Work Text:
you as ashe
heeseung as enzo
high school was all fun and games. endless shots of the big 'JC' (jose cuervo, as they would call it) and the smell of sweat and watermelon ice lingered in the air, painting a perfect picture of what high school felt like— to ashe at least.
"tara, hit tayo?"
behind the flashing lights and upbeat music lay a solemn area. an area where you'd see overly drunk girls puking, couples doing... it, and plenty of smoke in the air.
"tangina naman enz, nageenjoy na ako," biro ni ashe. all her friends were angels, except for one person: enzo.
"sus, mas gusto mo naman dito sa tahimik."
ashe and enzo were completely different here than how they act in school. ashe, always part of the student council and honor roll, never told her family her little habit. she was too good for that.
enzo was smart as well. he was the stereotypical gamer boy whose favorite subject was chemistry or some shit. class president as well. same goes with ashe, he never told his family this bad habit he has, not even his friends.
kaya sila nagkasundo.
7 years of being friends was all thanks to this secret bisyo and other habits they both shared (also thanks to student council). senior high strengthened their friendship even more, as that was when they both started vaping together after school.
"new flavor. got it from the shop beside school," enzo motioned his disposable vape to ashe, showing off the color. it was red, with a hint of yellow in it. it smelled like watermelons as well.
"try mo, ashe. kasing sarap ko 'yan." enzo joked, leading ashe to cough up the hit she just took from his vape.
"tangina mo talaga enz. masarap nga."
.
"nakapasa ako! psychology, first choice ko!"
college admissions. the worst thing on this planet. after multiple rejections, which did not seem very on-brand for both ashe and enzo, finally got in the university of their dreams.
"malamang, 'yan lang tumanggap sa'yo," biro ni enzo. "kahit school, aayawan ka rin pala."
"BOBO, DIYAN KA NGA LANG DIN PUMASA!"
both laughed, extremely happy for each other. they were a little closer to achieving their future dreams.
ashe dreamed of becoming a professional therapist. wanting to help others by lending them an ear, ashe gave this dream another chance after getting rejected from two other schools that were unable to provide her a slot for this program. it was fate, she thought. she'd always been good at listening, so she thought this was perfect for her.
enzo wanted to be a lawyer. having political science in mind, he realized that the justice system in the philippines was still fucked up after witnessing a hit-and-run on the way to school one time. all he felt was anger and disappointment, thus bringing him to this decision to seriously take up this program. it was calling for him.
"friends pa rin tayo, ah?" enzo paused. "kahit iba-iba program natin?"
enzo stuck out his pinky finger, extending it to meet ashe's. willingly, ashe interlocked hers, keeping that promise for their future selves.
"oa mo talaga, enz. same department naman tayo."
.
the first few weeks of college was not what ashe imagined at all. thinking it would be the same as high school (read as: partying, drinking, smoking) , it was the complete opposite: readings, research, and homework. wasn't this supposed to be the time to become more independent?
she also hadn't seen enzo in weeks. despite being in the same department, their schedules would never match. if one had class, that's when the other one would be dismissed from class.
as ashe was skimming through her to-do list, multiple pings from her phone almost got her kicked out of the eerily silent library. tangina, sino ba na naman 'to?
enzo • 2:31 pm
ashe
ashe
asheeeeeee
tara hit?????
me • 2:34 pm
gago makikick out ako sa lib
ingay mo masyado
enzo • 2:35 pm
so ano??? hit ba???
hipak na hipak nako dito oh
i need to hit w u
me • 2:35 pm
miss mo lang ako
sorry i dont vape anymore ☺️
enzo • 2:37 pm
?
r u srs ashe
me • 2:37 pm
yeah i quit months ago
sorry enz, di ko pala nasabi sayo
but i can go to u rn, wru?
Read 2:42 PM
ashe would understand kung bakit magtatampo si enzo. after all, he was her friend who deserved to know which habits she quit.
ashe really did quit. seeing multiple articles of teenagers dying or getting holes in their lungs because of e-cigarettes was the cherry on top for her. the first few weeks were hellish, but they got easier and easier, especially since her and enzo weren't classmates anymore. their schedules barely aligned, leaving a 15 minute gap in between for them to see each other. that was never enough time to have a vape break in the school parking lot.
enzo left campus a little frustrated, his left hand tightly clutching the red vape, while the right hand gripping a small red jewelry box.
.
"kuya, isang pod nga na watermelon po,"
after two terms of freshman year done, ashe found herself back in the vape shop beside campus. relapsing was inevitable, especially for someone like her who has been vaping for years prior to college. it was the stress and overworking herself that got to this point, i guess.
"wala kang niloloko kung 'di sarili mo, ashe." she thought. her mind running wild, she took the pod and quickly attached it to her device, taking a hit right after paying.
the streets of metro manila were not for the weak. pedestrian lanes were faded, cars probably ran at 70 kph on a school zone, plus sobrang daming manyak. the only area ashe felt safe to take a hit in was her school parking lot.
it was 9:30 am, she was certain she'd see nobody she knew. kahit si enzo pa 'yan. she told him she quit, so it would be embarrassing for him to see her back in the campus smoking area.
blowing out the watermelon flavored vapor in the air, ashe felt complete relief.
fuck this school, fuck these groupmates, and fuck this paper. tangina nilang lahat. inom na inom na ako.
"PUTANGINA TALAGA NG GROUPMATES KO!!!! NAPAKA TANGA NIYONG LAHAT!!!" sigaw ni ashe, letting her thoughts escape her mouth. this could be a bad idea, as there would be a huge possibility her groupmates would hear her.
"ashe? ginagawa mo dito?"
fuck.
si enzo.
.
"akala ko may klase ka?" ashe asked, timidly approaching enzo.
"nag-asynch bigla. so i came here, ditched allmy friends," enzo replied, with a smug look on his face. he took a hit of his watermelon-flavored vape. "they were getting a bit too annoying."
"ah," was all that ashe could say.
"enz, sorry. i know i told you i quit but ang hirap kasi ng college. i never thought na mahihirapan ako nang mag-isa."
ashe felt embarrassed. wala nga siyang niloloko kung 'di sarili niya. the fact that she confidently told all her friends that she quit for the sake of her own health, including enzo, made it even more embarrassing for her end.
"i wished you told me lang. i could've helped you out. we could've quit together." sagot ni enzo, habang pinaglalaruan yung magnet ng device niya.
kumunot ang noo ni ashe. "you? quitting? i don't believe you, enz."
"believe me, ashe. kaso, eto ka ngayon, humihipak pa 'rin sa parking lot. buti na lang nakita kita."
the two laughed, carefully studying each other. nothing changed, despite months of not seeing each other.
"tarantado ka talaga enzo."
.
enzo • 5:01 pm
ashe
ashhhheeeeeeee
me • 5:05 pm
?????
clingy mo masyado
enzo • 5:05 pm
tagal mo magreply boss
may party mamaya, punta ka?
me • 5:06 pm
where? pupunta ako if pupunta ka
im in my condo lang naman
enzo • 5:07 pm
okay, sunduin kita
harap lang naman ng tambayan natin yung bar
me • 5:08 pm
hihipak lang naman tayo enz
excited ka pa masyado🤣🤣
enzo • 5:10 pm
it's been a while naman kasi
see you later ashe
me • 5:11 pm
see ya
❤️ 1
Read 5:11 PM
.
college was not fun and games like high school. partying felt like a crime, your brain replaying the endless backlogs you have to catch up on when you go home. instead of shots, the only thing you need to go down on are the presentations due tomorrow.
ang bobo mo naman ashe, school night na nga, nasa party ka pa.
"enz, labas tayo. it's too cramped in here."
grabbing a hold of enzo's hand, ashe ran to the nearest exit, vape in the other hand. 3 hours of this god awful party was enough for her.
.
"you never told me you drove in manila?"
"yeah. my parents got me this car kasi sobrang gwapo ko 'raw."
the two sat inside enzo's car, conveniently parked in the school parking lot, in front of the bar they were just at. multiple couples also ditched the party to have their own fun in this same parking lot. others were doing the same thing ashe and enzo intended to do: smoke.
it was a fairly humid month, but the air that night felt significantly chilly. breezy, to put it into words.
"alam mo ba yung shotgun?" tanong ni ashe, breaking the comfortable silence.
"no shit, ashe. baril 'yon." sagot ni enzo.
"tanga, yung sa vape. where you pass the smoke to another person's mouth using... your mouth."
enzo knew what ashe was doing, and it was driving him crazy. why out of all places, here? on a random school night, in the school parking lot with other random people present.
"ah. shotgun? gusto mo itry?" tanong ni enzo nang seryoso. he couldn't believe his own ears.
shotgunning was very intimate. it involves you coming close to someone, passing the smoke from your mouth to theirs— sometimes, millimeters apart. you couldn't just shotgun some random stranger. it had to be someone you knew, well, in enzo's case.
he'd never tried it with anyone. he knew the basic steps, yes, but he was too much of a pussy to try it with anyone.
he wished his first was ashe, though.
"sige lang," sagot ni ashe. "akala mo naman wala tayong pinagsamahan, enz! para ka namang others 'noh?"
ashe scooted closer to enzo, breaking the distance they both shared in the front seats. she didn't know why she asked him that, but she liked what she felt. it was out of the blue, and it did feel like a rush.
she never saw enzo in that way. she saw him as a true friend, someone she'd be friends with for life.
but how come she no longer wanted to be friends with him for life? she wanted to end it all at this very moment.
she wanted to be his , for life. and the worst part was that she only realized this now.
"lapit ka pa, ashe. open your mouth a bit." enzo instructed, ready to take a hit from his red vape.
"pag binuga ko 'to, sipsipin mo lahat ng usok, ah. wag kang mahihiya sa akin."
ashe nodded. she moved closer to enzo, their faces centimeters apart from each other. eyes locking, enzo let ashe know that he was going to release the vapor.
their first attempt failed. the smoke went everywhere, only a little getting into ashe's mouth. small giggles from the two erupted, ashe begging for another attempt.
"isa pa, enz! sayang! i'll get this next one, i promise."
"ilapit mo pa kasi mukha mo, ashe. 'di ko maayos, eh."
with this, their faces even closer to each other, millimeters apart, enzo took a hit from the red vape, a watermelon scent erupting in the car. this time, he held onto ashe's face, carefully releasing the smoke into her mouth; her eyes looking up at enzo's face. he was too perfect.
ashe was able to take everything in cleanly. this attempt was much better than the first one, with the help of enzo cupping her face.
tangina. may pa-ganon.
ashe blew all the smoke out of her mouth, proudly smiling at enzo as they were finally able to do the shotgun trick successfully.
the only thing was, enzo wasn't smiling. nakatunganga lang siya, not even looking at ashe.
"enz? what's wrong? mas okay na nga yung attempt number 2! perfectionist ka talaga—"
hearing this, enzo finally snapped back into reality, letting fate guide him back into the woman he loved for 7 years.
"pwede ba kita halikan?"
"ano, enz? halikan? baliw ka ba?"
"you are the densest person i know, ashe. sa talino mong 'yan, tanga ka sa pag-ibig."
enzo took a deep breath.
"fuck, bakit pa ba kasi ang hirap sabihin? i want you, and only you, ashe. hindi mo ba nakikita?"
ashe paused, unable to form a proper sentence. she wanted to hold him, touch him, do all the things her mind told her to do to him right now, no matter how disgusting it may sound. 7 years of repressed feelings were not good for the soul.
same with enzo, she just decided to let fate take her to the right place, which was enzo.
"alam mo ba, fuck it. ikaw lang din gusto ko, enz."
ashe thought she realized too late. it turns out that he was just there waiting for her, for the past 7 years of their friendship. she knew all too well, but she chose to ignore all the signs.
kaibigan lang naman talaga si enzo, sapat na 'yon sa kanya. noon, kasama lang niya 'yan sa student council, sa classroom bilang weekly cleaners, at siyempre sa mga party, humihipak sa gilid.
ngayon, ka-momol na niya siya sa sasakyan ni enzo.
.
love was all fun and games. it was a gamble: throwing everything on the line for someone who you weren't even sure liked you or not. it was about learning how to love and to adapt to each other together, and never alone.
love was about patience and hope.
love was about trusting your fate.
that same night, ashe was reminded of high school parties with the man she's only loved this much.
fogged windows, heavy breathing, and music from the radio of enzo's car combined with the smell of sweat and watermelon ice lingering in the air.
kay enzo rin pala babagsak si ashe.