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As the Marauder flew out of Pabu’s air space, Crosshair felt tension in his shoulders.
“Is it really that smart to risk the Empire’s radar again?” He asked while watching Hunter go through the motions of flying.
He knew how to do it well enough, but there was still a stiffness to his motions. His body wasn’t as nimble as it used to be when it came to pressing the buttons quickly or responding to sudden changes. He’d gotten too used to relying on Tech.
“We owe Rex and Echo the help.”
“After last time, we’re the ones who owe them?”
“It’s the least we can do for the continued help, okay? If Echo needs our help we’ll help him. He would do the same for us.”
Crosshair sighed as the galaxy's expanse came into focus in front of them. Wrecker was in the back with Omega and he was sitting in the co-pilot’s seat with Hunter.
It wasn’t the most favorable arrangement in his opinion. He thought it would be safer to leave Omega on Pabu, hell it would make more sense if they all stayed on Pabu. It was one thing to be trying to find out why the Empire wanted Omega again. It was an entirely different one to be willingly putting all of themselves back in danger again like this.
Under any other circumstances he would agree with Hunter on the choice. After everything the Empire had done to clones it was hard to ignore the fact that they would all need to stick together now. That no matter if they were a Reg or not, the Batch should be helping them now. It was just the choice to bring the kid into it that made him worry.
“Look, Cross, I know why you’re worried about this.”
“Then why is she here?”
“Because we couldn’t leave you behind this time. If we could afford to leave you, or Wrecker, or myself behind then she would be on Pabu right now. But we can’t do that. Echo wanted all of us to help with this supply run. He knew it would be tricky for us. He told me that we didn’t have to, it would be too complicated.”
“Then why are we doing it, Hunter?”
Hunter’s hands tightened against the wheel. “Because they're low on manpower right now.”
“That doesn’t need to be our problem. We have other priorities right now.”
“We’re the ones who caused that problem for them. The least we could do is help out where we can. Besides, this mission isn’t supposed to risk as much imperial attention as the others.”
“Echo assured you of that?”
“He did.”
“You believed it?”
“What other choice do I have, Cross?”
“Staying on Pabu. Making sure that Omega is safe, that we are safe.”
Hunter shot him a practically standard glare at this point. Between Crosshair gritting his teeth while waiting for Hunter to blow up with him about Tantiss, and then doing it all over again in front of Rex and co, he’d gotten pretty used to seeing that kind of look.
The sort of thing someone would do when they had so much more they wanted to say, but they weren’t willing to play your games. Hunter had been doing it for years, certainly, but with missions always happening it felt like there were larger breaks between each one.
They didn’t have that luxury now.
They didn’t have a lot of luxuries, actually.
Being able to say that they had each other was one thing, but Cross couldn’t help but miss when they had reliable supplies as well. If the Republic was good for one thing it was that. Though if he ever considered that particular gab he knew it would reflect poorly on him. He was the one who stuck with the Empire for that stability, after all.
“We’re not doing that. There will be other times we can make that choice, but we have to do this for Echo now. It’s the least we can do with all he’s done for us.”
Crosshair rolled his eyes but kept his mouth shut this time.
“He may be with Rex now, but Echo will always be one of us now. And we always help our own.”
“To a point.”
He didn’t need to look over to know that Hunter had tensed up again. Neither bothered to say anymore though. They let that tension lie in the background. The whining of the ship being the only sound to offset that unsteady silence.
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“I thought Echo assured you that it was unlikely the Empire would notice us.” Crosshair grumbled at Hunter.
The mission that they had been called to help with hadn’t been that difficult. It was just a simple supply run where they helped Rex and Echo move crates.
It was easy.
Too easy even.
Echo had even cracked a joke to him about how it must be nice to have a mission go so smoothly. He found it funny at the time. As he found himself holding up his rifle searching for an enemy in the forest though, he regretted ever chuckling at it.
When he and Hunter went to get the last few crates a blaster shot hit one of them. Hunter had been reaching towards the crate when it happened, and they were able to reach quickly enough. Every alarm bell inside of Crosshair was screaming though. How had both of them missed the very obvious intruder who was watching them? He’d have to wonder about that later as he and Hunter stood back to back scanning the area around them.
“He did.” Hunter retorted, his own blasters pointed out toward the unknown. His eyes shot all over the place though. The various noises that surrounded them caused more issues than they were cracked up for.
“He should reassess some things then.”
It was frustrating to see how accurate his concerns had been, but not nearly as annoying as how easy it seemed to be for the Empire to be able to find him and his aliit. He’d been able to gather that previously his batch mates had worked fine as a shipment square. They did enough jobs without imperial attention to prove that it was possible for them to work without any unnecessary eyes catching sight of them. Hemlock just appeared to have made things worse with his newfound need for Omega. So they suddenly didn’t know how to stay out of trouble, or keep trouble away from them again.
That was more enjoyable back with the Republic behind them. Not so much when their ad’ika was actively being put in danger with those same risks.
“It just seems to be one of them.” Hunter commented as another shot of blaster fire range out near them.
The shot itself appeared to be intended to hit Crosshair as the grass smoldered a few feet from him. His eyes then met Hunter’s, “I’ll draw his attention.”
“Are you sure you’ll be able to handle him?”
“If it really is just one of them it’ll be easier then a whole squad. This will give you an opportunity to make it back to the others. Let them know what’s going on, and we’ll go from there.”
They both nodded at each other, before taking off in opposite directions.
As Crosshair had hoped, the shots appeared to follow him instead of Hunter. It did come off as odd to him that the shooter would choose him to chase though. While the plan did hinge on him and Hunter separating he wasn’t able to be certain which of them the attacker would want to pursue. As he ran through the trees, though, it briefly crossed his mind how strange the choice really was.
He didn’t have much longer to consider it as, before he could pull his blaster, the figure revealed itself with a blow to the ground.
It was one thing for them to be shooting from a distance at him and Hunter, and it was an entirely different one for Crosshair to be suddenly confronted with them next to him. They very distinctively held a rifle in their hands. However, the usual care a piece of equipment like that was meant to have was being flagrantly disregarded as the figure held the body of the blaster between their hands. The butt was placed squarely in the dirt, and Cross already knew it was meant to be against his head.
His footwork struggled briefly as he stumbled backwards before continuing to run away from the threat directly in front of him. He could hear the footsteps behind him as well as the sounds of clicking that comes with grabbing a blaster.
The rifle had been abandoned for something better suited for close combat.
Crosshair expected to find his attacker at his back in no time at all, though when he would shoot back at an occasional glance the distance between them was obvious. There was a hobbled pace to the pursuer. Though just as he began to wonder about that he caught a glance of the helmet on the person’s face.
The quick brush of moonlight breaking through the trees lit the black plastic with an eerie glow. It was distinctively another CX trooper, which gave Crosshair all the more reason to run.
If he could get his hand still, or get enough distance between them, for long enough to get a shot in, they would be easy pickings for him. They had the upper hand at the moment, however. With a blaster obviously being held and there being no easy break for him to get away from them, it would take some time before he’d be able to find an easy way to get rid of them.
Crosshair’s feet never stopped running as he kept shooting glances at his pursuer over his shoulder. As he kept going, though, he was suddenly met with the appearance of a ravine. The treeline opened up enough to show a small waterfall above a very clear dip in the rock. The water fell down into this crevice below that was just deep enough to not cause issues if someone were to fall in.
So Crosshair jumped in.
His motions were sluggish against his now weighted, wet, clothes as he moved away from the edge he’d just come from. When the trooper joined him in the water, though, he noticed that they were still holding the blaster improperly.
Their hands still held the body of the blaster tightly while the butt was pointed in his direction. As he began to consider why they would make that choice, the CX trooper charged at him.
Once more the imperial agent swung at him rather than choosing to shoot, and once again they missed him. The water moved against his feet as he backed away from his attacker, but the personal nature of the attempt was more noticeable then.
If the trooper tried to shoot him it would be more practical. Blasters were meant to shoot people, after all, so the choice to use it as a blunt object was certainly a strange one. He’d seen them used as improved weapons a few times in more underground areas. If someone couldn’t get a shot off quick enough it was sometimes just easier to try and bludgeon an appointment instead. That only made sense if the person had the upper hand in a situation, though. Which this trooper did not.
They both were wet and stumbling around in the ravine, but the CX trooper was clearly injured in some way. They already had lagged behind because of the need to hobble forward instead of being able to run. So with the uneven ground beneath them, they didn’t seem to be able to keep upright as easily.
Which felt strange. The Empire was so focused on its troops being the cream of the crop, at least when it came to the few clones who remained, so to let a clearly injured trooper into the field felt wrong.
The CX troopers were so dogmatic in their devotion anyways. If one of them were injured it would stand to reason they would agree to any procedures needed to get into top shape. They followed orders to a fault and were focused solely on fulfilling whatever the Empire wanted.
So why would one of them go out into the field with a limp?
It would stand to reason that an injury like that would impede the mission they were sent here to execute. Unless they chose to fake that they were well to finish this mission.
That was too personal for a trooper like this.
Then again, their attacks and of themselves were personal. There was an anger in their swings. The way they stumbled through the rocks and water showed a greater intentionality than he would anticipate.
Making it personal went against everything the Empire said they wanted from their troopers, yet this one clearly had a chip on their shoulder.
“Why wouldn’t you listen?” Gargled out from the mask.
Crosshair recoiled at the noise. Another swing followed shortly, the trooper’s body tilted forward before they regained their footing.
That was too close to home.
The phrasing was too specific for any normal trooper to say. Even if they had been his fellow within the Empire he hadn’t had any peers that could hold such a resentment towards him. Not to mention that it was still unclear if he had ever come into contact with them. Normally he would have sworn he never had, but then the trooper continued to speak.
“It was simple. All you had to do was continue to follow your orders. You had your purpose. You had structure and order. Why would you give that up and become a rogue?”
As the words entered his head, his footing shifted too suddenly. His balance was sent off kilter and the sound of metal against a skull echoed followed not long after.
Adrenaline fought off the immediate impact from the blown, but the force still made him fall into the water. He was barely able to lift himself upwards before he experienced another strike to the head. His forehead nearly split itself across the cold stone beneath him this time as the trooper towered over him.
The advantage his attacker so badly needed was now within their grasp.
“Why do you care?” Crosshair growled.
“You betrayed the people who saved you.”
His face was slick with water and blood as he panted there anticipating another swing. When it never came, however, he shot himself backwards against the stones and kicked his attacker in the chest. “They didn’t save me. They broke me!”
He watched as the CX trooper stumbled backwards before falling into the water as well. Their blaster splashed into the water with the force of the kick and Crosshair didn’t waste a second to lunge at it.
The trooper wasn’t far behind him though. Both of them reached for the blaster. Their hands nearly collided into each other with the force of the motion, but the sniper had gained the upper hand this time.
His finger wrapped itself around the trigger instinctively and he didn’t hesitate to point it at the other trooper’s head. Their hand was still mid air before it fell into the water. Their helmet tilted upwards toward Crosshair as he asked, “Any more monologuing to do?”
“You will never be able to escape the Empire. But you already know that, don’t you?”
“I’ve come to terms with that fact. Things are always going to be complicated or unsafe out here now. It won’t stop me from fighting. I have my own question now.”
The trooper didn’t move their head at all, but Crosshair could easily see their fingers twitch. They were waiting for him to pull the trigger. It seemed like they wanted him to pull the trigger. Rather have a death by the enemy then have to go crawling back to the Empire and say that they failed.
He could feel his finger tightening around the trigger as they waited. He wanted this conflict to be over just as much as the trooper at his mercy, but he needed answers first. “Why do you hate me?”
Their head cocked to the head slightly before returning to its previous position. “You betrayed the Empire.”
“This is too personal for that.” Crosshair gritted his teeth, “No other trooper was ready to beat me to death just for the Empire. It’s too brutal for them. They want efficiency, but you want revenge. ”
“I was getting the job done.”
“You could have finished this ages ago if you chose to shoot. You were so focused on the feeling that would come with the kill that you ignored the easiest route.”
“Ease does not equal satisfaction, you are right.”
“So it is about revenge then? Isn’t that supposed to go against your codes?”
“There are exceptions.”
“You made the wrong exception then.”
“I did what I needed to.”
“No, you did what you wanted to, trooper. There is one other thing I’d criticize, though.”
“What?”
“No trooper in his right mind is stupid enough to keep talking.” Crosshair slammed the side of the blaster into the clone’s helmet. He watched as their body swayed to the right before joining their hand in the water with a loud ‘crack’ followed by the splash.
He waited a minute to see if the assassin would get back up. He eventually noticed that he had struck the helmet hard enough to crack the back of it. So, when their body didn’t react to him reaching out toward the helmet he wasn’t surprised.
His hand briefly hesitated as he considered whether it was worth it to take this time to see what laid behind the black sheen that stared at him.
It would be easy to leave this trooper behind and forget about them and whatever would come for them after this monumental failure. Still, it felt important to remove them from the equation. If nothing else he could destroy the helmet and thereby remove a piece of tracking technology from their arsenal. If they did wake up they could go back right to stalking him and his aliit.
Not to mention the anger and resentment he’d seen stuck with him. They were ordered to kill him, but they also wanted him dead. No sane trooper of the Empire was meant to have this sort of attachment to those they attacked, especially ones who had their identity stripped to be the best of the best like the CX troopers. There were so many other broken clones to pick from, yet there he had been, attempting to monologue to him about how he had failed the Empire.
It just wasn’t right.
If he was just being paranoid, then he could drag this unconscious trooper back to his vods and leave them with Rex. If that was too complicated, it wouldn’t be hard at all to press the trigger.
However, if he was right, and there was something different with this trooper, then he would always be thankful that he paused before smashing this Empire lackey’s skull in.
Better safe than sorry when it came to these kinds of things.
He leaned closer towards the clone, still holding the blaster close in case things went south suddenly, and grabbed ahold of the slick helmet. His fingers struggled with the water that now covered its striking design. He wondered what it would have been like if a helmet like it had been employed during the Republic’s days; he could certainly imagine the rumors that would surround it. It was a simple thought to follow when he didn’t want to confront the question he was about to answer.
Still, he detached the equivalent to their face and promptly dropped the helmet into the water.
His footing wavered once more as his heart rate spiked immediately once he saw the same face gotten so used to seeing around the Marauder.
His ori’vod lay in the water where an enemy just had been.
Tech now filled the void of a face he’d confronted only seconds before, and he felt his throat tighten with the realization.
For a moment, he even doubted that it was Tech. Without his goggles on it just didn’t look right. It didn’t look like him. His face was also smashed. His nose was crooked and there were cybernetics feeding into the edges of his face. Not to mention the bruises that lined the under part of his neck. Soft blue lights were emanating from under his armor. His vod was more broken than Crosshair could ever have imagined.
He never had tried to imagine it, really.
When Omega had told him what had happened to Tech he had two immediate responses. One was to scream, cry, and claw at his skin. A part of his aliit had just died and he hadn’t been there to try and stop it. Hell, he’d basically been the cause of it in the first place. If he hadn’t gone and been a good vod they never would have known where he was, and without that info then Tech never would have been in that position in the first place.
He was the inciting incident that led Tech to his untimely fall, and that fact was never going to change.
The second response, though, was to shut off all thoughts related to the incident.
Of course, now that he was off of Tantiss it was easier for him to start grieving. He was behind compared to the other members of his aliit, sure, but it was a lot easier to find a corner of Pabu to cry in than hope that a Stormtrooper wouldn’t walk by and hear him.
When Hemlock’s assistant ushered Omega away from them he’d given in to his initial impulses and cried out. Tears hit the metallic floor quickly and easily while his throat wore itself ragged in minutes from the wails he emitted.
He heard feet approach him with what he thought might be panic for a second, before a loud bang echoed through his cell. “Shut it. No one wants to hear any of that.”
He didn’t make any more noise after that. He barely thought about Tech at all, actually. It would be too painful to let his mind broach that topic in that inclosed space. With how much time he had on his hands it was an uphill battle to avoid the crushing thoughts that came with recollecting his vod, but he did it.
Time and time again he pushed away the ache in his chest and sucked it up like the Empire wanted him to.
Omega tried to bring up the topic early into her stay on Tantiss. A few choice words and a strong enough glare from him was enough to get her to drop it entirely. He felt bad for needing to be so harsh about it, but she had the luxury of a private room on her side. When she finished her tasks she could return there and know that her quiet sobs wouldn’t disturb anyone. He was never that fortunate, and refused to give the insufferable Stormtroopers one more thing to gossip about while on shift.
His pain needed to be quieted to survive.
If he never got the chance to mourn his ori'vod then so be it. He had done many things that were painful in order to make it out alive. This situation just happened to be one that he would have to deal with the consequences of.
He hadn’t even been able to fully grieve, yet now he had to contend with what to do now that the dead wasn’t in fact gone.
Hunter’s voice rang out from above with a, “Crosshair?”
He looked up to where he had just been and nodded as Hunter came into view.
“Took you long enough.”
“Do you need a hand?”
His head tilted back down to the prone person at his feet. “I do, yes.”
“Jump and I’ll grab you.”
“No, Hunter, get Wrecker. I’m not the only person getting out of here.”
Hunter’s face scrunched up with confusion, “What do you mean? We don’t take hostages, Cross.”
“This isn’t a hostage.” He leaned down and grabbed a hold of the limp body. His arm coiled itself under Tech’s shoulder and around his chest. He titled the head forward so that Hunter could see the profile in the moonlight. “It’s our brother.”
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Everything was so messy once they got onto the ship.
Words constantly flowed from one person to the other as the realization sank in.
They couldn’t trust the person who had been behind that mask anymore. No amount of arguing was going to change the fact that he had shot at them, that he had attempted to bludgeon Crosshair, and that he had most likely helped with the Empire in previous attacks against them.
There was no way around the elephant in the room, Tech was still gone.
Yes, his body moved around as though it were alive. It could walk and talk and follow orders just fine. The person inside, though, the mind and thoughts that had made up their vod were gone.
It was hard to say if there was any of Tech left in there now.
Crosshair was aware of how thorough they would be with such operations. With enough time, and enough energy, the Empire could break anyone. He knew what it was like to be able to stop them, but he also knew the lengths they would go to in determining if a project wouldn’t work. Experimenting turned into torture very quickly, until it was decided his various defects made it impossible to ever fully control him.
Under any other circumstances he would have thought the same would be true for Tech.
There were so many little quirks wrapped up to make him who he was. Just because he was considered the brains of the operation didn’t mean there weren’t any other clear flaws with him. For every member of the batch they had their obvious advantages weighed with the plentiful disadvantages as well.
These disadvantages, in a more normal situation, should have taken him out of the running when it came to being a viable super soldier. His brain may have been better than most, but you needed more than that to become a CX trooper.
You needed a body capable of keeping up with targets, and one that was able to take a couple hits.
Tech technically had one of those during the war. Crosshair could understand if he’d been taken into the program just after the Empire rose to power.
But now?
Not after that fall.
He may not have been there but it was easy for him to imagine how much it would have broken his body.
Of course, it was hard to gauge how much of that fall could have been broken up by foliage. If there had been enough tree branches or a pond had been placed in the right spot, it might make sense that the damage would be mitigated.
Maybe just a broken leg or arm at best.
Still, though, it didn’t make any sense for a body that was damaged like that to be used in such an elite program. With the amount of work it would take to not only brainwash him but also fix his body, it didn’t make much practical sense.
The Empire presented itself as practical. It was meant to be fixing the galaxy after the ravages of war and the betrayal of the Jedi. On the inside, however, it clearly had a habit of making odd even poor choices where it placed its resources.
It wouldn’t matter in the long run, of course, it was just the easiest thing for Crosshair to think about as he sat across from his vod.
They had to improvise when it came to keeping him contained. It was assumed that when he would wake up he wasn’t going to be their ori’vod anymore. He would view their aliit as the enemy, and possibly hurt them because of it.
So they found some spare rope in an old crate and bound his arms together. His legs were likewise wrapped up, just in case. There weren’t going to be too many precautions they could take considering how highly trained this version of Tech was.
Whatever training he’d had before paled in comparison to the new rules that filled his head. His once analytical mind had been twisted in directions none of them would be able to understand, but Crosshair could try.
In spite of all that, it still felt wrong seeing him like that. Being able to acknowledge that he wasn’t acting like their vod didn’t mean that it felt right to be doing this. His feelings were all twisted up about how to handle this issue, though that was the general sentiment amongst everyone on the Marauder.
Quick fixes were all that they could do until they got back to Pabu. At least then they would be on solid ground to start building a genuine plan.
Of course it would be more complicated than that, but it was better to believe that they could get the panic out of their system in the air and then take next steps after. Panic seemed like it was going to be the general tone for them in the coming months though.
The moment Hunter’s eyes fully widened was enough proof of that in Crosshair’s mind. His expressions ranged from horror to neutral since the moment he saw Tech’s limp body in Wrecker’s arms. Which was more stable than how Wrecker and Omega reacted to the situation.
Wrecker looked like he was keeping it together when he first picked him up, but once they got on board the Marauder he completely broke down. He was inconsolable and Omega quickly joined him in that state as well. She’d started out by screaming his name and demanding Hunter tell her the plan immediately, but her breaking down with Wrecker seemed to be easier for her than that.
She was stronger than Crosshair had last seen her. Tantiss hardened her more than Hunter or Wrecker were willing to admit, but there were still limits in there.
It was understandable really, she’d seen Tech fall to his supposed death. She’d seen his original fall and then was promptly shipped off to Tantiss. She had the privacy to grieve but still had to experience that grief in a hostile environment. Of course she was going to have a strong reaction, it just felt like a lot at the time.
Which is why Crosshair had ended up staying with Tech.
It was quieter in the bunks with him. The usual whirs and clicks of the Marauder were still there, but it felt simpler to process everything away from the others. He understood that everyone was going to have some kind of reaction to this information, but there was only so much he could handle.
His system had already dealt with the horror of the situation when he’d first taken off the helmet. The way his heart had pounded as the terror that he nearly killed his ori’vod sank in. He almost threw up on the spot.
It was just too much. There were too many questions to ask. Would they even be able to ask Tech about any of it? Would he still be there? Was his vod even next to him anymore, or was it someone else in there?
His eyes were focused on his hands while his knee bobbed up and down against the steel floor. He felt his nails run against the edges of his skin and his toothpick as they ran against his teeth. They were such small things, but they were tangible.
He’d learned the techniques from Echo whenever he was beginning to feel himself get overwhelmed. Cross hadn’t realized that was what the toothpick had been doing for him all these years, but it made just the little bit more sense. Though he was very thankful to have them on him as he watched Tech start to stir. The pit that immediately formed in his stomach was mildly elevated by the piece of wood in his mouth, but it wasn’t really enough.
His knee froze as his vod slowly began to move his head and his eyes opened. He watched him start to take in his surroundings, and then realized exactly what would be going through his head. There was an inevitable end that Crosshair could see dawn in Tech’s eyes, and he shot over just as his jaw started to open up.
His hand lodged itself into Tech’s jaw and he felt his vod’s teeth press up against his skin. He felt the hot sting of blood follow not long after but he refused to move his hand. He pressed his body against Tech as he used his other hand to try and hold him in place. How could he have been so stupid? He knew these troopers were outfitted with a kill switch already, so why hadn’t he had the foresight to deal with that beforehand?
His feet scuffed against the steel and he heard the thud of footsteps following it. He hadn’t realized he was yelling for Hunter until he felt his brothers’ hands around him. He wondered if he’d need to explain to them what he was trying to stop, but they seemed to know just as well as he knew what was inside of their brother’s mouth now. With four extra sets of arms it was easy enough to restrain Tech and it was even easier to keep his mouth open.
They were able to restrain him just fine, but none of them were sure how to remove the implant until Echo joined them. It took some time, and a lot of effort to hold Tech back, but with Echo’s help they were able to toss the deadly piece of electrical work aside. The rage in Tech’s eyes didn’t leave for a second, though, after it was removed. There was still that inescapable determination within him as his teeth ground together. His hands may have been bound together but he still had access to his feet, and he was giving Wrecker hell for it.
“We’re gonna need to knock him out again.” Crosshair said, his breaths came in harshly as he cradled his bleeding hand. “We need to get back to Pabu and make a game plan. Until then we can’t keep dealing with him like this.”
He looked at Hunter expecting a response but instead only saw fear in his vod’s eyes. He felt his own eyes widen with the surprise of seeing him at a loss for words. There was a reason he was assigned the leader of the team all those years ago. He was built from birth to take the lead and be in control. He was good at that. He’d always been good at this. Yet, finally, Crosshair could see that control slipping through his fingers.
“Hunter,” he pushed, he stepped toward his brother and placed his clean hand on his shoulder, “We need to deal with this now. If we knock him out we can have more time to talk about what to do.” He squeezed his shoulder as Tech let out an enraged wail suddenly. “We need to do this, Hunter. We need more time before he tries to do something else.”
“You’d think he’d try to find another way to kill himself?” His voice came out small, barely audible over the combined yells of Tech and Wrecker that were now reverberating through the ship, but there was an ocean of pain in it. Cross could see the agony within him over the horror he had just run into and that he wasn’t as prepared as he thought to confront what had been done to his vod’ika.
“I do. That’s what they’re trained to do. They refuse to talk and they refuse to comply, especially if they realize that there is no way for the Empire to rescue them.”
Hunter dully nodded as Cross let go of him and grabbed ahold of his helmet.
“I’m sorry, Tech.” He muttered while Wrecker began to ask what he was doing. The only answer his vod received was the dull ‘thwack’ that followed the swing of his helmet, and the limp body in his arms.
He looked up at Wrecker and then over to Hunter again as the grip on his helmet tightened, “We need a plan.”
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The idea of a plan, in the face of such a startling change of events, was truly a laughable hope. Crosshair knew that better than any of them. He barely expected Hunter or Wrecker to be able to wrap their heads around what was being asked of them when they did return to Pabu.
It was distressing to all of them and he didn’t expect them to be able to cope with it immediately. He still struggled, though, with his need to enact the steps necessary to protect is aliit and keep their returned member, but also ensure that his vods had time to grieve what happened.
From Omega alone he was able to grasp that he alone bore the guilt of being the reason Tech had put himself in the line of fire; they were burdened with the guilt of knowing that they left him behind. That as a collective, Hunter, Wrecker, and Echo all assumed that Tech could not have survived that fall. Omega may have pleaded that he may have survived, none of them believed that idea, and then they had to move their attention away from the dead to getting back who they lost.
They all had grieved in their own time, in their own ways, but they had already made peace with the fact that Tech was dead. There had been difficulties in finding that peace while also dealing with the conflict of the Empire around them, but they had still been able to find it.
And they were wrong.
His body was there in front of them. A limp figure with the face of a brother some of them had grown up alongside and others had grown to accept as part of their aliit. He was there bound up in their bunks with Crosshair’s blood in his mouth and dried blood in his hair. Even if he had once been a specialized assassin meant to kill them he was now their brother again, but the assassin was still all that was left within his flesh.
“Are they gonna be okay?” Phee asked from behind Crosshair.
After they had landed on Pabu again the others had departed from the ship to parse out what to do next. Which left Crosshair alone to watch over their unintentional hostage. When he’d heard footsteps approaching, though, he already knew who it had to be.
“We’ll see, I think they need to take their time to figure out what we can do next.”
“They’re gonna need to do that sooner than later. The longer you all take to do that, the closer they’ll get to figuring out what happened.”
“If they care to figure it out.”
He heard the ruffle of fabric and leather as he assumed she cocked her head. “They would, wouldn’t they? I mean, it’s the Empire. They care about their stuff.”
“They may have the most resources in the galaxy, but are they willing to put those toward finding a lost piece of machinery?”
“How many credits do you think they put into fixing him?”
“Too many, but possibly not enough for them to care that he’s gone. I think it’s more likely they’d be interested in the kid rather than retrieving another part of their arsenal again. They can replace another soldier all they want, but there’s something about Omega that keeps drawing them in.”
“Any idea what that might be.”
He shook his head while he watched the edges of Tech’s fingers twitch slightly. His muscles tensed as he waited for something to happen but he eventually stilled again.
“Of all your brothers I didn’t expect you to be the most composed. Not like I ever considered it before, but it’s hard to grasp that you’re just having a melt down about this. I thought soldiers were supposed to hold up in the face of extenuating circumstances, you know?”
“We are, we were, that doesn’t mean that we can’t still be distressed. They left a brother behind. That would mess anyone up.”
“I’m not saying it doesn’t make sense. I’m just saying that I didn’t expect it from you all. Especially since the Empire would be on your tails.”
“They weren’t nearby when we left. For all intensive purposes, other than the brief encounter, they could easily assume that he was killed on the front line.”
“You already checked for a tracker?”
He nodded his head, “When we removed his kill switch it should have killed any trackers in it.”
“And you checked the armor.”
He nodded again. All possible routes the Empire could have taken to find them now, within his power, had been snuffed out. What happened on Tantiss was complicated but it gave him enough information to take care of what was necessary.
He was prepared for this. Whether he wanted to be or not.
“I did. I checked it all. After I knocked him out a second time I went over it all.”
“Did they have to see you do that?”
“I waited for them to leave. I wouldn’t do that to them. They were already upset enough. Wrecker looked on the verge of tears again. I’d never seen Hunter so disturbed. They were all disquieted. I’ve never seen them like that. They didn’t need to see me treat him like that.”
He felt a pressure against his shoulder and he glanced back to see Phee resting her hand there. “Are you going to be okay?”
“I will.” He tried to brush her hand off but found it suddenly gripping onto his armor. “If I need to be the one to take care of this, I will.”
“Don’t take on too much, though. If you need time like the rest of your family, take it.”
He turned his head back toward her, “I’ll do my best.”
She let out a low noise in her throat before letting go of him, “I’m going to check on Omega. Take care of yourself, Crosshair.”
He nodded as she began to walk away and looked back at the limp body. “I’ll do what I can.” He walked over to his brother and rested his hand on his cheek. He whipped away some of the dried blood and repeated, “I’ll do all that I can.”
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In the end, the Empire never came. They watched the sky for weeks following but there never was any sign of them. It was a miracle, but they got off scot free. Once they were able to accept that they no longer had to worry about an invasion, though, they were able to turn their attention fully to deciding what to do with Tech.
There were a lot of late nights spent going and forth about how they needed to work on unbrainwashing him, if they could remove the brainwashing, or if they needed to start to accept that he was gone. None of them were willing to admit that he was gone, but it lingered at the end of their sentences when conclusions came to hang in the air for too long.
They had the time, they had the patience, but they didn’t know if they could find their brother still. The rage that burned in his eyes when any of them would enter into his holding cell barely held a candle to the slander he would throw at them whenever they tried to talk to him. No matter who it was, Hunter, Wrecker, Echo, Omega, or even Phee, he would look them dead in the eye and stare right through them. There was no recognition in him, only hate.
It was rough. There were nights when he’d get up only to hear the soft sobs of Omega or distressed murmurings coming from Hunter and Wrecker about whether or not it was all worth it. He could only offer so much help to them all, but those late nights he made sure he was there for them. He made sure Omega had a shoulder to cry on and that Hunter heard his certainty that their vod was still in there.
He noticed the surprise in his ori’vods eyes as he did. It was a foreign thing for him to have such optimism. They’d all learned realism on the battlefield and it had long been trained into them before even then. Still, when it came down to it realism and being practical would win out whenever it came down to it. Which didn’t have to mean much since they often pushed the boundaries of what clone troopers could achieve in any given scenario, but the weight of the situation was undeniable.
The best he could do to explain how he was so hopeful in the face of such doubtful odds was that he understood what had happened to his vod. Therein lied a disconnect, though. He walked a delicate line for himself between discussing what happened to him under the Empire and being able to keep his own peace. He’d feel his hands tremble more and more the closer Hunter, Echo, or Wrecker got to asking the more obvious questions but it never went that far. They seemed to understand enough to know that pushing him to go back there wasn’t going to help anything.
He did his best with what he had. What that often led to, though, was being the primary caretaker for their bound up brother. Even if the schedule they had built said that Hunter or Wrecker were meant to check in with him on any given day, he was ready to take over.
It was common for him to find Wrecker mumbling about not being able to face Tech that day or Hunter going off with Phee or Echo on a new mission to try and make some more credits for them. It felt like his vods were disconnected from the versions they once were, but he didn’t fault them for it.
They were all struggling with the difficulties of the new status quo. So even if he had to push through another day of imperial propaganda being yelled at him he would swallow it just so that they wouldn’t give up that hope. Because what would happen to him when they all gave up on saving him?
Crosshair’s ears perked up as he heard a harsh, “More cold slop?” when entering the room. It was more of a welcome than he was used to and he didn’t hesitate to take up the offer of conversation.
“Until you can be trusted with silverware again we just have to keep watering down your rations.”
“I’m not going to choke myself on a rations bar if that’s what you’re so concerned about.”
“So you’re willing to talk today? I thought you were still ignoring me after that little incident a month ago.”
“Don’t blame me for the mistakes that fool made.”
Crosshair’s hands tensed around the metallic tray. The edge of his lip curled upwards slightly but he straightened his back to attempt to keep up his composure.
Late at night he could still hear Wrecker’s yells echoing in his head. The way it had cut through all other noise on Pabu and had made both he and Hunter start was enough to shake him for the rest of his life.
Sure, Wrecker was the loud one. He was boisterous and excitable and sweet and had so much care in his heart, but when he got loud it only meant that he was excited. If he was yelling from frustration then something was wrong. So when the fear and pain in his voice had run through Cross’s head he knew something was wrong.
He and Hunter didn’t say a word to each other as they ran over but their mutual fast pace spoke more than either of them could. Crosshair hadn’t meant to be the first one to arrive, but as he stumbled through the door he barely had time to process what it was he was seeing but all he could register was the red on the floor.
There wasn’t too much of it. It had primarily pooled on the ground around Tech’s body, but there were hand prints around it. Wrecker’s hand kept itself firmly clasped over the jagged cuts on their vod’s wrist, and it was just enough.
“He wasn’t a fool. He just cared too much.”
“He should have known better. I thought you all were meant to be some of the most capable in the whole of the Republic army.”
“We were.”
“Then why did you give an enemy a sharp object?”
Cross took in a sharp breath before he walked over to Tech and slammed the tray down next to him. It didn’t go unnoticed that there were no restraints to be found on his hands or legs. It had been standard practice for them to do that up until a month before the incident. Even then, after he had started to improve none of them pushed to restrain him again.
He only ever chose verbal attacks. When he stopped squirming and promising to insist violence it became clear there was no bite at the end of all that bark. Even as he stood close enough to his brother that he could strangle him, the most he received from him was an intense glare as he waited for a response.
“Because he believed in you.”
Tech’s brow twitched while Crosshair began to leave the room. He stopped in the doorway when he heard a soft, “That was his mistake.”
He turned back around so that he made eye contact with the imperial facsimile behind him, “Maybe, but he was just trying to be your brother.”
“I am not your brother. Are you people incapable of listening, or do you prefer to be dense?”
“We knew you from before, that’s all that matters to us. That is all that matters to me.”
“Does my rejection mean nothing to you?”
“Not after the Empire was in your head. You have his face, you have his voice, and you have his mind. That’s close enough for us.”
He sprang to his feet suddenly and rushed toward Crosshair. He stayed a few feet away from him while a new found rage appeared in his eyes. Cross couldn’t help but find it interesting how easily it was to press this version of his brother’s buttons. He was usually so good at keeping his composition, yet with the Empire in his head suddenly everything had to be a battle. “There are no memories there! I may have his face but I am not one of you.”
“You’re still breathing, that’s what counts.”
“I have his skin but I am not your Tech. You traitors are more stupid than I thought if you can’t even begin to accept that.”
He felt the door open up behind him as he took a few steps back. This was a game all of them had been playing for months at this point. The back and forths were preferable to any active attempt of escape, but it was still so mentally taxing. He could see it in all of their eyes whenever they would walk away from feeding him, and it had only gotten worse since his attempted suicide.
“Maybe we are being stupid,” his throat squeezed with those words as he tried to find it in himself to not break in front of this cruel doppelganger, “but as long as you’re here we’re not going to stop. That isn’t ever going to change. Besides, we clones are stubborn people, aren’t we?”
He smiled a little as he watched Tech’s jaw hang open slightly. That spark that had just propelled him forward was just as quickly snuffed out when confronted with his neutrality.
That was the expression he watched disappear behind him as he stepped through the door. He swallowed a sob as he walked away but his heart didn’t ache as much as he did. The conversation was the same but there was something else there.
Possibly some kind of resignation had appeared on his face at the end, but that was to be foreseen.
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Months quickly turned into a year as they kept their eyes on the sky. No venators ever came, though, and while it did get back to them that the Empire was searching for Omega since they were already on lock down it was easier than ever for them to draw further back.
Missions moved from being a necessity again to being viewed as a favor to Phee or Rex. Tension could still be found in the air whenever a foreign ship appeared over the skyline, but for the most part they had settled into a sense of domesticity.
That didn’t negate the fact, though, that the issue of Tech still hung heavy on them all.
The late night back and forths were still present every month or so since they were still uncertain what to do with him, but they became less solemn. There was still an acknowledgement that they weren’t in a good place. Tech continued to spew his vitriol and devotion to the Empire, but more and more hesitation creeped into his words. It made each of them take a pause whenever they would drop off food or check up on him.
There was so much more quiet than there used to be. The usual hard stares that would follow all of them through the room had started to change into a consistent attempt to not make eye contact. It was as though the real implications of what was happening to him had finally sunk in.
It was a start. It was a very good start that even got Hunter to have a glimmer of hope in his eyes again. Wrecker and Omega had long since been unable to swallow that he was truly gone, and Echo had been won over within a few months, but Hunter had held fast on his skepticism. Perhaps he was just too burned after those first few nights and the blood on Wrecker’s hands, but when he looked at Crosshair one night and gave him a reassuring now Cross knew that things were getting better.
It wasn’t enough just yet, though. He may have settled down but that didn’t mean that he was back yet. It just meant that his spirit had been crushed under the inescapable reality of the Empire’s apathy. They’d had the process going for so long with so much effort, and Crosshair wasn’t ready to just accept that the quiet as a good enough answer. Not until they had Tech back would Cross be able to accept that they were well and truly done with the matter.
It didn’t take a lot for him to reach the house late at night. Long after all of his vods had gone to bed he decided to come calling. It was a different time than they had normally arrived. Afternoons and dusk were what would be considered ‘normal’ for their schedule, but Cross had that spark of determination within him now.
“Why do you keep coming back?” Tech asked, his head hung low as Cross entered the room.
It was his standard appearance whenever someone entered. Easier to look defeated than admit to being defeated, Crosshair assumed. He would give him this, it had taken a lot longer to break him than any of them would have anticipated. So was the way of the elite, he supposed.
“Because you’re my vod.”
“I’m not. You know that now, don’t you? I’ve said this over and over and over again. There is nothing left of him inside of me. Whoever you once knew has been erased, haven’t any of you been able to grasp that I am not him anymore?”
“Have you been able to grasp that the Empire isn’t coming back for you?”
He watched his vod ball his fists. He stood up and began to approach Crosshair, fist still in a ball, as his head continued to stay fixed onto the ground. Once he made it to Cross, though, he never took that swing. He, instead, stood directly in front of him. His hands shook and Crosshair could hear his breathing slowly begin to increase in speed.
Crosshair began to reach his hand out toward him only to find his vod crumpling against him. His arms immediately moved to support Tech’s weight before slowly lowering both of them down onto the ground. He felt hands dig into his clothes and Tech’s hand curl up against his chest. Cross didn’t let him know that he could feel his vod’s body shaking with each desperate gasp he let out. He just let his own hands move to his back and began to carefully rub it.
The two of them sat there like that for a few hours as Tech had periods where he would calm down before he’d start to break again. It didn’t matter to Crosshair either way. He’d just hold him closer, rest his head against his vod’s, and let him express whatever he needed to.
Even if there was still room for them to argue about whether he was really Tech anymore, he was still going to be there for him. It was the least he could do after he caused him to end up like this at all.
It was the least he could do for his ori’vod.
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In the end, improvement was possible.
There were still hurdles to get over. Trust needed to be rebuilt and memories still needed to be fed into Tech’s head at a slow drip feed pace, but recognition began to reappear in his eyes with enough time.
With a precipitable drop in imperial propaganda coming from his mouth it made it a lot easier to be around him. It took some convincing on Crosshair’s part but with enough arguing and point making he was allowed outside of his holding. With a chaperone, of course. It was still too risky to let him just wander around.
Again, each vod had their time with him. Designated days and times were given to each of them and each of them slowly acclimated to the shake up. Wrecker and Omega were the most chatty with him, Echo was good for conversations about the wider galaxy, and Hunter was more than happy to share stories of their past.
Each member of the aliit had their own preferences with where they would go and what they would say to him, but it all came back around to reaching a hand for him to take it. They were there handing him everything they could about what he liked, what they’d done, or even what they’d see in their time in the galaxy.
How, as soldiers, what had been both good and bad times for them. What the craziest missions they’d gone on had been like and how the tightest spots they’d been in had defined what their missions would look like going forward. It may not have made sense to any civi that would have overheard it, Phee certainly doubted how important it seemed compared to their more family based stories, but it was what had defined their lives for so long.
The Republic was dead but that didn’t change that they had once been soldiers. They didn’t need to be them any more but those lessons, those missions, were still deeply important to who they were as people. If they could get that back inside of Tech then the world was their oyster.
When Crosshair was his chaperone, though, there was less of a focus on those memories. Instead, there was a greater focus on Pabu itself.
There were a lot of long quiet stretches where they would both wander around the coast line or up and down the mountain over the course of a few hours. They found a variety of nooks and crannies that brushed up against the coastline just enough to have the salt in the air hit your face but not have to worry about the water. Each new spot quickly became another safe space for Tech when he wanted to get away.
Being watched over constantly had its strains. So, with enough trust on his side, he would slink away to those holes in the walls and feel the isolation start to creep in.
Eyes were for the Empire to use, but the sea was empty of that worry.
Still, Crosshair would have to be the one to find him whenever Hunter would start to worry all over again.
“If you told them when you were leaving they would be less worried.” He commented as he climbed up the slick rock to join his ori’vod.
“They’d follow. I don’t want to be followed.”
“I can see that, doesn’t help your case at all.”
“If Hunter is still so concerned about my betrayal then why does he always send you to find me?”
“Because I know where you’re going to hide. And I made sure that none of them would be able to find you otherwise.”
Tech turned his head slightly toward Cross then. He cocked his head with a small pop of his neck, “They don’t know?”
“No, I made sure that they wouldn’t. I told them that you’d need your privacy. So if any of them ever get worried all they have to do is get me and it’ll be fine.”
“You did all that for me?”
“You still don’t grasp what it means to have vods, do you?”
Tech pulled his legs close to his chest while his face disappeared behind his knees. It made Crosshair’s heart ache as he was brought back to late nights on Kamino. The sea and rain beat the windows in their room while the two of them stayed up talking. It was so easy for Tech to retreat back into himself back then, especially after a training session. It made him seem so fragile. It reminded Cross that they weren’t soldiers yet. They still had some growing to do.
Yet here they were, on a planet untouched by the ravages of war and Tech was still cradling himself. Even after the Empire tried to erase everything that made him him, that little piece of himself was still there.
He was, truly, still there.
Eventually Tech said, “I think I’m beginning to learn.”
Crosshair climbed up next to him and wrapped his arm around his shoulders. Squeezing him slightly he smiled, “Good, that’s the most important thing you can learn.”
They sat there like that until the black of night consumed them both. Cross knew that Hunter would fuse at them both for it whenever they got back, but that didn’t matter when the world slipped away like that.
The memories would still take time but Tech was sitting there next to him that night, and Crosshair wasn’t going to let go of him again.