Work Text:
There’s nothing ever fun about goodbyes.
Sure it’s not the same as saying goodbye to your friends on a school day, knowing that you’re gonna see them tomorrow. It’s the goodbyes with time and distance in between them. It’s family you only see at reunions. It’s friends who have moved far away. It’s a headstone and some grass.
(He hasn’t been to Ben’s gravestone since Before the blip. He hasn’t been to his parent’s gravestone since Before. In a world that’s gotten so many loved ones back, it feels selfish to miss the people he’ll never see again.)
Peter hates goodbyes. He’s always disliked them but these days he feels as though he’s leaving a piece of himself behind, terrified he’ll never get it back. His eyes dart to the lake house he wishes he could call home, pausing on the young girl crying in her mother’s arms. They’d already said their goodbyes. Over the ten months he’s known Morgan Stark, it’s never gotten easier to say goodbye to the little girl.
(It’s never gotten easier to say goodbye to family.)
(It’s something he’s all too familiar with.)
(Peter Parker: an expert at goodbyes.)
Aunt May is silently putting his suitcase in the trunk. Her face is stoney and there’s a guilt in her eyes that Peter’s never seen before. The week at the lakehouse had been unexpected, not unwanted. May had called Mr. Stark late Friday night to ask if he’d been able to keep Peter for the next week. Mr. Stark had gladly welcomed him.
Peter was grateful for the week together. School started in a couple weeks and then Peter wouldn’t get to be able to see the Starks as much. Between Spider-man, learning to drive, and visiting the Starks, Peter’s summer had been full. Things are finally getting back to normal after half the world came back. There hadn’t been any school since the blip. The buildings had been converted to emergency shelters for those displaced and for those missing. But Stark Industries had done a lot to help with reuniting families and finding places for the displaced people to live and a few schools had been emptied to restart school in the fall.
Midtown still wasn’t open but a local high school was. May had decided that it would be better to send Peter there than wait for Midtown to reopen. He knew his being back was stressful for her and he’d go wherever she wanted if it helped her.
May hadn’t been blipped. No, she’d been one of the ones left to mourn. She’d been left to try to rebuild a life without him. She works at a different hospital, lives in a different apartment, and has a different schedule. When he’d first knocked on her door ten months ago, she’d started to cry and refused to let him in. It stung but he’d seen the way five years had changed her. Her hair was thinner, her skin paler, her clothes baggier. She’d survived and Peter is still learning the cost.
“Say goodbye, Peter.” May’s voice has an air of finality that twists something in his chest. “We’ve got to go.”
Peter turns to Mr. Stark. The older man hasn’t left his side since they came outside. Mr. Stark’s dark eyes are watching May, examining and hard. He knows that May spends a couple hours on the phone with r. Stark a week. He knows they spend hours talking about him . He knows that May complains about his eating and crime-fighting and sleep habits and he doesn’t know what Mr. Stark complains about.
(He doesn’t want to know. The older man’s become like a father to him over the last ten months and he couldn’t bear to hear that Mr. Stark doesn’t like him. It already hurts enough that May hates buying extra food and giving up her office and her Wine Wednesdays with her new friends.)
(Mr. Stark does so much for him. He helps with May’s grocery bills and pays for Peter’s Driver’s Ed and has Peter driven the two hours to the lake house for the weekends. Logically, Peter knows the man has too much money to notice these little things but it feels like a lot when he looks are May’s bare pantry and the bills she leaves on the counter.)
(Mr. Stark almost gave up his life to save the world. He would have given his life if the other Avengers hadn’t of grabbed his hands when Mr. Stark snapped Thanos’ glove. He doesn’t need to be giving up anymore for little Peter Parker: an expert at needing too much.)
Mr. Stark tugs him into his arms and Peter grips him tightly. He presses his face against the lighting scarred neck and listens to the uneven heartbeat. Mr. Stark’s arms cage him in and Peter reminds himself that there’s no gravestone this time. Mr. Stark is alive and he’ll see him again soon.
Peter hates goodbyes.
He especially hates saying goodbye to Mr. Stark.
May’s quiet on the trip home.
She opens her mouth to speak a couple times but never follows through. She’s tapping on the steering wheel, a sign Peter knows signals her anxiety. She’s counting her breathing and releasing it in counts too, something she learned from her therapist. There are dark bags under her eyes and her frame is tense.
He doesn’t know what to say to her. He’s tried so hard for her over the last ten months. Since she let him into the apartment, he’s not known what to say. Only days had passed for him and a lifetime for May. She’d survived the blip. She’d survived losing him. And somehow she’s got to survive getting him back.
(He’s never felt more like a burden than during these ten months. Peter Parker: a burden to everyone he loves. May had to spend hours reworking her budget for him. She took more shifts at the hospital. She gave up nights with her friends to patch him up when he came back from patrol. All the while, she grew more and more haggard.)
(So he’s tried his best to be helpful. He’s extra careful on patrol and has learned how to find the balance between hungry and just full enough. He makes up plans with friends so she can go out or have a free evening. He stays in his office-turned-room and tries not to bother his aunt.)
(There have been good days. There’s been days that feel like normal. When May arrives home with a box of pizza and tells him that she’s introducing him to some of the movies he’s missed. When May gets up to cook him a blackened breakfast and asks him about Driver’s Ed. When May wipes the blood away from his eyes and teases him about impressing the girls with his bad-boy look. There have been good days and he can almost forget how hard was for May to try.)
“You’d do something for me if it helped me, right Peter?” May finally asks, her voice dull.
Peter looks at his aunt, slipping his phone into his hoodie pocket on the floor and forcing himself to smile. “As long as it’s not illegal, yeah.”
May’s lips curl faintly. They lapse back into silence. Another half hour goes by before they stop for dinner. May looks at him over her fries. “Do you think you could live somewhere other than the city?”
Peter frowns. “I don’t know.” He thinks of the lake house tucked back in the woods. “I think that maybe I could. It would be weird at first but I don’t think it would be bad. Didn’t you grow up a couple hours from the city?”
May nods. “Yeah, I grew up closer to Buffalo. We lived in the middle of nowhere. I met your Uncle Ben in college and followed him to the city.” She doesn’t meet his eyes. “I think you’d like living outside the city.”
She doesn’t speak for the rest of the meal.
They’re a half hour from the city when she speaks again. Peter’s been trying to ignore the sense of dread growing in him. It’s not his Spidey-Sense going off. Not this is normal human fear twisting up his stomach.
“I had a hearing on Friday.” May’s voice is firm.
“What for?” Peter’s head whips up to look at her. He’s known a few times growing up that either May or Ben would have to appear in court for various reasons but it’s been a while since that happened. He wonders if something happened with one of her patients.
“For you.”
Peter’s world narrows in. “For me?”
“Yeah,” May answers faintly. “I contacted ACS three weeks ago.”
She won’t look at him.
(Enter Peter Parker: a burden)
“What does that mean?” Peter wants to curl into a ball. He wants to know what this all means. He wants to know what surviving has cost her. “May?”
“I contacted child services. The hearing on Friday was to determine whether or not to terminate my rights to you.” May’s fingers are tapping on the steering wheel.
Peter thinks of everything he knows about the legal system and child services. When he was eight, the neighbor boy’s parents who lived two stories up were killed in a car accident. ACS had come and taken the boy into Foster Care. That had been new to Peter. He’d spent a few months in Foster Care when he was six and his parents died. May and Ben had gotten him out but he didn’t know a lot about it. When his neighbor moved out, Peter had asked May and Ben about Foster Care. They’d explained about parents and guardians and legal rights.
(They’d scared him with their answers. They’d told him that children without parents went into Foster Care. They’d told him the children whose parents couldn’t take care of them went into Foster Care. They’d told him that Foster Care was supposed to help the kids find new homes. They’d told him that it didn’t always work.)
(Oh Peter, Ben had said as he pulled him onto his lap. You never have to worry about this. I’ll never give you up. You’ll be stuck with me til you’re old and gray.)
(Foster Care has been the boogie man in Peter’s nightmares since he was eight and he’s never gotten over it.)
“They didn’t terminate your rights, right? May? They couldn’t have.” Peter’s voice is hoarse and his heart is pounding.
“They did.”
They pull up in front of a house Peter’s never seen before.
His eyes are red-rimmed and his hands trembling as May turns off the car. She shifts and finally meets his gaze. “We’re meeting with my lawyer tonight, Peter. He’s going to ask you a very important question and I need you to say yes.”
“What’s the question?” Peter whispers, his head aching.
“Do you consent to the state becoming your legal guardian? You have to say yes, Peter.” May’s expression is insistent. “Do you understand?”
Peter shakes his head, tears clogging his throat. “Why? I don’t understand why this is happening.”
“Because, Peter.” May’s face saddens and he’s reminded of the day he knocked on her door. “Because I can’t do this anymore. My therapist says I’ve regressed. I’m more depressed than I was four years ago. I miss my routine and my home. That isn’t fair to you and so I’m doing the only thing I can for you.”
“By giving me up?”
“By giving you a chance away from me.” May reaches out and brushes a curl off his forehead. “I love you, Peter but I can’t take care of you right now. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to do it again. I lost so much when you disappeared. You were gone and Ben’s gone and I had no one. I survived as best I could and I’m glad you’re back. But this is what’s best for you and me.”
“By giving me up?” Peter repeats. He shoves his palm against his head, trying to loosen the band tightening around his chest. His fingers dig into his chest. “May, please. I don’t need things to go back to the way things were. I’m older now. I don’t need you as much. Just let me stay. I’ll be good. I’ll help out more. I can get a job. May, please.”
She rubs a thumb over his forehead and cups his cheek. “You look so much like Ben some days I almost can’t stand it.”
Tears sting his eyes and he jerks away from her. “Don’t do this, May.”
“It’s only two years, Peter. Then you’ll be on your own and we can reconnect then.” May pulls her arm back. “You said you would do something for me if it helped me, Peter. This will help me.”
(Peter’s supposed to be a hero. He’s supposed to help people.)
(But this doesn’t feel like helping. This feels like orange skies and his body tearing apart. This feels like Ben’s blood on his fingers and listening to his heart still. This feels like everything he’s been afraid of since he was eight.)
(This feels like goodbye.)
“Please, Peter.”
(This is goodbye.)
“Okay.” He doesn’t look at her. He can’t look at her. Fear is strangling him and he can’t breathe anymore. He can’t stop crying.
“Thank you, Peter.”
It hits him on the doorstep.
“Wait, wait, wait, May.” Peter turns to her. “What about Mr. Stark? Can’t I stay with him? You don’t have to give up any rights. I’ll just stay with him and be out of your hair. We wouldn’t even need ACS.”
May sighs, her finger poised on the doorbell. “I thought about asking him. He seems fond of you. But when I talked to him, he mentioned that they’ve got some projects coming up and how they’re gonna start looking into schools for Morgan and how much Pepper’s been working. Plus Tony’s been working with the Avengers more. I don’t think he would have time for you and their family doesn’t need another person.”
“You didn’t even ask him?” Peter’s voice breaks as May presses the button.
“I didn’t need to.” There are years of survival in May’s eyes. Years of grief. Peter is finally learning what it cost her to survive. “I already knew the answer.”
He left his phone in May’s car.
He doesn’t realize it until she’s already gone. He’d answered the lawyer’s questions and taken his suitcase out of May’s hands and she was gone. She’d cupped his face one last time, promised that she loved him and that this was best for him, and never looked back.
The lawyer had explained that Peter would be spending the night in his home and the following morning an ACS field officer would be coming to pick him up. The lawyer explained that May had wanted him to go directly into a home and not a group home and they’d done their best to comply with her wishes.
(She hadn’t listened to his wishes. She hadn’t let him stay. She’d been gone before he could even protest.)
(Enter Peter Parker: unwanted and given up)
The lawyer took him to a small room in the hallway off the living room and left Peter there. The sun was setting and the sky was a painting of pinks and oranges. Peter turns away from the scene and lies down on the bed. He wraps his arms around himself and cries.
He wonders what May’s gonna say to Mr. Stark.
Will she tell him what she’s done? Did he know already? He flinches at the thought. Had May called him to complain about the hearing and what the judge said? Did she tell Mr. Stark about her plans to give him up? Did Mr. Stark take him for the week, knowing that it was the last piece of normal Peter would ever get?
He can’t imagine Mr. Stark being that cruel. Maybe years ago when Peter had first met him. But even then Peter would never have said that Mr. Stark was cruel. Rude, sure. Harsh and rough around the edges, yeah but those things had eased as Peter spent more time in the lab with him. Peter has started to know a Tony Stark that was caring and intentional. He was smart and vicious but also loyal and protective. He’d seen the plans for a suit for Pepper. He’d listened as Mr. Stark and Happy teased each other.
He’d never known Mr. Stark to be cruel so he must not have known.
(But would he do anything once he found out? Would he try and find him? Would he even want to? May hadn’t been wrong. He and Mr. Stark have talked about the plans for a new Avengers compound and trying to find the heroes that have gone off the grid. They’d talked about finding Wanda Maximoff and helping Sam Wilson train with the shield.)
(Mrs. Stark had talked about Morgan starting Preschool and how nervous they were. She’d talked about the SI projects she’s looking forward to. She’d talked about how expensive things were in the economy right now.)
(Maybe May was right. Maybe Mr. Stark has too much on his plate right now to handle him. Even if May had asked, she’d spent hours complaining to the man. Mr. Stark knew just how annoying and expensive and draining he was.)
The car he’s in hits a pothole and his reflexes stop him from smacking his head against the car window. The ACS Field Office introduced herself as Lizzy Costello when she ushered him into her Prius. They are taking the same route that Happy takes to get to the Stark’s lake house. But Lizzy Costello isn’t talking about the Starks. She’s talking about a pair of siblings who own a farm. She’s talking about the high school in walking distance from his new home. She’s talking about farm chores and life skills.
They pass the exit for the lake house and Peter subtly wipes his face.
Jake shows him around the farm, talking about the things he’ll be expected to help out with. The older man is kind and he’s gentle as he leads Peter around. Neither Jake nor his sister Bea have commented on his red-rimmed eyes or his trembling. They had taken one look at him and Jake had been leading him outside. Bea had stayed behind to talk to Lizzy Costello and take his things to his new room.
Peter appreciates the distraction. Many of the animals he’d never seen in person before. The chickens ran from him and the cows looked unimpressed by him. He’d seen horses in a few parades but never this close. Jake promised to teach him to ride.
(Morgan would love it here. She loves her alpaca but animals are one of her favorite things at almost five years old. She can make all the sounds and has a growing collection of stuffed animals that Happy secretly adds to once a week.)
(Morgan would love it here and Peter would be glad to stay here if that meant she was here. He would gladly stay in the yellow house with green shutters. He would gladly learn to ride and feed the chickens and help with the haying if that meant the Starks were with him.)
(Goodbyes were harder with time and distance between them.)
Dinner is quiet. Lizzy Costello left before Bea started cooking and Peter came back into the house. He’s not upset she left. Only upset that he missed his chance to ask her about getting his phone from May. Jake sits at the head of the table and Bea to his right. Peter sits across from her and doesn’t say a word as they eat the chicken, veggies, and mashed potatoes.
(It’s better than anything May’s ever cooked and it makes him want to break down again.)
Bea shows him to his new room and tells him that she and Jake will be in the living room if he wants to come out and join them. “It’s gonna be hard, hon.” She pulls him into a gentle hug. “But it’ll get better. I promise. Not everyone is like your aunt. You don’t have to ever leave this house unless you want to. We’ll never kick you out.”
He leans into her embrace, picturing May. When that hurts too much, he pictures Pepper Stark. Bea pulls away too soon and leaves him to his new space. He picks up his suitcase and puts it on the bed to unpack. His week’s worth of clothes barely fill a drawer of the dresser. When he lifts one of his shirts to his face, he can faintly smell the laundry detergent that Pepper uses for her family.
It smells like home.
He starts school on Thursday.
The school is two miles down the road from Jake and Bea’s house and it’s an easy walk. He’s been at the house for two days and he’s eager to get away. The chores around the farm aren’t hard for him; just unfamiliar. He follows Jake around and watches what the older man does. Jake’s hair is gray but he lifts bails of hay with ease.
Bea reminds him too much of how May used to be. She’s warm and comforting and genuinely wants to get to know him. She asks him questions about himself each time he enters the room. She starts making some of his favorite foods. She pulls him into hugs first thing in the morning and before she says goodnight.
The school isn’t very big. Smaller than Midtown. Most of his classes have between ten and fifteen students in them. Thankfully, this is the beginning of the school year so his arrival isn’t too noticeable. Unfortunately, the school doesn’t typically get new kids so everyone knows that he’s new.
He learns a lot on his first two days of school. He learns that Jake and Bea have been taking in teenagers for years. They take them in, love on them, and help them find a life after high school. One of Peter’s new teachers introduces himself as one of Jake and Bea’s Foster kids. He promises that Jake and Bea were the best things that happened to him and that Peter can trust them.
He learns that he misses his best friend. He misses Ned. He hasn’t seen Ned in a couple months since he moved out of the city. What was left of his family after the blip had moved south and Ned had spent a couple days in a displacement shelter before being reunited with his family. They kept in touch and Mr. Stark had flown Ned up for a surprise at the beginning of summer but that’s the last Peter’s seen him.
He goes through the motions of the school day. He knows the first couple days aren’t academic. He’s able to put his head down and be polite only when necessary. Each night he heads back to the house and starts on the evening chores with Jake.
(Enter Peter Parker: desperate for anything that distracts him from the hole in his life)
(Enter Peter Parker: lonely)
On Monday Peter gets a hold of a phone.
One of the kids sitting near him at lunch got up to use the toilet and left his phone unlocked on the table. Peter snags it and slips out of the cafeteria. He’s only memorized two numbers in his life and he can’t call the first. So he types in the second.
“Hello?”
“Happy?”
“Peter? Is that you?”
Peter can’t keep the emotion from his voice. “Yeah. It’s me.”
Happy swears and there’s muffled talking in the background. “Are you okay, Peter? Are you safe? May told us what she did but didn’t tell us where you are.”
Peter presses his palm against his eyes. “Y-Yeah. I’m okay. And safe. I got placed with a nice family. May couldn’t- She couldn’t take care of me anymore.”
“That’s one way to put it, kid.” There’s more muffled talking in the background. “Listen, Pete, we’re working on a lot of things here. I promise. We’re gonna bring yo-”
“Oh, sorry.” Peter bites the inside of his cheek to keep more from spilling. It takes him a moment to compose himself. “I didn’t mean to be a bother. I wanted to ask if you would be able to figure out a way to get my phone back from May but if you’re busy then that’s okay. I can live without it. I just- I just wanted-”
His own tears cut him off. He swipes at them furiously. When did he become so weepy? He’s never been prone to crying like this. Peter just wants to get his phone and Happy still lives in the city. He’d thought that maybe the other man would be willing to get it for him. Jake and Bea’s house couldn’t be too far from the Starks and he could just drop it off sometime for Peter.
Except he’d never considered that Happy could be just as busy as Mr. Stark. Everyone had their own way of surviving and Happy had thrown himself into helping with SI’s displacement shelters. Peter doesn’t know who Happy lost or gained back but he knows how May survived. Happy just told him that he’s working on things. He’s busy.
(Enter Peter Parker: a bother)
“May has your phone? We can get it, kid. I’ll get it for you.” Happy’s voice is hard. Angry. It leaves Peter quaking.
“It’s really okay. I just wanted it to talk to Mr.-” He cuts himself off. “I’m fine without it, Happy. I don’t want to bother you.”
Happy’s voice softens. “You’re not bothering me, Peter. I’ll get your phone.”
“Thank you,” Peter whispers.
“I’ll be seeing you soon, Peter. I promise. Things are gonna work out-”
Peter hangs up on him.
It’s too hard to say goodbye.
It’s then next Monday when there’s a fancy car in Jake and Bea’s driveway.
Peter’s almost to the house when he spots it. It’s not Lizzy Costello’s Prius. It’s not Jake’s truck or Bea’s hatchback. Once he gets close enough, he can read the license plate. STARK15. Happy’s probably here to give him his phone. Hopefully, May still had it.
(He uses the walk to tie up any hopes. He stuffs them down and does his best to ignore them. No matter how much they whisper to him. Happy is here for the phone and that’s the only reason he took time out of his busy life.)
(Could he take you home? Could they want you? Could May change her mind? his hopes whisper.)
(No, no, no Peter answers and this is his survival. This is what it costs him to survive. No, Happy couldn’t take him home. He doesn’t have a home anymore. No, the Starks don’t want him. They have enough to deal with without adding him to the mix. No, May didn’t change her mind. She wouldn’t survive him back in her life. Enter Peter Parker: surviving at the cost of his hopes)
He’s climbing the back steps when he hears it. He’s gotten used to the quiet of the farm. There’s no need to cast his senses around him because there’s nothing around him. Not unless he wants to hear Caster the dairy cow farting in the night. So he rarely purposely tries to sense more than the average person these days.
This isn’t on purpose. His senses lock onto that beat and he’s bursting through the back door. Bea’s sitting at the kitchen table across from Tony Stark. The older man is dressed casually, in a t-shirt and jeans. There’s a suit jacket on the back of his chair. Peter dimly registers Happy and Jake entering the room but his focus is on the man with lightning scars and that uneven heartbeat.
“Peter.” The word is a breath. It’s an ache. It’s a longing.
His hands fly up and he’s pressing his hands against his eyes to hold back the tears. He bends forward, trying to keep himself contained. No one is here for a weepy Peter. No one is here for Peter anyway. He’s got to remember that. May gave him up and no one else has time for him. He presses harder against his eyes.
“Peter.” The word is a warning this time and warm hands land on his shoulders. “Roo, you’re gonna hurt yourself. Hey.”
Peter whimpers and tries to pull away. The warm hands don’t let go. He can feel a breakdown coming. There are sobs in his throat and he remembers the way May looked when she opened her door. Is this how she felt in that moment? He’s got two years in foster care ahead of him and he’s got to survive somehow. He can’t entertain these hopes.
“Peter, please.”
A hand cups his cheek and he jerks away. He remembers the car and May and the hand on his cheek. He remembers the way she left. “She left me.”
“She did.” The warm hand is back, this time at the back of his neck as he’s pulled against a firm chest.
“She gave me up,” Peter whispers.
“I know.” Mr. Stark whispers back.
Peter doesn’t want to find out why they’re here. He doesn’t know if he can survive knowing.
He doesn’t know how long Mr. Stark held him against his chest but once he feels safe enough to take his hands off his eyes, he glances around the room. Jake is standing with Happy near the table. Both of them have concerned looks on their faces. Bea is still seated and she’s watching him.
(She reminds him of how May used to love him and he can’t handle it right now.)
(She reminds him of everything he lost when he came back and he doesn’t know how to survive the weight of that grief.)
(She reminds him of one home and there’s another home standing next to him and both feel too far away.)
He reaches out and takes Mr. Stark’s hand. Ignoring the concerned looks, he leads Mr. Stark to his new bedroom. Mr. Stark sits on the bed as Peter closes the door behind them. There’s a storm rolling in his chest and he can’t hold it off anymore. He sits next to Mr. Stark.
Mr. Stark pulls him against his side again. “Hey, Roo.”
“Did you bring my phone?” Peter murmurs against his chest.
“This old thing?” Mr. Stark shifts and pulls a phone out of his back pocket. “Yeah, I brought it. Figured that you’d be missing it.”
Peter shifts away from the older man long enough to take the phone from him, unlocks it, and pulls up one of his text chats. He doesn’t think as his fingers fly over the keyboard.
PP: i miss you
Mr. Stark’s watch buzzes and he glances at it. Then back down at Peter. “I miss you too, Pete.”
Peter leans against his chest again. “Thanks for bringing my phone. How long are you staying?”
“I don’t know.” Mr. Stark sighs. “It’ll depend.”
Peter knows he shouldn’t be selfish. It’s one of the things May used to complain about. He knows those things stacked up and how much they can weigh. He doesn’t want to be a bother but he asks anyway. “On what?”
(Enter Peter Parker: desperate)
Mr. Stark rests his chin on the top of Peter’s chin. “Well, on how long it takes you to pack.”
Peter cries as he packs.
“I’m sorry about the tears. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” He says as he pulls a few shirts out of the top drawer.
“There’s nothing wrong with you, Peter.” Mr. Stark says softly as he takes the shirts from Peter and puts them into the suitcase Peter left the lake house with two weeks ago.
“There’s lots wrong with me. That’s why May gave me up.” Peter catches sight of the dark look that crosses his mentor’s face and ducks his head. “Sorry.”
“There’s nothing wrong with you. There’s something wrong with May. That’s why she gave you up.” Mr. Stark’s voice is sharp.
His eyes sting. His hands are trembling. “Sorry.”
Mr. Stark’s head snaps up. “Stop apologizing, Peter. You’ve done nothing wrong.”
He presses his palms to his eyes again. “I’m sorry.”
Mr. Stark sighs and pulls him against his chest again. “Me too, Roo. Me too.”
Happy hugs him when he leaves his room.
Peter hasn’t gotten too many hugs from Happy before but he doesn’t complain. The older man’s embrace is warm. It’s safe. It’s something close to normal. When he lets him go, Mr. Stark hands him the suitcase. Happy takes it and something dark crosses his face as he holds it. Then he turns away and mumbles something about the car.
Jake and Bea are standing close to him now. He hates goodbyes but finds that he doesn’t mind this one. “Thank you for taking me in.”
Bea opens her arms and he misses May again as she hugs him. “I’m glad you’re going home, Peter.” She whispers in his ear before she lets him go.
“Sorry we never got you on a horse, son.” Jake shakes his hand.”
Peter smiles. “The Starks don’t live too far away. Maybe I could come visit and you could teach me.”
“Maybe we could come visit.” Mr. Stark wraps an arm around Peter’s shoulders. “He’s got a sister that would go nuts with all these animals.”
Peter mouths the word sister in amazement and lets Mr. Stark guide him to the door.
Once they’re in the car, Peter asks.
“How can you take me home? I thought Jake and Bea were my guardians.”
Mr. Stark threads his fingers through Peter’s. “Once May told me what she’d done, I convinced her to appeal to the courts. Since she was the one to terminate the rights, she had thirty days to appeal. We got the termination of rights appealed and then she signed over her parental rights to Pep and me. Then I came to getcha.”
His vision grows blurry. “Parental rights? Like adoption?”
“Basically, Pete.” Mr. Stark squeezes his hand. “You’re mine now. I hope that’s okay.”
“Yeah,” Peter whispers. “It’s okay.”
He’s tucked onto the couch between the Starks when he remembers the phone calls. Morgan’s been in bed for almost an hour, having worn herself out with her excitement over Peter’s homecoming. He couldn’t believe how easily she’d taken to him as brother.
“Mr. Stark?”
Mr. Stark groans. “No more Mr. Stark, Pete. We’re officially family now. You can call me Tony.”
“Or Dad.” Pepper prompts.
“Or Dad.” Mr. Stark repeats softly.
Peter looks down. “Sorry. I’ll try.”
He doesn’t see the look between the adults above him as they shift nearer to him. Pepper presses a kiss against the top of his head.
“What about the phone calls, Mr. Stark?”
“What phone calls?” Mr. Stark looks down at him.
“The ones with May. She would call you and complain about me.” Peter wants to shrink as he remembers everything she said about him. She’d tried so hard to put up with him.
Mr. Stark’s face hardens. “You know about those?”
Peter nods.
Mr. Stark sighs. “Peter, your aunt and I have been talking for years. We both spent five years mourning you. At first, we would call and talk about you. Eventually, we grew to be better friends and I helped her find her new place and got her a therapist. I wanted to take care of her for you. We would talk and remember you. She always spoke fondly of you.
“I’m not sure what changed but when you came back she was always confused. It was like she was still missing you but you living with her.” Mr. Stark closes his eyes. “I knew she was struggling. She used to tell me how she spent years being mad at Ben because he left her and I think the same thing happened with you.”
“Except I came back.” Peter could hear the whine in his voice.
“She should never have said those things where you could hear them, Peter.” Pepper strokes his back. “Tony would try to help her talk through the things she was upset about but he never agreed with her. You are none of the things she said about you.”
“Exactly right, Mrs. Stark.” The warmth is back in the older man’s voice. “And even if those things were true, Pete, I’d never give you up over them. You could be the most annoying, rude, selfish, stinky, kid in the whole world and I’d never let you go.”
Peter thinks of May. He thinks of tapping on the steering wheel and cupping his face. He thinks of survival and grief. He thinks about tearing apart and coming back. He hadn’t thought that anyone would be able to keep him. He had thought he’d have to survive the next two years. “But why?”
Mr. Stark pulls him against him. “Because I’m a selfish man, Roo.”
(Enter Peter Parker: wanted)
“And you’re my kid.”
-
fin.