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“Johanna, can we please stop?” Emmrich lets out a deep sigh as he stares at the newest intricate game Johanna has devised in front of them, “It makes no sense.”
“Even after all this time, you are still woefully ignorant, Volkarin.” Johanna leaned back in her chair with a smug smile, “One day you will be as accomplished as me.”
“You are an apprentice, Johanna, just as I am.”
“But I am willing to test the boundaries,” Johanna stands up, gesturing wildly to the world around them, “I go beyond the rules of the Watch and the Necropolis.”
Emmrich is used to Johanna’s grand theories about her own magic. Her affinity for toeing the line between acceptable and unacceptable necromancy was something that Emmrich constantly worried about.
He was a rule follower.
He did things by the book.
The guidelines were there to keep every inhabitant, living and dead, safe.
But he cared deeply for his friend and, therefore, humored her grandiose ideas.
“Johanna, the grandstanding is becoming very gauche, don’t you think?”
“Don’t believe me, Volkarin?” The smile that splits across Johanna’s face unnerves the apprentice, but his nerves only go on edge when Johanna starts digging around in her bag.
“What—what are you doing?”
“Scared?” She casts a smirk over her shoulder as she pulls out an old-looking book from her bag. He can tell from the binding and markings that it was a restricted book, only meant for the most senior members of the Watch.
“You know those books aren’t supposed to be taken out of the library ever because they—”
“They are dangerous uses of magic, blah blah, they could endanger the world as we know it, blah. I know, Volkarin, but I’m not going to become the world’s most renowned necromancer by playing by the rules.”
“I should report—”
“I’ll tell them you helped me. Precious little rule-following Volkarin, how far you would fall.”
“They would never believe you.”
“You’re in here with me, aren’t you? You haven’t left, admit it, you are intrigued by the type of magic I am willing to perform.” Johanna thumbs through the book, finally landing on a page where her mischievous smile turns wicked, “Here we are.”
Emmrich hesitantly looks at the page and gasps, “Theoretical time magic. Certainly, you are joking, Johanna.”
“Oh, stop being a coward, Emmrich.” Her hand reaches back into her bag, pulling out a palm-sized blue jewel, “We are going to make history.”
“I will have no part in this, Johanna.”
Even as Emmrich protests. Even as he stands to leave, Johanna’s words ring true…he cannot help but be fascinated by Johanna’s movements and incantations. The small gem starts to glow, and Emmrich feels his frustration rise. No, not frustration…worry. Worry that if Johanna gets found out, there will certainly be consequences for both of them. Emmrich couldn’t let that happen, he had worked too hard to become a full Watcher to trip at the finish line.
“That’s enough, Johanna.” He reaches and feels the power pulse in his hand as his fingers wrap around the gem.
“No!” The room around him shifts as all of his senses are overwhelmed by the Fade.
Emmrich sees flashes of his life. He sees his mother reading to him in his bed in their one-room home. He sees his first steps into the Necropolis at the tender age of seven, holding tightly to the Watcher’s hand. He sees his first day of school. The day he became an apprentice.
The past fades
He sees himself rising through the ranks of the Mourn Watchers. He sees himself conversing with the Lich Lords of the Necropolis. He sees himself fighting off rouge mages and running around the Fade with a misfit crew. He notices that he is older, covered in grave gold but none signifying a marriage. Did he never find anyone?
Another image forms in the ether around him, a group of students he doesn’t recognize entering the Necropolis. The Fade focuses on a girl with raven black hair, done up nicely in a ponytail. He watches in flashes as she conducts her magic with the grace of a dancer, and with a smile that speaks of the joy she feels while doing it. Her midnight blue eyes dancing in the light of the Fade.
Emmrich didn’t know how, but he knew deep down that she was his. In some way. This girl was part of his heart.
“You twit!” Johanna rips the jewel from his hand in frustration, and when she sees the magic is gone, the jewel is shattered against the wall, “No! No! No! You ruin everything, Volkarin.”
“What did you see?” She grips him, shaking him. “What did you see, Volkarin?”
“Nothing, Johanna. I didn’t…” He didn’t like lying, but the look in Johanna’s eyes scared him.
“Useless!” He watches his friend’s retreating figure, but his mind focuses back on the girl with midnight blue eyes. She meant…something.
So he waited.
He waited.
With every passing year, he waited for those midnight blue eyes to resurface.
Every year…he waited.
Thirty years passed. He was no longer that spry Watcher who had seen that vision. His accomplishments were many, his acolytes were unnumbered, but…
He hoped that Manfred would help ease the ache in his chest, after all, it was just a vision. A possibility of a future. Nothing was ever set in stone when it came to time magic. Perhaps it was just never meant to be in this lifetime.
He guides the wisp into the skeletal body with practiced waves. The body rises and goes to work when he spots two Elven women watching the display with fascination.
“Visitors!” Emmrich tries to quell the excitement in his voice at the prospect of guests visiting him down here. The smaller of the two whips around in delight, her dark eyes shining with glee at the sight of him. He notices the second turns more slowly, still transfixed by the skeleton, but his attention is squarely on the joyful elf in front of him.
“What a marvelous surprise! Any trouble with the lift? Our last guests were stuck for hours, poor souls!”
He sees the confusion on their faces, and then he remembers that his visage is still on. How terribly impolite of him.
“Oh!” With a wave, gone is a spectral skull and his vision of the two is much clearer as he descends the stairs, “Professor Emmrich Volkarin, of the Mourn Watch.”
The smaller one is the first to him as she takes his hand, shaking it vehemently, “Hello, Professor! We’ve never met, well, in person, but I’ve been writing to you.”
Ah! The Veil Jumper from the Arlathan Forest.
Emmrich offers her a warm smile and a firmer handshake, “Bellara? My dear girl, what a pleasure! Surely you didn’t come all this way just to see me?”
“Umm,” Bellara breaks away with a worried expression, “Actually we did. You see, we need a Fade expert—”
A clearing of a throat turns his attention to the other person in the room, and as soon as his eyes fall on her…his heart stops.
Midnight blue.
“I’m Rook.”
Rook. Rook. Rook. Rook.
The woman with midnight blue eyes that are framed by a Dalish vallaslin. The woman from all those years ago didn’t have one, were they related? But she was human, Rook was clearly an elf. But her eyes, they were unmistakable.
“Charmed.” It’s all he can muster as he stares into the eyes that he has been dreaming of for thirty-odd years except her face was different, her hair was a chestnut brown rather than a deep black. She wasn’t what he remembered. Now this was just time’s cruel joke on him, dangling something in front of him that could have been and wasn’t.
“I liked that bit with the flaming skull.” Her smile is sweet as she looks at him through her eyelashes, and he feels his body tighten under his gaze. Truly, he had known this woman for two minutes and already acting like a love-struck schoolboy, so he mustered a smile and laugh.
“It’s nothing really. Just an evocation of the Flame of the Last Steps.”
“Looks great.” Emmrich feels the genuineness in her voice, so uncommon for those outside of the Nevarra’s borders. It touches him.
“Thank you. You know, I’m never quite sure how these spells might strike someone from outside Nevarra.”
Rook is about to reply when a ghostly wail echoes through the hall, pulling his attention from his two visitors.
“I would be pleased to continue our conversation after I tend to some small business here.”
In the quiet of the library, Emmrich is cataloging all of his books as he places them just so on the shelf. He would have never believed in his fifty-two years that he would be leaving Nevarra for an undisclosed amount of time. Sure, there was the occasional trip to Val Royeaux when he was seeing an Orlesian art dealer, but nothing significant. Nothing like a Lighthouse in the Fade or wherever the adventures on the horizon took him. He runs his hands over the spines of his books, finding peace in the grooves and ridges.
What was he doing?
He isn’t a spry adventurer like the others, but he reminds himself that he isn’t here to be that. He was there to be a Fade expert, and he was happy to be that especially when Rook sat across his desk asking question after question about his work. She was…
A soft knock from the open door pulls his attention. He turns to see a familiar midnight blue staring at him.
“Ah, Rook.” He feels himself smile at her soft face, and he decides to once again ignore the flutter in his chest.
“Good evening, Professor, settling in okay?”
“Better than expected.” Rook smiles at him as she takes hesitant steps inside, picking up a book that catches her eye, “That is a book about how the Fade has grown and developed over the last few millennia.”
“I’m glad you know all of this stuff. I feel like a bad elf for not knowing.” She places the book softly down right where she found it, “Don’t want to ruin your system.”
“I appreciate that and don’t feel discouraged by your lack of knowledge. Much of Elvhen knowledge about the Fade has been lost or restricted over the centuries, but with your job as a Veil Jumper; we are starting to see more pieces fall into place. What you do is invaluable to people like me.”
“I suppose. Wish it were under better circumstances.” Emmrich watches her eyes flit around his room with curiosity, “Where’s…Man…fred? Manfred, your little skeleton assistant. That’s his name right?”
“Indeed it is. Manfred wanted to go explore the lighthouse for a little while, and I would be a terrible mentor if I didn’t let a wisp of curiosity be curious.”
“He’s…cute. In his own way.”
“He will be pleased to hear you say that.” Rook awkwardly shifts in the silence as if she isn’t quite ready to leave his presence, and that little thought takes root in the deep recesses of his mind.
“Would you like any help? I’ve got time.” Her voice is timid as if she’s expecting him to reject her.
“The company would be splendid, but I can’t ask…”
“I’m asking, not you. Do you want help?” He gulps as the look on her face switches from shy and soft to fierce and determined.
“I would love the help.” Her blue eyes light up as she quickly comes to his side, and her excitement warms him as it permeates from her. Emmrich pushes the feelings down, this woman is half his age, at least. Barely over thirty, at most.
“So, Professor…”
“Emmrich will do fine, we are colleagues after all.”
“Emmrich.” Despite his chastising his schoolboy-like feelings towards such a young woman, he feels himself melt at the sound of his name falling from her lips, “Well, Emmrich, I’ve been asking you a lot of questions regarding you and your research. Do you have any for me?” Rook hands him a book with a smile, and he is only happy to return it.
So many.
“You’re a Veil Jumper.” Emmrich writes down the location and title before shelving the book away.
“I am.” The process repeats.
“You’re Dalish.” And repeats.
“This is also true.” And repeats.
“You go by Rook.” Her hand brushes lightly against his as she stills her movements.
“Varric calls me Rook, so I guess in a way I do.”
“Well, my dear,” The blush that blooms on her cheeks renders him nearly speechless, “if not Rook, what should I call you?”
“Elera.”
Elera.
“A beautiful name.” For someone as beautiful as you.
“It means our dream.” She hands him another book with a sad smile, “My parents had a hard time conceiving, and when they found out about me, they knew what my name would be. Elero if I was a boy, but I don’t think that sounds as nice.”
“You have no siblings?” Elera shook her head, the sadness still etched on her face. Emmrich knew that the Dalish had a strong familial connection, and it must have been very hard for her parents to only produce one child.
“No. You?”
“I do not.”
“Probably for the best, too many handsome men in the world would cause trouble.” Her eyes go wide in horror at her confession, the blush once pink is now a blazing red as she avoids looking at him. “I have to go, Emmrich. I will see you later.”
Elera is quick to disappear out of his room, but Emmrich feels himself smiling in her absence.
They sit quietly in Emmrich’s room, sipping tea as they both read their respective books.
It hadn’t taken Elera long to figure out a way to get a couch in front of the fireplace in his library, and Emmrich wouldn’t lie about how grateful he was for it.
Who cultivates an entire library, and gives so minimal sitting. It’s silly. Who doesn’t want to have a cozy place to sit while reading their fifteen thousand books?
His hazel eyes peek over at the Elven woman who had uttered those very words curled into the other side, both of them grateful for the reprieve from the chaos outside. Emmrich had not been trying to read too much into her seeking him or his company out during any quiet moment in the Lighthouse. He was trying to stop the flutter in his chest when she flirted with him because she was young, surely she did that with everyone. He especially wasn’t always thinking about their tea in Memorial Gardens or how soft her lips looked or how her hand always lingered a little longer on his arm when she checked on him after a fight.
“Emmrich.” Elera’s voice startles him out of his fantasy, and he is met with a quizzical blue gaze staring at him.
“Yes, my darling?” Emmrich doesn’t miss the familiar blush that spreads over her cheeks that is standard practice now, but despite that, she crawls across the couch to be right by his side. Quickly setting his own reading aside, he instinctively wraps a hand around her waist to keep her steady as she balances on her knees, and he marvels at the feeling of her body in his grip.
Maker's breath.
“What did you mean by this?” She shows him her reading, pointing to the section in question with a huff. Emmrich chuckles as he quickly adjusts his glasses.
“Elera,” As the words focus, he smiles softly up at her, “Are you reading one of my books?”
“I just…I wanted to…” The pink on her cheeks spreads down the elegant curve of her neck, “It’s just…Never mind. I don’t even understand…”
“Do you want to?” Emmrich’s hazel eyes lock with Elera’s blue, and she nods slowly as he takes the book from her.
“The Spiritual Threads of the Fade and Thedas is rather advanced reading for a beginner, but I will answer any questions or explain things in more layman’s terms if you want.”
“Yes please.” Emmrich is surprised when she settles next to him, pressing into his side while her head gently rests on his chest. He can’t help but drape his hand over her body, settling it on the curve of her waist which felt so intimate and right, “Could you read it too? I find myself guessing the pronunciations half the time, it would be nice to know how they’re actually said.”
“I would be happy to.” Feeling emboldened, Emmrich places a kiss on the top of her head before starting where she left off. It seemed like hours that they stayed like this, Elera asking about the inner workings of the Fade and Emmrich doing his best to answer her disjointed string of questions. However, as time went on, Elera grew quiet and Emmrich saw she was fast asleep at his side.
Oh what a sight that would be to wake up to.
“Elera, darling.” A disgruntled moan comes from the small woman, “Darling, maybe we should…”
“No, comfortable.” Her voice is thick with sleep as she snuggles in deeper to his side, and Emmrich would be remiss if he moved her.
She felt so right there.
“Well, I’m not particularly…” Before he can even complain about how uncomfortable he is, Elera is readjusting them, which, given her smaller size, is a feat. Emmrich finds himself on his back with Elera dutifully curled into his side, leg draped over him.
“Better?”
“Much.”
He holds her close on that narrow couch, her body fitting perfectly against him. Never before had he wanted a moment to never stop, and it wasn’t long until he found himself slowly drifting. Maybe one day they would make it to the bed hidden in the wall.
He pushes her against the stone walls of the upper landing of his room, marveling at how pliable she is under his hands. It fills him with a youthful thrill that he hasn’t felt in many years, and it more than likely has to do something with the young paramour squirming under him. Elera brought this out in him, and he was more than happy to give in to their mutual desire. Emmrich’s lips cover hers in a passionate fury as Elera claws at his clothes to pull him closer. Her soft whines embolden him as he thrusts a knee between her legs, gripping her hips to help her grind against it.
"My darling girl, the things you do me."
“Emmrich,” Her hands drop to the fastening on his pants as he buries his face into her neck, sucking and biting a series of marks.
“Come on you two, really!? People come in here!” Taash’s voice bounces off the tall walls, “I can smell you.”
Emmrich lets out a heavy sigh as his head falls to Elera’s shoulder, and a very ungentlemanly whine leaves him.
“Later, my love. Later.” Elera giggles as she untangles herself, pressing a kiss on his lust-swollen lips before bounding down the stairs to their waiting companion.
There was no later.
His tired eyes look at the block of lyrium sitting on his table, and he glares.
She had been gone for two weeks, and Emmrich felt as if he was no closer to finding a solution to getting Elera out. He was the fade expert and he couldn’t…
“Professor.” Bellara’s voice grates at him, it makes him lose the few strands of focus he has left. He runs a hand through his disheveled hair in an attempt to look more put together, but he can’t even remember the last time he washed it.
“Yes, Bellara. What can I help you with?” He tries to muster a smile, but his body feels so weak and doesn’t know how well it works.
“Lucanis said to bring you this.” The Elvish women gently place a plate in front of him filled with a simple sandwich and fruit, “He says you haven’t been eating, and we’ve noticed you haven't been at dinner.”
“I’ve been working, Bellara.” He gestures to the desk strewn with notes, none of which have yielded any results.
“Do you want help? I have a few—”
“It’s okay, Bellara. I can handle this. You don’t have to worry—”
“We are worried, Professor.” Bellara crouches down, putting a supportive hand on his arm, “About Rook. About you. You don’t have to do this alone.”
“But I—”
“We miss her, too. Please, let us help.” Her dark eyes plead with him, and in them, he sees his reflection. He looks a mess. His collar is undone, his face unshaven, and his hair askew.
“I just want her back, Bellara.”
“I know.”
“I need her back.” For the first time in two weeks, Emmrich feels his resolve crumble. He cries in front of his beloved’s best friend as the grief of losing Elera washes over him. Consumes him. Bellara simply puts her hand on top of his that is gripping the arm of his chair as if his life depended on it. His tears eventually dry up, but Bellara’s comforting hand remains.
“Let us help. Please, Professor. You need to take care of yourself for Rook.”
“Elera. Her name is Elera.” She wasn’t Rook to him, Elera deserved to have her name spoken because she wasn’t a pawn in a game…she was his. His love. His beloved. His world.
“How do you think Elera would feel about you treating yourself like this?” The question hangs in the air, it’s heavy. The weight nearly crushed him.
“She would be disappointed.”
“She would be. She always liked how dapper you looked, calling you her distinguished gentleman.”
“I imagine I look from that now.” Unshaven, unbuttoned, unkempt. Far from the distinguished gentleman who wooed a young Veil Jumper.
“You’re putting too much pressure on yourself, Professor. Do you think she would want you to go at this alone?”
“No. She always says it’s best working as a team.”
“So, eat and go take care of yourself. Lace and I will look into this some more, maybe some fresh eyes will help.”
“But I…”
“Please, Professor. For Elera.” All he can muster is a nod before pulling himself up from his desk. He picks up the plate of food before heading over to his secret room, but he stops and looks back at young Veil Jumper.
“Thank you, Bellara.”
“Any time, Professor.”
~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~
Bellara had been right, getting some real food in his system had done wonders for his functioning.
Cursing himself for being such a besotted fool for not realizing his love was outweighing his logic. How could he not though? The pillow on the bed still smelled of her, a mixture of amber and a misty morning. The book they were reading was still on her side’s nightstand. Clothes folded neatly in his dressers. She was everywhere. She was everything.
His heart ached for her so much so that his brain was too.
Emmrich shakes his head before heading out of his room for the bath, desperate to wash away his heavy feelings. However, as soon as he slides into the bath water, letting the warmth seep into his weary muscles, he weeps.
He needed Elera home.
She’s here.
She’s in his arms.
She’s real and warm and alive and…
“Emmrich, Rook, we have to get back to the Lighthouse.” Lucanis gently touches Emmrich’s shoulder, and without a second thought, Emmrich scoops Elera into his arms.
“Let’s go home, dearest.” She smiles weakly up at him, exhaustion evident on her face.
“I’m already home.” He pulls her closer to him as they make their way back to the Lighthouse for much-needed rest.
~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~*☠*~
After a bout of healing spells, Emmrich helps Rook into the bathing pool, dutifully assessing every bruise and cut that still needed tending to. Her brown hair floats on the surface as she wades deeper in like a siren in old pirate’s tales.
“Now, dearest, I’m going to—”
“Don’t go!” Her reaction is severe as she rushes back towards him, clinging to his ankle. “Please don’t go, Emmrich.”
The desperation in her voice breaks him. It might have only felt like a few hours for her, but he imagined her mind and body were well aware, in some sense, of time passing.
“Of course.” The panic leaves her expression as she drifts back down into the water.
“Will you join me?” He doesn’t even hesitate to fulfill her request. Emmrich peels his clothes off, hanging them neatly to the side. Slowly, he takes off his jewelry, placing each piece delicately on a small table before joining her.
There is no lust in either of them as the water surrounds their bodies. Tomorrow is a different story, but for now, Elera wraps herself in Emmrich’s embrace, marveling at the feeling of his skin against hers, as he whispers in her ear.
“You’re safe, my love. Everything is all right. You’re home. Nothing can harm you.”
And for a brief interlude, they both believe that.
The tear disappears from the sky, leaving a lifeless darkness in its wake.
Solas was gone, atoning for his many transgressions in his beloved Fade…with his beloved. Emmrich can’t help but romanticize the idea of walking eternity with his heart. His eyes fall onto where his own heart lies, whose eyes remain fixed on the empty space.
“So it’s over?” Neve says into the void. Her voice almost echoed through the vast expanse.
“It would appear so, at least for now.” Morrigan turns to the team with a smile, “You did it.”
Elera doesn’t say a word, but in the blink of an eye, she is throwing her arms around Neve.
“I’m so happy that you’re okay.”
“It will take more than a little blight to keep me down, Rook.”
“I’m sorry…I should have figured out…”
“Hey,” Neve grips tightly onto Elera’s arms, “I volunteered. This isn’t on you. You made some tough calls, and you did a great job. Varric would be proud.”
“Quite right, my love.” Two midnight blue eyes look at Emmrich with tears threatening to fall.
It was done. It was over.
“Now, I’m going to give you two a moment to do couple things since I think you two need that right now, and I’m going to check on everyone else.” Neve's smile is soft as she looks between the two, “Come down when you’re ready.”
Morrigan and Neve make a quick exit, leaving Emmrich and Elera alone.
The dam breaks as soon as the two mages are gone.
Elera and her bow crumple to the ground, and Emmrich barely manages to catch her before she hits the hard surface. She clings to him as all of the past months finally catch up to her, and he is happy to be her anchor through the rush of emotions.
“We did it.” Her hoarse voice finally breaks free once her sobs recede.
“We did.”
“We survived.”
“We did.”
She jumps back, eyes wide while framing his face with her hands, “I was so worried about you.”
“Darling, you needn’t worry about me.”
“I do though. I worry about you constantly.”
“You needn’t do that, Elera.”
“I have to. I love you, and if anything happened to you…”
Love.
They had uttered the word many times before, but now, they felt more real. There was no danger, there was no imminent doom of blighted gods or a falling veil. It was just the two of them…
“Marry me.” The words come out before he can stop them. This was certainly not the plan if he even had one. Elera deserved a romantic proposal not one after a battle with a God. Not one right after saving the world. She deserved the sun and the moon, he didn’t even have a ring…
“Yes.” Sound stops. The world stops.
Yes.
“Yes?” His eyes focus on the deep blue eyes that dance with delight even though her face is stained with tears.
“Yes!” Her hands wrap around his collar and pulls him in for a kiss.
Yes.
He looks down at the small bundle draped in lilac cradled in his arms. He admires her faint wisps of black hair and midnight blue eyes.
“Elannora Volkarin. I have been waiting for you for quite a while.”