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Finn pulls on the strap and wiggles the seat until he’s sure it isn’t going to budge more than a half-inch in any direction, then he steps back and gestures to the seat with both hands in a flourish. “There you go, Beej!”
Beth looks unimpressed, but she never looks impressed by the car seat, and never has in her entire two full years of life. She points at the seat. “No.”
“You’ll be able to see where we’re going, just like us!” Puck says. “Today you can see the zoo before we get there!”
“No,” Beth repeats. “No my seat a-day.”
“If you want to see the zoo, you have to go in the seat, and you’ll like the seat now, I promise!” Finn says, picking Beth up. She starts to buck and flail as he sets her down in the seat.
“No! No seat! No seat a-day, Fada!” Beth shouts, sounding more irritated than actually distressed.
“Yes seat, Bethie-girl,” Puck says. “There’s even ice cream at the zoo.”
“No. Nooooooooo!” Beth kicks her legs, but Finn is pleased to note that the seat doesn’t move.
“Yes,” Finn says. “Yes seat, and now we’re going to the zoo, yay! Happy birthday to Beej!”
“Noooooooo!” Beth wails from the back as Finn and Puck get into the front of the car.
Puck starts the engine while shaking his head. “I guess it was too much to hope turning her around would be the magic bullet we thought it would be?” he says.
“I thought it would stop when she got older. I mean, how old can she get and still scream in the car seat? She won’t still be screaming when she starts school, right?” Finn says.
“Noooooooooooooo!”
“At least we can make the bus driver listen to her screaming on the way to school,” Puck says, then puts the car in gear.
“Can the bus driver come take her to the zoo today?” Finn asks.
Beth continues hollering and flailing in the back seat as Puck puts the car on I-75, heading north towards Toledo. Finn turns on the radio, which doesn’t do much to drown out Beth’s loud complaining. They’re just outside of Bowling Green when the back seat becomes suddenly, blissfully, miraculously quiet.
“Did she fall asleep?” Puck whispers.
Finn slowly turns his head to look into the back seat. Beth isn’t asleep. She’s looking out the window, kicking her legs in time to the music. Finn faces the front again, quietly answering, “Nope.”
“Did you drug her this morning as a surprise for me?”
“Nope. She’s looking out the window.”
“The car’s still moving,” Puck says, sounding awed. “And she’s still strapped in. And there’s no screaming.”
“It’s a miracle, Puck, an honest-to-god miracle,” Finn says. “Happy Beej Day to us!”
“Dog!” Beth says in the back seat. “Look! A dog!” She taps on the window with her fingers. “Hi dog!”
Finn turns his head to look out Beth’s window. The truck next to them has a dog in the truck bed, its ears flopping and tongue lolling. “I see him, Beej. He looks happy to be in the truck, doesn’t he?”
“Hi dog! Nice dog inna truck.”
“Can you wave at the dog, Beth?” Puck says. “Wave ‘hi’ to the dog. It is a miracle,” he adds, glancing at Finn briefly as he drives.
Finn watches Beth wave enthusiastically at the dog. “Aw, he’s happy to see you, Beej,” Finn says. “Look at that happy dog.”
“I’m as happy as that dog,” Puck says.
“I’m happier than that dog,” Finn says. “I don’t know the last time I’ve been this happy.” He puts his hand on Puck’s leg. “Okay, yeah, I do, but I’m pretty happy.”
Puck laughs. “I can’t believe it worked.”
“Something had to eventually, I guess,” Finn says. “I can’t believe how quiet it is.”
“If I weren’t driving, I’d be kissing you right now.”
“We’re gonna celebrate so hard when we get home,” Finn says.
“Oh yeah, we definitely are.” Puck looks briefly in the rearview mirror. “We could’ve gone to the Cincy Zoo after all.”
“Now we know. Wow, it really is half the battle!”
Puck laughs and puts his hand on top of Finn’s. “Yeah, I guess so!”
“Dada! Fada! Pony!” Beth says, tapping on the window with one finger as she points at a field. “Pony! Pony!”
“There’s a pony, Bethie-girl?” Puck says. “Can you tell me about it since I’m driving?”
“Brown an’ white, Dada! Brown an’ white!”
Finn looks out Beth’s window again, watching the field with the pony pass. “I saw him, Beej. He was running. I bet he wanted to ride in the car with you.”
“Bye, pony!” Beej says, waving frantically. “Bye! Byyyyyye!”
“We did it,” Puck says. “We survived the car seat screaming.”
“We’re awesome parents, Puck! We should have like eight kids!” Finn says.
“Maybe not eight,” Puck says. “That might be a lot.”
“Maybe at least one more, though, someday,” Finn says. “I love having you Puckermans in my life.”
Puck grins. “Yeah, okay, one more, but after high school graduation.”
Finn laughs. “Yeah. I’m not in a hurry. We’re young. We’ve got a lot of time.”
“A lot of time, and an entire scream-free day at the zoo.”
“Hooray for front-facing car seats,” Finn says.
“I guess since you installed it, that makes you my hero,” Puck says.
Finn squeezes Puck’s leg. “Car seat hero Fada, at your service.”
“That’s the best kind of service. Two in one, even.”
“Where’s a zoo?” Beth asks. “We there?”
“Almost there, Beej,” Finn says. “Not far to go now.”
“As opposed to the zoo that’s us,” Puck says. “Right?”
“Right,” Finn says.
“Happy Beth’s birthday,” Puck says. “Two down.”
“Sixteen to go.”