Archive of Our Own

“NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!”

Nico’s agonized scream echoed in the Hades cabin. The son of Hades was frozen in shock, as were the others. They were just in the middle of a game of Mythomagic when his world shattered. He let go of the cards in his hands, barely registering the action, and curled into himself.

“No, no, no, no, no... please, no... not him... please…”

Nico mumbled as he was extending all his senses, trying to find one specific presence. One very specific presence that he could no longer feel.

He extended his senses even further, wearing himself down significantly. Shadows around him stirred with his efforts. In the very back of his mind, a sunny voice was ringing sternly.

“Di Angelo, you are banned from using any Underworldly magic for the time being. That is, if you do not want to become a puddle of darkness.”

Nico started sobbing. There was no more significance in those words. Nico knew it with overwhelming certainty, for the person who had said them was no more.

Nico sobbed harder, gasping for breath as he brokenly whispered the name of the love of his life.

“Will… no… Will…”

His heart was empty just as the rest of the world. The person who had been keeping him together these last couple of months was gone and he was falling apart.

I’ve been broken inside for far too long
Choking on tears just to keep moving on

Nico barely registered that his friends were fussing over him and asking him what was wrong. Nothing was important anymore. Nothing could fill the giant hole that had opened in his heart and was swallowing everything.

“Nico, what is wrong? Are you hurt anywhere?”

“He just screamed like that, what happened?”

“Nico, can you stop using your powers? You are starting to fade away. You have to stop!”

“Please, Nico… we cannot lose you like this…”

“Jason, go get Will and coach Hedge! We need their help. He is not listening. If he continues like this…”

“Okay, I will be right back! Try to get him to stop in the meantime.”

In the chaos of voices, Nico heard another broken sob. This one was not his. Hands were put around his shoulders, someone was hugging him. He buried his face into soft wavy hair and continued wailing even harder.

It did not feel right.

The wavy hair was longer than he was used to. The hands holding him were slenderer that those he wanted. The smell that filled his nose, although familiar, was not the one he longed to sooth him.

It was not Will.

He wanted it to be Will.

He wanted it to be Will so much that he started crying even harder.

I reached for a hand to pull me through
But when I needed you
You left me too

“Hazel!”

“What is wrong now? Hazel! Please talk to us!”

“You are scaring us, both of you!”

“It is Will…”

Nico froze again at the mention of Will’s name. It was one thing to feel his missing presence with his senses. But being reminded of the name he used to love calling out, it was a completely different level of agony.

“Will is… gone.”

Hazel said it. She said it. It made it real, official. She must have felt it too.

Will was gone.

And no amount of tears was going to bring him back.

With this realization, Nico’s tears stopped. There was nothing he could do. There was no reason for crying anymore. It would not bring Will back. Nico’s world was ending, and there was nothing (no one) that could stop it.

Nico was feeling really weak. He laid in Hazel’s embrace like a lifeless doll, completely broken and unresponsive. His head was hurting and spinning. But he could not feel the rest of his body.

“We are here!”

“Over here coach! Hurry! He is fading so quickly…”

“Lay him down, I need to check him over. This is bad. I need more supplies.”

“We should get Chiron too if Will is…”

“Get Kayla. Or Austin. Or some other Apollo camper from the infirmary.”

“On it! I will go to the infirmary.”

“I am going to find Chiron. We will be right back!”

“Nico, please, hold on a little bit longer. We will help you.”

Nico could not find it in himself to care. Will was gone and they were still fussing over him? What was the point? It would be better if he faded completely. At least then, the overwhelming and all-consuming pain would disappear.

Nico could not keep on fighting when there was no one to fight for. He had been trying hard for Will’s sake. But Will was gone now.

Nico closed his eyes and let darkness overtake him.

Do you know how it feels to drown in pain
When the weight of the world drives you insane

He opened his eyes sometime later. There was light coming from somewhere and shining right into his eyes. He groaned wanting to turn to his side to avoid the nuisance.

That was when he realized he actually could not move. He started panicking.

Just a heartbeat later, another realization downed on him. He could not feel Will’s presence at all. He remembered what had happened before he had lost consciousness and wanted to cry again. It had not been a dream. Will was really gone.

Hot tears were running down his cheeks. Nico did not care. The light of the sun suddenly did not feel bright at all. He had lost his sunshine, never to be returned. He was once again condemned to live in shadows. After experiencing what he had been missing on for years, he did not feel like he could go back to that kind of life.

A hand appeared in his field of vision. Not the tanned one he wanted to see, but a slender and dark one, with a small golden bracelet. Hazel.

“Nico, how are you feeling?”

Hazel’s voice was careful and quiet as if she was worried that Nico would disappear if she spoke too loudly. Which, all things considered, was not that far fetched of an assumption. Nico wanted to disappear, he just did not know where he should go. There was nothing tethering him to the world of the living anymore.

“Will?”

Instead of replying to his sister’s question, Nico asked what was weighing on him the most. His throat felt parched, but he still forced out the words. He did not want to hear it, but he had to know. Who was responsible for taking Will from him?

“I am so sorry,” Hazel started with meaningless condolences. They did not mean anything to Nico, they were not what he wanted to hear. “Will… he was back home visiting his mother.”

This, Nico knew. He had kissed Will goodbye mere days ago. Pain bloomed in his chest remembering how reluctant he had been to give that simple show of affection. He was now glad that Will had coaxed him to do it, that had been their last kiss.

Nico shook his head internally. This was not what was important at the moment. He could revisit or forget those memories later on. He did not know what would hurt less.

He was both impatient and terrified to hear the next words. Knowing would make it real. Knowing would hurt.

But not knowing would hurt just as much.

I am sorry, I can’t hold on much longer
I wish I was brave, a little bit stronger

“He went grocery shopping. There was a car accident. He managed to save a small child, he pushed her out of the way. He was the only one hurt. The driver drove off without stopping.”

Nico wanted to scream.

He wanted to scream at the gods for being so unfair. He wanted to scream at the universe for taking away the life of the most brilliant person Nico knew.

A car accident? A normal mortal car accident? How could that be? Willam Solace, a demigod, was killed in such a mundane and mortal way?

Nico did not find any consolation in the fact that the son of Apollo had saved a life in exchange for his own. Will would have liked to go in such a way, but the son of Hades refused to accept it. Especially because the driver was not even caught so there was no one specific he could blame.

If there had been at least a monster that Nico could kill for revenge. Even though it would not bring Will back, at least it could help Nico to hold on to a purpose in his life.

Like this, he was left with nothing but a gaping hole in his chest.

Nico let his tears fall and he closed his eyes. He was suddenly dead tired. Darkness claimed him once more and he welcomed it wholeheartedly.

But why carry on when no one’s there
No one to love me
No one to care

For the next indeterminate number of days, Nico kept waking up only to have people talk to him and then went back to unconsciousness. All his friends stopped by but he did not say a word. The person he wanted the most was not one of them. Would never be again.

It was during one of Percy’s visits that he actually learned the true reason they never left him alone. All of them, including Reyna, Hazel and Frank who stayed over instead of returning to Camp Jupiter, took turns keeping an eye on him.

“…and I have not reacted right after Bianca… anyway, I want to do better. You have more people to lean on now, so please, do not run away again…”

Percy was blabbering something Nico had already tuned out a long time ago, but this part caught his attention. It took Nico’s hazy and tired mind a while to figure out why.

Of course, why had he not thought about this earlier? He was the Ghost King! He could summon a soul and talk to them. Sure, it would not give him Will back. Nothing would. But he wanted to see the love of his life for at least one last time.

He was scared. Gods, he was terrified that it would not work. With Bianca, it had taken so many tries until she had showed up and Nico could get some kind of closure and say his goodbyes.

He wanted this chance with Will as well. He had never managed to express his love and affection properly, always only begrudgingly obliging when Will kept insisting. Oh, how he regretted not being more honest before now! He had not even allowed them the son of Apollo to officially call him his boyfriend.

It was true what was being said, you only realize what treasures you have right under your nose after you lose them. Hades, he had never even told Will aloud that he loved him back!

But what if the son of Apollo would also not be willing to show up? What if Nico kept trying in vain? It would break him.

This actually made the son of Hades chuckle under his breath. He was already broken beyond repair. As if another failure could make things worse.

And maybe that’s how it’s meant to be

With a plan in mind, he felt stronger. The time he had spend in the infirmary helped his body recover. He was strong enough to shadow-travel again. And even if he was not, it would not matter to him, he had to do this.

He jumped right from his bed, leaving Percy and his never-ending chattering behind. He only had one goal in mind.

Or two actually. First, he needed an offering, and second, a secluded place where he could try calling Will’s spirit back.

The first was one easy. After his jump, Nico ended up in the dining pavilion. There were only a few people around, a meal (dinner maybe? Not that he cared) must have just ended and everyone was slowly leaving after making their sacrifices to the gods and clearing the dishes.

Nico stumbled towards the tables on unsteady legs. Though the stay in the infirmary helped him replenish his energy, it was not kind to his body as such. His muscles were sore when he moved because he was asking too much of them. He did not care and pushed through.

He braced himself on the Apollo table as he stumbled. There was an abandoned plate right in front of him. This was perfect. Nico started imagining what he could use as an offering.

A Happy Meal appeared in front of him. Nico gave out a guttural scream and swatted the food away onto the ground. This was not what would get Will to come. The son of Apollo hated unhealthy food, he always told Nico not to eat it, that it would kill him one day. Will would not accept such an offering.

“Nico? What are you doing here? You should still be in the infirmary.”

A hand landed on Nico’s shoulder. Someone must have noticed him. He slapped the hand away, he was not in a mood to deal with anyone. The only thing that mattered was to get a good offering.

Nico concentrated on the empty plate again. This time, his thoughts were centered around what the son of Apollo would approve of.

This time, an apple appeared.

Nico choked back a sob. It reminded him of a joke Will often told him when forcing him to eat healthily: An apple a day keeps the doctor away. The apple flew down to the ground to join the Happy Meal. Even if Will would probably approve of such an offering, Nico was not going to use it.

Useless! He could not remember what the son of Apollo liked. Had he ever even asked? It had always been Will going out of his way to take care of the son of Hades, not the other way around. And now Nico could not even summon his ghost because he did not know what he should offer.

“Percy! Thank the gods. He is over here. Quick!”

Hands tried to grab him again, but Nico stepped away. He did not want to be touched right now. He did not want to talk to anyone but Will. But he could not, because he had nothing that he could offer to his spirit to call him back to the mortal world.

“Careful! Grab him!”

Nico slumped to the ground, pulling at his hair. Rage and regret were tearing him inside. He had been in love with Will for months and he did not even know the smallest thing about him. He did not deserve to see the son of Apollo again.

He had never deserved him in the first place. Will had always been too good for him.

I’m sorry, I tried
But you can’t save me

Nico woke up in the infirmary. Again.

By now, he had spent so much time in here that he could tell even without opening his eyes. He knew the feeling of the little too firm mattress and scratchy linens. The smell of disinfectant and medicine was unmistakable in his nose.

Nico stirred, trying to make himself more comfortable. His muscles were sore from laying in one position for too long.

“No shadow-travelling, Nico.”

A mumbled, sleepy voice from beside him. It was low and was laced with heavy accent. There was a warm hand holding Nico’s and pulling him back into the covers.

“Will?”

Nico mumbled back, still sleepy himself. He smiled a little. With Will by his side, he felt safe and could allow himself to laze around in bed instead of waking up to full alertness immediately.

“Ah… sorry, Nico, it is just me, Jason.”

Nico’s heart fell. His memories finally caught up with him. His senses stopped searching unconsciously for the presence that he now knew he would never find.

Jason sounded very apologetic, probably for getting Nico’s hopes up. Which he in fact had, now the son of Hades wanted to cry again. Tears did not come though.

Slowly, he opened his eyes. His vision was blurry, the only thing he could discern was Jason’s face scrunched with worry floating above him. The son of Jupiter had red rimmed eyes with huge black bags under them. He looked exhausted.

“How are you feeling, Nico?”

That was a dumb question. How could the son of Hades feel when he had nothing to live for anymore? He was seeing the world in dim colours, sun did not shine on his days. He was condemned to succumb to the darkness in his soul.

“Do you want something to eat? Water? Or a shower? Should I call Austin to check on you?”

Nico did not deem it necessary to reply. He needed Will, nothing more.

“How is the patient?”

A door opened and another person stepped inside the room. Nico barely registered it, he could not find it in himself to be curious about who it was.  He could not find it in himself to do anything but stare at the white ceiling.

“Hey, you are awake! We thought you were a goner with how much you kept sleeping these past weeks. We brought get-well gifts.”

Percy’s grinning face popped up in Nico’s vision. The son of Poseidon looked like usual. Nico could not understand him. One of his friends just died (a few weeks? Has it really been that long?) and he behaved like nothing was wrong. Like the world has not stopped and the sun has not disappeared.

The sun keeps rising and I want it to fade
People keep smiling but I see only pain

“We came to relieve you of your guarding duties, Jason. You should really get some sleep now, bro.”

“Sure, thanks. Keep him from shadow-travelling and doing anything… reckless. You know what Austin ordered.”

“Do not worry, I will keep an eye on both of them. Right, Seaweed Brain?”

Nico registered the conversation between his three friends. He should probably be concerned or be angry that they talked about him when he was right here. There should have been some reaction, right?

There was nothing. He did not feel anything at all. The dark pit in his chest was hungrily devouring everything.

Percy’s face appeared above the son of Hades again. The obnoxious grin still on it. What was there to smile about?

“Hey, Zombie Boy, come on, say something.”

Nico could not find it in himself to be angry at the use of the nickname he hated. What did it matter what Percy wanted to call him? It was not as if he was going to reply anyway. He just had to wait a little longer for the son of Poseidon to get tired of his impassiveness and leave. Then, he would be able to go back to sleep and forget.

And remember again when he woke up. It was a vicious cycle to wake up with hope every time only to realize what he had lost as soon as he came fully back to his senses.

What was the point of sleeping?

What was the point of waking up?

What was the point of continuing to live when there is nothing to live for anymore?

I ask myself why I wake up again
When every new dawn just brings the same end

“Come on, Nico, you have to at least drink something. You cannot go on surviving with IVs only. Your lips are chapped. Will would want you to take better care of yourself.”

This time it was Annabeth’s eyes that stared at him with sympathy.

The mention of Will’s name hurt. Nico was actually surprised that he was feeling something. He had assumed he had gone completely numb. Guess he was mistaken.

Someone’s hands hefted him up and sat him with his back supported by what Nico assumed were several pillows. His field of vision shifted, now he was staring at a white door instead of a ceiling. He had been right, he was in the doctor’s room in the infirmary.

A hand waved in front of his face. Nico ignored it. He just wanted to go back to sleep and hopefully never wake up again.

“Can you hear us?”

Austin’s face came into focus. It must have been his hand that Nico had ignored. He was wearing a doctor’s coat, the same one Will had used to wear. The reminder caused Nico to gasp for breath.

He started coughing afterwards. His throat was so dry he could barely breathe without it being irritated. Percy put his hand around Nico’s shoulders, steadying him. Austin disappeared from his field of vision for a second and came back with a glass of water that he put to his lips.

“Here, drink very slowly.”

Nico could not find it in himself to follow the instructions. He did not swallow the water that entered his mouth, he let it tickled down his chin. It fell in droplets onto his hands that were laying in his lap. It felt as if he was crying without any tears escaping his eyes.

It was so weird and painful to be fussed about by a doctor that was not Will. Nico had once been ordered to spend three days in the infirmary. He wanted to go back to that time. Back then, he had been secretly excited because it had been Will who had taken care of him. Since then, he had never had anyone else to be in charge of him.

Until now.

Until Will was no more and Nico was left all alone.

I wanted happiness just for a while
But it’s been so long since I last smiled

“Oh, shist!” Percy cursed under his breath from behind Nico.

He kept holding him up as Annabeth quickly came with a tissue and wiped away the water from his chin and hands. Austin pulled away the glass and put it somewhere out of Nico’s sight. The coughs subsided slowly.

“It is fine. If you cannot drink now, I will not force you. I am sorry.”

It looked like he had giving up on making the son of Hades drink. Good. Nico did not want to drink anything anyway. He just wanted to be left alone and let the pit in his heart (it had spread throughout his stomach and whole chest too now) to swallow him whole. It almost felt as if he was fading into the shadows again.

He welcomed the feeling.

Nico’s mind blacked out again. He tuned the world out, curling into himself and examining that pit of darkness that had once been Will’s presence. It was cold and strangely welcoming. It kept sucking him in.

“Fratellino.”

Nico was torn away from his trance by Hazel’s voice. He let his eyes focus and saw his sister and Frank standing by his bed. Strangely, he was still half sitting so he could take in most of the room without having to move a single inch.

Frank was hugging Hazel in exactly the same way that Will used to hug Nico until the son of Hades pushed him away each time. How he missed those hugs now. He wanted to feel Will’s warm and calming hands around his shoulders and waist. Right now.

Frank and Hazel came closer, still holding and supporting each other. It made the pain in Nico’s chest grow tenfold. Knowing that he would never again be able to experience Will’s warm touch was too much. He could not take it anymore.

Tears that had not come last time he wanted to cry finally burst out with a vengeance. Nico was sobbing silently this time. No amount of screaming and begging would get him the love of his life back. He kept gasping for breath and coughing, he was a mess.

“Oh, Nico…”

Hazel’s voice was full of pain when she finally extracted herself from her boyfriend’s embrace and went to hug Nico instead.

“It still hurts, uh? I am so sorry you have to go through this pain. You did not deserve it. I know it is probably not much of a consolation, but I am sure that Will is in Elysium now.”

Elysium.

Of course, why had Nico not thought of this sooner? Will was now in the Underworld, his father’s domain. He could go beg Hades to let him see the son of Apollo again. Nico knew he was grasping at straws, he just could not help himself. New hope was ignited in his guts.

He made an effort to stop his tears and look at Hazel. He wanted to say so much to her, but he only managed to express his deepest desires: “Sorry. Thank you.”

Nico reached out towards the nearest shadow, grateful that it was starting to get dark outside. Without wasting a single moment, he shadow-travelled to the Underworld.

I’m sorry I can’t stay any longer

Nico emerged in the throne room of Hades’ palace, glad that his aim has not been off. He was completely out of breath and felt himself fading into shadows. He had overexerted his powers, again. He stayed laying down on the ground after managing to turn onto his side to look for his father.

Hades was sitting in his high throne. He was looking down at his son with sadness: “Nico, my son, this was not the best decision.”

The god of the Underworld sighed deeply. When Nico did not react, too busy gasping for breath and trying his best to stay more or less solid for just a few more minutes, Hades waved his hand in his son’s direction.

Nico breathed out a sigh of relieve. His head cleared slightly and he was not fading so acutely anymore. He even felt so much better that he was able to kneel in front of the ruler of the Underworld and speak his heart.

“Father, you already know what happened. I am here to ask you a favor.”

Hades’ eyes were full of pity now on top of the overwhelming sadness from earlier.

“Indeed, my son. I know of what happened in the mortal world. I have welcomed Willam Solace and personally led him to Elysium after his judgment. He died a hero.”

This was not what Nico wanted to hear. There was ringing in his ears that was getting gradually more and more prominent. He realized with mild surprise that he was sensing his own death approaching. If he wanted to see Will for one last time, he had to act fast. With the history of his life and him fading so rapidly, he was not sure they would be able to reunite after his demise.

As if Hades could hear all his unasked questions, he continued talking solemnly: “I also know why you are here and what favor you want to ask me. Unfortunately, that is not possible. As the ruler of the Underworld, I have to remain impartial to all souls, even if they are my own son. It is not possible for me to resurrect William Solace nor to let you visit him in Elysium.”

“Why, Father? I just want to see him one last time.”

Nico choked on a sob. Deep down, he had known how this conversation would go, but he had still hoped. This was his last option. And he was being rejected.

Hades stood up from his throne and slowly went to Nico’s side. He kneeled down with his son and looked deep into his eyes. He put a comforting hand on his shoulder. His voice was not unkind.

“Nico, I would like nothing more than for you to be happy. My children only so seldom are. If seeing William Solace would mean that to you, I would do it in a heartbeat. However, you cannot leave this place anymore. You have pushed way over your limits, it is only my power in the heart of my domain that makes sure you do not dissolve into shadows immediately. If I let you leave here, you will fade away completely, body and soul.”

Nico was looking at his father. He understood what Hades was telling him. He would not die, he would just disappear. And when there was no soul left, he would not even make it to the Underworld. He would not be judged and would not be able to see Will or serve his father.

He would be just gone without a trace.

I’m sorry I can’t be any stronger

Nico lowered his head, his eyes filling with tears. This was the end then.

All the promises he had made seemed like they were mocking him now.

He had sworn to Jason that he would fight not to die. Promise broken. He had pushed himself over the limit without as much as a thought.

He had told Will countless times that if the son of Apollo ever died first, he would come find him in the Underworld. Promise broken. He was here and yet he could not go see Will, he had failed him because he was too weak.

His father had expected him to come serve under him as the Ghost King after his death and he had agreed to it. Promise broken. When he would disappear from this world, he would not leave behind a soul that could join the ranks of Hades’ retainers. He would be just gone.

“I am sorry,” Nico whispered, not knowing who exactly he was apologizing to.

He could not see Will and say his last goodbyes. He had not even had a chance to say goodbye to his friends at camp, to Hazel. They would be crushed by losing another person in a short span of weeks. They would be disappointed that they had cared so much about keeping Nico alive and he had just thrown his life away stupidly.

His father’s hand on his shoulder suddenly passed through him. It looked like even the ruler of the Underworld could no longer stop him from fading away. Despite the full horror of the situation, Nico was actually feeling relived. At least he would not have to carry on without the love of his life for any longer.

“I just… I just cannot live without him.”

But why carry on when you’re not there
Not here to love me
Not here to care

Hades took his hand away, it must have become too awkward to keep it suspended in the air. Nico looked down at his body and saw that it had become completely transparent. This was it, this was the end.

He quickly raised his head to at least be able to say goodbye to a single person (god) before disappearing. He was shocked when he saw tears glistering in his father’s eyes. He had not known gods could cry.

“I know, son, I know. And I understand. I am sorry I cannot do much for you. But there is one thing–”

Hades stopped himself abruptly, tears finally falling down his cheeks. He looked so broken. Nico wept together with him. The ringing in his ears has become so loud that he could not hear his father’s voice anymore. But his sad and anguished expression was enough to understand that Hades truly cared about him and loved him.

The ruler of the Underworld was saying something more. His mouth was moving, Nico could see it, but he could not hear anymore. He closed his eyes, resigned.

“Nico, can you hear me?”

Hades’ voice was sharp and way too loud now. Nico could feel tightness in his chest as he struggled to breathe. He could feel hands wrapped around him, squeezing the rest of his life from his body.

Wait.

Body? He was supposed to be already faded away, how come he could feel his body again?

Nico’s eyes snapped open, startled. What had happened? Why was he no longer fading away? Or was this some kind of different afterlife for those who disappeared without a trace?

No, no different afterlife, it seemed. He was still in his father’s throne room as far as he could see. And Hades was hugging him. Not just touching his shoulder in passing, but actually and truly hugging him.

The next thing Nico knew was that his body was solid again. Or semi-solid was perhaps a better term. It was a very weird sensation, nothing he had ever experienced before. He looked around, confused.

When Hades saw that he was moving, he let go of him and let him sit up. Nico’s eyes scanned the throne room blinking slowly to get used to the light of the torches lining the walls. He did not remember the torches ever hurting his eyes like this before. Something was definitely strange.

“How are you feeling? Do not worry, you will get used to it in no time.”

Hades was frantic for some reason. Nico stopped his virtual tour of the throne room and looked back at his father. Was he… apologetic?

“I am sorry, son… but this was the only thing I could think of to save you.”

Nico blinked slowly, not understanding what his father was talking about. The ruler of the Underworld gestured to the ground awkwardly, avoiding his eyes.

Nico followed the direction and got the biggest shock of his life. He saw his own body sprawled there, lifeless. He did not need to check to be certain of that. Even more slowly, he examined his hands. Yes, there was doubt. He was a ghost now!

“Thank you, Father!”

Nico’s ghost heart was overflowing with gratitude. His father had saved him! He would not disappear into nothingness, he would be able to continue living (if it can be said that ghosts lived, but that was just a minor detail) in the Underworld.

He could not contain his happiness and did something he would have never thought of trying. He hugged the ruler of the Underworld. Hades looked at him in surprise and returned the hug after a few seconds.

“You are not angry with me? I basically killed you just now.”

After they extracted themselves from the hug, somewhat awkwardly, not used to the gesture in general, Hades finally faced his son. He sounded so unsure it was almost laughable. Gods were never unsure of their own actions and decisions.

“You just saved me, Father,” Nico corrected the statement.

He saw Hades give out a long sigh of relief. It must have ben weighing on him really heavily that he had killed (ghostified) his own son. The god regained his bearings quickly after that. He cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders.

“Anyway, since you did not go through judgement as any normal soul, you are not assigned any specific place in the Underworld. You will be expected to assume your duties as the Ghost King and work by my side.” He said all seriously and solemnly. But Nico could see a shadow of a smile his father was trying to hide.

“Of course, Father. I will do my very best to live up to your standards. And where am I expected to reside when I do not have any specific place assigned in the Underworld as you have put it?”

Nico joined in on the game. Fighting a smile of his own. He had a good idea where this was going. His father did not disappoint, he even blinked to underline his statement.

“I believe you know where entrance to Elysium is. Whenever you are off duty, of course.”

Nico fought back the urge to hug his father again. He only agreed in the same solemn and official manner.

“Of course.”

If there’s a place where I could be free
Then maybe that’s where I am meant to be

Nico hurried through the gates of Elysium, his head whipping from side to side so quickly he would have hurt his neck if he still had a mortal body. If that was the case, he could have also gotten a heart attack from how quickly his heart would have been pounding.

He succeeded in the end, all thanks to his father. He would be able to see Will soon.

Nico stopped abruptly. He did not have to go searching the whole Elysium for the love of his life. For Will was standing right in front of him. He must have been waiting by the entrance the whole time.

The son Hades started running again, quickly closing the few steps that still separated him from the son of Apollo. Will opened his arms and Nico threw himself at him full speed. It was lucky they were both ghosts, otherwise they would have been reduced to a pile of bones on the ground.

Nico trapped Will’s lips in the longest kiss of his life (or afterlife now?). He did not want to regret anything anymore, he was not going to hide his feelings and affection ever again. Will easily returned the kiss and they stayed like that for a whole eternity.

Until the son of Apollo pulled away and observed Nico attentively. Then, he frowned and understanding bloomed in his eyes. He was horrified now: “Nico, tell me you did not…”

Nico was glad he could not blush anymore. He shrugged his shoulders and gave Will an apologetic half smile: “Sorry, sunshine, I could not do it without you.”

“Neeks…” Will looked like he was about to cry, both his eyes and his voice were filled with such deep sadness it was breaking Nico’s non-existent heart.

He hurried to reassure him. He did not want to start their eternity with Will feeling responsible for his death.

“I did not kill myself, I swear!” Will gave him a doubtful look. “At least not intentionally. I shadow-travelled to the Underworld to beg my father to let me see you. But I kind of… was not ready.”

Will was about to retort, probably something along the lines that he had told him so, but Nico did not let him. He had so much on his shoulders that he needed to get everything off and clear the air between them.

Now that he was talking about it, he could see what a huge stupidity he had done. He would for the life of him never tell Will the full story of what he had been doing (or not doing) after the other’s death. He was too ashamed to admit any of it aloud.

“I know, I know, you told me no Underworldly stuff until you said so. But it was an emergency. You were not there anymore and I did not know what to do…”

“Oh Nico…”

Will’s expression cleared and he hugged Nico tightly. The son of Hades melted into his arms. They were not as warm as he was used to, but he would still pick them without a second of hesitation over anyone else’s.

“I am sorry I left you like that. And I am not mad at you. I am just sad that you are down here too. I would have liked for you to go on living with everyone else.”

After a while, Nico finally shrugged his shoulders. He was fine with this arrangement and he wanted Will to know it.

“I would have come down here eventually anyway. I was always destined to end up working with my father after I died. It just came to it a little earlier. On the bright side, you are here with me now so it is not bad at all. We have a whole eternity ahead of us.”

Will’s smile brightened the whole Underworld and healed the hungry pit of darkness in Nico’s chest. Everything was alright now.

I’m sorry, I tried
I really tried
But you can’t save me