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“This is the best choice for Bella. You know it, Charlie—she needs her mother.” Little Bella sat quietly on the stairs, listening to her parents argue in the kitchen. She wasn’t supposed to be eavesdropping, but their voices were so loud that it was impossible not to hear.
Bella hears her father’s coarse voice rumble through the house. “She needs her father just as much, Renee.”
They’ve been arguing for hours. Bella just wants them to stop.
She’s noticed her mother has been gone more often lately and how restless she’s become. Then there are the random questions—whether Bella likes living in Forks or if she’d mind moving somewhere else, somewhere with her mom. Bella couldn’t help but notice her dad was never mentioned in those questions.
“Stop! You always do this, Renee. You never think about anyone but yourself! This affects our little girl the most, and you just want to leave—take away her stability, our stability. You never think!” Bella had never heard her father yell before. She doesn’t like the sound of it.
“I’ve thought plenty, Charlie! I’m sick of this place. I’m sick of the ‘How are you, Renee? What’s new?’ Nothing. Nothing is ever new, Charlie! This place doesn’t change. I need something different. Bella needs something different.”
Bella doesn’t want anything different. She just wants her mom and dad.
They don’t listen. She holds onto her teddy bear even tighter.
--
Renee leaves a week later. She doesn’t bother asking Bella if she wants to go with her. There’s no heartfelt goodbye or explanation—just a sticky note on the counter saying she’ll call when she gets the chance.
Her dad pulls Bella into a tight hug, giving her a soft, reassuring smile. He tells her none of this is her fault and promises he’ll always be there for her. It’s just the two of them now, against the world.
But Bella can’t shake the feeling that it is her fault. Every argument between Renee and her dad always seemed to circle back to her.
Why did she leave? Was Bella not good enough?
She can do better. She’ll try harder. If only Renee had given her the chance.
--
Forks is still the same. Still the same small town with the same nosy people as there were when she was younger. Now in high school, things are pretty much still the same.
She still has the same group of goofy friends and her same gentle dad. He’s always been there for her; that hasn’t ever changed. Renee never came back. She calls every once in a while, but Bella can’t bring herself to ask why she left. Bella knows why but she wants to hear it from the woman herself.
She wanted to hear her say that she couldn’t stand being in the same place for the rest of her life, stuck with her and her dad.
Renee got remarried to a minor league baseball player, Phil. She wanted Bella to go to the wedding, but Bella couldn’t. Her dad encouraged her to go as well, but that sad look in his eyes made Bella feel the little telltale signs of anger.
She never got angry like that, to the point of yelling. She’s just like her dad in that regard.
“I’m not going, Dad. End of story.”
They’ve been arguing over this topic for the past thirty minutes. Her dad just won’t get it. Why would she want to go to the wedding of someone who doesn’t care about her? Bella knows the only reason Renee wants her there is so she can show off how far she’s come—from the little town of Forks to a stupid minor-league baseball player. Yeah, that's such an improvement, isn’t it?
“Bells… I’m not saying to serenade the woman, but at least show up. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen her.”
Bella huffs. “Dad, whose fault is that? She could’ve come to see me anytime. Why do I always have to be the one to initiate anything?”
Charlie sighs. “Kiddo, I’m just not getting why you don’t want to go. Please, just explain it to me, and I’ll be the one to tell Renee you can’t make it. Okay?”
Should she just let her mommy issues out like this? Could she?
However, her dad’s asking, and she’s getting tired of all this back and forth. If anyone deserves an answer, it’s her dad.
“Why would I want to go to essentially a random woman’s wedding when all she’s ever done is abandon me, abandon her family for a life that didn’t involve me in it?”
She starts to tear up. “Why would I want to see her ‘perfect life’ now that I wasn’t there—we weren’t there?”
Bella looks up at her dad. “She’s asking me, her problem, to see how far she’s come without me. We were the ones holding her back.”
“So yeah… I guess that’s why I don’t want to go and see her stupid wedding that’s probably gonna end up going to shit.”
She finishes with a tear rolling down her cheek. Right when she turns to look away to clean her tears, her dad wraps her up in the warmest hug.
“I’m sorry, Bells. I’m so sorry,” her dad muffles into her hair. She can feel that he’s crying too. “I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for your mom to stay.”
Bella shakes her head. “Dad, it wasn’t your fault. It wasn’t anyone but Renee’s.”
Even though Bella knows it wasn’t her fault that her mom left, she’ll always have that slight sense that it was her little self’s fault. She’s trying to get past that, but it will take time—time that she can spend with her dad, fishing up a storm and getting caught up in silly fishing competitions, dirt bike racing with Jake and Leah and the rest of the misfits, and dumb movie nights with her goofy friends from school.
She’s getting through it with the people who actually care about her.
That’s enough for her right now.
It has to be.
After their cry session, she and Charlie cleaned up and got dressed to go to Forks Diner—the best breakfast for any time of the day.
They did their same routine of racing to his cruiser and fighting for the radio station, sitting in their booth, and ordering their usual from Cora.
It’s just what Bella needed—her goofy dad and some good food.
–
Except Renee calls, right when Bella least expects it. It’s been radio silent from her since her dad told Renee that Bella couldn’t make it to the wedding.
She expected to not hear from her until at least her high school graduation, only calling her to give an excuse about why she couldn’t make it. She was wrong since the first thing Bella heard when she answered the phone was a voice filled with disdain: “Finally answered the phone, huh? Only took you two hours.”
Bella knows that voice. She heard it plenty of times over the years when Renee called. It’s a voice filled with loathing and despair. She’s only calling so she can complain about her problems and eventually about her and her dad, blaming them for how they both ruined her "precious life."
“I was at my friend’s house… Why did you call?” Damn, even Bella knows her tone wasn’t the best. Hopefully, Renee couldn’t tell over the phone.
“Do I need a reason to call my daughter?” Bella sighed. “No, but you never call without one. So what do you need?”
The older woman’s breathing was getting louder. “Phil left. He left me because apparently, I’m too much to deal with,” Renee mocked.
Bella stays silent. It’s always best to just let her get it out. “So, Bella. What I want to know is, did you tell him to leave me?”
The younger girl couldn’t even think of a response since Renee kept chortling out vile things. “The only person to ever love me left, and all I could think about, in the back of my mind, is the only person who wouldn’t want me to be happy is you.”
Bella heard gulping coming from the phone—definitely alcohol. “So admit it. Admit you told him to leave me!”
At this, Bella starts getting angry. “I’ve never even met the man. Why the hell would I tell him to leave you?” she huffs and can hear Renee mumbling, “Liar.”
That irks her. “If he left, it was because of you, not me, not anyone but you.” Bella doesn’t know how much clearer she can make it to the older woman. “When will you stop blaming everyone else for your problems? Stop blaming me for them.”
Glass breaks over the phone. “Because! All my problems started because of you! Why can’t you see that, Bella?”
The younger girl clenches her jaw but keeps listening. I guess Renee was finally releasing her real feelings. “I just had to get pregnant with you! Keeping me stuck in that god-awful town with a man that was never going to leave it. And then you turned out just like him, just so complacent. It was killing me… and now you just had to ruin my life again!”
Bella was over this, over being a verbal punching bag. “Well, sorry that staying with your family and talking to them about how you felt was oh-so-life-ruining. I’m not sorry that me and Dad weren’t enough for you, and it seems that Phil finally figured that out too. So stop yelling and blaming me and Dad for your sucky life. It’s only your fault that you never thought of actually improving it.”
She sighs. “Don’t call ever again. I don’t want to hear you or see you if you’re just going to keep dripping poison. I’m done.”
Renee was loudly rambling when Bella shut her phone. She didn’t want to hear what that woman was going to say next.
She calmed down and sat on the couch. She’s been waiting to get that off her chest for a long time. Even if she didn’t like how long Renee yelled at her, hopefully, the woman got the message.
Don’t get her wrong. Renee’s words hurt her, and she’ll probably sit on her bed later and cry into her pillows but can’t help but laugh at how, even after all these years, she’s still blaming her and her dad for her problems. You just can’t make that up.
Her dad gets home not much later, and by the look on his face, it seems Bella wasn’t the only person to get a drunk phone call from Renee. They both just look at each other and go to hug one another.
They’ll both be just fine, as long as they have each other.
To Bella’s surprise, the Clearwaters came over and she was thankful because without them, Bella and her dad would probably both be moping on the couch watching a baseball game, and eating ice cream.
Sue, Leah, and Seth whipped them into shape since Bella hadn’t texted Leah back and the older girl could feel something was wrong. The Swans aren’t known for openly sharing their feelings, so the Clearwaters know not to push.
So now here they are at the dining room table, eating with their family. Renee was behind them at this moment. She was the one who didn’t know when something good was right in front of her. Bella and her family were the best things in this supposed shitty town. It’s Renee’s fault she couldn’t see it.
This is all Bella needed right now. She was content, blissful, and full of awesome food and horrendous teasing from her, Seth, and Leah toward Sue and Charlie, which made the man blush.
What more could they need but this?
--
Well, a certain blonde goddess was sure to shake things up for Bella.