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Chapter Text

“Hey, miss? Are you alright?” 

A voice entered Anna’s ears as she opened her eyes, her head pounding like anything. As she awoke, the woman looked up to see a small man looking down at her, concerned. She jumped, not expecting to see anyone, let alone a sweet-looking man with blonde hair, a moustache, and a silver hat with wings. She carefully sat up. 

“Er…huh?” was all Anna could muster.

“Hey, hey, easy, easy…” the man helped her up and rubbed her back, noticing she was in pain. “It looked like a rather nasty fall you took.”

“Fall?” she frowned, confused. “What are you talking about?”

“We saw you fall! From the sky!”

Anna took a minute to think, to try her hardest to remember what happened to her. A flash of light, the feeling of force against her…then nothing. “Did I?”

“Yes! Gosh, you must have had a nasty fall there, let me help you up.” The man got Anna to her feet and brushed off the dust from her blue dress.

“Oh, thank you.” she smiled, appreciating the kindness of this man, though noticing how he came up to her waist. Still, she liked that he went out of his way to help her. “You’re very nice.”

“Just Gaulish hospitality.” he nodded. “The name’s Asterix.” he held out her hand to her.

She smiled and took it, shaking it gently. “Anna. Anna Stevens.”

“Ah, you can at least remember your name. That’s a good start.” he chuckled, a cheeky little chuckle that she took to instantly and joined in with.

“I suppose so.” she looked around. “So…where am I?”

“Well, you’re just outside the village.” he pointed in the direction of a tall wooden fence surrounding many huts. “We’re one of the last holdouts against the Roman Empire here in Gaul. You’re welcome to stay here so you can rest up.”

“Gaul?” Things were very weird to her as she scratched her head. “Where’s that?”

“Oh, according to Getafix, we’re just south of Britannia, north of Iberia..”

She frowned as she tried to think where the hell she could be. This certainly wasn’t like her home…but where even was her home? She tried to take a step forward but stumbled a little, thankfully Asterix caught her. 

“Woah, steady!” he sighed. “Just hang on to me, alright? My hut isn’t too far. Come on.” He got her arm around him as he helped her into the village. “Just put your weight on me, it’ll be alright.”

“Thank you.” she spoke softly as she did as asked and walked with him.

As Asterix helped her into the village, Anna noticed how everyone living there stopped what they were doing to look her way. She immediately felt a pit in her stomach, hating the idea of being the centre of attention in any way, even with the warrior’s kindness and care for her, a stranger to this village.

“Everyone’s staring…” she whispered to him, nervous.”

“Yeah, they do that.” he smirked. “The village likes two things: gossip and fights. Sometimes with each other, sometimes with the Romans. Depends on the day.”

She giggled, appreciating his humour. “Ah, so a typical group of villagers.”

“Exactly!” he smiled, helping her into his hut and onto his bed. “Now, just rest up, ok? I have a few errands to run, but I’ll come back with some roast boar for you, and we’ll have our village druid, Getafix, look at you, that alright, Anna?”

She smiled and nodded. “Yes, thank you. That’s really kind of you.”

Asterix looked back at her before he left, then exited the hut, leaving Anna to lie on the bed alone with her thoughts. She closed her eyes and tried to think about what happened, how she ended up here, and even who she was. Yes, let’s start with that, she thought. 

Her name was Anna Stevens, she was 28 years old, she loved reading, history, and cooking, and her birthday’s 18th November 1996. Wait, 1996? This certainly didn’t look like her regular life. No…it looked older. Norman? Saxon? Hang on, didn’t Asterix say something about the Romans? Had to be earlier. How early? Gods, she felt so discombobulated. Where even was she? Gaul? Everything felt so confusing, how did she even get here? She sighed as she closed her eyes. Thinking was too much, she felt so tired, so exhausted from everything that happened. After a few minutes, she fell asleep, finally getting the rest she deserved.

After a few hours, Anna woke to find something licking her hand. Groggily opening her eyes, she found a small dog of black and white fur looking up at her sweetly.

“Hey little one…” she smiled softly at the pup who looked up happily. As she petted the dog, she heard voices in the other room of the hut, noticing one was Asterix’s, but she didn’t know the second voice. She picked up the dog to listen to the conversation, not knowing if it would be rude to interrupt.

“Oh sure, Mr Asterix can do whatever, pick up a woman that fell out of the sky when his old pal was busy chasing all the boar.” The other man shouted angrily.

“Well, maybe if Mr Obelix thought more with his head instead of his stomach, perhaps he would show a little compassion for a hurt woman!” she heard Asterix snap back at this Obelix.

“Oh of course Mr Asterix pulls the compassion card! Use it when a woman falls from the sky, but not when his friend needs assistance with catching wild boar!”

“If Mr Obelix used his brain, he’d know that there are always boar to catch! They’re not going to go extinct whilst my attention isn't on them for 5 minutes.”

“You never know, they could!

Anna bit her lip whilst she overheard the argument. As she held the dog, she moved into the other room to see Obelix as a larger man with red hair and blue and white breeches. She cleared her throat so the men would stop arguing and notice her. It worked. “Hi, is this dog yours?” she smiled as she held him up to Obelix just as the pup began to lick her cheek.

He nodded a little surprised. “Yeah, he is. Dogmatix, here boy!” The dog lept out of Anna’s arms and ran to the larger man, as the two Gauls calmed their tempers now the woman was present in the room with them. “He’s not usually affectionate to other people, especially not to other women.”

She shrugged. “I do love dogs.” Anna then bit her lip. “Um, I’m Anna. I hope I’m not a bother at all.”

Obelix’s weakness to women resurfaced as he found it difficult to talk to Anna. “I-um…no, it’s no trouble, no trouble at all.”

Asterix chuckled. “You’ll have to forgive my friend, Obelix, here. The best woman he can speak to is his mother.”

Obelix glared at his friend, but Anna giggled. “No, I get that. Sometimes it’s hard to talk to people. I’m often bad with new people. Though it helped that you had Dogmatix with you. Dogs make everything better.” 

The larger man chuckled and nodded. “That-that is true, yeah.”

“I’ll start on the boar.” the smaller man nodded as he turned to the fire and prepared a roast boar. 

Anna headed over. “Can I help at all?”

“No no, it’s all ok.” Asterix smiled, evident that he felt a connection with this new woman.

She nodded, backing away and smiling. “Ah, all good. Don’t disturb the chef.”

“Ah! She learns quick!” Obelix chimed in, to which they all laughed. 

The three, well four including Dogmatix, all enjoyed each other’s company as they waited for the boars to cook. Once ready, they tucked into the meal together and shared the meal. 

Then Obelix asked “So is it true? Did you fall from the sky?”

“Obelix!” His friend sharply glared from across the table. 

Anna looked confused as she shook her head. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Well, Asterix said that he saw you fall from the sky.” The larger man explained. “The only thing any of us are afraid of is the sky falling on our heads. Now, you’ve actually fallen out of the sky, I would think it’s something to take into account.”

Anna just looked at the smaller man, who just shrugged. “Don’t look at me!” he responded with a smirk. “This is one of the few times he has made sense discussing something other than food!”

The woman giggled and looked at the first man. “Well, I don’t exactly remember. I do know I didn’t originally begin in the sky. All I know was I was walking somewhere, a flash…then that’s it.” she sighed as she ate more of her roast boar.

“Well, where did you come from?” he asked.

“Obelix!” Asterix looked mortified at his friend’s line of questioning but the woman just giggled.

“It’s ok, it’s ok. Um…” she pondered, trying to remember. However, her mind is still a blur and thinking felt foggy. She knew there were people in her past, where she was from… but where? “I think…what you call Britannia? I’m not sure.”

“Oh? Maybe the Romans put you in a trebuchet and flung her over to Armorica?” The redhead asked, very curious about this newcomer to the village.

“If that happened, she wouldn’t be alive!” the blonde man facepalmed himself, getting frustrated with his friend’s innocent yet naive questions.

Anna shook her head. “No…I’d probably remember better if Romans put me in some catapult and flew me from one country to another.” she chuckled. “No…maybe it’ll come to me soon enough.”

“Well, you’re welcome to stay with me.” Asterix smiled, but then realised how his words sounded and began to feel embarrassed. “I mean, until you have your own hut. Or you could stay with the other villagers that you’re more comfortable with…”

She smiled and shook her head. “No, no, I appreciate the hospitality. Thank you. I’ll happily take you up on it. As long as that’s ok.”

“Of course it’s fine. I-I’m glad.” he chuckled in relief as the two caught each other’s eyes, holding their gaze longer than intended. Obelix, feeling awkward, passed the bones from his roast boar to Dogmatix, who was waiting expectantly on the floor. The pup delighted in chewing the bones as his tale wagged, not noticing how two of the humans were beginning to feel attraction to one another. 

After realising his best friend was still there, Asterix cleared his throat as he tried to shake the haze Anna brought on him. “Ah, yes…first order of business, make sure the chief gives you permission to stay.”

“Permission?” she tilted her head.

“It’s just procedure.” he shrugged. “So Roman spies don’t come in under our noses.”

Obelix nodded as he added “Cacofonix might call us barbarians, but we do have order amongst our chaos.”

“Who?” the woman asked.

“Oh, we’ll introduce you.” Asterix smiled as he beckoned her to follow out of the hut and to the chief’s hut, with Dogmatix and his owner following behind. As they all walked together, he pointed out the different members of the village. As well as the bard, Cacofonix, he also showed her Fulliautomatix, the blacksmith, and Mrs Fullyautomatix, Unhygenix, the fishmonger, and his wife Bacteria, Geriatrix and Mrs Geriatrix, and Impedimenta, the chief’s wife. Soon, they got to Cheif Vitalstatistix’s hut, carefully entering. He bowed politely. “Chief. I request that we take in this woman, Anna, as a guest to our village. She is a long way from home and lost her memory.”

The Chief pondered, then looked at her. “Anna, firstly, welcome to the village. We would happily take you in for the time being until you recover from your memory loss.”

She smiled and bowed her head. “Thank you. It really does mean a lot.” Then, a horn sounded outside. “What’s that?”

Asterix smiled. “Time for our ration of the potion.”

The woman frowned. “Potion?”

Obelix beamed mischievously, clapping gleefully. “It’s time to have some fun with the Romans, by Toutatis.”

Chapter Text

The whole village descended to a hut almost hidden and out of the way in the layout. Anna, confused and nervous, stayed close to Asterix as she trusted him the most. Everyone formed a queue outside this hut as an old man, looking like a wizard or druid, brought out a cauldron full of a liquid. “Asterix, what’s happening?” she asked innocently, very perplexed.

“Oh, our ration.” he replied with a smile. Seeing her blank stare, he realised he needed to deliver more context whilst avoiding spilling all the secrets. “Ah, to put it simply, our druid supplies us with a…pick me up of sorts. Helps us defend against the Roman invaders.”

“Ah, ok.” she nodded. “Like a magic potion?”

He blinked, stunned at how quickly she caught on. “I-yes! Exactly like that. Wow, you catch on quick!”

“Not just a pretty face.” she smirked.

“No no, I can definitely see.” replied Asterix, then he realised what he said. “Ah-well-what I meant was…that is, what I meant to say…”

Thankfully his flustered fumbling was interrupted by the druid, Getafix, chastising Obelix when the larger Gaul got to the front of the queue. “Obelix, how many times must I tell you?! No! You know very well you cannot have any of the potion, yet you insist on this every single week!”

Obelix huffed. “Well how else am I meant to taste what smells delicious? If I just have a little–”

“No!” Getafix yelled sternly as he whacked the other Gaul’s hand with the ladle.

“Ow!” he yelped in pain. “See! You caused me pain! It’s obvious I’m now weak!”

“Strength does not mean impervious to pain, Obelix, now go!” the druid huffed as the other Gaul moped away.

“Just because I fell in when I was a baby and it’s now permanent shouldn’t mean I can’t taste even a little.” he whined as he walked away.

Asterix giggled as Anna looked at him quizzically. “What was that about?” she asked.

“Oh, just Obelix being Obelix.” he smiled. “He’s desperate to taste the magic potion, even though he’s not allowed.”

“Why? What would happen if Obelix had the potion?”

He turned to her, face fallen, and just shook his head. “You don’t want to know.”

“Oh.” she bit her lip, a little stunned at the response to the question. “Well…what does it taste like?”

“Lobster.”

“Lobster?! Why?”

“For flavour. It’s one of the ingredients Getafix has divulged to us. That and mistletoe. Other ingredients are a secret only to druids.”

“Ah. Understandable.” she shrugged. The small warrior was surprised at how understanding and easygoing this woman was to everything she was introduced to. It was…intriguing. In a good way, of course, but still…this woman…

Once all the villagers, except the women, Obelix, and Anna, took the potion, she looked to Asterix and tilted her head. “So, you said that this potion helps fend off Roman invaders. How?”

“Simple. We go to one of the four camps that surround the village and…give them a little reminder that they shouldn’t mess with us.”

“Oh, you beat the crap out of them!”

“Precisely”

“Impressive.” 

Asterix chuckled at Anna’s compliment, blushing slightly. “You think so?”

“I know so.” she smirked, her cheeks turning a similar colour to his. As another horn sounded, she knew that the men had to be off to fight the Romans. The woman sighed. “Do you really have to go?”

“Eh, we won’t be long, promise.” he smirked. “You needn’t worry, we’ll be back before you can say Centurion.”

“Come on Asterix!” Obelix jogged by, practically bouncing in glee. “10 sestertii I’ll get more helmets than you!”

“Oh you’re on!” he beamed. The warrior waved at Anna as he ran with the other men whilst she just watched on.

“Centurion…” she whispered, very nervous, as he and the male members of the village disappeared into the forest. She turned and saw some of the women look at her, causing her to jump. “Oh…hi…”

“Come with us, dear.” A small woman beckoned her to follow. “This is what we get up to while the boys are away.

For about half an hour, Anna spent time with the other women of the village;  namely Impedimenta, the Chief’s wife, Bacteria, wife of the fishmonger, Mrs Fulliautomatix, the wife of the blacksmith, and Mrs Geriatrix, wife of the village elder. They mostly sipped hot water, shared gossip, or worked on mending. Anna bounced her leg impatiently. Sitting around and just…waiting? This was very unlike her. She didn’t like the fact that men were fighting Romans, protecting the village, and they were just doing…nothing. 

“So…” Anna blinked, biting her lip. “we’re not joining the fight? Helping defend our home?”

“Oh no, deary, no!” Mrs Fulliautomatix shook her head, almost shocked. “Anna, women don’t go into battle unless absolutely necessary and alongside their husbands.”

“But why?” the Briton woman frowned, confused. 

“It’s simply not done.” Bacteria shook her head.

“Besides, fighting would lead to messing up your clothes and your hair, we certainly can’t have that.” Mrs Geriatrix stated firmly as she fixed her updo, making sure it was perfect.

Anna slumped in her chair. It wasn’t that she needed to fight. In all honesty, she didn’t really know how to, and probably wouldn’t be any help. Still, she didn’t like the idea that they were doing this incredibly brave action of fighting to protect everyone from the invading Romans, and she was sitting around doing nothing. It frustrated her. 

“So, Anna,” Impedimenta spoke and broke the new arrival out of her thoughts. “what do you do in your spare time?”

“Um…” she bit her lip as she thought. “I like to read.” 

All the women blinked in surprise. “You…can read?” asked Mrs Fulliautomatix.

“Of course…” Anna shrugged, though noticed the other women’s surprise. “can’t everyone?”

Bacteria looked concerned. “No woman is allowed an education.”

“So none of you can read?” she blinked, stunned. 

“Our husbands can.” Impedimenta shrugged. “They can read for us.”

“Oh.” the Briton simply stated and bit her lip. Thankfully, the men returning from the fight interrupted the awkward nature that was creeping into the conversation. Everyone stood up to meet them outside as they came through the gates.

Anna smiled as soon as she saw Asterix, seeing he was back safe and carrying several helmets with Obelix, arguing with his friend. “That last punch you did still only counts as one!”

“Does not!” retorted the larger friend. “That’s not fair! If those 5 counted as 5 individuals, that would take me one over yours.”

“You only punched one of them, it’s still one.” the shorter man persisted. “It was just by chance those 4 happened to be behind that legionnaire.”

She giggled as she approached them. “I see you’re discussing important details of the battle.”

Asterix almost fumbled with the helmets in his arms when he saw her. “A-Anna! Hi…”

“Hey Anna.” Obelix greeted politely. “Keeping busy whilst we had fun with the Romans?”

“Oh, just speaking with the women of the village, introducing myself to them.” she shrugged. “I swear, at some point, it’ll become a regular thing. Like an institute of women or something…”

“That sounds like a crazy idea, in all honesty.” he replied, chucking, as his shorter friend was struggling with what to say to her.

She picked this up. “Asterix, is everything alright?”

“Yeah, no…all fine.” he sheepishly chuckled. “Listen, because of our success against the Romans, the village is to have a large feast tonight. There’ll be singing, dancing, food, and…” he stopped himself as butterflies entered his stomach, but persevered. “Maybe perhaps…you would like to sit next to me?”

She softened as her cheeks turned pink once more, smiling fondly at the small Gaul. “I would like that. A lot.” She nodded. “I’ll be back at the hut when you’re done with the helmets.”

At that, Anna waved the two best friends and headed back to the hut as Asterix looked on and sighed, captivated by the new woman of the village. Then he was snapped out of his haze as he heard his friend chuckling. “What?!” he snapped.

Obelix couldn’t hold it in any longer as he rolled on the floor in hysterical laughter. “Shoe’s finally on the other foot!” he cackled, as Dogmatix tilted his head to look at his owner. For those eagle-eyed, they would notice the dog using his ear to tap the side of his temple, as if thinking “These Gauls are crazy.”

The blonde man sputtered “I-what?! What are you even talking about?!”

“You! You really like Anna!” the redhead laughed even more.

“What?! No! I-I only just met her, things like that just don’t happen.”

“Oh sure, but when it happens to me–”

“Well here’s the thing, Obelix, I’m not you!” Asterix snapped back. “I don’t instantly fall in love with the first woman I see!”

“Oh, I think she’s a special case.” Getafix chuckled as he approached the two.

“Oh, not you too druid!” the small warrior groaned as he saw the third man join the conversation. 

“You must be honest with yourself, Asterix.” the older man shrugged. “There will be times where, despite your mockery of Obelix’s ever-fluttering heart, you yourself are not immune to attraction when it comes your way.”

“Oh come on.” He huffed. “Like I said, we only met her today, there’s no way I could just fall for someone without knowing if, for example, she enjoys cooking! Or, or, if she likes stories! Oh, hell, if she can sing!”

Then, a soft voice came from Asterix’s hut as the sound of Anna’s voice made its way out of the home and into the ears of the villagers, stunned. It wasn’t the best voice, it could be a lot stronger, but it was soft and sweet, an innocent singing voice that could be better with more practice. He stopped his rant as he looked at the hut, as if entranced by the song and voice from the woman staying in his home, her voice like a siren’s call. He looked on, blinking in amazement, as he took in her voice and smiled at the melody she created.

Getafix chuckled at this, amused that this stubborn brave friend of his was so enamoured by the new arrival to the village and refused to admit it. He watched the smaller Gaul look at the hut, transfixed by the angelically soft voice. “You were saying, Asterix?”

The warrior shook his head, trying to get out of this haze of infatuation Anna brought to him. “Well, I-I didn’t know that…that her voice sounded like that.”

“I know, awful!” Cacofonix huffed behind the three, indignantly. “It’s evident that woman wouldn’t know a musical idea if it hit her in the face!” he tossed his hair and sauntered off.

For the first time, Asterix felt like he wanted to punch the bard for even daring to critique the woman’s vocals that captivated him so. Then, he took a deep breath and composed himself. No, that irrational thinking was ridiculous. He shouldn’t want to protect Anna so quickly, Cacofonix can have his opinion. And yet…he already felt like he wanted to protect her, defend her. But that just seemed silly.

He couldn’t have already fallen for someone already, could he?

Chapter Text

Night fell and the village was set for their delicious victory feast after their fight with the Romans. Roast boar, cooked to the finest over a roaring warm fire delighted the tastebuds of the villagers celebrating. Well, all except one, as Anna looked up at Cacofonix, tied up and gagged as the bard hung from a tree by his waist. As she found her seat next to Asterix, she turned to him, a lot of questions in her mind.

“So…” she began as she pointed to the man in the air. “what’s that all about?”

“Oh, Cacofonix can’t sing.” Asterix shook his head as he poured her wine for her. “Well, he can, just…not well.”

“His singing causes it to rain.” Obelix put bluntly as he stuffed his face with one of the roast boars.

The smaller warrior rolled his eyes. “Yes, what Obelix said. Whenever he sings, it rains, even indoors!”

“Oh.” she blinked, stunned by this information. Anywhere else, she probably would find this too difficult to believe. But now, considering that so far, she has been transported somewhere, forgotten where she’s come from, and witnessed the magic potion given to the villagers, at this point anything is possible. 

She bit her lip. “I thought you said there would be music. Wouldn’t that be difficult with a bard tied up?”

Asterix chuckled. “The bard isn’t the only one who can play music.”

Just as he said that, as if cued to do so, a few of the villagers, including Fulliautomatix and Unhygenix, got up and picked up instruments, playing simple but joyful folk music to which other villagers got up and began to dance around the tables whilst more of the boars were cooking. Those still seated or eating clapped along to the tune, smiles and celebration all around. Anna couldn’t stop smiling as she watched the Gauls having fun and enjoying their feast all together. Asterix couldn’t stop smiling at seeing how happy she was. He already liked seeing her happy, a desire in him to always see her smile and make her so, just as she made his heart flip with everything she did.

Anna looked at him and smiled. “What?”

“Oh, nothing.” he turned and tried to hide his blush. “Just…I wouldn’t mind hearing you perform tonight.”

“Me? Asterix, I’m no performer.”

“Really? But I heard you sing earlier today, it sounded very sweet.”

She began to look very sheepish. “Yeah, but not at a phenomenal level. I’m nothing special.”

“Oh that doesn’t matter.” Absentmindedly, he placed a hand on hers. “Look Anna, none of us are the best out here, but we do this just to have fun, nothing prestigious or anything. We won’t judge. And in all honesty, I like what I heard from you.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely.” The two realised how their hands were and, embarrassed, pulled away and blushed. Though they both already missed how the other felt in their hand, soft and sweet, tender and without malice. If everything in the world felt like that, there wouldn’t be any reason to have the magic potion. 

Anna cleared her throat and nodded. “Um, ok, yeah, sure. I’ll see what I know, but…well, don’t know if many people would know it.”

“Well, let’s hear it. Please.” Asterix nodded, practically begging her to sing. 

Blushing, she stood up and went over to the band. After discussing the music with the villagers, making sure that they were comfortable with performing it, she took a deep breath and began to sing after the other villagers played the introduction.

“ Maybe this time, I'll be lucky

Maybe this time, he'll stay

Maybe this time, for the first time

Love won't hurry away

He will hold me fast

I'll be home at last

Not a loser anymore

Like the last time

And the time before

Everybody loves a winner

So nobody loved me

'Lady Peaceful', 'Lady Happy'

That's what I long to be

Well, all the odds are, they are in my favor

Something's bound to begin

It's gotta happen, happen sometime

Maybe this time, I'll win

'Cause everybody, oh, they love a winner

So nobody loved me

'Lady Peaceful', 'Lady Happy'

That's what I long to be

Well, all the odds are, they are in my favor

Something's bound to begin

It's gotta happen, happen sometime

Maybe this time

Maybe this time, I'll win”

Anna felt very nervous when she finished, not sure how they would take the song or her singing abilities. Instead, Asterix gave her a loud round of applause. Then Obelix and Getafix joined him. Seeing three influential members of the village receive her voice enthusiastically, the other villagers copied them and cheered for the Briton woman. Admittedly, she was astounded at this reaction, but seeing Asterix looking at her with pride made it all worth it. She looked at the warrior and smiled, knowing that he was an influence on the reaction.

However, something also pondered in her mind: where did this song come from and how did she know it so well?

The next morning, the druid was working on another pot full of magic potion, focused on his work as he mixed the ingredients in the giant pot. An ancient recipe that has been passed down for generations, only known by druids and only ever known by druids, a secret many take to the grave. His focus could not be broken as he sturred the giant pot.

*KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK*

His focus COULD be broken as someone knocked on the door and opened it. “Asterix, my old friend!” he smiled in delight. “Please come in.”

The warrior entered and sat on a bench in the druid’s hut. “I feel sick, Getafix. Unwell. I need a cure.”

The older man looked confused as he sat before his friend. “Unwell, you say? There aren’t any obvious symptoms, but please, do inform me, what ales you?”

“Well, I feel awful...and then wonderful! And then wonderfully awful and-and-and awfully wonderful. I can't eat. I can't sleep. My heart races and my breath hitches.”

“I see…euphoria you say? It hurts to breathe and yet you do not care?”

“Yes, exactly!” Asterix nodded desperately. “What do I do?!”

“Just tell her how you feel.”

“I–what?!”

Getafix chuckled. “Just talk to Anna. It is evident to everyone how smitten you are with her.”

“I-I’m not! I–”

“You’ve told me your symptoms, my friend. It’s clear as day that you have feelings for her. Your stubbornness is not going to make it any better. You need to admit it to yourself and own up to the fact that you have fallen for the Briton woman.”

Asterix sighed. His stubborn nature made it hard to believe that he could have affection for any woman, let alone the woman who appeared suddenly outside of the village from the sky. Defeated by his own heart, he nodded. “You’re right, druid. I do like her. A lot. And I want to tell her.”

“Now here’s your chance.” Getafix smiled as he gestured to the window. Outside, Anna was walking out of the village and into the forest, carrying a basket in one arm and a notebook in her other hand. Asterix looked back, then immediately rushed out to follow her, causing the druid to laugh. “Ah, love is a funny thing.”

The warrior managed to catch up with the woman as she was looking over the different plants and making notes on them as she picked and placed them in her basket. He couldn’t help but watch her. Like a woodland princess as she hummed to herself, so comfortable with nature as she was surrounded by the beauty of the forest. Though in his eyes, she was more beautiful than even nature around them.

He accidentally stepped on a branch, causing her to jump. Then she smiled. “Asterix! Hi!”

The Gaul gulped. “H-hi. Hi Anna. What are you up to?”

“Studying the plants and flowers in the area.” she beamed as she showed him what was filled in her basket, including many beautiful wildflowers.

“They are stunning.” he chuckled, wanting to compliment her the same way as the flowers. 

“Thanks. I have an interest in flowers. I just love to learn.”

“You love to learn? What about?”

“Oh, anything. Mainly about botany, horticulture, cooking, flavours, anything.”

“You cook?”

“Yeah. Food is just a beautiful art with so many tastes and flavours, it’s just wonderful.”

Asterix chuckled. “And here, we mostly have either roast boar or fried fish.”

“Here.” smiled Anna, picking a plant to show him. “Take a whiff of this.”

The man took the plant and smelled it. “Wow…what a scent!”

“Salvia rosmarinus. Imagine this roasted with the boar, or mixed with its stuffing inside.”

“Now you’re making me hungry.”

She giggled. “Perhaps I can cook for you at some point.”

“Maybe you can…” Absentmindedly, he placed a hand on hers and caressed it with his thumb. She didn’t mind as she looked at him, her cheeks turning a soft pink. Lost in their own world, they couldn’t help but gaze into each other’s eyes, especially as they were alone together with no one else around…

Or so they thought…

“Get them!” A Roman centurion yelled as he ordered his troop of legionnaires to attack and capture the two.

“Ah!” Anna curled up, terrified as she didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know how to fight back, especially against Roman soldiers.

Asterix, thinking quickly, got his gourd and drank the magic potion, becoming super strong thanks to its effects. The Roman soldiers recognised what this was and immediately became worried. 

“By Jupiter! Fall back–” the Centurion tried to command his men, but it was too late. Asterix jumped into action and immediately began to fight back, protecting Anna with all his strength and might. Punches to the head, smacking the legionnaires’ together, the warrior defeated them all with ease, anything to protect the woman he had fallen for.

The woman had never seen such a display of bravery and chivalry. In turn, she could feel herself falling further and further for the Gaul before her, watching how he defended her against the Romans’ attack.

Once done, Asterix turned and knelt to her. “Are you hurt?”

She shook her head. “No…but…but wow! That-that was incredible!”

The Gaul held out his hand and helped Anna up. “Let’s get you back to the village, ok?”

She nodded and held his hand tightly as they carefully walked back away from the scene.

Meanwhile, the defeated and badly bruised group of Romans laid on the ground, groaning in agony. “M-mission accomplished…” the Centurion murmured before fainting on the ground.

Chapter Text

Anna felt awkward as she walked hand in hand with Asterix back into the village. Not that it felt wrong or bad or anything, but that all of the villagers were looking at them. Staring rather. She gripped tight to him as she felt all the eyes on them, really not liking the fact she was the centre of attention currently. Despite this, the warrior squeezed her hand affectionately.

“Don’t worry about them, Anna.” he whispered warmly to her. “You’re with me. I’m here with you.”

She nodded. “Yeah, I am…” she blushed as they continued together until they got past the Chief’s hut. “You sure you’re not embarrassed to be seen with me? I mean, I know I’m not a Gaulish woman but…well, you saved my life from those Romans there…”

“Anna,” Asterix turned to look at her, his eyes full of warm affection. “I don’t care where you come from, I would protect you from Romans every day of my life if I had to.”

“Oh, you don’t have to–”

“No Anna, I want to.” 

She couldn’t help but blush as he gazed into her eyes, a beautiful moment shared between the two that made their hearts beat as one. It was like the rhythm of being was intertwining, making them whole and bringing them that much closer together. Anna couldn’t figure it out, especially as her memory was still shoddy at this point, but she felt herself really liking this small warrior. This beautiful warrior. Maybe something… more …than like…

“YOU!” The moment was broken as a voice shouted from inside the Chief’s hut, causing them both to jump. The voice came from, to their surprise, Cacofonix, who looked furious. “I want this woman expelled from the village!”

“Wh-what?!” Asterix looked stunned.

Vitalstatistix sighed as he opened the door. “You two better get inside for this.”

The warrior and the woman entered to get the full story as to what made the bard so angry.

“This…this outsider!” The proud bard sputtered. “She thinks she can steal my spotlight by singing terribly at the banquet when your actual bard is left dangling in the air without a chance to entertain!”

“Her name is Anna!” defended Asterix, sternly. “At least she doesn’t make it rain with her voice!”

Cacofonix scoffed, offended at even the notion. “I most certainly do not! You barbarians just do not understand my art!”

“I’m afraid to say that it is true, dear bard.” Vitalstatistix sighed, trying his best to mediate the situation. “There is a reason why you are bound and gagged at every large banquet we have.”

“Not all of them!” the bard countered. “There are a few I have attended.”

“Did you sing at them?” Anna tilted her head as she asked.

Cacofonix was about to say something, but then closed his mouth in a huff. “No..” he grumpily confessed. “But even so, I’m the village bard! Not this…this woman! She doesn’t even go here!”

Asterix grumbled, tapping his foot impatiently. “It doesn’t matter, she lives here and has a far better voice than you!”

“Oh, I don’t think–” she tried to brush off her skill without concern but the bard wasn’t having it.

“No no, I have the better voice! I will prove it to you!” he began to strum his lyre. Before the warrior or the Chief could stop him, Cacofonix began to sing a ballad that he wrote in a warbling and shaky voice, somehow more distorted than tone deaf, like off-off-key, if that was possible. 

“Oh the talent am I, oh the voice have I, no one can compare to the bard that is I…” he sang, much to the shock of Anna, who grimaced as the singing hurt her eyes. Even more amazing to her, it began to rain indoors!

“Ah great, just what we need.” Vitalstatistix groaned, hiding under his tall chair to keep dry.

Anna couldn’t take it anymore. Not only did she need to shut him up, his boasting ticked her off. This man was all bark and no bite, she thought. She immediately placed her hand over Cacofonix’s mouth, and began to sing herself.

“Don't tell me not to live

Just sit and putter

Life's candy and the sun's

A ball of butter

Don't bring around a cloud

To rain on my parade

Don't tell me not to fly

I've simply got to

If someone takes a spill

It's me and not you

Who told you you're allowed

To rain on my parade?! ”

The men in the hut were stunned in amazement as Anna sang, unsure where the accompanying music was coming from, but transfixed with her words and voice. Cacofonix huffed as he folded his arms, realising she was pointing the words at him directly, whilst both Vitalstatistix and Asterix watched her perform. She made her way out and continued outside within the village, still singing.

“I'll march my band out

I'll beat my drum

And if I'm fanned out

Your turn at bat, sir

At least I didn't fake it

Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it!

But whether I'm the rose

Of sheer perfection

A freckle on the nose

Of life's complexion

The cinder or the shiny apple of its eye

I gotta fly once

I gotta try once

Only can die once, right, sir?

Ooh, life is juicy

Juicy, and you see

I gotta have my bite, sir!

Get ready for me, love

'Cause I'm a "comer"

I simply gotta march

My heart's a drummer

Don't bring around a cloud

To rain on my parade!

I'm gonna live and live now

Get what I want--I know how

One roll for the whole shebang

One throw, that bell will go clang

Eye on the target--and wham--

One shot, one gun shot, and bam!

Hey, Mister Arnstein, here I am!

I'll march my band out

I will beat my drum

And if I'm fanned out

Your turn at bat, sir

At least I didn't fake it, hat, sir

I guess I didn't make it

Get ready for me, love

'Cause I'm a "comer,"

I simply gotta march

My heart's a drummer

Nobody, no, nobody

Is gonna rain on my parade! ”

In that moment, as he watched her in her element, Asterix knew that Getafix was right: he was in love with Anna. Now, how to tell her…?

Running back to the Camp Aquarium, a Roman scout ran to the Prefect, Armistis Rejectus, evidently excited about the news he had for the legion. Throughout the camp, many of the Roman soldiers were nursing their injuries or just relaxing after the stress of the Gauls. Included in this was Centurion Octavius Citrus, Optio Martinus, and legionnaires Acatsius, Negativius, Postitivius, and Ultimus Casus.They all watched as the scout dashed into the Prefect’s tent, stunned and confused.

Armistis smirked as he saw the scout enter the tent. “Report?”

“The Briton woman has settled into life within the Gauls in that village. She is staying in that warrior’s hut, he keeps a close eye on her.” the scout explained.

“And you are certain this is the same woman the troop heard in the forest? And who sang last night?” the Prefect interrogated.

“Yes, sir. The same Briton woman, sir.” the scout nodded.

“Good. Good job, scout.” he nodded. “You have done well. Send for Centurion Octavius!” 

the scout scuttled away and the Centurion entered. “Hail Armistis Rejectus. What news, Prefect?”

“Hail Centurion.” Armistis nodded. “Has Centurion Baloneus’ troop recovered from their encounter in the forest?”

“They still are, sir.” Octavius nodded. “The legionnaires took a heavy beating there, likely by one of those indomitable Gauls or what not.”

“Did you get his report about the woman?”

“I did, yes. She definitely didn’t fight back, she seemed more of a researcher than a warrior.”

The Prefect nodded, smirking in knowing power. “Perfect, that’s exactly what we want.”

Octavius didn’t feel comfortable with how Armistis looked and sounded. “Sir, what even is on your mind? If you have any plan against the Gauls, it’s imperative that we are informed as soon as possible.”

“Caesar would be very impressed with us if we “found” talent for his palace entertainment, hm? He would think highly of us for that discovery, don’t you think?” he smirked.

“You mean…are you suggesting that we take this woman?! Unwillingly?! Sir, that’s not what we’re meant to do. We patrol this area of Armorica and try when possible to take the village. Often unsuccessfully, but that is what I and many men here signed up for. Not to kidnap a woman to bring to Rome!”

Armistis stood up, fuming. “I am the Prefect here and you will do what I say. Now organise your men and bring me that woman!”

Octavius sighed. “Yes sir.” then he turned and left the Prefect’s tent, a mixture of emotions within him. He wanted to do his job well, especially for his country, but this plan…it felt utterly wrong to him. Trying to calm down his mind, he made his way to Ultimus Casus’ tent and rested his head on his lover’s shoulder.

“Rough meeting, “sir”?” Ultimus smirked as he teased.

“Please don’t sass me, love” groaned the Centurion. “The Prefect is really testing me and my position and I just don’t know what to do?”

“What’s up, dear?” the legionnaire sounded more concerned for him.

“Armistis has ordered my troops and I to take that Briton woman captive and send her to Rome. He thinks if he finds this talent for Caesar, the camp will be seen favourably, especially if this talent will be the entertainment for the leader.”

“What?!” Ultimas blinked. “That’s insane! Not only taking someone to be used as an entertainer for Caesar, but a woman from Britannia?! He cannot be serious.”

“Oh he is.” Octavius shook his head. “Very. I can’t do this, Ultimus. I feel so uncomfortable with this.”

“This woman is in the same village as Cacofonix, right?”

“Yeah, she is. By the description from Baloneus’ testimony, it sounds like they were attacked by that warrior friend of his, Asterix.”

The legionnaire scratched his chin as he thought, then smiled softly. “How about making him aware?”

“What do you mean?” Octavius frowned.

“I mean that you follow the orders, but somehow, our Gaulish friend would find out about this development aaaand…employ a friend or two of his to rescue her from Rome.”

The Centurion smiled and kissed the legionnaire sweetly. “My sweet sweet love, you are a genius. How can I ever thank you?”

He smirked at his lover. “You can promise to let me do the simple tasks on patrol. How about that?”

Octavius chuckled as he wrapped his arms around Ultimas. “Don’t push your luck.”

Chapter Text

Although the village enjoyed her singing, Anna had bigger issues in mind. Namely, figure out where she came from. She knew she was from Britannia…but where? And why? Why did she think of the year 1996? Ah yes, that’s her father’s birthday, 1st September 96BC. Her mother’s birthday is that day 18th November 96BC. Her birth date is 18th but of May. Phew. Ok, at least some details in her brain are sorting themselves out. She closed her eyes to think…yes. Her father’s name is Christix and her mother Viceversa, and she was originally from a small village in the west of Britannia. Near a bay. It was where she learned how to make Welshcakes, as her muscle memory proved when she was able to make them for the whole village.

Anna also borrowed a lot of books from Getafix, hyperfocusing on the historical material they contained and looking through the history so far. Ah yes, she thought, Normans and Saxons are in Scandinavia and Julius Caesar is the ruler, having conquered Britannia in 55BC. She poured hours upon hours into remembering her interests and favourite activities, including reading, studying, cooking, baking, botany, horticulture, and flower arranging. She began to make notes on all the plants around the village, and experimented with her flavours with cooking. 

The smells that wafted from the hut into Asterix’s nostrils were simply divine, as was her natural scent. He could smell her on every part of the furniture, and it was a scent that he never wanted to leave anytime soon. He never experienced anything like this before. True, he had fancied many different women that have come through the village, like Panacea and Latraviata, but none have hit his heart the same way that Anna has. Not only was she pretty, with her long blonde hair and soft doe like blue eyes, but she was gentle and kind. The soft counterpart to his stubborn and sometimes hard-edged warrior lifestyle. Sure, a lot of rumours were prevalent in the village with the fact he was housing a woman in his house, but that didn’t bother him.

It wasn’t like his feelings were unrequited either. Anna was just as taken with the Gaul as he was with her. All the meals, bakes, and flower arrangements were just for him, with the green and red of each bouquet matching his attire. She often hummed to herself as she worked, trying to keep himself busy as a thank you for staying with him.

Soon, he found her in the kitchen, mixing together a few herbs and spices. “You do work immensely hard.” Asterix softly spoke.

The Briton looked up and beamed. “How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough.” he chuckled. “What are you up to?”

“Experimenting.” giggled Anna. “thinking of putting sage and rosemary together with a hint of garlic. Might work with the boar.” She got a separate spoon and tasted it, pulling a face of uncertainty. “Hmm…mind being a second opinion?”

Asterix nodded and tasted the herb mixture for himself. He pondered as the flavours danced across his tongue in ways he never thought possible. “Wow…just…just wow!”

“That alright?”

“Alright?! That’s…something else, wow! Delicious!”

“Really?!”

“Really. You need to have a lot more confidence in yourself. It’s like your singing, you seem so unsure of yourself…”

She gulped. “Well…I don’t know why but I just…I don’t want to stand out too much or show off or what not.”

“Anna, even if you don’t want to be the centre of attention, you do still have your talents. You are a talented person, and you should own that. Even who you are as a person is wonderful.”

“Asterix…” she looked at him, her heart so full as she gazed in his eyes. What he said, it touched her heart that she knew, somehow, no one else had ever done so. She could feel her chest beating wildly as she looked into his eyes. She could see the affection he has in his eyes for her, that look she reciprocated for him immensely. As they held each other’s gaze, it was like their hearts were intertwining as one, growing closer and closer.

“Yes?” he blinked, his heart equally beating like crazy. The two of them could feel themselves getting closer and closer, each of them flicking their gaze from the eyes to the lips, the desire and tension overflowing for the person in front of them. 

Anna softly smiled. “Your brown eyes are beautiful.”

He blushed and chuckled. No one has ever complimented his eyes before. “Thank you. Your eyes are lovely. Sweet and blue, like the sea.”

It was her turn to blush. He was really sweet, absolutely charming, like the dashing heroes she read about in her favourite stories. A courageous, determined, brave man who she was the soft spot for. He was strong to the world, especially to the Roman oppressors, yet would kneel to her. She honestly couldn’t believe it.

“Anna?” his voice broke her thoughts. “Everything alright?”

“Ah, yes!” she cleared her throat. “I…realised I need more cinnamon! It’s a vital ingredient to make welshcakes you see. Given how much the village like them, I should probably make more and more of them. At least it’s calmed Cacofonix’s temperament, eh?” 

“Oh…” Asterix was a little disappointed with her words, hoping that his bubbling feelings would be reciprocated. “Would you like me to join you?”

“No no, it’s fine.” she smiled “It’s very kind of you. But perhaps you can help me by getting me the rest of the ingredients? If you could find anything like currents, raisins, or sultanas, I will forever be in your debt.”

“I’ll check the market and the traders.” he nodded. “But Anna?”

“Yes?”

Asterix gulped “When you get back there’s…something I need to tell you. Something important.”

The Briton woman beamed. “Well, I’ll look forward to that. See you in a few.” she picked up her basket and waved as she dashed into the forest.

The Gaul warrior sighed as he watched her go. He should have told her before she left. Why is it so difficult to tell her that he loves her?

Meanwhile, at around the same time, Centurion Octavius was leading his troop of legionnaires around the trees, looking for this Briton woman their Prefect told them to capture. None of them liked this idea, but orders are orders.

Positivius looked at his friend, Negativius. “I really do hope this plan does work…”

“I’m not sure…” the other legionnaire pondered in his negative outlook. “I personally feel uncomfortable with this task. I know our Prefect has insane moments, but I never thought it would reach the levels of ridiculousness that’s today.”

“I’m sure things will work itself out.” the first legionnaire smiled hopefully. “If all goes right and to the centurion’s plan, we won’t feel terrible about it all.”

“Shh!” Octavius looked to his men and put his fingers to his lips. “She’s here. Brace yourselves.” he looks back as Anna. 

The Briton woman looked around the forest with her basket in her hand, looking keenly for cinnamon growing on the trees. However, despite her hunt for spices, her mind was on the Gaul warrior and what it is that he wanted to tell her. She smiled to herself, as she thought herself to be alone with her thoughts. 

The idea to give her heart to Asterix made her excited for sure, but also made her feel terrified for some reason. She tried to remember why she felt so much fear of falling in love. Why? Was she in love before? Was there someone in her past? She tried to think as hard as possible into her past, but unfortunately, it was all fog currently. Huffing and sitting by the lake, Anna grumbles as she looked into the water. She felt annoyed and frustrated by the fact that some of her memories were still blocked from her mind. Who even was she? Why the hell did she leave her home in Britannia? And why does she feel so much fear at the prospect to love again? Does she even love Asterix? Can she love?

“Now!” she heard the Centurion and jumped as the legionnaires jumped on her and captured her.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry…” Positivius grimaced as he knocked the woman out.

Acatisius picked up the unconscious Anna and looked to his leader. “What next, sir?”

“Ultimus and I need to do one more thing. The rest of you take her to the Prefect. And remember: she is not to be harmed at all. Treat her well.” Octavius nodded. Once his men were gone, he looked to the remaining legionnaire. “You have the note for Cacofonix?”

“Right here.” He responded and handed it to the centurion, who put it on Anna’s basket, then hung the basket. Addressed to the bard, it read:

“Cacofonix,

Octavius and I are breaking many many rules for informing you this, but all of us in my troop are disgusted at our recent orders by our Prefect, Armistis Rejectus.

He has commanded us to kidnap the visitor of your village, the Briton woman, that you and your fellow Gauls currently house. His reason is to present the new talent to Caesar, and as such, the Prefect could rise in status and prominence within Roman society. 

As stated, the Prefect wanting to use this woman for his personal benefit absolutely disgusts us and whilst we cannot abandon our duty, it sickens us that this is the situation we are currently in and that this woman would be abused for this man’s benefit..

Please, assign your best warriors to the job to rescue her. We will try and keep you updated with all of the commands about the woman and if she is taken to Rome and where in Rome she’ll be taken to.

Hurry! 

Your friend,

Ultimas Casus.”

Chapter Text

Asterix paced around his hut nervously as he waited for Anna. She should have been back by now, he thought. Was she now avoiding him because of what he had to tell her? No, she said she was looking forward to it. So where was she? He didn’t expect foraging for cinnamon would take this long. In actuality, he thought he would be longer gathering the other ingredients from the market, since he had more to find. However, coming back and seeing she wasn’t there, it turned his gut inside out. He didn’t like this one bit.

Obelix came by after poking his head in, though he looked disappointed. “Aw, I thought you and Anna were going to bake more of those Celshwakes, Asterix.”

“ Welshcakes , Obelix.” the smaller Gaul huffed. “And we should be baking them by now. Where is she…?”

“Have you gone to the forest to check on her?” the friend asked as he tilted his head.

“No…I didn’t want to intrude. Especially since…well…” the warrior scratched the back of his head.

“What, what is it?” Obelix looked at his friend curiously.

“Well…” Asterix took a deep breath. “I…I’m going to tell Anna I’m in love with her.”

“What?!” he looked at his little friend in disbelief. “You…you LOVE her?!”

“Keep your voice down! Yes, yes I do…I think I’ve loved her since I met her.”

“When she fell from the sky?”

“Yes, when she fell from the sky. Do I need to make it plainer than it is??”

“And…you love her? As in, love love her? As in, possibly marry and babies and all that?”

Asterix rubbed his hand over his face, annoyed and frustrated. “YES! Yes, Obelix, yes! Maybe at some point I’ll ask her, but I don’t want to scare her off. But I love Anna a lot and I would do anything for her! OK?!”

Obelix blinked, then whispered… “Even make Celshwakes with her–”

“YES!!!!” the blonde Gaul practically exploded in annoyance at all the questions.

“But…” the red haired Gaul looked down at him. “would you still want to hunt boar with me when you’re in love?”

The warrior blinked and softened, realising why his friend had asked all the questions. “Oh Obelix…” he chuckled “Just because I’m in love with someone and would want a life with them doesn’t mean I would cut myself off from everything in the world.”

“You-you mean it?”

“Of course! By Toutatis, I think Anna would slap me if I stopped what I loved for her. She’s so supportive of what I do and like as I am with her, and that’s part of the reason why I love her.”

“So…you’d still hang out with me even with a girlfriend-wife-fiancee thing?”

Asterix chucked. “Yes, even with a girlfriend-wife-fiancee thing, Obelix. I would never stop being friends with you, buddy. Ever.”

Obelix smiled and picked up his friend, hugging him tight as he spun the small warrior around. “Oh Asterix, I thought I would lose you!”

The smaller friend chuckled. “Obelix! You shouldn’t worry yourself like that!”

Just then, Cacofonix the bard ran up to them. Even in his obviously worried state, he stopped to see this moment between the two infamous heroes of the village, a little surprised and startled. The two stopped and looked at the bard, frozen. 

“I-It’s not what it looks like!” Obelix yelped as he dropped Asterix on the ground, the blonde Gaul hitting the ground with a thump. Certain symbols appeared to sound his displeasure at being dropped, but due to the time period, no one could decipher what they meant.

Cacofonix shook his head, taking a deep breath to remind himself why he approached the barbarians in the first place. “Nevermind that, this is an emergency!”

“What? What is it?!” Asterix got up, dusting himself off.

The bard handed him the letter he received from his legionnaire friends. The small warrior read it and paled at the contents. 

Anna?! Taken by the Romans?! No…he felt his heart sink to his stomach at the thought of the woman he loved taken by his enemies. Looking at Obelix, stern, he took a deep breath and quickly thought of a plan as fast as he could.
“Asterix? What’s wrong?” the friend asked, concerned.

“We’ve got a camp of Romans to beat up.” replied Asterix, ready to kill.

Despite searching high and low within Camp Aquarium, beating up a few fair Romans in the process, Anna was nowhere to be found.

Where was she? Already in Rome actually.

Armistis Rejectus oversaw the “delivery” personally as he rode from the camp to the capital all in a night and day, barely stopping. He had to a few times when the Briton woman attempted to escape, often rolling off the horse to try and get away. Even so, the two arrived in Rome, Anna witnessing the hustle and bustle of the city for the first time in her life.

It frightened her. The crowds, the people, the noises; it was all too much for her. So many people, sounds, sights, it overwhelmed her extensively. She began to shake, only the Prefect would not let her feel her feelings.

“Control yourself, woman!” The Roman hissed at her. “You’re here to entertain these civilised citizens. Do not embarrass me!”

“So many…” she whispered, shaking. “So many people…loud…” she grimaced.

Armistis Rejectus slapped her, knocking her to the ground. “Shut up! You’re property of the Roman Empire now. Act like it!”

Anna had fight back tears as she carefully got up. No. She wouldn’t cry. She would never cry because of a man. She promised herself this years ago..

The Prefect dragged her to a building, filled to the brim with other entertainers and performers, looking to impress the Emperor and his entourage. There were singers, dancers, musicians, magicians, and many more. She felt herself getting anxious inside, but didn’t want another slap from the Biggus Dickus next to her.

The room then quietened as Caesar’s head of household, Mars Barus, arrived. “Friends, Romans, countrymen, and…others…” he addressed snobbily, looking down at the non Romans in the room. “We welcome all from the Empire to express their talents for their fellow Roman and for the Emperor. Believe me when I say Caesar wishes he could witness you all.”

Yeah right, Anna thought. She despised the Empire incredibly, however she said nothing, lest she receive another slap from Armistis Rejectus. Or worse, given her surroundings.

“Now,” the Roman in charge spoke once more. “before we begin, we have a special performance from Caesar’s favourite singer, Bianca Castafiorus!”

The pompous Roman woman, Bianca, got to the stage and looked haughtily at the other performers. Then she began to sing, an impressive voice, but a little too performed in Anna’s mind; no soul, no emotion in what she was singing: 

“Think of me, think of me fondly, when we′ve said goodbye
Remember me, every so often, promise me you'll try
On that day, that not so distant day, when you were far away and free
If you ever find a moment, spare a thought for me
Think of me, think of me warmly–”

Just then, a pillar next to the singer suddenly fell very close to her, barely missing her, and causing everyone to gasp in shock and fright. Screams flooded the room as some of the hopeful performers scattered in terror. A few even cried that this was cursed and it would be the downfall of the Empire and Caesar’s reign that it took quite a while for Mars Barus to calm the situation down, the building now half empty, much to Anna’s surprise.

“Please, please!” he looked around, trying to prevent more people from leaving. “Bianca, it’s just an accident, they do happen.”

Bianca looked furious. “How DARE you claim it is just an accident! I could have DIED! I knew I should have listened to the soothsayer!” at that, she stormed away, seemingly quit her position.

“Great…” Mars Barus groaned. “No prima for tonight’s party! No entertainment for the nobility, I’ll be thrown to the lions!”

Armistis Rejectus overheard this and pulled Anna to the other Roman. “This Briton woman can sing like Bianca!”

“This Briton?” he looked her up and down. “Can Britons even sing?”

Anna clenched her jaw as the Prefect continued to persuade the head of household. “You won’t believe it when she shows her voice. She-she can do that song Bianca sang!”

“Really?” Mars Barus raised an eyebrow. “Let us hear. I do not want to be thrown to the circus before I know what I’m getting into, especially from the advice of a lowly Prefect!”

Armistis Rejectus pushed Anna onto the stage as the music restarted. She gulped, wanting nothing more than to run away and get back to Gaul. Still, she couldn’t leave, so sang:

“Think of me, think of me fondly, when we′ve said goodbye
Remember me, every so often, promise me you'll try
On that day, that not so distant day, when you were far away and free
If you ever find a moment, spare a thought for me”

Mars Barus beamed as he heard Anna sing, knowing he hit the jackpot with her voice thanks to the Prefect. “Get her to the dressing rooms now!” 

Anna was then pulled away to get ready, not recognising herself in the mirror as she was decked in Roman finary, hair, and makeup. Still, she delivered the same emotion and depth in her voice for the song, despite her desire to be elsewhere, as she sang to the many gentlefolk of Rome.

And though it's clear, though it was always clear
That this was never meant to be
If you happen to remember, stop and think of me

Think of August when the world was green
Don′t think about the way things might have been

Think of me, think of me waking, silent and resigned
Imagine me trying too hard to put you from my mind
Think of me, please say you'll think of me, whatever else you chose to do
There will never be a day when I won't think of you

Flowers fade, the fruits of summer fade
They had their seasons, so do we
But please promise me that sometimes
You will think
Of, of, of, of me

Despite rapturous applause and praise her way, Anna felt like a shell of herself as she stood before the Romans. This wasn’t her. Sure, she loved to sing, but she loved baking more. She wanted the quiet life, she wanted familiarity.

She wanted Asterix.

Chapter Text

Asterix wasted no time rushing to Rome as fast as he could. It helped that Obelix hurried along beside him, no matter what. Also, the addition of Dogmatix on any journey was a need of serotonin that both the Gauls needed.

In truth, it was difficult for the two to traverse from their village to the capital of the Empire, considering the two were quite infamous across the Roman army. Actually, notorious would be the better word for it. 

Almost at every turn, every town and city they passed through, the Roman soldiers tried to stop and arrest them, though both Asterix and Obelix often outsmarted them or fought their way through to make their way through Gaul all the way to the city of Rome. Once they entered the city, as the sun began to set, the two realised how much they stuck out like a sore thumb amongst the Roman people.

Obelix scratched his head as he looked at his friend. “We…really should have thought about  this before we set off.”

“I’m sorry that my thoughts only consisted of ‘rescue Anna’ and that’s it!” Asterix huffed, looking around.

“So love is blind. Who knew?” the bigger Gaul mused.

“Oh you would know well.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, Mr Asterix?”

“Just that I’m not the first to be blinded by affection, Mr Obelix!”

“Ha! So you admit it!”

Asterix grumbled, then saw Dogmatix sniffing around. An idea sparked through his brain. “Well, when blind, all the other senses should be amplified.” he smiled.

Obelix blinked, trying to understand what his friend meant. “But…I can see…”

“IT’S JUST A PHRASE!” Asterix huffed again  and groaned. “Look,  Dogmatix can hear and sniff Anna out. If she’s anywhere, he’ll find her.”

The two followed Dogmatix carefully as the dog sniffed through the streets, sticking to the shadows as they followed close. Rushing between the alleys as they followed the pooch close by, they soon came to a large manor in the city. Although they expected to go up the steps, Dogmatix actually began to follow a scent around to the servants corner.

Asterix’s heart sank. “Sh-she’s a servant?!”

“Hang on, don’t panic…” Obelix then chuckled. “Hey, look, you’re now panicking and I’m calming you down!”

“Yes yes, I know, bravo!” he groaned and rolled his eyes. “I just-no…she can’t be here…has Dogmatix just followed food?”

The dog looked up, unimpressed, as if offended by the very notion that his nose could direct the two wrong, especially his beloved owner.

“Asterix, please…” Obelix tried to reason with his friend, but he wasn’t having it.

“Look, what if she’s not even in Rome anymore?! What if they’ve moved her somewhere else, and-and we’ll never see her again?!”

Then, a voice. A singing voice. Specifically one Asterix knew all too well.

Anna’s voice.

Quick as anything, he followed the voice, with Obelix and Dogmatix running close behind, and came to the servants kitchen. There she was. There was Anna. Singing and clapping along with the other performers held captive in the household from all over the Empire,  mainly from Africa, who played their instruments to accompany her, whilst others danced around the kitchen to the music.

“The seven sisters got nothing on him
I'm talking about a lover who's fast as the wind
Everyone will talk about how he got me fixed
It ain't voodoo, it's just that twist
He will be the greatest lover that ever come to pass
Don Juan ain't got the half the chance

He's a tough lover (yeah, yeah)
A tough lover (woo)
He's a tough lover (yeah, yeah)
A tough lover (oh oh)
Hey, hey, he'yeah

He'll make me laugh, he'll make me cry
He'll be so tough he'll make Venus come alive
He'll do anything that he wants to do
Step on Jesse James's blue suede shoes, yeah

A tough lover (yeah, yeah)

A tough lover (woo)

A tough lover (yeah, yeah)

A tough lover (hey yeah, yeah yeah)

A tough lover (yeah, yeah)

A tough lover (yeah, yeah)

A tough lover (oh oh)”

The two Gauls watched in amazement as she sang such a fun song, despite the circumstances, Asterix especially was captivated by her as she danced with the other performers.

When the song was done, Anna looked up and beamed in delight and awe. “Asterix!”

“Anna!” he called out as he ran to her. She jumped off the table she was dancing on and rushed to him, the two colliding in a desperate but needed embrace.

“How did you find me?” she chuckled

“Thank Dogmatix!” Obelix smiled proudly as he held the dog up proudly. Immediately, the other performers crowded around and fussed over such an adorable puppy.

“Come on, let’s get you out of here!” Asterix smiled as he grabbed her hand and was about to lead her out of the door. To his surprise, however, she stayed rooted to the spot.

“I-I can’t” she grimaced, fear dripping in her words.

“What? Wh-why not?”

“...because I’m to perform for Julius Caesar. Tomorrow.”

“So…that’s how you ended up with everyone?” Asterix tilted his head as he and Anna were sitting on her bed in the servants’ quarters whilst she explained everything that happened to her.

She nodded, dejected. “Yeah…it’s actually crazy, all of this. People like seeing me but…but I feel like a spectacle for the Romans’ expense. LIke I’m nothing but a source of entertainment and nothing more. I’m not even a person.”

“Not to me, you aren’t.” he shook his head as he gently took her hand. “You’re a beautiful person to me, always.”

Anna blushed and smiled. “Thank you. Can I just keep you around all the time?”

“As long as you want me.” Asterix chuckled.

The Briton woman tucked her hair behind her ear. “I can’t just up and leave, Asterix, as much as I want to.”

“Why?”

“It’s not just the fact it’s something massive in front of Caesar, but also, imagine if one of us isn’t there in front of Mr Big Head. More than likely, the other performers here will be thrown to the lions. I can’t have that on my conscience. All these people have been enslaved and abused by the Romans. If they die because of me…I-I couldn’t forgive myself.”

“Your heart is a wonder to behold, Anna. I really mean that.”

“Asterix, please, I’m serious.”

“I understand, trust me, but how long will this last? How long can you keep up being in this life, being an enslaved entertainer for ol’ Julius until when?”

“Well…there’s a way…right?”

“Anna, please, think for a minute. Your guilt is gonna trap you here for life and you’ll never be able to go home!”

“What is home anymore anyway?” she sighed “I don’t know where I come from, barely who I am, what I’ll even do…”

Asterix blinked and gripped her hand tight. “With me. Your home is always  with me. I-if you want it to be. With me, I mean…”

Anna looked stunned as she gazed at him. “Wh-what was that?”

The Gaul gulped, realising the moment he had been waiting for had arrived. “I…I want to share my home with you, Anna. Ever since we met…I felt like you belonged. With me. And…it hurts to be without you. Please…come home. Come home to me. I…I love you, Anna.”

She looked at him, stunned at the confession…then slowly smiled. “Asterix…I feel the same way. I think I have since we first met.” she then looked down, dejected again. “But…it’s impossible right now.”

“Nothing’s impossible, my love. Please…don’t give up. Don’t give up, Anna. We’ll find a way out of this. I won’t ever give up on you.”

“I refuse to give up on you, Asterix. I love you, and I’m not giving up on this, on us.”

Smiling at each other, the two embraced tight, feeling their affection radiate off their bodies onto the other. It was a beautiful moment. Wholesome even.

Then a crash came from the kitchen, causing the moment to break suddenly! Anna and Asterix rushed over to find Obelix on the ground, surrounded by a broken table. The smaller Gaul began to tap his foot furiously. “Really?!” he huffed.

“What?!” Obelix looked confused. “I was trying to copy the dance moves that Anna was doing. They tried to teach me.”

“He wasn’t too bad.” the African woman shook her head. “Great hip movement.”

Anna chuckled. “I’ve been saying that he has great rhythm.”

Asterix ran his hand over his face. “Yeah, incredible rhythm, dances his way into trouble every time.”

The Briton woman smiled as her brain began to work, an idea forming in her mind. “Maybe that talent can dance all of us OUT of trouble, hm?”

Her love frowned, trying to understand what she meant…then it clicked as he also beamed. “Oh, you are a genius, sweetheart!” he kissed her hand in pride.

“Wh-what?” Obelix frowned, trying to understand what she meant.

Anna took a moment to try and stop her intense blushing before answering him. “Well…I believe we’ve found a way for us all to escape after tomorrow…”

“She’s a smart one this one…” Asterix beamed in pride.

As all the enslaved performers gathered around to hear the plan for their freedom, and for Anna to return to the village with her new love, someone else was watching from a distance.

Not a Roman, but instead a man from Britannia. A man who was glaring at the Briton woman, watching her with intent and rage.

A man who knew Anna’s past…

Chapter Text

The roaring crowds of the colosseum echoed around the round arena, booming from the people to far outside the city. The Romans were ready for their entertainment. The circus was about to begin. 

Above in the dictator’s space, Julius Caesar looked down at the audience with pride and a level of smugness as he gazed upon his public. He smirked, with Armistis Rejectus beside him. “I assume plans for today's entertainment are underway, Prefect?”

“Yes, your Greatness.” Armistis bowed his head to the ruler of Rome. “Not only do we have the gladiators fighting each other and animals, we also have a special performance for you. Almost like a halftime show.”

“A…halftime show?” Caesar’s brow furrowed.

“Yeah…cause…you know…it’ll take place halfway through the circus…” The Prefect stated.

“Hmph…” The dictator didn’t look impressed. “Fine. Just as long as there are no silly advertisements for retail or cuisine…”

Armistis Rejectus grimaced. “Mmm…yes your Finest…no abhorrent and silly advertisements…nooo…” He made a mental note to cancel the planned advertisements.

Down in the makeshift dressing room, Mars Barus was helping Anna get ready as he did her hair, making it into a tall beehive style. The Briton woman didn’t feel like herself as she looked in the mirror.

“Cheer up.” Mars Barus huffed as he tugged her hair. “At least you don’t have to scrape the bottom of the Baths.”

“You don’t either!” Anna frowned.

“Quiet!” he pulled her hair again.

“Ow!” she yelped. 

Asterix, dressed in his dance attire, immediately ran to the Roman. “Don’t. Hurt. Her.”

“Honey, please…” she shook her head as she looked at her love. “Don’t…” 

The Gaul sighed and relented. “I have my eyes on you.”

“Barbarian.” Mars Barus rolled his eyes as he finished dressing Anna up.

‘Hey!” she snapped. “I may be doing this for you and your city, but you respect my man. Understand?”

“Sure…” he rolled his eyes and walked away.

Asterix smirked as he walked to the Briton. “ Your man?”

“Shush…” she chuckled, then sighed as she saw herself in this fancy posh attire, barely recognising herself. “I hate this.”

“It won’t be long, sweetheart. I promise you.” he gripped her hand tight, then kissed it. “Just this, then we’ll run to Gaul.

She smiled as the two gazed at each other sweetly, then slowly leaned closer and closer to each other. Closer and closer, almost touching…

“Hey Asterix, the gladiator said this costume makes me look fat!” Obelix walked between the two as he looked upset at the dancer attire he was wearing, interrupting the couple.

Anna chuckled at this, though Asterix looked annoyed. “You look fine, Obelix. Now really?!” the small warrior huffed. 

“Well…never danced for Mr Caesar before, have I?” the taller Gaul pouted.

“You’re not the one who could get everyone killed.” Anna grimaced as she stood up, stumbling in her fancy sandals. “Gah! I’m never trusting anyone from this country with any sort of clothing or footwear ever.”

Asterix carefully caught her. “Easy, easy…just this and done. I’ve got you. I’ve always got you.”

She smiled and sighed. “I know. That’s why I love you.”

“And I love you.” He nodded, holding her close.

The yells and screams from both the audience and the gladiators as the circus continued on. Anna could see how scared the enslaved performers looked as they all waited in the wings, the time ticking down for them to go on for this “halftime” show. She could feel the nerves in her stomach rising. Not only was this a crazy performance, but knowing they will all escape. She HAD to escape. With Asterix by her side, Obelix and Dogmatix as support, and all these amazing and talented musicians in her same predicament, they had to. They just had to break free.

Soon, their time came. Mars Barus came back in and beckoned everyone forward. 

Anna began to shake, nerves coursing through her, but Asterix took her and gently rubbed his thumb over her hand. This grounded her, soothing her immensely. It gave her the needed confidence.

As they all climbed the built stage, the group looked at each other, breathed in, then out. The music began. And Anna sang.

“ The French are glad to die for love

They delight in fighting duels
But I prefer a man who lives
And gives expensive jewels

A kiss on the hand
May be quite continental
But diamonds are a girl's best friend
A kiss may be grand
But it won't pay the rental
On your humble flat
Or help you at the automat
Men grow cold
As girls grow old
And we all lose our charms in the end
But square-cut or pear-shaped
These rocks don't lose their shape
Diamonds are a girl's best friend

Tiffany's
Cartier
Black Starr
Frost Gorham
Talk to me Harry Winston
Tell me all about it

There may come a time
When a lass needs a lawyer
But diamonds are a girl's best friend
There may come a time
When a hard-boiled employer
Thinks you're awful nice
But get that ice or else no dice
He's your guy
When stocks are high
But beware when they start to descend
It's then that those louses
Go back to their spouses
Diamonds are a girl's best friend

I've heard of affairs
That are strictly platonic
But diamonds are a girl's best friend
And I think affairs
That you must keep liaisonic
Are better bets
If little pets get big baguettes
Time rolls on
And youth is gone
And you can't straighten up when you bend
But stiff back
Or stiff knees
You stand straight at Tiffany's

Diamonds

Diamonds

I don't mean rhinestones

But diamonds are a girl's best 

Best friend”

The crowd went wild after their performance, especially as Asterix, Obelix, and Dogmatix danced with Anna through it all. The Gauls could see that Julius Caesar glared at the performance, unsure if the leader would recognise them and smell suspicion. Nonetheless, he seemed to enjoy the performance as they went off the stage to rapturous applause. 

Caesar leaned to Armistis Rejectus “Have the woman come back on stage for another performance. I need one more song before the lions can begin.”

“Yes sir.” The Prefect nodded and left. A few minutes later,  he came back, a little afraid. “Um…s-slight issue there..”

“Oh what now, you blithering idiot?!” Caesar snapped.

“Th-they’re gone!” Armistis uttered out. “They’ve just…disappeared!”

The group all ran as fast as they could through the tunnels out of the colosseum as fast as they could. Thanks to Dogmatix’s outstanding nose, they all rushed through the passages as fast as they could, with Anna and Obelix making sure they were all still together whilst Asterix, armed with the magic potion, took down any and all Romans that blocked their way. There were a considerable sum, much to Anna’s surprise, but she was impressed immensely how her man took them down with ease. Was definitely attractive in her opinion, and made her immensely proud of him.

Soon, the group came to a locked iron door.

“We’re trapped!” one of the performers spoke, frightened.

“Don’t panic...” Anna looked back and comforted the scared performer by rubbing her arms. “There’s a solution to everything. Always.” she looked to Asterix. “Right, love?”

“Right.” he nodded as he tried to pull the bars on the door, to no avail. He looked to the dog. “Dogmatix? Mind digging for us?”

The pup looked from the Gaul to the door and began to dig however, he only revealed the iron bars of the door are built in deep underground, making it extremely sturdy, but with no gap to escape.

“Leave it to me! Leave it to me!” Obelix shouted excitedly. He rolled up his non-existent sleeves and ran right to the door, attempting to knock it down with his strength. However, even with his frame and strength, he was the one that vibrated as soon as he hit the iron door with immense force. He looked very dazed as he stumbled about, singing a song he learned from the New World, then fell on some of the performers, knocked out.

“Ah!” they cried when the larger Gaul collapsed on them. “We’re even more trapped!”

“We’re running out of options, dear.” Asterix muttered to the Briton woman, holding her hand.

“No, no we’re not.” Anna stubbornly but bravely affirmed. “There’s a way. There’s always a way. We can’t be quick to give up just yet.” She shook her head.

“Anna, I love you, I admire your bravery,” he looked up at her, squeezing his hand. “but we have to admit we’re in deep trouble.”

“We’ve got to get out of here. I’m not stopping until we’re all free.” she went to the door and kicked it, to no avail. Now she was hopping around in pain thanks to that action. “Ow ow ow ow”

Asterix couldn’t help but chuckle as he bent down and began to massage her foot. “You really didn’t think that through, did you sweetheart?”

“Not quite.” she sighed, watching Obelix come to as the performers helped him off the ones he had squashed under him accidentally.

Then, something drew their attention back to the door. It…opened?

Before the door was a masked and cloaked person, who had unlocked the door and opened it for the group. The performers took no chances as they immediately dashed out and rushed to their freedom. Obelix ran out too, picking up Dogmatix on the way as he went. 

“Thank you.” Asterix spoke to the person as he ran out. Then Anna jumped out last and looked at the masked person, about to give her own thanks. Then stopped.

Despite the mask, the person’s eyes were still visible to those who looked. The Briton woman could see the eyes, a shade of amber that she had only seen before on another person.

One person that burned their eyes into her memory when they raged at her in anger.

Eyes that terrified her.

Eyes that made her remember where she came from and why she left.

She froze, shocked as she recognised the figure, looking afraid.

Asterix ran to her. “Darling, come on! We need to go.” he took Anna’s hand and pulled her away from the figure as the group ran their separate ways; the enslaved performers running home whilst the Gauls and the Briton ran to an inn before their long journey to Armorica.

The small Gaul could tell that his love was shaken by something as they got to their room. He didn’t want to pry, but he still wanted to be there for her. Instead, as she sat on their bed, he rubbed her back softly. “It’s ok…it’s ok…I’m here. I’m always here for you.”

Anna appreciated Asterix’s reassurance, smiling a little for him, but her mind was still going crazy with thoughts. The memory of that figure, recognising who it was, it scared her immensely. 

Those eyes…those damning eyes…

Even in the arms of the man she loved most in this world, she knew she wasn’t safe anymore.

Anyday now, he would show up. 

He would have her again.

Then all hope of Anna having happiness in life would instantly vanish.

Chapter Text

Throughout the journey home as the three snuck away from Rome and back into Gaul, Anna was still unusually quiet. This wasn’t like her at all, especially without her smile and laughter. Asterix was deeply concerned for her. Something shook her up badly as they escaped the colosseum, and he wanted to know what. But he didn’t want to pry, that would only make things worse. Plus, it wasn’t what she needed right now, he could see that. He loved her,  and knew she just needed support. 

As they walked back, the Gaul took her hand and squeezed it. “Love? How are you doing today?”
“Hm?” Anna blinked, realising she was deep in thought. “Oh…yeah…totally…hm…”

“You were off in your own world, aren’t you?” he chuckled 

She sighed. “Yeah…yeah I was…”

“You don’t need to tell me, but just…know I’m here for you, love.”

“Thanks. It’s just…I think my memory for everything has come back…”

He stopped in his tracks and looked at her. “Wh-what?”

“Yeah…” she nodded. “I think I remember again.”

“Do you want to talk about it? It’s ok, I’m happy to be a listening ear.”

Anna shook her head. “No…not yet at least. I still have a lot of things to think about, thoughts to shift through. Everything it-it just feels weird and honestly, the memories I have…it really makes me uncomfortable. I want to settle with them first before I open them up to you.”

“It’s ok, sweetheart.” Asterix kissed her hand softly. “It’s ok. You’ve been through a lot and your mind has to settle with it all. It can be harsh on your brain. Believe me, I know what it’s like to overthink on the past and mistakes you made.”

“You do? How?”

“Something that happened a couple of months ago, before you arrived. A Roman snuck in and found out about our magic potion. I didn’t think, just let him in, not questioning his hesitations or disguises. I should have been alert and suspicious, but I was just…stupid.”

“You really wanted him as a friend, Asterix.” Obelix laughed beside them.

“Will you shut it?” the smaller Gaul huffed but the Briton chuckled.

“Aw, you just wanted to be friendly.” she giggled.

“Besides that…” Asterix glared at her as he squeezed her hand tight. “I could have endangered the whole village if that camp got the potion and began using it. I should have been smarter. I should have thought that day.”

Anna knelt down and kissed his cheek. “Hey. It’s ok. I’m here.”

He melted to her as soon as her lips touched his cheek, smiling. “Oh I know. That’s why I feel like the days are brighter.” 

The three, along with Dogmatix, eventually made their way back to the village, greated warmly by everyone entered back in. Even Anna had a warm reception from the other villagers, feeling like she was included in the group. It helped more that Asterix informed everyone that she was now with him.

Outside of the group, the Briton noticed the bard was out on his own under the tree. She stepped away and walked to him. “Hey you.”

“Oh!” Cacofonix didn’t expect to see her, but tried to resume his nonchalant appearance. “You. Yes?”

“Asterix told me how he found out what happened to me.” explained Anna, smiling kindly.

“Did he now?” he looked away, pretending not to care.

“He was shown a letter. A letter addressed…to you.”

The bard turned red as he looked at the Briton, smirking. He huffed. “Alright! Fine! Yes! I was the one who told Asterix about your kidnapping. Happy?!”

“I thought you hated me, honestly…”

“Hate you? I don’t hate you. Sure,  I’m annoyed at your singing all over the place and how everyone prefers it over my work, but you seem like a decent person. You also seem to make Asterix happy and…well…it’s good to see a man who’s done so much for our village finally find his happiness.”

Anna scratched the back of her head, feeling a little awkward, but kept her smile up. “Well, I appreciate it. Thanks. And I don’t hate you either. You can be a bit pretentious, sure, but you’re still fun.”

Cacofonix smiled. “Well…thank you for that, Anna. I appreciate that. Glad to see you back safe and sound.”

She nodded and sighed. “So…Romans just took me for their benefit?”

“Yes, that’s my understanding.”

“So the village is taking their revenge?”

“Oh yeah.”

As Camp Aquarium were attending to their duties that day, Prefect Armistis Rejectis had returned, shaking. The Roman soldiers didn’t find Anna or any of the other enslaved performers, and Caesar would want answers. He hoped that, if the woman had tried to go back to the village, his men had caught her. Unfortunately for him, not much luck. He had to think of something fast. 

His next idea would be to dress one of his legionnaires as a woman and parade that. Yes, that might work…

Suddenly, the sound of trumpets. Drums. Claps? The Prefect and many of the soldiers in the camp rushed out to see what was happening. To their shock and horror, the camp of Gauls seemed to have formed their own marching band, loudly blasting music towards the Camp like Joshua and the Walls of Jericho, thanks to the power of the magic potion.

Both the men and women were either loudly playing instruments or dancing around. The dancers in particular kicked down the door and began fighting with the soldiers. Their dance moves were practically choreographed punches and kicks to the legionnaires faces and guts.

Asterix moved through with a snare drum, having banged it loudly on the way up, then used the drumsticks to whack the Romans whilst Obelix enjoyed actually using the soldiers as the sticks to play the massive bass drum he had.

Even the women were included as part of this “band” with them twirling in the dances that kicked the centurions in the head. Then, Anna and Cacofonix sang a duet together during the fight to the band’s music, teaming up as they joined the battle. The rain fell around them thanks to the bard’s voice, but no one cared. The Briton beamed as she sang and fought as best as she could, this new strength from taking the potion for the first time was strange but exciting as she threw punches and kicks, especially at Armistis Rejectis.

At the end of their song, the camp was pretty much decimated. She beamed as Asterix discarded his drum and ran to her, the two embracing tight and happily. For a brief moment, everything felt like it would be ok at the very least. Then, the sound of horses. Everyone looked over as Julius Caesar, with his entourage, had arrived. Gripping his girlfriend’s hand tight, the small warrior took her to the Roman leader, the two frenemies glaring at each other.

“Ah, I thought I recognised you in that performance, Gaul.” Caesar nodded haughtily. “Your dancing was…lacklustre around a talent.”

Asterix tightened his grip on Anna’s hand. “That was her last show, Julius. She belongs with me in the village.”

“Yes…I was later informed about how that “hiring process”...” the dictator snarled as he saw a beaten and bruised Prefect crawl to him. “So, you really stole a woman that was part of unoccupied territory?”

“Great Caesar,” Armistice Rejectis got on his knees, begging to the ruler. “please, all I wanted was to entertain you, sir–”

“Silence!” Caesar barked. “You have a ticket to the circus. Pack your bags: you are the entertainment.”

The Prefect looked dejected as he turned and went to pack the remainder of his things, shame running through his entire body.

Asterix looked firm at the leader. “She’s not joining the circus either.”

“Nor would I expect her to.” The Roman retorted.

Anna blinked in surprise. “I-I’m not.”

“No, my dear.” Julius Caesar shook his head. “Whilst your singing is…adequate…I much prefer the vocals of Miss Bianca Castafiorus, who has kindly agreed to return to my service. I personally enjoy only one entertainer in my employment.”

She beamed as she looked to the Roman leader. “So…I can stay?”

Julius rolled his eyes, more in the way of admitting defeat. “Yes, dear woman, you are under the protection of the village, and we Romans have no jurisdiction over you.”

Ecstatic, Asterix and Anna embraced tightly as the rest of the village cheered at this outcome.

Caesar huffed, not enjoying the Gaulish jubilation. “Yes yes yes, you win this time. But soon, all of Gaul will be under Roman rule. Make no mistake on that.”

“This won’t be our last meeting, Julius.” the small Gaul affirmed strongly. “We’ll be ready.”

“I’m counting on it.” the dictator nodded as he and his entourage rode off, allowing the village to relax.

In that moment, finally, Anna and Asterix shared their first kiss. Just as they both hoped, it was remarkable, magical, and splendid. They both smiled at each other once they parted, elated at this turn of events.

“Promise you’ll never leave me, my love?” he asked. “Never ever.”

She caressed his face and softened, her affection for him evident in every part of her face. “Never ever. I could never leave your side, no matter how much they tried.”

Pleased with her answer, the small warrior kissed his love once more, the second kiss just as wonderful as the first. Both of them knew nothing could tear them apart. Nothing in this world.

The villagers packed up their things, overjoyed at their success over the Romans in this fight, as they all returned to the village. However, they all stopped at the sight of a man, standing in the middle of the village, acting nonchalant.

Anna’s breath hitched, recognising the man. Those eyes…those amber eyes…

“Excuse me…” Vitalstatistix looked at the man, confused. “You are…?”

“Oh, my apologies.” the man smiled politely and bowed to the chief. “My name is Hesphestix. I’m Anna’s husband.”

Chapter Text

Anna froze entirely. She could feel the eyes of the village all on her. It was like her whole world was collapsing around her. 

Asterix just looked up at her. “Anna? Anna!”

Nothing. She was completely frozen. It definitely didn’t help when the other villagers began to gossip under their breaths, each whisper digging into her heart as tears prickled in her eyes.

Hesphestix smirked. “Don’t deny it, pumpkin. We’ve been married for…my, about 12 years now. I know everything about you. I know your terrible singing voice, your disgusting, terrible cooking, those stupid books you read. Even all those idiotic interests you have with plants and dirt.” he shook his head, chuckling. “Damn, you’re still pathetic I see. Acting innocent and disgustingly sweet. You may have these Gaulish idiots fooled, but you could never fool me. Ever.”

“Don’t talk about her like that.” Asterix snapped. “She’s nothing like how you describe. You’re lying!”

“Am I?” the Briton man scoffed. “Go on, chunky, tell them. Tell them I’m wrong. If you can even dare to.” 

Anna began to shake. It felt like she couldn’t breathe, like her throat was tightening, no air in or out of her. Nothing in her mind could function.

So she just ran.

“Anna!” Asterix yelled as she dashed off, running away as fast as she could.

Hesphestix chuckled darkly. “See? What did I tell you?”

The rest of the village began to murmur amongst themselves even more. “Bet you she’s not even British…” Mrs Geriatrix whispered to Bacteria.

The small warrior couldn’t take it. He tore away from the rest of the village and ran after Anna, following wherever she went. After looking all over for her, he managed to find the woman hiding behind his hut, shaking and crying.

“Darling?” he spoke softly as he knelt to her.

She jumped, stunned. “Asterix? Wh-what are you doing here?” 

“Anna…” he took her hand. “Please…I just want to hear the truth from your perspective. I know you’ve had issues with your memory since you arrived but, please. Just tell me the truth.”

She sniffed and nodded, wiping her nose. “H-he’s right. He’s my husband.”

Asterix sighed, hoping it wasn’t true. “God…how?”

Anna bit her lip. “M-my parents. They paid him in exchange for me. I was 14.”

“What?! Your parents SOLD you?!”

“It wasn’t like that! Just…Hesphestix wanted to marry me and my parents gave him money for me.”

“You’re not making it sound better, sweetheart. By Toutatis, Anna, you were 14! How old was he when he bought you?”

Anna gulped and looked at him. “Um…29.”

“So he’s 41?! That is wrong, Anna! Gods…” Asterix pulled her into a hug, holding her tight. “Anna, I’m sorry.”

At that, Anna broke further and buried her head in his shoulder as she sobbed. Everything she went through, everything she had with her husband…it hit her like a boar. 

The Gaul held her tight, comforting her as he rubbed her back. “Shh, shh…you’re not alone anymore. I won’t let you go back to him. I’ve got you.”

The Briton woman looked at his eyes and sighed. “I love you, Asterix. I-I can’t go back to that man, I just can’t.”

“You don’t need to. You have me. I love you. I’m not gonna make you go back to Britannia.” he affirmed.

“Too bad she has no choice.” Hesphestix’s voice sounded as he stood above the two.

Asterix and Anna jumped as he moved her behind him. “Anna always has a choice.”

“Not when that lard is married to me!” The Briton man smirked. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her to him.

“Ah!” she yelled. “You’re hurting me!”

“Not like you’re not used to that.” he scoffed.

Asterix looked furious as he stood up. “Don’t you dare touch her like that!”

“I can touch my wife however I like, shorty.” Hesphestix snarled as he tightened his grip around her wrist. He then pulled her with him, walking away as she looked longingly at the Gaul.

The small warrior could only watch as Anna was taken away from him. He couldn’t let this stand. He just couldn’t. She was in a horrible situation and he had to help her out of it. But how? She was married. Married! To that…jerk! That’s a sacred unbreakable bond that could not be touched. Truly, she was lost to him.

That night, the village had a banquet to celebrate their success over the Aquarium Camp. However, not everyone was in good spirits. Asterix couldn’t help but angrily glare over at Hesphestix, who was pressuring Anna to eat, who in turn was barely taking anything.

Obelix noticed where his friend was staring. More importantly, he noticed his best friend wasn’t eating. “Um…Asterix?”

“Yes, you can eat that.” the small Gaul huffed, still intensely staring at the married Britons. 

“That wasn’t what I was going to ask…” the larger man grimaced. “I can see you’re upset. It’s Anna isn’t it?”

“It’s more that husband of hers.” 

“Oh…him…he doesn’t seem very nice, does he?”

“He’s not. He’s cruel to Anna. How dare he. That woman deserves the world, not that…that horror of a man.”

“Can’t you do anything about it though? If she’s in an unhappy situation, she should just leave–”

“Marriage is sacred, Obelix. You know this. Once a couple is married, nothing can be done.”

“You think that’s why she came here? Running away from that guy?”

“Maybe…” Asterix got up, determined. He waved Anna over, who noticed and excused herself, and met him back by his hut.

She smiled, looking more relaxed as she was just with him. “Yeah? Everything ok?”

“Yeah, um…” he scratched his neck. “I-I just wanted to ask you about…everything. If you can remember. I just wanted to know if you can remember what happened before we met.”

Anna grimaced, sighed, then nodded. “Yes. My memory has returned.” She took a deep breath as she remembered how she came to Gaul. “After 12 years with that man, and pretty much a lifetime with my parents, I…couldn’t take it anymore. I had to leave. Run away.”
“You ran away?!”

“Yes. Where my village was, there was Bay. Bae Teigr, it was locally called. I found a boat in the middle of the night, and just…rowed. Rowed as much as I could with practically nothing but the clothes on my back. I had no thoughts, I just…I had to get away. Get out of there, away from everything that hurt.”

“I don’t blame you, my love.” He took her hands and gripped them tight.

She smiled, softening as she shuffled closer to him. “I’m surprised you’re not angry or distrusting of me after everything. You have more reason than anyone here, the whole village seems to hate me.”

Asterix shook his head and caressed his cheek. “I can’t be mad at you for being stuck in a situation you never could have asked for. Especially when you had lost your memory when we met. Please, continue.”

“Well…I had been rowing for a day or so…” Anna remembered. “I think I must have been on the coast of Gaul. There was a Roman galley engaged with a pirate ship, if I remember correctly. I accidentally rowed too close, and one of the galley’s oars got under my boat and…threw me into the air.”

“Which meant that, to Obelix and I, it looked like you were falling from the sky.”

“Yes. Yes, exactly. I mean, technically I did fall, just not from the sky.”

“No…” he softly smiled and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight. “But you truly fell into my lap and into my heart, Anna. Gods, I wish you weren’t with Hesphestix. You deserve so much better, love. You were trying to escape that life.” he sighed. “I can’t break that marriage, though. Nothing can. Marriage is sacred. Not even elders or druids can break it.”

She looked down and nodded. “Yeah…likewise where I’m from. Though the whole wedding was weird…”

“What do you mean, sweetheart?”

“Well…” she shrugged, “it was barely even a wedding. No special things like flowers or dresses, no real ceremony…I didn’t even get to say a word.”

Asterix perked up and looked in her eyes. “Say that again, love.”

“I…didn’t say anything during the wedding. Only Hesphestix and my father spoke, who officiated.”

“So you didn’t say anything like “I do” or “I will?”

Anna shook her head. “No. Not a word. I felt like Hesphestix didn’t like me talking. He barely likes me, it feels.”

The Gaul beamed. “Honey, you just delivered the loophole to your situation!”

“Huh? What do you mean, my love?”

“Anna, a marriage is only legally binding if both parties consent to it.” he nodded, gripping her hands tight in delight. “You would have to give your vocal consent to be considered married. I can understand those around you could have told you otherwise, since you were 14 at the time, but since you said nothing…”

She blinked, amazed. “Asterix…don’t give me false hope. Please. Because if what you’re implying is true, then…”

“Then you and Hesphestix have never been married. Not for one minute.”