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Guanheng slammed the door behind him, barely able to complete a breath before sobbing. It wasn't meant to be this way. He knew Ten was never going to be with him, but to find him kissing his own member made it hurt even more. He feels so selfish for crying over something he knew would happen, but it's just too much for him.
*
"Don't act like we don't know."
Kun froze, his mouth stuck in a small 'o' shape. Redness creeped up his neck and ears slowly. "Oh, did you catch us?" He chuckled awkwardly, avoiding Sicheng's stern look. "Uhm yeah, I guess you could say me and Ten are together." Sicheng sighed and stretched his arms, sliding off the stool and walking into the kitchen.
"It was obvious you two liked each other from the start." He said, coming back out with a water bottle. "I knew it from the moment you automatically had to be next to be next to him. You also had to compliment him even if he did the bare minimum. Lovestruck." He tilted the bottle to his lips as Kun shook his head furiously.
"What– no! It's not my fault he's so talented in everything."
"He'll blink, and you'll be screaming about how amazing his blinking skills are."
"Shut up!"
Guanheng dragged his gaze from the two of them, preferring to look at his untouched food. It wasn't even enough, but the topic of Kun and Ten being together ruined his appetite, probably for the whole day. He stood up and threw the food in the bin, catching Kun's eye. "Hendery, you could have told me you didn't want to eat it."
Guanheng shook his head, putting the plate in the sink and walking out of the kitchen. "I did, I just don't have the stomach for it anymore." He tried not to come off as rude, but his body betrayed him, and it sounded more like a hiss. Kun nodded and picked up his mug again. At the same time, Ten appeared magically, and Guanheng wanted to do nothing but air out everyone in the room, then himself. He stood behind Kun, his head rested on Kun's shoulder. Kun's hand came up to stroke Ten's head.
He spoke in a mix of Mandarin and English. "Hi, everyone."
Sicheng cringed and turned away. "Can you two have your lovey-dovey moment somewhere else? The other single people here don't wanna see this. You're the minority." Kun faked an offended gasp, and Ten laughed at that before kissing his neck. Sicheng gagged.
"Hi, Winwin and Hendery— oh Hendery." Guanheng lifted his head up, and he was hit with the sight of a concerned Ten pouting. "You have eyebags. Did you even sleep last night?"
"Barely." He laughed in an attempt to make it seem like it was no big deal. "I haven't been able to sleep normally in weeks, so I'm a bit used to it." He closed his eyes and rubbed his temple. "Yeah, used to crying yourself to sleep, you are," a voice said in his head, a headache following after. He whined and rested his head on the cold marble of the kitchen island.
Ten sighed. "That's not good." You're the cause of it, so keep quiet. "If it gets worse, you'll need to tell someone." You talking makes it worse.
After that, Kun and Ten talked for a while before Ten said something to Guanheng again. He didn't hear it because the only thing playing in his head was his heartbeat pounding in his head. But he was able to hear something like 'Do you need medication?' So Guanheng managed to whisper, 'I'll be okay." Before he felt himself drifting into sleep.
*
"I need a drink so fucking badly." Guanheng groaned as he swung open the door to Yangyang's room, who was too engrossed in his video game to greet him. "Hello to you too, bastard." He collapsed onto his bed and pulled a pillow over his head.
"Didn't even really say hello." Yangyang said once his character had died, pulling out his headphones and closing the game. He twirled in his chair as he asked. "What's up with you?" Guanheng lifted his head up and laughed, shocked that Yangyang was asking him any questions even though he had cried to him about it less that 2 hours ago.
"I told you already. Kun and Ten."
"Don't come to me." Yangyang raised up his hands. "I'm the most single fucker ever." Guanheng cursed himself for going to this useless piece of shit for advice.
Guanheng propped his head up with his elbows. "We can tell. You sit down all day playing on that PS5 of yours and playing with Coco. Only God knows when the last time you went out was." Yangyang picked up a pillow on the floor and tossed it in Guanheng's direction, but it hit the wall instead.
"Go to Xuxi's or something."
Guanheng rolled on his stomach. "He's busy. I don't wanna go to Dejun, because 50/50 chance he'll take Ten's side and I'll have an argument with him... I'll go to Johnny's."
"Why not go to fellow Chinese friend Chenle's?"
"That's the devil."
"Renjun?"
"Second in command."
"Fine, go. I want you out of here anyway." Guanheng eyed the remark and picked up the pillow, launching it at Yangyang, hitting him in the stomach. "Ow!"
"Go and rot in your room, bastard."
*
It doesn't take very long for Guanheng to arrive at the 127 dorms. Mark opens the door to him and greets him with a handshake, and he leads him up to Johnny's room. When Guanheng enters, the man is lying on his bed, scrolling through things on his phone. He looks up and drops the phone, shock plastered on his face. "Yo, Hendery, I didn't expect you to be here."
Guanheng closed the door behind him and sat on the edge of the bed, running his hand through his hair. "Yeah, just needed someone to vent to about." Johnny's eyebrows dropped, and he nodded, sitting up and crossing his legs.
When he spoke, his voice had become much softer than when he last spoke. "Yeah, that's fine." Guanheng kicked off his shoes, crawled next to him, and picked up a pillow to hug.
"I mean, it's kinda embarrassing, now that I think about it. Why was I even crying about it when I knew that I wasn't even going to end up with him in the first place."
"Who? Ten?" Hendery nodded.
"Yeah. Turns out he likes Kun." He huffed, burying his face into the pillow to stop himself from breaking down in front of his friend. "Ugh, I don't wanna feel— ...jealous, but I can't even help it." Johnny put a comforting hand on his neck, his thumb running up and down his nape. "And now I'm probably never gonna get over him."
"I mean, I don't really have much to say but that it's okay to be jealous, you just care, but one person alone isn't what you're worth, Hendery."
Guanheng shook his head, and he felt tears wet his eyelashes. "I know, but...I—" He couldn't even complete his sentence before his was bawling his eyes into the fabric of the pillow. Johnny didn't speak. He only waited quietly, rubbing his back until Guanheng's sobs reduced to shaky breaths and sniffles. Guanheng wiped his tears away, which only returned, and laughed bitterly. "Heh, sorry for making a mess on your pillow."
Johnny's eyes were focused on the tears running down Guanheng's cheeks. "It's okay." He shifted forward, climbing over his legs as the mattress dipped under his knees. His hands came up to cup Guanheng's face, and he wiped the streaks of tears away with the rough pads of his thumbs.
The air that was already silent enough fell even more silent, and Guanheng's heartbeat accelerated. "I- uhm, could have just done that myself." He said shyly, drying the corners of his eyes with his knuckles.
"I felt like doing it." He said, letting go of his face. Guanheng really wanted his hands back on his face, rubbing his cheek and warming his face up. "You've cried too many times. I just grew tired of watching and not doing anything about it." He continued. "You're too pretty to be doing so."
Guanheng's face burned red in an instant. "John— what... hey! Are you saying that just to make me feel better?"
"No! I genuinely mean it, Hen. You look like you dropped from the heavens above."
"... And you're handsome, too." The room went silent again. Guanheng's gaze lowered to Johnny's torso, and he picked at the hem of his tank top. Why did Guanheng even open his mouth. Well, Johnny is extremely pretty. He can't lie. His skin is a beautiful tan colour, and every blemish on his face just makes him look twenty times better. Speaking of his face, Guanheng thinks about his friend's lips sometimes. They're much bigger than his, and he wouldn't mind pressing a kiss to them at all.
Guanheng realises something.
He really wants to fucking kiss him.
"I really wanna fucking kiss you."... Fuck.
Johnny's pretty taken aback by that. His startled gaze and parted lips are enough to say it all. Guanheng's hand flies over his mouth, as it should, silencing him from saying any more. "Uhm, I shouldn't have said—" Johnny's hand curled gently around Guanheng's wrist, and he peeled his hand away and placed it on his lap.
"It's fine." He murmured. His voice was laced with something indescribable, something that made Guanheng's heart flutter. He tried to look anywhere but at Johnny himself, but he could feel his gaze burn him. Just as Guanheng thought it could get any worse, Johnny held his chin and moved his head so they were staring right into each other's eyes. Before he could apologise again, Johnny closed the distance between them.
Johnny kissed slowly, almost like he knew what Guanheng wanted at the right time. Johnny's arms came slowly around his waist, and he pushed Guanheng onto his lap, making the even closer and deepening the kiss. Guanheng's arms wrapped around his shoulders. He couldn't help but whine into his mouth. Fuck, Johnny is a good kisser.
He stopped kissing Guanheng and moved down to his jaw, pressing soft kisses to his jaw before sucking on his skin, leaving a faint red mark there that would soon blossom into something much more darker. Guanheng knew he wasn't going to hear the end of it from his members later, but he couldn't care. Right now, he just really wants Johnny's lips on him.
Almost like if Johnny could read Guanheng's mind, he brought their lips together again, this time sliding his tongue past Guanheng's teeth. It sent jolts through Guanheng that somehow managed to settle down there. Thank God Johnny's eyes were closed, or he would have seen something growing in Guanheng's pants.
The door swung open abruptly. "Johnny— oh, am I disrupting something?" The two broke apart, Johnny slowly turning to the voice and Guanheng lowering his head. It's was Doyoung and Jaehyun. Jaehyun had his hand over his mouth and was giving Doyoung an accusatory look.
"Oh my God, Doyoung did that."
Johnny laughed and threw a pillow at the door, the door shutting on their shocked faces. "Great timing, you two."
fin.