Chapter Text
Rodrick’s been worried for Greg.
He doesn’t really know how to approach the situation. He’s never been an affectionate sibling. He’s never been good at mushy, deeply emotional conversations. Almost everyone around him knows that. At least not until Frank had started beating him.
Bastard.
He can’t really remember much from the time the Heffleys were a functioning family. Since then, he’s always had a hard time trying to show concern. This, however, was under different circumstances.
Greg’s dark circles have gotten worse. They’ve always been a permanent part of his appearance for a while now, but it’s been harder to ignore. Even the bags under his eyes have bags...
He’s only been wearing long sleeves despite it being scorching hot most days. Rodrick had even called him out on it. When they were sitting on the couch, Rodrick had noticed Greg fanning himself, beads of sweat forming on his forehead.
“Why are you wearing long sleeves in the middle of summer? Aren’t you sweating under that thing?”
Greg seemed extremely peeved by the seemingly harmless comment Rodrick had made. His head sharply tuned and he glared at Rodrick.
“Can you stop being nosy? It’s none of your business. I just like long sleeves.”
Greg then immediately got up the couch and went upstairs. Rodrick stared at Greg’s figure disappearing into his room with a confused and slightly annoyed expression.
Since that day, Rodrick’s only been noticing more signs, whether he wanted to or not. Greg’s completely checked out a lot of the time. He’s been staring off into space. During breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Even when Susan forced Rodrick to go pick Greg up. He doesn’t even look out the window. He just stares at a random spot for almost the entire ride in complete silence. Unless Rodrick talks to him. Even then, he’ll only utter one word responses.
He’s been eating less as well. He only pokes at his food and pushed it around his plate. Susan had even asked him about it during dinner one time.
“Honey, what’s wrong? You’ve hardly touched your food.” She said with the concern equal to a sitcom mom in a ‘serious’ episode.
Greg didn’t even look up at her as he replied in a quiet, flat tone.
“I’m fine, Mom. Just not that hungry.”
She hadn’t pressed Greg any farther than that and left it alone.
Even if Greg had been annoying and bratty only a few months prior, at least he had a personality then. Now it’s like he’s some kind of zombie, going through life on autopilot.
Rodrick recognizes that expression because he’s worn it himself countless times before.
That’s why it scared him. As much as he dislikes admitting it.
At this point, Rodrick feels like he has to at least try and do something, even if Greg just gets annoyed and shuts him out.
He knows he would never be able to live with himself if he didn’t make a shitty attempt.
He knows Susan won’t ever do anything about it. Sure, she might ask him about why he’s been acting so off lately. But unless Greg himself says he’s not feeling well, she won’t ever press to try and get the truth out of him.
She’s desperate to keep her stupid delusion of being a, ‘perfect family,’ alive. Both for other people that might be watching, and for herself. And Frank? Forget it. He hardly even acknowledges Greg unless it’s to remind him to never turn out like Rodrick.
So here he is, slowly trudging up the stairs towards Greg’s room. Susan had taken Manny to a doctor’s appointment. And Frank was at work.
‘This is so humiliating…’ Rodrick thought to himself.
He prays he doesn’t accidentally fuck this up. He doesn’t have a good feeling this will go well. He swallows, feeling a lump in his throat, trying to ignore the pit forming in his stomach.
He slowly walks to Greg’s room just two doors to the left.
He reaches for the door knob, he hesitates for a moment.
He took a deep breath and closed his hand around the knob.
He gently opens the door.
“Hey Greg…Can I talk—“
His eyes widened in horror.
.
.
.
‘Oh fuck.’
‘Oh fuck…’
Greg makes eye contact with him. He was sitting on the floor, a box cutter in his grip and a roll of gauze next to him.
Rodrick’s box cutter.
Greg’s breath was uneven and shaky. He looked terrified and frozen in place.
There was blood dripping onto the beige carpet of his room. He had numerous wounds from his wrist, all the way down to his elbow.
They varied in depth. Some were superficial and shallow. Others made Rodrick terrified for Greg. He couldn’t even process what the hell he was look at right now.
Rodrick felt his heart drop to his stomach. He could feel his mouth dry and his ears starting to ring. He instinctively covered his mouth. He could smell the metallic, coppery notes of the blood.
“G-Greg. W-what the hell are you doing?! I—Dammit, put the box cutter down!”
Rodrick’s limbs finally started working again. He snapped out of whatever state he was in. He immediately crossed the room hurriedly and tried to wrench the box cutter out of Greg’s small hand.
Greg began to hyperventilate as he tried to back away from Rodrick. He began crying, trying to escape Rodrick’s grip.
“No, no-“
“WHY ARE YOU?—YOU SHOULDN’T BE DOING THIS, GREG!”
Rodrick’s face was a mixture of anger, worry, and fear. His worry always came off as anger.
He tried to take box cutter away from the tight grip of Greg’s hand. But Greg held onto it. Rodrick had to wrestle it out of his brother’s hand.
“Greg—please, just give me the damn thing!” Rodrick pleaded, his voice trembling.
Greg grunted and cried as he wrestled with his brother for the box cutter. Rodrick finally managed to get ahold of the box cutter. He immediately tossed it across the room like it burned him.
Greg let out a cry as he landed on Rodrick from the force of being pulled. Blood got on Rodrick’s hands and clothes. That’s when Greg finally started speaking.
“I’m sorry, I just—“
Greg held fistfuls of Rodrick’s shirt as he spoke in between sobs as he shamefully hid his face.
“I—I didn’t want you to see me like this…I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”
Rodrick watched in silence as Greg sobbed his heart out, showing the most emotion he’s had in months.
Rodrick didn’t know what to do. What the hell was he supposed to do? He knew Greg had to have been slightly fucked over by watching Frank beat Rodrick.
Rodrick’s been more aware of that since the day Greg had patched him up after Frank had stabbed him with the car keys. but he never thought Greg would resort to—to doing this to himself!
“I—It’s okay-It’s alright. I-It isn’t your fault. It’s—It’ll be okay…”
Rodrick sat up slightly and hugged Greg tightly. He was scared…More scared than Frank had ever made him feel. He ran a hand through Greg’s short, black hair. He wasn’t good at being gentle. He still tried his best, he had to. It’s been a long time since he’s hugged his brother.
“It’s gonna be okay…” Rodrick kept saying over and over. But nothing was okay right now. He didn’t know what else to say. Greg kept on sobbing and sobbing. It sounded so painful, like every cry took something out of him.
Rodrick stared at the wall ahead of him as he kept muttering comforting words. He could feel the sticky blood seeping through parts of his clothes from Greg’s forearms.
Rodrick simply took in a shaky breath and rested his forehead against Greg’s temple.
.
.
.
They were in the bathroom of the house.
The fluorescent lights above made everything look sterile and hollow.
Greg and Rodrick were sitting on the edge of the bathtub. Rodrick had started wrapping gauze around Greg’s forearm after cleaning the wounds and disinfecting them. The bathroom was filled with silence, except for the occasional trembling breath Greg lets out or takes in.
Greg didn’t look at Rodrick the entire time. He couldn’t look at Rodrick. How could he have so stupid to forget to lock the door? Greg’s been doing this for a few months now, and now those months of secrecy have gone down the drain.
Greg winced as Rodrick tugged on the gauze a bit too hard.
“Ow..”
“Sorry.”
Rodrick secured the mediocre wrapping with a piece of medical tape. He slowly let go of Greg’s arm. Greg immediately pulled it to his chest. There was a beat of silence.
.
.
.
Rodrick didn’t know what to say. Was there anything he could say? He knew he couldn’t just up and leave. No, he had to stay. Rodrick rubbed his face and ran a hand through his hair.
“…Look, I—I dunno what I’m supposed to say. I’m…not good at shit like this. I think that’s obvious to everyone I know.”
Rodrick let out a very short lived chuckle. His expression fell again.
“…I care about you. I know I don’t say it often…or much at all. And…I know I say stupid shit to you. and I know I can be a real asshole to you…and…”
“I’m..sorry.”
That made Greg’s head snap towards Rodrick. Rodrick Heffley never apologizes. At least not this directly. Now Rodrick was the one who wasn’t looking at him. He had his eyes on a random tile on the floor.
“I know I can be rude to you. But I…I do love you. A lot. You’re probably the only person in the family I tolerate. It’s—“
He choked on his words for a moment. He swallowed around the lump in his throat.
“It’s fucking scary to see you doing that to yourself.” Rodrick whispered in a shaken voice.
“I never thought I would have to see that, especially if it was you.”
Rodrick took in a breath.
“Please..”
He finally turns to look at Greg in the eye, hands grasping Greg’s shoulders. trying to get him to see that Rodrick was serious about this. That he meant every word.
“Please, don’t do this to yourself. I—if you feel really shitty like this again, tell me. I don’t care if I’m sleeping. O-or pissed off, or even if some crap happened with Frank again. I can’t promise I’ll know what I’m doing. Or know what to say. I—I don’t. But I care about you. I care so much.”
Greg looked at him with wide eyes. Then, he looked down, trying not to cry again.
Greg had spent so long trying to pretend he didn’t care that Rodrick had stopped talking to him, and treating him like he used to. Back before Frank’s temper had started getting worse. Trying to convince himself that Rodrick doesn’t care for him anymore. That he’s changed, and Greg needs to change as well.
Now Rodrick was saying all this stuff to him.
And Greg had no idea what to do with it.
Rodrick gently pulled Greg back into a hug. Greg resisted for a fleeting moment, then he practically melted into it.
They stayed like that for a while. Rodrick can only hope Greg will talk to him, and hope that one day, they can both get out of this house and move on.