Chapter 1: Pudding Munchers
Chapter Text
# general-madness
Mel-icious ()
Do we have any plans for Christmas?
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whos we
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r u seeing this shit @themachineherald
viktor ()
why did you @ me when you're sitting next to me?
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hey. got u to look didnt i
ManOfProgress ()
@meliciousmeldarda Probs the usual, gonna pop by the graveyard n then eat so many tamales I turn into one myself
ManOfProgress ()
@themachineherald What the hell is your pfp?????? 😭
viktor ()
oh jinx made it. don't like it?
ManOfProgress ()
nnonono I think it really captures your essence
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i do commissions
Mel-icious ()
@manofprogress Do you think Ximera will mind if I pop in at some point on the 25th?
Mel-icious ()
Trying to allocate as much of my time to not being home as possible, lol
ManOfProgress ()
Sheesh, Mommy Medarda causin trouble again?
Mel-icious ()
She decided to book an overnight trip right on the holidays without bothering to tell me. Not like I wanted to spend time with her anyway...
viktor ()
don't see how there wouldn't be room for one more
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I FUCKING KNEW YOURE SPENDING CHRISTMAS TOGETHER
viktor ()
also @manofprogress never use the words 'Mommy Medarda' again about your future mother-in-law, please and thank you jayce
Mel-icious ()
Thanks Viktor. I really appreciate it 💛 (and, agreed)
ManOfProgress ()
Yea ofc!! I think mom's gonna be happy to get to cook for more than one person lmao
Cupcake ()
Spoken like a man who doesn't eat four people's worth of food
ManOfProgress ()
Hey! Im a big guy ok :(
Cupcake ()
Never forget the Great Kiramman Christmas Bash of 2014 when Jayce thought each guest had their own behemoth mountain of pudding so he ate the whole thing before Mum could stop him
ManOfProgress ()
STOP BRINGING THAT UP FFS
Vi stands for Violence ()
LMFAOOOOO WHAT
viktor ()
ah yes i remember this story
Mel-icious ()
WHAT?
ManOfProgress ()
STOP TYPING CAITLYN
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v just snorted so loud the whole lecture hall turned to look at him bye
ManOfProgress ()
PUT THE PHONE DOWN @killshotkiramman
Cupcake ()
Mum banned him from the estate for like two years
ManOfProgress ()
Vi stands for Violence ()
wheezing like a chainsmoker at this interaction
ManOfProgress ()
Well now we know who ISN'T invited to Christmas 🤬
viktor ()
@manofprogress you?
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LMFAOOOO
ManOfProgress ()
I'm leaving the group chat
Mel-icious ()
viktor ()
the fact that i was looking through sad ant gifs when you sent that is proof of something. i don't know what but something.
Cupcake ()
@themachineheraldThat you two should ditch the pudding muncher and become monogamous
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pudding muncher is crazy
Vi stands for Violence ()
pudding muncher sounds like a subtype of lesbian
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happy pride month to my fellow pudding munchers
ManOfProgress ()
WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT PICTURE OF ME???????
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are you forgetting who im sitting next to rn
ManOfProgress ()
WHY DOES VIKTOR HAVE THAT PICTURE OF ME???????
viktor ()
happy pride month
ManOfProgress ()
It's fucking December
ManOfProgress ()
Im crashing out
Vi stands for Violence ()
pride month is every month if you're a fruitcake
Vi stands for Violence ()
fruit pudding
ManOfProgress ()
@themachineherald Could've used a better image is all I'm saying
viktor ()
perhaps, jayce, if you sent anything else than shirtless pics from the forge i could expand my collection
Mel-icious ()
@themachineherald You're still on campus right?
viktor ()
yes, about to finish the lecture
Mel-icious ()
Just turned my AirDrop on. If you see it...
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ain't no fuckin way
viktor ()
watch me accidentally send these to the professor or something
Mel-icious ()
Grade A+ speedrun
ManOfProgress ()
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING?????????
ManOfProgress ()
VIKTOR
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 2: Fatherly Trouble
Notes:
this goes out to all my fellow struggling children not knowing what to get their parents for christmas
Chapter Text
# general-madness
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what 2 get my old repressed father 4 christmas when he keeps sayign "nothin" every time i ask him wat he wants
Vi stands for Violence ()
did i ghostwrite that message tf
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welcome to the club sister
boy savior ()
are all fathers like that???? istg ive been fightin benzo abt this for weeks
Cupcake ()
In my experience, yes
Cupcake ()
Well, Dad's pretty easy. I just check what books he has on his GoodReads wishlist. But Mum...
Vi stands for Violence ()
the surprising benefits of having only one parent
boy savior ()
word
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word
boy savior ()
lol jinx
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thats me!
Vi stands for Violence ()
no but actually why are they always like "oh i need nothing having you around is enough hohohoho" BITCH?? HAVING US AROUND IS NOT A GIFT IT IS A CURSE
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im pretty sure the only thing silco would want is a pack of cigarettes
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merry fucking christmas old man here's lung cancer
Vi stands for Violence ()
get him a vape
boy savior ()
the image of silco vaping at his big ass age is equally horrifying and amusing
boy savior ()
you smell the intoxicating aroma of pink lemonade, thinking that you'll get a refreshing beverage from a lemonade stand on a hot summer's day. you turn the corner. it's the personification of a raisin hunched over his neon purple vape. what do u do
Cupcake ()
Run away screaming
Vi stands for Violence ()
fist fight him for a puff
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give him a nicotine chewing gum
boy savior ()
three types of people
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i think he might be getting to the age where ppl start unironically doing jigsaw puzzles and going to bingo nights
viktor ()
jayce & i do jigsaw puzzles...
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@themachineherald u changed ur pfp wtf :(
viktor ()
srry ran out of nitro and couldn't bring myself to run around with that
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and THAT is what you settled for instead??
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is there a single picture of you that
1. has u smiling
2. doesnt make u look constipated
3. isnt a creepshot jayce took
viktor ()
nothing to smile about in my life
boy savior ()
Cupcake ()
I think it's a good picture of you!
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watch out @viforviolet your girlfriends gonna leave you for a gay guy
Vi stands for Violence ()
gay???
boy savior ()
🤨🏳️🌈? @themachineherald
viktor ()
please don't tell i've been giving off straight vibes this whole time
Vi stands for Violence ()
ofc u havent i just? ur dating mel???
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greedy ass gay man stealing from the lesbians
boy savior ()
"ofc u havent" LMFAO
viktor ()
mel and i are more like business partners
working together for the same goal
viktor ()
besides, @getjinxedloser, she's polyamorous. i haven't rendered her unavailable.
Cupcake ()
I get it. It's like when you go to a really fancy restaurant and order something you're not usually a fan of but because the quality is so high you're willing to give it a go.
viktor ()
that doesn't make any sense
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LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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@themachineherald
Cupcake ()
Anyway.
@viforviolet We could go do some shopping together? Share ideas?
boy savior ()
me changing the subject when i lose an argument
Cupcake ()
We weren't arguing and I didn't even change the subject!
Vi stands for Violence ()
sounds good dude
*babe
Cupcake ()
Dude?
boy savior ()
bro just called her girlfriend dude
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gotta be the auto-bro-rrect messin with her
sorry that was weak
Vi stands for Violence ()
I WAS TEXTING JAUYCE IN A DIFFERRENT TAB
ManOfProgress ()
Hey guys why did Vi just call me babe
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 3: Enemies to... Enemies who kiss?
Notes:
slight content warning for some insensitive/ableist jokes, though i'd say viktor is allowed to make them lmao
salo's catching strays cus i kept thinking abt him and viktor today, i like to think they have some petty academic beef + salo always looked down on viktor in the academy's student council before his accident and subsequent paralysis...
ALSO since he doesn't have a canon first name i was thinking about it and realized that his surname is literally finnish. my motherland! so now he's finnish to me through and through; still kinda gave him a universal first name but.. he finnish to me
Chapter Text
# general-madness
Mel-icious ()
How do I convince a friend to ditch their horrid situationship?
ManOfProgress ()
THE NEW PROFILE PIC!!!
(sorry please continue)
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@meliciousmeldarda i ask myself that question every day
Vi stands for Violence ()
frame the other party for murder or domestic terrorism or smth
Mel-icious ()
Tempting in all honesty…
I just don't understand how she keeps seeing any good in him.
ManOfProgress ()
Dare I ask who this is about?
Mel-icious ()
Lest and Salo 😵💫
viktor ()
eugh
ManOfProgress ()
It's gotta be a pity thing
viktor ()
well he is pathetic alright
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i cant believe youre still beefing with that fucking guy
viktor ()
am not
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are
i saw that stinkeye you gave him yesterday
Mel-icious ()
He's using her kindness against her. I know his situation sucks but it doesn't give him the right to treat her like he does! Or treat anyone the way he does for that matter.
Vi stands for Violence ()
oh if its that twink in a wheelchair ur talking abt then you could definitely just murder him
ManOfProgress ()
Twink? Isn't he into women?
Vi stands for Violence ()
@manofprogress"too" or "exclusively"?
ManOfProgress ()
How am I supposed to know!?
Vi stands for Violence ()
women of the world i am so sorry
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oh hes definitely a queer, ive seen how he limps that wrist of his
Vi stands for Violence ()
"a queer" is crazy
viktor ()
@getjinxedloser yes, in my experience limp = gay
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HAH
nice one v
Vi stands for Violence ()
twink is a state of mind
viktor ()
my culture is not your costume @viforviolet
Vi stands for Violence ()
ASHSAHDSHAJD
piss off dude lmfao
Mel-icious ()
Anyway... It's just frustrating. 😖😖
viktor ()
karma came for him once, who is to say it won't again?
ManOfProgress ()
@themachineherald Karma wouldn't happen to be a guy with a walking stick would it?
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i'd genuinely pay money to see salo and v fist fight
viktor ()
i wouldn't need to punch. i'd just walk down a flight of stairs.
Vi stands for Violence ()
HELO
ManOfProgress ()
Viktor...
viktor ()
what's he gonna do? run after me?
Mel-icious ()
I always forget how diabolical you can be, Viktor.
viktor ()
i'm honored
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fighting the urge to print out these chatlogs and shove them under salo's door to see if he'd actually try to do somethin
viktor ()
i honestly would not stop you
ManOfProgress ()
This got sidetracked so damn badly.
@meliciousmeldarda If I were you I'd list out all the crappy things he's done and make her try to defend them. Sometimes it can be hard to grasp unless it's all laid out at once?
viktor ()
@meliciousmeldarda if i were you i'd roll him into oncoming traffic
but if you insist on being the bigger person
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all this talk about what you wanna do to him, whats next? u wanna kiss him too?
fix his inevitable erectile dysfunction?
Vi stands for Violence ()
@themachineherald @tobiassalo
WHAT THE FCUJ
WHY DID THAT PING
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wh
Vi stands for Violence ()
i typed viktor @ salo wtf
HES HERE??????
ManOfProgress ()
I... guess we never removed the old inactive members.........
viktor ()
@getjinxedloser i'm going to curse your entire bloodline
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WDYM I WASNT THE ONE WHO PINNED
viktor ()
it includes violet
Vi stands for Violence ()
i'm so sorry bro i
holy shit hes typing
Tobias Salo ()
Message me again and I'll see you in court.
And Medarda: stay the fuck out of my business.
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viktor rn probably
Tobias Salo left. ()
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 4: A Wild Start to the morning
Notes:
slight content warning for discussion of fecal matter, not in detail but u know... some ppl are grossed out by that lmao, me on the other hand loves poopy humor
fun fact: this mishap actually happened to me a while ago... english is hard.........
Chapter Text
# general-madness
ManOfProgress ()
I have not defecated in the last 72 hrs and it's starting to get worrying
viktor ()
thank you for the news flash captain constipation
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BYEEEEEEE
boy savior ()
i did not have to read allat with my own two god-given eyeballs
ManOfProgress ()
I was not expecting half of you to be awake at this hour...
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u gotta go visit dr. dookie
ManOfProgress ()
I'M WORRIED ABOUT MY HEALTH AND Y'ALL DECIDE TO CYBERBULLY ME ABOUT IT
Too early for this!
boy savior ()
ITS ALSO TOO EARLY TO HEAR ABOUT SOME DUDES SHIT SHENANIGANS TF
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the crap chronicles
boy savior ()
bowel business
Mel-icious ()
Do you want me to ask Lest about it? Meeting up for a coffee today.
ManOfProgress ()
Can you maybe phrase it as a rhetorical question 😓
Vi stands for Violence ()
no shes gonna go in guns blazing yelling about jayce talis hole
viktor ()
eh, it's about time for a rumor. been too peaceful for too long
boy savior ()
this reminds me of that one post where instead of googling her son's bowel issues the mom accidentally posted it as a fb status and the whole neighborhood started @ing the dude being like "lol saw ur mom's post hope ur diarrhea is going well"
ManOfProgress ()
That sounds like something my mom would do, ngl…
Mel-icious ()
@manofprogress Got it, king.
viktor ()
konstipation king
ManOfProgress ()
ENOUGH
What're you gonna be up to today?
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pooping
you must be jealous
viktor ()
@manofprogress you should eat and drink nothing but chewing gum and coffee for the next two days
ManOfPoopless ()
Why?
ManOfPoopless ()
WHO THE HELL CHANGED MY NAME?????????????????????????????????
Vi stands for Violence ()
❤️
viktor ()
@manofprogress because they make you lactate, fun fact
Vi stands for Violence ()
HUUHHHH
ManOfPoopless ()
THEY WHAT
boy savior ()
I LEAVE FOR FOUR MINUTES
viktor ()
you know
they're a lactative
they make you poop
ManOfPoopless ()
VIKTOR
THATS LAXATIVES
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ur joking right
viktor ()
wait
ManOfPoopless ()
LACTATING IS TITTY MILK
Mel-icious ()
What did I just stumble in on…?
viktor ()
oh
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v PLEASE tell me youre joking
viktor ()
i see my error now
Vi stands for Violence ()
im gonan start CRYIGN
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this just in viktor wants jayce lactating everywhere
ManOfPoopless ()
SHUT UP JINX
viktor ()
Mel-icious ()
Oh...
Vi stands for Violence ()
@getjinxedloser who doesnt?? ;)))))))
amirite @themachineherald @meliciousmeldarda
ManOfPoopless ()
I feel violated
Mel-icious ()
I think I have to go lay down.
viktor ()
kurvadrát do prdele vysrat KURVA
boy savior ()
oh hell naw the eastern european jumped out
viktor ()
shit ass language doesn't even make sense too many similar words
ManOfPoopless ()
BREATHE V
Mel-icious ()
Happens to the best of us... I guess
Vi stands for Violence ()
me when i lie
ManOfPoopless ()
@viforviolet You JUST called me babe a few days ago you have no room to talk
Vi stands for Violence ()
that is NOT comparable
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@manofprogress you heard the man start chewing that gum
boy savior ()
if any of us could produce milk it would definitely be @manofprogress
ManOfPoopless ()
WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN
viktor ()
means: boobs huge
Vi stands for Violence ()
viktor got so mad he devolved into a caveman
ooga booga. boobs huge. milk boob
Mel-icious ()
@ispeakforthetrees "if any of us could" You said that like half of us aren't female 😭
boy savior ()
well im sorry miss ma'am i didnt want to assume
Vi stands for Violence ()
it's not even 9am and we've already discussed
1. poop
2. titty milk
3. jayce's big naturals
godspeed to this server
viktor ()
@manofprogress my point still stands, if you want to poop eat gum (and cough drops) and drink coffee
they are
Laxatives
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was so scared to say the word you gave it its own message
viktor ()
this is what i get for trying to be helpful
next time i'll just let the constipation consume him
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 5: Suspicious Shenanigans
Notes:
the salo shenanigans continue, and give me a chance to reveal a little bit more about the academy!
for the student council, i imagine mel is the council president and jayce is her vice. salo's been wanting the title ever since the current council has been active (so like 4 years) and always runs and subsequently loses against mel lol. viktor's the secretary and the person who records the meeting minutes, but isn't actually a part of the council body itself.
Chapter Text
# general-madness
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this is jinx reporting live from the piltover academy cafeteria
this just in: viktor and salo are having a conversation
boy savior ()
and are they at each other's throats in the argumentative way or the gay way
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just talkin for now
will keep u updated if someone gets stabbed or kissed
boy savior ()
GET JINXED ()
exactly!
ManOfProgress ()
Oh Jinx!!! Is Viktor at the cafeteria?
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is that not what i just said
ManOfProgress ()
Well idk it'd been 2 mins so…. You move fast
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nah dude i have my reportative duties
whaddya want
ManOfProgress ()
What… uhh what are they doing
boy savior ()
jayce heard viktor might be kissing guys and galloped over
ManOfProgress ()
🫤
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theyre talking but im too far away to hear
it doesnt look like theres gonna be a fight tho
sadge
ManOfProgress ()
Well that's a relief
If you go hit him up tell him I said hi
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should i kiss him for you too
ManOfProgress ()
NO!!!!
boy savior ()
NO
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LMFAOOOOOOOOO
wait shit theyre moving
brb
Cupcake ()
Hello my freaky family unit
ManOfProgress ()
Hey Sprout!!
Where're you been
Cupcake ()
Finishing an assigment
Professor Hoskel is relentless
boy savior ()
ew i hate that fucking guy
Cupcake ()
So happy to see eye to eye on something with you, Ekko
ManOfProgress ()
Yeah he's… really confident in his abilities despite never showcasing any of them
boy savior ()
thats a nice way of saying the mans a fraud
Cupcake ()
He expects the utmost respect and work ethic and then goes around acting like a whole fool
And seems to forget that we have other courses, too
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update
they have entered a lecture hall
uncertain if its just their next class or… a place of privacy
ManOfProgress ()
Well if it's the latter then you're ruining it spectacularly
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aww shucks
am currently balancing on an AC unit by a window to see if things get frisky
Cupcake ()
I'm not even going to ask
boy savior ()
fuck yeah
ManOfProgress ()
The suspense is killing me
This isn't me
Why are my insides itchy
Cupcake ()
HUH?
ManOfProgress ()
YOU KNOW
Like when you're itching to do something
boy savior ()
yeah so nobody in the history of the world has ever referred to that as "their insides being itchy"
ManOfProgress ()
I'm a bit of a trailblazer sometimes
Cupcake ()
That's a nice way to put it
ManOfProgress ()
@getjinxedloser Any news?
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dude will you keep it in your pants for 5 minutes
ManOfProgress ()
Just pretend you're livetweeting a KPOP concert or smth please
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fine god
theyre just standing there!
boy savior ()
MENACINGLY
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i think theyre discussin smth about the room cus viktor keeps doing that thing where he flings his cane around to point at shit
lots of pointing at the staircase leadin to the front row
oh
oh i think the stair lift is broken
ManOfProgress ()
Oh?
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OH DEFINITELY BROKEN THEY TRIED TO ATTACH SALOS CHAIR INTO IT AND THE WHOLE THING CAME OFF THE WALL
he looks so goofy when hes fuming
Cupcake ()
That actually sounds really horrible
There's always been inaccessibility problems at the campus...
ManOfProgress ()
Viktor was PISSED at the lack of elevators in his first year
I mean he still is but now it's just quiet irritation
boy savior ()
guess it only matters when one of the rich tuition-paying posh pricks has it become an inconvenience
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this is fucking painful to watch
ManOfProgress ()
What's going on?
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and by painful i mean salos spine
v's helpin him down the stairs
how they plan on getting back up i dont know
Cupcake ()
Could be a way to make a stance.
boy savior ()
could be viktor's masterplan to leave him there to starve
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LMFAOO
no i think that hes genuinely being helpful
ManOfProgress ()
I'm not sure how to feel about that
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FUCK
OH SHIT OH FUCK
boy savior ()
???????? @getjinxedloser
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SAW ME
THEY
ManOfProgress ()
Thanks for the wisdom, Yoda
viktor ()
@getjinxedloser what the fuck are you doing?
ManOfProgress ()
Omg hi
viktor ()
have you been talking about me??
ManOfProgress ()
No
boy savior ()
yes
viktor ()
what the fuck, jinx
you could've just come in and asked what we were up to
STOP RUNNING AWAY @getjinxedloser
ManOfProgress ()
Sooooooo
What were you guys up to
viktor ()
jayce.
ManOfProgress ()
IM JUST CURIOUS
Did you make up after that fiasco from Tuesday??
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maed pu % made iout
Cupcake ()
What?
boy savior ()
made up and made out
Cupcake ()
How did you parse that??
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@ispeakforthetrees yes ty
was runnign
ManOfProgress ()
What were u doing? @themachineherald
viktor ()
private business
boy savior ()
more like private part business tf
ManOfProgress ()
EKKO
viktor ()
ManOfProgress ()
VIKTOR
viktor ()
if you INSIST
he told me he wants to put forward a proposition in the next student council meeting to overhaul the accessibility guidelines of the academy
to install more elevators, fix the old shitty chair lifts, build ramps in and out of every building and lecture hall
he actually had some pretty decent ideas
Cupcake ()
I'm surprised you agreed after all the bullshit Salo's tossed at you over the years
viktor ()
this isn't about him
i needed those accommodations when i got in. he needs them now. students will need them long after we're both gone.
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YOU WERE PLANNING ON GAVING HIM GET HIT BY A CAR TWO DAYS AGO
ManOfProgress ()
Viktor...
That's really admirable
viktor ()
what is?
ManOfProgress ()
How you're willing to put your animosity aside for the greater good!
viktor ()
woah woah woah
you misunderstand jayce
i still hate his guts
boy savior ()
lmfaooo
ManOfProgress ()
You'll still back him on the proposition then?
viktor ()
yeah
ManOfProgress ()
Shit, V
I'm proud of you :')
Cupcake ()
This is going to do a lot of good
ManOfProgress ()
Right? And I know Mel's gonna be behind you two too. And me ofc.
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the world's bitchiest polycule
ManOfProgress ()
HE IS NOT A PART OF THE POLYCULE JINX
viktor ()
meeting's on monday
i'm gonna ask him if we can fake some accident on the academy grounds to make our point more valid
boy savior ()
oh i love fraud
ManOfProgress ()
Viktor I really highly doubt he'll agree to anything you have in mind
viktor ()
but the stairs are so deliciously slippery this time of year :/
viktor ()
oh and @manofprogress?
ManOfProgress ()
Yes Viktor?
viktor ()
can you come lift salo out of the pit?
ManOfProgress ()
WHAT
viktor ()
yeah he's proper stuck here unless we get a forklift
or you
ManOfProgress ()
I can't fucking believe I'm doing this
Give me five
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 6: The Autism Diagnosis Appointment
Notes:
you'll notice in this chapter i've used the dateline feature from discord to indicate the passing of time; obviously not something that would happen on discord unless the day changes but handy for timeskip purposes!
surprisingly a much heavier chapter than i anticipated to ever making for this fic! audhd jayce is so near and dear to my heart it felt like a disservice to not include him but i also didn't want this to be all jokes and fuun at his expense because it can be a very difficult thing for a person to deal with :")
also! a little hard to see but jayce is wearing a knee brace in the latter image of him! he had some kind of accident in his 20s that left him with chronic leg problems and while he doesn't have to wear it all the time sometimes on bad pain days he uses it for support :)
Chapter Text
# general-madness
viktor ()
GET JINXED ()
WAHUH
viktor ()
i wish i was joking
Vi stands for Violence ()
BYE I DIDNT EVEN DRESS UP THAT HARD FOR MY OWN GRADUATION
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blurry ass pic
viktor ()
shut up i forgot my glasses
Mel-icious ()
Oh so That's what he was looking so professional for
@themachineherald Tell him he looks very handsome for me 🥰
viktor ()
will do
maybe it'll calm his nerves
Mel-icious ()
Aw, is he nervous?
viktor ()
appointment's in 15 mins and he's pacing the waiting room
Mel-icious ()
Wish I'd had the chance to come too...
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the fuck's he nervous for its not like the autism will kill him
boy savior ()
actin like its a terminal illness
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whatcha doing awake @ispeakforthetrees
boy savior ()
8am lecture
actually illegal
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ew wtf
boy savior ()
at least i got my mans scar keepin me company
viktor ()
ok he's in now
and to answer your question, @getjinxedloser, i also don't know what the big deal is
Vi stands for Violence ()
well jayce has a tendency to overthink
remember when he realized he was bi? lmfao
viktor ()
as fun as it was being his sexual awakening, it was painful to watch
Mel-icious ()
Maybe he thinks his mother or other figures of authority in his life will see him differently after?
boy savior ()
THE MAN IS THIRTY YEARS OLD, WHAT AUTHORITY
GET JINXED ()
he's a mama's boy ekko
viktor ()
he already did this song and dance with adhd, but i guess autism is more stigmatized in society
boy savior ()
we rlly do be livin in a society
Mel-icious ()
I'm pretty sure he knows it's irrational but can't change his way of thinking 😮💨
GET JINXED ()
call him alcoholics anonymous the way hes AA
(autistic and anxious)
Vi stands for Violence ()
hes not autistic yet
boy savior ()
just cus he doesnt have a diagnosis doesnt mean he doesnt have it bye
viktor ()
i remember when i was 22 and got infected with the neurodivergency virus out of nowhere
only a few years after the transgenderfluenza
GET JINXED ()
yeah it was a sad day in my family when i got diagnosed with the nonbinary
Vi stands for Violence ()
you joke but i vividly remember silco blowing a casket
GET JINXED ()
fake news
boy savior ()
god forbid i ever defend silco but he stopped deadnaming jinx way earlier than you did @viforviolet
viktor ()
@viforviolet
Vi stands for Violence ()
STOP
GET JINXED ()
the fact you had that image on speed dial
boy savior ()
imma steal that
One hour later
viktor ()
@everyone
GET JINXED ()
passed with flying colors?
viktor ()
@getjinxedloser naturally
Vi stands for Violence ()
LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOO
Cupcake ()
Wow, I'm so shocked
GET JINXED ()
loving that u probably knew for like 15 mins but had to take the time to edit that pic
ManOfProgress ()
WHAT THE HELL V
I go to the bathroom for one minute and you're immediately being a bastard
Why did you @ everyone 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
viktor ()
important news
boy savior ()
and the crowd is unsurprised
but also happy for you!
ManOfProgress ()
Was it really that obvious........................
Mel-icious ()
Baby I love you but your obliviousness is staggering
ManOfProgress ()
...........
What gave it away?
Cupcake ()
Do you really want an answer to that question?
boy savior ()
@manofprogress game recognizes game ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
viktor ()
mel sent me this when she first met jayce
ManOfProgress ()
NO SHE DIDN'T
Mel-icious ()
No you're right I didn't
ManOfProgress ()
THANK YOU
Mel-icious ()
I sent this
Vi stands for Violence ()
WHAJKHKJSAD
Mel-icious ()
You remember that Minecraft world you played at least 100 hours on in a week long period and didn't sleep or eat but that's now been rotting on your PC for months?
You remember that, Jayce?
ManOfProgress ()
I..... got busy
GET JINXED ()
the ol' hyperfixation cycle
Cupcake ()
Ok guys jokes aside
Give Jayce some breathing room
viktor ()
is this one of those "only i am allowed to make fun of my brother" moments?
Cupcake ()
Yes
ManOfProgress ()
Wow... Thanks...
Mel-icious ()
I'm sorry Love 🤍
How do you feel?
ManOfProgress ()
That's a loaded question
ManOfProgress ()
I guess... relieved? I don't really know how to describe it...
I read your messages while I waited for the psychiatrist to do her thing and also thought about what she told me and it really made me kinda emotional in a weird way
What you said is right, Mel, I was scared to disappoint my mom or... someone? Idk??
And cus like. My mom means well she really does but she's like the CEO of the whole belief that if you can sit still for ten minutes or listen to instructions you don't have ADHD and if you can hold a conversation or deduct social cues you can't be autistic
I've talked to her about this so many times and every time it's just been dismissal after dismissal and it made me even second guess myself
Cupcake ()
Jayce...
ManOfProgress ()
At the end of the day I think I was just mostly scared to admit it, to myself
All the stuff I've heard my whole life about how autistic people don't have empathy or don't know how to socialize or are fucking annoying to deal with
I didn't want to be that...
viktor ()
jayce are you crying in the bathroom
ManOfProgress ()
No
...Maybe
Mel-icious ()
Oh honey ☹️
Vi stands for Violence ()
shit dude i'm so sorry
Mel-icious ()
Are you OK? Safe? Do you need anything?
ManOfProgress ()
I let V inside it's ok
Need a sec
And a hug
Mel-icious ()
Of course 🫂
Cupcake ()
🫂🫂
I sent two because Vi is here
GET JINXED ()
thats a hug?? this whole time ive seen it as one of those old cinema tape players
viktor ()
oh for god's sake jayce just snorted all over my shirt
ManOfProgress ()
Ok Im calm now
Thank you
And thank you for being so open about your own diagnoses because I don't think I would've done this otherwise
It made me feel less ashamed about it 🥲
GET JINXED ()
hey jayceyboy
ManOfProgress ()
Yes? (said in a worried tone)
GET JINXED ()
can we still use that DIAGNOSED pic to bully you
ManOfProgress ()
Only on the condition that everyone else here also has one edited of them with fitting phrases
Vi stands for Violence ()
yeah you can make one of me from last year with that pic i sent you sobbing and crying over cait and put SITUATIONSHIP OVER on it
ManOfProgress ()
My (wo)man 👊🏽
Vi stands for Violence ()
👊🏻
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 7: New Friends and Hookahs
Notes:
this chapter is honestly just a whole load of nothing but i'm hoping to scribble something up for new years so this is setting that other potential fic up LMFAO. no promises tho
also, updates will slow down for christmas-time! thanks for all the love you've been giving this silly little project
Chapter Text
# general-madness
Mel-icious ()
So, how many people should I be expecting for the New Year's party?
I'm assuming some of you are bringing stragglers.
GET JINXED ()
you assume correctly
boy savior ()
yeah jinx n i are probably dragging claggor and mylo by at least for a bit
those two need some enrichment time outside of their enclosure
oh n i'll ask scar but he might be busy w his bebe
GET JINXED ()
n then mylos prolly gonna wanna bring that new lil girlfriend of his
Vi stands for Violence ()
dude they're not dating!
boy savior ()
does mylo know that????????
Vi stands for Violence ()
GERT IS A LESBIAN
boy savior ()
DOES MYLO KNOW THAT??????????????????
Mel-icious ()
Alright, that's four potential visitors. Others?
Vi stands for Violence ()
uhhhhh
GET JINXED ()
hold on guys shes tryin to form a thought
Vi stands for Violence ()
SHUT UP
@meliciousmeldarda i'm probably gonna drag my guy loris in just to act as an alcohol buffer if we end up goin bar-hopping after
ManOfProgress ()
Who on Earth is Loris??
Vi stands for Violence ()
u know
big guy
kinda looks like my dad
ManOfProgress ()
I don't know what your dad looks like!!
GET JINXED ()
vander i hardly know er
Vi stands for Violence ()
he graduated as a machinist last spring
ManOfProgress ()
OHHHH I remember now!
I had a couple courses with him in welding
GET JINXED ()
yay, mr. protein-for-brains got there in the end
Cupcake ()
I think it could be fun to invite Steb
Vi stands for Violence ()
BUT THEN MADDIES GONNA FUCKING DRAG ALONG??
Cupcake ()
You cannot let Maddie dominate your decisions forever, Vi!
boy savior ()
dominate is such a choice of words in this context
GET JINXED ()
oh please please please let maddie come i wanna see the condo blow up
ManOfProgress ()
Oh jeez
Cupcake ()
She doesn't even hang out with Steb anymore. He ditched her ass when she fucked us all over.
GET JINXED ()
the possibility of maddie showing up wherever you go is low... but never zero
Vi stands for Violence ()
FINE
but if she dares show her carrot lookin ass in your vicinity im beating the shit outta her
Mel-icious ()
If you do... Please do it outside.
And also record it.
boy savior ()
damnnnnn miss medarda comin in with the punches
Mel-icious ()
@manofprogress What about you?
ManOfProgress ()
Oh I think I'll pass on beating up a random woman
Mel-icious ()
NOT THAT! The party!
ManOfProgress ()
OH
Vi stands for Violence ()
how dare you not swing with me jayce i thought you were my ride or die
Cupcake ()
That doesn't mean what you think it means...
ManOfProgress ()
Uhh I don't think I really have anyone to invite unless you want Heimerdinger at the party
boy savior ()
hey, live music
GET JINXED ()
hes gonna wipe the floor with all of us with that lil ukulele of his
viktor ()
@meliciousmeldarda how do you feel about questionably legal narcotics at said party?
Vi stands for Violence ()
vik asking the real questions iktr
Mel-icious ()
Wasn't weed legalized in Piltover like five years ago?
viktor ()
i just want to know if you'd confiscate a hookah if one were to show up in someone's bag
GET JINXED ()
WOAHHHH
ManOfProgress ()
SINCE WHEN HAVE YOU HAD A WHOLE ASS HOOKAH??????????
viktor ()
i'm building one rn
boy savior ()
you're insane /pos
Mel-icious ()
Oh my god?
Hold on I need to think
ManOfProgress ()
viktor ()
take your time
Vi stands for Violence ()
@themachineherald where on campus are you hiding this hookah operation
viktor ()
...
my closet
boy savior ()
my guy went back to the closet to fulfill his goal, admirable
ManOfProgress ()
@themachineherald YOUR CLOSET?? VIKTOR WE SHARE A CLOSET
viktor ()
oh i'm sorry
the hookah is in jayce's closet
GET JINXED ()
if viktor can bring a hookah can i bring isha
ManOfProgress ()
Is that another drug??
GET JINXED ()
NO ITS MY BABY SISTER TF
Cupcake ()
"Is that another drug?" 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
ManOfProgress ()
Shut up
Wait
You have another sister?????
GET JINXED ()
yeah and shes about the size of a hookah so i figured
Mel-icious ()
@themachineherald Would you be willing to compromise the hookah for a bong?
viktor ()
that's fine
Vi stands for Violence ()
bro took a whole minute to type that reply
GET JINXED ()
me when its not fine
boy savior ()
how viktor felt typing that
viktor ()
It's Fine
it probably wouldn't have even been smoking ready by new year's
Mel-icious ()
Sorry, I just can't risk getting caught with one in my house lol
ManOfProgress ()
Thank god
I was getting nervous
Mel-icious ()
Anyways. I have seven names on that stragglers list, does anybody have any more?
Eight if I can get some clarity on this Isha person?
GET JINXED ()
shes the swaggiest six year old youll ever meet
Mel-icious ()
I... think the age limit is going to be 18, I'm afraid.
boy savior ()
damn 😔
lil sha... youll be missed
ManOfProgress ()
Are Lest and Elora coming?
Mel-icious ()
Hold on, I'll just send the list...
viktor ()
i'll ask sky but i know she'll say no so don't even bother adding her to the list
Mel-icious ()
— New Year’s Party 🎆
Me → Lest (alone!), Elora, ask Shoola?
J&V 💗
Vi & Caitlyn → Loris, Steb
Jinx & Ekko → Claggor, Mylo & Gert, Scar?
ManOfProgress ()
Goodbye why are me and V the only ones who don't have any friends outside of this circle
viktor ()
at least we got a heart...
GET JINXED ()
i like the (alone!)
Mel-icious ()
I may or may not have panicked when the council was talking about NYE plans and told Salo my building doesn't have an elevator so he won't even consider inviting himself
Vi stands for Violence ()
brutal
[Message #general-madness]
Chapter 8: Tortilla Talk
Notes:
hope everybody had a great christmas (or if you don't celebrate just a splendid last week)!! this chapter is so dumb and based on a convo that happened between me and my friends today lmfao
Chapter Text
# general-madness
Cupcake ()
What should we buy from the grocery store for tomorrow? Whats the menu plan?
Mel-icious ()
I just emptied most of my pantries for Christmas so it's looking pretty depressing here...
I'm open for suggestions!
GET JINXED ()
is your wallet open too miss medarda
boy savior ()
i'll prolly order smth in
does ubereats deliver on nye??
Mel-icious ()
Yes, Jinx
And yes, Ekko (I think)
GET JINXED ()
@killshotkiramman get me those fuckin expensive ass truffles vi brought back from ur fancy pancy christmas party
and pepsi
max
big bottle
2 liter
Cupcake ()
Say please
GET JINXED ()
please
get off my huge dick
Cupcake ()
🫥
Vi stands for Violence ()
i come bearing bad news
i dont think this place sells those
GET JINXED ()
what if this was my final straw
boy savior ()
then i would bury you in a pepsi can shaped coffin
GET JINXED ()
my hero!
Vi stands for Violence ()
@meliciousmeldarda how r we on the alcohol front?
Mel-icious ()
I tasked the boys with that
@manofprogress @themachineherald You go to the store yet?
viktor ()
going tomorrow
any requests for beverages shall be forwarded to my electronic mailbox
GET JINXED ()
whys bro texting like jigsaw
ManOfProgress ()
Oooh could we make tortillas or something??
I always get a craving for those when I drink
Vi stands for Violence ()
the only thing i crave when drunk is violence
ManOfProgress ()
I know dude
Praise the lord for Loris coming by
Cupcake ()
Ok, so we making tortillas?
boy savior ()
everyone in favor of the torts say aye
ManOfProgress ()
AYE!
boy savior ()
@manofprogress you dont count goofy
ManOfProgress ()
GET JINXED ()
aye aye cap'n
Vi stands for Violence ()
aye
viktor ()
whaye not
ManOfProgress ()
Pfft
Mel-icious ()
Sounds good!
Elora says aye, too
Cupcake ()
👌
Vi stands for Violence ()
what r we putting on
is this a formal affair
boy savior ()
excellent question
my ass is not wearing a suit
Mel-icious ()
Nooo we're keeping it casual
Whatever you're the most comfortable in
ManOfProgress ()
@viforviolet I'm thinkin like salsa, salad, tomato, cucumber, guac, dip, onion and some meat!
Wait
Oh
Vi stands for Violence ()
NOT ON THE FUCKING TORTILLA
ManOfProgress ()
SHUT UP I didnt see the other m
GET JINXED ()
LMFAOOOOOO
Cupcake ()
Jesus Christ please get a grip @manofprogress
Mel-icious ()
😭😭
viktor ()
thanks for the shopping list, i guess
ManOfProgress ()
CAIT WOULD'VE ASKED FOR IT ANYWAY
I was being proactive
boy savior ()
good save man
Cupcake ()
Well, is there anything to ADD to that list?
GET JINXED ()
dude already listed half of the store
ManOfProgress ()
I'm passionate about this topic
Mel-icious ()
Bit of a weird request but I'd love some tuna in mine 😮💨
Vi stands for Violence ()
tuna has been deposited into the basket
viktor ()
i know jayce will want a salsa spicy enough to send most people to the ER so can you grab a mild dip to go with that
boy savior ()
average european man spice tolerance
ManOfProgress ()
The amount of milk V drinks whenever he eats Ma's cooking is worrying
viktor ()
@ispeakforthetrees you joke but that's accurate
i'm so lame that i only put salad meat dip and cucumber on mine
maybe even a paprika if i'm feeling extra crazy
GET JINXED ()
Vi stands for Violence ()
1 paprika
viktor ()
just the whole thing
no cutting no nothing
Vi stands for Violence ()
oh right
see i forgot that paprika was not always a powder
i was like
a paprika.... cutting...???
boy savior ()
post this image to confuse vi
viktor ()
sorry for confusing you with my euro-centric vernacular
[Message #general-madness]
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