Work Text:
"Shut up!" he yelled.
Kimi froze, all his childhood flashing in front of him. Being yelled at brought back memories of when he was younger.
His mother— if one could still call her that—was always violent toward him.
Kimi had always been masculine, a realization that one day led him to understand: he was a boy. Coming out wasn’t his choice; he had been forced into it.
Lorenzo was the first to know. Too young and naïve to grasp the gravity of the situation, Lorenzo had told Kimi’s parents. He didn’t understand what went on behind closed doors in Kimi’s home.
His father, who was never one to raise his voice, changed upon hearing the news that his daughter wanted to be a boy. — Disgusting.
At first, it was just his mother’s violence, and he could bear it.
But when his father started, it was the beginning of the end.
His father’s anger wasn’t just verbal; it became mental and physical.
Kimi still bore the scars on his body.
Years had passed since then, but hearing someone yell brought it all back—the painful memories swirling around him.
He swore he didn’t care.
But deep down, he cared. So much.
As Dino yelled at him for something he didn’t even understand, Kimi’s heart clenched painfully in his chest.
He couldn’t hold it in anymore.
He started crying, tears streaming down his cheeks. He covered his ears, trying to block out the sound—a futile attempt. His breathing turned erratic.
“You’re so fucking useless!” Dino yelled again, and Kimi flinched.
September 13th, 2019.
He remembered that date like it was yesterday. His father had said those exact same words, in the same venomous tone.
His face now was red with tears, his eyes swollen. He felt like absolute garbage.
“Per favore...” Kimi pleaded softly, his voice barely audible as though he didn’t want to startle Dino—or maybe himself. He didn’t know.
Kimi was a mess, and Dino was making it worse.
“You’re nothing more than a damn brat. What can you do? Nothing! Absolutely nothing!” Dino spat. Kimi shrank under the weight of his words, feeling small. So small.
Kimi couldn’t find the words to defend himself. His thoughts were in Italian, but nothing came out of his mouth.
He was afraid.
Before him wasn’t Dino anymore—it was Andrea. Her long, curly hair, her brownish eyes, her feminine curves.
He wanted to throw up at the sight.
He wanted to lash out.
He needed his anchor. He needed Ollie.
Ollie, the only person who had always been gentle with him. Understanding. Caring. Loving.
Ollie was supposed to return in a few minutes, but every second felt like an eternity.
Kimi was stuck in his distress, silently crying out for help.
His knees buckled under the weight of Dino’s words. His hands pressed against his ears, his whole body trembling.
His chest felt heavy, his breathing ragged. His lungs hurt.
For once, he felt alive—but only because of the pain.
He felt like a stray cat on a dark road, running aimlessly, terrified of every sound and every person.
Finally, light broke through the darkness.
Ollie returned to the room and immediately took in the scene.
Kimi was curled up, trembling like a snail trying to retreat into its shell.
Dino stood over him, still shouting.
Without hesitation, Ollie pushed Dino aside and began yelling at him. Kimi couldn’t understand the words, but it didn’t matter.
Ollie was here.
Peace was here.
Ollie knelt beside Kimi, carefully taking one of his hands in his own, trying not to startle him.
He spoke softly, his voice a soothing balm against the chaos.
Kimi’s tear-streaked face bore scars from his past, faint lines now visible from wiping away the tears.
Ollie held his hand, whispering gentle reassurances in Italian.
“Sono qui, tesoro, sono qui.”
—I’m here, darling, I’m here.
Kimi tried to separate this moment from his past, to unplug the flickering television of memories in his mind.
“Resterò al tuo fianco, tesoro.”
—I’ll stay by your side, darling.
“Ma sono un disastro,”
─ But I’m a mess,
Kimi choked out, his breath hitching. He looked at Ollie, his vision blurred with tears.
"Sono un disastro... e tuttavia tu sei qui, a starmi accanto. Perché, Ollie ?”
─ I’m a mess... and yet you’re here, sticking by me. Why, Ollie ?
Ollie cupped Kimi’s wet cheeks in his hands.
The walls Kimi had built around his heart began to crumble.
He swallowed hard, struggling to find his voice amid the storm of emotions.
“Meriti di avere qualcuno al tuo fianco.”
—You deserve to have someone by your side.
What could Kimi do but sob loudly in response?
The TV had finally turned off.
Kimi had found peace.
He had found someone who loved him, someone who would do anything to make him okay.
And perhaps, one day, Dino would meet Cerberus at the gates of hell— just as Kimi had once faced his own demons.
Perhaps Venus, the planet of love, wasn’t destroyed by global warming after all. Perhaps it had been saved.
---
One day, Oliver had said to him:
“The way you scrunch up your nose when you’re trying to remember something, or the way you decide you actually want to tell me about your day—it makes you special to me.”
Kimi had smiled dumbly in response.
“You’re my special, Ollie."