Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Junmin opens his locker in a hurry, fingers entering the code quickly. He grabs his stuff, shoves them in his backpack, and slams the thing shut. His shaky hands go to the straps in his shoulders, running his fingers through them as if the texture would calm him down – it doesn’t.

He hates the few minutes he spends in school after class ends. The hallways fill with people, and it’s even worse than early in the morning, because now everyone’s in high spirits, ready to go home. They’re loud and the sound of their combined voices irritates him.

The scene overwhelms him, no matter how many years he had to get used to it. He’s still just as afraid that one of these people will get too close, will bump into him, touch him, as he was when he was a kid. The prospect is enough to make him nauseous.

Junmin starts moving once he realizes he’s been standing in front of his locker like a creep. His eyes look everywhere, taking notice of his surroundings. The few moments in which he distracted himself were enough to clear the hall a little, so it’s not as packed with people. The sight makes him less tense, though not by a lot. His spine is still rigid, but his shoulders go down a fraction.

Though he wants to leave this place as soon as possible, now that he has some breathing room in the increasingly empty hallway, he stops to check the time on his phone. He’s not late, not yet, but he’ll be if he keeps lingering like this.

He keeps walking, staring at the people left in this hell. His eyes halt on that boy with bright green hair Junmin keeps passing by. He’s leaning against what Junmin has taken to assume is his locker, like always. He always stays behind after the bell rings, and Junmin frequently wonders if he’s waiting to be picked up or if he’s staying because of the art club he’s clearly in.

Junmin keeps staring, even though he should be paying attention to where he’s going. It’s a rookie mistake for someone like him, but he still stops looking ahead. There’s a smudge of paint in his hand. No, more than one. A few – five, there’s five. Two yellow, two blue and a green one. He was probably mixing paint. He’s coming back from an art class. Or maybe a free period? Do they even let you go to your club’s room during–

He bumps into someone.

Actually, bumping isn’t the right word. Someone crashes into him.

He doesn’t fall but stumbles back a few steps. His whole body tightens up, a tingling feeling of wrongness crawling up all over him.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” The nagging of wrong, wrong, wrong in his brain drowns out his reasoning, and the words leave Junmin before he can think twice about them.

The boy in front of him doesn’t answer, too busy getting the stuff he dropped. There’s music sheets and what looks like lyrics spread all over the floor, plus a phone. His hair is white. Is he friends with that green guy? He’s in the music club. I’m passing by all kinds of artists today, it seems. His phone screen is not cracked– Good phone case. Maybe I should help him.

Junmin gets down on one knee – because he refuses to put both of his legs on the dirty floor – and starts grabbing the papers.

“Decided to be nice, now?” The guy asks, risking a glance at him, deep voice dripping with sarcasm – but not mocking. He’s not making fun of his apparent mood swing. It’s supposed to be teasy.

“Not nice. Polite,” Junmin corrects. He puts the last of the papers in the pile he’s collected and grabs the boy’s phone to hand it to him. He takes a brief look at the screen and frowns, before giving his things back.

Tricky: Random Chat. It’s a social media app. Never heard of it.

“Thanks.” The boy smiles, a quick, small thing, then leaves. Junmin stands there for a moment, processing what he saw, then his gaze travels to the side. To where the green haired boy was. 

Is. Where he is . Still leaning against his locker, face blank, eyes studying Junmin. They both seem to look away at the same time, the eye contact they make lasting no longer than a few seconds. He looks back at his phone while Junmin looks ahead and resumes walking.

He’s probably late now. Fuck.

[ . . . ]

00:23 A.M.

That’s what the clock reads.

Junmin can’t sleep, which isn’t uncommon for him. His mind is too loud to allow him that luxury.

Staring at the ceiling of his room isn’t helping him gather his thoughts either, only allowing them to further run away from him.

The white paint makes him think of white hair.

White hair. Music sheets. Art. Paint smudges. Green. Art. Phones. App–

App, his mind echoes.

Tricky: Random Chat.

Junmin reaches for his phone under the pillow, where it’s safe. He types in “tricky” in the App Store’s search bar and finds it after a bit of scrolling. His thumb hesitates over the download button, but he clicks it anyway.

It’s just a fun experiment. Nothing is gonna come from this. He can’t get along with anyone anyway–

Welcome to Tricky! Please create an account to start chatting. We advise against using your real name as your username, for your own safety.

“Weird policy, but okay,” Junmin whispers to himself.

Welcome, jmini. You will be randomly inserted in a group chat for now, but you can create your own once you verify your account’s email. Be aware you can only participate in one group chat at once.

Are you ready?

Junmin clicks yes, and the screen starts loading.

jmini has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 2/10

jjjae: oh

jjjae: hi

jmini: hi

jmini: were you lurking ?

jjjae: kinda

jjjae: can’t sleep

jjjae: also i created the gc this afternoon

jjjae: so i was checking my phone like crazy all day to see if someone joined

jmini: even at /checks notes ..00:35am ?

jjjae: maybe

jjjae: very cryptic name you got there

jmini: i don’t want to give personal information to strangers.

jmini: especially random ones i didn’t choose to talk to

jjjae: alright don’t get bitter

jjjae: also youre not sleeping either, j

jjjae: even tho its “/checks notes” 00:36 AM

Junmin frowns at his phone. Hard. He hates this guy already.

jmini: fuck off the checks notes thing is a reference

jmini: don’t put quotes around it like that

jjjae: i’m not making fun of you my god

jjjae: calm down

jjjae: but seriously though why aren’t you sleeping?

jmini: i can’t stop thinking

jjjae: about?

jmini: everything

jmini: my brain doesn’t ever stop

jmini: i’m always thinking

jjjae: that fucking sucks

jjjae: i kinda know how that feels

jjjae: only in my case it’s like my brain produced a little devil

jjjae: that likes to try to convince me everybody hates me and i hate them back

jjjae: he doesn’t really stop, only quiets down sometimes

jmini: can we trade

jmini: you get my ocd inner monologue and i get your demon that tells me things i already know

jjjae: no i think i’m gonna stick to my bpd devil, actually

jmini: fair

jjjae: by the way, speaking from experience

jjjae: everybody doesn’t hate you

jjjae: that’s too many people

jjjae: and even if they do irl

jjjae: i don’t hate you and i’m part of the concept of everybody

jmini: touché

jmini: is that how you even use this.

jmini: is it in the right context

jjjae: i think so yeah

jmini: nice. i like when words work

jjjae: realest

He likes Jae a little, now. He’s nice. More than Junmin is used to.

jjjae: i’m so tired

jjjae: but i can’t catch a wink

jmini: you’re not used to staying up late?

jjjae: oh no i am

jjjae: that’s why i’m tired

jjjae: not because i haven’t slept yet tonight but because i have barely done that in the past three days

jmini: can i ask why

jjjae: yeah

jjjae: so

jmini: why

jjjae: oh you meant that literally

jjjae: anyway so

jjjae: i’m in the music club of my school

jjjae: and there’s not a whole lot of equipment in our room

jjjae: most of it is brought by other students

jjjae: but they do have a bomb mic, better than the one i have at home

jjjae: and i’ve been working on a track with the stuff i have (guitar, keyboard, etc)

jjjae: but i need a mic, and a good one, because the one i have rn SUCKS

jjjae: and the good mic is only available at school. and i’m not fucking bringing all my shit to school for other people to use

jjjae: i bought them with my money i don’t care i’m not bringing or borrowing it

Junmin yawns as he types. The words on the screen start blurring and he has to blink away the haziness.

jmini: which is your right

jmini: since they’re YOUR things

jjjae: then i have to separate my work between beat/vocal

jjjae: i work on the beat at home when i have time then record the vocals at school

jjjae: but we only get like two hours for club activity and i’m not the only person wanting to use the goddamn microphone

jjjae: PLUS if i make any adjustments to the beat in a way that messes with the vocals or whatever i need to rerecord it.

jjjae: so i’ve been living a fucking nightmare where i have to work on my music in the worst way imaginable

jjjae: i finished up what i wanted to do today has been a couple hours but i can’t sleep because i’m too anxious about this whole thing

jjjae: the track is good and i don’t want to give up on it but GOD this is all so annoying

jmini: it definitely sounds discouraging

jmini: i assume you can’t buy a good microphone for yourself?

jjjae: i don’t have that kinda money rn

jjjae: and the school has a booth, which helps A LOT

jmini: i hope you can finish the track soon

jmini: even with all this hindrance

jjjae: sometimes i push through just out of spite

jjjae: spite is always one of my biggest motivators

jmini: it can be a good one

jmini: i think i’m tired enough to sleep

jmini: thanks for the anecdote

jjjae: you’re welcome

jjjae: good night j

jmini: night.

jmini has logged off

jjjae has logged off

Chapter Text

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: i fucking hate everything oh my god

jjjae: i hope everyone in a fucking music club dies

jjjae: fucking

jjjae: bitches

jmini has logged on

jmini: that’s a lot of “fucking”s

jjjae: shut up

jmini: ???

jjjae: i’m not in the mood for joking

jmini: not a joke

jmini: what happened ?

jjjae: i was

jjjae: in the booth trying to record something

jmini: still that track you talked about a few days ago?

jjjae: no i finished that

jjjae: it was just a cover for my yt channel

jjjae: so a bunch of ppl came in

jjjae: some mfs i’ve never seen before in my life

jjjae: i was like ??? cuz what are they doing here

jjjae: turns out they’re from a rival school in the area

jjjae: and someone from my club invited some of THEIR music club in

jmini: why is that a problem

jjjae: first of all because i hate that school i hope it crashes and burns

jjjae: secondly

jjjae: because they were LOUD AS FUCK

jjjae: no one besides that little group was having fun

jjjae: i was in a soundproof booth still catching some of their convo

jjjae: so i just fucking left

jjjae: not a single person could get any work done with the sudden school excursion over there anyway

jmini: feel better now?

jjjae: no

jjjae: what do you mean

jmini: talking about it is supposed to make you feel better

jmini: or something. i don’t practice that so i wouldn’t know

jjjae: oh

jjjae: i mean

jjjae: i’m still mad

jjjae: not as much because i left that shithole already

jjjae: and i’m talking to you

jjjae: j, who’s famously known for not being the person i’m mad at rn

jmini: i don’t think i’m famous for that

susutd has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 3/10

jmini: if anything you’re the famous one

jmini: you have a cover channel

susutd: whos the music major

jjjae: me

jjjae: kind of

jjjae: i’m in the music clob of my hs

susutd: clob

jjjae: leave the chat juseyo.

susutd: i cant i have to look up ur channel first

jjjae: it’s mjverses all lowercase please subscribe i’m almost at 1k subs

susutd has logged off

jjjae: @jmini where you at

jjjae: we know you’re still online

jmini has logged off

jjjae: fuck

susutd has logged on

susutd: ur voice is fire wtf

susutd: i subbed

jjjae: thank you i try

susutd: did i scare off the other guy

jjjae: prob

jjjae: he’s shy

jmini has logged on

jmini: i’m not “shy” shut the fuck up

jjjae: he’s afraid of people*

jmini: i’m gonna rip your vocal cords out

susutd: how is he gonna post his covers then

jmini: he’ll figure something out.

susutd: @jjjae if u learn how to sing without vocal cords hmu i wanna learn too

jjjae: you sing?

susutd: i dabble

susutd: but im better w rap

jjjae: same

jjjae: i have a soundcloud with some stuff i produce

susutd: same²

susutd: i dont produce a lot tho

susutd: i collab w this kid that makes beats for my sc

jjjae: you and j have this ability to sound both 30 and 17 at the same time

susutd: im 71

susutd: 17*

jmini: i’m not thirty

jjjae: that’s exactly what a 71 and a 30 yo would say

jmini: i’m 18

jmini: fuck i’m giving away personal information .

susutd: idk im still 17

susutd: a typo didnt age me 54 years

jjjae: i’m gonna need proof

jjjae: like your sc

susutd: link

jmini: what about me

jjjae: i know you’re just an old soul dw

jmini: ??

jmini: fuck off

jjjae: i’m gonna go stalk susu’s soundcloud

jjjae: brb

jjjae has logged off

susutd: knock urself out

susutd: ill go back to ur channel i only listened to like 30 sec before getting distracted

susutd has logged off

jmini: i’m surrounded by artists these days

jmini: ffs

jmini has logged off

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: it’s a sign you need a hobby

jjjae has logged off

jmini has logged on

jmini: hobbies are for children

jmini: i don’t need one

susutd has logged on

susutd: u need some whimsy and fun in your life

susutd: and u can get that w a hobby

susutd: start singing so we can all collab

susutd has logged off

jmini has logged off

Chapter Text

Yujun fixes the blanket on top of him, tucking himself better and fixing his grip on his bunny plushie. His other hand goes back to scrolling through Instagram, the same bored expression from hours ago painting his face as he watches the posts roll.

He skipped his dance practice today. Again. He has been doing so for the past two weeks, skipping one of the two rehearsals the club has per week because he doesn’t feel up to it. He doesn’t feel up to dancing, to staying later than he needs to in school, to seeing people. He doesn’t feel up to doing anything but laying in bed, rotting, pretending he’s not wasting his life away every time he chooses to hide under his covers instead of actually living.

He buries his face on the plushie, focusing on the soft texture to stop himself from crying. He hates this. He hates how he can’t just be normal, like everyone else. He’s barely functioning as a human being these days, with the way he’s struggling with basic tasks. I’m too useless. The club probably doesn’t even miss me. He’s one of the few there who hasn’t made friends with anyone yet. They hardly talk to him outside of practice. They should be celebrating I’m not there to ruin their choreography–

A tear rolls down his face, followed by multiple others. His pink bunny soaks it up, even as he hiccups against it. Yujun hugs it tighter, knowing it’s the only thing he can trust to not leave him. 

His sobs are loud, even when muffled, but they quiet down with time, until he can only hear his own irregular breathing against the fluffy material. The tears don’t stop falling, though they do so silently now.

Yujun wipes the wetness on his face, hand going over his eyes multiple times until his tear-blurry vision clears. He takes a deep, calming breath – I don’t feel good at all. I don’t want to get up ever again – and grabs his phone where he dropped it on the bed in his rush to hug his bunny. The bright screen contrasts with his dark room so harshly that his eyes burn when he unlocks it.

He starts doomscrolling again, resuming right where he left off: stalking his classmates to see just how much better their lives are, compared to his. Yujun watches stories after stories, addicted to seeing people commemorating everything he doesn’t have. He only pauses when an ad catches his attention, something about a “Tricky: Random Chat”.

Advise against using your real name, inserted randomly into groups, create your own, Yujun reads excerpts.

Should I–

...I don't have anything to lose–

He downloads it while swallowing down some bitterness. I can't even make friends the normal way, I have to trust fate to do it for me. I’m ridiculous.

The opening screen welcomes him as much as it scares him. He reads the base guidelines, finding nothing he hasn't already read in the ad, and creates an account. He sets his username up as “spider2yu”, which – I’m so lame.

spider2yu has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 4/10

The last message – the only one available to him – says “susutd logged off”.

There's no one online. Yujun will have to be the one to start a conversation. Shit.

His shaky fingers hover over the keyboard, but he eventually musters the courage to type something.

spider2yu: hii

Yujun regrets it the moment he hits send. This is all so stupid.

He waits a beat. Then another.

spider2yu: how is everyone doing

Yujun runs a hand through his hair.

He can only wait a bit more before beginning to type again, but–

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: hey

jjjae: i’m fine

jjjae: hbu

spider2yu: i’m good too!

It’s a lie. Such an obvious one for him, but there’s no way a stranger could know that.

The guy doesn’t speak for another minute or so. Yujun feels like he’s intruding somehow, so he doesn’t push.

jjjae: is your username a spiderman refernence?

jjjae: reference

jjjae: i hate spiders please let it be becayse of peter parker or else i’ll quit thi s gc

jjjae: don’t send me a pic of your pet spider

spider2yu: i don’t have a pet spider i swear

spider2yu: it really is bc of spiderman

jjjae: oh ok

jjjae: that’s good

jjjae: sorry i just downed a can of enrhgy drink to study

jjjae: i’mnnot 100% fine

Yujun winces in sympathy. He's stopped feeling jittery with his go-to brand of energy drink a while ago, with how much he's consumed it already to study.

spider2yu: it’s ok

spider2yu: i’ve been there

spider2yu: hope your studying goes well!!

jjjae: i mean

jjjae: i’m not sutdying exactly 

jjjae: more catching up in assignments

jjjae: but ty

The chat is silent for just long enough to make Yujun decide to forget about this and go to bed again. Jae is busy, he’s interrupting–

jjjae: so

jjjae: are you perhaps a college studfent

jjjae: preferably a biology major

spider2yu: oh no

spider2yu: i’m a sophomore in hs

jmini has logged on

jmini: you shouldn’t give away your information so easily

spider2yu: oh

spider2yu: you’re right

Yujun wants to bang his own head against a wall. He should start thinking before he speaks.

spider2yu: i’m sorry :( please don’t use my info for nefarious reasons

jjjae: don’t be

jjjae: he’s just obsessed with internet safrty or something

jmini: it’s common sense

jmini: not an “obsession”

jjjae: ok

jjjae: anway who’s gonna help me with my senior biolgoy homework?

jmini: nobody

jmini: pay attention to your classes

jjjae: nice try but i have adhd

jmini: work around your disorder then

jjjae: work around my disorder.

jjjae: never give advice to anyone ever agizn plss

jmini: what the fuck is agizn

jjjae: oh my fucking god

jjjae: leave me alone

jjjae: stop being a know it all literally nobody likes that

jjjae: it makes you impossible to talk to

jjjae has logged off

jmini: ???

jmini has logged off

spider2yu: please don’t fight

spider2yu: i’m sure jmini was just trying to help!

susutd has logged on

susutd: this is them flirting

susutd: or just jae splitting

susutd: idk the two sound really similar to me

spider2yu: oh

spider2yu: is jae okay??

susutd: if its a split then no

susutd: if it isnt then he will be

susutd: hell let us know which is it either way

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: stop talkng about me behind my back

jjjae: i know you have nothing else going on in your shitty life to talk about

jjjae: but i do’nt jhave anything to do with that so leave me out of it

susutd: be careful w the energy drink

jjjae: i don’t need hepl

jjjae: especialyl not yours

jjjae has logged off

susutd: its a split

susutd has logged off

spider2yu: oh :( 

spider2yu has logged off

Chapter Text

Minjae runs a hand through his hair.

He takes a sip.

Then another.

Then another.

Then another.

By the time he’s finished his can of Red Bull, he already regrets drinking it in the first place.

It makes him irritable, more than ever.

I should’ve done my homework sooner. It’s my fault. I wasted the extension they gave me. The deadline is tomorrow. I’m gonna fail this fucking class.

The caffeine only enhances his stress. He needs the energy boost – especially after three days of relying solely on thirty-minute naps to get him through school, but it doesn’t mean he wants it. He’s agitated, unstable like a rubber band about to snap.

Minjae reads the assignment written in his notebook again and again, each time frustrating him more than the last, because it still doesn’t make sense. Why can’t he get it? The words are right there. He has the study material open on his laptop. It should be easy, I shouldn’t be struggling this much, I’m the problem, I’m always the problem.

He’s angry.

He’s always angry.

If he tries hard enough, Minjae thinks he can feel anger rushing through his veins, mixing with his blood. It’s a constant in his life, something he can never run away from. It’s always there, in the back of his head, waiting to overcome him. 

Everywhere he looks, there’s always reason for anger.

Right now, he’s angry at his stupid assignment . He’s angry at his teacher for wasting his time with it. He’s angry at himself for being a failure. A destructive, mess of a failure, because Minjae is a supernova waiting to happen: there will come a day where he’ll burn out and die, leaving an explosion behind.

His phone pings.

He can recognize a Tricky notification by heart now, so he picks it up to check.

A new person entered the group chat. Minjae replies to their messages with unsteady fingers, then his eyes catch their username.

His pulse quickens, an irrational fear creeping up on him that makes him tremble even more. He types faster, suddenly terrified he’ll be sent a picture of a spider if he takes too long to say anything.

Once spider2yu clarifies they just like Spider-Man, he can breathe again.

They exchange some texts until Minjae remembers he has homework to do.

Minjae stares at the page in front of him and sighs heavily. He tries rereading the questions a few times but promptly gives up, looking back to his phone. Why can’t she get her questions from Google, like every other teacher? What a bitch.

He asks for help in the chat, the only thing he can think to do. He’s almost happy when J logs in, since he’s also a senior and spider2yu can’t help him – what with them being a sophomore and all, but a single message is enough to remind him why they can’t get along sometimes.

“You shouldn’t give away your information so easily”, he reads. God, he’s insufferable.

His attempt to cut J off and change the subject doesn’t work, because J is adamant on getting on his nerves. His anger rises, boils in his veins and threatens to overflow in his mind, but the den only breaks when J tells him to “work around his disorder” , as if it was nothing. As if it was easy. As if Minjae hasn’t lived with this for eighteen years of his life and doesn’t know any better, hasn’t tried yet to do just that.

J is unbearable most of the time. Minjae hates him. Not like I fucking need him as a friend or anything, I’m just doing him a favor by still being around him. He’s the one who needs me and he doesn’t even realize it. Nobody would want to be friends with him. I’m being too nice. He doesn’t deserve my kindness. Fuck this guy.

He closes the app, but the sound of a dozen notifications coming in annoys him enough to make him open it again. He’s greeted by Susu talking shit about him – like I can’t fucking see what he’s saying.

Minjae replies, turns off his phone and throws it on the table, uncaring for how loud it clatters. He tugs a strand of his hair hard enough that his scalp burns, and the sting eases up a bit the knot in his throat. He wants to scream, cry and punch something – preferably J – all at once.

He does none of these things, though. Minjae sits back on his chair, breathing heavily, tired from feeling, from being so utterly consumed by his emotions. He rubs a hand on his face, exhales and blinks.

He grips his pencil, still shaking, and goes back to working on his assignment.

Chapter Text

pkeun has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 5/10

pkeun: heyy

pkeun: small group yall have here

pkeun: what do you do for fun in thjs app

susutd has logged on

susutd: well usually we use the one feature it has

susutd: which is chatting

pkeun: ok snark

pkeun: whatre uou up to

jmini has logged on

jmini: are you having a stroke

pkeun: no why

pkeun: are you worried? 💗

jmini has logged off

pkeun: oh ok

pkeun: anyway

pkeun: so @susutd

susutd: im painting

susutd: hbu

pkeun: nothing much

pkeun: just boredd

pkeun: waiting for my shift to end

pkeun: never in my life have i seen a cafe so EMPTY

pkeun: where are the peopl

susutd: felt

susutd: im waiting for the paint to dry and its being a snoozefest over here

pkeun: if i give you my address will you come give me a tip

pkeun: have the honor of being my third customer of the day

susutd: no

pkeun: 💔

susutd: but ill be cheering for u from inside my house

pkeun: that doesnt mean anything to me

pkeun: i’ll still be bored

susutd: not my problem idk

pkeun: omg fuck you

spider2yu has logged on

spider2yu: susu doesn't mean it like that!!!

spider2yu: he's not saying it to be rude

pkeun: thank you for explaining cutie <33

jmini has logged on

jmini: stop using hearts it's freaking me out

pkeun: no 💗

jmini: .

jmini: @jjjae can you kick someone out from the group ?

jmini: since you created it

pkeun: bitch??? 

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: if i could you wouldnt be here anymore

jjjae: so no unfortunately

jmini: fuck off

jjjae: ❤️

jmini: NOT YOU TOO

pkeun: it's a disease

pkeun: it's spreadifgngnv 

pkeun has logged off

jjjae: the fuck

susutd: hes prob serving a customer

jmini: did he have to shove his phone up his ass to do that

jjjae: LMFAOFKFFNFHXN

jjjae: don't be funny actually it's so weird when you do it

jmini: again, 

jmini: fuck off ???

susutd: i told yall he just needed whimsy in his life

susutd: can u start singing next

jmini: bold of you to say this group chat is the “whimsy and fun” i needed in life

jmini: and no

susutd: u should sing

susutd: i can feel it in my bones

susutd: ur a good singer

spider2yu: j sings??

jmini: no, i don't

jmini: susu’s trying to manifest that into existence because he wants someone to sing for his soundcloud

spider2yu: ohh

spider2yu: doesn't your school have a music club susu?

cunteress has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 6/10

spider2yu: maybe you can find someone there

cunteress: DONT TALK ABOUT SCHOOL CLUBS

jjjae: DON’T TALK ABOUT SCHOOL CLUBS

jjjae: what the fuck

cunteress: hello what

spider2yu: why do you two hate extracurricular activities?? :(

cunteress: my new school doesn't have a dance club

cunteress: which is literally the only thing i wanted to join

jjjae: i’m in the music club

jjjae: and i wouldn't wish that upon my WORST enemy

jjjae: just thinking about it gives me a headache

spider2yu: makes sense

spider2yu: that sucks T~T

spider2yu: why don't you quit? 

jjjae: oh no i would never

jmini: he's in an abusive relationship with the fucking club

jmini: he can't leave

jjjae: shut up

susutd: let him cook

jjjae: DON'T GANG UP ON ME

jjjae: stfu both of you

jjjae: the club gives me access to good equipment i don't have money to buy

spider2yu: ooh

cunteress: been there done that

cunteress: i can't afford a studio or whatever

cunteress: i was depending on the school having somewhere i could rehearse at

pkeun has logged on

pkeun: what abt your house..?

cunteress: can't

pkeun: well you can come to mine at any time

pkeun: i’ll let you rehearse whatever you want

pkeun: ;)

cunteress: maybe i’ll take up that offer

cunteress: ;) 

jmini: .

jmini: never act like this in a public chat ever again

jjjae: hold on there's something in my throat

jjjae: vomit

susutd: vomit

jjjae: ?

jjjae: why am i synching up with people today wth

cunteress: our chakras are aligning

cunteress: it's fate

jmini: how do i stop mine from aligning with everyone else's

pkeun: 💔

pkeun: he hates us

jmini: yeah

jjjae: that's old news

jjjae: boring

pkeun: IM new

pkeun: this is news to me

cunteress: ^^ i second this

jjjae: get on with the program:

jjjae: j hates everyone

jjjae: i hate everyone (currently) (allegedly)

jjjae: susu is fine i guess but just barely 

jjjae: and yuyu shouldn't be here 

spider2yu: why??

pkeun: don't say that about him he's nice

pkeun: ill kill you

jjjae: that's why

jjjae: he's nice

jjjae: we aren't

spider2yu: yes you are

spider2yu: don't say that x2

jmini: i don't like where this conversation is headed

jmini has logged off

susutd: no me neither

susutd has logged off

cunteress: what happened

cunteress: what is this

cunteress: are they allergic to being perceived orr

jjjae: i think so

jjjae has logged off

pkeun: all men are cowards

cunteress: ^^^^^

spider2yu: they don't like when people are nice to them

spider2yu: i guess i don't either

spider2yu: probably because we know we don't deserve it

spider2yu has logged off

pkeun: shit

pkeun: great talk 10/10 wouldn't do it again

cunteress: i feel like someone dropshipped a bomb into the gc

pkeun: LMFAO

pkeun has logged off

cunteress has logged off

Chapter Text

Seeun pushes open the heavy doors of the gymnasium and his eyes sweep over the people inside. His beat up sneakers squeak against the polished floor as he walks, accessing all the little friend groups divided in various corners, as opposed to coming together as the unit they should be. The sight makes him huff in annoyance.

The problem with these people is that they're too arrogant, in his opinion. They think they're above being cordial. They act as if they're better than others – than him – just because they can make friends easily, or whatever. To Seeun, they're just cowards who ignore people they don't know well, who only talk to him about practice and choreographies and the club and nothing else. 

But it's not like he wants to be friends with them, either. He doesn't care. He doesn't.

Seeun catches a glimpse of two other lonely guys, standing far from everyone else just like him. He’s surprised to see one of them, Something-jun, back in practice. The boy missed the last few meetings like it was nothing and suddenly came back like he had any right to. Just seeing him pisses Seeun off. The other one is not much better, with the way he holds himself. You can tell by looking at him that he’s cocky, probably thinks he’s superior to everyone here because he’s a good dancer.

(Not that Seeun has noticed. He hasn’t. He doesn’t pay attention to Yechan, doesn’t hate how he seems to need no one but himself, doesn’t notice how he doesn’t make an effort to talk to anyone beyond necessary, doesn’t wish he could be like him.)

Whatshisface-jun’s twitching forces Seeun’s eyes back on him. He keeps pulling his sleeves down, shifting on his feet and wringing his hands together. He was always a little twitchy, Seeun recalls, but this is something else entirely. The guy looks like he wishes he was anywhere but here, which begs the question of why he came back in the first place.

Anyway, it doesn't matter. Seeun has better things to attend to, like the stretching he's been half-assing for the past minutes as he was people-watching.

He goes through his usual stretching routine, muscles lightening up with the need to move, to dance. Though he may not like the people in Jwapyo High School’s dance club, it's not like he can find anything better – not like I’ll ever get along with anyone. He's used to the environment, and everyone has some skill, at least.

(His mind doesn't go to Whatever-jun, who Seeun has watched in the mirror before, who Seeun has envied once or twice, who Seeun remembers shining brightly on stage, contrasting to his nervous tweaker persona. It also doesn't go to Yechan, who Seeun always watches in the mirror, who Seeun has envied since the boy entered the club, who Seeun knows is the biggest star they have here.)

Once he's done reminiscing– stretching, once he's done stretching, he grabs his phone for a lack of something better to do, someone to talk to. Practice doesn't start for another five minutes and he knows some people like to be late. He opens Tricky more on instinct than anything, checking the new messages on the group. 

pkeun has logged on

jmini: @cunteress what do you want to be called? we can't exactly call you cunt

jmini: i mean we can, but i’d rather not

cunteress: call me hun

Seeun can't resist the teasing, his fingers flying over the keyboard in a rush to type.

pkeun: ??is this flirting

cunteress: NO

cunteress: i’m being serious it's literally part of my name

cunteress: you’ll know for sure when i’m flirting ;)

jmini: STOP

susutd: ur making him homophobic 

susutd: be careful 

jmini: fuck off

susutd: mb forgot ur too gay for that

jmini: oh my god

jmini has logged off

cunteress: he’s always like

cunteress: dramatically leaving 😭

pkeun: RIGHT???

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: it’s his equivalent of a hair flip i think

susutd: be careful²

susutd: hes gonna do good on that promise to rip ur vocal cords out

pkeun: do good on WHAT

cunteress: promise to what again

susutd: /shrugs

pkeun: DON’T JUST SHRUG ??

susutd: gtg

susutd has logged off

jjjae: lmao

jjjae has logged off

cunteress: jae’s lack of fear for his life scares me i think

pkeun: he’s lucky J doesn’t know where he lives

Seeun looks up from his phone when the club’s leader asks everyone to gather around.

pkeun: oop wait

pkeun: gotta go too i have practice

cunteress: NOO NOT THE DANCE PRACTICE

cunteress: DON’T REMIND ME OF DANCING

pkeun: sorryy

pkeun has logged off

[ . . . ]

Jinsik sprays the counter with some water and begins wiping it with a sigh. He really, really didn't want to be working right now, but it's his own fault that he is. His boss asked if he could cover a shift for a coworker who got sick and now he's here, because he can't say no to people. It's not like his boss wouldn't understand if he said no, he knows Jinsik is a high schooler with a shit ton of things to do who can only take three shifts a week – and sometimes manages a weekend – because of that. But he couldn't muster up the courage to deny the man a favour, so now he's here, wasting his afternoon taking care of an empty coffee shop.

He doesn't know how this place hasn't closed yet, with how little movement they've been getting the past few days. Apparently people don't want overpriced bagels and sickly sweet mochas anymore. Unless they go to Jwapyo or Noseon, Jinsik thinks, his wiping getting slower. Everyone and their moms from the two schools within walking distance from the café seem to love the place. He would know, because he had to stutter his way through serving a classmate far too many times. He's coworkers with a fellow Jwapyo High School student, for god’s sake.

His hand holding the rag gets more frantic when Seeun pops up in his thoughts. They're not from the same class so Seeun didn't ring a bell at first, but after seeing him enough times in the coffee shop to have his face memorized, it became easy to spot him in the sea of students. Jinsik has the shift after Seeun’s, so the only time they really see each other is when Seeun is about to leave. It took a while for Jinsik to learn his name, because Seeun is ready to bounce by the time Jinsik arrives, apron and name tag already off. It probably doesn't help that we haven't had a single conversation since we started working together.  

It's not like Jinsik doesn't want to talk to him, it's more like he can't. Seeun is beautiful. He's someone who demands attention when he passes by. He's tall and pretty, with his sharp edges and soft features. He's stylish, he's bold. His hair is dyed a shade of pink that matches him so well Jinsik is half convinced it's his natural hair color. Meanwhile, Jinsik is… well, I’m myself, I guess. Nothing much going on besides that. I’m just the anxious guy who can't say a word to most people, let alone someone like Seeun.

But he doesn't have a crush on Seeun, or anything. It's not like that. He just admires him, is all. 

Admires him a lot.

Maybe too much, given they've never spoken to each other.

…

Shit, I have a crush on him. 

The realization makes his face go up in flames, the red flush staining his ears and going down to his cheeks. He wipes the counter furiously, going back and forth on the same spot as if he can take his embarrassment out on the poor rag he's holding.

God, I’m so stupid.

The bell on the door rings, signaling a new customer, but Jinsik is too busy understanding the secrets of the universe to take notice of it. 

He only catches himself when the person stops in front of the counter, getting his attention with a hesitant, “Hi?”

Jinsik stops his hand immediately, startled out of his stupor. I probably looked insane, fuck. His blush comes back in full force, and he ducks his head half out of embarrassment and half as an apology. “What can I get for you today?” He asks, the words coming out with less struggle than anything else he tries to say out loud, if only because he's said it so many times.

“A Tall Iced Americano with three shots of espresso,” the boy replies, then adds as an afterthought, “please.”

Jinsik types it in with shaky hands. This guy is nothing short of handsome, with his white hair and pouty lips. Jinsik kind of wants to kill himself to avoid this interaction. “What's the name for the order?”

“Uh, it's Minjae,” he says, a hand coming to grip the back of his neck in what Jinsik assumes is awkwardness. He's so glad to not be the only one struggling right now.

He finishes ringing Minjae up, avoiding looking in his direction so he doesn't mess up what he's doing. It almost feels like exposure therapy, having to talk to someone he finds so handsome that they're a little distracting. Maybe he’ll learn something here and finally be able to say “hi” to Seeun.

Also, what's up with pretty people and having dyed hair?

Chapter Text

hyuwu has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 7/10

hyuwu: hello

hyuwu: do you people like photography. or filmmaking

hyuwu: ?

cunteress has logged on

cunteress: oh brother don’t get me STARTED

hyuwu: ?

cunteress: it was a reference

cunteress: anyway yes i like photography

cunteress: kind of??

cunteress: i was into it a few years ago before i got other hobbies

cunteress: i still have an instax wide 300 somewhere if that's worth anything

hyuwu: it's worth everything

hyuwu: i’m stealing it even. wait for me korea is not too far

cunteress: HELLO?? 

cunteress: hilarious thing to say given i’m thai btw

pkeun has logged on

pkeun: YOU'RE THAI???? 

cunteress: gossipy bitch smh..

cunteress: but yeah lol

pkeun: i thought your name was like

pkeun: sehun or something

jmini has logged on

jmini: i’m pretty sure you just like exo

hyuwu: what he said ^

pkeun: shut up that's not true

pkeun: i do love exo

pkeun: ok fine i guess ur right

pkeun: as much as it pains me to agree with j..

jmini: die

hyuwu: argument speedrun any%

pkeun: 😭😭😭

pkeun: mf with uwu on their handle in the big 2025 telling me that

cunteress: CRYINF

hyuwu: IT'S NOT A UWU ? 

pkeun: no i think it is

pkeun: i can see it from my phone it says hyUWU

hyuwu: it wasn't on purpose

hyuwu: i may have to kill myself after this

jmini: how do you accidentally insert “uwu” into your username

hyuwu: my name is hyunu

hyuwu: n = w

hyuwu: hyuwu

jmini: that's unfortunate

pkeun: can we go back to talking about hun being thai

hyuwu: no

hyuwu: i want to keep talking about cameras

hyuwu: and @cunteress’s old instax

hyuwu: which i am stealing. thailand is not too far

cunteress: oh i live in korea actually 

pkeun: ??why

jmini: why

hyuwu: what they said ^

cunteress: i’ve heard traumadumping is not polite sorry yall :/

cunteress: jk but it's a long story

jmini: we got time 

jmini: if you want

cunteress: nah i’m fine

susutd has logged on

susutd: rare j empathy w

jmini: none of these words are in the bible

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: the phrase sounds weird because you told us ONE letter of your name

pkeun: yeah

pkeun: when can we unlock more

jmini: never

jjjae: i’m going to throttle you

jmini: vocal chords

jmini: remember you need them

cunteress: you guys have to explain that properly someday

pkeun: more importantly i need to know

pkeun: why are you always at eo’s throats

susutd: its for show

susutd: im p sure they werent like this before i entered the gc

susutd: got worse as more ppl came in

jmini: what the hell are you talking about

jjjae: you said it yourself

jjjae: you weren't there

jjjae: you don't fucking know that

susutd: lol

susutd: ok

jmini: why do you even care

jjjae: it's seriously none of your business

jjjae: WHY are you meddling

cunteress: okayy

cunteress: let's all calm down

cunteress: and not do whatever this is

jjjae: don't say that like we started shit

susutd has logged off

cunteress: not at all what i’m saying

pkeun: i have since learned to never ask questions ever again. 

pkeun: speaking of where is @spider2yu

pkeun: @hyuwu yuyu is the only human being with a right to use uwu unironically

hyuwu: why does he get a pass

cunteress: you’ll see once you get to know him

spider2yu has logged on

spider2yu: i don't use uwu

pkeun: no but you could

pkeun: that's the point

spider2yu: i don't get it ?-?

hyuwu: ooh 

pkeun: see?? 

spider2yu: ???-??? 

jmini: you usually already use emoticons

jmini: sending “uwu” wouldn't be crossing any lines for you

spider2yu: right

pkeun: anyway where were youu

pkeun: we mustve been blowing up ur phone

spider2yu: my mom came home early

spider2yu: so i left the house to get coffee

spider2yu: and avoid her for a little bit

cunteress: she usually bothers you? 

spider2yu: depends on the day 

spider2yu: i just didn't feel like risking it this time :/

jmini: ^

hyuwu: that's the smallest acknowledgement of kinship i’ve ever seen

hyuwu: you could've just said “felt”

jmini: no

hyuwu: alright

cunteress: j core

cunteress: we love to see it

pkeun: what did u order? @spider2yu

pkeun: i’m something of a coffee conosur

pkeun: connoseor

pkeun: conusuir

pkeun: conassor

jmini: connoisseur.

jmini: he means he's a coffee snob

jmini: which is not true, you just work at a coffee shop

pkeun: BITCH

cunteress: i triple dog dare you to argue with j about that

pkeun: i triple dog deny bye

spider2yu: i got a hazelnut frappe c:

spider2yu: they make it extra sweet here

spider2yu: and it's never crowded

spider2yu: maybe i can show you guys this place someday

pkeun: oh

cunteress: that's so nice :(

hyuwu: can i go to take photos there

jmini: .

jjjae: i know how emotional you are but don’t cry j 😢❤️

jmini: you managed to kill the mood almost instantly

jmini: i need you to die

jjjae: LOLL

spider2yu: i think i understood what susu meant

spider2yu: when he said he couldn't tell flirting from fighting

spider2yu: when it's about 2j

pkeun: CLOCKED BY A CUTIE PATOOTIE

pkeun: now that's embarrassing …

jmini: i’m going to find out where you live

jmini: then doxx you

hyuwu: j be like

hyuwu: wait for me korea is not too far

cunteress: never before have i seen a digital stim until i met hyunu

spider2yu: if you think about it

spider2yu: meme quotes are kinda like digital stims

cunteress: FUCK YOURE RIGHT

jjjae: throwback to when j said he was gonna doxx @pkeun

jjjae: i’m going to your address to burn your house down

pkeun: preferably with my parents inside

jjjae: ofc

jjjae: hopefully with YOU inside too

pkeun: ❤️

pkeun: also wdym throwback that happened a minute ago

jjjae: sorry i shouldn't text while driving

jjjae: especially not with gasoline in my backseat

jjjae: brb

pkeun: i’m gonna wait for you by the door

jjjae has logged off

hyuwu: you people are insane

hyuwu: so glad i’m the normal one here

hyuwu has logged off

cunteress: jae actually left i’m CTFU

cunteress: i gotta bounce too tho

cunteress has logged off

jmini has logged off

pkeun: not even a goodbye from j smh

pkeun: it's just the two of us yuyu

spider2yu: D:

spider2yu: i also have to go

spider2yu: i need to be home soon

spider2yu: we can talk once i get back!! 

pkeun: oh

pkeun: yeah for sure

pkeun has logged off

spider2yu has logged off

Chapter Text

“Do you have anything else you’d like to add to our conversation today?” Dr. Jeon asks and Junghoon twitches with the urge to correct her. It's not a conversation if he’s being forced to be here and participate, to work towards the goal of improving himself.

He swallows down his rebuttal and nods. “I got an ad recently that grabbed my attention. It was for a chatting app.” Dr. Jeon shifts in her seat, crossing her legs, something he has come to deduce means her interest is piqued. “It's basically anonymous. It sorts you into a group chat with a maximum number of people, and you can be sorted again whenever you want. It's still a form of social interaction, I'd just have an easier way out.”

Dr. Jeon stares at him for an unnerving second before humming. “Well, it's certainly a form of connecting with people,” and he knows she's referring to his pending therapy assignment. “But it sounds to me like you're asking for my permission to download this app. Are you?”

“I’m not,” he corrects harshly. “I’m telling you about it because it's easier to rationalize my thoughts out loud.”

“Alright,” she concedes. Junghoon has been here long enough to know that's not all she has to say. “But because this pertains to the assignment I gave you and your overall treatment, I’ll give you some advice. This will be good for you as long as you know when to pull away. Being anonymous means you're in a safer position, yes, but it also makes it easier to forget there's real people talking to you. Part of what constructs communication, our tone, will be lost to you–”

He interrupts, “I can't understand tone in real life. It won't make a difference.”

Used to it, Dr. Jeon barrels on. “Your struggle to understand tone and get it across yourself doesn't stop it from playing a big part in communication, it just means you require accessibility for it. We've discussed this before, I’m sure you remember.”

Junghoon does, and the talk felt like a waste of time. He doesn't need accessibility. He gets himself just fine, he doesn't need to understand someone else or for them to understand him.

“You can ask whoever you're chatting with to use tone tags, and make the effort to do the same. This is not specifically about you or about them, it's about making your conversation easier to navigate. It's going to help both sides.”

He nods, already tired of the subject.

“If you disagree with me, I need you to tell me. I won't be able to know otherwise,” comes the stern reminder. This, too, they've discussed multiple times. Junghoon forgets to verbalize while holding a conversation, too used to being inside his own mind.

“I disagree.”

“Thank you for telling me,” Dr. Jeon replies. The phrase gets on his nerves. It's unnecessary, yet she says it every time. She checks her watch, “We have five more minutes. I’d like to hear why you're against accessibility.” Her lips quirk into in a barely-there smirk. “For yourself, that is.” 

Let the next patient have these five minutes. That’d be an act of kindness, right?

He doesn't roll his eyes but it's a near thing, glancing at the ceiling in a way he knows most people take as an eye roll or some sort of affront. “You want to hear it again?”

Her grin turns sharper. “I’ll hear about it until you change your mind.”

[ . . . ]

Junghoon leans his head on the car window, watching the streets closely. His face is turned away from his mother, even just the sight of her being enough to anger him right now. His nerves are always rubbed raw after therapy, not quite exposed but prodded until he can feel something bubbling under his skin, begging to get out. And it will get out, if he does so much as look at her. 

Of course, she chooses just this moment to speak.

“How was it today?” She asks, her way of trying to pull information from him. Her voice turns a shade resentful when she continues, “You seem angry.”

“I’m not,” he snaps. He's used to this song and dance, but the years of practice go down the drain against his simmering nerves. He can't muster up near enough honesty to placate her when he lies, “Today was good,” but sometimes she's comforted simply by words alone, not needing a matching tone. Junghoon prays it's one of these moments. 

His mom doesn't know this, but therapy doesn't have “good” days. There's indifferent, bad and worse days. Not good. It won't have good days until Junghoon stops feeling like he's being forced to go, and he doesn't think that’ll happen anytime soon.

She doesn't reply for a few seconds, making him turn his attention back to the window. We're almost home. I can get through this without jumping out of a moving car. 

She switches topics and comments with feigned nonchalance, “That flight of stairs always makes my legs hurt,” referring to the one they climb to get to Dr. Jeon’s office. His legs are still spasming from the strain of going down.

He only hums in response. He won't give her the pity she's asking for – and he's not even sure if she's telling the truth in the first place.

“Maybe I’ll get that cane for myself too,” she jokes, and the thin thread holding his patience together finally snaps. 

He pulls away from the window and turns to her, eyebrows frowning in outrage. “You didn't even buy mine when I asked you to.”

She spares him a glance and sighs. “We need to schedule an appointment with your doctor to get your diagnosis, then–”

“I don't need a diagnosis to buy a walking aid! And that doctor doesn't know shit–”

“He's been following your case since the beginning, it's important to get his opinion!”

“I don't care about his opinion! My legs were hurting so much I couldn't even walk, and all he did was dismiss me after saying some bullshit about a disease I don't even have! He didn't even bother to write an official diagnosis for that, either!”

His ears are ringing with the sound of his own yells. He takes a deep breath, remembering this discussion won't go anywhere. She doesn't understand him and never will. 

“You could order my walking aid off the internet. It's cheaper and I won't need a diagnosis for that.”

His mom sighs again, heavier this time. He averts his eyes so he can't see her expression, though he can guess what's written on it. “Junghoon, do not talk to me like that ever again. I’m your mother, not your friend. I won't accept that tone with me, am I understood?”

“Yes.” The word leaves him forcefully, ripping the insides of his throat on its way out. When he swallows, he can almost taste the blood it left behind.

[ . . . ]

Junghoon is sitting on his bed, ice packs over both his thighs to help with the pain, when he finally downloads Tricky . Picking a username with the semi-anonymous policy they have is easy, because his favorite color is always on the tip of his tongue, humming at the back of his mind. His world is mint, so he has no hesitation in his fingers when he types “minthoon” and presses send.

He takes one of the ice packs away and pokes his skin while waiting for the screen to load. Not numb enough, he thinks, then puts it back.

minthoon has joined Group Chat #X03KS30

Capacity: 8/10

minthoon: hi. 

It takes a few boring minutes for someone to reply, which Junghoon spends scrolling through another app.

hyuwu has logged on

hyuwu: hey

The response can only strike a single thought in his mind: That's a stupid username. 

hyuwu: been chewing a lot of mentos these days? 

minthoon: ?

minthoon: no

hyuwu: that was a joke

hyuwu: because of the ‘mint’ in your handle

A voice that sounds a lot like Dr. Jeon repeats back to him a faint “You could make use of tone tags” . He promptly ignores it. 

hyuwu: ok that didn't land well

minthoon: mint is my favorite color

hyuwu: nice

hyuwu: mine is blue

Junghoon blinks at the screen, wondering what to say next. This is tedious. I don't want to talk to people. Fuck Dr. Jeon’s assignment.

pkeun has logged on

cunteress has logged on

pkeun: this is the worst conversation i’ve ever seen

pkeun: are we in kindergarten why are we exchanging fav colors

cunteress: i wouldn't say all that

cunteress: what i would say is that hyunu can't hold a conversation alone to save his life

pkeun: wait this is so romantic

pkeun: we logged at the same time

pkeun: * bats my eyelashes *

cunteress: aww

hyuwu: @cunteress consider the following:

hyuwu: death

cunteress: been there tried that loll no thanjs

pkeun: what

hyuwu: what

cunteress: what

cunteress has logged off

pkeun: no come back

pkeun: hun what the fuck

minthoon: terrible way to admit to a suicide attempt

pkeun: no shit

cunteress has logged on

cunteress: ok it was like years ago

cunteress: can we not talk about it

pkeun: i mean if that's what you want? 

hyuwu: ^

cunteress: okay thank you

cunteress has logged off

hyuwu: moving on in behalf of hun

hyuwu: @minthoon do you like photography? 

pkeun: STOP

pkeun: you can't say this to every single person you come across

pkeun: it's NOT a good opening

hyuwu: it's perfect to me idk what you're talking about

minthoon: i don't

minthoon: not a fan of extracurricular activities

hyuwu: how do you know. 

hyuwu: how do you know it's my extracurricular activity

minthoon: it's easy to guess

minthoon: photography is an expensive hobby and you type like a teenager

minthoon: if you're still in school, you have no significant source of income

minthoon: therefore can't engage in your pastime unless it's being funded by something, which i’d take  is your school

pkeun: my anxiety swears it's thinking this far ahead when it's making me worry for no reason

hyuwu: ^

hyuwu: i feel like john watson in s1e1 of sherlock where they're in that cab and he's amazed by sherlock’s skills

Junghoon’s eyes widen a fraction at the reference to a show he likes.

pkeun: omg you get more cringe by the second

pkeun: sherlock bbc reference in 2025

hyuwu: is that all you have to say to me

hyuwu: that i’m being cringe “in the big 2025”

minthoon: i like sherlock

hyuwu: sherlock fandom mentioned

pkeun: oh my god

pkeun: hyunu’s a watson kinnie and you're a holmes kinnie

pkeun: this is a match made in hell

hyuwu: @pkeun consider the following:

minthoon: death

His fingers hurried to type before Hyunu could say anything else. It's the first time in a long while where he's been excited to talk . The feeling is odd, new , but not unwelcome.

Junghoon sits back on his pillow, putting the ice packs in his bedside table and tucking his legs into a comfortable position with some difficulty. He fixes his grip on his phone and glances back at the screen.

pkeun: what js this

pkeun: are you soulmates

hyuwu: yes

hyuwu: i created our soulbond the moment he said he liked sherlock

minthoon: i thought it was when i told @pkeun to die a second ago

hyuwu: no that was just what officiated the bond

pkeun: alright pack it up

pkeun: don't exclude me

susutd has logged on

susutd: being soulbound out of hatred for eun is 2j core

jjjae has logged on

jjjae: can we address how and why we have a ship name

susutd: thats on @spider2yu

spider2yu has logged on

spider2yu: it's easier to type :p

jmini has logged on

jmini: you can't hide behind emoticons forever

jmini: you know exactly what you're doing

spider2yu: :P

cunteress has logged on

cunteress: malicious yuyu is diabolical

spider2yu: :PP

pkeun: stop this is disturbing to me💔💔

pkeun: be cute

hyuwu: ^^

spider2yu: :3

susutd: now do a flip

cunteress: 😭😭??

susutd: thought we were telling him what to do

susutd: can u flip

spider2yu: i can!! 

spider2yu: hun cover your years

cunteress: cover my what

minthoon: ears

jmini: he means ears

spider2yu: yes

cunteress: they're covered¿¿¿

spider2yu: @susutd i’m a dancer

cunteress: NOOO

pkeun: LMFAO

pkeun: shouldn't it be “cover your eyes” baby? 

spider2yu: oh right o.O

cunteress: it's too late i took psychic damage

cunteress: i’m dying

pkeun: NO

pkeun: you're fine

pkeun: tell me you're fine

cunteress: yeah i was joking

cunteress: are YOU fine? 

susutd: guess

jjjae: susu

susutd: mb

pkeun: iam

pkeun: normal

cunteress: you don't sound the part

spider2yu: eun

spider2yu: are you sure you're ok? 

pkeun: no i am

pkeun: swear

spider2yu: i think you should log off for a sec :(

spider2yu: to drink some water and eat if you can

pkeun: why

cunteress: bc we're asking

cunteress: and we're worried

pkeun: ok

spider2yu: we’ll be here when u come back!! ❤️

pkeun has logged off

cunteress: is it because of what i said earlier

jjjae: could be

jjjae: but it's quite literally not your fault either way

jmini: refrain from joking about that around him

jmini: it may be easier to talk about it if you don't acknowledge it in a serious manner

jmini: but it's still a serious topic, a heavy one at that

jmini: especially for people who care about you

cunteress: okay

cunteress: yeah

cunteress: sorry i keep saying shit without thinking it through

hyuwu: it's not your fault

spider2yu: hunnie

spider2yu: if eun got upset that's just because he loves you

spider2yu: don't blame yourself

cunteress: you can't tell me these things while sounding like you do in my head

cunteress: you're an animal crossing character to me

cunteress: animal crossing doesn't make you sad

spider2yu: i don't sound like an animal crossing chara irl >n>

hyuwu: i would bet you do

susutd: not even just the voice

susutd: u look like one

jjjae: can you feel it in your bones?

susutd: yeah

jjjae: it's over yuyu

jjjae: you look like one fr then

jmini: susu’s bones are awful indicators of truth

susutd: im gonna put u in a studio

jmini: is that a threat

susutd: could be

cunteress: horny jail

jmini: what

cunteress: 💞

cunteress has logged off

jmini: and i’m the one who makes dramatic exits

jmini: right

jmini has logged off

jjjae: HE JUST DID ONE

hyuwu: he's incapable of self awareness

spider2yu: j is just a little clueless

minthoon: he lacks self awareness. 

hyuwu: see

hyuwu: hoon agrees with me

jjjae: you're soulbound that doesn't count

jjjae: no wait why am i being against j slander

susutd: lol

jjjae: susu.

susutd has logged off

spider2yu: j and susu are total opposites

spider2yu: susu is too aware D:

hyuwu: it scares me sometimes

jjjae: don't encourage him

minthoon: afraid you're going to be read again?

jjjae: oh my GODDD

jjjae: can't have shit in ohio

jjjae has logged off

spider2yu: ?-? 

spider2yu: i thought he was korean.. 

hyuwu: yuyu

hyuwu: please never change

spider2yu: okay :) 

spider2yu has logged off

hyuwu: so @minthoon

hyuwu: do you like photography?

minthoon has logged off

hyuwu: WAIT

hyuwu: what's your favorite sherlock episode

minthoon has logged on

minthoon: a study in pink

minthoon has logged off

hyuwu: fair

hyuwu has logged off