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There were rose petals scattered over every surface of the café. Fucking rose petals. Bright red everywhere. Leblanc smelled like an overstocked florist and it did nothing to help the stress headache Goro could feel forming. This was already way too extra for him, but he doubted this was the only thing Akira had up his sleeve for today. Shit, how much did this many roses even cost? The perks of being loaded and working part-time in a flower shop, he supposed.
When his partner had insisted on the detective coming over for Valentine's Day, he had been prepared for Akira to make a bit of a fuss. What he hadn't expected was the corny setting straight out of a romance movie aimed at a much sappier target audience. Why the fucking idiot had thought this would appeal to Goro, he had no idea.
The offending petals smothered the stairs in a trail leading upwards. Akira's room likely also contained some surprises that would make Akechi want to vomit from the pure sugariness. There was no sense in putting it off, so he stomped grumpily upstairs without so much as stopping to say hello to Sakura, who was shutting up shop for the day. As expected, the entire attic was choked with red rose petals and drowning in their floral scent.
Akira was suspiciously absent. Everything was silent. If it weren't for the shower of petals and the fact his boyfriend had specifically asked him here, Goro would have assumed that no one was home. Where the fuck was his criminal trash?
A quick glance of his surrounding revealed a small black box on the bed wrapped in red ribbon. He already felt nauseous as he moodily approached to investigate. Part of his didn't want to so much as touch the box in case it encouraged further bullshit like this in the future, let alone open it, but he could already see the pout Akira would give him if he outright refused. No matter what he thought he never seemed to be able to refuse that irritatingly persuasive rat.
The box rattled faintly as the detective lifted it with a gloved hand. He stared with utter contempt, pinching the ribbon at the very end like it was something contaminated and giving it a tug. It came loose easily enough and allowed Akechi to lift the lid off what was so glaringly obviously a box of chocolates.
Hearts. The chocolate were shaped like fucking hearts, because of course they were. It was beginning to seem more and more likely his boyfriend was deliberately trying to humiliate him. A folded note sat in the top of the box, a fluffy otter holding a heart depicted on the outer side.
Oh no.
Unfolding it was sure to inflict some terribly cringy word play on his, but at this point it was like watching a car crash; Goro couldn't stop despite the pit in his stomach.
'I otter ask you to be my Valentine! Will you, my significant otter?'
"For fuck's sake, Akira!"
"Aw, I knew you'd love it, honey," an annoyingly chipper voice piped up behind him. The sneaky shit must have been hiding somewhere. To make himself feel better, Akechi imagined Akira cramming himself into Leblanc's tiny bathroom and staying there while he waited for him to arrive.
The detective whipped around to glare viciously at his boyfriend, baring his teeth aggressively. It had definitely all been on purpose, because the attic's resident looked far too pleased with himself. The amount of effort it must have taken to set all this up showed a true dedication to pissing Goro off, and he couldn't decide whether he admired the gall or whether he wanted to crush Akira's windpipe with his bare hands.
"Have you swallowed a damn romance novel?" The question was more of a demand than anything, teeming with barely restrained fury as that pungent floral scent continued to scratch at the edge of his senses. "Did you finally snap and lose your final working braincells? In what world did you think this bullshit was a clever idea?!"
His piece of shit seemed unaffected by his strong show of displeasure. Unsurprising. Akira had never once seemed bothered or fazed by the darker parts of Goro's temperament. He walked casually forward towards the detective and smiled like he knew something everyone else didn't, the way he always did. The incredibly punchable yet alluring face of fate's chosen Trickster.
"I thought it would be funny to be ironic," he explained with the faintest huff of a laugh. "Lighten up, honey. I know you better than this."
That was the thing, wasn't it? That was what cut right to the core of everything Goro felt. Akira was annoying, and smug, and made stupid jokes, and was generally frustrating. But underneath all of that, he knew the deepest parts of the detective; saw all the ugly and violent parts and loved him because of them, not despite them. It was the same the other way around. He knew Akira like the back of his hand, and he loved him precisely because of his smug cheekiness and unflappable swagger.
Even though he still wanted to be furious that his time was wasted with any of this nonsense, Goro couldn't reasonably stop Akira from having his fun. Life would be admittedly boring if his boyfriend suddenly found ways to pass the time other than being a little shit.
"Why do I put up with you?" There was much less severity to his tone this time, and he was having to fight back a smile. In hindsight, a detective such as himself should have known Akira well enough to know there was never a chance this was serious, but what could he say? So much saccharine crap had inspired a visceral reaction.
The leader of the Phantom Thieves wrapped his arms around Goro's waist and bent his neck to drop his head onto one of his shoulders. He made no move to reciprocate the affection, but he did allow himself a moment of weakness soaking in the feeling of Akira's body heat against him. Subtle moments like this were much more their style.
"I'll kill you if you actually called me over here just to prank me, and this time I'll actually finish the job," Goro eventually grumbled out half-heartedly, breaking the temporary silence and twisting in his boyfriend's hold to face him. "What have you actually planned?"
Akira released him slowly from the cage of his arms and went rummaging in his trouser pocket. The sound of countless little bits of tat bumping together filled the room. How someone could stand walking around with so much shit in their pockets, Akechi would never understand. Eventually, he found what he was looking for and pulled out two folded up coupons for Jazz Jin.
"Free drinks for Valentine's Day, and the singer is there today too!"
"... Akira, Jazz Jin don't offer any 'free drinks' deals."
"Eh, I know a guy."
The amount of times this mysterious prick said that made Goro want to scream, but apparently he could benefit from all of Akira's shadowy and secret connections too.
He let out a grunt of irritation and lightly swatted his boyfriend on the shoulder. The absolute freak just beamed at him, and this time Akechi really couldn't hold back his smile. His lips quirked up against his own will and before he knew it he was even cackling a little, feeling strangely light in his heart. Akira really did know his well, a quiet evening in the relaxing atmosphere of Jazz Jin was exactly what Goro would have chosen to do had he planned their Valentine's evening.
"Fine, you sneaky bastard. Let's go before I suffocate on the smell of these stupid fucking flowers," he complained with an edged grin. They didn't waste any time in heading out of Leblanc together, walking in the chilling February air towards Yongen-Jaya station.
The silence as they strolled was comfortable, and, just because it was Valentine's Day, Goro allowed it when Akira reached over to intertwine their fingers. Despite the earlier disgust at all the overdone holiday traditions, Akechi had to admit that his boyfriend had really pulled through for a decent evening.
Being in love with an irritating yet perceptive bug wasn't so bad after all.