few feet of height they gained, the acid continued its slow ascent, following them tauntingly.

“There!” Rowena pointed at the chain swaying towards them, and then away again. “We can use it to swing over to the crate over there.”

Sam wipes his hands on his jeans; the last thing he wanted to do was drop them a hundred feet down into a pool of acid. He grabbed the chain the next time it swung their way and wrapped it around his hand. Turning back to Rowena he paused.

“Uh… do you want… how do we…?” His hand hovered uncertainly in midair, unsure of whether to help her climb onto him or let her do it herself. He wasn’t sure which was more degrading, really.

Rowena felt her cheeks flush. “For God’s sake,” she muttered and tugged him down a little lower, grabbing onto his arm. With a little boost she jumped up, wrapping her legs around his middle as a furious blush crept up her face.

“A little to the left - that’s okay,” he adjusted her weight on his hip. “Just—try not to strangle me, yeah?” He felt the arms around his neck loosen up slightly.

With the position they now were in, Rowena’s face was close enough that her nose bumped against his cheek.

For just a moment the world shrunk down to just the two of them. The distant hiss of the rising acid and the creak of the chain faded away, leaving only the sound of their breathing. Her eyes flickered up to meet his, and the fire that stirred within her felt just as foreign as the warmth of his skin against hers.

It was hard to see in the dim light of the chamber, but Rowena’s eyes seemed to almost glow. His heart pounded in his chest, unsure if it was because of the adrenaline from what they were doing, or from the sudden closeness of her. He swallowed, suddenly aware of how his chest tightened, of the heat between them that had nothing to do with the rising acid.

“Don’t drop me,” she warned, shaking them both out of their daze.

He adjusted her once more before walking up to the edge. “Not planning on it,” he replied, voice tight as he kicked off, the chain creaking as they swung.

His muscles coiled and strained as he held them both up. Her body was pressed tightly against his, her breath hot against his cheek.

The crate was coming up fast to meet them. Sam knew he had to let go at the last possible second because of the angle, holding his breath as he released the chain. They were suspended in the air momentarily, moving forward with the same speed and for a moment he thought they had overshot it. But then his feet touched solid wood and he stumbled once before righting himself, Rowena moving down from his arms.

“I can’t believe that worked,” he said, amazed. 

The chain rattled as it swung back again out of sight. A low rumbling from above them made them freeze in their celebration. A stack of crates perched perilously on a narrow ledge, teetering on the verge of falling. Time slowed as the top crate tipped forward, bringing with it the rest of them. They tumbled down in a violent cascade directly at them. 

Had Rowena had her magic she would’ve easily deflected them with a flick of her wrist. But she didn’t, and the crates were plummeting towards them at breakneck speed. She froze. They had nowhere to go. The space they were standing on was already precariously small; one small misstep would send them over the edge.

She almost wanted to laugh at the absurdity of the situation. She had survived for so long - centuries of outwitting enemies, defying the odds, and mastering survival - only to be undone by something as mundane as gravity and poorly stacked crates? Death had flirted with her in many forms, but never had it felt so insultingly mundane.

She could still feel the warmth of Sam’s hand, resting on the small of her back as he too looked up, unmoving. His jaw was clenched, stray wisps of hair clung to his sweat-dampened forehead, framing his face in a way that made him look younger. In that dim, flickering light, he seemed almost larger than life. It startled her that she found, in a life as long and strange as hers, this wasn’t the worst way to go.

As the crates hurtled closer she instinctively closed her eyes, waiting for the impact. An impact that never came. Instead, she felt Sam moving, hauling her closer, his body curling around hers as he pushed them both down to kneel. His hand gripped the ledge on either side of her, his fingers turning white from the force.

Sam didn’t register what he was doing until the sharp bloom of pain exploded on his back. His arms wrapped around Rowena, pulling her into him as he twisted down, positioning himself between her and the chaos above. The crates splintered against the stone and every piece of debris struck like a hammer blow, but he held his ground, the world narrowing to just a single thought; keep her safe. His muscles coiled tightly, on fire as he tried to keep them both steady when the crate wobbled in the air, almost sending them off the edge more than once.

Though neither of them saw it, the tether between them burned just a little brighter for a moment.

They remained still even after the last crate fell. Only their heavy breathing could be heard over the blood rushing in their ears. When Sam was sure there weren’t any more crates, he slowly uncurled himself from Rowena, trying to ignore the stinging pain in his back from what probably was the world's worst case of splinters. At least nothing felt broken; he could deal with a few scratches and bruises.

“You okay?”

Rowena opened her mouth and closed it again, no sound coming out. “You are an idiot, Samuel Winchester,” she managed.

“I’ll take that as a thank you.”

A crate further down sizzled and was slowly submerged. While they were distracted by the imminent danger of the crates, the acid was now a bubbling mass just a few feet below them, the once slow-rising tide now licking the base of the crate they stood on. 

“We should-”

“Yeah!”

Sam hoisted Rowena up to the next crate and climbed onto it himself just as the one they were standing on dissolved completely. They could both feel it—their bodies growing heavier, each movement slower than the last. The burn of exhaustion settled into their muscles, but neither dared admit it - they had to keep going. Their breaths were running ragged, their fingers sore from clutching at whatever handholds they could find.

Twice, Sam almost lost his balance, his foot slipping, almost dragging them both off-kilter. Then, Rowena nearly tumbled over the edge when her grip faltered, saved only by Sam’s quick reaction as he hauled her back, his chest heaving with the effort. Their movements became jagged, desperate as they pushed forward, knowing they were running out of both time and energy.

Rowena’s eyes darted upward for a second and her heart leapt in her throat. “The hatch!” she yelled, urgency flooding her voice, and pointed to their only way out - it was only a few feet above them, tantalizingly close yet just out of reach.

“Here,” Sam crouched low, his hands bracing as Rowena climbed onto his shoulders. She wobbled slightly before finding her balance.

"Careful," Sam muttered, gripping her thigh with his free hand to steady her.

Rowena shifted her weight, her hands scrambling for a hold on the hatch above. "If you could stand still so I can actually - ugh." She stretched out her arm, the cuff on her wrist tugging against Sam’s, forcing him to raise his own arm awkwardly in the air, giving her the room she needed.

He winced as his muscles strained, holding steady under her weight. “Yeah, well, if you’d stop moving…”

Sam fought to keep steady as she worked on the hatch. The wood creaked as Rowena pushed against it, her arm trembling from the effort.

“You have it?” He grunted, locking himself in place as best he could to keep them from moving.

“Almost…” her voice was laced with concentration, “I need both hands!” Sam lifted his cuffed hand in the air as far as he could, giving Rowena both of her hands to work freely with and push them both flat against the worn surface of the hatch.

“Come on!” she shouted in frustration.

Her arms burned with the effort. With one final heave the hatch groaned and began to give way, the sound echoing in the chamber.

Sam wasted no time lowering Rowena off of his shoulders. Without a word, he grabbed the edge of the hatch and hoisted himself up first, mindful of both the chain and the tether.

Rowena raised an eyebrow. “So much for chivalry,” she muttered under her breath.

Hanging half out of the hatch, Sam glanced down at her. “Would you rather drag me up? ‘Cause I think we’d be here till the next century.”

She gave him a narrow look, clearly displeased but unwilling to give him the satisfaction of a full argument. Sam reached down, offering his cuffed hand to hers. Rowena clasped it, and he pulled her up with little effort.

With a swift kick to the wooden hatch he slammed it over the exit, watching the acid that was bubbling just below it disappear.

It was too dark to make out where exactly they were but they doubted they’d stay here for long, already anticipating Noxi’s return. Soon enough the familiar snapping sound echoed.

“You guys did so good! I’m so impressed!” She hovered above them, wings fluttering excitedly, grinning widely at them. “There’s no time to waste; onto the last trial!”

Rowena bit back a snide comment opting to brace herself, anticipating the now-familiar way the world started spinning around them, warping and morphing until it no longer was.

THE HALL OF MIRRORS

The first thing she noticed wasn’t the vaulted ceiling, so high that it disappeared into the shadows above, or the stained glass windows that were just as tall, letting the silvery beams of moonlight filter through, illuminating the dust motes that drifted lazily in the light. It wasn’t the mirrors scattered around the room either. Some grand, framed in intricate gold or dark, twisting iron, standing proudly in full view. Others, smaller, tucked into corners as though they were secrets waiting to be uncovered. 

No, it was the fact that she was alone. After being forced to keep close to each other for hours on end, it was jarring to suddenly find the space beside her empty. A quick look down at her chest confirmed her fear - the tether was barely visible, flickering like a dying ember. The farther away from her body it got the more it faded, stretching out towards nothing.

“Noxi!”

The fairy appeared from her familiar cloud of swirling smoke. “Ooh, you’re really getting close to the end now,” she sang. 

“Where is Sam?” she asked impatiently.

“He’s doing the same thing you are. If you both pass it you will be reunited again on the other side.” Without another word she produced a rock from behind her back and offered it to Rowena with a flourish. 

She furrowed her brows. “What am I supposed to do with this?”

Noxi’s gaze shifted pointedly towards the rows of mirrors filling the chamber, gleaming faintly under the moonlight.

“I just break the mirrors?” she asked in disbelief.

Noxi smiled kindly. “Not exactly.” She fluttered down to one of the mirrors, pulling away the sheet draped over it and letting it fall to the floor in a heap. “You will be offered something few get in their lifetime; a chance to choose your fate.” She gestured for Rowena to step closer.

As she did she caught a glimpse of herself in the reflection, her previously pristine clothes grimy, smudges and scratches marring her pale skin. The glass shimmered and she had to blink to realize what she was seeing, the image slowly warping into something else.

It was still her - the same sharp features, that same familiar posture. But now she stood tall, draped in flowing robes of dark, shimmering fabrics that seemed to dance around her as she moved. The Book of the Damned floated just beside her. Power radiated from her - raw, untamed. Endless. Rowena could see it, feel it , through the glass, saw it flickering before her vision; entire forests bent to her will, storms raging and calming with a flick of her wrist, whole civilisations at her command.

“You could have all the power you wish for. Every wrong you have suffered could be avenged with a mere thought.” Noxi’s voice was muffled, as if underwater. “All you have to do is step through.”

Rowena tore her eyes away from the mirror. The image faded. The hollowness in her chest left her feeling confused. There was a time this goal had fueled her every action. She didn’t find it to be so true anymore.

“What is the point of this?” Rowena snapped, her patience wearing thin, frustration gnawing at her as she glared at Noxi.

Noxi gestured lightly to the room around them, her smile never faltering. "There’s only one mirror in here that reveals your true desire. The life you want most of all. Even if you won’t admit it to yourself." She whispered the last part, watching Rowena closely. "Every mirror is here to tempt you. Withstand the temptation and break the real mirror, and you’ll be reunited with your lovely friend again.”

Her heart clenched involuntarily at the thought of Sam. What was he being shown? What visions was he being tortured with, forced to stand and witness.

She flickered through countless versions of herself, the mirrors shimmering with faint images, beckoning her closer. She was Queen of Hell, ruling Hell itself with and remaking it in her image. She was part of the Coven, not kicked out, but revered. Respected. She belonged. So many versions of herself with unimaginable power. For so long she had craved power, and now the temptation was undeniable.

She walked along the rows and rows of reflections, gazing upon all that could be, but it was never enough to make her stop more than a few seconds before moving onto the next. Until she passed a smaller mirror. The frame wasn’t embellished or carved with fine details. In fact it was rather insignificant looking, and yet it was drawing her in with an almost magnetic pull.

When the image crystallized her hand flew up instinctively to touch the glass and stopped herself at the last second.

She was looking at herself again, but beside her was a young boy. His features were soft, hair framing his face in gentle waves. He was laughing at something, tugging on her arm and the version of herself in the mirror looked down on him with a smile. The softness and adoration in those eyes - those same eyes she had spent centuries seeing in the mirror, watching the hate and anger in them grow - felt misplaced.

“You can have another chance with your son again. Watch him grow up,” Noxi spoke softly. “Do things right by him this time.”

She swallowed hard, her throat constricting as emotions surged up from places she had buried deep. The desire to reach through the glass, to feel the weight of his small hand in hers, to hear his laughter fill the silence, was overwhelming.

With trembling hands, Rowena reached out to touch the surface of her mirror, her fingertips brushing the glass as the alternate version of her smiled back. 

“What happens if I step through?”

Noxi smiled understandingly. “You won’t remember a thing. You will be able to lead the life you’ve chosen without the burden of guilt. A fresh start.” And with that she vanished from view, leaving Rowena to stare at the moment frozen in time in front of her.

The words slammed into her, cutting through the haze and she yanked her hand away as if burned. Whatever had happened, whatever choices she had made, whatever losses she had suffered couldn’t be erased, not like this. The memories, the scars, the mistakes - they were hers. They had shaped her, hardened her, and maybe even broken her in ways she couldn’t fully grasp. But they made her into what she was, and she knew she wasn’t about to live out the rest of her days in an illusion, puppeteered by some unearthly force. Unknowingly or not.

Every mirror felt like a trap, showing her lives she no longer wanted, tugging at desires she had long buried. She was tired of being toyed with. 

The revelation of this monumental opportunity had her thoughts running back to Sam, and with it a creeping sense of doubt. She could only imagine how alluring all of this could be. For someone like Sam, who had carried the burden of sacrifice for so long, how tempting would it be to finally have peace? What if he chose this? What if she came out on the other side and he wasn’t there? She loathed how much she sounded like a scared little girl, her thoughts quickly pushed down again.

A sigh of frustration echoed in the chamber and Rowena moved to the next mirror. A tattered sheet hung loosely over the frame, covering the glass. With a swift motion she pulled it off and had to turn her face from the cloud of dust that rose.

It took a second for the image to clear. It wasn’t what she expected—no throne, no armies, no dark magic swirling around her. Instead, she saw a small living room bathed in the soft golden light of sunset. The scene was peaceful, almost mundane.

A fire crackled softly in the hearth, casting a flickering glow across the room, their light dancing on the walls which were lined with shelves overflowing with old books, trinkets, and framed photographs. Each one seemed to tell a story, filling the space with the quiet hum of a life well-lived.

She and Sam were swaying gently to the tune of an indistinct song, Sam’s arms wrapped around her. In the reflection, Rowena’s face was different - her usual guarded expression replaced with one of pure contentment. She looked at Sam with a kind of peace she had long forgotten she could feel, her eyes soft, untroubled. 

Rowena let her eyes wander over the scene, her heart clenching. The pull she felt to this image, this strange familiarity, was stronger. Like she yearned for something she had long convinced herself she couldn’t have. 

Sam spun her around behind the glass, laughing at something she couldn’t hear.

She had always prided herself on being an enigmatic woman, a mystery wrapped in layers of charm and cunning few could decipher. Yet here she stood, staring into a mirror that had unraveled her with unsettling ease. She might as well have been holding a flashing neon sign, her innermost desires shamelessly displayed for all to see. For all her power, for all her carefully constructed facades, the mirror had figured her out in a heartbeat.

“Well, isn’t this just lovely," she drawled, not really sure who she was talking to. "Apparently I’m as transparent as a bloody window.”

The stone felt burning in her hand, gripping it tightly in a raised hand over her head. She averted her gaze, pointedly looking away from the scene in front of her - she certainly wouldn’t give the satisfaction to whoever had made this torture chamber of watching her break her own heart. 

She smashed the mirror in a single, decisive blow. Glass shattered and crumbled to reveal a door behind it. Without another glance, Rowena stepped forward, pushing it open and entering the room beyond.

Sam paced the room anxiously, his mind swirling as he tried to shake the weight of everything he had just seen. The images kept flickering behind his eyes, a dancing storm of what-ifs and could-have-beens.

“Get a grip,” he muttered to himself, dragging a hand over his face. Noxi had been clear on what he had to do. That didn’t mean he knew where to begin. He glanced at the mirror beside him. The colour of the frame had long faded and the carvings gentled by years of hands running over them. 

The image still played behind the glass. He could see Amelia’s hair shining in the sun and her rounded belly was protruding under the flowing dress she had on her, billowing in the wind. He stood beside her, a revering smile on his lips. A dog was weaving between their legs - Riot.

Behind him was another mirror, smaller, the glass tarnished. He and Dean were on a road trip. The Impala rolled down an endless highway, the sun low on the horizon. No hunting, no monsters—just the two of them, windows down, music playing. The promise of the normal life they never really got nearly had him reaching through the mirror, but he averted his gaze before he could convince himself it could be worth it.

He didn’t know how long he’d been there. Ten minutes? An hour? Time didn’t seem to follow the laws it did on their own plane of existence. His thoughts wandered to Rowena.

So far he had found it easy to dismiss the promises that were flaunted before him - all of it had been nothing more than glittering distractions. Until he had come to stand in front of two near identical mirrors. They stood side by side, deliberately placed as if to twist the knife just a little deeper. 

Two moments, seemingly frozen in time, battled for his attention.

His mom’s eyes stared back at him. His dad was there too, looking younger, his hard edges softened by the absence of hunting. 

And then there was Dean. He and Sam were just kids, full of life, chasing each other around the backyard of their old house. His younger self tackled Dean to the ground, both of them collapsing into fits of silent laughter, their dad calling out to them while their mom watched with a smile. It was everything he had dreamed of - the family that had been ripped away before he even had the chance to know it fully.

The mirror next to it included just two people. Him… and Rowena. Sam stood in a sunlit kitchen, the soft glow of dawn filtering through the windows. Rowena was beside him, moving around with a relaxed ease. She wore an elegant summer dress, her red hair falling loosely down her back, looking more at home than he had ever seen her. The two of them moved in sync, like they'd done this a hundred times before. Maybe they had where they were.

His eyes kept wandering back and forth between the two mirrors, unsure of what to do. More times than he’d like to admit, the idea of what it would be like to get a chance - not only for him, but for her as well - at an ordinary life had him up at night, envisioning a future that couldn’t happen. For all he knew that could be the mirror that was attempting to lure him in - it was working too well for his liking. 

On the other hand he had been dreaming about a life with his family away from all the hunting business, where his mom was alive and John was like a dad should be, and he and Dean could grow up without having known the pain and loss he knew now. Dean had done so much for their family - however small or fractured it had been - always making sure to put family first. Every sacrifice, every fight, every sleepless night had been for them. For Sam.

One promised an unattainable future, the other an impossible past. Sam could feel the pull from both, each tempting him with a different kind of happiness - one built on hope, the other on longing. He could feel his heart tearing in two, caught between a life that could have been and a life that still might be.

With a deep breath he steeled himself, the weight of the decision pressing heavy on his chest. His fingers wrapped tightly around the small stone in his pocket, the rough surface grounding him for just a moment longer.

With one last exhale he hurled the stone at the mirror.

The image of him and Dean wrestling in the backyard cracked into a million pieces, the glass now showing nothing more than his own fractured reflection in the scattered pieces on the floor.

Sam breathed a sigh of relief when the door opened up to the sight of Rowena waiting for him. They were in a smaller chamber now with one big window and another identical door to the one he had walked through on the other side of the room.

As soon as they were close enough, the tether sprang to life again, glowing bright and vividly before weaving itself together.

Their eyes met and the pure unadulterated woe in their eyes was overwhelming. Sam could see how Rowena’s posture was even more tense, her shoulders set and her eyes flickering to anywhere but his. He briefly wondered what Rowena had seen in her mirror. He didn’t ask.

“Sorry you had to wait,” he said quietly.

He almost expected a sarcastic remark, but all he got was a tired smile. He wanted to reach out, offer her whatever it was she needed right now, but he felt lost as to where to begin, so his hands stayed limply hanging by his side.

Thankfully a familiar snapping sound echoed in the small chamber and cut short the silence that had settled over them.

“You made it to the end! I have to say, I’m a little sad it’s over now. I actually really liked you guys,” Noxi floated through the air and hovered between them. “But you really look like you could use a break from all this.” Her hand moved behind her back and out of thin air she produced a familiar looking dagger.

It floated down to rest in the air between them before it sliced a clear line through the tether. Its glow dimmed, slowly until nothing more than scattered lucent specks danced in the air around them, the tether dissolved along with the dagger.

“I guess this is goodbye. I’m gonna miss you guys,” Noxi sighed.

“Maybe we’ll figure out a way to come visit you sometime,” Sam suggested and smiled at the happy squeal the fairy let out.

He heard Rowena grumble something under her breath, but kept her comments to herself, sending an almost friendly glare towards Noxi.

“I do hope you figure it out; it gets awfully lonely in here, and you two have been lovely company. I will wait for you!” And with that, before either Sam or Rowena could reply, she brought her hand up to her lips, blowing them a kiss. A burst of fairy dust coated their faces, tickling them, and the familiar nauseating feeling emerged for one last ride.

The last thing they heard was Noxi’s giggle floating through the air, and Sam instinctively sought out Rowena’s hand, squeezing it as the world blurred.

Dean had his feet propped up on the table, fingers tapping restlessly against the wood. It was well after midnight now and he was running a little ragged just sitting here doing nothing.

A whooshing sound brought his attention back to the drawn up symbols on the floor which were now glowing again, and suddenly the space within the circle wasn’t empty anymore. 

Sam and Rowena looked worse for wear; their clothes grimy, hair tousled as if they’d been out in a storm for an hour, their faces coated in glitter. “Where the hell did you go?”

He was checking Sam over with practiced eyes, before - to her surprise - moving over and doing the same to Rowena as well. “You both look like shit. What happened? Are you hurt?”

“Aw, don’t tell me I have grown on you?” Rowena quipped.

“Yeah, like mold,” he grumbled, but there was no heat in behind it, and she swore he saw the faintest curl of his lips. “Seriously, you okay?”

Sam nodded. “Nothing life threatening.” Which wasn’t necessarily something good for a normal person, but with everything they’d been through over the years it was probably the best outcome they could’ve hoped for.

Dean breathed out an imperceptible sigh of relief. He gave Sam’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “Get some sleep, man. We’ll figure out what kind of shitstorm you two created tomorrow.” And with that he left, shooting Sam an indecipherable look.

They revealed in the silence for a moment, letting their bodies relax minutely.

“Maybe we should, uh,” he rubbed the back of his neck wearily, “call it a night?” The question was tentative, as if he was gauging where she stood on the matter. He didn’t know how much more emotional whiplash he could handle today.

Rowena gave a tired nod, her usual sharpness dulled by the day’s events. “Aye. Some sleep would do us good, I think. Or maybe a drink. Whichever comes first.”

They exchanged a brief, knowing look - an unspoken agreement that whatever they needed to say would have to wait. Right now, after everything they had been through, rest was all they could handle.

She should have walked away then. She should have bid him goodnight and walked to the nearest bedroom, crash onto the bed and sleep through the next week.

She didn’t move. And neither did he.

Even though the tether was gone, it felt as if they were incapable of moving further away from each other. Sam even leaned in closer and it almost looked like he was leaning in for a kiss, but settled on a hug instead, wrapping his arms around her gently. Her mind flashed back to one mirror in particular.

Sam felt the exact moment Rowena melted into the hug, snaking her own arms around him loosely and he couldn’t help it when he buried his nose in her hair, breathing in her scent. 

Slowly they parted just enough to lean their foreheads together, unspoken words and desires swirling in the air between them.

“Samuel…” she breathed his name. 

For just a moment Rowena wanted to ask. Ask what the mirrors showed him, what he had to give up to get home. Her heart yearned to hear him describe a similar image as she had seen. That his desires aligned with hers. Her mind grounded her in more rational thoughts.

No. It was better not knowing. She could still protect herself as long as she didn’t know.

They were too different for this to work, she knew this as certain as she knew the sun would rise tomorrow. She saw the darkness where he saw the light. He believed in redemption where she only saw punishment. He was steady in the storm, where she was the storm itself. This - they - shouldn’t feel so right. And yet she found herself powerless to stop herself leaning up and pressing a kiss to his cheek, dangerously close to the corner of his mouth. If she just moved another inch she could-

She shut down those thoughts right away. This was the adrenaline, the exhaustion talking. But oh, how she missed this closeness.

He saw her hesitation. Saw how her eyes flickered down to his lips only to be forced away again. Sam wasn’t even sure if he was aware of what he was doing until he was closing the distance between them. He gave her enough time to stop him if she wanted to - the nagging voice in the back of his head telling him he may have read this whole situation wrong - but felt his heart soar when she only closed her eyes and leaned in as well.

She kissed him gently, a chaste kiss that felt like a whispered secret between them. The warmth of his lips brushed against hers, sending ripples of unexpected yearning through his chest. The world around them faded into a soft blur.

She broke the kiss before it could turn into something more, already feeling a building pressure behind her eyes. “Goodnight, Sam,” she whispered. Her hand was featherlight over his cheek, barely touching it. She gave him one last smile before she turned around.

Her fingertips ghosted lightly over her lips as she walked mindlessly down the hall, still tingling from the kiss. If only for a brief time, she had gotten a taste of what could’ve been, and a small, quiet part of her would cherish that as long as she walked this earth.

Sam watched her disappear down the hall. His heart felt heavy with unsaid things. He should’ve told her - he wanted to tell her, to get it out after so much time spent bottling up… whatever these feelings were. But everything had happened so fast and he had no means to slow it down. One minute he had been standing with a rock clenched in his fist, the next he was back at the bunker, and before he knew it she was walking away again, no longer held back by the tether.

His body moved towards his room on autopilot, his thoughts far away and full of her. He wasn’t all too surprised to find himself staring at his own reflection just a minute later. No matter how much he tried he could not shake the image that was now permanently burned into his mind. He hadn’t known he wanted it, until it was presented so clearly to him. And now that he had seen it, he couldn’t unsee it.

He made a quiet promise to himself then, to tell her what he had been too scared to put out there. Today they needed to rest. But tomorrow - tomorrow he’d tell her. She needed to know. He needed her to know.

THIRTY MINUTES EARLIER

The image of him and Dean wrestling in the backyard cracked into a million pieces, the glass now showing nothing more than his own fractured reflection in the scattered pieces on the floor.

Nothing but silence followed. He waited for another beat. Surely he had done something wrong. He should have completed the trial by now.

“Noxi?” he called out tentatively.

“Having a bit of trouble?” her voice came out of nowhere, suddenly appearing beside him. 

Sam crouched down and let his hands hover over the broken glass. “Something’s wrong. I broke it and nothing happened.”

“Are you sure you broke the right mirror?”

The question was painfully loud in his ears. “It’s the right one,” he said a little more forcefully than he meant. It had to be that one. For so long had he yearned for this reality it was hard to believe anything else would be the right choice. “He’s my brother, my family. After everything he’s done for me, everything’s he’s given up-” he cut himself off, frustration edging into his voice. “It’s what I’ve always wanted.”

“The heart can be tricky, you know. It doesn’t always want what the mind thinks it should.”

He swallowed hard, guilt churning in his stomach. How ungrateful must he be if what Dean had fought so hard to give them wasn’t even the thing he wanted most. How could he look him in the eyes, after all the years of risk and heartache, and admit that what he’d been handed on a blood-stained silver platter wasn’t enough? That he’d glimpsed something else, something that made his heart feel steadier and his soul a little more whole.

As if reading his thoughts she gave him a kind smile. “Wanting something for yourself doesn’t mean you’re betraying him. It just means you’re growing, figuring out who you are. You’ve spent so long chasing after what you thought you should want, what you thought would make things right. But maybe what you really want is something you didn’t expect.”

His eyes flickered to the still intact mirror of a quiet, unsuspecting morning. The way Rowena’s red hair caught in the light, making it even more fiercely red than before. How he looked happy. Looked at home.

“Only one way to find out,” she said, and then she was gone.

His fist clenched around the rock as he picked it up. Wanting something for yourself doesn’t mean you’re betraying him. Noxi’s words echoed in his head . Maybe he had grown blind to what his heart had been telling him. The sudden clarity was jolting. Dean above all others would want him to be happy - no matter what that entailed. Of course he would.

He clenched the rock in his fist and walked slowly towards the mirror. It stared back at him tauntingly. Taking a deep breath he shut his eyes tightly and threw it.

The shatter of glass came just a second later.

Cracking open his eyes carefully, his breath hitched. A beautifully carved mahogany door stood proud and tall, beckoning him to come closer. And so he approached with his heart in his throat.

And when the door swung open and he met Rowena’s eyes he exhaled, and it was as though the world itself breathed with him.