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Physical therapy has been going well and Rocker is on track to be back at SWAT and in the field in about 5-6 months. Not bad considering the doctors told him a minimum of 6 months recovery would be needed after getting shot. But he has been working really hard, getting back to team leader of 50-David is his only goal. Luca has been there every step of the way to help, to encourage and support him but not seeing his boyfriend when he is at work all day long is making Rocker miss him like crazy. It doesn’t help that Luca is working longer hours these last few weeks, assisting on a case with the FBI. What also doesn’t help is when Luca is home all he can talk about is Jake, the special agent in charge of the case. Jake, Jake, Jake. He is sick of that name. Since when does Luca call people by their first names at work anyway? Sure Chris is Chris but that’s a nickname so that doesn’t really count. Everyone else is last name only. Except him and that’s usually only in the bedroom or when they are being serious about their feelings.
Today instead of heading home after PT he decides to stop by SWAT HQ. He misses everyone and it’s been a while since he checked in so he isn’t necessarily checking up on his boyfriend. Not that he doesn’t trust him, he does. He just wants to make sure the Jake that Luca talks about matches the image Rocker has of him. Almost retirement age, balding, overweight, maybe missing his teeth, warts on his nose like an evil witch, his wife following behind him because he is the straightest man to ever live.
Unfortunately that is not the case. Jake is hot and Jake is currently touching his boyfriend. His boyfriend who is laughing with Jake and not removing the hand that is on his shoulder. Rocker feels his breathing increase, his heart rate kicks up, his arms tremble and his fists clench. Eyes focused on the hand touching Luca, his Luca. Possessiveness thrums through his body.
“Hey Rocker. How are you?” Deacon asks his hand on Rocker’s shoulder breaking him out of his death stare.
“Hey Deac. I’m good” he replies giving Deacon a hug, glaring at Jake over Deacon’s shoulder. Body still tense under the welcoming touch.
“How’s the leg? Luca says you are healing really well.” Deacon follows Rocker’s glare across the room and gives him a questioning look.
“Yeah I should be back sooner than they first thought.” Rocker replies turning back to look at Deacon all the while he is watching Luca and Jake out the corner of his eye. Trying not to feel the jealousy bubbling up inside him.
“Well we can’t wait to have you back man. He has been missing you here a lot” Deacon says nodding in Luca’s direction.
“Yeah. It looks like it.” Rocker clears his throat and scowls as Luca throws his head back and laughs loudly.
Luca turns at the noise and notices Rocker is here, the smile on his face increases several notches at the surprise visit. He moves swiftly in Rocker’s direction. Rocker takes the chance to lay a kiss on Luca. It starts out as Rocker claiming Luca as his to anyone in the vicinity, it moves into something deeper and more passionate. Far more affection they have ever shown at work. Luca is surprised at first but quickly matches Rocker’s desperation. The time in hospital and the extra work Luca has taken on means they haven’t had sex since before Rocker was injured. That frustration is clear in both their possessive hands and tongues.
Wolf whistles echoing around them has Luca moving back, slightly embarrassed that he forgot where they were. “Hey baby. Missed you. How was PT?” Getting lost in each other’s gaze Rocker forgets all about Jake who followed Luca over here. All he can see is the man he loves, all he feels is that love returned to him in the hard grip on his neck and hip.
“Missed you too. I didn’t want to go home when I knew you wouldn’t be there yet. You were gone so early this morning.” Rocker pouts hoping Luca will kiss the pout of his lips.
“Sorry sweetheart Jake had a lead that we went to check up on.” Luca apologies, the name is a bucket of water on Rocker’s desire.
“Did it lead anywhere?” Rocker asks stepping out of Luca’s hold and crossing his arms.
“No unfortunately.” Luca responds looking closely at Rocker wondering why his mood changed so quickly. It’s not something others would notice but Luca can see it in the way Rocker’s eye narrow.
“So you left our warm comfy bed to go out with another man on a fruitless adventure?” Rocker questions almost angrily.
“Baby, I - “ Luca looks stunned at the tone.
“Hey Rocker!” Tan Interrupts. “How are you?” Rocker turns and accepts the hand clasp, bro hug they often share with a smile and a pretence that everything is fine. Something Luca knows it’s not but he has no clue why.
“Hey man. How is it going?” Rocker asks focusing all his attention on Tan.
“We all miss you here man. Luca is such a sad puppy coming into work without you.” Tan laughs.
“I’m sure he is fine. Especially with Jake here keeping such close company.” Rocker snarks, the comment hitting Luca like a slap. “Is Hicks around? I need to talk to him about returning soon.” Rocker moves on quickly from his cutting remark.
“Already? That’s awesome. I thought you would be out for nearly a year” Tan exclaims.
“Out of the field. But I can oversee op’s, do the admin work. Keep the recruits inline. Among others” Rocker knows he is being a jealous and petty bitch but he can’t help himself.
“That’s great man. I’m so happy for you. I saw Hicks in the break room a few minutes ago.” Tan replied genuinely happy to hear Rocker will be back soon.
“Thanks. I’ll go see him. Will you be home on time tonight?” Rocker turns abruptly and looks at Luca.
“Yeah I hope so, baby what’s” Luca starts to question Rocker’s constantly changing moods.
“Good. I’ll cook dinner.” Rocker kisses Luca’s cheek and starts to walk towards the break room.
“Ok. I love you baby.” Luca calls out to Rocker’s back.
“Yep. love you.” Rocker calls over his shoulder without turning around. Luca is rooted to the spot trying to decipher what just happened.
~
Rocker walks into the break room, if he pushed the door with more force than was necessary that is no one’s business. Hicks whips around at the noise. “Rocker, good to see you. How are you feeling? How is the recovery?” He asks pouring coffee into his mug.
“It’s fine.” Rocker says grumpily sitting down. He is exhausted and in pain and so fucking jealous. He wants to go back out and punch the guy who made Luca laugh.
“Want to try that again but make it more believable?” Hicks asks grabbing another mug and pouring some coffee bringing it to Rocker.
Rocker thanks Hicks and takes a sip. He even misses the coffee here, just another thing he didn’t think would make it more evident he hasn’t been part of this team in weeks. Rubbing his hand over his face he sighs trying to readjust his attitude. “Sorry. The doctor thinks I might actually be able to come back and do some of the admin side of the job soon. If you sign off on it too.” Rocker smiles tiredly.
“That’s great. You know we always have something to do around here if you can’t be in the field.” Hicks beams “So why do you look like you are about to murder someone?”
“What do you know about this FBI agent? This Jake?” Rocker asks into his coffee, giving in to the gnawing need to know all about this man.
Hicks laughs at how Rocker pronounces the name. Full of contempt and loathing. Pettiness and jealousy. “Uh huh. I see. You know you have nothing to worry about. Luca only has eyes for you.” Hicks reassures Rocker.
“I know. I trust him I do. I don’t know this other guy and after seeing him I trust him even less.” Rocker confesses feeling guilty about feeling jealous.
“He is driven. I will say that. Doesn’t seem like he hears no very often. But you know none of us would let him come between you two. Not after all we have had to put up with.” Hicks grimaces.
“All what? We have been professional.” Rocker asks confused.
“Yeah you have. Still doesn’t help the longing glances and the idiocy of when you first got together.” Hicks shakes his head fondly.
“No one knew anything was going on then.” Rocker protests.
“Maybe not your teams. Apart from Chris she always knows what’s going on. But I knew. Maybe not the specifics but I know when officers try to hide developing feelings. I’ve been at this a long time Rocker.” Hicks looks at Rocker knowingly.
“You’ve never said anything.” Rocker responds hating that they weren’t as stealthy as they thought.
“Wasn’t my place. Like you said you have been professional. You weren’t his team leader so no boundaries were being crossed so there was no need for me to step in.” Hicks says matter of factly.
“What do I do about this?” Rocker sighs deflating. He knows Luca wouldn’t do anything but Rocker has never felt like this about anyone. He has never been so consumed with love before. The thought of anything coming between them has him acting like an idiot.
“Talk to Luca. Tell him you trust him. Tell him you don’t like the attention Jake pays him, and it’s a lot of attention. I highly doubt Luca even realises he is being flirted with.” Hicks chuckles.
“What are you talking about? He is one of the most observant people here.” Rocker defends Luca despite the annoyance he feels.
“He is. Except when it concerns him. How long did it take him to realise you were interested?” Hicks asks raising his eyebrows over his coffee mug.
“You may have a point. I can’t talk to him. Not now and not here. I’m way too exhausted from PT and if I look at that guy I will be in cuffs for assaulting a federal officer.” Rocker says pushing his coffee away. No amount of caffeine is going to help him right now.
“Well I suggest you go home. Sleep off the anger and talk to Luca later. We can discuss your return to work another time.” Hicks says understanding the visit here today was less about work and more about Rocker’s fears.
“Thanks Commander. I will talk to him tonight. As long as he is home and not off chasing leads with Jake.” Rocker spits out the name still holding onto the anger for now. He needs the fire to keep him from falling asleep on the drive home.
“You’re welcome. We will make sure he isn’t. Leave through the back, so you don’t have to punch any feds, not interested in adding to my pile of paperwork thank you.” Hicks laughs clapping Rocker on the shoulder as he shakes his head and leaves the room.
~
“You ok Luca?” Chris asks after Luca doesn’t move.
“Did Rocker seem off to you? Like pissed off?” Luca asks still staring at the door Rocker walked through.
“I’m sure he is just tired after PT. Not being able to work has got to be frustrating for the guy. Especially when he sees you going to work every day. The Jake of it all probably doesn’t help either.” Chris sympathises with what she would be like if she were in Rocker’s shoes.
“What? what do you mean the Jake of it?” Luca finally looks at her his expression would have made her laugh if he didn’t seem so seriously lost.
“Really? No idea what I’m talking about?” Chris asks gesturing in Jake’s direction thankfully he moved out of ear shot when Rocker and Luca continued to try and eat each other’s faces off.
“Rocker hasn’t had a problem with working with the feds before. Why would he have a problem now?” Luca looks between Chris and Jake still not understanding where the problem lies.
“It’s not the feds Luca.” Chris assess Luca’s confused expression.
“What is it then?” Luca demands not enjoying the guessing game he didn’t realise he was playing and wanting to stomp his feet like a toddler. Someone needs to tell h what the hell is going on.
“Oh my god, I do not get paid enough for this” Chris says gripping the bridge of her nose and sighing deeply. “Look at Jake. Really look at him, now think back to how often you talk about him when you get home.”
“I only talk about him because he is in charge of the case we are on right now.” Luca protests.
“That maybe but look at it from Rocker’s point of view. You guys work together, live together, now he can’t be here and all of a sudden you are talking non-stop about another man.” Chris lays it out.
“What you think Rocker is jealous? There’s no way. He knows I love him, he knows he is it for me. Why would he be jealous?” Luca asks stunned that Chris thinks this is what is happening.
“So you’ve never noticed how hot Jake is?” Chris asks shocked.
“No. He isn’t Rocker why would I look at him that way when I have the man I want?” Luca asks seriously, looking at Chris like she was suggesting he set fire to Black Betty.
“Ok you might not have looked at Jake but he has been looking at you.” Chris argues.
“What? No way!” Luca exclaims.
“Who else did he call first thing this morning to go check out a lead? Who does he sit next to at every meeting? Who does he joke around with all the time? I’m surprised he hasn’t asked you out for a drink yet.” Chris asks leading Luca along the evidence.
Luca blushes and his face falls at the same time. Shock and despair evident on his face.
“Oh my god. He asked you out? When?” Chris cries out, clamping her hand over her mouth when Luca shushes her.
“Tonight. But he made it sound like he asked everyone out for drinks. As a team” Luca tries to explain, thinking back to what else he had missed.
“He hasn’t asked me and I’m positive he hasn’t asked any of the other guys.” Chris informs Luca. “Didn’t you tell Rocker you would be home for dinner though?”
“Yeah I was gonna go home have dinner and pick him up to bring him out with all of us.” Luca sighs out, god he has made a mess of things.
“Jake knows you have a boyfriend right? I mean before today?” Chris prods.
“Of course. You know I don’t shut up about Rocker.” Luca answers honestly. Why wouldn’t he tell everyone he met about his amazing boyfriend.
“True. So he is trying to steal another man’s boyfriend. I officially hate him” Chris declares, claiming her right as Luca’s best friend to hold grudges she knows he won’t.
“Is this my fault? Him asking me out?” Luca asks folding in on himself. Terror that Rocker might actually think he is interested in someone else fills his body.
“No. You are a golden retriever and are just happy to talk to everyone. You don’t even look at them with suspicion or ulterior motives. He knew you were taken and still asked you out. That is low. You do need to talk to Rocker though.” Chris states in her no nonsense way.
“You really think he is jealous?” Luca asks quietly, looking like a kicked puppy.
“Luca” Chris says exasperatedly “He can’t do his job right now, something that is tied to his identity. How did you feel when you were out with your hip injury? Add on that he has to see you go to that job every day without him and now you, in your adorable golden retriever way, have made a new friend. I bet you aren’t having sex right now either. What do you think he is feeling?” She asks softly knowing Luca had no idea what it looked like to anyone else.
Luca feels like he has been slapped. He didn’t look at it like that. “I have to go find him now. Hicks, is Rocker still here?” Luca asks as Hicks walks past.
“No he just left. Said he was exhausted and needed to get some sleep. What’s going on?" He asks sipping his coffee wondering if Chris has been able to get Luca to see what has been happening.
“I’ve been an idiot. I need to go. I need to talk to him. Now.” Luca states determined to fix this.
“That’s not going to be possible we have a concrete lead on these guys. We are rolling in 10.” Jake interrupts walking up to the huddle and placing a hand on Luca’s shoulder. He abruptly moves out of reach.
“Luca can you focus enough to take these guys down?” Hicks asks raising a knowing eyebrow.
“No sir.” Luca declares moving further from Jake.
“Then get out of here.” Hicks nods towards the exit before turning on the FBI agent. “Use 50 squad if you need more officers, agent.”
Jake splutters at the dismissing tone Hicks flicks his way.
“Don’t call me again.” Luca says to Jake. “If you need anything for the case Hondo is the team leader. Talk to him. Thanks Chris.” Luca brushes a kiss to her cheek before running out the door.
“Go get your man.” She calls out as Luca runs off. “Snake” Chris hisses at Jake’s back and following him to situation room.
~
Luca races home to tell Rocker he was only telling him about Jake and the case to try and make him feel included in what was happening still. But Rocker is fast asleep on their bed. He must have fallen asleep the moment he sat on the bed, his head isn’t on the pillow properly and his feet aren’t even on the bed. Luca takes Rocker’s shoes off and placing his legs on the bed. Grabbing a blanket he covers his boyfriend and gets on the bed beside him. Luca cuddles up to his man and breathes him in deeply. There is no way he would intentionally risk losing this. He has been an idiot, again. Gripping Rocker tighter to him he lays awake hoping he can make things right.
Hours later Luca still hasn’t unwrapped his arms from Rocker’s body. Spending the whole time trying to get Rocker to understand how sorry he is. How dumb he has been. He feels Rocker’s breathing change, letting him know he is starting to wake up. Luca clutches Rocker tighter to him. Kissing his neck.
“You’re home?” Rocker asks unbelieving looking at the clock. “Why? What’s wrong? Is someone hurt? Are you hurt?” Rocker tries to turn in the hold but Luca holds him in place.
“No, nothing like that. I had to make sure we were ok. That was more important because there was no way I could stay focused if I was worried about you being upset. I’m so sorry baby. I thought I was helping you feel more connected to work. I didn’t even know he was flirting with me. And I never flirted back, at least I don’t think so. I was just trying to be friendly. I promise. I’m so sorry baby, I never meant to hurt you.” Luca kisses the spot behind Rocker’s ear that he knows his boyfriend loves.
“I know baby. It did help to start with. Hearing about your day. How everyone was doing. But then you would talk about Jake. Only Jake it felt like, maybe that’s because I was jealous and it’s all I focused on. And then. Well. We. Why haven’t you touched me? Like more than a hug and a kiss, not that I don’t love those but I nearly died and we haven’t had sex since. I thought maybe you didn’t want to anymore.” Rocker says feeling stupid for missing their intimacy so much, for thinking Luca didn’t want him as much as he still wants Luca.
“Oh sweetheart. I didn’t want to re-injure you. I wanted to wait until you had healed more baby. I’m so desperate to touch you I knew once I did I couldn’t stop. But I didn’t want to be the reason you popped stitches or the artery repair didn’t hold.” Luca’s heart breaks a little thinking Rocker ever had that thought.
“My doctors never said we couldn’t.” Rocker states turning in Luca’s grasp so they can be face to face.
“I know but I was really scared to do anything that could make your injury worse. I almost lost you because I put work ahead of you, I didn’t want to put my wants ahead of your recovery and make things worse. And I didn’t even realise he was flirting with me. I swear baby, ask Chris what I said when she asked me what I thought of Jake’s looks. I swear I only have eyes for you baby. You own my fucking heart. Don’t ever be jealous baby. I only love you Donovan.” Luca pleads for Rocker to believe him, stroking a hand down Rocker’s cheek.
“I never didn’t trust you. I just hate that I couldn’t be there every day. That someone else did. I know logically you wouldn’t leave me for him but man it’s been a hard few weeks. I miss you so much Dom.” Rocker admits kissing Luca lightly on his lips. Slowly turning Luca on too his back and placing his weight on his boyfriend.
“I miss you too. Are you sure I won’t hurt you?” Luca asks concerned but desperate to deepen the kiss, to push Rocker’s body down into his.
“You could never baby.” Rocker says grinding his hips down as if he could read Luca’s want in his eyes.
“Goddamn it. I need to buy Chris more flowers.” Luca exclaims breaking the kiss and running his hands through Rocker’s hair.
“And Hicks.” Rocker murmurs against Luca’s neck between kisses.
“Really?” Luca asks shocked at that information but soon finds himself too focused on what Rocker’s tongue is doing.
“I will tell you about that later. Right now I need you to show me how much you love me and only me. Because I love you Dominique Luca.” Rocker says looking into his boyfriend’s eyes.
“Only you baby. It will only ever be you Donovan.” Luca says pulling Rocker down on to him to show him exactly how he feels.